Okay, as we all know, the note was written by Sara with help from the CSI writers. Please guys, come back to work soon, we miss your creativity! The rest of the story is my idea. Let me know what you think.

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Gil Grissom was walking through the hallway of the lab, looking for Sara. She had been acting strangly lately and her kiss a little earlier had told him that something was seriously wrong. They had agreed to keep things strictly professional at the lab. Besides, both of them were private people and not inclined to public displays of affection. Having checked all the hallways, he stopped at the reception desk. "Judy, have you seen Sara?"

"She left a few minutes ago, sir, but she did leave something for you." Judy handed him an envelope.

"Thank you," he said as he took the envelope and headed back to his office.

In the quiet of his office, he opened the note.

Gil ... You know I love you.

I feel I've loved you forever. Lately ...I haven't been feeling very well. Truth be told, I'm tired.

Out in the desert, under that car that night, I realized
something, and I haven't been able to shake it. Since my father died, I've
spent almost my entire life with ghosts. We'd been like close friends, and out
there in the desert, it occurred to me that it was time for me to bury them.

I can't do that here. I'm so sorry. No matter how hard I try to fight it off,
I'm left with the feeling that ... I have to go. I have no idea where I'm
going, but I know I have to do this. If I don't, I'm afraid I'll self-destruct,
and worse, you'll be there to see it happen.

Be safe. Know that I tried very hard to stay. Know that you are my one and only. I will miss you with every
beat of my heart. Our life together was the only home I've ever really had. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I love you. I always will.

Good-bye.

Grissom took his glasses off. How had things gotten so bad and he hadn't realized, he wondered. She was out there, hurting and he couldn't help. She left. She left Vegas, her career...him. He stood in the dark, silently crying inside. She was broken and he couldn't help her. And she had left, so now he was broken too.

He had no idea how much time had passed. Standing there in his office, note in hand, time had stopped...everything had stopped for him. He heard a sound and turned to see Catherine standing behind him, watching carefully. Somewhere deep inside, it registered with him that she knew something was terribly wrong. He started to speak, wanted to speak...but nothing would come out. So he just stood there, note in hand, looking lost.

"Gil?" she said, concerned. She'd never seen him quite this disconsolate. Finally, he handed her the note. Reading it quickly, she looked from the paper to him. "Oh my god...Gil, do you have any idea where she went?"

All he could do was nod, negatively. Catherine closed the door to his office and led him to his desk, where he automatically sat.

Finally he managed to make his mouth work. "Thanks."

She sat with him a few minutes. The shift had ended some time ago, so she wasn't worried about work. She knew he wasn't either. But he couldn't stay there like that all day. "Come on, let's get out of her," she suggested.

Looking at her blankly, he shook his head. He didn't want to go home. She wouldn't be there.

Understanding his aversion to go home, she prodded. "Come home with me. I'll fix us some food and a couple of screwdrivers and we'll just hang out. You don't have to talk if you don't want to. I just...well, I think you shouldn't be alone right now."

He looked at her with empty eyes, not even the hurt that he must be feeling registering. Catherine was sad for her friend...and frightened. She knew he was ill equiped for this. While most people fall in and out of love several times in their lifetime, he had never been in love before...not like he loved Sara. And he had never, to Catherine's knowledge, risked this kind of hurt. Finally he had gambled and apparently, he had lost.

They went in her car. He wasn't capable of driving. Simply staring out of the window as she drove, he remained silent. He followed her into her house and lingered in the kitchen as she put together some food. Why is it we always eat when life kicks us, Catherine wondered. She was wrong though. Although she put a plate in front of him, he never touched it. He sat, looking at it, never speaking. She finished hers and carried the dishes to the kitchen. He followed her automatically, looking like a lost little boy, she thought.

They were sitting in her living room when he finally spoke. "I have to go home...Hank."

"Hank? Who's Hank?"

"Our...my dog," he said sadly. She's left and I'm stuck with a dog named after her loser ex boyfriend, he thought to himself.

"I didn't know you had a dog...hey, didn't Sara date a guy named Hank awhile back?"

"Yeah," was all he said.

"Oh..." Well, at least he's talking a little, she mused. "Okay, I'll take you home to see about the dog. But you're sleeping here tonight."

Gil's eyebrow shot up briefly but he said nothing. Following her to her car, he climbed in the passenger side. Once they were at his place, he got out. This time she followed him. She didn't want him walking into that house alone.

Slowly he put the key in the lock and turned it. Stepping inside the door, he was immediately greeted by a big boxer, obviously happy to have him home. Gil patted his head absently. Catherine walked in and watched the exchange. Then Gil pulled a leash off a hook nearby and hooked it to the dog's collar. "Have to go walk him," Gil said.

"Mind if I go too?"

"Okay." He headed out the door and the three of them walked to the sidewalk. They made the block and headed back inside. Gil went through the motions of normalcy. He put food out and fresh water for Hank. He checked the stack of mail on the counter and then sat down on his couch. Catherine followed him and sat at the other end. "Really Cath, I'm okay. You have Lindsey to take care of. I think I'm going to do some reading and then go to bed."

Recognizing her cue to leave, she said good bye and slipped out of the door. Gil sat on the couch awhile longer, staring at nothing. Eventually he walked around the house, looking in each room. He wasn't expecting to find her, but he was hoping...

Back on the couch, he pulled the note out of his pocket and read it again. "You know I love you..." He thought he knew that. But if she loved him, why did she leave without even talking to him? Of course, he knew the answer. If she had talked to him, he would have convinced her to stay...or he would have gone with her. Neither was what she wanted. More than anything, he wanted her to have what she wanted; he wanted her to be happy. Somewhere in the back of his mind that old saying from the seventies popped out. If you love someone, let them go... So he had to let her go.

Looking at the note again, he repeated, "I will miss you with every beat of my heart." Yeah, he thought...me too. He slid down onto the couch and slowly drifted off to sleep. Several hours later, he was awakened to the sloppy licks of Hank. "Time for another walk, fella?"

Hank wagged his tail and Gil recognized the hint. Grabbing the leash, he hooked it to the dog's collar and they headed out of the door. As they made the block, Gil was deep in thought. He knew Sara had demons from her past; they had talked about them from time to time. It was what drove her on so many cases. But this last case, it had really gotten to her. He wished he'd read the signs better, but he was just so happy that she was alive. He had been so frightened when Natalie had kidnapped her and left her in the desert that his relief at her return to him had been all consuming. He'd finally even admitted to himself how much he needed her and suggested that they get married. She'd agreed, he muttered to himself. Why had she agreed to marry him and then left like that? Did she not want to marry him? Sadness filled his heart as he realized he wasn't enough for her but he knew that the same could be said of him; she wasn't enough, he needed his work. She had brought joy into his life, but his work was a part of him.

They were back in front of his house. He led Hank inside, unhooked the leash, and returned to the couch. Hank pattered off to his bed in the corner and the house grew quiet, too quiet. He missed her presence. Suddenly he felt lonlier than he'd ever felt in his life. Tears leaked from his eyes and as he gave in to his sadness, he began to weep. He hated the weakness he was feeling. Finally he forced himself to stop. "Get a grip," he told himself outloud. Just as he got his emotions under control again, there was a knock at his door.

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