Author's Note: It's hard to find good Parental!RoyEd stories out there. So I thought I'd write one, simple as that :) Warning, Ed's mouth is unsurprising very dirty, and he goes through a bit of a caps lock of rage bout near the end of the chapter! The timeline is set as probably shortly after or before Lab 5, or around there.

Summary: Roy finally managed to get that break he always wanted, though a trek through a fierce blizzard carrying a feverish Ed wasn't what he'd had in mind...After a train to northern Amestris derails under suspicious circumstances, Roy Mustang and Edward Elric are forced to rely on each other, just when they realize they're being followed. [Parental!RoyEd. Constructive critism will be worshiped. Spoilers for Anime and Manga.]

Fullmetal Alchemist and all related non-original (as in, not made by myself) subjects © Hiromu Arakawa, Viz, etc. I'm only borrowing them for a bit, and intend to return them whole and recognizable- I swear :)

The horribly maimed quote from Sonnet 18 © Shakespeare.

By Chance Or Changing Course

Chapter One: Going and Coming

Roy Mustang had never been able to understand the appeal of train rides. They were bumpy, boring and normally something he tried to avoid. Of course, he liked going new places and seeing new things like most people, but trains were certainly not the way to do that, in his not-so-humble opinion.

And if you added in the fact that he was heading towards a freezing cold backwater city with his most bad-tempered subordinate …well, the higher-ups might want to think about investing in flame-retardant clothing.

"I can't wait to be off this stupid train…two damn hours squashed next to the biggest bastard I know, and Al can't even come." The 'bad-tempered subordinate' murmured resentfully, out cold as he was on the seat across from Roy. Edward Elric was as short as his temper, but Roy had to agree that this was cruel and unusual punishment.

"We're deploying a team of state alchemists to help control the situation out north. Drachma apparently doesn't value our non-aggression pact, especially with the tempting new trail discovered to cross the Briggs Mountain range. I volunteered you and Fullmetal. I trust you will act on these orders promptly."

And he'd gritted his teeth and said "Yes, sir." As politely as he could manage. This of course meant that he promptly went off to buy tickets for the next train to North City, which they had naturally missed anyway. It was his job to follow orders, even the ones he certainly didn't want to follow.

One of these days, I'll be Fuhrer, and he'll be the one dragged away from his work with little warning to go on some inane train ride. Roy thought with irritation, trying to massage away the burning in his eyes.

Secure in the knowledge of his future revenge, he leaned back in the relatively uncomfortable seat, glancing around his surroundings wearily. No one else was in their car besides an old lady, what appeared to be a young girl and her father, and a businessman with his face hidden by the newspaper he was currently reading. Curious…why so few people?

But then, it was the middle of the week and most people were off at work at this time of day. It didn't surprise him that not many other people were riding the rails today.

Roy checked his pocket watch, noting glumly that he still had an hour or two left before they reached their destination. Considering how late he'd had to stay up the night before preparing for this trip, he was almost tempted to fall asleep there and then.

That was, if he hadn't known better. Ed had standards, but Roy certainly didn't trust him not to sneak off, find a marker and scribble a mustache and goatee on him while he slept. He'd been surprisingly cooperative earlier, playing solitaire with a stack of cards he'd produced out of seemingly nowhere and ignoring the colonel completely. But Roy knew better than to expect it to last.

I can never win, can I? He thought wryly, realizing that at this point, the situation couldn't get much worse. To top it all off, he was cold, tired and thoroughly convinced it'd be a long while before he managed to get his lunch.

With no warning at all, the train stopped abruptly, nearly throwing Roy and Ed out of their seats. There was the sound of whining gears, and then a loud rumble that shook the train before silence descended on the car. The businessman and old lady glanced at the exits, confused, while Roy heard the father reassuring his startled daughter in a low voice.

"We apologize in advance, but it there seems to be a technical difficulty in the fourth car. We hope to get moving soon, and have a nice day." The announcement ended with a statically click.

Ed blinked drowsily, still half-asleep despite his rude awakening. "The fourth car…isn't that the one behind ours?"

"Must be some sort of electrical problem. This is an older train after all." Roy replied, unable to shake a sudden strange feeling that it was more than that. Edward shrugged, leaning back and gradually started to doze off again. The colonel was just fighting the temptation to take advantage of this to get retribution for years of pain and torture, when his thoughts were rudely interrupted.

"Hello!" He turned, and found himself looking at a young, four-year-old girl. She was clutching a teddy bear with a missing button eye, sucking her thumb as the hint of a smile graced her face. It was the daughter from before; now looking calmer and much more relaxed.

"Can I help you?" Roy asked bluntly, wondering why she'd suddenly taken an interest in him.

She giggled, and he raised an eyebrow. "Nothing, I've just never seen anyone like Daddy and me before. He said Mommy had to go somewhere a long time ago, but everyone else seems to have a mommy but me."

Roy raised an eyebrow, not too certain how to reply to that. What was she talking about…?

"Mary! I'm sorry about this." At once hands scooped up the little girl, as her father gave him a sheepish look. "She won't bother you and your son again."

"Oh, I'm not his-" But it was too late. The little girl had been soundly herded off, and Roy watched her go with a sort of exasperated curiosity until she noticed him and waved. He looked back out the window quickly, sighing to himself.

If it isn't Maes trying to matchmake me with someone, it's someone else trying to push me into parenting…

"Mmm…I didn't set the rug on fire, Mom…the matches just sort of lighted accidentally…" Ed mumbled, talking in his sleep yet again.

Roy's eyebrow twitched, then only outward sign of irritation on his carefully schooled, blank expression. Good thing I'm not fully responsible for him.

The scenery itself was fairly mundane. Roy assumed they were on some sort of a mountainside, but he could barely make out the valley below through the many trees. He disinterestedly noticed a weathered sign nearby, which read:

Azeotrope 2 miles

North City 15 miles

Azeotrope…that sounded familiar.

Abruptly the train lurched into motion. Just as Roy resigned himself to the long ride ahead, the bad feeling increased exponentially. It was the sort of intuition learned after never-ending months spent digging trenches and cocking rifles, the instinct war that had taught him to act upon as soon as he felt it. The colonel tensed, feeling an urgent sort of desperation desperately clawing for release.

Ed, having given up on sleeping by this point, noticed. Though he couldn't quite understand why, for once he took pity on the colonel, abruptly sobering. "Hey, Colonel…you okay?"

"There's something wrong…" Roy answered cryptically. Sitting up a bit straighter in his seat, Ed peered over the seat to the front and then the back of the car as well. The teenager sat back down, his tone surly and his earlier sympathy vanishing.

"You're just imagining things."

They didn't even have time to react when the car suddenly jerked, the sound of screeching metal scaring Roy and Ed out of their wits. Cursing, the colonel grabbed Ed by the scuff of his neck just before the car felt over onto its side, narrowly saving the teenager from being thrown against the opposite side of the train.

The glass from the window close by was smashed by the impact, and Ed roughly pulled Roy out of the way of the flying glass. Others weren't so lucky, and the sounds of screams and cries were heard over the sound of the other windows breaking.

"Thanks." Roy croaked, his throat coated with dust. The air was thick with it; he could only just make out Ed's silhouette in the haze. The colonel coughed loudly and with alarming intensity, covering his mouth. Roy was shocked to find blood on his hand when he pulled away, but quickly realized it was from a shallow cut he'd gotten from a flying shard of glass.

"What the hell just happened?!" Ed asked, panicked.

There was a loud groan, and everyone froze. The car tilted just a bit more, and Roy realized with sudden clarity it had been precariously balanced on the edge of the mountainside before as it was, and they were about to fall.

"BRACE YOURSELVES!" He yelled, but it was too late.

There was the sounding of grinding metal, and then Roy felt a sense of disconcerting weightlessness as they fell. He hit the side of the train, Ed slamming into him at the same moment. Faster and faster it went; the loud roar of the sliding car as it tore through the surrounding wood drowning out any other sound or thoughts.

Ed had scarcely managed to grab onto something, before he felt suddenly light again. There was a crash, and he was flung to the opposite side of the train. He accidentally slammed into Roy, and born of them were roughly tossed out the now right-side up window.

They landed violently; Roy against a tree, and Ed against a nearby rocky outcropping. Roy wheezed as all the air was knocked out of him, but was more the less unharmed. Ed was much less fortunate. He was thrown against a large boulder, screaming in pain as a bloody gash was gouged out of his side. Mercifully, he lost conscious a few minutes later from a blow to the head.

The mechanisms tying the cars together snapped. The individual cars spun in the air, for a moment airborne again, before landing upside down with a crash. With a groan, they all started to tilt slightly, and then finally settled as they were. But this was about all the wiring could take; the ceiling lights in each car began to spark and crackle, and quite suddenly caught fire. Smoke poured from the few broken windows, as people frantically tried to escape the disaster in the making.

Both of them lay there for a moment, tired and wracked with agony, before Roy unsteadily managed to regain his footing and stumbled over to his subordinate, falling down into the deep snow from sheer exhaustion. His pride virtually shot by this point, he nevertheless struggled to get up again.

"Fullmetal?" He said roughly, his voice cracking from stress and a myriad of other feelings.

The teenager didn't respond immediately, but eventually managed to reply.

"Still…Alive…" Ed's voice sounded higher and hoarser than usual.

Roy felt the ghost of a smile tug at his lips, relieved that the alchemist had managed to survive the fall. "Hurt?"

"Y-yeah…" Ed managed, before whimpering slightly. He tried to block the pain from his mind like he usually did, but his head hurt felt like it was stuffed with cotton. In some ways, it almost felt worse than the pain that inevitably came with automail. At least that rarely lasted very long.

Roy heard more screaming, and blearily looked up. The train was suspended twenty feet or less above them, held in place by the amount of debris that had accumulated around it during its fall. Smoke was rising from it in thick black columns, roaring flames licking hungrily at the sides.

"There are…p-people…still in there…" Ed tried to finish what he was saying, but reluctantly gave up. Talking just hurt too much.

Roy, however, understood immediately. His eyes widened as the reality of the situation asserted itself, and looked up at the burning wreckage above him. There were still people trapped in the train, but the blaze was growing larger at what should have been an impossible rate-

Gas lighting…the train has gas lighting…

"Ed, get down!"

Roy had barely managed to heave himself and his subordinate behind the rock, when the train exploded. Ed caught a glimpse of the bright light, and then yelped and feebly clawed at his eyes when they started to hurt. The noise of the blast was deafening, and huddled close together behind the rock as they possibly could as fire and searing fragments rained down around them. Ed's head started to throb, and then everything faded to black.

---

His side really, really hurt. This was something Edward Elric became aware of as he gradually woke up. He opened his eyes, and felt a flash of irritation when he realized everything was pitch black. He must have dosed off again in the middle of researching the philosopher's stone…sleeping in an uncomfortable position again, no doubt, which sort of accounted for the pain.

Then he realized he was sitting next to someone, on a slant and leaning against something very rough. Something wet was flowing down his cheek. He realized it was blood immediately.

It wasn't a dream… He thought dully, wondering for a moment if he was still asleep. Pinching his flesh arm answered that question quickly enough.

Roy was preoccupied with a thousand questions, none of which he had satisfactory answers to. He gazed at the carnage before him half-amazed and half-disbelieving. Trees had been torn from the ground and thrown haphazardly into a large, smoldering pile an astounding distance away.

The ground was completely barren; most of the snow and grass had disappeared in the explosion. Shrapnel littered the ground in generous quantities, including a piece off the engine with the words 'Royal Blue Central Line' barely legible on the side. Small fires were scattered here and there among the remains, burning the few places that had been sheltered from the explosion.

The last time he'd seen such carnage…he'd been back in Ishbal, fighting for his life. And his sanity.

His mouth went completely dry at the thought. Roy slowly stood up, warily peering over the top of the only thing that had stood between them and certain death only moments before. The sight that met his eyes was anything but pretty. The smell of burning flesh was faint, but still lingered notably in the air. Roy could only assume some of the small, burnt piles of ash nearest to the train were corpses.

Roy Mustang had seen a lot of horrible things in his life. He'd been though war, famine, and even worse. He'd thought he'd seen the worst life had to offer. But nothing could have prepared him for the sight that lay before him. Shakily, Roy nevertheless pulled himself up onto the rock and surveyed the full extent of the damage.

Ed felt something move next to him, and jerked when he heard a strangled, choking sound. "What is it? Mustang, is that you?"

The flame alchemist was unable to reply, crouched over a burnt toy he knew instantly was once a toy bear. A toy bear with a missing button eye, to be exact.

Ed, however, would not be deterred from finding out where that sound had come from. He vaguely realized that it had been very close…maybe on top of the boulder he was leaning against? Knowing he didn't have much to lose from trying to find out, he hoisted himself up. Managing to clamber onto it, Edward felt a brief flash of triumph when his searching fingers came into contact with Roy's leg. Feebly, he stood up, teetering a bit as he regained his balance.

"Colonel?" He asked hesitantly.

Roy tried his best to regain his composure, knowing all the while it was ridiculous that he was so broken up. He'd seen it all before, but somehow that knowledge didn't give him any comfort or courage now that he was seeing it again. The war was over, the enemy was beat, so why did something like this happen? How had he become so dammed sensitive?

He took a deep breath to calm himself, logic reasserting him. When Roy finally responded, he was unable to keep his tone from wavering slightly. "It's nothing. I just found something that…never mind."

Ed couldn't restrain his curiosity. "What did you find?"

"Just…a toy."

Ed felt a chill go down his spine. "S-so, that's it? Everyone's dead except us?"

Roy flinched, pausing for a moment when he found himself reluctant to answer that particular question. "…Yes, I think so. That train had gas lighting, which was the cause of the…explosion. If it hadn't been for the boulder we're standing on, we would have been incinerated."

They both paused at that unsettling revelation, both of them beyond words. Roy looked up at all that remained of the engine, wondering for a second if someone could have survived the blast. One look at the twisted metal that had once been the passenger cars told him at once. No one else could have, unless they'd ended up the same way as himself and Ed-

Ed…

Roy looked quickly at his charge, relaxing when he realized that he had no life-threatening injuries. The teenager had lost his infamous red coat sometime before the explosion; probably when they'd been bodily thrown out one of the windows. He was covered head to foot in dust, blood and soot, and his clothes were ripped in several places. Ed's eyes were unfocused, but the colonel wasn't that surprised considering the situation at hand. In other words, Ed looked pretty much the same as Roy probably did.

It was at this point he noticed the large wound on the teenager's left side. It looked deep and painful, though thankfully not like something that couldn't be healed with time. Still, it would be a good idea to get to the closest town and seek medical treatment for it right away. Infection was the kiss of death out here in the wilds of northern Amestris, especially with winter fast approaching and no real supplies on hand to ward off exposure.

"That cut on your side looks pretty bad." He remarked nonchalantly, trying to muster the nonchalance and self-control a superior officer should have in these circumstances. "We should get that looked at as soon as we can. It's still daylight out, maybe we can follow the tracks-"

"Wait, daylight?" Ed interrupted, looking annoyed. "If that's your idea of a joke, it's not funny."

Roy glanced back angrily. "What are you talking about? Do you think I would be joking right now?"

"It's pitch black," Ed replied testily. "How the hell could it be daylight if…"

The teenager trailed off, a sick feeling churning in the pit of his stomach. His mind told him that of course it was the middle of the night; why else couldn't he see his hand in front of his face? The train wreck had probably taken place earlier in the day, and he'd just been so weak from blood loss and adrenaline that he'd passed out. But then why the hell would Mustang bother denying something so obvious?

"Oh, I get it." Ed said smugly, unable to see the irritated and confused expression on Mustang's face. "You're trying to get me to think I'm blind."

"Ed, I don't think you-"

Ed laughed. "Nice try Mustang, you'll have to think of something better than that."

Roy sighed. "Ed…do you read the 'Central Times'?"

"…Yeah, of course I do."

"Do you remember what they had listed in the back?"

"Something about an uprising in the north?"

"No, about the full moon tonight."

That gave Ed pause. "…So? It's probably cloudy out."

Roy sighed, and then suddenly realized a way he could convince his subordinate once and for all. Wordlessly, he handed Ed one of his gloves. Ed gave him an uncomprehending look.

"That's one of my gloves. You can feel the transmutation circle sewn into it, right? I'm going to put it on right now, and if you can't see any sparks when I snap my fingers, we'll find out if you really are blind, alright?"

Ed scowled, but nodded and handed back the glove, obviously thinking the whole idea was stupid. Roy carefully put on the glove he'd handed Ed, and then snapped his fingers. There was a sound like a soft bang, and a tongue of flame appeared in the air between them. It floated there for a second, and then disappeared.

Ed's pupils didn't dilate, despite the bright light. Despite the fact that they should have. But he didn't even focus on Roy, seemingly staring into space.

"So, where is it?"

….Oh hell, this wasn't something he wanted to explain. Nevertheless, Roy assumed a professional tone.

"I already snapped my fingers, Fullmetal. If you didn't see anything, that's because you're blind."

Ed grit his teeth, his eyes narrowing. "You're lying."

"No, I'm not." Roy said simply.

He sounded so truthful…and then the next moment Ed started shaking. He stepped back only to have his foot meet empty air, and realized in that split second that that had been an extremely stupid thing to do. The colonel attempted to grab his arm, but not even Roy's quick reflexes could save him.

Ed slammed into ground, barely managing hold back a shout as a piece of shrapnel dug into his wounded side. Roy swore and jumped lightly off the rock, pulling the whimpering teenager up and immediately checking the damage done.

"Be more careful!" Roy said harshly, his heart racing. His anger vanished at Ed's next words.

"…I'm blind?"

There was a suddenly uncomfortable silence. There was so much desperation and bewilderment in his voice; as if he wanted Roy to tell him this was all a sick prank and he really had him going there, didn't he? Ed waited anxiously, but no such confession ever came. His anger conflicted with fear and countless other emotions, before finally causing the teenager to lose control.

"DAMMIT, I'M NOT BLIND! I CAN'T BE BLIND!"

But his scream didn't do any good, and both of them knew it. And though Ed tried furiously to blink and wipe them away, tears came to his eyes and started streaming down his face. And then he was all out crying, sobbing and all the while hating himself for doing it. His knees gave out on his, and he doubled over, sinking to the ground.

"I'm not blind, I'm not blind…" It became a sort of mantra, and Ed just couldn't stop repeating it. He…he couldn't afford to be blind…he hadn't been blind a moment ago, why was he now and he had so much left to do oh god not now not to me-

Roy sat down heavily, unable to suppress a flicker of remorse If he'd never told Ed, he just could have pretended everything was fine and it really was the middle of the night. His logical side immediately told him that wouldn't have made any difference, but still, he couldn't help but dwell on the thought.

And so Roy uncomfortably looked away, trying to pretend he wasn't seeing Ed breaking down in front of him. Gradually however the sobs died down, until all he could hear was a few miserable hiccups and the occasional sob. After a minute, Ed finally managed to stand up, staggering as he did so.

"H-how am I supposed to research the p-philosopher's stone if I can't read? Or write? Or draw a transmutation circle?" Ed said miserably, with an expression that was dangerously close to self-pity.

Roy didn't reply, knowing full well that the questions were rhetorical and Ed had probably forgotten he was there. No doubt he was still reeling from the shock of the train wreck, which partially explained his strange behaviour. Finding out he was blind…well, Roy understood all to well why it was affecting him so deeply. This hadn't been the first time he'd known someone who was blinded by accident, after all.

"I keep trying to find it…but it's been so long. How much more can I afford to lose to find it? What else can I lose, besides Al? How the hell can I lose so much, and gain so little?!"

Something about his voice unnerved Roy, and for a moment he couldn't quite understand why. Then he realized it was the all too apparent undercurrent of loathing; towards what, the colonel couldn't say. He had the feeling it wasn't addressed to anything or anyone in particular.

Roy knew he should stay quiet and let Ed get it out of his system, but something told him that if Ed was allowed to go on much longer, it might not be entirely healthy for him. And so he did the first thing that came to mind; steeling himself, Roy got up and slapped Ed as hard as he could.

"Knock it off, Fullmetal. We have bigger things to worry about." Roy said firmly, though no words were necessary. He was satisfied when Ed's expression quickly changed from vulnerable and depressed to angry and vindictive. If Ed had to pick someone to blame, better Roy instead of himself.

"You bastard…you were there the whole time, weren't you? You didn't feel like doing anything except letting me go on, just like how you didn't bother to help those people on the train!"

Roy distantly realized he should have known this would happen beforehand. This wasn't the plan. The plan was to snap him out of it, not to provoke him.

Nevertheless, Roy managed to keep his voice monotone. A remarkable achievement, considering. "I couldn't do anything. It happened too quickly. You're an alchemist too, you could have done something-"

"YOU LIVED THROUGH A DAMN WAR! YOU'RE USED TO THINGS LIKE THIS HAPPENING! THE ENEMY NEVER KNOCKS ON YOUR DOOR AND SAYS 'HEY, I'M GOING TO ATTACK YOU NOW'! IT'S YOUR DAMN FAULT SO MANY PEOPLE DIED! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?!"

Ed threw himself in Mustang's general direction, intending on punching him out or at least causing as much pain as he could, but missed by a mile. He felt a hand grab his arm and roughly push Ed down, his arms pinned behind his back as he landed face-first in the mixture of ash and dirt on the ground.

"You don't have a clue what war is about. Don't pretend you do." Roy's tone was dangerously calm, and Ed felt a glimmer of panic. He was blind, helpless and weak from blood loss at the moment, while Roy was in better condition. If he'd pushed the colonel enough, who knew what he might do. After a moment, however, the arms let go and the heavy weight pinning him to ground disappeared.

There was complete silence. Ed wondered now that he'd gone too far, but his pride naturally prevented him from taking it back and apologizing. He shivered as a cold breeze blew past, noting that his coat had been torn off. He wouldn't normally be this cold. Probably another thing he could thank the train accident for.

But the silence stretched on, until he heard the one thing he'd hoped he wouldn't hear: footsteps. Roy was walking away. And then he couldn't hear anything.

Finally, Ed couldn't take it anymore. "Wait, Roy, I-"

His apology was muffled by something…soft, which had flung out of nowhere and hit him straight in the face. Pulling it off, he realized from the feel of it that it was a coat of some sort, covered in cord and buttons. Wait…was it Roy's military coat?

The footsteps came closer now, until Ed could hear them less than a metre away. There was a sigh, and he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"We'll have to climb up to the tracks. We can follow them into the next town…I saw a sign a few leagues back. There's one only two miles away. I'll carry you."

"What?" Ed asked, confused.

"I'm sorry; I had to…get something."

Ed raised an eyebrow, and then remembered. He lowered his eyes. "Oh, the toy …right?"

"Yes." Roy replied quietly. "I just wanted to give it back to the little girl it belonged to."

Ed didn't have a suitable reply to that, looking away momentarily. "Why are you offering to help me, and why did you give me this?" He held up the coat.

"Because I don't leave people behind to freeze to death, and you were shivering." Roy replied simply. Unbidden, something Havoc had once said to him floated to the front of his mind

"If that were the only thing about him, we wouldn't follow him."

Roy continued on. "There's just one condition. Neither of us did anything a few moments ago we'd regret telling anyone else, okay?"

"You're trying to manipulate things to your advantage again, aren't you?" Ed answered frankly, regretting the words as soon as they left his mouth. Surprisingly, Roy laughed.

"Ed, I'm not omnipotent. You seriously think I could turn a disaster like this into a promotion? I'd rather not die from exposure, thanks."

Ed mulled that over for a few minutes. "…No, I guess not." He reluctantly agreed. "But you're not carrying me up there; I can make it by myself."

"With that wound? I somehow doubt that." They both noted that he didn't mention Ed's blindness.

"…Fine." Under normal circumstances, Ed would never agree to something like this. But slipping and sliding down the mountainside didn't sound like an ideal way to spend an afternoon.

"Just remember to hold on tight…but not too tight." Ed felt himself being picked up, and tried his best to get a good grip when he felt Roy's shoulders underneath his hands. When Ed finally felt secure enough and certain he wouldn't fall off, Roy started up the mountain, carefully searching for handholds.

"…This is embarrassing." Ed murmured. "If you tell anyone else about this, I'll kick your ass."

"I'm not keen on the idea myself. And I hate to give you false hope…" Roy hesitated briefly here, his normal smug tone vanishing with his next words. "…but your blindness may not be permanent."

Ed didn't dare let himself hope. "Are you sure?"

"We'll know for sure in a week."

"A week, huh? I could live with that."

And so, filled with hope, they both set out to conquer the mountainside before them…although it was mostly Roy who was doing the conquering at that point.

---

Well, that's the first chapter down. Exhausting to write, and even more exhausting to go over, but it was worth it. Hope you guys like it, and please review if you can! :)