He was tired. Exhausted. Ready to pass out. Desirous of a long rest, or at the very least, a cat nap. His calves ached, and if he could get through the remainder of his life without seeing a staircase again, Balthier would die a happy man. Why tempt a man with an elevator if it didn't go to the top? And why not have a mooring for an airship at the top? Surely the architects of the bloody place had not considered the needs of future travelers to the Cataract. And for that, he was increasingly irritated.

They'd been going up up up the stairs in the Pharos for what felt like an eternity. In reality, it was three miserable days, but they were probably the worst of his life. When they rested for the night, his legs would shake as if he should still be climbing the blasted steps. Their rations were running low, and everyone was in a rather sour mood. Save Fran of course. Nothing bothered her unless it was mist-covered. Basch was usually even-tempered enough, but the knight had been sharing the second watch with Vaan the past three nights, and Balthier caught a glint in the older man's eye once or twice. A glint that implied "Would anyone notice if Vaan went missing?"

Little Penelo's legs were the shortest, and so Balthier imagined that she was in the most agony of all as she tried to keep pace with them all. Her pigtails were less and less held together as the days went on, and this morning the girl had opted to just leave her hair wild and undone. Reddas had grown increasingly quiet, his short swords doing the talking for him as he cut them a path up the never ending stairs. But as irritated as Balthier was, his annoyances were as nothing compared to their unofficial leader.

Balthier had made sure to be behind her as they traipsed about the place. There were few comforts to be had in the drafty old structure, and he took his leave to enjoy the view of a certain Dalmascan treasure as he climbed each day. Though the mere scrap of pink fabric covered his most desired possession, the body it was attached to was more of a problem. Ashe was being – in no uncertain terms – a horrid cow.

They rested when she was in need of rest. They walked until she decided they'd walked long enough. She snapped at them for suggesting shortcuts. She glared at them for whispering behind her back about the decision she had to make at the top. And she especially did not enjoy discovering Balthier's eyes upon her anatomy. It had taken her three days, but she'd finally caught on to his place in their marching order.

He thought he'd have been able to get away with it for a mite longer, but a fiend had swooped down at them, and she'd fallen back. And he'd steadied her…by holding her in place by her hips. And then there'd been the friendly grope he'd given her to make sure she was alright. Balthier had been tempting fate with that maneuver, and Fran had been the only one to see it. But his partner had not been the only one to hear the sound of the crack of a royal hand against his stubble-laden face. The entire group had paused at that.

Ashe had not wished to explain to the group about the bum grabbing incident, instead deciding to stomp off in her usual huffy manner as they broke for lunch. The party ate in silence, only bits of bread and cheese to stave off their increasing hunger. The meal consumed, they all shouldered either their weapons or packs depending on what shift they were in and on they climbed.

But Balthier noticed then that their marching order had changed. He was now second to last with the Princess bringing up the rear. And as he discovered that she was at the rear, he found a pair of dark blue eyes looking away from his own rear in utmost haste. Turnabout, he mused jovially, this could be fun. They were all a bit exhausted. Probably wouldn't be the best idea to take the piss with Ashe in her current state of mind, but she had been examining him in a nearly doctor/patient manner. He knew that because he'd been paying her the same courtesy the past several days.

"Like what you see?"

She grew incredibly pink. "I don't know what you mean," Ashe mumbled. Instead of marching behind him, she climbed beside him.

"Please, Princess. I know it's a great temptation. What mysteries lie within the trousers of the leading man?"

Ashe looked about ready to scream, but she held her tongue. They had fallen a bit behind the others. He watched her crane her neck to see if they were out of earshot, and then she unleashed her retort. "It's not much of a mystery. They're rather tight, are they not?"

"Said the pot to the kettle!" he teased. "I could say the same of you."

He saw her hand move to her scabbard almost unconsciously. "Are we really talking about our wardrobe choices, Balthier? We need to catch up with the others."

Balthier decided to move to phase two of his usual routine. "Of course, silly me. Let's make haste then." But as he said so, he slung his gun over his shoulder dramatically, then tugged on his sleeves, rolling them each up to his elbows. The Princess showed a lot of skin, but the sky pirate Balthier did not. Make them want you, one of his mentors in Balfonheim had told him. Tease them slowly. Tempt them slowly.

The Princess was clearly distracted by the site of his forearms. Just forearms to be sure, but she'd never seen them in all this time. He slept in long sleeves, fought in long sleeves. It was like an undiscovered country to her, he was positive.

"Ashe, come on! Balthier!"

Balthier scowled at Vaan's interruption. His seduction required perfect timing. He couldn't have scrawny street rats destroying his set-up to win the comforts of the Princess. Ashe was immediately drawn away from the sky pirate skin show, hurrying up the stairs after the others. He did get to enjoy the sight of the royal rump once more, but he couldn't lag behind. Apparently the others had found some transporting device.

The sky pirate loathed the contraptions. They zapped you from one part of a structure to another, and you had no idea of knowing what awaited you at the other end. Basch examined it with some measure of disdain. They'd been separated for a few hours the other day. Apparently there was some malfunction in a lot of the zappy devices. They'd spent the better part of an afternoon looking for Vaan and Fran who had been sent fourteen floors in the opposite direction from the rest of them.

"In pairs and one group of three," Reddas announced. Penelo latched onto Vaan's arm, and Balthier wondered how hard the poor thing had hit her head to think that the boy would be the best person to partner up with. Luckily for them, Reddas decided to accompany them and off they went. Basch turned to see him and Ashe bringing up the rear, and the look in the man's features hinted that he would be the preferred transport partner for the Princess.

But unfortunately for the Captain, Balthier had discovered the man's secret. Basch had a thing for Fran. It was subtle, stoic admiration on the man's part, and Balthier found it rather precious. Fran had not given any indication to the sky pirate that she had an interest, but Basch was getting up there in years. He should take comforts where he could, should he not? Inclining his head in Fran's direction, Balthier hinted with as much subtlety as possible that the Viera should be Basch's zapping companion.

"Your Highness, I…" the Captain began, but Fran had already grabbed the man's arm. Balthier withheld a grin as the Captain paled at her touch. Oh yes, Fran was very very good. He owed her big time for this. "I…will accompany Fran this time."

Ashe nodded, and Balthier noticed that she had not missed the interaction between Viera and knight. And it appeared that the Princess was incredibly amused. When Fran and Basch had spirited away, he gave Ashe a smile. She seemed to immediately forget how irritated she was with him, and she returned the expression.

"Young love, huh?" he joked, and the Princess laughed. He offered a bared arm. "Well? Ready?" She rolled her eyes and declined his chivalry. He sighed and walked after her. They faced each other from either side of the device.

"See you on the other side," she mused aloud, and they both touched the device. A cool whooshing breeze suffused his entire person, a feeling that always unnerved him a bit. It was as if every molecule within him was tingling at once, and it was downright unsettling. He felt like he was being pulled apart and smashed together at the same time.

His feet felt solid ground beneath him again, but he couldn't see a damn thing. "So…" he muttered.

"Balthier?"

It was the Princess, and her voice was very close. He could see the device in front of them, the light faint and for some reason, fading. Shuffling slowly around to avoid touching the device again, he reached out an arm. "I'm right here, Ashe."

He felt tentative fingers brush against his skin, and then she latched onto him. "Where did we end up? Where are the others?" She moved closer to him, and he could see her outline faintly in the light glow of the transporting device.

"I think we've been separated." That much was obvious, he thought. The way their voices were bouncing right back at them, he knew they were in a rather small, dark room. "Shall we try going back to the start? Give it another go?"

She loosened her grip on his arm. "Very well." He heard her footsteps move slowly to the other side of the device. "I'm ready."

"Pesky place, this." He nodded to her, and they placed their hands on the transporter.

And nothing happened.

The light emanating from the device faded even further. "Damn it," he mumbled. They tried again. Nothing. The light was nearly gone. "I think it's…well. Let's just say that there better be an alternate exit to this place."

"A false wall, hopefully," Ashe replied evenly, but he could already detect her growing irritation. Although he'd dreamed of sharing a darkened room with the Princess for what felt like ages now, this darkened room was turning into the last place he needed to be stuck with Ashe.

"I will start behind me, and you start where you are. Feel around for a switch." The only sounds they heard for the next few minutes were the sound of a gun butt and a sword smacking against the old stone. He heard shuffling steps only a few feet away. "Nothing."

He heard the Princess fling her sword onto the ground angrily. "Nothing! Where in the world are we? And why can't we get back?" She was quiet for a moment, and he felt her shift around. He could faintly see that she was glaring at him. "You! What did you do to the device?"

"Me? You're insane. I didn't do anything to the blasted thing. I only mess with airships, Princess!" He saw her shoulders slump, and she moved away from him to the device again. "I'd think that you'd have a better explanation. Your damned ancestors designed the stupid place, all the booby traps to protect your bloody legacy!"

"The gods designed the Pharos, Balthier." He watched her touch the device a dozen more times, the light fading more each time.

"You're putting the light out! Stop fiddling with it!" He moved over to her and gave her hand a tap.

"Don't touch me!"

"Then stop touching the device!"

"Don't tell me what to do!"

"Don't tell me what to do! I'm not your slave!"

"Balthier!"

"What?" he screamed in exasperation.

"I…"

And that was when the light was completely extinguished.

"Fuck!" Ashe screamed. He was stunned into silence at her outburst. "I'm…I'm sorry, it slipped."

He knew she couldn't see the grin that was crossing his face. "Don't apologize, I like hearing you curse."

Balthier heard her footsteps shuffle off, and he heard her back slide down the wall to sit down on the floor. "You like to hear that sort of language? It's crude."

He crept over to where he thought she was, and he moved to sit down as well. "You there?" Her hand smacked his face accidentally. "Yep, definitely there." She mumbled an apology, and he set his gun down on his other side. They sat side by side in silence for several moments.

"What's the plan?" she asked cautiously, her voice trembling a bit.

The sky pirate sighed in exhaustion. "Well, no false wall. No transporting out. So I guess the answer is death."

"Balthier!"

He chuckled. "The truth hurts, I know, Princess. Maybe if we're lucky, the others will find us."

"Maybe? Well, why don't we shout for them?"

He gestured with his hand and accidentally brushed against her arm. "Sorry. Anyhow, they could be anywhere. Maybe we should wait to hear them calling us, don't you think? Save our energy?"

"You want to just sit here?" she replied angrily, her voice raising a few octaves in her disgust.

Balthier shrugged. "Better idea?" Ashe didn't respond. "I didn't think so." The darkness was comforting, and he rested his eyes a bit. "They'll find us. Fran can sniff me out, if she's not taking advantage of this time to seduce the Captain."

"She wouldn't."

He laughed. "Ah, Fran's an opportunist. Her loyalty to me is not as great as you might imagine when there's a bulky, handsome Hume in her sights. She likes them all built like our favorite knight."

Ashe was annoyed. "Balthier, why are you telling me this?"

"Pass the time. You have anything more interesting to discuss?"

The Princess sighed, and he felt her shift a little closer. The bottom of her white cloak brushed against his leg. It wasn't that drafty in the room. What was her intention in moving so close then? "Do you know any jokes?"

A disappointment to be sure. He decided to play along. "Only filthy ones. Oh, and I know filthy songs too. Pretty much all filth, all the time. That Archadian educational system is a marvel. Top it off with several years in pirate life, and I'm one filthy miscreant."

She stretched out her legs, her boots scraping along the floor. "I've no doubt. Interesting that you keep your clothes so fastidiously clean when deep inside you're just a dirty boy." He was stunned. "I mean, when you're just full of filthy jokes and everything."

He leaned closer to her, close enough to inhale the scent of her hair. "Did you call me a dirty boy, Princess?"

"Balthier, don't twist my words." He moved closer still. She moved a hand to shove him away and instead her fingers brushed against his face. The Princess moved to snatch her fingers back, but he gripped her hand tightly. "Just because we're alone…"

"You called me a dirty boy, Princess." He could hear her breathing quicken as he held her hand in his. "That may be true. I have been caught gaping at you, but I know that you were taking your leave to stare as well. So what does that make you?" Her hand was trembling, and he shifted slightly to move a hand to her metal-encased leg. Damn those protective gauntlets, he mused. "What does that make you?" He inched his fingers up slightly, passing over the leg guards to the soft skin just between the metal and her skirt.

"We shouldn't do this. Not here and certainly not now." But already, he could feel her moving to grab his hand where it held her other one. She pulled his hand closer to her. "We shouldn't."

"Nobody will know, Princess. We've had a rough few days. Don't you need a little stress relief?" He slid his fingers beneath the skirt ever so slightly, the feeling of her skin just as wondrous as he'd imagined all these weeks.

"Stress relief?" she whispered.

He let his fingers tickle and tease the flesh of her thigh. "Certainly." Her leg was shuddering a bit at his touch, and it encouraged him to continue exploring. He moved his fingers across to brush against her other thigh, and she released a deep breath, the faintest strangled moan catching in her throat at his touch. "Take a sense away, the others are heightened."

"Yes," she mumbled back quietly. And that was when she truly surprised him. His other hand still trapped between the two of hers, she brought it to her face and pressed his fingers to her lips. "Heightened is a good word for it." She pressed small, delicate kisses against the pads of his fingers, giving each one a few moments of attention. He wanted nothing more than to move on to other things, but the darkened room and the soft skin of her thigh beneath his hand was enough to keep him occupied at present.

Ashe's breath was hot against his hand, and it was growing harder to maintain self-control. He wanted nothing more than to lay her down, but she was being so light with her ministrations that it was the most exquisite torture. He pressed against her leg a bit to move them apart further, and she allowed it. Balthier gasped as the Princess took his finger into her mouth then, sucking gently. "Ashe," he murmured, the sensation more incredible than he could have imagined thanks to the darkened state of their current surroundings.

His fingers scooted up her leg, meeting soft cotton and warmth. She moved his hand to pull his finger nearly back out of her mouth, and she began to nibble the tip of his finger. "Who taught you to do that?"

She kissed his fingers again. "Just something I've always wanted to try."

He shifted his weight to slide ever closer to her. "Well, I'd love for you to continue. If I may?" he asked gently, his fingers brushing up and down against her undergarments, and it enticed him greatly to see how damp they already were.

She pressed several kisses against his hand. "You may not."

"Why?"

She took two fingers into her mouth, eliciting a moan from him that he could not control. Her lips closed tightly around his fingers, and he felt his other hand tremble against her. She slowly moved his hand away from her mouth. Her voice was quiet and barely audible to him. "Because I'm not comfortable sitting like this."

"You think the floor is more comfortable?" She shifted to lay on her side. He moved to lie facing her. He leaned as best he could and sighed. "Well, I now have a heightened sense of pain in my elbow and hip, thanks."

She closed the space between them to shut him up, her lips pushing against his. Her hands gripped the cloth of his shirt, and he brought one of his to the small of her back. He pulled her close against him, and she lifted her leg up to rest it on top of his. He moved his other hand to her hip. He let his tongue trail along her bottom lip, and he grinned. "Now may I?"

Ashe breathed out heavily. "You may." Moving down from her hip, he moved the soft material aside and plunged a finger inside her. She gasped against him, her hands tightening against his shoulders as she clutched his shirt. He could barely remember how long he'd wanted to do this, and although he'd never imagined that this would be the place for it, it seemed as good as any. She was warm and inviting, and he loved the way she whispered his name against his lips as he touched her. He increased the tempo of his movements, and she ground herself against his hand.

He seemed to hit something right, and she arched against him with a gasp. "Balthier, oh gods, we shouldn't be doing this…" But even as she was saying it, she was moving her hands to his trousers and untucking his shirt, her fingers trembling as she slid lower to tug at the clasps of his trousers. "We shouldn't be…"

The touch of her hand against him then was almost like torture, and he groaned at the sensation. It had been quite some time, at least by his standards. Following a deposed Princess about cut into one's social life, but he knew that he'd wanted no one else since he'd met her. She was so much more than anyone else he'd been with, and as she let her fingers shakily grasp him, he knew that she was worth the wait. At the very least, he could add "filthy stone floor" to his list of lovemaking locations. He hoped that they'd be able to escape this damned Pharos so he could make it up to her in a real bed, but she was panting against him, and there wasn't going to be any turning back.

"Easy does it, Princess," he muttered. "Do you have a preference?"

"What?" she asked quietly, her voice deepened with lust.

He gently eased his fingers from her innermost depths and tasted her with a grin. "I thought I'd let you decide whose back bears the brunt of this."

She removed her hand from his trousers almost immediately and shoved him over onto his back. He laughed and decided that he could deal with it. Ashe was worth a sore back. "Such a gentleman," she teased lightly, and he moved to take down his trousers. "No, no time. Don't worry about it." Well, he was certainly intrigued. He listened to a gentle rustling beside him, and he guessed that she was removing her undergarments.

He felt her move to lay atop him then, her lips grazing against his sweetly. She hovered over him and moved aside slightly when he tried to pull her down on top of him. "Tease," he murmured against her lips. He let his hands drift up and down her back as she kissed him, and he let his left hand drift to her hip, moving the material of her skirt up. She finally sat up a bit more and guided him into her, and he bit his lip at the feeling of her surrounding him. Definitely worth the wait all this time. He let her dictate the pace for the first few moments since he knew she hadn't been with another man in some time.

"We really shouldn't be…" she moaned as she began to move against him. He rested his hands on her thighs and closed his eyes. She was certainly taking her time and not being able to see her, but simply feel her was already driving him mad. She kept repeating how they weren't supposed to be engaged in such an activity, but she moved against him quicker and quicker. "Oh gods, we can't."

He felt her tighten around him. "We are, Princess," he muttered. "Bit late to turn back, my dear." Balthier bit his lip and decided to demonstrate the truth of his statement. He clamped down on her hips and thrust up into her hard, eliciting a loud cry from her. His back would be in horrific shape, but gods, it felt wonderful. But definitely a bed next time. He'd never heard his name said with the amount of eagerness that the Princess was now demonstrating, and it was enough to bring him to the edge.

She tugged on his vest and pulled him up into a more sitting position, kissing him hard. He pulled her roughly against him, taking a bit of the control back into his own hands since he'd been fairly generous to her thus far. She kept clenching around him in the most distracting way, and he couldn't take much more. She kissed him again and again as he clung to her, grateful that she'd insisted he keep his trousers on the way they were moving against the floor. He did not want to imagine the state of the Princess' knees. But she didn't seem preoccupied with that at present since she was obviously reaching her peak.

The intensity of not being able to see her but feeling her so close was all he really needed. He cried out her name loud enough to surely wake up some long dead beast within the monstrous Pharos, holding her tightly and breathing heavily. She buried her head in the crook of his neck and sighed happily. "We shouldn't have done that. Couldn't just leave well enough alone," she muttered against his skin.

He basked in the afterglow for several moments, not wanting to let go of her yet. He moved his hand to her face, brushing her hair aside and behind her ears. "Well, it's true. We shouldn't have, but I certainly don't regret it."

"Me neither," she whispered back.

She leaned back and looked into his eyes, and he adored the pleasing flush in her cheeks. "Gods, there's no way you'd be able to explain that glow, Princess."

"Hmm?"

"Your face. You're positively beaming." And she was. The way the light cast on her face was one of the most beautiful sights…one of the…most…one of the most beautiful he'd ever. Hmm. The way the light cast on her face?

She figured it out at the same time. "The transport! It's glowing!" And then they both realized it was in fact lit up once more. The entire room was filled with light, and he finally could see her. Her body astride his, her skin flushed and lovely. But her smile faded all too soon. "Wait a moment, if it's glowing like that…"

"…it means someone's using it!" He released her. "Hurry, get your…just hurry!" Of all the things to kill his post-coital happiness, it was untimely rescue operations. Ashe scrambled off of him, pulling her undergarments from the floor hastily. Balthier jumped to his feet and redid the clasps of his trousers as two people materialized in the now well-lit room. Oh please don't let it be him, Balthier thought, please don't…

But it was. Basch and Fran appeared together, and while the Viera seemed to immediately know what had been going on, Basch simply seemed glad to see them again. "Thank the gods we've found you. All of the transports are malfunctioning." The knight moved to Ashe's side. "Princess, are you unharmed?"

Ashe nodded slowly. "Yes, uh…yes, I'm fine. We're fine. We're both just fine." Fran smirked at Ashe's fumbling words, and she shook her head at him as if to chastise him for the behavior she knew he'd engaged in all of a few minutes prior.

Basch nodded. "You both look exhausted…" Balthier let his eyes drift over to the Princess, and she appeared to be at a loss for words. His own mind was blank, his tongue feeling rather heavy in his mouth. Of all the times for a leading man to be speechless…

"No doubt they were looking for a way out, pounding on the walls," Fran offered as an explanation.

"Yes, lots of pounding going on here," he stumbled out, and his partner nearly rolled her eyes at him. Ashe looked away entirely. Balthier rubbed a hand over his face and decided to press on. "Yes, right, so…uh, can we get out of here now?"

"Two at a time. The Princess and I will go first," Basch remarked, a superior glint in his eye. Clearly the man had not known the touch of a woman in some time if he couldn't tell that Ashe was still in an after-sex daze. The Princess stumbled after him, and they zapped their way out.

Fran gave him a dirty look. "Couldn't wait, could you? What if you'd died in here?"

He grinned. "Oh Fran, you wouldn't have let that happen."

She sighed. "I suppose not. But you could at least tuck your shirt back in before we reach the others." Balthier chuckled at his partner, and he did his best to revert to his pre-Princess having appearance before they transported back to the rest of the party. They all decided that stairs would be a better solution and off they went.

His feet ached and his back was stiff and sore, but as he continued up the never ending staircases of the Pharos, he now had a glorious view. For the Princess had added a little bit of a wiggle to her walk as she marched in front of him, and he'd climb a thousand staircases if he was behind her.