Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans.

Author's Note: Hi. These are a lot harder than I remember them being, so only fifty this time.

Well we don't rent pigs and I figure it's better to say it right out front because a man that does like to rent pigs is... he's hard to stop.
-Captain Augustus McCrae, from Lonesome Dove

Five

401) Poison

"Give up or she gets it," Gizmo shouted, referring to the unconscious Titan in Mammoth's grip. "I've got a better idea," Beast Boy replied with a cold smile. "Why don't you two surrender instead, and I'll let you call the hospital." Gizmo looked over at his partner in crime just in time to see him collapse in a heap, releasing their hostage. "And if you ask real nice, I might even tell them what bit you."

402) String

"I don't understand you sometimes," she said to the green kitten as she dangled a piece of yarn around the room with her powers. "Your instincts manifest themselves in an obviously canine transformation." There was a pause as she collected her thoughts and set the toy down, "but you personally are far more prone to exhibiting characteristics more typical of felines." A piteous meow drew her attention. "More unsettling still is your ability to hogtie yourself with eight inches of string when I'm not looking."

403) Bath

Robin didn't know where the toy had come from, but his every attempt at getting rid of the "Bat Duck" met in abject failure.

404) Arithmetic

"If the whole is greater than the sum of its parts," the voice growled to its captive, "then I shall simply have to get rid of one of the parts."

405) Shout

The entire team braced itself for the changeling's "videogame victory celebration extravaganza," each one internally wincing as they heard the immense breath he was taking. Here it came… "yay."

406) Apathy

It was the worst thing he ever said to her: "I just… I just don't care anymore…"

407) Noise

She hated this time of year, when he got like this. "C'mon Raven, get up! It's almost six thirty, you can sleep when you're dead." She burrowed deeper into the comforter, growling "I can sleep when you're dead, you mean."

408) Besmirched

If nothing else, Trigon hated his daughter for ruining his good reputation. What kind of demon lord gets cast out by a whelp one-thousandth their size?

409) Sugar

"By the way, Salad Head, sugar doesn't actually make you hyper." Beast Boy paused in midair, then crashed down to the floor. "It doesn't?" he asked. "Nope. Find another excuse to bounce off the walls."

410) King

"No, Beast Boy, your chess pieces can't revolt, nor can your bishops resurrect the dead." "I just don't get this game."

411) Password

"You would be surprised at how few people will actually guess the password is 'password.'" "That's because nobody is stupid enough to actually do that anymore." "I know, isn't it brilliant?"

412) Rubbish

Cyborg always felt a little weird about upgrading his parts. Every piece of himself he discarded felt like another statement about his disposability. "Dude, just think of it like flushing the toilet!" "Thank you, that was terrifically unhelpful."

413) Walking

Beast Boy blinked at Cyborg. "Dude, the heaviest flying animal I can think of weighs maybe a third of what you do, and it's more of a scavenger than a predator, so it's not really in the business of carrying off prey." "So you can't fly me to the fight?" "You're on your own for that, buddy."

414) Printer

"Please, Robin, what does 'PC LOAD LETTER' mean?"

415) Saucers

It was bound to happen sooner or later, Beast Boy figured. Five teenagers, one bathroom… he was only surprised that it had taken six years for someone to walk in on someone else getting out of the shower. 'Wait… wouldn't Raven's powers have told her I was in there?' Suddenly, his eyes were as wide as the empath's had been.

416) Ambiguous

"Raven, you don't have to try and terrify every girl that looks in my direction, you know." "Just marking out my territory, Garfield." "You were growling at that last one!" "That bimbo was ogling you!" "That bimbo was six!"

417) Breath (1)

The knife hadn't gone in very far, thanks both to his ribs and to the unique fabric of his uniform, so Robin didn't pay it much attention until suddenly he felt like there was an elephant sitting on his chest.

418) Clay

The mud pushed in on him, oozing up his nose and down his throat as he struggled to escape the grim chuckling. He could hear his heartbeat in his eardrums as it beat slower… and slower… and slower… until he couldn't hear it at all.

419) Kitten

"This… this is completely unfair." As Selina visibly struggled with herself, the green cat sitting between her and her prize nonchalantly began grooming its fur. "And I thought I fought dirty," she grumbled.

420) Stars

Star light, Star bright, first Star I see tonight… His parents had never had the chance to teach him about making wishes on stars, but as the girl in his arms giggles shyly, he thinks he may have figured it out on his own.

421) Creature

As his captors made the first incision down his abdomen, Beast Boy tried to suppress his screams. When Raven arrived and saw him on the table, they tried to suppress theirs. Both parties were about equally successful.

422) Handbag

"That's my purse, Garfield, not your… 'chariot.'"

423) Trap

"Yes Beast Boy, we noticed. Now, please stop turning into Star Wars characters and help us figure a way out."

424) Bank

"So… who wants to be the one to break the news to Doctor Light that he's robbing a sperm bank?"

425) Spirit

The world around him faded to black until all that remained was a single pinprick of light in the distance. Then the world shifted, and he felt himself falling towards that growing light. Just before he was sure would land and be dashed to pieces, he felt a sharp yank pull him... not in any direction, but away all the same… and he opened his eyes to see the worried faces of his friends hovering over him. Raven removed her hand from his chest and fiercely locked eyes with him; "I said no."

426) Spinach (2)

"I'm Cyborg the robot man-" "He's made from a garbage can-" "I'll be first to the finish-" "In his dreams, he might win this-" "Cuz I'm Cyborg the robot maaaaaan!" Raven looked over to the two boys playing on the couch. "There is something deeply flawed with both of you."

427) Film

The highlight of every annual Titans gathering was Cyborg and Beast Boy's home videos. Each Titan submitted any and all blackmail material they had on one another and the two edited the collection into a single presentation. The humiliation of each individual piece was nullified by the fact that everyone else would be getting their time in the spotlight pretty soon.

428) Buoy

None of them would fall in front of their friends, and in that refusal, they kept the others afloat.

429) Software

Cyborg's moment of personal triumph—the realization that it was who he was and not what his body was made out of—was slightly tarnished when he realized that he'd referred to his personality as his "software."

430) Grip

It started slowly, so slowly that Raven could merely dismiss her occasional slips as mere figments of her imagination. As her decline steadily advanced, she progressed from denial to concealment from her friends. Eventually, even that failed, and her break from sanity became common knowledge throughout the Tower. "You are being the melodramatic, Raven. It is only Beast Boy."

431) Limitless

Malchior's magic had been too strong for her to overcome, and so Raven watched on helplessly as he first murdered her friends (her family) before moving on to humanity at large. Her only consolation was that, when she willingly brought her father into the world, the dragon would finally suffer as she had… and more.

432) Dock

"That," she said drily, "is coming out of your paycheck." Garfield rolled his eyes at his wife and began cleaning up the glass on the floor.

433) Tray

"It was my understanding, Robin, that consuming breakfast in bed hastened earthly recovery times." Never had the Boy Wonder gotten over the flu so quickly.

434) Audacity

None of them liked to talk about the day that Control Freak nearly took over the city by virtue of wearing a Speedo in public.

435) Leather

Raven watched with ill-concealed amusement as her fiancé struggled with his diametrically opposed reactions to her most recent purchase. When she finally told him it was naugahyde, she barely finished the sentence before he pounced on her.

436) Rhythm

Lubdub. Lubdub. Lubdub. Sometimes, Slade thought he could sit there and listen to his heartbeat forever.

437) Spy

When the team first started, Raven made sure to keep her empathetic senses to herself as much as possible out of respect for her teammates' privacy. As time went on, however, she found herself checking up on them more and more, until she found that she was keeping an almost constant "eye" on their emotional well-being. That was when she realized that she was well and truly stuck with the Titans… and that she wouldn't have it any other way.

438) Robot

Cyborg couldn't understand why, but he was insanely jealous sometimes that Beast Boy was better at doing the Robot than he was.

439) Voodoo

"Garfield, for the last time, you are not David Bowie… and for the love of all that is good and holy, put on some different pants!"

440) Aroma

"ARE YOU HIGH?" Robin shouted at his green teammate, who had stopped mid-battle to start licking a thoroughly confused Starfire. It was all Cyborg could do to stop laughing long enough to point out to an enraged Robin—and curiously enough, an equally furious Raven—that the changeling had been launched into a local pet store's catnip display only moments before his… faux pas.

441) Crash

She hadn't realized what she had just done until she tasted the terror rolling off of Beast Boy: by changing him, she had demonstrated how utterly and completely helpless and powerless she could so easily render him. She had fallen a little in love with him when—still starkly terrified of her—he had knocked on her door later that same day to console her. Years later, she found that she was equally terrified of him, and for remarkably similar reasons.

442) Desert

Sometimes, Jinx felt bad for abandoning her former comrades. Sometimes, Beast Boy felt bad for running away from his former 'family.' Sometimes, Cyborg felt bad for refusing to acknowledge his father. Sometimes, Starfire felt bad for renouncing Tamaran. Sometimes, Robin felt bad for leaving Gotham. Sometimes, Raven felt bad for discarding the strict teachings of Azar. Sometimes… but not often.

443) Identity

"What kind of a name is 'Timid?'" he had asked. And so Beast Boy had spent an afternoon inside her mind (Again!) giving her emotions what he thought to be more "appropriate" names. The hell of it was that her emotions immediately refused to acknowledge any name other than the ones he had given them.

444) Coverage

Of all the things that confused him the most about her, her costume was the worst. Why would someone so body-shy and self-conscious wear such a skintight leotard, of all things? The answer was not at all what he was expecting.

445) Recipe

After her first attempt at cooking put half the team out of action, Raven took Starfire aside and explained to her the importance of using only ingredients found on Earth—after all, there was no way to know how human physiology would react to foods from other planets, and the next time the side effects could be a whole lot more serious than a mere upset stomach.

446) Spade

Slade threw down the newspaper in disgust. The very least they could have done is get his damn name right!

447) Sunburn

As pale as she was, the Titans were surprised that Raven didn't put on any sunscreen when they went to the beach. When it was Beast Boy who came back wincing every time he moved, their surprise doubled.

448) Domain

Joker was Batman's turf. Jump was Titan turf. The Boy Wonder and the Dark Knight glared at each other with an intensity that even unnerved Raven a little. "Huh," snorted Beast Boy derisively, "and I thought I had territory issues."

449) Undocumented

"Dude, you're Ba—mmph!" Robin quickly slapped a hand over Beast Boy's mouth and gave a nervous chuckle. Bruce Wayne merely raised an eyebrow and released the changeling's hand. Someone, it seemed, had neglected to mention Mr. Logan's keen sense of smell to his mentor. The rest of the charity ball went off without a hitch, although Raven found herself a bit envious that Beast Boy got to go home so early.

450) Oath

And I'm not gonna give up until I get you to smile. Of all the broken promises in her life, that one hurt the most.

(1) Sucking chest wounds are Nature's way of telling you to slow down.
(2) Popeye was my hero when I was little. No idea why, especially since spinach is gross.