A/N: This chapter poured out of me so hurray for faster updates!

If she had wanted to sit in a waiting room, Raven would have gone to the hospital or the DMV.

Instead, she was downtown at Jump City Hall waiting for the new mayor to graciously invite her into his office. He'd only been sworn in a few weeks ago but already the space felt noticeably different from when Mayor Borthwick had been the one welcoming her through the doors.

The waiting room was frigid, even for her, and the normal hustle and bustle she'd seen last time had been replaced by a silence fit more for a crypt more than a politician's office. Also, last time Raven hadn't been made to wait.

According to his secretary, a frail, old woman in tweed who was rather uncomfortable with the workings of her computer, he would be free any minute now. He just so happened to be running late due to an earlier rescheduling.

Raven let out another loud sigh into the empty room. The grandfather clocked ticked back at her. It certainly didn't seem like he was very busy, she thought, looking at the unoccupied blue velvet chairs around her.

She didn't like this business of meeting individually with Mr. Morelli behind closed doors. And it didn't exactly feel like he was inviting them in for a cup of tea and a friendly chat. Raven closed her eyes and tried to force her body to relax. She was unusually tense and the lack of a proper night's sleep probably wasn't helping.

The secretary's voice finally came over the grainy intercom. "You're free to go in, dear." About damn time, she thought.

Raven got to her feet quickly, making her way across the room to the large wooden doors. She was just about to wrap her fingers around the bronze door knob when the door flew open in front of her. A small figure rushed out, stumbled into Raven and stutter stepped backwards in surprise.

It took her a second to collect herself, but after shaking off the shock, Raven realized she was staring at the face of the mayor's wife, Abigail.

"Oh, excuse me." Raven said awkwardly. The expression on the woman's face was nothing short of livid. She looked so upset, Raven felt she ought to apologize again.

Mrs. Morelli said nothing and only stopped for a second to adjust the blazer of her severe, black business suit before stepping carefully around Raven and continuing her hurried pace out of the room.

In a matter of seconds, her irritated, pinched face was gone and Raven was left wondering what had rubbed the tiny woman the wrong way.

"Please go in." The secretary called from the room in front of her. Raven shook her head and continued inside where she saw the door to the mayor's office had been left open for her. The secretary smiled at her from behind thick spectacles as she passed by her desk. It felt eerie, though she was sure she was imagining it. Raven had the sense that she was basically alone. It seemed it was just her and Morelli and this senile, old lady who probably couldn't hear worth a damn.

Trying to shake the unease, Raven stepped into the mayor's office.

"Close the door behind you, if you please." A familiar quiet voice said. Raven didn't please but she did so anyway, using her powers to pull it shut quietly. Morelli was seated behind his desk looking very well put together for a man who apparently had a very busy day. His hair was neatly combed back and he sported a dark green suit that complimented his tanned complexion.

There was even a crisp, white handkerchief peeking out of his chest pocket. For someone who had come from very little, he'd certainly adjusted well to a more sophisticated lifestyle. She eyed him warily as she took a seat in the leather chair he'd gestured at as she walked in.

"You'll have to excuse the wait. I was just finishing up lunch with my wife." He told her, smiling at her apologetically. The room did have an unpleasant smell of eggs, Raven noted.

"Yes, I, uh, ran into her as I was coming in." Raven said, remembering the awkward encounter with the angry woman. "Can I ask what this meeting is about?"

Morelli's smile widened. "Of course, I hope I haven't worried you." He said, leaning back into his chair. "This city truly loves the Titans and I wanted to meet with each of you just so we could get to know each other a little better."

Raven only had four people in her life that she was comfortable talking to about herself and even then sometimes she didn't. There was a better chance pigs would fly out of his ass before Raven would tell Morelli anything personal.

"I'm happy to answer any questions I can." Morelli's mouth twitched a little. Was it irritation? Amusement? The man's face was difficult to read and even with her powers as an empath, Raven found his thoughts and emotions strangely elusive.

"Now, no need to be so guarded. I can tell you don't trust me." He said. His dark eyes watched her face as if something there would give him the clue he needed. She felt as if he was treating her like a cornered animal, which, if Raven thought about it, maybe she was.

"How about I tell you something about myself first?" He offered. He extended the palm of his hand placatingly, revealing long fingers decorated with two silver rings. Raven said nothing.

"I know it's hardly fair to compare it, but my father and I didn't get along well either." Morelli began. "He was a real bastard, excuse my language, but sometimes our hardship makes us stronger. Wouldn't you agree?"

Raven was having a hard time controlling her impulse to sneer at him for saying such a thing. Sure, she was tough and scrappy and a bit of a bastard herself, but she was also weak and broken in ways that had become more apparent as she'd gotten older.

"I think if I was offered a normal childhood with normal parents, I'd pick that option every time." Raven told him coldly. He frowned a little and clasped his hands together on the desk.

"Then you'd be just another average human on a planet of billions. You wouldn't have your powers or the Titans. You'd be completely ordinary." He looked rather disappointed at this idea.

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

Morelli pursed his lips. "I suppose it's not. Forgive me for even bringing it up."

They sat in awkward silence for a moment and Raven felt as if Morelli was expecting something from her, but for the life of her Raven couldn't imagine what that might be. If he wanted to see some party tricks she was happy to appease him by levitating around his paper weights.

"I can see you're not the type for small talk." He said, finally breaking the tension. "So I won't waste either of our time." His tone was more brusque now, Raven noted. Clearing his throat, he opened a folder on his desk which Raven had failed to notice when she came in.

"Your main power is telekinesis along with other psychic abilities, is that correct?" He asked her. Raven nodded slowly, feeling more unsure about this version of Morelli. Something had changed like the flick of a light switch. She couldn't put her finger on it but it was clear the pleasantries and charm had been turned off.

"These powers are derived from your demon heritage are they not?" His gaze was on the papers inside the folder now as he spoke. Raven paused for a beat, uneasy about the questions.

"Yes." She answered. He flipped through a few sheets, apparently looking for something.

"You were aware of the prophecy regarding your father Trigon when you came to Earth, correct?"

"Yes, but what is this about?" Raven said, shifting a little in her seat. Why would her prophecy matter now? Was he just trying to get under her skin? Interrogating her like this was only likely to make her trust him less.

"So you understood when you arrived in Jump City that this would effectively be ground zero for the destruction of mankind?"

Raven felt as if the room had suddenly upended itself. She blinked, wondering if she'd heard the man correctly but his face betrayed nothing, none of the emotion that should come with a question like that. Raven opened her mouth but the words weren't there. She couldn't have been more shocked if Morelli had reached across the desk and slapped her in the face.

"Can you answer my question, Raven?" He asked her quietly after a time. Raven shook her a head a little as she tried to make sense of the accusation.

"I wasn't coming to Jump City to fulfill the prophecy." She told him slowly. Raven heard the anger in her voice before she felt it. "I was coming here to prevent it."

"Interesting." He replied, nodding as if she had told him that she preferred to do her laundry on Saturdays.

"Of course there was no guarantee you'd be able to do such a thing. That's the tricky thing about prophecies isn't it? Sometimes you only end up helping them along." He glanced up at her then, making sure he caught her eye.

Ever since Raven was little, she'd noticed that whenever she got angry, the world around her became muffled. She'd hear people talking to her and see their mouths moving but the words would be slow and distorted as if warped by an invisible force. It was one of her warning signs and Raven was experiencing that now in Morelli's office.

"I don't think it would be an exaggeration to call your decision reckless. Though I know Mr. Borthwick is a bit of an optimist for lack of a nicer word." It was clear by his tone that Morelli would have handled her arrival in Jump City quite differently compared to their previous mayor.

"How is this relevant to anything?" Raven said, finally managing to find her voice.

Mr. Morelli furrowed his brow. "It's completely relevant." He said, putting down her file for a moment.

"It's part of my responsibility to the citizens who call this place home to understand exactly what threats we might be facing." Azar help her if she didn't just tear his face off right here and now.

"I am not a threat." She hissed at him. The fountain pen sitting on his desk had begun to rattle and Morelli glanced at it curiously. He said nothing but his calm, collected expression made Raven very self-conscious of her own behavior. She took a quick breath and tried again, remembering Robin's words from their briefing. The pen stilled.

"The situation with Trigon is under control. You need not worry about it." Raven formed each word slowly and carefully, making sure to look him in the eyes as she did. She wanted there to be no misunderstanding about the matter.

"As much as I would like to believe that, it's also my understanding that his influence deeply affects your own powers."

Raven was undeniably his daughter and her darker emotions could certainly bring out an extra pair of eyes to prove it, but it wasn't as if Trigon could control her from across dimensional planes. She'd inherited his power but she was very much her own person.

The fact that Morelli was questioning it at all made Raven bristle. She hadn't grown up in a temple and worked day and night on mediation exercises because it was fun. Raven had trained her whole life to achieve the careful control and balance that allowed her to save lives instead of destroying them.

"My powers are my own. Only I can control them." She told him plainly. Morelli sighed and scanned a few more pages of her file with a skeptical look on his face.

"Except for the times you can't, it seems." He said.

The desk sitting between the two of them was of solid oak construction, obviously sturdy, well-crafted and extremely heavy. It would have been too easy for Raven to send it flying out the giant bay window behind Mr. Morelli. In a hundred other times and places, Raven probably would have done it. Except it boiled her blood to know that she'd only be proving this asshole right.

"Let's move onto something else, shall we?" He said suddenly, as if sensing the hostile intent in Raven's thoughts. The file was shut and slid carefully to the corner of his desk. Then he clasped his hands together again and jumped into his next line of inquiry.

"Can you tell me, are there any ongoing relationships between members of the Titans that would you say go beyond a professional level?" What an awkward question, Raven thought. He was obviously getting at Starfire and Robin even if he didn't want to mention them directly. Of course at this point, Raven had no desire to give this man any information. She had no problem lying to his face.

"If there are, I'm not aware." She crossed her arms and leaned back in the leather chair, daring him to call her out. Besides, there wasn't anything illegal about dating a teammate. Robin was just an extremely private person to begin with and so Star and him had always kept their status as a couple a secret.

"Interesting, there's a lot of speculation on social media." He knew she was being uncooperative which suited Raven just fine. Morelli was wasting his time questioning her about such things.

"Anyone can write what they want on the internet. Do you trust everything you read on social media?" She pointed out. Morelli frowned but nodded in agreement.

"I'm only asking because I'm sure you can appreciate the complexity that romantic relationships can bring to a work environment. Especially in the line of work you and your teammates are involved in." He wasn't kidding which was both hilarious and terrifying to Raven. If he only knew how much turmoil Gar had caused in her life. But the chilling realization was that Morelli certainly wasn't beyond making their personal lives a matter of public debate.

"Personal feelings can get in the way of making the right decision. And with the situations you face, that can sometimes mean life or death." Raven remained stone-faced as he spoke but her fingernails were biting into the flesh of her arms.

"You seem very logical about these kinds of matters so I'm assuming that you have no special relationships with any other members of your team?" His directness startled her. Most of all because she knew Morelli wasn't stupid, so why ask a question that she'd obviously deny? Even if she was involved in something, he shouldn't expect her to admit to it.

"If I'm being honest," she said, looking him dead in the eye, "that's none of your business." Her words were full of quiet intensity. Morelli regarded her carefully, his face giving away no sign of anger or surprise. After a moment, he shrugged as if to say it didn't matter one way or another.

In reality, Raven had surprised herself. In the past, she would have simply lied to avoid suspicion. She didn't care one way or another for the opinions of politicians or the public so long as they left her alone. But perhaps he'd pushed her too far, because Raven couldn't calm the fury simmering in her gut. She didn't want to make an enemy of this man but she was perfectly willing to piss him off a little.

However, Morelli's reaction had disappointed her. He looked more amused by her response than anything.

"Perhaps it's not my place." He agreed. "But these things always reveal themselves in time, don't they?" Raven wasn't sure she liked his meaning.

"And what of it?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Raven, you misunderstand me. I'm only here to be a voice of the people. Their concerns are my concerns." He told her, spreading his hands placatingly.

"Believe me when I say I would take no joy imposing myself on your lives. I need you and your team to protect our city. Making you frustrated or unhappy would be counterproductive, wouldn't you say?"

Well, obviously, Raven thought. But through his politician's speech she understood that he very much intended to impose himself on their lives and he'd take great joy in doing so. If only she could figure out his reasons. That might make him seem more like a man and less like a bored child pulling the wings off of flies.

"Is there anything else you wanted to discuss?" Raven asked, eager to get herself out of the lion's den.

"No I suppose not." Morelli mused, tapping his fingers together. Those silver rings winked at her in afternoon light. Suddenly, Abigail Morelli's irritable mood seemed a little more understandable. How anyone could bear to live with a man like this was beyond Raven.

She stood and Morelli did as well, extending his hand. Unlike at the party, Raven accepted it this time, wrapping her fingers around his surprisingly cool palm. His smile, regardless of his groomed, handsome face, made her think of a snake.

"Thank you for coming today, Raven." He said, giving her hand one more squeeze. "This meeting has been most informative."

Raven was barely a couple steps out of City Hall when a dark sphere of energy swallowed her up to teleport her home. The common room was empty when she arrived with no signs that anyone was around. Dishes were drying on the rack, the Game Station was off, controllers tucked away, and the throw pillows had been carefully arranged on the sofa.

She stood there for a few moments, letting the silence wash over her. Internally, she was screaming.

Raven despised this feeling. She hated knowing that she had to cater to the whims of this man, that he had the ability to reach into their lives and destroy everything they had built. Not just that, but Raven knew he'd be clever about it. He'd make them the ones to blame, twist their words and intentions until they couldn't remember what the truth looked like. She had to hope one terrible person couldn't undo their years of hard work and sacrifice for this city. She refused to believe he could uproot the only family she'd ever known.

And, of all the times for such a thing to happen, she already had Gar to deal with. All those stupid dreams which left her exhausted and all those waking moments spent coping with the complexities of navigating her interactions with him, it was destroying her sanity.

Maybe she wasn't sure what she wanted out of life, but Morelli had no place telling her what she could and couldn't have. That was what burned her up the most. After a lifetime spent denying herself the pleasure of feeling anything, she'd been called reckless, irresponsible and untrustworthy. Her pride could not withstand it.

Before she realized it, Raven was already in the hallway, making her way down the corridor to a room she swore she'd avoid for the rest of her life. She could sense him as she approached, his familiar energy buzzing pleasantly just beyond the wall. Another few steps and she was there, her fist making firm contact on the door. She didn't hesitate this time. Raven pounded on the door until it opened before her.

Gar looked cross. He was busy pulling a shirt over his head, obviously trying to make himself presentable for whoever was urgently banging on his door.

"Hey, just give me a second." He said, pull the fabric over his taut abdomen. Gar must have caught her expression though because a second later he'd stopped fidgeting with his clothing and was staring at her curiously. "Is everything okay?"

Raven said nothing and pushed her way past him into the bedroom. It was dark again, the bed was unmade and there were some clothes in a pile by the closet door. She saw the indent on the sheets where he'd been laying before she'd disturbed him.

The noise of the door shutting behind her made her turn around. Gar was standing there, obviously concerned and unsure about the situation. The last time she'd come knocking on his door it had been about her crazy sex proposal. But if Raven was being honest with herself, that's exactly why she was back again. She wasn't sure when barging into Gar's room and demanding sex had become a normal Raven thing to do, but here they were.

Without saying a word, she unhooked the cloak from her leotard and let it fall to the floor, the dark fabric puddling around her feet. Gar stood there, shellshocked, as Raven reached behind her back to find the clasp at the neck of her uniform.

"Um. Can I help you, somehow?" He asked. It was almost cute, she thought, the way he looked so surprised and disheveled in this moment. And then she remembered how he'd been in the elevator, radiating nothing but confidence and sex appeal. She remembered how he'd pinned her up against the wall and how he'd been doing that every night in her dreams since then.

Finally, after an eternity of fumbling, her shaky fingers were able to unzip her black leotard. She was positively vibrating with frustration.

"Look, I like where this is going, but you're kind of freaking me out." He said, stepping towards her slowly. She stopped to look at him, one arm already halfway out of her leotard.

"Gar." Her voice cracked a little as she said his name. Raven licked her lips and tried again. "Gar, this has been the worst day." She said.

It was hard to tell from his expression in the dim light, but Raven felt his alarm fade, replaced by something else. He came closer, his hand reaching out to touch her bare shoulder, fingers smoothing over the skin. Despite the fact that she was basically stripping down in front of him, the gesture still made her blush.

His familiar scent was overwhelming. She wanted to bury her face in his chest and let her senses drown in him. Even in the shadows, his green eyes arrested her with their depth of feeling. There was so much about this man that pulled at her on an atomic level.

"Let me help you." He said. Raven nodded dumbly, not expecting him to understand. But somehow he did. His warm hands helped her pull off the leotard one arm at a time, exposing her breasts which erupted in small goosebumps as the cool air chilled her skin.

Raven shimmied the uniform over her hips and let it drop down her legs. Then it was just her and Gar, standing and staring at one another, neither of them really grasping the fact that Raven was now stark naked.

She wanted so badly to touch him, to feel the shape of his face in her hands, to run her fingers along his chest and stomach and have the satisfaction of his response. But she hesitated, wondering at her own bravado now that it had gotten her this far.

Was this the real her? Had she been pretending her whole life? She wondered at how she could fit all her emotions so neatly in a box, labelling them, inspecting them like creatures in a zoo as if they were separate from herself. Even rage, as terrible and destructive as she was, had been trained to behave herself.

But these emotions she felt with Gar, they were wildly unpredictable, easily beyond her attempts at logic and reason. She couldn't explain them away or meditation them into submission. In moments like these, Raven felt the terror and exhilaration of truly losing control. It was a freedom she'd never known before.

"Raven?" Her mind snapped back to the present at the sound of Gar's anxious voice. Her hand came up to touch her bare breast as if to assure herself that this was actually happening. Gar watched that hand enviously.

Looking up at him, Raven finally let go.

Her hands found the hem of his shirt and slipped under the fabric to feel his torso. He was wonderfully warm and solid under her cool palms, banishing her fear that maybe this was just another fever dream after all.

At her touch, Gar responded eagerly. He reached down to pull his shirt off and then brought his hand up to cup her face, a thumb tracing hungrily along her bottom lip. She surprised him by pulling that thumb into her mouth, her tongue tasting skin as it slid along the shape of his finger. Raven felt his heartbeat quicken under her hands and heard the agitation in his breathing.

"It's not fair." He said, pulling his finger gently from her lips. Raven stepped closer, her breasts pressing up against his bare chest as she brought their faces only a few inches apart.

"What's that?" She whispered. He was all desire now, she could see it clearly in his face, that hungry intensity and sharp focus that had her pinned at the center of his attention.

"How much I want you." Raven felt his voice reverberate deep in her own chest. Her hands smoothed over the muscles in his arms. He was like a coiled spring, every fiber tense with anticipation, willing her to unleash him.

Her lips parted and she arched upwards to finally close the gap between them, pressing her mouth to his and savoring the familiar pulse of heat that rippled through her body.

Gar pulled her to him tightly, those sinewy arms wrapping around her as he captured her mouth with his own. Her lip sensed the sharp point of a tooth and she shivered thinking of the blurred line between violence and passion.

He was careful with her, even in those moments when the chemicals of lust had them both beyond reason. There was an obvious line drawn in the sand when it came to how Gar handled her and she'd appreciated his gentlemanly attempts at restraint and the careful steps he took with her.

But there was more to this thing called sex. Her body knew it even if Raven couldn't say what it was. On an instinctual level she realized she wanted that unrestrained wildness. This time it wasn't about shutting up her emotions or getting it over with.

She'd made her decision that the best revenge she could have on the world and all the trouble it had given her, was to live as she pleased. Not as a monk without earthly attachment. Not as a demon, letting her anger and wrath get the better of her. But as a woman with her own dreams, as ridiculous as they might seem. She could figure the rest out as she went. But currently, the only thing she wanted was to fuck Gar's brains out.

She pulled away from Gar to look him in the eyes again. His lips were parted, breath coming in short, quick bursts.

"We're doing this." She said. Her words shook him out of his mesmerized state.

"What?"

"You. Me. Us. I've decided we're doing this." She said, trying to clarify in as few words as possible. She was having a hard time thinking about anything other than putting her mouth back on him.

But a grin was slowly creeping over his face and he seemed to be searching her expression for a sign that he'd understood her correctly.

"So, you like me?" He asked. It was such a silly, unexpected question that Raven almost laughed. How could she explain to Gar how much of an anomaly he was in her life? She didn't fully understand the implications of his question herself but it seemed best not to inflate his ego too much.

"I like you enough." She told him, but she couldn't keep the corner of her mouth from twitching up into a small, telltale smile.

Raven yelped as her feet left the ground for a second. Gar had picked her up in a bear hug that squeezed the air from her lungs, making her kick wildly and threaten him much like she used to when they were just kids.

But when her toes touched back down, his hand slid to the small of her back and he tipped her backwards. He leaned over, his lips only a whisper away from her own. There was a devious smile painted across his face, and from his thoughts she could sense a darker, possessive edge to his desire.

"I can work with that."

Sex with Gar wasn't exactly revenge against Morelli. It was a middle finger to her father, her prophecy, and the shitty hand she'd been dealt in life.

After her "incident" last winter that it finally started to dawn on her that maybe there was more to living than just going through the motions. If she was going to be stuck in this world for a while, shouldn't she make a piece of it her own? Maybe it didn't make a difference in the long run, but if that was the mentality of all creatures then man would still be huddled naked in some dark, cold cave, waiting for the end of his days.

When Robin had found her that snowy afternoon, shaking and screaming into the cold air, some part of her psyche had finally had enough. After all, she was still human. Time and loss and death were real to her too. Robin seemed to understand at least part of whatever she was going through, even without asking. It had been clear from her face.

After they'd brought her back to the tower and sat her down on the sofa with a blanket wrapped around her, Robin had asked everyone to leave. Then he sat down next to her, a worried, protective look on his face.

"Are you okay?" He asked. Raven shrugged, staring down at her thighs. She was still numb with shock at the betrayal of her own mind.

"I want you to take two weeks off." He told her. "No missions, no training. Spend it however you want."

"I don't need time off." She said quietly, still not meeting his eyes. "The team needs me. Otherwise, what's the point of me even being here." In truth, the idea of doing nothing for two weeks terrified her. She didn't want to sit alone with her own thoughts, stewing in her self-pity and paranoia. At least the work routine kept her distracted and the physical demands of their job made it easier for her exhausted body to fall asleep at night.

Robin sighed and rubbed his face.

"Raven, you know we need you. This isn't a question of your ability." His voice was softer now.

"Then tell me to suck it up and get my head straight. That's what you do in training." She insisted, almost angrily. But Robin didn't take the bait. Instead her words brought a melancholy expression to his face. Sitting next to her, he suddenly looked very tired and frail. It scared her a little.

"Raven, do you know why you're here?" He asked. She said nothing but the answer felt obvious even if she didn't say it aloud. Where else would she be? Dead maybe, or locked up in Azarath.

"My mentor, arguably one of the greatest superheroes of our time, is also the loneliest, most miserable man I've ever met." Raven looked up at him, surprised. Robin never spoke about his life before the Titans and he certainly kept his feelings about Batman close to his chest. She searched his face, overwhelmed by the strange cocktail of emotions swirling around him.

"There's no absolution in hero work." He told her quietly. "Be a Titan because it's who you want to be. Not because you think you owe the world something."

As Gar held her close, both of them panting in the darkness, she flashed back to that moment and the promise she'd made to herself. She did want a life of her own making, though she wasn't convinced she deserved it, or would ever feel like she deserved it. But this thing with Gar? It wasn't clear if this was happiness or foolishness. But whatever it was, it was warm and exhilarating and, most importantly, it was hers.

A/N: Maybe a bit rambly (I think there might be too many themes going on) but I JUST HAVE SO MANY FEELINGS. Thanks for reading and leave a review if you have a moment!