The Romancer Shadowstep
I worked so hard on this series, what came out of my first fanfiction called The Romancer Onyxbane. So much thought went into this story. What you are about to read below is not just an epilogue. When I decided to make The Romancer Shadowstep the last story in the series, I had to let go of my plans to further the plot. To me, all this stuff was meant to happen to our Romancers, and I didn't want to just let it sit in my head forever. So I boiled everything down into this final piece, for you to read and enjoy how the story was meant to end.
Epilogue: Back to the Romancers... In the future!
Alessandre Mirothalas Shademoon Junior eyed Leilah Springvine as she walked to the Druid trainer in Dolanaar Village. She had pale blue skin and white hair, walked with a definite switch.
"Oh yea, baby, I know you know that I'm watching you." Al smirked. "Oh man, Reaper, I can't wait to ask her to my first Springtime."
Sissimarillion Bane, who hated his name and told everyone to call him Reaper... much to his mother's disappointment, punched his cousin in the shoulder. "Al, you can't ask her! It's going to be my first Springtime too, and you know that I like her."
"Meh. You know better than I do that between the two of us, I'm the better romancer. Why, when my father was my age, he had ten girlfriends and–"
"Stop talking like that! You are not Uncle Alessandre... you're a virgin just like me!"
"Shh!" Al Jr. took his cousin and friend, who already felt like a brother aside. "Not in front of the ladies..."
"Look, I don't think we should fight over her, Al. Mom and Dad told me this story about how when they were younger, one time there was this Human mage who liked him but then mom–"
"Ugh! Is this the same story I heard growing up? Come on, that was way back in the old days, even before the Burning Crusade. Now that's long done. We're gonna be men, Reaper. We have to take this world by storm, we have to–"
Reaper grabbed Al by the collar and shook him. For a novice priest he was pretty frightening. "We're not going to fight over her, you understand me? Now go pick someone else. You're my best friend and I don't want to have to knock your block off."
"Fine, fine," Al wandered off and dusted off his shirt like it was nothing. "Catch you later."
"Don't dare do the Relics of Wakening without me! I need that quest..."
Al waved him off and stealthed. Even though one could see him doing it at this level he thought he was a master spy or something, like his father Triumvir Alessandre.
Al watched Leilah descend the ramp of the treehouse and decloaked right in the middle of the moonwell there when she stopped to check her reflection.
"Hey there... do you want to take the Alessandre to your first Springtime? We could have a great time together..."
Leilah giggled and gave a shy yes.
As one might expect, sleeping with the girl his cousin liked rubbed Reaper the wrong way. He and Al were never the same again.
"Dad! I made up my mind. I'm going to go train in the Human lands."
His mother, Triumvir Wisthera objected to this immediately. "You're too young for Westfall! And no son of mine is going anywhere near those manstealing, lying, lingerie-making Humans!"
Onyxbane put his hands on his hips and shook his head at his wife. They lived in a large treehouse mansion in the Oracle Glade near Darnassus. With all the money his wife was making from being a Triumvir of the Kaldorei Rogue Network, and being a double agent for the Steamwheedle Cartel... whatever game she was running Wisthera told Onyxbane he couldn't know anymore than that, enabled them to have several nice homes. They cleared some land and built this one so that they could be closeby their son while he trained.
"Wisthera, that was thirteen years ago now. You should really let that thing with Willypearl go."
"There! You said that harpy's name! You promised me you'd never say that name in my house!"
Onyxbane smacked his forehead and took his son aside. "Reaper my boy..."
"Sissimarillion! That is his birthname, and yours, or did you forget?"
Onyxbane finally took his son into the next room. The walls were covered with finely crafted blacksmithing projects he proudly kept like trophies. Through an exclusive Steamwheedle Cartel mail order service he could get the materials and recipes he wanted through a catalogue. His wife's fortune certainly helped the hobby.
"Son, I'm proud of you. And I understand. When I was your age, I left Teldrassil too, to go down to the Human lands. I told myself that I was going to become a man but... honestly it was because your aunty and grandmother were driving me crazy. Going was the best thing I ever did because it gave me a chance to come up normally."
Reaper nodded eagerly.
"But son... if you're going because of what Al Jr. did, I think you should try your best and make up with him instead. His father and I fight all the time, but I consider him my very best friend."
"Al Junior is dead to me!" Reaper announced in a booming warrior voice, though he was a priest.
Nextdoor, one could hear his mother Wisthera fretting over this.
Onyxbane scratched through his twin white braids, a hairdo his son also favored, and sighed. "Alright. You can go. But you write us regularly so that we know how you're doing. If you don't write us, you won't get any support from your mother or me... okay? Gold for keeping in contact with us. Deal?"
"Yes sir."
"That's my boy."
Reaper went to go and pack his things. After thinking for a while, Onyxbane got something from his workbench and followed.
"Son? I... couldn't stand to let you go down there without some kind of protection."
"Dad, I tell you all the time, priests can protect themselves. Just because I don't fight like you, a warrior, or in mom's way like a rogue... ugh, I hate rogue-work. Mom's always leaving for Tanaris, isn't she? And keeping so many secrets."
Onyxbane shrugged. "Rogues aren't such bad people. You'd do well to learn that now, before going into Westfall. Lots of rogues down there. But son, I wanted to give you this."
After hesitating, Onyxbane handed him his old Arcanite Reaper.
"But dad! You... love this axe. And now it's practically legendary, with the Burning Crusade over..."
"I always wanted you to have it. And I don't care what anyone says about you being a priest. You're my son. I raised you on this axe and you can fight with it if you want. Don't let anyone tell you different!"
This coincided well with the recent expansion in Azeroth. Beyond racing to the Frozen Throne to face the Wrath of the Lich King, countless soldiers of Azeroth were also merging their classes into other ones like Deathknights. Like the way many famous racial leaders were both one class and another. Battlepriest shouldn't come off too strange. But at age thirteen?
Reaper complained much the same thing to his father.
"You'll do fine. Study well, stay away from those shadowpriests in Stormwind, and you'll do fine. I'll take care of your mother." Then they hugged.
"Onyxbane, I don't care what you said, he is not going!" Wisthera shouted through the house as her son crept to the door with his things, and the Arcanite Reaper strapped across his back.
He heard some of his father's muffled voice from back inside the house. "No, Sara, you aren't going anywhere... come here."
Reaper hurried to climb down the tree before hearing the rest. He was sort of used to hearing his parents get amorous because it happened fairly often, especially when his mother came home from long stays in Tanaris. That was another benefit to leaving home: never ever having to hear that again.
Reaper found Westfall beautiful. Sure it was dry and they still hadn't been able to settle that problem with the Defias his father had told him about, but everything was golden. Lots of peace and quiet. It was hard getting used to being one of only a few Night Elves around though.
He was about to learn, the same way that his father had... that being the only available Night Elf man for miles around had its advantages.
Lady Mae Ella Pontier eyed Reaper as he checked his mail in front of the inn. She and her friends were hanging out near the Flight Master gossiping.
"Who's that?" she asked a blonde Human girl who was holding her purse.
"Oh, him. He's the new kid around here... a priest."
"A priest? A priest! Carrying an old axe like that?"
"I think he's a heroic class..." another girl piped in.
"Is he like, a battle priest of the eightieth level?" Mae Ella boggled.
"No! He's our age. He's soo cool... and look at all that gold he's getting out of the mail!"
Mae Ella narrowed her eyes at the young male Night Elf. "He so is cool. And he's so mine..."
Reaper was only a little shy when the beautiful moca skinned girl tapped him on the shoulder. It was hard for a Night Elf of that age to be completely shy around the opposite sex. Springtimes were designed for that purpose. If you're comfortable with running off into the woods and having sex with a complete stranger and it's socially acceptable for everyone, you pretty much have no trouble talking to a girl afterwards.
"Good Afternoon, Ma'am." he smiled.
"I like you. You're coming to my party. It's at Eastvale Logging Camp." she snapped and one of her snooty gum-chewing girlfriends handed him an invitation. Mae Ella whispered into his ear, "And my parents won't be home at the mansion... See you there."
Reaper had a dumb grin on his face while she and her friends strutted away.
"Dude!" A human paladin ran up to him. "Do you know who that is! You're so lucky!"
Reaper shrugged that he didn't.
"That's Lady Mae Ella Pontier! Her father is only the most famous paladin ever, Sir Elec Pontier?"
Reaper still shook his head. More boys came over. "Her mother pretty much owns all of the Willy's Secret lingerie stores in Azeroth! Even the ones on Outland and Northrend!"
"Ohhh."
"What do you mean, 'Oh?' That's so hot! She's practically swimming in it, and she invited you to this hot party with her cute friends and not even her parents are going to be home in that gigantic mansion! Man! I wish she'd invite me."
Reaper raised both his white eyebrows. "Wow." So his mother had been right about the Humans and their obsession with lingerie. Too bad she'd banned his father from bringing up the whole Willypearl thing. Their son didn't remember the name of the woman who almost kept his parents apart. Reaper had no idea what he was getting into...
The party was wild. Lady Mae Ella, the apple of her parents' eye, had all the servants wrapped around her little finger. They kept bringing them food and wine, and there was loud music. Reaper didn't recognize any of the other guys there, but a young man named Sam saw Reaper's rare axe and befriended him early on in the party. He figured the Night Elf was someone incredibly important. "Lord of Darkshire, Lord of Redridge... well their fathers are anyway." Sam filled him in on the guests. "Everyone here is golden uppercrust of Stormwind society, golden. You've made it to the big leagues." The young man patted him on the back.
"Wow. So... what do I do now?"
Sam smirked. "You kidding me? Just flash your good bloodlines around. That's what these kinds of ladies want to hear. I'll assume that since you were invited in the first place, your parents are famous Night Elves, right?"
"Well, our society isn't like that. Everyone is equal..." he abandoned that notion when he saw how bored his new important friend was getting. "My mom is the Triumvir of Darnassus. And we have lots of houses, mansions, all over the place."
"Nice. Well, you better tell her that. Good luck." Sam slinked away when Mae Ella came and handed Reaper a drink.
"Hey there, Reaper. Glad you could make it."
"Yea, I... did I ever tell you my mom, Wisthera, is the Triumvir of–"
"You're so hot. Let's go to my room and make out."
Of course... considering Mae Ella's lifestyle, that meant a lot of other things too. Reaper was a little surprised at her generosity but he wasn't one to turn it down.
Meanwhile, Al Jr. finally admitted to himself that he felt terrible about betraying his friend.
"Son, you'd better go apologize, before someone gets hurt."
Alessandre and his son were playing checkers outside the tiny cottage they kept in Ashenvale. They weren't as ridiculously wealthy as Reaper and his parents, but the tiny yellow house held some kind of sentimental value for his father and they went there sometimes on the weekends.
His mother Opalbane sat in his father's lap drinking lemonade. Al Jr. was used to seeing his parents like this. Maybe all that overflowing affection is what caused their son to come out so girl-crazy.
"I know... but I can't go all the way to Westfall."
"Why not?" Opalbane asked. She left off sipping her drink to steal a kiss from her husband.
Al Jr. smiled at this and took advantage of the distraction. He loved playing checkers with his father for that very reason.
"King me, dad."
"What? Oh... not again!" he frowned. "You're getting smarter than your old dad."
Opalbane fawned over her husband. "Awww... no, Al you're as clever as you ever were." Opalbane looked up, realizing the name they had in common. "Both of you boys are my favorites, my clever rogues. Anyone want more lemonade?"
Opalbane excused herself, but not before Alessandre pinched her first.
He left off laughing when his wife disappeared into the cottage.
"Son, what you did was wrong." Alessandre got serious.
"But you should have seen Leilah! I really scored with that one."
Alessandre started to chuckle, but then remembered himself. "Err... you really don't want to live that kind of life, I swear. I love your mother so much. If I wasn't wasting my time chasing after all those other women... I think I would have met your mother a lot sooner." he looked off into the distance, wistful. "She was in Stormwind so many times over the years while I was there, and I never met her, hanging out in Cutthroat Alley, picking pockets... if I'd gone to the Cathedral just once–"
"Dad, I'm not like you. I'm actually young, I want to have some fun. You're not really telling me that you hated all that attention, all that tail..."
"Al Jr., don't talk about women that way!" Opalbane admonished when she came back.
Alessandre leaned back and watched his wife as she bent over the table to hand out the lemonade.
Opalbane clucked her tongue. "Look at you! And you wonder where he gets it from." she slapped him in the shoulder with a dishtowel she was carrying.
"Honestly, son, do you want my opinion? What you did to Reaper was so mean. It really was. There is no one in the world to me more precious than my brother,"
"Same here." Alessandre agreed regarding Onyxbane.
"...and you and Reaper are fortunate to have grown up so close. Now, if you want to go find him in Westfall and make up then your dad and I will pay for the trip, so don't worry."
Al Jr. propped his feet up on the table like his father. He folded his arms across his stomach too. It wasn't really on purpose, but it was clear how much he admired his namesake. "Well, alright."
"Good, I'll start getting your things together." Opalbane wandered back into the cottage. "I hope you have enough clean underwear..."
"Mooom! You're embarrassing me infront of dad."
Alessandre chuckled. "Good, I'm glad you're going to do the right thing, Al." He removed his feet and leaned over the finished checkers game. "But I got one word of advice for you."
"Yes?"
"Stay away from those dirty druids and stay away from Cutthroat Alley! You understand me, boy!"
"Yessir." Al Jr. snapped to attention.
"And no more telling people that you are a rogue and a druid, like me! You aren't a heroic class and it's dangerous... I already hate that, after that stupid investigation regarding the Archdruid in Silithus, that everyone now knows that about me in the first place."
Al Jr. reluctantly promised that he would.
Weeks later, when he saw Lady Mae Ella Pontier waiting on the docks at Menethil Harbor, he completely forgot about the advice though.
"Hey there." he winked at the young woman.
Mae Ella rolled her eyes at him. She was going and he was coming. He watched her get onto the ship, alone. It reminded him of a certain story his father told him once long ago... about a lone woman he found waiting on a ship to Darnassus...
Al Jr. scratched his jaw, thinking about it. He had to trek to Ironforge and then to Stormwind to find Reaper. But this was a once in a lifetime opportunity.
"Did you know," Al said as he jumped onto the ship back to Darnassus at the final moment, "That feral druids have more stamina?"
Mae Ella laughed a little and walked across deck into the empty cabin. "Do they really? That sounds weird. You're kinda cute actually... what's your name?"
"Alessandre, as in the Alessandre? My dad is Triumvir of Darnassus." he followed and sat on the bed beside the Human girl.
Mae Ella, despite her kindly mother and her paladin father, had come up extremely rebellious when it came to certain things. This very handsome young man with dark purple skin and a mane of full white hair was not just available but now he was also rich and famous.
"I had a fight with my parents after I threw this party at the mansion... I'm going to train in the Night Elf lands, away from them."
Al Jr. sidled up next to Mae Ella in the empty cabin of the ship. "Hey, beautiful, I understand." then he yawned and wrapped his arm around her. "Looks like we're alone... wanna see what a man with the strength of a rogue and a druid can do?" Why explain that his father was actually the one who was part-druid?
Mae Ella, who really needed a good heart to heart with her mother regarding her easy nature, regardless of her mother's famous lingerie stores, simply shrugged.
"K. If not we'll be super bored alone on this boat anyway."
That was all the encouragement Al needed to start making himself a legend like his dear old dad.
Months went by, and the family was finally able to convince the boys to get back together. It was in the guise of a family reunion that summer. Surprisingly enough, It had been Shadowstep's idea. He wasn't the Master Rogue anymore, but he still seemed to have a few tricks up his sleeve.
At Wisthera's second enormous mansion in the wilds of Ashenvale, the whole family was outside relaxing and enjoying themselves.
Reaper and Alessandre had fought earlier, but that turned to playing around. Now they'd gone off hiking together.
"Master Rogue, you old dog... how did you know this would fix everything?" Alessandre walked over and patted the man who felt like his father-in-law on the back.
"Aw... so nice of you to call me that, Al, but it's been a long time."
"Not long enough. Now I know why you handed this job over to me so easily. Wish I could give it back." he joked.
He and Shadowstep laughed together. Onyxbane began to deal them their cards. "How come I keep losing? I think it's because I'm playing against two rogues, you manipulative bastards..."
"Onyx... I'm still a rogue, remember?"
Onyxbane quickly apologized to his wife. "The way she does it though, I don't mind." he told Alessandre and Shadowstep who started laughing even harder.
Priestess Feathershine sat with Opalbane at the far end of the wood table, playing checkers.
"Oh, to see everyone sooo very happy, just like one big family." Feathershine smiled.
Of course Opalbane was playing the black pieces. That sort of color still appealed to her. "Yes, it's nice isn't it? I'm glad your Shadowstep suggested it. He really seems to have come around."
Feathershine beamed. "Oh! I adore him. He is always thinking of me. Everyday for lunch he brings in fresh flowers from Feralas to set the table, just for me. Such a sweetheart."
Opalbane slid a piece across the checkerboard, then waited. "You two... should probably just get married after how nicely everything's been going where you live together in Feathermoon Stronghold... right?"
Feathershine shushed her. "No! I don't want to go that far."
"But you've been practically living like it."
"I really don't want to have children... I couldn't at my age anyway. And I don't want to disappoint Jebidiath."
Opalbane blinked. "Why? How could you ever disappoint him? I've never observed a man so in love, especially at his age."
Now, Feathershine and Shadowstep were almost a hundred years old. They still looked fairly young though, like people in their fifties, since they were Night Elves.
"You know what I mean... I see how you and Alessandre get along. I was too afraid before, after that business years ago in Orgrimmar," she whispered, "And now I'm just too old, simple as that. I'd feel like a fool if... if he rejected me after all these years."
Opalbane frowned. "Mom... you shouldn't talk about yourself like that. Everyone deserves a bit of happiness. Look how I came out."
A noise came from down the hill. People were arguing loudly in Common.
"What the–" Wisthera started. She was grilling deer meat on a spit over a campfire. "I don't remember inviting anyone else... and this is private property."
"I'll take care of it," Onyxbane got up and pulled one of his newest creations, a twin bladed axe made of Khorium out from under the table.
"He keeps those things like pets, I swear." Alessandre whispered to Shadowstep. Shadowstep had reached across the table and was looking at Onyxbane's cards.
"You old dog..." Alessandre started laughing.
"Hey, don't look at me like that. We planned to swindle him like this..."
"Onyx, wait! I think it's... um... Willypearl." Opalbane winced. "I invited her."
"You WHAT!" Wisthera started swearing.
Back in the woods, Reaper and Al Jr. looked at each other. "What in the heck is she doing here!" they both said together when they peered through the trees at the Human family coming up the path.
After figuring it out, they each agreed not to say a word. They spit into their palms, shook hands and swore allegiance once and for all.
Opalbane rushed over to meet her best friend. It had been years since they saw each other last. That was a shame too, because it turned out that they both got pregnant the same year, thirteen years ago. Their son and daughter could have grown up together.
Willypearl flashed a kindly smile.
"So good to see yall again! Hi Onyxbane!" she said in her Westfall accent.
Her husband, Sir Elec Pontier looked very solemn beside her. Mae Ella had her arms nervously crossed over her chest. All of them were dressed in finely tailored outfits.
Onyxbane timidly waved. Wisthera was swearing loudly, then glared at her husband.
"You'll have to excuse my family, dears... we all had a little tiff before comin' out here. After Mae Ella," Willypearl furrowed her brow at the mention of her daughter's name. "Ran away from home a few months ago, it's never been the same."
"Mom! Don't tell people that!"
"She wouldn't have to tell people that you were a runaway if you didn't keep trying to do it, and so therefore make it necessary for everyone within range to keep an eye on you, young lady!" Elec carried a purple Khorium mace these days that Onyxbane smiled dumbly at.
"Hey Elec... you want to play some cards with us?"
The Human man blended in well at the gathering after that. Opalbane struggled to make her old friend Willypearl and her daughter feel at home, but Wisthera kept hovering around and mumbling words like 'harpy' and 'homewrecker' under her breath.
Willypearl politely ignored the crazy rogue woman.
Finally, Opalbane offered them both wine.
"No thanks." Mae Ella turned up her nose.
"Darlin'... she's just tryin' to be nice. I thought you would be happy here in Ashenvale, after you ran off and we had to come catch you. Now you can enjoy the pretty purple forest and the Night Elves..."
"I said I don't want any stupid wine!"
"That's rude! And don't talk to me that way! Opalbane is our hostess, just drink the damn wine!"
Across the table, Elec apologized to the guys and started getting up...
"I can't!"
"Give me one reason why not!" Elec slammed his fist on the table.
Wisthera had called the boys back in from the woods and started to fuss over them to distract herself.
"Cause I'm pregnant!" Mae Ella flared, then covered her mouth. "It might... hurt the baby."
Al Junior and Reaper yelped.
Alessandre and Onyxbane looked at their sons and got it instantly.
"One went down to Westfall and came back bragging about this rich girlfriend of his, and the other takes a round trip on a boat to Menethil Harbor and comes back bragging about a rich girl he met." Shadowstep observed and raised an eyebrow at Wisthera who looked confused. "You're the criminal mastermind, you do the math."
"Sissimarillion Reaper Bane!"
"Alessandre Mirothalas Shademoon Junior!"
Loud argument ensued. Willypearl wanted to know how, after she went halfway across the world to start her family without the intervention of the crazy Night Elves, they managed to find her daughter and get her knocked up. Wisthera heatedly put in that Mae Ella was clearly a slut like her mother who owned all those tacky lingerie stores. Opalbane was furious with Wisthera for maligning her Human friend's family, and then jumped on Willypearl for letting her daughter parade around Azeroth like that, tempting upstanding young man like her son.
"The son of a cultist and a criminal! Surrre, honey, he's upstandin'!" Willypearl flared.
The men stood aside, afraid to intervene.
Elec covered his face. "My daughter... how many lectures on the Light did I give her? But noo, she'd rather be a mage like her mother. And then Willypearl had to go and spoil her. Do you know she lets that girl pay other people to finish her quests?"
Alessandre and Onyxbane had got their sons by the arms.
"Do you see what you've done! Now we're going to be related to them." Alessandre whispered harshly to Al Jr.
Onyxbane scoffed at this. "Willypearl's not such a bad person! I'm more worried about you becoming a father way before your time, Reaper. Do you know what your mother and I went through to have you? You aren't ready!"
Priestess Feathershine eventually made her way over to the retired Master Rogue Shadowstep. She gave him that old pleading look. He didn't look too surprised to see it.
"Family meeting!" Shadowstep announced and beckoned all the romancers over to the long wooden picnic table. Elec and Willypearl were more than happy to have a private moment with their deviant child.
The parents began to fight over whose son came out worse. Al Junior and Reaper were too smart to help along or hinder either case. They kept their mouths shut, and looked at Mae Ella at the other end of the long table, terrified.
"Look, there's only one way to settle this." Shadowstep said calmly. A certain adventure into Horde lands thirteen years earlier encouraged everyone in his family to calm down and listen. Feathershine rubbed his shoulder lovingly and gave a hopeful smile.
"All of these young people need to learn a lesson. I suggest we don't wait until someone runs off and becomes a cultist," he eyed Opalbane, "or a pervert," he eyed Onyxbane, "a con artist," Wisthera was the obvious choice for that accusation, "or an outlaw because of it. Now, I didn't say shame of the family because we settled that long ago with Shia'jin. Nobody here is to be ashamed of the place they have in this family. Just ashamed of their stupid, stupid actions!"
Somehow, Shadowstep had turned himself into the patriarch of the family in a matter of moments.
"What should we do, Master Rogue?" Wisthera worried.
"You're asking me this? It's more than obvious." He pointed a finger in both the teenage Night Elves' faces. "You have to accept responsibility for your actions with that young woman. Each of you is going to marry her."
"WHAT!" all the parents flared at once.
"Only the Humans won't know that it's not an actual marriage. Wreathe Day ceremonies can look very similar to a wedding if you ask me. They'll think their daughter is getting security, but under Darnassian law, it will only be for a year... long enough for that kid to come out and for us to see if it's an elf or not. If it is, the two of you are screwed. But that's only fair, because you did it to yourselves anyway for acting so carelessly." he shrugged. "If not, then you're off the hook."
Feathershine nodded though Onyxbane, Wisthera, Alessandre, and Opalbane fretted about the solution, and said, "It's nothing less than what would happen anyway, a waiting game. But this way, you two get to learn responsibility while you're at it." then the retired Priestess of Elune narrowed her eyes at the two young men. "And it's impossible to get a woman pregnant while she's already pregnant, so even with those immoral hormones of yours, even you two can't screw it up! I say it's a fitting penance!"
When the Night Elves offered to take full responsibility for their sons' actions, Willypearl and Elec were relieved. The prospect of having their daughter live in an isolated little cottage in Ashenvale, away from the glittering temptations of a wealthy lingerie fashionista, was appealing too. And of course, having to live with two teenage boys would certainly humble Mae Ella towards her eager pursuit of the opposite sex. Elec and Willypearl secretly decided that it would only be until the baby was born and they could see whether or not it was a Night Elf. No one was going to get any of their family money or be living in the family mansion causing a scandal until that part was at least settled.
Shadowstep insisted that Opalbane be the one to do the ceremony, instead of Priestess Feathershine. Elec and Willypearl couldn't accuse them of lying later if an official Priestess of Elune didn't preside over the ceremony in the first place.
Alessandre Junior was crying when he put the wreathe of wildflowers on Mae Ella's head. Reaper tried to remain as calm as possible but when he put his wreathe of dandelions–he was left with no other option than to make one of weeds since his friend and cousin already got hold of the more conventional flowers–on Mae Ella's head also. The two boys would have run away from the whole thing if not for their angry warrior and rogue-druid fathers watching them collect materials to make the wreaths in the first place.
Right after they both said 'I do', something occurred to Reaper and he became distraught. "Wait... isn't this some kind of incest?!"
His family members all crossed their arms and growled at the two boys. Incest was saving the day... sigh, a third time.
Then two more uninvited guests showed up.
"What's this! Illegal gambling?" Triumvir Myrielle eyed the pile of gold near the interrupted card game between Elec, Shadowstep, Onyxbane, and Alessandre. Master Rogue Stanley the Steamer stood next to her, grinning. "And a mass wedding?"
"She's not a Priestess of Elune..." fellow Triumvir Alessandre growled to his coworker in warning.
"At the least, knowing Opalbane, it's probably some cultist ritual that's also against Darnassian law... But that doesn't matter. I came here to bust you two, and I see that I was right to do it! This is a circus of lawlessness coming from my own colleagues! Neither of whom are fit to lead the KRN!"
"Me? What did I do?" Wisthera panicked.
"This house... is ten times over the kaldorei limit. Tell me, did you cut trees to put it here, in Ashenvale? That's against the law! And what self-respecting Night Elf would do that kind of labor and destroy our beautiful homeland. I don't know what you're doing over in Undermine, Triumvir Wisthera, but I bet the Steamwheedle Cartel helped you set up your house, bought and built on blood money, am I right?"
Wisthera sputtered stubbornly, then settled on, "Screenshots or it didn't happen."
That's when the Steamer came forward, brandishing his newest invention. He clicked a button on the top of the little black box and it flashed. A small piece of paper came out of a slot at the front. A picture of Wisthera's oversized house, the mass wedding, and the illegal card game were captured perfectly on glossy paper.
"I call this the photographic channeller... the latest technological evolution in spy-work." he grinned evilly.
Alessandre stepped forward and sneered at Myrielle. "You've been planning this all along, haven't you? You knew that we were having a family reunion this weekend... you chose to come up here right now, to do Wisthera and I in, once and for all. But why? The three of us Triumvirs have served the KRN well together over the last thirteen years. I settled the corruption scandal among the druids still in Silithus, Wisthera followed in your mentor's footsteps and broke the Steamwheedle Cartel case wide open... she even avoided the international repercussions by agreeing to become a double agent over it. The work she does in Undermine to represent the interests of Darnassus is critical to the survival of the Alliance, the stability of Azeroth even."
Myrielle frowned at him. "And what is my claim to fame, after all these wonderful years watching you and Wisthera get all chummy and seize more and more power from me, the more popular you get with Darnassus? I went down to Ironforge and cleaned up your messes, got the King of Ironforge and Mathias Shaw over in SI: 7 in Stormwind to trust the Kaldorei Rogue Network again. What I did made it possible for both of you to do your important work. But nooo, Myrielle Fadeleaf is the least popular Triumvir. No one cares that she risked her neck and almost ruined the love of her life just to get her colleagues on track. Everyone just loves the criminal mastermind and the assassin... but never the patriot! Well, it's high time you and Wisthera paid your dues!"
Alessandre yelled with frustration. "What are you going to do, Myrielle! There's no jail in all of Darnassus big enough to hold this entire family!"
Never doubt the wrath of an ex-girlfriend.
Myrielle remembered well the secret dungeon Priestess Feathershine described that existed within the trunk of Teldrassil. Though it wasn't as bad as the Priestess of Elune described. The insane Sentinels who escorted them to their large family-sized cell were delightfully mad, in that they actually liked their job.
They grinned whenever a prisoner did something wrong. They liked seeing to it. Alessandre cautiously observed for his other family members that it meant the crazy Sentinels probably enjoyed torturing their prisoners too. Their cell was across from one where a corrupted ancient tree giant sat behind bars, mumbling about burning things.
"This sucks! Why do we have to sit in here!" Al junior complained.
His father Alessandre, Opalbane, Onyxbane, Wisthera, Willypearl, Elec, Mae Ella, and Reaper sat dejected against the three cold walls. The last and fourth wall was all bars.
Elec, a paladin of the Silver Hand, had completely lost heart. "Between my daughter marrying out of wedlock and my being convicted of unseemly things and thrown into a Darnassian jail... my good family name is finally ruined." his shoulders shrugged as he whimpered.
"They... took my axe." Onyxbane worried.
His son knelt next to him, a more youthful version in everything except for the white priest's robe he wore. "They took my axe too, dad." he patted his father's back.
Alessandre had turned himself into a purple nightsaber and was pacing up close to the narrow bars as if he were caught in a trap. "Urge to kill... rising..."
Opalbane sighed. "Come here, Al honey. I think it's time for your therapy."
"His what?" Willypearl's eyes got wide.
"Shadowstep helped Alessandre find a therapist after we got married. A kindly druid woman–you'd like her, Willy–who understands his emotional problems that arose when the Archdruid in Silithus tried to destroy his mana." This was common knowledge in the Alliance now. The work Alessandre did as Triumvir in Silithus forced his long held secret to come out in the open. Far different from what Alessandre anticipated, it just made him more popular with the ladies because now he was proven to be truly half-animal as well as a mysterious rogue. And what with the heroic classes starting up...
"Can I... pet him too?" Willypearl peered across the long cell where Alessandre lay purring with his purple furry head in his wife's lap. She gently scratched him behind the ear.
Wisthera and Opalbane flinched together. "NO!"
A familiar voice carried up from the cell just beyond the one with the crazy ancient in it. Alessandre was the only one who understood the raspy Trollish.
"Shai'jin!" the purple nightsaber Alessandre raced back to the bars.
Onyxbane, Opalbane, and Wisthera rushed over to see too. It was an odd angle, but they could just barely make out their long-lost blue Troll relative, and the waving hand of a green Orc woman.
"Pasha be here wit' me too." Shia'jin told them. Alessandre translated for his family. Elec and Willy gave them strange looks for talking to what sounded like members of the Horde and decided they didn't want to know what was going on.
"How have you been! We haven't seen each other since... well, it's been thirteen years! How'd you get in here?" Alessandre asked.
"I be good mon, and Pasha too. Well, it be a long story, but basically we got caught killing Night Elves in the starting area."
Only Shia'jin's strange family members seemed to understand, though Willypearl and the others looked horrified. Back when they first met, Shia'jin explained to them that because of the Old God Zar'teaus' curse, he and his family members swore to shed no Night Elf blood. That sort of made he and his Troll family members outcasts among the Horde, ontop of already being Darkspear Trolls living in Durotar with Orcs. But, after the curse was lifted, he was finally free to enjoy being a member of the Horde in every way.
"Good for you!" Opalbane cheered. Unlike his ex-cultist sister, and his ex-convict wife, and his ex-psycho murderer brother-in-law, Onyxbane had no creepy history to back up that congratulatory feeling. He rolled his eyes. Next, Alessandre asked on behalf of everyone, "Where's Faltheriel? Did you guys..."
Shia'jin shrugged from what they could see. "He was real good for me mon, at first. When I was just comin' out of da closet and needed some more confidence. Den it became clear that Faltheriel really was crazy. And he never did tone down all dat flirting. We stayed friends after the break up though. It a funny story, actually. A few years after we be friends he come in real excited one day and tell me dere was dis work celebration where dey had a communal marriage. So he a married man now, more or less."
Opalbane, who had almost been fooled into marrying Zar'teaus himself, raised a white eyebrow and said, "Ewww..."
"Ya was part of some 'corporate merger' Faltheriel said. He so weird. He wanted to do it, and ended up with like twenty wives and husbands from the Twilight Cultists, the Burning Legion, the Shadow Council... you name da crazy group of bad guys, dey in dere somewhere. Last time I talk to him, he seem really happy too. And you know what, for once he not flirt wit me or Pasha. He must really feel betta after all dese years."
After Alessandre managed to explain between his disturbed looks, Opalbane and the others started laughing. Yep, that sounded just like Faltheriel all right. Alessandre asked how Pasha was doing next.
"I found another Tauren hunter who had his head on straight, this time. That was long after Shia'jin convinced me to stop going to Club Thrall on Fridays though."
The Night Elves had no idea what the Club Thrall thing meant, and there was no way Alessandre was asking.
Pasha continued, "My sister and her boyfriend are still in Outland, but wearing epic arena gear. I decided for myself that it was morally wrong to continue pursuing my epic bow quest considering... Uh... that I have such nice gear already, and it truly isn't fair for a level seventy hunter to go through all that... Well, other than that, I have a little girl at home. Baby the pig died and we ate him. Took a whole week to do that. The week right after that, Shedevil had a bunch of puppies. For some reason that I can't explain, we wanted to call all of them Tanuki, so we did. I think I'll be breeding black Worgs from now on instead instead of pigs."
Alessandre translated once more and everyone cringed at Pasha's strange way of being a hunter. No, she had not changed at all either. Alessandre began telling Shia'jin about their sons, and how Feathershine and Shadowstep were now getting along.
While the others were catching up, Mae Ella who was starting to realize that it was going to be no fun raising her baby behind bars, and so came to the conclusion that having sex with various people so carelessly hadn't been such a good idea either, perked up beside her mother.
"Speaking of that Shadowstep guy... where is he? And Feathershine? Wasn't he gambling too?"
Alessandre and Wisthera sat up instantly from their conversation with Shia'jin and Pasha. "That bitter old bastard! He planned this whole thing!" they concluded together, and started banging on the bars to be let out. Pasha and Shia'jin yelled too, said that they were on vacation and that this wasn't unusually shabby treatment. Then, they confessed to Alessandre and the others that their old guild members were coming to get them out later and they should stand clear of the walls when they started hearing things explode upstairs. With very disturbed looks, the Alliance members of Shia'jin's family retreated back into their cell.
Thousands of miles above their annoying screaming relatives, retired Master Rogue Shadowstep and retired Priestess Feathershine sat before the quiet moonwell in the Temple of Elune in Darnassus.
Triumvir Myrielle Fadeleaf and Master Rogue Steamer stood nearby.
"Thank you for doing this one last favor for me, Myrielle." Shadowstep thanked her. Priestess Feathershine had finally learned of Shadowstep's plan. He'd just explained it to her, but it still didn't make sense and she was worried.
"No problem boss. Honestly, working with Wisthera and Alessandre isn't so bad, but they really do get too chummy sometimes. The triumvirate was getting lopsided, and I could really use this down time to balance things again. I'm glad you included me in your plans, whatever your reasons."
Stanley smiled too. "And Jebidiath... I guess we're even now. I needed to get revenge on those two, after you made me a laughing stock in front of the other Master Rogues. It was fair enough after I got Myrielle to usurp your power, but I never expected to lose face like that. Now I can go back to Ironforge after thirteen years of emasculation and humiliation..." he sighed with relief, "and do my work in peace."
Feathershine still looked quietly off into the distance. Shadowstep turned to her. "Enjoy your vacation, you two. But don't get carried away, like I did on my Wreathe Day. Treasure the time you have with the one you love." he rubbed Feathershine's back.
Myrielle and Stanley bid them goodbye and took hands. It would be a working vacation, but if they could spend at least that much time together to unravel a bit of Wisthera and Alessandre's corruption over the last decade or so, then they would make the best of it. The tall breathtaking woman and the short clever rogue left the temple and strode out into the daylight, smiling.
"We're married?" Feathershine asked Shadowstep again. "After all this time... we've been husband and wife? I thought... you said that you wouldn't trick me anymore."
"Yes I did. And I kept my word, Deliah, despite what you may think. Not only was that hardly veiled wedding ceremony High Priestess Tyrande gave us more than obvious, I told you afterward that I would tell you what I was up to, when you were ready." he took her hand. "Your relatives are far, far away, in a controlled environment where nothing bad could possibly happen to them. They are, one hundred percent, safe and sound. Nor can they influence your thinking by your going to them and asking them their opinion of me and my actions. It's not about making them happy anymore Deliah."
She hugged her bare arms. She was beautiful looking into the Moonwell, though she seemed too upset to realize it.
"Now that you know the truth, all of it, what do you think Deliah? You are my wife. That is the way I've always wanted you. I've done everything in my power over the last thirteen years to give you the life I always hoped to have with you. Are you happy to be my wife, at last? I've fixed it so that you can finally feel comfortable enough to tell me what you think, no guilt, no regret, no family influence whatsoever."
Feathershine wiped a tear from her eye. "But we can't... we waited too long to have children."
"Deliah, honestly! Do you really think I want to have kids! Yours are more than enough trouble."
"But I thought you wanted a perfect woman, a pure Priestess of Elune! I'm just... well, me. And, now I'm getting wrinkles."
"They're cute wrinkles... at the corner of your eyes," he kissed her lips, "and your mouth. It's you who I want as my other half, my companion for life. I had to be a little devious to do it, to make sure we didn't waste any time while I figured out a plan to make this all happen for real. In the end, I decided to do the wedding first in secret, and then afterward, take however many years necessary to maneuver the proper pieces into place. Do you forgive me for being so bold? Do you want me as your husband?"
Feathershine touched him timidly at first. She looked around them, but her family wasn't there. She couldn't let them down, and it was impossible for them to be disappointed. The best part was... thanks to Shadowstep it was not too late. It never had been. Something inside the conservative priestess snapped and she jumped on her lover. They fell into the moonwell groping each other.
"Yes! I love you, I'm crazy about you! I can't believe you did this for me, it's so romantic, so rash! Like we're teenagers again!" Bright blue water splashed all around them.
Shadowstep couldn't speak, he was so happy to have all her attention at last. He accepted her kisses gratefully, began to undress her...
Stories above them, a novice priestess named Luna bowed before High Priestess Tyrande Whisperwind.
"I've done everything you've ever asked of me, High Priestess Tyrande, and more. I went out of my way to even heal an injured squirrel and an ant I found on the way to the temple, besides finishing my quest to heal that injured Sentinel in Dolanaar."
Tyrande scrutinized the novice Luna. This rose skinned and green-haired young woman looked very familiar.
"Why do you want to be a Priestess of Elune, child? Tell me honestly."
The young woman thought. "Well... my mother Windsong is a priestess. She was able to do a lot of good for the world. I want to help everyone that I can, and make the world a better place too. Besides, all the other soldier classes are inferior to ours. We are truly purehearted and honest. We clearly see the wrong in everything and make it right–"
"Have you got Lady Sathrah's spinarettes?" Tyrande interrupted the girl. The sounds of splashing and muffled excitement behind them might have interrupted the novice first but Tyrande was fully aware of what was going on. She intended to use it as a lesson.
"Yes, but that is a quest I have to turn into Priestess A'moora..."
"Nevermind that. I want you to go down to the moonwell, right now, and cleanse the spider's remains in the holy pool. Then come back and tell me of what you saw. Afterward, I will reward you myself."
The priestesses and Sentinels beside Tyrande tried not to laugh too much when they heard the moaning below them in the moonwell stop, then panicked yelps, and finally a poor young girl's frightened scream.
The novice came skulking back before Tyrande, her eyes wide.
"Now... about what you saw. Did you find anything wrong with it?"
Luna blushed. "It was horrible! To defile a moonwell like that, in the temple of Elune of all places! Those people... have they no regard, no respect for sacred things? It was vile!"
High Priestess Tyrande knelt before the girl. "The woman you saw, was Priestess Feathershine, one of our most obsessive priestesses and retired for a good reason. She trained your mother Windsong you know."
"She did?" Luna gasped.
Tyrande placed a hand on the girl's shoulder. "There is nothing wrong with what those two are doing. Love is not so black and white, especially powerful, passionate love like theirs. It's curious, really... priests and rogues or... I guess in at least one situation, feral druids, make such explosive combinations. They seem to capture every aspect of life, the wild and the tame perfectly, like a tiny spectrum reflected off a water droplet caught in a spider's web."
"I... I don't understand, priestess?"
"No, few people understand Malfurion and I, or Shadowstep and Feathershine, Alessandre and Opalbane, or even Onyxbane and Wisthera. But I do. However imperfect love is, it is still beautiful and we are lucky if we can find it in our lives. Sometimes, we have to even become romancers, and claim it for ourselves."
"So... what is my reward?" Luna wondered next.
Tyrande smiled at her. "I am about to save you a lot of trouble, novice Luna. You are too much like your mother Windsong and that overbearing Priestess Feathershine who trained her. I wasn't sure at first when I heard that you were coming but then you failed my little test. There is no way I'm letting you become a priestess. You're far too lofty and obsessed, the way Feathershine was when she first came to me."
"WHAT?! But that's not fair! I already made the choice."
"Policy change. And you can tell your twin brother, son of your father Vermillion–that failure of a rogue--that I don't want him going anywhere near the Kaldorei Rogue Network." she handed the girl two slips of paper. "These are your referrals to the Warrior's Terrace. Darnassus needs more of those." she stood and smiled ingenuinely at her. "Now, good luck with your life and have a nice day."
Little Luna whimpered, and walked away.
A Sentinel nearby wiped sweat from her brow. "You sure can spot them, High Priestess! Do you think this new policy of screening new rogues and priests will work?"
"Of course it will. Unlike certain rogues and or druids and priestesses I just mentioned, and their spawn, I know what I'm doing. We don't need anymore Feathershines or Shadowsteps in this world."
"But aren't they in love and together? They seemed to get that part right, while you... I mean, isn't your Malfurion far off in another realm, imprisoned by Illidan in Outland–"
"I know what I'm doing!" Tyrande stubbornly insisted. "Once I absolve that family's jail sentence in Triumvir Myrielle's absence, and those whelps are done being imprisoned they will have learned their lessons in humility. This annoying love story can finally end! We're just lucky that Feathershine and Shadowstep won't breed."
Yes, perhaps it was a little mean of her to say. But High Priestess Tyrande was a friend to both priests and rogues in the end. She saw it begin with Deliah Feathershine and Jebidiath Shadowstep almost a hundred years ago, and she knew better than anyone else that it needed to resolve itself at last.
It was a happy ending, with everyone getting what they needed. And what greater blessing is there in life, than to be happy because you are loved so well?
Grinning, Feathershine and Shadowstep walked hand in hand out of the Temple of Elune. Their clothes were soaked, but it didn't matter. Perhaps they'd learned about romance the hard way, but the important thing was, that they'd learned.
THE END