A/N: The muses love the staple gun…the bunnies do not. The poor little bunnies are now stapled by their ears to the wall. But the muses are nothing if not gracious and have allowed for good behavior. They will only keep them up there over night…after they catch up on their soaps.

We clink mugs of hot chocolate and any beverage of choice to all of you for reading and/or reviewing. Thank you so much!

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Chapter 13

Smelled Like- Victory

He looked up at Teyla in horror. There it was. There it was smeared all over her face…that awful condescending smile. That smile that said, ah, my opponent whom I have just bested in hand to hand combat, effortlessly, and is lain out on the floor by my excellent skills. It shined in her eyes. It resided in the crooks of her mouth. It multiplied with the flare of her nostrils. The smile, which he loved aimed at other people, but not at himself, filled her face like a bright ray of evil sunshine.

It had been almost three months since Carus had tried to make herself at home. This was his first real, go for broke sparring session with Teyla since then and he was not sure what to expect. Would Teyla hold back? Would Teyla take it easy on him? Would Teyla go for the kill as soon as he picked up the sticks?

No. No. And, a resounding, yes.

However, John Sheppard still restrained himself.

Oh, he had thought himself so clever. He had told her of his blocking the deadly blow by Ronon even though it had fractured his arm. He still wore a brace on it for this type of thing as well as on his ankle. He would not go back on off-world duty until those came off, but he was a patient man. A patient man who apparently still had much to learn in the ways of Athosian stick fighting. A patient, flat on his back man, who realized, there was much more to the lesson than blocking one little blow to the head. There was apparently a counter move that landed you prone on the floor, looking up at the ceiling, and still wondering, who stole your wallet?

Teyla held her hand out to help his bruised ego up. "John, I told you, you weren't ready."

He smiled at the contractions. At least the expedition had had some sort of influence on her besides nanites, even if it was not considered proper.

"No, I'm ready just not ready enough, apparently."

She smiled that maddening smile again. "No, you're not mentally ready. You still flinch at certain moves. It will pass and maybe today will help."

Today. Yes, today would help in many ways. The Daedalus was bringing a replicator weapon to dismantle Carus. She lay in state in her father's lab and John would not go anywhere near there or allow anyone else until the Daedalus brought that bad boy to shoot her pining, replicated ass into oblivion.

He wanted to do it. He wanted to make sure that she was gone. He would shoot the whole damn room and have Rodney, Zelenka and Hermiod scan the entire city for any sign of a biomechanical signature. She had done something no other enemy had ever done. She had spooked him. She had gotten under his skin and getting her out was a hard task. He knew Ronon had been having similar problems. But, he and the Satedan were good and that was all that mattered.

He grabbed Teyla's offered hand and pulled to his feet. They bowed to each other and walked to the bench to get their gear.

"You're right of course. As much as it pains me, sometimes I just can't help it." It was damned embarrassing when shell shock was not from noise but from someone walking into a room or putting their hand out to shake it or sitting in a seat next to him at lunch.

The flinching was lessening, but damn.

They collected their stuff and headed out. "I'll see you later and accompany you to the room," she said.

Fear clutched him for a moment. He did not know if he could handle her going down there again. He did not know if he could handle himself going down there again. Only one way to find out and that was why he would shoot the immature collection of nanites himself.

"Okay," was all he answered as they parted ways.

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Col. Caldwell stood beside him and looked down at the sleeping girl. "Are you ready?"

"More than you'll ever know," John replied.

John held up the cumbersome weapon and fired. Carus disintegrated into a fine, electronic powder leaving no mark of her existence. It was as easy as that. With the shot, a phantom pain shot through his ribs, down his back, and into his ankle. It dissipated out through his toes just as quickly as she had into the air.

The curtain was finally drawn on this misadventure. It had landed every person in Atlantis in the infirmary at one point or another. Even Carson found himself a guest after all was said and done. His nurses insisted. The lump on his head had gone from being recounted as the size of a marble to the size of a softball. It all depended on who was doing the telling. He still could not get out of ending up under Dr. Biro's care for a few hours.

As John recuperated, the only thing not in a cast, splinted, or covered in bandages was his jaw. Through some miracle, it was just about the only body part not broken on his body. The only thing he would have wished to be broken (temporarily of course) would have been his hearing. Rodney had moaned and complained until his release a day later about his head, headaches, nausea and the tender lump under his hair. If John could have moved and if his fingers were not in splints, he would have slapped him in that tender spot, so, instead, he had Ronon do it.

It scared Rodney to death; he thought the big guy was under the influence again. John had perversely enjoyed that for the ten minutes Rodney falsely believed that Carus had come back from the dead. When Rodney was about to order a city wide shut down, John confessed that he told Ronon to give him a good cuff. The cold shoulder of silence was a welcomed reprieve and well worth the icy death glares.

"Hermiod has scanned the city and found nothing. Believe me, the Asgard know what they are looking for," Caldwell reassured him. "Sure you're all right?"

"Yeah, no, and getting there," Sheppard replied with a subdued grin.

"Fair enough," Caldwell said as they turned to face the others standing in the hallway. "It's done," he reported to the audience.

Shoulders and faces appeared relieved. This had been a bewildering and frightening experience. So easily manipulated, Atlantis had almost imploded and become a home to slaves. If Carus had had her chance, she would have been able to repopulate the city with replicators and there would have been nothing they could have done abut it.

Since this was a risky job, there were dead. Five returned to Earth with flags draped over boxes as John floundered in a drugged out of his mind sleep. One had been found in the Gate Room, pushed by Carus herself, one had been found near Ronon's quarters, and three had been caught in live fire with those affected. A few others had shared John's drugged state with broken bones or bullet wounds, including Sgt. Vasquez. Now, everyone was mending quite well with a little guiding help from Heightmeyer's section and Carson's army. Some had gone home to Earth not able to cope with the fallout. Everyone understood and did not fault them for it.

The small group walked back to the Jumper that would take Ronon, Teyla, Carson, Caldwell and him back to civilization. Caldwell took the copilot's seat. John caught the everyday movement in his periphery vision and made that hated flinch. John swallowed and no one mentioned it as he went through his start up routine as if nothing had happened. He still had some work to do before he stepped through the Gate.

"Flight, this is Jumper 4; we are returning to the barn."

"Everything go all right?" Elizabeth asked.

"Yes, yes it did." John said with a smile, because it had. He had insisted Caldwell come down as a neutral observer just in case…

But, there was no just in case. They had defeated her and her opinionated father and life was mostly back to the abnormally normal.

"We'll see you soon then. Oh, John. Rodney says to tell you that he has a surprise for you. He'll see you later tonight to try it out."

Eyebrows went up around the small craft and even Caldwell seemed interested. John just smiled and answered, "Tell him, I'll see him then."

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"What in the hell is that McKay?" John asked about three hours later.

Rodney stood before him with a large surf board, smiling smugly. "Thought you liked to surf the waves, Sheppard."

Lorne stood next to him as did Ronon; their curiosity peaked at being invited to this little get together.

"I do, but we're in a cargo dock, McKay. Not a lot of waves in here unless you plan on flooding it." Sheppard squinted. "Tell me you don't plan on flooding it," he said in a low and dangerous tone.

"Genius Sheppard, not stupid. No, it's even better Mr. I Want Flying Cars. Took apart one of the defunct Jumpers from Atlantis 2 and grabbed a part that will hopefully have the proper effect. Also took a part from some gizmo with a charged power source that no longer worked and spliced the two to this board that Airman Guzman allowed me to use."

As Sheppard looked at his friend, Rodney flipped the board around to display Ancient looking devices attached with…

"Is that duct tape?"

"Hell yeah, only thing that would hold these things on without drilling holes, which Airman Guzman said would not be tolerated." Rodney scrunched up his face in mock disgust. "Like he would only want to use this thing in water after he's tried its new purpose."

"And what is that new purpose?" John asked with his own smugness peeking through his mock scowl, because he had an inkling, but did not want to appear too eager.

"Oh come on! You have to have figured it out," Rodney practically bleated like one of Carson's sheep.

"Will it create traffic problems? Will I need a flux capacitor or dilithium crystals or Ride of the Valkyries…?"

"Marty McFly will envy you; Scotty's got nothing on me; and Charlie don't surf," answered Rodney.

"Oh McKay, you shouldn't have…hand it over; I've got to try it!" It was Christmas morning, last day of school, and the birthday party that beat all other birthday parties rolled into one.

"Hold your horses! First, there are a few things you need to know. This is how you turn it on." He held up a cylinder with a button on top, which fit into the palm of Sheppard's hand.

"I'm not on Jeopardy am I, McKay?"

"Ha, ha. No. Click it again and it will turn off. I suggest stepping off before turning it off. Now, there are a few glitches, but…"

"Glitches? What kind of glitches?" The squint returned.

"Well, sometimes it doesn't like to stop, so you've got to jump off, but on the plus side, I've programmed it so it won't go any higher than six feet off the ground." Rodney seemed so excited that Sheppard would accept a few limitations.

"Well, give it a try," Rodney said excitedly.

Sheppard laid the board on the floor and clicked the button. The board hovered about two feet off the ground. Sheppard stepped on and kicked off. He was in heaven. The board floated around the room following his movements like a surf board or even a skate board.

He could hear Ronon and Lorne shouting and whistling, but he ignored all of that until a box loomed too close and he misjudged his height when he tried to dismount. Next thing he knew, Ronon, Rodney and Lorne were looking down at him and asking him if he was all right. Sheppard lay there a moment and thought about the question. Without a doubt, he was well on his way.

He looked up at the trio and said, "I'm good." He sat up and Lorne helped him to his feet.

"Good," said Ronon rubbing his hands together, "because I want a turn next!" Ronon grabbed the board and the cylinder and gave it a try.

"It's all yours, buddy," John replied as he slapped Rodney on the back and said, "Thanks Rodney. I…we needed that."

"Anytime," Rodney smiled back. "Anytime."

However, John Sheppard was not one to just accept anything as is. He thought a few improvements were in order. A few additions could make it even sweeter.

"Of course, now, all it needs is a steering wheel and pin striping," John needled his friend while tapping his forefinger to his lips.

"You know, you're an insurance company's nightmare or wet dream, don't you?" Rodney snapped back as Ronon landed flat on his back, laughing. Lorne practically snatched the Jeopardy buzzer out of Ronon's hand vying for his own try on the board.

John answered Rodney with only a mischievous grin.

Yeah, John figured he was, but hell, it was worth it.

The End

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A/N: Well this has been a blast to write with such a gifted author as Stealth Dragon. She can knock 'em out in such a short time with such wonderful phrases that it's a pleasure to read and I learn a little something each time.

S.D. - I honestly think Drufan turns a phrase with a lot more finesse than me. I was just following her example.)

We don't have anything in the works yet but as you can see the muses and bunnies are always wrestling with something if not each other!