Can Our Lives Get Any More Random?

Chapter 4: Traveling Through Dimensions

Disclaimer: Look...All who think I own anything (other than myself) raise your hand now...

(multiple people raise their hands including my friend Lizzie)

You people all get to go to a physiatrist...FREE! (notices Lizzie) LIZZIE! Why are YOU raising your hand?!

Lizzie: Cuz you own a lot of stuff! Your iPod, you cell phone, your HOUSE!...the list goes on and on...

(facepalm) JUST IN THE STORY YOU IDIOT!

Lizzie: ...Oh...

Therefore I do not own anything!

Tas: CANDY, CANDY, CANDY!!

Murtagh: Is it bad that that...thing gets candy?

Tanis: Yes...very VERY bad...

Bartimaeus: (walks oven to Tas) Whisper whisper...

Tas: (stops and turns around smiling) No...More...Candy...candy...ca-BEEP! (robot voice)

Nathaniel: What'd you do to him?

Bartimaeus: He will always obey us from now on.

Everyone cept Eragon crew: Wow...

Eragon crew: ...Um...Do I want to know?

Stephanie: No...

Suddenly everyone(other than Steph) disappeared.

Stephanie: Damn!...I wanted them to stay...


They reappear in a forest.

Ptolemy: Where are we?

Nathaniel: Now why would you ask such a stupid question!? We are obviously in the world of...DUN DUN DUUUUNN! MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL!!

I don't own that!!

Everyone: GASPETH!

Everyone (except Barty) : (suddenly acquire coconuts and gallop around like they're on horses using the coconuts to make the sound effects)

Bartimaeus: Right...So why are you doing this?

Eragon: I dunno...I just suddenly had the impulse to gallop around as if I'm riding a horse!

Caramon: Don't we all sometimes... (stares into space)

Everyone: (stop galloping)

Knights of Ni: (appear)

Lead Knight of Ni: (in his speshul falsetto voice) We are the Knights who saaaaay...NI!

Everyone:...

Suddenly they all disappeared again.


They appeared in London.

Raistlin: And now it's my turn to ask...Where in the Abyss are we?!

Kitty: London.

Faquarl: (pops out of nowhere) Boo...

Bartimaeus: Faquarl! But I thought you were dead!!

Faquarl: (examines people traveling through dimensions with Barty) I thought all of these people were dead!

Kitty: Hey! I don't die!

Nathaniel: I remember you! You're...Freckle right?

Frec-I mean-Faquarl: (eye twitch) What did you just call me?!?!

Bartimaeus: Heh...This'll be good...

Nathaniel: I called you Freckle! That's your name right?

Faquarl: RAAAWR! (kills Nat...In a manner of speaking of course!)

Nathaniel: ...Ow...

Faquarl: Humph...

Nathaniel: (stands up) Now that that horrific incident of terror is over...Let's go get some cake! (walks away, whistling cheerfully)

Bartimaeus: What'd you do to him?

Faquarl: Same thing you did to him (points to Tas) except more violent! (twitch)

Tasslehoff: No...no...more...CANDY! AAAAAAAAAAAHH! (faints)

Faquarl: OK...Maybe a little less violent...

Bartimaeus: ...Heh heh...yeah...

Nasuada: You know what would be really nice right now?

Arya: ...Do I want to know?

Nasuada: ...Maybe...

Arya: Then no!

Orik: I do! Oooooooohh! PICK ME!!

Murtagh: Shut up, Orik! God, you're annoying.

Nasuada: I agree.

Murtagh: Really?

Nasuada: ...Yeah...

Bartimaeus: Don't get all lovey-dovey on me now! People these days...

Eragon: That reminds me! I LOVE YOU ARYA!!

Arya: (death glare)

Eragon: (cowering) I'm sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry! I'm soooooo sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!!

Arya: Shut up!

Nathaniel: OMFG! Jane's in town-

Bartimaeus: If you say one more word...I swear I'll...

Faquarl: What are you going to do? Go gargoyle on their asses?

Bartimaeus: (turns into gargoyle) Yes! Thanks for the idea!

Faquarl: (sigh)

Bartimaeus: Rawr.

Ptolemy: Um...I just realized...that I died a long time ago...and have no idea why I'm here now!

Bartimaeus: Shut up! I'm TRYING to glare at these people- what?!

Ptolemy: I said-

Bartimaeus: I heard what you said. I just realized...that you're right!

Ptolemy: And-

Bartimaeus: And I don't care!

Ptolemy: (runs away crying)

Kitty: I thought you were quite depressed that he died.

Bartimaeus: OMG! I WAS! (runs after Ptolemy)

Everyone: ...

YAYZ! Note that the characters are VERY OC!! Sorry that was so short...I needed to get me out of it cuz I added more of a plot! (which isn't good in case you didn't know) Thanks for reading! Please review! I only have 5 reviews for the whooole fic!! OH NO!! ahem...anyways!

Bartimaeus: Review or I'll go gargoyle on your ass!!