A/N: On the Yahoo Snickers fanfic group, I issued a challenge. The theme of the story had to be betrayal and secrecy. It had to be anti-griddle. Make them flame you, make them hate you. That was it. I, of course, had my own ideas in mind (and half written out). Originally a one-shot, I figured it would work best as a two-part story. I honestly have no idea as to how this came out. So please, tell me what you think. I'm a big girl…I can handle the truth.
Emily
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
UPDATE: 7/10/07: Grammar has been edited, and several errors have been fixed. Hopefully, it will be a bit better on the eyes now.
Unavoidable: Part 1/2
She was a horrible person. This thought ran through Sara Sidle's mind for what seemed like the millionth time, as she lay tangled in the bed's sheets, the warm body of Nick Stokes lying next to her.
What had she done? Just what the hell had she been thinking, sleeping with Nick when she had a boyfriend who loved her, someone who would give her the world if she asked.
"Sara?" She jumped at Nick's sleepy voice. "You awake?"
"Yeah. Just…thinking."
"This was…"
"A huge mistake," she finished.
"He's my boss, and my friend, and he has been in love with you forever."
Sara had at this time already left the bed, and was now proceeding to get herself dressed. "I know. And I love him…I really do." And she did! She loved Grissom very much. The question was did she love him as a boyfriend, or as a friend, a mere infatuation? They were silent as they dealt with the uncomfortable aftermath of a one-night stand between two friends. A period of time made worse by the fact that one of them just happened to be dating the other's close friend.
"Please…don't ever mention this again. It was a huge mistake, brought about by too much stress," Sara pleaded as she opened the door to leave. And in all honesty, that's what it had been. They had a tough week, and the pressure had been building for some time. Pair that with one or two beers (thought that was hardly enough to lower their inhibitions) and it erupted in an awkward encounter.
"Of course. It would kill Grissom if…"
"If he ever found out," Sara agreed.
"So what will you tell him?"
She shrugged. "That I fell asleep on your couch while we were watching a movie."
And with that she left, to return to the man who loved her, the man whom she truly belonged to. She had gotten Nick Stokes out of her system, and that was that.
Until a week later.
They had seen little of one another throughout the week, caused by both a heavy caseload and careful avoidance of one another. But when you work so close, confrontation eventually cannot be avoided, nor can attraction be denied.
Once again, the week had been hard, and combined with the effort it took for each to avoid the other; both were tired and cranky, causing most of the lab to make an effort to stay away from them. So as it was, Sara thought she was alone as she slammed her locker shut with a loud bang, finding some satisfaction in the way the row vibrated as though with anger.
"Angry are we?"
Sara looked up, her eyes narrowed. "Tired," she said stiffly. Nick nodded.
"I can most definitely relate to that." There was silence. Then:
"Sara I…"
"Nick…" they spoke simultaneously, both breaking into nervous laughter.
"Damn it Nick. This could never work."
"I know. Its crazy to even think about." He did not need to ask what she was talking about, for it was the same thing that had been on his mind all week,
"Six months with Gil, Nick. Six months. I just can't throw it all away." Yet despite her words, she was slowly coming towards him, just as he was inching towards her.
"And I have never seen him so happy. He loves you and I cant just take that away from him."
"And I love him…I really do." She sounded unsure of this, Nick noted, feeling momentarily smug. He immediately tried to push that feeling away. He wanted Grissom to be happy; he wanted Grissom to be loved in return. But yet…
They were now face to face, and he was close enough to feel her warm breath on his face. Just another inch and their lips would be touching.
"I thought we got this out of our systems," she said softly, her voice low. Nick bit his lip; god he wanted nothing more than to kiss her.
"And yet," she continued, "I still want you so badly."
It was all he needed to know, and he pulled her into a hungry kiss. She kissed him back, her hands tangling in his hair as their lips moved with a passionate fury. Seemingly on their own accord, his arms wrapped around her, pulling her closer as their kisses intensified. Days of avoidance and denial had once more led up to this meeting, and now had Nick's mind not been clouded with lust, he perhaps might have realized the seriousness of what they were doing, and what it would once more lead to. But even had he realized this, it would have made no difference. They had crossed that bridge, and there was no turning back now. They broke apart, both breathing heavily, faces flushed.
"My place."
Sara nodded. "I will be there in twenty minutes."
Nick didn't know how many road rules he broke as he drove home, but he simply could have cared less. His mind was focused on a certain female, the feeling of her lips on his, wondering just how long he would last.
Sara did in fact arrive only a few minutes after Nick. He pulled her into his apartment, wordlessly, their lips meeting once more as they stumbled towards the bedroom, tongues engaged in a furious duel. Nick pushed her on the bed, their clothes discarded in a trail leading to the bedroom, as their bodies prepared to melt into one, once more.
It was sometime later that reality once again set in, in the form of a simple phone call. From the hall, a shrill ring awoke the lovers from their sleep. Sara pulled herself from the bed, recognizing the cell phone to be hers. Nick watched as she opened it. He did not need to ask who it was, for the horrified look on her face gave it away.
"Hey Gil," She said, trying to sound normal. "I'm on my way home right now. I got caught up with something." At this point, she was attempting to dress while talking to Gil.
"Love you to," she said before hanging up. She looked at Nick.
"Shit."
"You can say that again." He had pulled on his pants, and now stood in front of her. He knew that she had moved in with Grissom a month ago, after he had finally admitted his feelings for her over six months. If what they had was to continue, they would have to manage their time better.
He mentally slapped himself on the head. How could he even think about continuing an affair with Sara Sidle behind his friends back? Sara seemed to pick up on his train of thought.
"What are we doing Nick? I don't want to hurt Gil yet…" She shook her head. "It doesn't matter, does it?" He didn't know if she was referring to what she wanted, or Grissom.
"I don't know."
"I don't think…can we stop this?" She looked so young, so innocent at that moment.
"Sara…" She silenced him with a kiss.
"I…I have to go." She hurried out, dazed and confused.
The whole drive home, her mind reeled with thoughts of the night before. What was this…. thing? Was it even a thing? After all, it wasn't as though she and Nick had been sleeping together over a long period of time; certainly not enough to compare to six months with Grissom. Right? Okay, so maybe the sex was better (all right…much better), but you shouldn't throw away…well, whatever the hell it was she had with Grissom (she was reluctant to say 'love') for that.
It would have to stop, she decided. She would have to just…stay away from Nick. She was a strong woman. She wasn't some teenage girl with overactive hormones. She would not become one of those women who cheated on the men they lived with. Nick was a good guy, and he deserved someone like him. Most definitely not someone who couldn't give him their heart.
Yes. As soon as she could, she would call him, telling him that they could not do this again.
Two weeks later, they were back in bed together.
It had, of course, been another, accident, Nick thought as he lay awake, well aware of the slender brunette cuddled up next to him. But regardless, shouldn't he feel guilty as hell?
Because truth was he felt no guilt whatsoever.
How the hell did they wind up like this, he wondered the fourth time it happened. It would start so innocently, for it wasn't as though they planned these encounters…
At first.
As luck would have it, a six weeks later (and three er…encounters) found them working together once more, a fate both had blissfully avoided up until then, Grissom preferring to keep Sara with him (not that Nick minded, for he was not jealous…really, he was happy for them. Kind of) however, fate has a mind of her own.
And a sick and twisted sense of humor.
Usually, when they were together, the initial encounter would happen out in the parking lot, resulting in Sara following Nick to his home. But this time…this time things were different. The case was bad, affecting Sara badly. But then again, abuse cases always hurt her. So after shift, she had gone out for a drink (for Grissom was away on a conference in Florida). Naturally, a few drinks later, her inhibitions were sufficiently altered, and thus, when Nick found her, she was, well, to put it simply, loosened up a good bit.
And so two drinks with Nick later found the pair in the woman's bathroom, slammed against the stall door, grappling for bare flesh, touching, kissing frantically.
The morning after (and several pills of aspirin later), Sara came to a very important conclusion.
She had no control over her hormones when it came to Nick Stokes.
Sad, but true. Nick, having come to this conclusion several encounters early, was eager to agree to 'officially' start an affair with her. It would be simple, he thought. No strings attached, just sex. No one knows anything. This ends as soon as possible.
And when Grissom came home from his conference, and kissed Sara in greeting, he had no idea that just hours before another man had kissed those very same lips; that another man had held her intimately in places that only the boyfriend should hold one's girlfriend.
Of course, you can try to fool your friends, but you can't fool yourself forever, for if you play with fire, you are bound to get burnt.
A/N: Part two coming…well, whenever the hell I write it I suppose. Please, tell me what you think!
Emily