He'd searched everywhere.

Ferretti had hit every one of Colonel O'Neill's hotspots. He'd even gone on and hit all of Daniel's hotspots. He'd tracked down Major Carter and Teal'c and asked them if they'd seen the man. (They hadn't.) Lou had stopped and checked the mess or Daniel's cot in the infirmary every fifteen minutes of his search for the past two hours. The front gate reported that he hadn't checked out. But Ferretti couldn't find the man anywhere.

It was a moment of desperation and total insanity that prompted the Major to check Colonel O'Neill's office. He'd been considering getting Doc Frasier to look him over for some sort of illness when he'd opened the Colonel's office door.

Major Ferretti froze. And gaped. And felt a little faint. Jack O'Neill was in his office. Ferretti hadn't thought Jack knew he had an office, let alone used the thing.

Worse, the man was typing on his computer! Forget the dust bunnies and obvious signs of total disuse, Colonel O'Neill was sitting in his desk chair and typing something furiously on his computer (Ferretti's dazed brain noted that he must type something in the range of 50 words a minute, which was information his mind couldn't process and thus promptly forgot), consulting a haphazard pile of beaten up notes on Standard Issue off-world field paper.

Yeah, he was definitely getting Doc Frasier to check his head. And then he'd tell her about O'Neill, because Daniel's latest mishap must have been the icing on the cake and driven Jack insane once and for all.

Slowly, Ferretti backed away. The last thing Lou wanted was to interrupt O'Neill doing whatever-it-was that was so important that he'd seek out his office of all things.

O'Neill was in his office and working.

Screw the reports! Hammond would have to get someone else to sacrifice themselves in the name of the base 2IC's signature. No way was Lou going near that office while Jack was in it. Or near Jack while he was in his office.

As Lou Ferretti turned the corner to the infirmary, it occurred to him to wonder what Colonel O'Neill had been typing. Then he decided he probably didn't want to know.

Hey, I've changed all of these chapters so that they're a bit longer and a little more involved than they were before. The format's changed, but I hope that doesn't matter too much to all of my fans! Enjoy the new Geek Watcher's Guide. I do not own the characters of Stargate: SG-1 or anything else pertaining to this little skit. Thanks.

TS