Sand: (Screams and punches air with tight fist) FINALLY!

Gaara: (Raises eyebrow) ...

Sand: You can't raise an eyebrow. You don't have any! (Attempts to hug Gaara but runs into a sand wall. Twitches on the ground) I'm okay...

Gaara: (Sweatdrops) ...

Sand: (Gets up quickly) Yosh! This is my first fanfic! I'm so... Ah...whatever. I only put one out so that people would stop thinking that I'm Fire.

Sand (thinks): Fire is so annoying. She's worse than Mi-chan from Furuba who always bugs Shigure to write his novels... (consult Fruits Basket if you don't know who these people are)

Fire: (glares at sand)

Sand: (Ignores Fire and turns to face the audience very quickly) Oh, yeah! Sabaku no Gaara is my co-writer. (Turns very slowly to look at Gaara)

Gaara: (Sweatdrops and narrows eyes) ...

Sand: He doesn't talk much but he's sooooooooooooooo kawaii! (Attempts to hug Gaara again and does) Yay!

Gaara: (Eyes round and dissolve into sand) ...

Sand: Eh! (Picks up a white hankerchief, some rope and a bottle of chloroform) You're not going to get away that easily! (Runs out of the room and chases Gaara all the way from Konoha (where Fire lives) to Suna (where Sand lives)

Temari (sweatdrops): I'm surprised Gaara didn't kill her yet.

Sasuke: (ignoring everyone, especially Sand and Gaara) On with the story...

0o0o0o0

Disclaimer: I own nothing, not even this fanfic. ... Actually, I do own this fanfic, but I don't own Naruto in any way... Unless I steal it from Kishimoto-san... Hmm... No. It's just easier not to own Naruto. I don't want the Kyuubi (ie Naruto). I want Shukaku (ie Gaara)!

0o0o0o0

Legend

"speaking"

'thought'

Shukaku/Kyuubi speech

0o0o0o0 (change in time or scene)

0o0o0o0

A Sand Project

Gaara's Dilemma

Chapter 1: Pros and Cons

Nara Shikamaru...

Con: He's lazy.

Pro: He's smart.

Con: He's weird.

Pro: He's organized and plans things out.

Con: He's around all the time.

Pro: Temari-neechan makes weird requests to see him and takes Kankuro with her.

Con: She doesn't take Kankuro with her all the time.

Pro: I can work the guy like a mule when he's in Suna.

Con: His excuses to be here are weird as well.

Pro: I can make him study other Hidden Village secret techniques from old video tapes and figure out how they work.

Con: He only knows two techniques.

Pro: The techniques that he knows are only known through his family.

Con: He's seems old.

Pro: He already knows how the secret techniques of Konoha works.

Pro: He's the first male shinobi to defeat Temari-neechan in a match.

Con: He's unmotivated as a shinobi.

Pro: He knows when to step up to fight in a battle.

Con: He's dating Temari-neechan.

Pro: Her dating him makes her happy.

Con: They both wouldn't admit to being a couple.

Pro: Their denials and faces give it away that they like each other.

Con: He's a chuunin.

Pro: She's a jounin.

Con: He's younger than her (in age and rank).

Pro: All of the guys who are the same age as Temari are afraid of her.

Con: This is why no guys (the same age as her) ask her out on dates.

Pro: Nee-chan works hard on her missions to see him on her days off.

Con: I don't know what she does at Konoha with him.

Pro: She doesn't tell me what she does with him at Konoha.

Con: She doesn't stop talking about him.

Pro: She's more focused after returning from Konoha.

Con: Temari forgets her mission in Konoha when he's around.

Pro: He can help me with my paperwork when he's in Suna.

Con: She thinks about him all the time.

Pro: She studies more to get smarter than him.

Con: She becomes brain-dead around the guy.

Pro: She's quiet when she's brain-dead.

Con: Her dreamy-eyed ogling is annoying.

Pro: She beats Kankuro when he insults him.

Con: She becomes scarier with him and Kankuro around.

Pro: He fears me.

Con: He fears me.

Pro: I can kill him anytime.

Con: This'll make nee-chan hate me.

Pro: He wouldn't question my authority.

Con: He's a loser.

Pro: He's not as big of a loser as Kankuro.

Con: He wouldn't do anything without being ordered and kicked.

Pro: He listens to nee-chan.

Con: Another loser around Sunagakure.

SIGH...

Pro: He knows how and when to keep his mouth shut.

Con: He knows about Shukaku.

Pro: He finds gossiping too troublesome.

Con: He finds everything too troublesome.

Pro: He's useful in making up plans and strategies during a battle.

Con: He's not strong.

Pro: He isn't loud.

Con: He's Naruto's friend.

Pro: He's Naruto's friend.

Con: He's a coward.

Pro: I can use him as a punching bag.

Con: This will make nee-chan angry.

Pro: If Temari-neechan beats me up, the medic-nins in Sunagakure are well-trained.

Con: He might report my beating him to Godaime Hokage.

Pro: He's too afraid of me to tattle.

Con: Godaime Hokage has a very powerful punch.

Shivers at the thought.

Pro: She wouldn't hit me since I'm the Godaime Kazekage.

Con: She would do it indirectly.

Pro: She wouldn't hit me too hard.

Con: His teammates are stupid and dumb.

Pro: They're easy to control.

Con: The loud, blond girl is annoying.

Pro: She isn't as loud as Naruto.

Con: She reminds me of Naruto.

Pro: I can tolerate Naruto's loud and annoying nature.

Con: I can't tolerate her.

Pro: I can work her like a mule as well.

Con: This'll make her louder and more annoying.

Pro: She's too afraid of me to do anything.

Con: The fat, round boy eats all of my food.

Pro: He stops when I stare at him.

Con: Shikamaru is average.

Taps pencil on desk in contemplation.

Pro: Temari-neechan really likes this boy.

Pro: He likes her as well.

'...' Gaara had to think for a moment before he scribbled down...

Con: He won't confess this.

Con: Neither will she.

Long-winded and exasperated sigh...

"KNOCK! KNOCK!"

"Gaara, you shouldn't work so hard," said the blond kunoichi as she entered the room holding a tray of tea. "You should rest—what are you doing?"

The young, red-haired boy with light green eyes, quickly covered the scrolls with sand and rolled them up underneath the sand blanket as he noticed his sister's wide-eyed curiousity at the two scrolls lying open on his desk with the big, black, bold letters 'Nara Shikamaru' on top, then more words saying 'pros' on one side and 'cons' on the other. "Nothing."

'Che, I think she saw the scrolls,' Gaara thought nervously as his older sister looked at his face scrutinizingly.

'Nothing... Gaara's same old excuse for everything...' Temari sighed, her eyes closed and head tilted back, a large sweatdrop on her head as she placed her hands to her hips.

"What do you want, Temari-neechan?" Gaara asked quickly changing the subject with his usual stoic, expressionless face as his sand opened the desk drawer, deposited the two scrolls inside then stealthily but very quickly closed it.

Temari straightened, crossed her arms across her chest and said genuinely, "Nothing...I thought that you've been working very hard inside of your office so you might like some tea."

Relieved and sighing mentally, Gaara picked up the little blue tea cup and took a sip. "Arigatou."

'Good, she didn't noticed anything...'

'What is Gaara up to? I saw Shikamaru's name on the two scrolls with one labeled "pros" and the other "cons". I thought that he liked the fact that we're going out...although we're technically not...' Temari wondered inquisitively as she watched her little brother take another sip from the small cup. 'He covered the scrolls up so quickly and then changed the subject. That is so unlike him. WHAT IS HE DOING!'

With the thought grating against her nerves, Temari ventured a question. "Gaara...I was just wondering, what were you exactly doing before I entered?" It's up to him to decide to answer it or not; after all, he was her youngest brother...and hardest to pry information from.

Light green eyes met slightly darker green eyes as Gaara finished an exceedingly long sip, placed his cup down gingerly and said again in his monotonous voice to the girl's expectant face, "Nothing."

Temari, feeling a little deflated and even more curious, expected the response since she knew that he wouldn't willingly give her a direct answer. 'I knew it. He's still the same after all these years. However...he's also a little different. He no longer sees himself as a monster and that fight with Naruto some years back during the Chuunin Exams in Konoha was what changed him. He's easier to talk to and he actually talks back. He's less scary and actually tries to help people. He still kills but he doesn't do it for fun. He wants to protect those that he cares about. Although he would never admit it...' Temari was completely lost in thought, had forgotten what she was supposed to be thinking about...

She didn't even notice Gaara scribble something down on a blank piece of paper and stamp it.

"I want to meet Nara Shikamaru."

Shaking her head to clear her mind, Temari stared at Gaara wide-eyed. "Nani! Um...I mean why do you want to meet him, Gaara..." A small, shaky smile crossed her face. 'What is Gaara up to? And why am I acting like I'm going to show my boyfriend to Otousama. Wait a second...DID I JUST CALL THAT BUM MY BOYFRIEND!' Gaara didn't respond. He simply handed his sister the document. "I want to meet Nara Shikamaru." Temari fidgeted a little in her place as she took the invitation. With a slight nod, the spiky-blond girl was out the door.

0o0o0o0

Kankuro was walking down the hall, whistling to himself when something knocked into him, sending him flying out the window. "Out of my way!"

Landing about three stories down, Kankuro was lying sprawled on the ground. His head was spinning. Temari ran out of the Kazekage Palace, looked down at her brother's broken carcass, shook her head in disappointment and nudged him with her foot before flying down the street towards the Main Gates.

Kankuro slowly got up while rubbing the back of his head with one hand. 'What's wrong with Temari today?' If not for Karasu, whom he had quickly summoned, Kankuro would've died from the fall. Sighing, he went back inside and straight towards the Kazekage Office. 'If I try to figure out Temari's mood swings, I'll go crazy.'

End Chapter 1

0o0o0o0

After thought:

Sand: (runs up breathing very heavily, carrying an unconscious Gaara) Hi... "wheeze" You can't kill me that easily! (plops Gaara into a cushioned chair) I won't die before Fire!

Fire: (picks up Sasuke and walks out of the room)

Everyone: ...

Sand: (ducks a fireball flying toward Sand's head) ... Uh... So what did you all think of my story? (smiles very widely)

Temari: THAT BUM ISN'T MY BOYFRIEND!

Shikamaru (thought): I hate women... Especially overbearing women...

Sand: (smiles shakily) But you look so---

Temari: (swings her fan around, trying to knock Sand unconscious)

Sand: (ducks and hides behind Gaara) You won't hit Gaara! He'll kill you!

Temari: (sizzles in anger and stomps out of the room)

Shikamaru: Don't get me into this. It's too troublesome. (walks out of the room)

Sand: (waving hand) Save me a seat on the hill! Don't worry, I won't forget to do chapter two.

Shikamaru: (ignores Sand) ...

Sand (thought): Gaara won't wake up... (cries worriedly) Did I use too much chloroform?

Fire: (walks in with smelling salts)

Sasuke: (runs up to Gaara and kicks him in the stomach)

Sand: (shocked wide-eyed) !

Fire: I'll wake him up... (pulls Sasuke forcefully out of the way)

Sasuke: (mumbling under breath) Bakayaro...sleeping on the job...

Fire: (swipes smelling salts under Gaara's nose) ...

Sand: (seething with ignormous killer intent directed at Sasuke) ...

Sasuke: (looks nervously at Sand and runs to hide behind Fire) ... (sweats)

Fire: (turns to Sand) He's awake.

Sand: (still seething with ignormous killer intent) ...

Gaara (thoughts): Why does my stomach hurt?

Fire: Well...ja! (grabs Sasuke and quickly runs out of the room)

Sand: (mumbling and babbling) I'm going to kill him... I'm going to kill him! I don't care if he has the Sharingan... I'm going to kill...

Gaara: Chapter two in four weeks... (turns and glares at Sand) Did you kick me?

Kankuro: (cries and hugs Karasu with sad music playing in the background) Sand forgot about me...

Sasuke: (disembodied voice) What's going to happen next? Will Temari give the invitation to her boyfriend?

Temari: (from outside the room) HE'S NOT MY BOYFRIEND!

Sasuke: (ignoring Temari and continuing) Or will she try to hide it from him? What does Gaara want with Shikamaru?

Shikamaru: (from outside the room) Hopefully not to kill me...

Sasuke: (ignoring Shikamaru and continuing) Will he actually kill Shikamaru? Tune in next time for Chapter two of Gaara's Dilemma.

Fire: (disembodied voice) You sound like a T.V. announcer.

Sasuke: (yelling) Urusai! I said to tune in next time, so tune in next time, dammit! You'd better tune in next time or...

Fire: (yelling) Look! The Sharingan!

Everyone: ...We can't see it...

Sasuke: (holding back anger) Just tune in next time. Come back in four weeks. Review. Blah...blah...blah...things that Sand forgot to say...

Gaara: (uses sand to hold Sand back) I already told the audience to come back and so did Sand.

Sand: (still going crazy) I'm going to kill you! Sasuke-chan!

Sasuke: (grumbles under breath) Who cares? Repetition is a good thing... (louder to the audience) Ja...for now.