Sub Zero Chapter 20: The Hospital Three Days Later…, a fastlane fanfic

The Hospital Three Days Later…

I'm taking deep breaths in broken sentences
You're seeping in to my darkest defense
As we lie in love and silence
My whole world becomes see-through
And every thought is framed by you

The soft, slow beeps of a heart monitor were the first sounds Billie heard when she woke up that morning. She was glad to be alive even though her entire body ached with an intensity she could only describe as hellish. Instead of focusing on the pain, her overly drugged mind found another, more important thing to think about: Van. Was he okay? Was he there with her? Where was he?

The last thing Billie remembered was Van being laid out on a stretcher as the paramedics worked on him. After that, everything was a blank. She didn't even know how she got to the hospital. Another ambulance had probably been called to take her there as well.

Slowly, Billie opened her eyes, the harsh fluorescent bulbs nearly blinding her. As her vision adjusted, the details of the room became a little clearer. Stark white walls and an uncomfortable looking chair at the foot of her bed made it clear that Billie was in a hospital room, as did the starchy feeling of the sheets covering her body and the ugly gown she wore. She glanced to her right and found she wasn't alone in this room. The bed beside hers had an occupant, but she couldn't make out any distinctive features except for a head of dark hair that was facing the other direction.

Billie sighed, her tired blue eyes drooping. Going back to sleep was tempting, but she'd already done enough of that. Besides, the pain thumping throughout her body would keep her awake until a doctor or nurse came in with some kind of pain killers. So she laid there, her eyes wandering around the room, hoping her roommate would soon turn towards her.

Shine like an honest deed
Inside my wicked world
And I feel alive I'm justified
Like an evil act performed for a good cause
Shine like a distant sun that's sent to warm this girl
And I feel alive I'm simplified
Like I was made for you

Thoughts of Van soon began to resurface. Billie couldn't believe how much she'd discovered about herself during those few nights they'd spent in the cabin. She also couldn't believe she'd admitted that she loved him. It wasn't so unexpected or sudden. That love had been growing ever since he'd helped get her out of that jam with Gavin West. She only wished she could have told him sooner. She wanted to know if her efforts to keep him alive hadn't been in vain. Now, more than ever, she wanted, no needed to see him. Her heart ached for him. He was all she had in this world right now.

As the need to see Van reached its pinnacle, Billie heard the soft creaking of the bed beside hers. Turning her head, she finally got a clear view of the person laying in it. "Van," she barely whispered when she realized the strong features and dark hair came together to form his face. She wanted to jump out of her bed and hop into his, but that was impossible, considering how crappy she felt at the moment. Instead, she settled for watching him as he slept, his body relaxed and comfortable.

Billie was relieved to see he was alive and doing well. He'd scared her on so many occasion, especially their last night in the cabin, which turned out to be an agonizing one for both of them. She pushed those dark thoughts back into the depths of her subconscious, instead focusing on some of the better memories she had, like being cradled in Van's arm as she cried and the touch of his fingers against her cheeks as tears spilled down her face. He had tried to make her feel better even when he wasn't feeling well himself. If it hadn't been for Van, she would have just given up when Dmitri tried to choke her. He was her saving grace.

Impromptu version of truth
And I could live without the world outside of you
Cuddled up inside your hands
I think I like the girl I am

There were so many things Billie wanted to say to him. The list she compiled in her mind was already reaching far beyond what she could have expected, and there were still so many more things she had to put on it. Billie could only hope that Van would wake up soon, just so she could tell him everything that was going on in her mind. She was no longer afraid of telling him that she loved him, because she really did, and holding it back would only make the regret of not telling him sooner weigh down on her heart. What she wouldn't give to see those grey green eyes gaze up at her, the smile cross his soft lips, and hear the sound of his voice. "Van," Billie whispered again, her voice coming out hoarse and raspy. She had no intention of waking him, but he did.

"Hmm…" Van groaned, his left hand falling over his face as he tried to hide from the harsh fluorescent lights. Yawning, he finally opened his shining grey green eyes and blankly stared at the bed next to his until he recognized the face of his boss. A smile instantly graced his lips as he gazed in her direction. Billie felt her heart skip a beat with the relief she felt. Van was awake. Oh, how she'd been waiting for this moment.

Billie extended her right hand, wanting to make sure she wasn't dreaming. She wanted to touch him, feel his hand wrap around hers, and when it did, she knew all was right in the world at that very moment. Her smile widened as a tear rolled down her cheek. She couldn't stop it. She was just so happy to see him awake and alive.

Van was relieved as well. He might not have remembered much past the shootout with Rousseau, but he did remember Billie saying that she loved him. He wanted to tell her that he had made that same revelation, but his voice didn't seem to want to cooperate. He could only stare into those beautiful blue pools of her eyes as his thumb traced circles over her hand.

"I love you," Billie barely whispered as more tears spilled down her cheeks.

Van raised her hand to his lips and placed a soft kiss in her palm. Mustering up as much energy as he could, he softly whispered, "I love you, too," his own tears of joy and relief threatening to spill at any moment. He'd never felt this way about anyone, and after an ordeal like that, he just couldn't sit back and let things play out. Van had already dealt with enough regret throughout his life. This was the one thing he wanted to make sure he never would.

Billie couldn't take it anymore. She threw off her covers and ambled towards his bed, never letting go of his hand. Pain or no pain, she needed to be closer to him. Once she was snuggled beneath his blanket, Billie cupped his face in her hands and pulled him towards her and closed her eyes, their lips finally meeting in a long awaited, feather light kiss. She reveled in the softness of Van's lips as they caressed hers for several breathtaking moments until she deepened the kiss, the taste of salty tears invading her mouth. Opening her eyes slightly, she realized they weren't just her own. Van was crying, for the first time she'd ever seen. It amazed her how deep their emotions ran for each other. She never expected to feel this way again, but here she was, totally and completely in love, and with the last man she ever expected to fall for.

Could I be your addiction?
All I want is to be craved
I wanna be non fiction
But I could never be that brave

Van was the first to pull away, his need for oxygen becoming urgent. He coughed for a few moments, his throat and lungs burning, but focused on how stupid he felt. He knew he hadn't been able to hold back his tears, and when he saw Billie open her eyes, his first response was to look away, hoping she hadn't seen them. But she held his face in her hands, refusing to let him turn away from her. Her thumbs ran over his cheeks, wiping away the tears, their eyes locking. A smile crossed her lips as she said, "We're both emotional train wrecks."

Van couldn't help but laugh at her comment. "I know, aren't we?" he replied, feeling relieved that she didn't see him as any less of a man. He brushed a few dark strands of hair away from her face and looked deep into her blue eyes.

"Yeah," Billie answered, doing the same. She leaned in and kissed him again, soft and slow, their lips lingering against warm skin. His left arm folded around her body and hugged her close as her head fell against his chest. For the first time in five years, Billie felt whole. She no longer needed to worry about her past catching up to her. It was over, and she was ready to move on. Love had finally found its way back into her heart.

Billie closed her eyes, snuggling closer to Van's chest, and fell asleep in his warm embrace. She was ready to close the Drayden Abney chapter in her life, and get some well deserved peace and quite. Van soon followed suit, but not before placing a soft kiss on her forehead and tightening his grasp around her waist. He, too, was ready to move on. With all that had happened in the last two weeks, everything in his life just seemed to fall into place. Love was a strange and funny thing, so was Billie, but both seemed to be the perfect additions to a life full of pain, strife, and regret.

Outside in the waiting room, Deaq sat with his leg propped up on a chair, Dr. Winslow explaining everything about their condition to him. The three days had finally come and gone and he would be able to see his partner and his boss for the first time in nearly a week, not counting the hour he'd spent with Billie at the hotel before she'd been rushed to the hospital. This would be the first time they really just got to sit there and enjoy each other's company, even though it would probably only last a few moments before he started to hound them about what happened in the cabin. That question of whether or not Billie had been delirious when she'd said she loved Van had gotten the best of him, and now was the perfect time to find out for sure if she really did (and if he did back).

'Soon,' Deaq told himself once the doctor was finished with his speech. He stood up and hobbled down the hallway towards their room. He was excited to see his partner and his boss, and the closer he got to their door, the more intense the feeling became.

Before wrapping his hand around the doorknob, Deaq thought it would be best to peek inside the room and see if they were still sleeping. When he noticed that one bed was empty, his eyes immediately flew to the second one. He could clearly make out Billie's head buried in Van's chest with his arm wrapped tightly around her as they slept peacefully.

Deaq finally got the answer he'd been looking for and decided to leave the two love birds alone for the time being. He'd hassle them when they woke up. Right now, it was better to just let them have some alone time. He smiled and walked back to the waiting room. The irony of the situation was beginning to dawn on him. Van had, after all, said that Billie was the hottest chick he'd never sleep with. Deaq just shook his head, chuckling at how much things were about to change. Love definitely worked in strange and mysterious ways.

FIN!

Music: "Wicked World" by Aneiki

I'm so sad, yet so happy. My story is finally finished! And what a wonderful journey it's been. This has definitely been an adventure. I enjoyed every minute of it. And I want to thank you all for being so supportive. This is my gift to you this holiday season, so whether you celebrate Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanza, or a variation, it doesn't matter. I hope you enjoyed the journey. I decided not to write an epilogue because it just didn't seem to make any sense after this last chapter. Besides, it was hard finding material to put in it. Thank you for all your wonderful reviews. I can't tell you how much I've appreciated them.

prplerayne: I hope that answered all your questions. Hehe. Thank you for being my beta! I appreciate all those long talks we had about this story and how to write it. You definitely gave me many good suggestions on what to put in here. THANK YOU! You ROCK! And I'm definitely enjoying writing this Christmas fic with you. It's gonna be a good one when we get done with it! Thanks for your wonderful feedback and comments. They've really driven my story to where it is now. Thank you so much! And have a very happy holiday season.

fan4fastln: I really hope that wasn't too mushy for you! Sorry if it was. I just had to put Billie's heart on her sleeve. Besides, I needed to give Van a reason to cry. I love it when there's a good reason for a guy to cry. It's just such a turn on! Uh! Makes me tingle inside. Hehe. I'm just weird like that. Anyway, thanks for sticking around and actually reading my story. I can't tell you how much I appreciated it. I loved all your comments. They picked up my spirits when I really needed it. I can't thank you enough. Best wishes and happy holidays.

agenttanya: Sorry to disappoint about the epilogue. I hope this chapter provided enough closure, though. Thank you for your wonderful comments! I'm so glad you enjoyed reading my story. I can't tell you how grateful I am, really. Thanks for sticking with the story. Happy holidays!

Avillie: I'm not trying to make you look bad! I swear! And seriously, if you're having trouble, I'll be glad to take a look at it and give you some pointers. That's what I'm here for. But, anyway, I hope this chapter answered your questions about Van and Billie. And thank YOU for reading and reviewing. I'm so glad you enjoyed this story. And I really appreciate all your wonderful comments. They really inspired me to write. I hope the holidays are wonderful for you. Have a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Francesca: Romantic enough? I hope so. I love making guys cry in fics. It's just so damn cute sometimes, especially when it's an appropriate moment. Thank you for reading, enjoying, and reviewing my story. I loved all your wonderful comments. They definitely made me smile. And fear not, this won't be the last Van/Billie fic from me. I will write more, as soon as I finish thisnext one I'm working on. Again, thank you, and have a happy holiday season.

shalimar: I hope you're not biting your fingernails anymore. Hehe. Did I managed to answer all of your questions? I believe so. LoL. Thank you for keeping up with this story. I really appreciate it. Your reviews really helped me solve a few major problems that I completely didn't catch while I was writing. Thank you for keeping up and enjoying every minute of it, and reviewing! Of course! Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

The Signed and Unsigned: To all of you that have read and reviewed this story that I didn't mention, and those of you who haven't reviewed, I want to thank you all for your continued support. Without you, I couldn't have finished this story. Thank you for being there, and I hope to hear from you soon.

Thank you all for making this story what it has become. I really appreciated it. Have a safe holiday season and a very happy new year!

-DK