Title: Quicksand
Author: kajamiku
Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me... life sucks XD
Summary/Notes: The pairing is Orochimaru x Sasuke, but there isn't actually any sexual description; just a LOT of allusions and indications of it. Quite obvious yaoi-ness.

It ran as a constant routine.

Every single time it happened, there were factors, incidents, expressions that told of the coming 'event'. Sasuke tried to ignore them at first, not wanting to admit to himself that he had allowed such a thing to happen. But Orochimaru was no fool; he took every opportunity to remind him of it. Glances, smirks, even a simple gesture could remind Sasuke of those times. And he knew that Orochimaru was fully aware of it; these gestures were meant for him.

The sennin didn't want Sasuke to forget it; he didn't want to allow the boy ignorance in any sense.

It usually began with a casual comment. Something relating to the last time; something they had discussed right before, something of Sasuke's denial or anger perhaps, of his violence. It was tossed in a random direction, not necessarily towards the young nin himself, as a smooth dart; a subtle attack that seems innocent enough, until you feel the prick of it.

Sasuke couldn't miss them.

They were made for him, of course, so they were unmistakably difficult to overlook. And it made Sasuke wonder if the snake bastard spared time especially for creating such devious tricks and hints. Whether he chose a time to simply sit and scheme, to think of amusing ways to torment Sasuke with memories and insinuation.

It wouldn't have surprised him if this was true.

These 'vague' allusions were never caught by anyone else. Even Kabuto remained blissfully unaware of how suggestive the seemingly innocent words were.

Then came the glances and smiles. If they could be called smiles. Sasuke didn't think Orochimaru was able to smile. A smile is simple. It conveys emotion easily and can be read. Orochimaru's 'smiles' were always dark; they were completely ambiguous, and as hard to read as the man himself. They always seemed to have layers of meaning; as if everything he said or indicated had a second, third or maybe even hundreds of meanings.

It was in the eyes as well. Those snake-like yellow eyes; slitted and almost always slightly amused. Even when he was punishing someone and spoke in apparent anger, his eyes always held that amusement; as if the entire world was his game and all the people in it, his personal chess pieces.

Next came the taunts. They weren't the usual kinds of taunts. Orochimaru seemed to have found an entirely separate multitude of ways to twist, mould and anger people, which he never used sparingly, and which he obviously found great enjoyment in using. Sasuke was often in the audience chamber with the snake sennin, and was able to watch him implement such devices on other people. They were never the same; they all seemed tailor-made for whomever happened to be suffering them at the time.

Orochimaru took great pleasure in saying and doing things that would have made even the most depraved pervert blush. Kabuto didn't seem to mind it; he dealt with the taunts and suggestions much better than Sasuke did. Sasuke couldn't ever seem to keep his temper for very long; it seemed Orochimaru knew exactly what to say in order to get under his skin. Or, as it often turned out, under his clothes.

It continued until, finally, Sasuke could take no more of it. Until Sasuke went to Orochimaru's chambers (where he always seemed to be when Sasuke finally snapped) to rant and rail, and usually attack him somewhat. It was pointless of course. Orochimaru only turned every touch a different way, all the while 'smiling' as if he knew all the secrets, and seeming amused that Sasuke was so predictable to him.

It usually happened when Orochimaru finally grew bored of Sasuke's violence; he'd pin the boy effortlessly, with practiced ease, and press himself into the boy's back, putting his mouth in easy reach of one of his ears.

"Still so weak, Sasuke-kun."

That was the moment. That was where everything came apart and everything began to happen, in a way beyond Sasuke's control.

Sasuke didn't doubt that the sennin could fuck someone without them actually noticing until the next morning. He had a way of distracting you from some things and making you notice others; he looks down at you and continues to show that insane grin, a grin Sasuke had never grown used to, even in all the time he'd been around the snake sennin, and mesmerizes you.

Of course, the morning after such an incident he was still there. Lying purposefully against the pillows and smirking at the slowly wakening boy. Sasuke didn't think he would have been, if he didn't know how distressed it made the young nin to find him there. Orochimaru was always wearing a self-satisfied look then, mixed with his usual amusement, which was heightened by the sadistic pleasure he took in torturing the boy's mind beyond breaking point.

"What's wrong, Sasuke-kun?"

He obviously enjoyed the bleary half-sleep state turning to panic and horror; he seemed to love the look Sasuke sent him before he scrambled out of the bed. It made his grin widen, made him lick his lips in enjoyment; as if he was remembering the night before and making sure, in that one movement, that Sasuke remembered it too.

The first time had, obviously, been slightly different. The significant looks and taunts had been there, but Sasuke hadn't understood, and so had only ignored them, noticing Kabuto watching him for a reaction, but not knowing why.

"I have many things to teach you."

Sasuke had trudged through the first week slowly. The training was much more demanding than he had imagined, and it seemed as if Orochimaru was purposely working him to exhaustion in every session. By the time Sasuke got back to his room, he could do nothing except fall into bed.

There was very little conversation in the place. All the hallways and rooms were practically silent, even the ones with people in them. The audience chamber had guests often, however, so Sasuke was never without entertainment. Though Orochimaru's toying with the local village leaders and missing-nins became infinitely less appealing to watch the longer Sasuke was there.

It happened first, on a day when the training had been more gruelling than usual; Sasuke had, as usual, collapsed into bed, but had no more than a couple of hours rest before Kabuto came in to fetch him.

"Orochimaru-sama would like to speak with you."

He had, of course, not complained much; complaining to Kabuto would indicate a level of familiarity, familiarity he never wished to have with the medical nin. So he walked in silence, hoping the slimy git didn't want to keep him up for too long; he still wanted to go to bed and sleep.

Well, he didn't get that wish.

Orochimaru was not gentle. Then again, Sasuke had never really thought he would be. He knew how to tease someone to madness, knew how to make someone beg and plead until their throat was raw, knew how to mix pleasure and pain perfectly, and he knew how to embarrass someone so much that they blushed for days afterwards whenever he looked at them.

He had always had something strange about him. Something that enthralled people, brought them under his control; made them love and obey him. It was something beautiful, but at the same time more ugly than anything Sasuke had ever seen. It was dark and cruel, like sharp claws digging into people's souls, keeping them in check, forcing them into submission. A perfect proselytising means; a way of gaining as much support as he wished, a way of guiding lost souls to his side, to serve the dark that he exuded.

Sasuke had never understood Orochimaru. He wasn't sure the snake sennin could be understood. But then, he couldn't say he'd ever tried; it was always so much easier to just believe that he was evil and insane, and that he wasn't in his right mind when he spoke of things that made most shiver without flinching. When he killed without guilt or fear or regret, when he 'smiled' and chuckled and spoke of power. When he reclined and watched and enjoyed the sins and pains of others.

Orochimaru enjoyed reminding Sasuke about all those times, because he liked to see the distress in the usually expressionless coal-black eyes.

But despite the way Sasuke shuddered when he remembered, despite the horror and revulsion and regret, it continued to happen. It continued to devour him, to drag him, in like the inevitable tug of quicksand; a drug, a stimulant, an excuse, a routine… a way of proving he was alive, and a way for Orochimaru to declare, again and again, that Sasuke's body belonged to him.