A couple of minutes later, Sharona entered the room. Seeing him on the floor, she ran over to him and put her hand on his shoulder.
"Adrian—are you alright?" she asked, full of concern.
He looked up at her through teary eyes.
"I'm—fine. How are you feeling?"
"Much better now. Your bathroom is completely clean, I promise you. I am so sorry about that; if I would have known that was going to happen, I would have stayed somewhere else…. You sure you're alright?"
He stood up slowly, still somewhat guarded from her recent… emesis. She was apologizing to him for being sick, something she couldn't even help…. Sharona left the room first, walking into the kitchen, and he followed her. The Lysol had cleared quite well; there was just a hint of it wafting in the air.
"Sharona," he heard himself say to her. Oh, God, this was going to be so hard. He couldn't imagine her gone from his life again, indefinitely.
"Yes?" she turned around, watching him. He had to say it now, or else he'd never say it.
"I, uhm… I want you to be happy, Sharona. I don't want you to feel… guilty any more about… leaving, and I'm sorry that I made you feel guilty…. I—" his voice was breaking up again, but he caught it. That kind of emotion was not allowed to surface. "I—want you to go back to New Jersey, and… forget all about me. You need to… be with your family; they need you—" He fell silent, and looked down at the floor, wringing his hands nervously. He had done it. He had told her all he needed to tell her without the aid of note cards, even. He couldn't smile though. Probably never would again.
Her jaw dropped. She stared at him in stunned silence. Tears welled up in her eyes. What had come over Adrian suddenly, to make him so… accepting and understanding of her situation? This act of selflessness by her self-absorbed boss shocked her to no end, and she just stood there, trying to comprehend what she had just heard. He had said such a kind, understanding, and noble thing that it was impossible for her to respond right away.
He looked up again to see her staring at him, eyes watering and lips trembling. His eyes were watering as well, so he rubbed them with his hands to remove the threat of tears. He let his hands fall limply to his sides, and, without another thought, wiped the moisture off on his good pants.
All of a sudden Sharona advanced forward and embraced him tightly and completely, sobbing quietly into his shirt. Forgetting all about the earlier turn of events, he hugged her back, burying his face in her hair as tears again filled his eyes.
"Do you really mean that, Adrian?" she said, muffled in his chest.
"Yes," he replied helplessly. He swallowed down the sobs that threatened to commence, both dreading and awaiting her response.
She slowly leaned back from the hug, looking up into his eyes, which were misty with tears. "I could never… forget you, Adrian," she said, her voice racked with sobs. "I don't know how to say—well, what I'm tryin' to say is—I may… return to you someday, as soon as I get my own life straightened out. It's—been so hard for m—"
"I know," he replied, feeling a tear sliding down his cheek. "Please, just g—go to them—they need you more than I do." He removed one hand from her back and wiped the tear away.
"Oh, I wish things would have turned out differently," she cried, looking up at him. "Then I could stay here, with you. Believe me, I'd rather it have happened that way; I was happy here…. But it didn't, and I have to live with that every day, and I have to try to make do with what I've been dealt, and—"
All of a sudden, Adrian cupped his hand behind her head, and closed his eyes as he gently kissed her forehead. Before she could respond, he pulled away from the embrace and turned around to face the kitchen window, letting the tears flow freely now as he bent over the sink.
"I'll miss you, Sharona," he murmured tearfully, as he gazed at the blue sky outside. It was too hard to look at her now. He had actually kissed her.
She was sobbing openly now; he could hear it. He remained where he was, watching his tears drip into the basin of the sink.
"I'll miss you too, Adrian," she sobbed. He stayed turned away from her, too terrified and tearful to let her see his face again. Hoping to block out the sound of his own sobbing, he turned on the spigot, rinsing out the basin of the sink. A few minutes passed, he heard the front door shut, and when he finally shut off the taps and turned around, she was gone.
He had to let her go. He had to let her… move on. And he had let her do just that. She had saved his life, made him healthy again, and he had to do the same for her, as hard as it was for him to do. All he wanted was for her to be happy, healthy, comfortable—things he was not accustomed to feeling. She had always been so good to him, and she deserved to be happy. Just as Trudy said that he deserved to be, but he still didn't believe it.
Maybe, just maybe, she'd return to him someday. He watched her through the blinds of his living room window as she loaded her luggage into the trunk of a cab. Tears streamed down his face, and he let them drip onto the floor. Maybe.
The End
I thought that was the proper place to stop with this story. I guess it's more of my own better send-off for Sharona, a less sudden (and maybe more satisfying) severance. What did you think? Please let me know. I actually have not begun to write any other stories, so do you have any ideas I could play around with? I may even write a continuation to this story, but only if I get some feedback to do so. But for now, I have writer's block now, and I need all the help I can get. And please review this story. Reviews really honestly do encourage me to write. --Amy