Disclaimer: I don't own Street Fighter, Street Fighter II V, or anything of the sort. This is a work of fanfiction written purely for my own enjoyment, and it is based off of the animated movie, not the series, or the game. In the animated movie, Ken was captured and brainwashed by Bison. In the series, it was Ryu who was captured. This is going to be shounen ai, Ryu/Ken to be exact. If you can't deal with it, don't read it. This is set in a small series of vignettes. Ken 500 words each time, Ryu 1000. You'll see.
A Time To HealThe sky was brightening with the distant sunrise, but the air was still damp with the early morning dew. The dense water droplets wove through the overly long fauna, obscuring the wood planks of the boardwalk that barely rose above what seemed to be the surface of fenland. Strange animals called in the distance, echoing through the fog. There was the unmistakable smell of the marsh hanging in the air, almost a stench, but within it there hid the scent of wildness. Of freedom.
It had been a long trip. But he was finally there.
The middle of nowhere.
The old wood boards of the path chirped as heavy footsteps trekked across their beaten surface, but the fog seemed to muffle them so that they traveled no further than the lone figure. Brown, glazed eyes ignored the beauty of the scene, focused solely on the path ahead of him. It was all he could to put one foot in front of the other, to keep walking. To keep going. Hair that was once golden hung tarnished and limp.
Ken Masters had once had more power than most people could ever dream of holding. He had been strong, had felt invulnerable. And while he still held onto his wealth and his material things, he was no longer the headstrong fighter he had been. He no longer tried to hold that kind of living energy in his hands. He liked to think that he knew better, that he had wised up. That he had matured. But he knew the truth.
He was afraid.
He was afraid of himself, of his own weakness. It was his weakness that had allowed Bison to capture him. And while that might lead other men, better men, to go out and to become stronger, it made Ken take a step back.
The young man sighed as he shifted the heavy pack over his shoulder. It had definitely been a long road. He remembered proposing to Eliza before Bison took him. She had doubted his offer, had practically thrown it in his face. That didn't make her any less a friend, though. She had been kind to him when he returned from his... trip.
Unfortunately, she wasn't able to help him much further. It was up to him to heal, to deal with the after effects.
He was a fighter, but he had no defense against the kind of attacks that Bison used. Bison had... violated him. Had raped his mind. Had forced him to do things that... that he regretted. And now he had to live with it. He had to live with the mental scars of that. The mental stain. The nightmares.
He knew he wasn't doing too good of a job of it, though.
As focused as he was on the path directly ahead of him, he almost missed with another figure blocked his path. Brown eyes rose upward, slowly. It had been forever since they had seen each other. Wearily, he grinned. "Hello, Ryu."
-o0o-
Morning was quickly maturing to mid-day. A single home sat along the border between the raising cliff, and the surrounding forest. It had once belonged to others, nameless others who had left it, forgotten it, or merely abandoned it. Its current occupant didn't know, though he did know that it had sat patiently without the loving attention of inhabitants.
He knew, without being told, that the structure had been there for a long time. It had seen many storms, and had survived them all.
He had secured the thatch roof, preparing it for another year, and hoping that the winter storms would be kind to his work. He had fixed the wooden floor where something had either eaten its way into the house, or eaten its way out of it. He had repaired the walls, damaged by the elements and by the local wildlife.
Currently, though, he was not alone in his occupation of the ancient dwellings.
A few strands of red and blond hair poking out from under the covers were the only indications that the large mass of bedding hid a body. With a rueful grin, Ryu bent next to the only bed in the entire house. "Ken?"
"Mm?" a low rumble came from the hidden recess.
"Time to get up." Ryu said quietly. Normally, he wouldn't have bothered being this gentle. Normally, he would have pounced on the bed's occupant at first light, like a cat pouncing on a sleeping mouse. And if he had done that, the mouse sleeping in his bed would have had a little mousy heart attack.
A small animal whimper whispered from the piles of covers, Ken asking without words if he had to.
Ryu frowned. Where was the man he knew who always wanted to get up, to greet each and every new day? Where was the man he had known who could fight the coolness of the night with just his warm humor?
With a sigh heard only by himself, Ryu acknowledged that Ken wasn't here under normal circumstances. He wasn't coming to invite Ryu to the states, or to a trip around the world, or to an adventure, or to a fight. He was here because he needed Ryu's help.
Ken needed to heal.
The first step towards healing was to test how severe the injury truly was. And Ryu knew that this wound, though it wasn't physical, was exceptionally bad. After all the time that had passed, Ryu had expected scars; granted, deep and twisted, but scars nonetheless.
Instead he found the wounds bleeding and infected.
"Ken?" Ryu tried again. "You need to eat."
"'no." came the muffled reply, as if Ken had reverted back to a child. "not hungry."
"You will be soon enough." The Japanese fighter grinned, though the expression went unseen. "Come on."
"Ryu?" There was confusion in the voice, as if Ken had forgotten where he was, and who he was with. Cautiously, as if fearing the new day held deception in its golden warmth, the covers were pushed away. Large brown eyes, bloodshot and tired, blinked up at him. A small pink tongue darted out to lick chapped lips. "What time is it?"
"Late." Ryu stood up and moved back as Ken climbed blearily out of the bed.
"I don't even remember going to sleep." The strawberry blond remarked as he stumbled from the bed, not even noticing his state of undress. He winced as he caught himself.
"That's because you didn't." The darker male shook his head. Ken had been unconscious since yesterday morning, but only asleep since late last night. "I brought you here."
His American friend had barely said hello before he crumbled, crushed under his own weight. Ryu had barely been able to catch him. They had stayed like that for a few moments as Ryu wondered if Ken was going to snap out of it. As time progressed, and Ken remained limp in his arms, he took the chance to see how different the blonde appeared.
And there was no doubt that Ken had changed, appearing thinner, weaker, more fragile.
He didn't have to admit that he had carried Ken in his arms, up the remainder of the path, through the woods. He didn't have to admit that he had undressed Ken and put him in the only bed. He didn't have to admit that he stayed up all night, watching Ken sleep. And he didn't have to admit that when the night came, and Ken had been curled up on the bed shivering enough to shake the entire earth, Ryu had given him all the blankets he had had in the house. And he didn't have to admit that he had petted Ken's hair, because he knew Ken liked it, when the night demons came to haunt his dreams, chasing them away.
He knew Ken came to him because they were friends. And if anyone ever asked, that's the reason he was doing this.
He didn't have to admit to anything else.
He didn't have to admit it, and he wouldn't, even if asked.
Dark brown eyes watched as Ken almost fell, turning to look at him. The slighter figure opened his mouth to apologize, but instead of saying anything, he merely blushed and looked away. Even if he had been blind, Ryu would have seen how ashamed Ken was of himself.
Unspoken between them was an acknowledgement and an acceptance of the apology. With his head hung low, and his strawberry and gold hair tangled around his head, Ken moved towards the promised food.
As Ken made his way cautiously, each step unfamiliar to him, Ryu watched him. Cold rage caused his fist to tighten, and only the awareness that Bison was dead, that Ken –would- heal, allowed him the ability to relax. Other, more curious emotions made their presence known as they slipped through him. He felt concern, true. And protective. And pleased, because Ken had come to him.
He would make sure Ken healed.
-o0o-
It isn't that pain actually hurts; it is the expectation of pain that hurts. It is the idea of pain that causes discomfort. But it is hard to buy into that when fists that can do more than simply break boards are pounding your flesh. It is hard to remember that concept when you can't raise your guard up fast enough to block sidekicks to your torso and head. In times like that, it is far easier to think of the saying: Pain is fear leaving the body.
Pain is weakness leaving the body.
He was tired of being weak.
Dark brown eyes tried to focus on Ryu as the stronger fighter delivered hit after kick as Ken tried in vain to defend himself. His gaze always seem to stray to the red headband his friend wore, though, distracting him, reminding him. Even in Ken's nightmares and dreams Ryu wore that headband. Like a splash of blood across his forehead. Like a tie that would never be unknotted.
Ken had his strawberry blond hair tied back in another long braid. Why did Ryu keep the headband? It was a simple piece of red ribbon. He could have thrown it away years ago, he could have gotten rid of it after the cut to his head healed. Why did he still wear it?
The Japanese man moved quickly, detecting every weakness and exploiting them with tear-jerking efficiency. There was the sound of soft cloth snapping as fists flew, and the sound of soft grunts as those hits landed. They had been sparring all morning, the same kind of thing they had done when they were children training at their Master's Dojo. Only now, Ken wasn't Ryu's equal.
The American's eyes closed as his entire body tensed, waiting for yet another kick to the upper body.
He was ready for the next flash of pain to strike him. He was ready for the next bruise or broken bone or cut. He was ready for it. Because he felt he deserved it. He had lived with this fear far too long. And if pain was the only way to get rid of it, then he would be willing to endure all that Ryu cared to give him.
The kick never landed.
Slowly, afraid of what he would see, Ken's brown eyes slid open.
Ryu was still, one leg up in the air aimed to deliver a hard kick to the side of the blonde's head. His eyes, which were usually a dark brown, were black. Unreadable.
Ken stood frozen, as he waited for Ryu to either fall out of the stance or to do something that he normally would have thought unimaginable.
Ryu was good at that.
Doing the unimaginable.
He always had been.
With utmost control, Ryu brought his foot away and settled it solidly on the ground. Around them the wind stirred, kicking up dirt and leaves and loose strands of brown hair. They stood there, silent, staring at each other.
-o0o-
'He flinched.'
Ryu stood still as stone with a light frown marring his otherwise calm features feeling the life of the earth washing over him, around him, through him. He was still in his fighting stance, but he knew there was no threat of an attack coming from his opponent. There never had been. The person opposite him dropped his arms so that they fell into a proper fighting stance instead of the weak, sloppy block that they had been in.
He couldn't believe it. 'He actually flinched!'
Ryu took a deep, calming breath. Trying to find clarity. Trying to find tranquility. Trying to find answers.
The wind died for a moment, pausing to wonder about the scene it had stumbled upon. Ryu could feel it, feel its power, feel the power of the entire world around him. He was one of only a handful of people that could harness such power. Ken used to be one of those, but... Ryu doubted that Ken could do so now.
The light sparring match was barely enough to phased him. Not even enough to break a sweat. He hadn't even needed to catch his breath.
But it did clarify a lot of things.
Ken was damaged. Severely. His fear was causing him to not only ignore, but to actively fight against years of training that had ingrained certain reflexes into both of their muscles. The blond was pulling punches; not just a few of them, –all- of them. He was second-guessing himself, trying to talk himself out of blocking.
How was he going to handle this? How was he going to help his friend? How was he going to help Ken heal?
Instead of anticipating easy to see punches and kicks aimed at him, he was curling up and letting them land. Instead of blocking, he was flinching. It was frustrating. And it was aggravating. But it was also disheartening. And painful.
It was as if Ken didn't trust him. As if Ken was afraid of him. As if Ken...
It hurt.
Ryu couldn't remember a time when he wasn't friends with Ken. The blond was so much a part of his life, so much a part of his up bringing, so much a part of who he was, that he couldn't imagine life without him. Their lives were too intertwined. If he tried to erase Ken from his heart, he'd end up worse off than when Bison brainwashed his friend.
There would be no passion left to fight with. Because there would be no passion left. There would be nothing but a shell, nothing but a body.
At the same time, Ken was everything that Ryu wasn't. Together, they balanced each other, like Yin and Yang. Yin, the quiet, the yielding, the giving. Yang, the dominant, the demanding, the strong. Ken had been the Yang: headstrong, rushing off in one direction after another without a thought about the consequences or about the effort it took to actually reach his goal, demanding. And when they had been together, he was the dominant one, making all the decisions. And while Yin and Yang represented female and male as well, Ryu had realized a long time ago that sex rarely mattered. It was the idea behind the symbols, not the gender. He knew he was Yin. Quiet and yielding, and...
And he would have given Ken anything. Everything.
They were each the reason that they both trained so hard in the first place, that friendly competition. Trying to outdo each other, trying to match each other, trying to overcome their own weaknesses in order to be the other's equal. They were meant to compete with each other, and to outdo everyone else.
They were Yin and Yang, eternally competing with each other, forever trying to overcome each other, and ultimately balancing each other.
Ken's pain was hurting Ryu, and the stronger fighter didn't know what to do about it other than accept it. He would figure out what to do with it later, after he helped Ken.
The wind picked up again, quickly running from the scene, going off to whisper to the mountain, to the snow, and to the sky. It knew a secret. It knew a secret, and secrets were meant for telling and retelling. The leaves of the nearby trees applauded the wind's retreat, a soft clapping and rustling as each green hand tried to steal the secret away, and save it for themselves.
Ryu bowed to his partner, as was only proper to do after a spar. His American friend returned the maneuver, anxiety written plainly not only in his body's nervous movements but also in his hesitancy. And the fact that the fairer male bowed deeper than the Japanese fighter.
"Come on. I'll show you where the stream is." Ryu stated as he jerked his head in the general direction of the river. He shifted where he stood, so that he was no longer even remotely in a fighting stance, completely open for Ken to attack him. The darker smiled slightly, trying to be inviting. "We'll get washed up, bring some water up for later, and go find some lunch."
"Yeah?" Ken asked hopefully, relaxing where he stood until he seemed to be slouching.
Ryu's eyes narrowed at the submissive posture.
He would make sure Ken healed if it killed him. He wasn't sure how, but he'd do it. Ken had come to him for that specific reason, and there was no way he'd let the blond down. Even if Ken no longer trusted him in a fight, no longer trusted his abilities, Ryu had faith in himself. And he had faith in Ken. He'd make sure Ken healed, even if it ended with Ken hating him. Because at least Ken would have been healed. At least he'd be who he was. He'd be confident again. He'd be strong again. He'd be whole again.
Because that was all that mattered.
He was all that mattered.
Ken...
"Yeah." Ryu nodded.
-o0o-
Ken splashed out of the water, his hair flat to his face. He slung his head from side to side to get it out of the way. When he was done, he blinked his brown eyes and searched for a familiar figure. Ryu wasn't that hard to find, sitting nude on a large rock as he washed his clothes.
Just looking at him, Ken knew Ryu had changed since they were kids. And it was definitely for the better.
Even from where he swam, Ken was able to see the play of skin over muscle, and there was a lot of muscle to play over. He knew from experience that some people who went without clothes were naked, and others were nude. They had spent far too much time together to be embarrassed about their bodies, too much time honing their bodies so there was nothing to –be- ashamed of. The blond tilted his head to the side, wondering if he had stuck with his training if he would look like that.
Ryu wasn't just built. He was solid. Solid muscle and tactics and compassion and dedication and...
And everything else that made Ryu, well, Ryu.
Ken paused for a moment, his eyes trailing over to the river. It seemed calm enough, but he had just been swimming in it, and knew how deep the water really was. Calm and deep, just like Ryu. Ken could always appreciate that.
The American shook his head as he sank down into the water, feeling suddenly anxious and unsure for reasons that were unexplainable. Why was he here? He... he shouldn't have come. He should have stayed in the U.S. and out of his friend's way. He shouldn't have been so selfish...
But...
But coming here was all he could think of. It was the only thought that made him feel comfortable. It was the only thought that made him feel safe.
"Hey, Ken." Ryu shouted, capturing the blonde's attention, dragging his thoughts from their downward progression.
"Yeah?" Ken returned, swimming up to his friend.
"I think... I think we should start from the basics again." Ryu stated slowly, softly, as if he was thinking. But then, that was Ryu's normal speaking voice.
"The basics?" The American asked. He was too sick with himself, of himself, to be insulted.
"Yeah. Both of us, practicing basic katas again." Ryu nodded with a rare smile. "I think it would be a good idea to improve our attacks and blocks. Plus, I've been wanting to do it for a while."
"Why haven't you?" Ken asked, his dark eyebrows coming down in a light frown as he moved to sit next to his friend.
Ryu shrugged, "No time, really. I've always been on the move, traveling. And yeah, I could have taken the time to practice, but... I've just never taken it. But now, it'll be just the two of us, just like old times."
Ken nodded, resting back on the rock. 'Yeah, just like old times.'
-o0o-
A whisper broke through the soft nocturnal haze. Dark brown eyes snapped open as the world traveler became aware not only of his surroundings but also that something was wrong.
Ryu turned, rolling from his back to his side and automatically spooning his bed partner. He had insisted earlier that Ken take the bed, but his American friend refused to take it for a second night, stating that they would either share, or he would take the floor. When Ryu had placed a mat on the floor, Ken had promptly joined him, talking about how unfair it was that he was kicking Ryu out of his own bed. In the end, they decided to share the small cot, dressed in nothing but their shorts.
He was aware enough to realize the way their bodies fit together, like two pieces of separate puzzles that locked better with each other than in their own puzzles. He was also aware enough to push such thoughts away. The Japanese man leaned up on one arm.
Ken was having a nightmare.
The smaller male had curled up, tucking his knees against his chest, as if he was trying to make himself as small as humanly possible. Sweat dripped from his bare skin, rolling off like fat tears of distress. Blond hair was tangled and plastered to Ken's pale face.
He looked so young. So... vulnerable.
Ryu felt his heart jump to his throat, threatening to choke him, as Ken made another soft whimpering sound. Carefully, he rested his hand on his friend's bicep. No one was there to take notice of how the usually stoic warrior visibly flinched when Ken cried out, his body tensing under the gentle touch.
"Shh, Ken, Shhh." Ryu soothed, brushing back some of the thick locks of sweaty blond hair away from Ken's face. "It's just me. It's just Ryu. Shhh."
It took some time, but the dark haired male's patience finally won out. Slowly, Ken began to relax, his body uncurling. Still, Ryu continued to murmur to his friend, trying to either sooth the night terrors away, or to gently wake the blond up. He ran his hands over bare skin and ran his fingers through sweat drenched hair. When he ran out of soothing English words, he switched to his native tongue.
Until, finally, Ken's breathing evened out. The blond turned where he lay, blinking brown eyes up at him. Confusion and weariness laced his voice, like a date-rape drug in a familiar drink. "Ryu?"
"Yeah." Ryu nodded, his hand pausing in its upward slide against Ken's arm. "It's me."
There was another of those small animal whimpers, and Ryu hurried to assure his friend, "Don't worry, you're safe. You were having a nightmare."
"I know." Ken sighed. "I'm always having nightmares."
To that, Ryu had little to say. He knew, and expected as such. So far, Ken had been there a total of two nights, and on each night, the brown eyed male had yet to make it through a full hour without having some kind of disturbance in his sleep. It was a wonder Ken was still able to stand. Ryu was about to say as much when Ken whispered something that completely and utterly silenced him.
"Even when I'm awake."
Ryu paused, letting that piece of information roll around in his head like a piece of sand in an oyster. He didn't bother hoping for any kind of pearl of wisdom. He just hoped for something constructive to say. Finally, he asked, "Do you want to tell me about them?"
"Not really." The American male replied, turning where he lay so that he was facing Ryu instead of away from him. "But... But I guess... I see him, sometimes, like a flicker in my vision. And he's smiling at me, telling me...."
Ryu didn't need to be told who "he" was. Bison. Even dead, the monster was powerful.
"He enjoyed the fact that we trained together, that our fighting styles were so similar, that we were supposed to be life long opponents. It made his... He found things... thoughts...." Ken's voice trailed off as he became lost in the abstract collages that were his memories and nightmares. Visions from the time spent with Bison's mental fingers scraping down his mind. Some, twisted versions of the truth. Some flat out lies. And some... some were flat out truths. "Shit. It made it that much easier to twist me to his will."
"We may be life long opponents, Ken, but you proved that we're life long –friends- too." Ryu quietly informed him. "Bison didn't expect that."
"He knew it was there, though. He knew it, and he didn't care. He knew he was powerful enough to use me as a tool."
"No he wasn't." Ryu replied, laying down and looking through the darkness. "He brought you here, but... you didn't obey him. You fought his control. You knew we were friends, not enemies. Together, we were stronger than him. He... didn't respect you, or your loyalties. And that lack of respect cost him."
"Yeah. Maybe." Ken shrugged. He sighed with exhaustion, wondering if, maybe, by some chance, he might actually be able to sleep the last few hours left before dawn.
"Hey, Ken." The darker male smiled, inwardly wondering what it would take to reassure his friend, wondering what it would take to help, "look at me. I'm alive. Thanks to you. And Bison is dead. Thanks to you."
"Yeah, but that doesn't stop him from... haunting me." Ken pouted.
"Don't worry. I'll keep the night demons away tonight." Ryu said as he closed his eyes, reaching over to grab Ken's shoulder affectionately. "After all, what are friends for?"
Ken gave a soft chuckle as he shifted where he slept, unconsciously moving closer to the stronger male. Soon after that, the American fell asleep, the first real sleep he had had since Bison abducted him. Ryu was conscious for sometime after, but eventually he too fell asleep.
-o0o-
Ken opened his eyes, blinking at the new day. He could feel arms wrapped around his waist, and a hard body at his back. There was a moment, the space between heartbeats, when the American male was afraid. It didn't last. Instead, he found his body automatically melting against the figure behind him. He knew, instinctively, that it was Ryu.
He grinned at the feel of ticklish nuzzling at his neck. He suspected that the Japanese warrior had no idea who he was holding, but he also thought that if he woke Ryu up, his friend would be highly embarrassed. He didn't want to do that to Ryu.
Strong arms tightened.
Besides, this was... nice. Comforting.
He wanted to heal, but what did that entail? He understood, better than some, that everything had its price. So what was the price of healing? And what would happen once he was healed, once the nightmares stopped? Would that ever happen? Ken blinked. Of course it would. Last night had been nightmare free, and he had slept peacefully.
In Ryu's arms.
That gave Ken pause. He hadn't shared his bed in a long while, not since the nightmares truly got to him. No one was safe when he was in the thrall of his nightmares; he was just too strong. Females were so delicate. And he hadn't seriously considered taking a male lover.
Ken frowned as he shifted where he lay, managing to get closer to Ryu without trying, thinking. After a moment of chaotic thoughts, he stopped thinking. He was too confused to make sense of anything. Instead, he opened himself to the world around him. He cleared his mind and he simply... felt.
He felt the heat radiating off of Ryu's body. He felt the air in the room. He felt the strength in Ryu's arms. There was more than the physical strength though; also the strength of his spirit. He felt the world around them, opening up like it hadn't since...
Yet this time there was no fear. No malice. No concern. The world was opened to him. Soft sparks danced around him like small stars. And for the first time in a long time, he was comfortable with it.
He had come to Ryu to find himself. To heal. He had thought that he would return to his life after that, return to mindless martial arts tournaments that didn't challenge him, return to the corporate world, but...
But here, out in the middle of nowhere, out where time sometimes forgot to move, it seemed...
It seemed as if he had returned... Returned to a place he had never been before. Returned... home.
What would happen now? Would Ryu... Would Ryu turn him away? The answer was immediate. No. No, Ryu wouldn't turn him away. He knew it. Knew it deep in his soul. They fit so well together.
It felt right.
Ken closed his eyes. He felt whole. He wasn't healed by any means, but he was getting there.
-o0o-
Time slipped away, hidden in the routine that he and Ken quickly recreated. Training day after day, getting into a pattern. Ryu led for the most part, Ken a quiet shadow behind him, growing more vocal as the days turned cooler. They would start the day with warm up exercises, a morning kata, and then chores. Those morning chores were usually along the lines of making breakfast, gathering firewood, chopping wood, hunting for lunch and dinner, gathering greens, and taking stock of their provisions. Midday brought another round of exercises, another kata, a light spar, and then lunch. After that, there was a rest, often times bathing or washing in the river. Since Ryu was a light traveler, he usually washed his clothes in the river every day, and it was on the second day that Ken broke out his old red uniform and started to do likewise. Sometimes, while their clothes were drying, they would swim and play in the water. Other times they would rest. Occasionally they would talk, but there were many evenings when that wasn't needed. After that was another kata, and then dinner.
The change was subtle, like watching grass grow. No one could actually –see- it happen until... until...
It was a day like the one before, the sky clear overhead, and the wind bringing in the smell of earth and water from the nearby marshes. Ken had chopped wood for a cooking fire for later, and Ryu had gone hunting for something to eat. There were the sounds of wildlife near-by, but no animals that they could see. There was a fat hare roasting in a hanging pot while they stood not too far away, practicing.
Ryu had had no expectations for the day. It was simply just another day. Another chance to train. Another chance to re-learn old skills. Another chance to be with Ken.
It was like watching the stars slide across heaven, sliding away from one horizon to the other. One never really saw it until... until...
Ryu bounced in place as he watched for an opening, noticing for the first time that Ken was actually putting up decent defenses. Their movements had a rhythm, a flow to them, so that their combat was more of an intricate dance than a battle. In the beginning, Ryu had intended for their fights to last, intended to keep his speed in check and offer Ken the chance to defend himself. But as the days wore on, he found that he didn't have to keep his speed, or his strength for that matter, in check any more.
Instead, he was allowed to simply move. To open himself up to the experience of fighting his one, true equal. And slowly, Ken began to do the same. Time became meaningless to them. The land around them was their arena, and the world outside of their fighting area didn't exist. They were focused solely on each other. The feel of sweat slicked skin sliding over sweat slicked skin in a defensive block or an offensive punch. The sound of flesh striking flesh, of labored breathing, of hot panting.
Each knew the other's moves. Each knew the other's skills. Each knew the other's strengths and weaknesses.
It was in these moments, these moments when they both opened their minds and simply –went- with it, when they let their instincts take over and their bodies rule them, that their movements seemed the most choreographed. Time seemed to abandon them during these moments. It was in these moments when Ryu felt that life seemed...
... almost perfect.
Ryu, for all of his devotion to training, had experience many pleasures of the flesh in his travels. He had taken others, both male and female, to his bed, and had upon occasion been taken to someone else's bed for a night's lodging and a good meal. One did what one had to in order to survive. And he knew that, in some respects and on some levels, fighting was a great deal like having sex. There was the inherent struggle for power, for dominance, for control. He recognized, though, that all those times he had merely had sex, he had never made love.
And he knew he wouldn't.
Because making love was more than an action, it was a physical expression of a heart-felt emotion. Because making love was something that could only be done with the one person who made him complete.
The scarlet headband that Ryu wore captured the lines of sweat before they could slide into his eyes. The strip of red cloth had been Ken's at one time, and had been given to him when they were children. When it was Ryu who had been hurt, and Ken was the one who wanted to help him heal.
Their dance was intricate, like lace work, a pattern imbedded into their minds from their childhood. There were still opportunities for it to evolve, for their strikes to become harder, for their moves to become faster, for their attacks to become more elaborate and powerful, but the balance that they displayed would be there until one of them surrendered the match. And after weeks of Ryu leading, weeks of Time slipping past them, unnoticed, it was Ken who won.
It was a simple block. His hand snapped through the air and caught Ryu's ankle as the Japanese warrior aimed for a head strike with his foot. But when he did that, the dance froze in mid-motion. The air around them seemed heavy with expectation, as their eyes met.
And Ken grinned.
It wasn't anything astonishing. It wasn't anything spectacular. It was a simple block. And a simple grin. But Ken was fighting back, and parts of his old self were returning. These were all good things. Very good things, things that Ryu wanted. But the darker warrior was reminded that soon, Ken would be healed. And soon, Ken would leave. Ken would leave him.
Ken would leave him behind.
Again.
-o0o-
A soft whimper woke the blond male from a deep sleep. Normally, Ken wouldn't have registered the sound, as soft as silk sliding over skin. But on this night, he heard.
Cautiously, Ken turned where he lay, held from behind by Ryu. The arms around his waist tightened, and the American male was reminded, needlessly, of how strong his companion was, and how sore he was from their constant training. Still, he managed to turn so that he was facing towards Ryu rather than away. Even in the dim light, Ken could see a scowl creasing the darker male's brow.
There was barely enough room between their bodies for their clothes, and absolutely none for modesty, and Ken was faced with the question of where to put his arms. Somehow, Ken managed to slide his arm under Ryu's neck without waking the other male. With his free hand, the blond male began to slowly trace Ryu's features, sliding his forefinger up the bridge of Ryu's nose, to his forehead, and trying to smooth out the fierce expression, before moving on to trace more of his darker features.
Silently, Ken wondered about what his friend was dreaming of. A fight? An enemy? A friend?
Pale fingers moved to trace Ryu's lips.
Ken's mind eagerly switched gears to thoughts that had been plaguing him for weeks. He had been questioning himself, thinking up all kinds of possibilities. Maybe he was responding this way because Ryu was being kind, helping him heal, being the friend that he needed. Maybe it was because Ryu had always seemed so aloof, so in control, so untouchable, that he was somehow safe to have such a strange, unexpected crush on. Maybe it was because they were both there, alone, and his home was an ocean away.
In the end, though, Ken discarded each and every one of them. He knew what attraction was.
And he was beginning to realize what love was. Or rather, he was beginning to realize how deeply in love he was.
He had never kissed another guy before, had never considered it.
He was considering it now.
Maybe Eliza knew, when she tossed his marriage proposal in his face, that he would never love her.
Hesitantly, more than just a little afraid, Ken leaned forward. He wasn't sure what he was doing. Sure, he had kissed females before. But that was different. They were different. This was different.
This was Ryu.
Gently, as soft as shadows moving across the wall, Ken brushed his lips over Ryu's before settling them for a moment. Delicately, though. Carefully.
Only a moment...
Just one moment...
The arms around his waist tightened, and for a heart racing moment, Ken was afraid he had woken Ryu up.
But when he pulled back, the American realized that, no, Ryu was still sleeping. Peacefully.
Ken lay back down, aligning himself against the other male. It was a long while before he fell back to sleep, his thoughts focused on the kiss.
-o0o-
"Hey, Ryu?"
The voice was familiar, etched into him, deeper than his soul, and Ryu automatically responded to it. Dark eyes opened, blinking as the harsh rays of a forgotten sun reminded the Japanese man that it was, indeed, daylight out. He was sitting cross-legged and nude on a large rock by the stream. His and Ken's gi were hanging nearby, drying. Nights were coming quicker, and their days were growing shorter. It was to their advantage to use the warmth of the day for chores and bathing as much as possible, because soon, there wasn't going to –be- any warmth to the days. The evening air was cool, and the rock he was sitting on was far colder, but he had been able to push the physical discomfort away as he meditated.
Still in the water, half floating and half swimming, Ken stared up at the sky, his dark eyebrows drawn down in a slight frown.
"Yeah?"
"I was wondering... what would you say if I told you I wanted to stay here, like this, forever."
Ryu quirked an eyebrow at his friend. "I'd say you'd get very wrinkly staying in the water for too long."
Ken snorted as he moved to the edge of the water, but instead of getting out, he pushed himself up on one of the rocks to sit with his arms crossed over the cold surface. "No, I mean, what would you say if I told you I wanted to stay here, training during the day, and just hanging out with you at night, forever."
When he realized the blond was serious, Ryu took a moment to think about it. Some people, when he took time to actually appraise what they were saying, thought that Ryu took his time because he was mentally slow. But for him, it was a sign of respect that he took his time, mentally evaluating as many possibilities as he could. If it was someone he did not respect, Ryu could have easily have brushed off the question, but there were very few people he would show such a level of disregard to.
For this question, he took a great deal of time.
It was too important, to both of them.
Ryu knew birds would sometimes take very good care of their fledges, and then push them out of the nest, letting them learn the hardest, and most important lessons, on their own. How to survive. How to live. How to fly.
'Is it really that time already? Is it really time for me to push Ken away?' Ryu wondered to himself. He had half hoped that Ken –would- stay with him, even when spring came and it was good to travel again. But he knew that Ken needed to get on with his life, to completely heal. Ken could not stay and hide away from the rest of the world. True, Bison had hurt Ken, both mentally and emotionally, but Ken was still an important person, in charge of an important multi-national company. He couldn't afford to hide.
But could Ryu do this? Could he push Ken back to America, back to where he belonged, back to his family and name and job? Could he do this and survive it? Could he survive the dark –ache- that he felt just thinking about it? 'What is the saying? If you love something, set it free...But how to handle it carefully? I don't want Ken to hate me. I...'
"I would say that you have to remember your other responsibilities. You are an important person." Ryu said after a moment, his emotions betraying themselves by giving him a slight accent. "I would tell you that hiding here with me would not rid you of Bison's ghost completely. And I would tell you that hiding here is cowardly and beneath you. I... I enjoy being with you Ken, but for the next step, you are going to have to do it on your own. You are going to have to go back home and face your demons there."
Ken blinked at him, still partially submerged in the water. For a long moment, there were only the sounds of nature around them. The sounds of squirrels frantically hurrying to bury the last of their winter stash, almost mad in their haste. The sound of the breeze slashing through the underbrush in demented glee at the dead foliage. Cruel in their normalcy. Ryu had known this day was going to come, when Ken realized that he was strong enough to leave again.
And then Ken asked, "What would you do if I left, and then came back?"
Ryu grinned. "Ken, you know I won't be here come spring. This place is just temporary. Every place is temporary. You are where you are, and you do what you have to. To learn. To grow. To fly."
"What if I hunted you down and joined you in your traveling?" Ken smiled, but there was something in his eyes that made Ryu just a little unsure. Just a little.
"Then I'd welcome your companionship." Ryu answered honestly. "You're always welcomed to be with me, Ken."
"Always?"
"Always." There was no question to that, just a statement of fact. Water was wet, fire was hot, and Ken... Ryu would eagerly accept Ken's companionship, no matter where they were going, no matter what they were doing. No matter what kind of trouble Ken got them in. The blond would always be a welcomed sight.
Ken paused and tilted his head, his wet hair sliding and shifting. In complete seriousness, he asked, "Even if I did something incredibly shocking, something amazingly stupid, you wouldn't turn me away?"
Ryu eyed his friend, wondering what Ken was up to now. "Ken, I've known you almost my entire life. I can't remember a time when I –didn't- know you. And during the course of that time, I've known you to do some pretty stupid things. And I haven't turned you away yet."
-o0o-
Ken looked around, already knowing that he had all of his belongings packed in the small duffle bag he carried. There was nothing left to find, to clean, to pack. Nothing that he was going to leave behind.
Except Ryu.
Still, it was time to go. He had already pushed his luck to the wall. Winter was almost there, and when it hit, getting to the boats that would take him to the mainland, and then taking a train to a bus to the airport, would be extremely difficult.
It was just... he didn't want to leave.
And yet, here he was, doing just that. He slung his duffle bag over his shoulder, and turned to Ryu, who stood standing beside the door with his arms crossed.
"Well..." Ken started, but found that he wasn't able to continue. He wanted to stay. And he knew he shouldn't. Ryu was right. He needed to face his demons. All of them. No matter where they hid. He took deep breath and walked slowly over to where Ryu stood. He put one hand on Ryu's shoulder, and felt his stomach fall to his feet as Ryu pulled him close for a friendly hug. "Ryu, will you promise me something?"
The Japanese male quirked an eyebrow as he drew back. "You know I will."
"Will you promise me that you'll wait until the first day of spring before you leave here, if you want me to travel with you?"
Ryu nodded, confusion showing in his eyes. "Sure. You got it, Ken."
With the promise extracted, Ken nodded. And then, before Ken could lose his nerve, and Ryu could react; the blond American closed his eyes and moved forward, pressing his lips against the other male's.
Ken waited for Ryu to stiffen, to push him away. He expected it. Instead, he felt large, strong hands hesitantly, -hesitantly-, move to cup his face. Tilting his head, just ever so slightly.
And the kiss deepened.
Ken's duffle bag hit the ground with a soft thud, but neither one noticed.
The blond male gasped at the feel, the taste, of Ryu's kiss. He... He hadn't expected... This... This was good.
Very good.
Very...right.
The kiss broke, and Ken stumbled back. He felt out of breath, and he knew he was blushing. He took pleasure in noting that he wasn't the only one affected, though. Ryu's eyes were dark, and the look in his eyes... It caused him to tremble. He wanted... "You'll be here, first day of spring?"
"I promise. I'll wait." Ryu nodded slowly, his voice soft, not moving from where he stood. "I'll wait for you. I've been waiting this long, a little longer isn't going to hurt."
"Ryu..." Ken picked up the strap to his duffle bag with shaking hands. He used his back to push out of the door, even as he swore, "I promise you, I'll be back by the first day of spring."
Ken walked out the door, already planning his return.
Fini