Reaching Maturity
Disclaimer: You know they never were mine and that they never will be mine
A/N: well, here we are! We have finally reached the end of this (rather long) fic! The epilogue itself is about 1,300 words long, so I'm pretty certain it's the shortest chapter in this fic! At the bottom you'll find out what's wrong with Draco.
Author responses to chapter 31:
Whinging and whining are essentially the same thing. I went to a dictionary and found the following. Whine: an instance of feeble or undignified complaining; a complaining long-drawn wail as of a dog. Whinge: whine; grumble peevishly; a peevish grumble.
Lucidity: funny you should say that about the twins…You haven't really got access to the sequel, have you? It's just that in the sequel, I have one of them (I think it's George) as an officially-recognised Potions Master!
Sirius does still need to grow up. But his excuse will be that he spent his twenties (the time of a man's life in which it's socially acceptable for him to get drunk) in Azkaban, so he's making up for lost time now. Somehow, though, I don't think that will go down too well with Remus! I really enjoyed writing the closing scene of 31, just for the humorous, post-party hangover content! If you read my fic Inebriation in Mirkwood, you'll find that Glorfindel's levels of sympathy towards Elrond are rather similar to Remus' towards Sirius in this fic! The way I see it, if you go out and get smashed, a hangover serves you right!
I have no issues with 70s music (although I prefer the Sixties, which is the music I was brought up on, courtesy of my mum, and yes, the Beatles ROCK – although I'm more a Simon & Garfunkel person), but the characters do. I can see Sirius in very loud flares!
I tend to do a bit of what JK does with the whole names thing. With me, if there's someone I don't like, a variation on their name could appear in one of my stories. Carrie is a play on Garry Flitcroft, who used to play for Blackburn Rovers, the archrivals and bitter enemies of the club I support (Burnley) – the two towns are but 8 miles apart – so variations on Blackburn players' names have a tendency to work their way into my stories! I'm sure there's probably Blackburn fans out there who do something similar with Burnley players' names, as well as fans of other clubs with their bitter rivals! And while on the subject of names, you can't not have a Slytherin whose surname is Rickman! Couldn't resist!
TinorialPeredhil: perhaps I should take away your sugar supply…?
Seamus is 18, so he is legally allowed to drink alcohol. I now have the vaguest notions of an idea of perhaps writing a fic involving a drunk Minerva…
Padfoot in Purple: do you have any idea how red you've made my face go! I'm working (a bit) on my debut novel, so whether or not anything comes to fruition remains to be seen.
Finally, thank you all SO SO SO SO SO much, kind readers and reviewers! It's been a marathon (over 8 months)! And only 3 weeks till HBP comes out!
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Chapter 32: Epilogue
Three days later, the four were gathered by the river, enjoying a picnic lunch prepared by Hannah, ever the domestic one of the foursome. It had been her idea and the others had welcomed it enthusiastically. It was warm and sunny, and the sky was a gorgeous blue and cloud free, and a light, cool breeze prevented the weather from being unpleasantly hot and sticky.
"Remember the last time we had a picnic by water?" asked Hannah, her hand unconsciously straying to her wand, which was safely in her pocket. She shuddered involuntarily as some of the memories from the battle came unbidden into her mind. Shaking her head, she forced them away.
Hermione nodded grimly. "Vividly," she assured her.
"How could I forget?" added Draco softly, mentally fighting off unpleasant, invasive memories. He was leaning against a tree by the riverbank, left hand idly trailing in the clear water. He was still tired from Harry's party and as a result was unable to do much. It had been a struggle for him to make it out today – partly because of Madam Pomfrey, who had popped in briefly the day after Harry's party to check on hangovers. She had ordered Draco to be far more careful about overdoing things because he was on the verge of having a relapse. He had dutifully agreed; he hated being so exhausted all the time.
Pomfrey had started to talk about him seeing someone at St. Mungo's about it, stating that although she was no expert, she was beginning to seriously consider the possibility of it being chronic fatigue syndrome. The symptoms all fit, she had said. Draco had been quite willing to let her make the contact with the hospital; for him, having a firm diagnosis would make it easier to deal with.
It had been hard work persuading her to allow him to come on this picnic. He still suffered from horrific nightmares, which had showed no signs of easing yet, despite seeing a psychiatrist. In the end he had told Pomfrey that as she wasn't staying at Lupin's for the whole day, there was nothing she could do to force him to stay indoors and in bed.
"The war's not over yet," Harry reminded them soberly. "There are still trials to take place, evidence to be given, sentences to pass…And if that letter Draco got has got even the slightest grain of truth in it…"
"I don't know if I could withstand another battle," said Draco quietly, staring down at the grass. "I don't feel like I'm ever going to completely recover; if I haven't done by now, which I haven't, it's unlikely that I ever will. Pomfrey – Pomfrey said that another battle like that would almost definitely kill me if a cast spell doesn't. It's hell, and I hate it." His eyes fluttered closed in obvious weariness.
The others were silent. Draco never talked about his illness – it was the way he had been brought up that had made him like that – but it soon became apparent that he was not going to say any more today.
"You know, it was odd to see Snape and Lupin being nice to each other for once," commented Hermione, starting a daisy chain.
"You have to admit, though, Sirius does make himself a pretty easy target for ridicule when he's hung-over," replied Harry, smirking. The others laughed in agreement, and Harry reached out, taking Hermione's hand. "I'm glad we'll be living in our own home soon. Much as I like Lupin's, it's not my home."
"I know what you mean," said Hannah, nodding. "Draco and I aren't leaving for another month. But at least once we have got our own homes, we'll be really close to each other. I love Godric's Hollow. I couldn't have lived in the Manor; it's far too isolated and bleak."
"The area's decent enough!" Draco shot back defensively. "It was just the actual house that I couldn't have lived in. Not after what my father put me through for so long. There are far too many bad memories in that place." He paused. "You know, I often wonder what happened to some of the Slytherins after the battle. Pansy and Millicent we know about; they're being dealt with by the Ministry. But then there's people like Blaise Zabini –"
"Did he not die?" asked Hermione, surprised.
"No; I only Stunned him. I didn't hang around. He could easily have got away." He ran his fingers through his hair. "When we faced each other, out there… The look in his eyes was evil – pure evil. I've only ever seen that look in one other person, and that was my father."
"That sounds ominous," commented Hermione.
Draco shrugged. "I don't know. It's not like he was a particularly good student; I can't imagine he'd make a very good Dark Lord."
"They can be the worst ones sometimes," pointed out Harry. "Like Peter Pettigrew. Look at what he did."
"He can't ever do anything again," Hermione reminded him. "Not now he's received the Dementor's Kiss." She shuddered as she imagined it being performed. She wasn't sure she would wish that fate on anybody. She knew that she would rather die than continue to exist as a shell, without a soul.
"Sirius is just annoyed that he never got to commit the murder he served twelve years in Azkaban for," observed Hannah, smiling.
"He'll just have to get over it, then," said Hermione sensibly.
"As you said, Pettigrew can't ever do anything to anyone again," added Draco. He idly flicked his wand at Hannah, showering her with leaves.
Hannah, in response, leaned over and pushed him into the river.
"Hey!" he yelled as he surfaced, spluttering, startled by the sudden drenching in cold water.
"We've got our swimming stuff on," replied Hannah, shrugging. "Why are you objecting?"
Draco hauled himself out of the river with Hermione's help. "Maybe the fact that I'm still fully dressed?" His grey eyes glittered dangerously.
Hannah pulled her T-shirt off to reveal a yellow swimsuit with a badger embroidered on the left-hand side just below the shoulder strap. She kicked her sandals off, dropped her skirt on top of her T-shirt and slipped into the water. "Ooooh, it's lovely and cool. Come on, you lot!"
Hermione did not need to be asked twice. Thick, bushy hair tied up out of her face, she slipped her strappy blue top and denim shorts off to reveal a swimsuit similar to Hannah's, only red in colour and bearing a lion instead of a badger. The House swimsuits had become very popular in their sixth year, when Madam Pomfrey had declared that the school's general fitness levels were appalling and that more students should do sports. Swimming had rapidly become the most popular sport after Quidditch – nothing would ever become more popular than Quidditch!
The (now former) Head Girl assisted Draco in draping his soaked clothes on the nearby bushes. They were already starting to dry in the hot sun, she observed, before gracefully slipping into the water to join Hannah. "Hurry up, you two!" she hollered at the boys.
Harry and Draco exchanged conspiratorial looks. The girls shrieked as two loud splashes sounded when the boys jumped in as violently as they could manage, drenching their fiancées. "That," Draco declared as Hannah splashed him, "is revenge for pushing me in!"
"Then what did I do to deserve such treatment?" demanded Hermione indignantly.
Harry responded simply by splashing her, and it quickly descended into a free-for-all water fight in the river.
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Unbeknown to the four, Dumbledore and Sirius were watching them – Lupin's attic provided an excellent view over the river and the surrounding countryside. The headmaster turned to the former fugitive. "Let them have their fun, Sirius. There is still much left in the world for them to do. They need this."
Sirius nodded in agreement, a contemplative expression on his face. "I don't doubt you there, Albus," he said quietly. "I don't doubt you there at all. But this chapter in their books is over."
"And it is time for a new and completely different one to begin." Dumbledore chuckled. "Oh, we shall enjoy watching them!"
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THE END
Author notes
I promised you all that I would tell you what was wrong with Draco at the end of this fic, and I have kept that promise. Although not yet diagnosed officially, he is suffering from chronic fatigue syndrome (sometimes known as ME).
The exact cause of CFS is currently unknown, although a number of possible triggers have been identified. The main triggers that have been identified are a combination of viral infections, significant internal and external stressors, and overwork. A minor illness may then act as the final precipitating event (the straw that broke the camel's back, as it were) that tips the person into ill-health.
In the same way as the triggering of the illness by certain factors, there will be perpetuators of the illness, which are often similar to the triggers – usually stress and recurrent infections, and the patterns that can develop in response to the symptoms. Therefore, once a state of fatigue has become established, cognitive, behavioural, emotional, psychological and social factors may act to perpetuate it (eg. unhelpful beliefs, ineffective coping behaviour, negative mood states, social problems, pathophysiological processes). A vicious cycle then ensues, trapping the person in chronic illness. The best way to describe activity patterns is peaks and troughs.
CDC criteria (1994)
New onset of self-reported persistent or relapsing, debilitating fatigue in a person who has no previous history of similar symptoms, that has lasted for 6 months or longer, is disabling and affects physical and mental functioning and: is characterised by fatigue as the principal symptom; is of new or definite onset (not lifelong); is not the result of ongoing exertion; is not substantially alleviated by rest; results in substantial reduction in previous levels of occupation, educational, social or personal activities.
Other clinical conditions that may produce similar symptoms, including pre-existing psychiatric diseases, must be excluded. These conditions will include: any active medical condition; any previously diagnosed medical condition whose continued activity may explain the illness, such as previously treated malignancies and unresolved cases of hepatitis B or C infection; any past or current diagnosis of major depressive disorder, including bipolar affective disorder (manic depression), schizophrenia, delusional disorders, dementia, anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa; alcohol or substance abuse within 2 years; severe obesity.
Four or more of the following symptoms must be concurrently present for 6 or more months: impaired concentration or memory; sore throat; tender cervical or axillary lymph nodes; muscle pain; multi-joint pain without joint swelling or redness; headaches of a new type, pattern or severity; unrefreshing sleep; post-exertional malaise lasting more than 24 hours.
This information comes from:
Cox, Diane L. (2000). Occupational Therapy and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. London: Whurr Publishers.
(Diane was one of my lecturers – she's still at St. Martin's but I'm leaving on Monday – and you're very unlikely to come across anything to do with OT and CFS that hasn't got at least one reference to something she's done! She's great).