Disclaimer:

We are on our way to owning Riddick again!

We see our beloved authoress'es sneaking into a secret lair where the scary evil lawyers are holding Riddick hostage.

Spoongirl: I don't know if this is the best idea, Kermit.

Kermit: Are you losing faith in me? How can you not trust me!

Spoongirl: I do trust you, but...

Kermit: But what?

Spoongirl: I don't know. It just feels bad.

Kermit: hmmm. I know what will make you feel better.

Spoongirl: What?

Kermit: Look over there.

Spoongirl turns and sees a teenaged Johnny Depp tied to a chair in a room on their left.

Spoongirl: SQUEE! Oh can we take him home? Please?

Kermit: Sure, but I wonder why he looks so young.

Spoongirl runs over and unties him.

Johnny Depp: Thank you girls so much. I don't know what happened. One minute I'm on the set of Pirates of the

Caribbean 2 and then I woke up here in this body.

Spoongirl: We don't know either, but do you want to come with us to save Riddick? I'm sure we could use your cool swishy sword fighting at some point in time.

Johnny: Sure. Just get me out of here!

The girls give Johnny a cool spy suit like theirs and they all run off in search of Riddick.

What will happen next? Who else will Kermit and Spoongirl find along the way? Will they ever save Riddick?

More next time, preceding the story as usual.

Oh and thank you to all our loverly reviewers. You guys rock our socks! Candy and Riddick action figures for everyone!

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"Do I even want to know who they are?" Carolyn asked Riddick, pointing at the two girls.

Riddick glanced at them and shook his head slightly.

"Well do you think you could get them to leave?"

Kermit scowled at her and Spoongirl growled and clung harder to Riddick's leg.

He shook his head again.

"Damn straight." Kermit said.

Spoongirl looked at her and they both grinned.

"All right. So where's the body?"

Riddick didn't even bother to look at her and a heavy silence hung in the air.

"Well do you want to tell me about the sounds?"

He shrugged.

"Look you told Johns you heard something."

Spoongirl and Kermit's smiles grew at his unresponsiveness.

"Fine. You don't want to talk to me, that's your choice. But just so you know, there's a debate right now, whether as to leave you here to die."

"You mean the whispers?"

Kermit and Spoongirl squealed loudly and Riddick turned to look at them, raiding an eyebrow.

Muttering apologies, they backed away into a corner, but their eyes were still fixed on Riddick.

Carolyn had been about to leave, but she turned back at the sound of Riddick's voice.

"What whispers?"

"The ones telling me to go for the sweet spot, just left of the spine, fourth lumbar down. The abdominal aorta. It's a metallic taste, human blood, copperish. But if you cut it with peppermint schnapps, it goes away ---"

"Do you want to shock me with the truth now?"

Carolyn's voice was sharp and Kermit and Spoongirl smiled smugly, both knowing that Riddick had in fact gotten to

her.

"All you people are so scared of me." He looked over at Spoongirl and Kermit, who grabbed each other and giggled.

"Except them. Now most days, I'd take that as a compliment. But it ain't me you gotta worry about now."

Carolyn licked her lips nervously and when she spoke her voice was unnaturally quiet.

"Show me your eyes, Riddick."

"You'd have to come a lot closer for that."

Her footsteps seemed to ring out loudly as she took a few small steps towards him.

"Closer."

She wiped her sweaty palms on her pants and let out a shaky breath.

Carolyn was about to take one final step towards him, when Riddick leapt up, the chains stopping him a few inches away from her face.

The two girls in the corner shrieked and Spoongirl fell over backwards, gasping in hysterical laughter.

"Where the hell can I get eyes like that?"

They all turned to see Jack standing near the entrance of the wreck.

Kermit made a horrible face at Jack, but Spoongirl patted her hand soothingly.

"You gotta kill a few people."

"Ok, I can do it."

"No, she can't," whispered Kermit.

"Then you gotta get sent to a slam where they tell you, you'll never see daylight again. You dig up a doctor and pay him twenty menthol KOOLS to do a surgical shine job on your eyeballs."

"So you can see who's sneaking up on you in the dark?" Jack said, with a devilish smile.

"Well duh, Captain Obvious." Spoongirl muttered.

"Exactly."

"Leave! Leave."

Carolyn's words were short and the girls could tell that she didn't want Jack around Riddick.

Jack left, but not before making it known that she would rather spend her time with Riddick than with anyone else.

"Cute kid." Riddick said, watching Jack's retreating form.

Kermit growled, but Spoongirl put an arm around her shoulder.

"Don't worry," she whispered. "We both know she dies in the next movie."

Kermit smiled maliciously and they both turned their attentions back to Riddick.

"Did I kill a few people? Sure. Did I kill Zeke? No. You've got the wrong killer."

"He's not in the hole. We looked."

"Look deeper.'

Carolyn turned and stormed outside.

Riddick settled back into his seat and looked at the two girls, giving them a brief smile.

"Why don't you go outside and see what happens? I want to know all the gory details."

Spoongirl and Kermit nodded eagerly and ran outside after Carolyn.

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By the time Kermit and spoongirl has caught up with Carolyn, she was already talking to the remaining survivors.

Kermit noticed that Jack was checking out the spire-like towers of dirt, near where Zeke had disappeared.

She snuck up behind the unsuspecting girl and was about to push her in when, spoongirl realized what she was trying to do and pulled her away before she succeeded in pushing Jack down the hole.

"Kermit, you're not allowed to kill Jack," said spoongirl in one of her rare moments of complete sanity.

"Why not?" Kermit grumbled. "She's stupid and annoying and I think we'd all benefit from her dying."

"We can't kill her because she saves Riddick's life in the next movie. We need her around for that, so our sexy

Riddick doesn't die. Besides she gets killed at the end of the movie remember?"

"Yeah...."

"All right. How about when or if that is, we get home, we write a nice fanfic about her dying in a lot horrible ways and us having good times with Riddick and him not caring she dies, instead of going all broody in the film...even though a broody Riddick is a sexy Riddick. Would that make you feel better?"

"I guess."

Johns finally realized that he had never seen the two girls before. Looking at them curiously, he turned back to Carolyn.

"Who are they?"

"Friends of Riddick."

"Should we chain them up? I mean, I've never seen them before and we don't know if they're dangerous."

"Somehow, I don't think tying them up along with Riddick would help any. But that doesn't matter right now...we have to find out what happened to Zeke. I'm going to go down the hole."

"So you're gonna risk you're neck, just because Riddick told you there was something down there. He's a killer, Carolyn, and he would love to see you in danger. It's what turns him on."

"Well he's the only one who seems to know anything, so I'm going to take his word this time."

Spoongirl nodded solemnly. "That's a good idea. You people should really listen to Riddick. Then less of you would wind up dying."

Carolyn and Johns stared at her for a minute and then Carolyn shook her head and looked back at Johns.

"So are you going to help or not? Because I'm going down there, either way."

Johns nodded slowly like he was thinking hard. "Fine."

Flashlight in hand, Carolyn was slowly lowered down into the hole, via a chain attached to her belt.

"You ever notice that when a person in a movie goes into somewhere dark with a flashlight, things never turn out well?" Kermit mused, watching the woman being carefully lowered down.

"Hmm... that's true. I never thought about it that way. Like in so many stupid horror movies, when the people are in the car and then it breaks down and then they hear creepy noises and the boyfriend goes into the dark woods to check stuff out and then doesn't come back...and all they find is a bloody flashlight."

"Don't think I've seen that movie."

"It's just an example," spoongirl said, absent-mindedly kicking the dirt spire.

Sand and small rocks rained down into the hole and a muffled yell came from somewhere beneath them.

Johns glared at Spoongirl.

"Knock it off, girl or you'll be ending up where Riddick is."

Of course, this didn't help matter much.

Meanwhile, Carolyn finally reached the bottom of the tunnel, spire-thingy.

She dusted herself off, while peering into the darkness with the flashlight.

Something caught her eye and she swung the flashlight over in the object's direction.

As it came into the light, she gasped in horror.

There was a boot, with part of the leg sill inside it.

She reached out towards it, not wanting to touch it, but at the same time wanting to see if it belonged to Zeke, when a spiked tail stabbed into the leg and yanked it into the darkness.

She swung her flashlight in the direction the tail had come from and saw something slither across the wall of the cave.

Oh god. Riddick was right. There was something down there with her.

Eerie noises came from behind her, but when she pointed her light in the direction of the sounds, there was nothing there.

She had to get out of there.

Running to the nearest tunnel, she braced her hands on the walls and started to pull herself up.

"Somebody help me. I'm in here!"

Spoongirl glanced at her watch and then looked at the dirt towers.

"Its almost time that Carolyn realizes that Riddick was right and tries to get out of the hole, but the creatures try to pull her back. You think we should let 'em know, so they can save her?"

Kermit wrinkled her nose and shook her head. "No. It's more fun to watch them run around blindly as they try to figure out where she is."

Spoongirl laughed. "Yeah. Like scared little ants."

Kermit looked at spoongirl seriously. " I like ants though. Long live the ants! They're after someone's flicked on the light and they all go scurrying around."

Spoongirl shrugged. "Okay. Like scared little cockroaches then."

They turned back to the hole, as Carolyn cried out for help from within again.

"Oh god, somebody help me!"

She was so close and at the same time, so far away.

The two girls looked at each other and grinned evilly.

Heeheehee! Evil us! You think you know what happens, but now we're behind the wheel (and neither one of us have our drivers licenses) Does she get to live or will we kill her off? Maybe she'll just get horribly maimed beyond recognition

(Spoongirl: I think I read that in another fanfic once. That was a good fanfic.... hehe maimed Carolyn....)

But anyway, when you enter our universe, you never know what'll happen!

MUAH-HA-HA!

(Ps monkeys rule! And so do monkey pants and monkey fists)

Oh yes and we are sorry if the dialogue and sequence of events seems a little off in the second half, but spoongirl is the only one who owns the dvd and she was too busy studying for exams to watch it and get the dialogue right.

So unless you can think of a way to get rid of exams...it'll have to stay the way it is!

Happy Holidays everybody!