Disclaimer: Need I say more?
Chapter 1: Go Fish
"Mom? Why are there strange men taking away my stuff?"
"I forgot to tell you, didn't I? You got married this afternoon!"
"WHAAAAT?!?"
Kagome sulked at the kitchen table as she waited for her mother to finish pouring tea. 'How the hell can I be married? I can't even keep a boyfriend for crying out loud! There was no ceremony! There was no ring! Hell, is this even LEGAL?'
She was jarred out of her thoughts by a smiley face mug and her mother seating herself across the table from her.
"You may want to be sitting down, dear."
"I am sitting down."
"Drink your tea."
"Not thirsty."
"Would you like something to eat?"
"Not hungry."
"How about-"
"No."
Her mother sighed, "Very well. You know about your grandfather's little gambling problem..."
"Doesn't everyone?"
"Please, dear. Let me finish. He was playing cards with Mr. Inutaisho again..."
"The guy he wagered Buyo against and lost?"
"Now, Kagome, you know he won Buyo back, so don't hold a grudge," she sipped her tea, blowing on it's surface lightly. Kagome's brow furrowed.
"If what I think happened, really happened, I'll kill him. Slowly."
"Don't jump to conclusions, Kagome." Her mother set her mug down, "Now where was I?"
"Inutaisho."
"Ah, yes. Inutaisho. Right. Well, your grandfather was playing cards against him last night."
"We've established that."
"Good," Kagome's mother stood to clear away her empty mug, and Kagome's forgotten one. However, Kagome stood, slamming her hands down on the tabletop abruptly, interrupting any sort of escape the woman may have.
"You're avoiding me! Why is all my stuff being taken away?!? Did he bet all my belongings for some twisted reason? What happened?!?"
Her mother gave an earth-rending sigh and sank back into her chair, "Your grandfather wagered your hand in marriage to his son."
"...And?"
"...And lost."
"He's DEAD!" Kagome began to storm off.
"Kagome! Wait! That's not all." She turned and watched her mother fumble around in her pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She slid it across the tabletop towards her daughter. Kagome picked it up, unfolded it, and scanned the page, slumping into her chair as all the bones in her body decided to turn liquid in shock.
"This is..."
"The marriage certificate."
"But how..."
"Forged."
"...Aspirin?"
"We're out. I've already checked."
"Great," Kagome stared at the paper, willing the ink delicately placed on it to fall off the page and a hidden message of 'HA HA FOOLED YOU!' to blossom outwards. Needless to say, it didn't happen., "This can't be real. I mean, there's supposed to be love! Romance! A floofy white dress! I don't even have a ring!"
Her mother fished around in her pocket again for a second, then tossed a small object at her. She caught it, and stared at the offending projectile.
It was a cheap plastic monstrosity, with a band of painted silver, and a misshapen blob of purple as it's "rock". She recalled seeing something like it in a quarter machine at the local grocery store.
"You've GOT to be kidding."
At this point, Grandpa unwisely made the decision to enter the room, donning a party hat in celebration for the 'wonderous' occasion. He blew a party horn.
"Kagome! Just the one I was looking for! My granddaughter has grown so much! Don't you think so, Aya?"
Her mother nodded defeatedly as said granddaughter glared daggers at her grandfather.
"I hate you."
"Really. It's not as bad as it seems!"
"Convince me."
"He's a really nice boy!"
"Uh-huh."
"He's about a year or so older than you, and he works for a nearby construction company. I hear he's quite the looker!"
"Riiiight..."
"This will work out wonderfully."
"Mmmm-hmm. Like the time when you lost both my life savings and Souta's? Or Mom's car so she had to walk five miles to work everyday? Or maybe like Grandma's burial plot, THE DAY AFTER HER FUNERAL!!!" Kagome was in fight/lash out/kill the old man mode.
He shrugged, "She wanted to be cremated anyway."
If Kagome hadn't been sitting already, the off-handed way in which he made the remark would have knocked her onto her bum. As it was, the dark aura that was building around her began to drain away, and her glowing red eyes began to turn into their normal color. She blinked.
"I- I can't believe you..."
" You're his wife now."
"Wha- NO!"
"Your new home is waiting."
"I NEVER AGREED T-"
Grandpa pulled the irate woman to her feet and began to usher her out the door and into the hallway, "You need to get packed."
"BUT-"
He shoved her down the hallway to her room, "You're moving in tonight!"
"HOW-"
"Hurry. We're leaving soon." And without any further delay, Kagome found herself propelled into her room with the door slammed shut and the unmistakable click of a lock behind her.
"YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!" She screamed, pounding on the door.
Her mother's voice appeared on the other side of the door, "Kagome, please," she pleaded.
Kagome settled with a frustrated scream and throwing her pillows at the door with satsifying thunps. Meanwhile, on the other side....
"Are you sure this is such a good idea?"
"Of course, Aya," Grandpa patted her on the shoulder, "How else am I going to get great-grandchildren?"
"You do have a point..."
'This is absolutely crazy!!' Kagome thought as she continued to fill her suitcase. 'How could this happen? Why me? When did he find time to put an outside lock on my door?'
There was a sharp knock, and her mother slipped into the room, quietly closing the door behind her, "I'm happy that you're taking this well, honey."
Kagome snorted in a very unladylike manner, "Well. Right."
"Just think of this as an adventure." She sat on the bed next to the almost full suitcase.
Kagome shot her a cynical look and proceeded to shove a pair of jeans into the suitcase.
"It's like a fairy tale," her mother continued, getting entirely too into her ramblings, "You know! Like the ones where the beautiful princess is involved in an arranged marriage and when she finally meets the prince it turns out that they're perfect for eachother and they live happily ever after..." She trailed off, building the fantasy in her mind, stars beginning to glow in her eyes.
"Yeah," Kagome managed to bite out, voice dripping with bitterness, "And if they didn't, they died of horrible fiery deaths." She snapped the suitcase shut for emphasis.
"Kagome!"
"What?!" She looked her startled mother square in the eye, this had been bothering her for quite some time, and it was time for it to come out, "How do I know what he's like? What if he's abusive? What if he's an alcoholic? What if he's some sort of drug addict? What if he's an abusive, alcoholic, drug addict? I don't know! I've just been thrown into this, and I can't do a thing about it!"
She fought back frustrated tears. She would not cry! She would NOT cry! She WOULD NOT-! Too late. Warm arms wrapped around her shoulders, squeezing gently. "Kagome," her mother offered a heartfelt smile, "I'm sure that things will turn out in the end."
Kagome sniffled, "Sure. I'll just keep telling myself that."
"I'm going to miss you around the house."
"The only reason I'm still around the house is because that man lost my apartment to that Kagura woman," she mumbled.
"I'm happy for you."
"Let's just get this over with."
Kagome stood on the front lawn, staring at the nice sized building. 'Well...it doesn't look too bad...' Her mother tugged on her arm.
"Are you going to stand out here all day? Come on!"
The movers had unceremoniously piled her belongings in the middle of the living room. From her spot in the front doorway, Kagome could also see a fair-sized kitchen and a hallway that disappeared somewhere off to her left. She stepped inside and approached the hallway. There she found the master bath, the master bedroom, and two guestrooms. Picking a roof for herself, she began to haul her stuff into it, with the help of Grandpa and her mother.
When everything was in her new habitat, her mother glanced at her watch, "Kagome-dear, I have to go get your brother from his friend's house, and your Grandpa has to go close up the shrine. Will you be okay?"
Kagome smiled meekly, picking up the subliminal message 'You won't go and kill yourself the moment we leave will you?' "I guess. Can you come back later? I need someone to drive me to the mechanic's to pick up my car before it gets too late."
She nodded, "I can do that. And I'll bring Souta, too." She kissed her daughter on the forehead, "Bye, sweetie." And they left.
Kagome sighed. Great. Now she was alone in an empty house that was now making spooky, empty noises but would not be empty because she was married, and her new husband was supposed to show up at any minute. Oh, hell.
"Well," she remarked to no one in particular, "Might as well get settled..."
'Now where was that Tylenol...'
A/N: I've been planning this one for soooooo long! And I finally got the time to type the chapter! Whoo! And it's my birthday tomorrow! So a nice present would be a review! They help me write! I end everything with exclamation points! Review, onegai?