Lisa Loud's Funtime Machine by Omega Ultra (and associates) has recently concluded, but in an incredibly flattering move added an epilogue based/taking details from my Oneshot. It is an entertaining little romp, so I decided the most fitting thing to do would be to make another ficlet based on said epilogue in the same way :)

Of course I should point that this has a different continuity from the previous ficlets features in my Oneshot Collection, and that the entirely empthasised sections that don't denote thought or emphasis were primarily written by Nuuo as we bandied ideas between us.

Most of the entries were originally part of my Oneshots Collection, but since they have become a story of their own they don't really count as 'Oneshots' anymore, and were nearly taking over that Collection so they have been parcelled out into here. Any future installments will only be placed into this story as well.

I should also point out that after this first chapter, the writing shifts to a more stable story format with more focus on humour coming from character interactions and a more solid writing style with longer chapters after chapter 2. The story also features the 'family' element as a prominent focus after chapter 1, so for more straight humour in the same vein as this first chapter please consider my Oneshot Collection or Alone Time Denied! for a read over :)

With all that out of the way, please enjoy the story.

Lisa Loud's Funtime Machine: Months after the epilogue:

"DON'T BLAME ME! YOU DID THIS TO YOURSELF!"

"Still Lincoln, why did you donate your jizz again? You knew Lisa was gonna do something dumb like this."

"Ha ha, well..." Lincoln looks on nervously as Lisa practices her lamaze breathing. "Lisa here asked for more samples in exchange to use her VR Goggles again, ha ha, funny right?"

"You donated your sperm, TO USE LISA'S MASTRUBATION MACHINE AGAIN!"

"Hey- you jumped on the machine again too!"

"I had a good reason!"

"So did I; I really, really, really, like futa."

"LUNA! I BLAME YOU THE MOST FOR THIS! I'M GOING TO BURN! BLARNEY!"

"Oh c'mon, that was years ago!" Luna protested. "You can'r-"

"SWEET AZIMOV'S ANUS!" The scientist wailed. as she attempted to push out child three of four "THIS. IS. AGONIZING!"

"You get what you FUCKING deserve Leese!" Lola cackled.

"Not until she's passed ours she hasn't," growled Lori, her several month swollen belly jumping a bit with a kick. Apparently being told off the first time hadn't stuck. "The second her uterus is functional we're all using that teleport thing to stick the REST in too."

"I'm not sure that's a good idea," counted Lincoln. "I mean; the rest of you are pretty far along now anyway and we don't know-"

"Brah, do you wanna see if you can fit 'em in instead?" The twin bearing Luna glared at him, her accent rough with salt. " 'Cause the ones in there are on 'er, but you gave 'er the jizz the second an' other times knowin' what she was up to so these are on you too."

"Yeah, let's see if we can't make history!" Lana grinned.

"He- you all went back on the machine knowing she'd probably try this again too!" Protested the outnumbered man.

"So it's OUR fault Bruv, is that it?" The hormonal rocker glared at him.

"Oh come on you guys," the happily pregnant Lily giggled. "You're being butts about this, it's way better than you're making it out to be!"

"Also you knocked up Lily!" Lori snapped. "Three! Times! If we didn't need you for a fucking babysitter (forever) we'd literally have a made a lynch mob already."

"Or just castrated you," Luan hummed, horrifically widened with quintuplets because combining apparently homing sperm with Loud Girl ovaries was fucking evil. "You know, unload the gun..."

"Oh I get it!" Leni giggled. "Because Linky's Little Linky's seeds are-"

"We all understand Leni," Lori reassured her. "Of course, I don't see why we don't actually do that anyway- it's not like Ronnie Anne wants them anymore-"

Lincoln sweated bullets. "Okay first, a low blow about Ronnie, secondly-"

"It's a low blow for a reason," Lori smirked as she pulled some scissors from her purse. "GET HIM GIRLS!"

Lincoln yelped and promptly ran off, narrowly dodging half a dozen grasping hands and their waddling owners.

"Girls come on!" Lily whinged. "You just haven't felt the stuff in you properly, just it a chance; it'll change your life!"

"IT ALREADY HAS!" A horde shouted back.

Lily just shook her head, if only they tried the stuff directly they might have understood they trying to cook the golden goose. Beside her Lisa still screamed.

"ARGHH! YOU DID THIS TO ME!"

"They're gone now."

"YO- oh," suddenly the screaming stopped, but the flushed checks and sweat remained upon the scientist. "It seems I am somewhat distracted at the moment, thank you Lily. My trachea was becoming inflamed."

"It's fine, but when are you planning on telling them about your... 'happy birthday'?"

"Ahh," Lisa calmly raised a finger. "That is an excellent shorthand, but the actual name is-"

"Orgasmic Birth Serum?" Lily guessed.

"Not quite, but it is accurate enough." Lisa settled in with a smirk as her contractions started up again, her flush rapidly returning. The telltale twitches that had hidden her lie from her family were easily hidden by the assorted other contortions her face would soon be again pulling. "I think shortly after the experiment, which includes the incubation after all, has concluded will do nicely. I wouldn't want to rob them of their precious catharsis after all."

Alas, while Lisa's invention would provide solace to her, and make her celebrated across by all women around the world in the future it would also induce a terrible problem months later.

"It's not gay if-"

"Brother if you have to use 'it's not gay if;' then the thing in question is unquestionably homosexual in nature, street term: flaming."

"She's not wrong bruv, trust me; I'm qualified!"

"You're only half gay Luna! Look at this youtube video!
Only less than 10% of the futa is male so it's only 10% gay."

"That futa has a dick longer than her body Linc. That's like more than 50% gay."

"As fascinating as I find this argument the two of you have been having it for the past ten months in some capacity," Lisa dryly remarked. "I would suggest accepting that neither of you can reconcile your viewpoints and being done with it."

"Nah fuck that," Luna groused. "But I'm sick of debating how dicks aren't meant to be on girls-"

"BLARNEY LUNA! YOU DID THIS TO ME!"

"And I've been regrettin' every fuckin' second since." Luna put up her hand. "All right, all for saying that if it has a dick and you're a dude that's into it that makes you gay put your hands up!"

The Lab was currently filled with half a dozen people, sadly most of them were ineligible to vote as they were assorted Loud spawn. As it stood of the three there only Luna held her hand up.

"Aww c'mon Leese, you gotta take an objective view on this!" Luna whined, still holding her hand up.

"She is," Lincoln replied smugly. "It's obvious that if it has a vagina then there's nothing gay about it."

"Of there definitely is dear brother, but I would argue that such a being would be intersex and thus outside the standard social definition of homosexuality." Lisa calmly grabbed little Lacy before she tried escape her crib.

"So... I think that means that I win?" Luna asked.

"No, she said it wasn't homosexual; so I win, and even if I don't it's your own fault for fucking me with a toy until I broke- I used to be normal you know!" Lincoln folded his arms and glared.

The endless argument would have continued if not a sudden beep from Lisa's computer, a glance at which turned the scientist's lips pale.

"... Leese, why do you look like Lucy?" Luna questioned.

"That's an alert I put in place in case of a code pink." Lisa shuddered, and pressed a button. In seconds a series of metallic shutters came down over the house, and the premise was sealed.

"I haven't heard that before, how come we're in lockdown mode?" Lincoln moved over the pile of infants now slowly being roused from their rest.

"It is a protocol I put in place after Lily's... incident." Lisa moved to her computer and checked the cameras.

"By 'incident' do mean the one when she nearly came her brains out with her kids, cause that was just weird," Luna shuddered. "I thought that stuff was a godsend but seein' it in action was somethin' else."

"Indeed, I should have considered her own proclivities before administering the serum," Lisa shook her head. "But in my defence-"

"Nah sis, no defence. Happy juice makes baby coming out feel nice, raging pervert makes happy juice way more effective, baby coming out is bigger than any dick. Even I can see what happens next," Luna sighed. "But I thought she was kinda' brain dead, what's happened now with her?"

"Firstly Lily wasn't brain dead, merely recovering from the experience," Lisa corrected. "Street term: afterglow. Secondly: This code is something I put in place once I thought ahead and realised that with her persona her first priority upon recovering her senses would be-"

The steel door to the lab suddenly opened up, revealing Lily Loud in a hospital gown and with several broken straps adoring her limbs, a crazed look in her eyes to complete the getup.

"Dang it, forgot to change the security codes." Lisa muttered.

"Hiii big bro..." Lily sung. "You wouldn't believe the wonderful dream I had.."

Lincoln tried to hide behind Luna, who knew a lost cause when she one and valiantly preserved the lives of the innocent by shoving him at the crazy sister.

"Oh hi Lily, you know we were all worried about you?" Lincoln tried to smile, but felt himself wither before Lily's eyes. "You had the kids and screamed so loud-"

"I know... it was WONDERFUL!" She squeed. "Everyone needs to try it, but before then I need to try it aga-"

"Look Lily you already have three," Lincoln tried to be an adult for once. "I know Lisa's thing probably felt nice but-"

"No butts Linky" she giggled and suddenly pulled him towards her with steel fingers. "This is for me..."

"Computer close the door!" Lisa called out as Lincoln was pulled through, his look of betrayal being the last they would see of him for days.

"Is he gonna be all right?"

"I can probably fix the worst of the damage."

"Probably?"

"Feel free to be a hero dear sister."

"... Ya know what; he got 'imself into this mess so fuck 'im"

"I believe Lily has that covered already."

But of course, Lisa didn't entirely win without a cost, for it was revealed that her desired David had a fetish that was beyond even her capacity to detach from:

"Holding hands is a normal part of-"

"This is why Santiago left you."

"Ronnie still comes over!"

"To copulate brother, not to share your... perversions."

"That's just... look; we're having a rough patch at the moment because of the kids, but we still love each other!"

"When was the last time she said that?"

"..."

"..."

"... I'm going to check the kids, I think one needs changing."