Living in the Future

Summary: Knowing what the future holds can be a curse and a blessing. Reba deals with some extraordinary moments throughout her mostly-ordinary life. [Follow-up to my "Terry the Guardian Angel" series.]

A/N: I didn't plan to do this, really. In 2017 I realized we'd reached the year of Reba's trip to the future in the second story of my series. Cue present day, I'm editing my original novel (yup, it finally happened) and craving an additional writing exercise to keep the creative juices flowing. I couldn't stop thinking of this follow-up story. While my series could use major editing now that I'm older and wiser, for the most part I stand by it. In fact I'm hoping this new story will help me inject more of my old voice into my new work.

Aside from that – the timing couldn't be more perfect. The last chapter of the last story was posted in April 2009, so it's around the ten year anniversary! (God, I'm old.) Frankly I doubt any of my readers are still here, but if you are, this is for you. If you clicked on this not knowing anything about it...I feel for you, I really do. The four stories are still posted on my profile, so here are the titles in order for those feeling brave:

Living a Dream

Living a Nightmare (Read the last few chapters of this one if nothing else!)

Living a Life Not Mine

Living with Myself

Chapter One

April 2017

It was the dress.

Reba froze, her breathing shallow, eyes unblinking. This couldn't be real, could it? Ten years couldn't have gone by already.

But there it was. The dress she saw her older self wearing, ten years ago. Innocently hanging on a rack.

Maybe she'd remembered wrong. It couldn't be the dress.

But it all fit. Kyra was married and pregnant with her first child. Jake would graduate college this year, a reason to believe in miracles more than anything else she'd experienced. Cheyenne and Van had three kids. Brock and Barbra Jean had two. Everything fell into place, right on time.

Even the part about becoming a famous singer. Well, not as famous as it had looked to her past self, but still pretty well-known in her opinion...at least among country fans. She did have her own concert in a couple weeks. The show inspired this very shopping trip, when she realized she had nothing to wear.

Wait...so that meant...

Reba would be seeing her younger selves very, very soon. And Terry. Come to think of it, the concert hall she'd visited looked a lot like the one where she was scheduled to perform. Funny, past Reba thought it was a big stadium, but this venue only held a few hundred people. It must have been her mind playing tricks on her in her state of shock. Who could blame her?

"Earth to Mom? Hello?" Twenty-eight-year-old Kyra took a few steps towards her mother, not quite waddling but more hesitant than before the pregnancy. Her annoyance faded to concern when she noticed the panic in her mother's expression. "Hey, are you okay?"

Clearing her throat, Reba tried to shake off the moment but couldn't stop staring at the dress. It was emerald green, a slim number that stopped right above the knee. Exactly what she'd had in mind before the shopping trip. Had she subconsciously known it was time?

"Mom! Say something!"

Worried Kyra might call an ambulance, Reba forced herself to answer. "It's the dress," she whispered.

Kyra let out a sigh of relief but didn't relax just yet. "You're freaking out over fashion? Let me go find Cheyenne, she's better at this stuff."

"No, you don't understand." Reba managed to check if anyone would overhear her. Fortunately they had this section of the department store to themselves. "Kyra...this is the dress I saw. The one future me was wearing at the concert."

Her jaw dropped in surprise, but Kyra recovered quickly and also checked to make sure no one could hear them. "Oh. So, um, it's one of those moments. When you turn into Super Psychic Mom."

The irritating nickname snapped Reba out of her daze, mostly. "For the last time, I'm not psychic! It was all Terry!" She stopped to let out a calming breath. One panic attack at a time. "That doesn't matter right now. Kyra, this concert is the concert. What am I going to do?"

Kyra smirked. "Well, you already know that part, don't you? You were there."

"Oh my gosh, you're right," Reba realized. She finally broke away from the dress and paced in a small circle. "But that's even more terrifying, isn't it? If I say or do anything wrong it could change the past and my present. Good Lord, the slightest thing could mess up my whole life! All our lives! How the heck did the version of me I saw act so darn calm?"

Becoming concerned again, Kyra grabbed both of Reba's shoulders to stop the frantic pacing. "Mom, you've got to get a grip! At least until we're home. Then you can rant about time traveling as much as you want."

"Home, yes, let's go there..."

This was the condition thirty-three-year-old Cheyenne found her family in, sixteen-year-old Elizabeth trailing behind. "What the heck is going on here?" Cheyenne asked.

"Mom's having a meltdown. We need to leave, now."

Though Reba agreed, she resisted when Kyra grabbed her arm to leave the store. "Hold on. We have to buy the dress. It might be the most important dress I'll ever wear."

Back at home, Reba put the dress in her closet while she waited for her family to arrive. There were over a dozen of them so far with one on the way. Cheyenne and Van now had three children, just as she'd seen. Elizabeth inherited her parents' good looks, but valued her studies more than her social life. Elizabeth's ten-year-old brother, named Brock after his grandfather, now went by "Rocky" and corrected anyone who said otherwise. Their five-year-old sister, Alexis, was the youngest of the group and loved tagging along after the older kids.

Sixteen-year-old Henry and his little sister, nine-year-old Savannah, spent as much time as they could with their "nieces and nephew." All of the kids thought it odd that a teenager and a preteen were technically an uncle and aunt, not cousins. They usually referred to each other as "cousins" at school. If anything they teased Brock and Barbra Jean's son by calling him "Uncle Henry." Henry detested this name because it sounded like an old man – specifically, Dorothy's Uncle Henry in The Wizard of Oz.

Feeling nostalgic, Reba continued her trip down memory lane and took a photo album out of her closet. Most people kept all their pictures on their smartphones these days, but Reba printed up and saved her favorites every year. The earlier incident in the department store made her stop at one particular picture of Cheyenne and Van, ecstatic as they hugged their two older children tightly. The proud parents had just announced the imminent arrival of their third child.

That day brought back another memory for Reba – when she first realized she might never be completely normal again.

2011

"I'm pregnant!" Cheyenne exclaimed. Standing with Van in Reba's entryway, she rushed towards her siblings and parents in the living room. Beaming Van followed her for his share of the hugs and well-wishes. Elizabeth and Rocky joined in on the celebration, though they'd been told the news a few days earlier. Brock and Barbra Jean's family was also present. While preteen Henry congratulated his "cousins," four-year-old Savannah clapped even though she didn't understand the announcement.

Overwhelmed with happiness, Reba hugged Cheyenne and didn't want to let go. "Oh my Lord, this is amazing! I can't wait to meet your daughter!"

Everyone in the room paused. Reba's husband Adam put his hand on her shoulder. "Um, honey, they didn't say anything about having a girl."

Cheyenne nodded. "It's true. Van and I don't even know yet, it's too early to tell."

"But ya'll are having a girl, aren't you? I feel like...I remember..." Reba trailed off, her eyes widening as she realized where the information came from. Slowly she took a step away from the group. "I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking. Excuse me."

Then she ran for the kitchen. Making sure the divider was closed, she began pacing, wondering how she could possibly explain the inexplicable.

"Reba?"

She stopped at the sound of Adam's voice. Her husband stood with equally-concerned Brock and Barbra Jean. In the last few years the trio became an odd team, bonding over their shared love for Reba. "What was that about?" Brock asked. "And why are you so pale?"

"I'm usually pale!"

"Reba!"

Barbra Jean stepped towards her best friend. "You know you can tell us anything, right?"

Staring at his ex-wife with deep concern, Brock added. "Yeah, Reba, we've known each other most of our lives and I've never seen you like this. Whatever this is, it can't be worse than not telling us."

Adam nodded in agreement. "Honey, you're scaring me a little. You have to tell us."

After a moment of quiet, Reba shocked them all when tears began streaming down her face. "I'm a freak," she sobbed. "Cheyenne is having a girl. I'm sure of it because I've already seen her! You guys might not have heard, but...Terry showed me the future, back when this first started happening. I saw all of us in ten years." Reba paused to wipe away tears, struggling to compose herself. "Let me see, I wound up in 2017, so I guess that would make Cheyenne's third child about five. She's going to have brown hair, by the way."

Her family stared at her like she'd just announced she was an alien from another planet. Given the context, she completely understood. "It's not the first time this has happened," Reba continued, her voice steadier. "I knew Savannah would be a girl too, though I didn't make the connection until she was almost here. I guess I forgot after the commotion of being in Barbra Jean's body." She hesitated again, the memory flashing in her mind's eye. "Past me was way off about Savannah's age though. Let's chalk that one up to shock."

"Shock. Yeah, I get that." Adam moved closer to her, but when the first step was a little shaky, he sat on one of the stools at the counter island. "Reba...how...what...huh?"

"Right there with you, buddy." Brock also took a seat but chose a chair at the kitchen table. Both men wore expressions of total bewilderment.

While surprised, Barbra Jean took the news better than they did. "Wow," she whispered. "It's funny. We never talk about Terry and what happened to all of us, but it did happen. I always thought we would have to confront it eventually and now... Reba, we need to tell the kids. Elizabeth and Henry might remember some, but I want our entire family to hear the stories. I want them to grow up knowing angels are real."

Reba didn't have it in her heart to protest. Barbra Jean's argument made sense, and truth be told, she didn't want to keep secrets either. "We'll cross that bridge later, Barbra Jean. The problem is, what do I tell Cheyenne and Van?"

"I don't see that there is a problem," Brock answered. "So what if Cheyenne and Van know they're having a girl? They'll be thrilled."

Adam shook his head. "As crazy as this is, I'm beginning to see where Reba's coming from. Think of all the time travel shows and movies you've ever seen – knowing about the future changes it. What if Cheyenne and Van finding out this way leads them to do something different? What if Cheyenne isn't as careful because she believes the baby will be healthy..."

"Okay you can stop now!" Reba exclaimed, putting her hands over her ears. She gave her husband a sideways glance. "No more Quantam Leap reruns for you."

"You're the one panicking over a trip to the future!"

"Fair point." Reba took her hands off her ears and put an arm around Adam's shoulders. "Look, we can tell the kids everything that happened in the past, but Adam's right. The future needs to be off-limits. There's even a chance the future has already changed and Cheyenne's baby will be a boy. So let's just...make sure this doesn't leave the room. Until Cheyenne and Van find out for themselves."

Barbra Jean slowly nodded, taking it all in. "Okay, but what if something else comes up? Shouldn't you tell us what else you saw? Like, maybe another kid sitting next to Savannah..."

"Nice try," Reba retorted. "If something else comes up, I'll deal with it then. In the meantime I'm gonna try to live as normal a life as possible, whatever that is. And I believe 'normal' involves going inside to hug my pregnant daughter again."

Reba smiled at the picture before closing the album, thanking God it all worked out. She never would have forgiven herself if something happened to Cheyenne or Alexis. As she put the album away, Reba resumed worrying about her current predicament. Should she try to contact Terry? Maybe this stress was for nothing and the past couldn't be changed...

"Heard you had a weird day."

Relieved to hear Adam's voice from the doorway, Reba ran to hug her husband. "'Weird' doesn't begin to describe it," Reba said, her head on his shoulder and her arms around his waist. "Just when I think I'm living a normal life, something like this happens."

"Honey, hate to break it to you, but you've never been normal. One of the many, many reasons I fell in love with you."

Reba laughed. "So, how much did Kyra and Cheyenne tell you?"

"Everything, but I swear I still can't figure out this time travel stuff. Watching Doctor Who doesn't prepare you for the real thing." He pulled away from her slightly so he could try to make sense of it. "Now, if I'm getting this right, you're about to see your past selves. In essence, bringing everything full-circle." His eyes widened when something dawned on him. "Oh my God. Does this mean it's over? You won't know anything about the future after the concert, right?"

The idea made her calm for the first time since the department store. Adam was right. After the concert, it would be over. No more knowledge about the future tugging at her subconscious. She might not even see Terry again for the rest of her life. While she could live without being "psychic," she hated the possibility of saying a final good-bye to her ex-boyfriend guardian angel.

Then again, as much as she would miss Terry, he died almost fifteen years ago. Maybe they both needed to finally move on.

Adam frowned. "What? I can practically see the mental gears turning."

"Nothing, it's just...the end of an era." Reba linked her arm with his and turned them both towards the stairs. "I think I hear the door. Sounds like the gang's all here."

Reba stood behind the living room couch in front of her family. All five kids went to play softball in the backyard, none of them suspecting anything unusual. Sunday dinners had become a regular fixture for the Hart-Montgomery clan. When Reba expressed her desire for a weekly family dinner, Adam explained how his Italian relatives back east still got together for homemade pasta and meatballs every Sunday. Reba couldn't promise a pasta dish every week, but she suggested the concept and the family agreed wholeheartedly.

Over the years, Reba also redecorated the living room to accommodate everyone. While the basic color palate stayed the same, she bought a longer couch for the middle, and replaced the club chairs with loveseats. Now each adult could sit comfortably, though they often brought in chairs on the rare occasion the kids joined them.

This week, Barbra Jean offered to bring over chicken parmesan since Reba needed to go shopping for the concert. With dinner finishing in the oven, the adults gathered around to help Reba through the latest crisis. One that no one else in the world could have. All adults who knew about Terry were in this room, sans Jake and Lori Ann. Jake was away at college. Lori Ann had moved with her new husband about five years ago, but she stayed close enough that Reba could see her every few months.

Reba had also recognized Lori Ann's husband from her trip to the future. Another weird day added to a list of many.

They did have a small problem – Kyra married her bandmate Bryce two years ago, and he still didn't know the family secret. They solved the problem by convincing Bryce to pick up dessert from a bakery. Kyra made sure to choose a place that would be at least a half hour's drive one way.

"Okay, we have limited time here," Reba began. "This is a doozy, so I really wish we could have thought of a bakery further away. Like in Austin."

Kyra chuckled. She sat on the loveseat by the door, her feet elevated on the coffee table. "Sorry Mom, but I didn't marry an idiot. If we sent him on a wild goose chase, he'd have plenty of questions when he got back."

"Why don't we just tell him?" Barbra Jean asked.

"How would we convince him?" Brock replied. "It's not like years ago when bizarre things happened all the time. Reba hasn't even seen Terry...have you, Reba?" He and his wife sat on the side of the couch closest to Kyra, next to Cheyenne and Van. Adam took the other loveseat, which had space for Reba should she ever calm enough to sit down.

While Reba tried to think of the last time she saw Terry, Van shook his head in disbelief. "There's something that never stops being weird. 'Hey, Mrs. H, your guardian angel appear out of thin air lately?'" He gave Reba a sideways glance. "You sure you're not a saint? 'Cause this kind of thing usually only happens in The Bible."

Reba rolled her eyes at the ridiculous question, but Barbra Jean added to the theory. "You know, Van, I've thought the same over the years. There's got to be something different about Reba, because no one else I know has met their guardian angel..."

"Will ya'll quit it?" Their remarks got under Reba's skin. Deep down – deep down – she'd had similar thoughts before. But that was just absurd, right? Everything happened because of the coma. And because she had a dead ex-boyfriend with a wicked sense of humor. "Once again, for the thousandth time, it was all from the coma and Terry messing with my head. To answer your question, Brock, I haven't seen him in two years. Not since...um..."

She paused, realizing Cheyenne and Van didn't know this story. For good reason.

2015

How could she lose Rocky? She raised three children of her own and now helped raise three grandchildren. How could she do something so stupid, so...Barbra Jean-like? She still didn't fully trust Barbra Jean after finding out she lost Elizabeth. Now Reba wouldn't have a leg to stand on.

Reba should have admitted that taking all five kids to the aquarium by herself would be too much. But fourteen-year-olds Elizabeth and Henry insisted they could help with Rocky, Savannah and Alexis. Well, Elizabeth insisted. Henry didn't care about seeing fish and wanted to play video games at home. Still, Elizabeth forced him to help them out.

So, with Alexis still in her stroller, they all went to the aquarium for the day. It happened that Cheyenne and Van couldn't leave since they were getting some repairs done on their roof. Both parents also had work to catch up on. Reba almost canceled the trip when Barbra Jean was called into the studio, and Brock wound up taking care of their own house maintenance issues. One by one every adult backed out until by some twist of fate, Reba was the only parent left.

In Reba's opinion, this was everyone else's fault as much as hers. They should have told the kids the trip was off, instead of leaving Reba to be the fall guy. She could do many things but she couldn't force five kids to stay home on a Saturday.

She had to be calm. She couldn't panic in front of the remaining kids. As it was, Elizabeth had started crying silent tears, feeling like it was all her fault. Reba would have to console her later, but for the moment, she instructed the teens to watch Savannah and Alexis while she alerted security. Soon enough all security detail and even some parents joined in the search for the missing eight-year-old.

After a half hour and still no Rocky, Reba finally broke down in an empty exhibit, allowing a brief moment for tears before resuming the search. She found herself praying to God, Terry and whoever else was listening to help her find her grandson.

Her prayers were answered. Terry appeared before her, for the first time in at least two or three years. "Hey, Reba."

"Thank God!" Reba hugged Terry so tightly she knocked him off balance. Embarrassed, she stepped back and tried to make a joke despite her tear-stained face. "See, this is what guardian angels are for. Not time travel or switching bodies or making clones."

Terry grinned at her. "You aren't real good at the 'asking for help' thing, are you?"

"No, not at all." Reba let out a deep, steadying breath. "Terry, I really screwed up. You gotta tell me – please, where's my grandson? Is Rocky okay?"

Her honest, humble answer won Terry over. "I'm supposed to be more vague about these things, but when have I ever followed the rules? He's fine, Reba. Rocky lost track of ya'll when he tried to find the shark exhibit on his own. He figured you were leaving soon so he went out to the car. Since you locked it, he's sitting on the grass by the curb."

"What? He knows better than that! We taught all the kids to go up to someone in charge if they're ever lost in public." Making a mental note to go over the rules again, Reba almost ran to the car without saying good-bye to Terry. She stopped short at the door and turned around. "Thank you. I can't say that enough. Will I see you again?"

Terry nodded. "You will. If you think about it, you'll probably remember when that will be."

The angel disappeared before she could ask for an explanation. Mystified, Reba ran off to gather up the kids and track down her grandson.

Now Reba understood. Terry had been talking about this moment, and the upcoming concert. "Um, I've just seen him on occasion," Reba finished, wondering why the kids never ratted her out. She supposed the teens felt partly responsible and kept the younger kids quiet."Now, can we please focus on the problem at hand?"

"I still don't see what the issue is," Kyra argued. "You know exactly what's going to happen, right? Just do that."

Reba sighed. "We've been over this. I can't guarantee I'll remember everything word for word. I've been racking my brain but Lord, this was ten years ago. I think past me needed an aspirin and I had it ready for her...me..." She trailed off and tried again. "Past me was kind of distracted by my future husband sitting in the audience. When I only just met him!"

"Sorry," Adam said, but he couldn't help smiling at the idea of distracting her. "What was I doing?"

Resting her hand on the table behind the couch, Reba's brow creased as the question brought back another memory. "You...you looked at me," she realized. "It felt like our eyes locked. Like you knew I'd be there. Turns out, you do."

"Whoa," Cheyenne whispered in amazement.

Barbra Jean tilted her head in thought. "Too bad you didn't have a phone back then to record everything. Maybe you can have Terry take you back there for like, an instant replay." She paused. "I guess he'd take you forward, not back. Time travel is confusing."

"Preaching to the choir," Adam joked, with Kyra expressing her agreement.

While her instinct was to dismiss Barbra Jean's idea, as usual, Reba considered it. Could Terry show her the exact same moment again? Watching three versions of herself interact might make her head spin, and on another level, break some laws of physics. But was it much worse than what she'd already seen? Well, she wanted to talk to Terry before the concert, so she'd take any reason to contact him. "That may not be as ridiculous as it sounds," Reba said. "At the very least, I do need to talk to Terry."

Struggling to follow the conversation, Brock managed to ask, "Can you still do that? I know he used to show up all the time before, but now..."

"I'm not sure. Let me try." Years ago Reba demanded Terry appear by shouting his name, but after the aquarium incident, she decided to use a different prayed. While her family watched, she placed her palms on the table behind the couch for balance and closed her eyes.

Terry, I need to talk to you. Please. I'm sure you know what's going on. You can't expect me to face this alone, not when you've been so present in my life. Please guide me through this. I don't want to mess it up. There's too much on the line to take risks. I might be wrong, and nothing I do can change the past, but tell me that so I can make it through the concert without a panic attack.

Just...be my guardian angel and help me. Please.

"Time flies, huh?"

Reba opened her eyes at the sound of Terry's voice. She found him standing to her right, casually resting a hand on the table. Those on the couch jumped, Adam's jaw dropped...and Kyra waved. "I'd say so!" she greeted brightly, pointing to her pregnant stomach. "Question, am I allowed to time travel in this condition?"

Terry laughed and waved back. "I doubt it will be an issue. Congratulations, Kyra."

"Thanks! I'd love to introduce you to my husband, but he's..."

"H-here."

Everyone turned towards the entryway. Bryce Walter stood with wide, unblinking eyes, taking in the scene before him. He must have walked in at exactly the wrong moment. "I-I..." he stuttered, then tried again. "I-I forgot my wallet."

Reba sighed and glanced at Terry. "Admit it, you've missed us."