Cacophony: a harsh, discordant mixture of sounds

G1ntsuk1: Thank you. Although I think this chapter may have been pushing it on how slow I was. Sorry for the delay.

Guest (January 3rd): I LIVE INDEED! *strikes a pose* And actually, that was indeed my plan. Foiled again...

SparrowOfTheBlock: That Easter egg was indeed intentional. Congratulations!

Dragondacer81: *blushes profusely and dances like Chopper*

Cisk Kazzarch: Thanks. I'm glad to be back, what little I am.

Raisuke the Lightning Herald: It's good to be back! Thanks! But I'm no queen...

Fantasylovermagi: Thanks! But I'm no queen...

Darkmaster10000000: Patient and I are still together at the moment, yes. Thank you.

Guest (January 7th): Thank you very much. *dances*

Noblelady2: Thank you!

Gamelover41592: Thanks! It's good to be back. Slow, but back. And I'll work on getting a little faster so the waits aren't quite so long. (Seven months, tabarnak...)

Kippysaurus: You're right, I labelled Law as English mostly for the transportation jokes. So much fun... I'll keep your ideas in mind for Doffy- they're interesting. Thanks! As for how I motivate myself... *shrugs* I keep imagining scenes I would really like to write, then writing the in-between stuff until I get there. Things like Ace burning Jones, or the great Blackbeard fiasco, or the currently upcoming War of 1812 moment. Sorry if that's not very helpful...

Questions: I have only taken down and reposted this story once, and it was because my parents forced me to take it down and I had to wait a few months to put it back up so they didn't notice.

Guest (January 17th): You're welcome.

Guest (January 20th): Sorry about that. The reason I make the omakes separate chapters is because sometimes I need a short little thing to boost my morale- sometimes I tank in the middle of working on a chapter and need to get back on track. And then I want to post them right away instead of waiting...

Diggin: I'm... not exactly doing better yet, but I'm trying. Thank you.

AkioTheHero: Thank you- I'm glad to be back. And I'll try not to make you sad- at least due to a lack of updates.

Hunting4Harts: Thank you. Although writing often helps me work through things, so I might be better off if I can actually get myself doing it more...

Call Brig On Over: Thanks. It's good to be back.

DraconicDuelist: Thank you very much. The beginning of my story... Jones' flashbacks are all based on things that have actually happened to me, just with some of the names changed. As for Blue's story "Kebana t'Stihau-ve," the English title (which Blue probably should have used, but she was trying to make herself feel more intellectual and avoid giving away the ending) was originally "The Pornoglyph." The Drangor words essentially mean "The Stone of Intercourse." And the show my commentary on statistics was from was called Corner Gas.

Gerbilfriend: Thank you very much.

T0PH4T: Thank you for giving me a chance. I hope I continue to provide entertainment.

I-Kan-Spel: Wow. You must know my story better than I do if you noticed that line going missing when I reposted. Thank you- it's fixed now.

The Nefarious Nerd: Ouch. My best wishes to your grandmother, and my apologies if this comes late.

HamClad: Thank you very much. *bows deeply* I hope I continue to live up to those expectations.

Draco Oblivion: Thank you. I love experimenting with Luffy's Voice of All Things- it can be so useful and fun.

HarunoWolf17: *blushes heavily* That quote does indeed make sense, yes. Thank you... Although surely saying I'm one of the greatest is an exaggeration... *dances like Chopper* The question of romance is tricky in TRL, to be honest. Before I started dating Patient, the plan was to have the main relationship be Robin X Jones X Ace, but I'm no longer certain I'm comfortable writing that outcome... As for the sword thing, yes, Jones could easily learn to use a sword- she actually already knows a couple of basics, since she's me. But no, I don't think she'll be carrying Funkfreed. I try to avoid overlapping with This Bites! too much (except during crossovers).

Guest (April 10th): It doesn't have more reviews because I was forced to take it down and repost it, so I lost all the old ones. But I'll work hard to get more! *determined face*

TheOwlOfTheNight: Thank you. And I don't intend to give up. I'll keep going as long as I can.

GreenLilly: Never fear, my Hats won't be meeting the team. One universe worth of chaos is enough for me for now. And some of those pairings have interesting potential, if I felt like practicing writing romance... Thanks.

Dantezess: Sorry you didn't like Ace's introduction. And yes, Jones' Fruit is all kinds of broken. It's fun to play with.

Guest (May 4th): Here's an update, although I doubt this is what you meant by soon. Sorry!

Meian Kurayami: *dances like Chopper* Thank you very much!

Sum9: Hard the work has been... I did hit a bit of a dry spell, and some more depression too, but I think they're past for now. Thank you!

Miep42: Thank you very much! T-T It's good to be back.

Celesse201: Here's more! Although Jones doesn't play much part in this chapter, being unconscious and all.

NocturnalCreature998: Aye, you read right. Perkunas. Jones follows an old Baltic pantheon- not quite Lithuanian, but close enough that there's some overlap. I do know a bit about some Lithuanian gods and traditions- mythology in general interests me greatly, even regarding paths I don't follow.

Naparis9000: Hmmm... Interesting idea, but I already have plans for what to do with Merry. Thanks anyway.

Amillefleur: Thank you for your enthusiasm! Your help would be appreciated when I get to that point, if you're still interested, but I've still got a long ways to go.

Azareel: Thank you very much.

Schazmen: Thank you very much. And I hope I didn't turn you off by making Enel act the way he does at the end of this one...

MnRebel27: Thank you very much! I probably should switch that chapter, I guess... But at the same time, it's in the order they were written and published right now, and it feels weird to change it from that...

Fwap! Thud!

The sound of his tail hitting his opponent's skull was music to Drifter's ears. The otter twisted in the air, trying hard not to fall. Below him, Geier shot past the rider's flaming lance, so close one of her feathers caught fire. Such a nasty smell… Luckily, she was able to put it out quickly, rolling through a thick patch of cloud.

{{Black Cat's Claws!}}

Drifter used his target's head like a dancer's pole, swinging around to slash at the man's face with his clam blades. Many of the strikes did little damage, blocked first by a leather helmet and then by gloves as the bird rider brought a hand up. A few lucky blows caught around his forehead and temples, though, and head wounds bleed. Drifter dropped to the bird's back and ducked to avoid flailing hands as the rider, blinded by his own blood, tried to throw the otter officer off.

Of course, the feathery platform didn't exactly stay level. Drifter had to hang on tight as the bird bucked sharply in the air, Geier coming up from beneath to gouge the larger avian repeatedly with her beak.

{{Take this, bastard! Fury Attack!}} A particularly nasty strike ripped some feathers from the giant raptor's chest and left it bleeding, although Geier's beak was too short to get in and damage anything important. {{How dare you attack our friends! Our ship!}}

{{Shura asked me to!}} the massive bird retorted, snapping at Geier. He couldn't quite twist his head enough to reach her properly, though. {{And whatever my friend asks is my pleasure to do! After all, those friends of yours were just worthless wounded; they won't last much longer whether we kill them or not!}}

{{Barbarian!}} Geier let out a vicious hiss, jabbing the larger bird with her beak once more before launching herself away.

The bird's rider- who must be this Shura person- reoriented himself in a matter of seconds. Drawing back in an odd position, the man lunged at Drifter with his spear. Which was a very stupid move, in the otter's opinion. If the human missed him, he ran a high chance of hitting his own mount.

"Stupid rodent! You'll never beat me- you can't use Mantra! And unlike that ghost, I can actually hit you! Now die!"

Drifter waited until the last possible second, then slipped away from the lance just as it would have hit him. The result was a spike of burning steel plunging into the giant bird's shoulder blades, setting it bucking and screeching.

{{Not a rodent!}} Drifter snarled, although he knew his opponent couldn't understand him. How he wished he could speak English. And… What was that about a ghost? Eh, he'd find out later. Must've been something Ghin and Toma did to defend the Going Merry; maybe something Usopp and the hopeless hunters had built? {{Open the Umbrella!}}

A heavy tail strike to the chest knocked the bird rider backwards, tearing him free of his harness. Whatever this Mantra thing was, it didn't seem to help him dodge. At least, not when the fighting platform was the back of his bird. The man kept a firm hold on his lance as he tumbled ass over teakettle through the air. At the last moment, a gloved hand closed over one of the straps of the bird's riding harness, saving the rider from falling.

Huh. Those wings were just for looks, then.

{{Incoming!}} Geier took advantage of the distraction to dart in at the larger bird again, this time aiming for his wing. The great raptor let out a wordless hiss and snapped at the vulture, buffeting her away with powerful wingbeats. He was just a bit too slow, however; as Geier tumbled away, so did a hefty chunk of the larger bird's feathers. Gleaming eyes glowed with anger.

{{You're a real pain in my ass, Blue Sea Feather Rat!}}

{{Not yet,}} Geier chirped back, {{But I'm going to be.}}

{{HSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I'll get you, or my name isn't Fuza!}} The larger raptor swiped at Geier with his talons, missing as she rolled out of the way. Drifter's partner raised one feathery eyebrow.

{{So… What's your name, then?}}

"Heat Javelin!" The heat of that flaming lance approaching let Drifter know that his own opponent had climbed back up to secure footing. Rolling out of the way once more, the otter jumped and launched himself at Shura's face just as Fuza was rearing back his head.

{{Sunbird!}}

{{Four-Leafed Clover!}}

Flames shot forth from Fuza's mouth- which really wasn't fair, because Drifter had never seen Ruatha do that and the scale-snapper was a dragon. The fire caught the edges of Geier's wings, filling the air with the smell of burnt feathers. Drifter very nearly abandoned his own attack mid-leap, a strong urge to check on his partner overtaking him. But she was just as experienced as he was, already rolling into a patch of cloud to put out the fire. She would be fine.

Four arcing slices… Shura blocked two of them, but with one hand holding his lance, he couldn't defend properly. At least not without stabbing himself in the face; being small had certain advantages when it came to fighting up close and personal. As soon as his attack was done, Drifter sheathed his clam blades in mid-air. His opponent tried to punch him and knock him out of the way; the otter responded to this by grabbing Shura's fist and using it as leverage to flip himself over, bringing his tail down hard on the man's head.

{{Bell Toll!}}

Shura was momentarily dazed by the blow, his eyes spinning. This gave Drifter a change to get his bearings, dropping to land on Fuza's back. It also gave Geier a chance to dart in and try to take the man's lance. Unfortunately, Fuza foiled her attempt; the giant raptor reared back in the air and buffeted Geier with his enormous wings. Desperately trying to avoid being blown away, the vulture folded her own wings and latched beak and talon onto the larger bird's riding harness.

This had the unfortunate side-effect of getting her badly tangled in said riding harness when Fuza dove and rolled to try and grab her. If Drifter hadn't been so busy holding onto the larger bird for dear life, he would've facepalmed.

"Heat Javelin Flurry!"

Shura had managed to maintain his position through the bucking and rolling despite being stunned. Probably by tangling his legs with the riding harness. He used this position to rain strikes down at Drifter's head, apparently headless of the fact that he could potentially stab Fuza. One of the strikes clipped Drifter's ear; the others missed by millimeters as he bounded towards his opponent across the great bird's feathery back.

Lances really weren't made for fighting in such close quarters.

Down below, Geier was struggling to free herself from the entangling riding straps. Her movement caused Fuza to roll and twist. Bending his head down, the larger bird tried to snap Drifter's partner in half with his mighty beak, but he couldn't quite reach.

. . .

This guy wasn't so dangerous as he was fucking annoying. He was a bomber pilot, used to fighting ground targets that couldn't move fast or attack on his level. Someone like that should know better than to engage a more maneuverable airborne opponent without backup.

{{Fuckit… I don't have time for you. I'm supposed to be looking for my friends, Asshole.}} Drawing his clam blades, Drifter darted in as his opponent pulled back to prepare a strike. He hadn't used this technique in a long time- no way was he going to let someone like Crocodile see what he could really do when the man had no respect for him. But for Luffy… Luffy and the rest of the Straw Hats deserved his best.

{{One for Sorrow, Two for Joy, Three for a Girl, Four for a Boy!}}

A quick headbutt, skull against skull. Drifter's head smarted at that, but it wasn't nearly as bad as the time he'd done this to a bear. That strike was followed with two long slices across the chest that ripped through Shura's armour. Last, a powerful tail met the man's groin as Drifter landed. The otter also cut Fuza's riding straps at the same time, causing Shura to lose his tenuous footing on the bird's back.

Shura scrabbled for the ends of the riding straps with his free hand. A fat lot of good it did him, given that they were falling away, sliced to ribbons. When he realized this, the bird rider actually threw his lance overboard in order to try and climb back on his partner's back. Geier, now free from where she'd been entangled, wasted no time in swooping to grab the weapon.

Maybe if he'd been alone, Shura would've managed to wrap his arms around Fuza's neck and hang on long enough for the bird to land. Maybe. Drifter wasn't interested in giving him that chance, though. This man had attacked his injured, defenseless crewmates. Had they been back on Newfin Island, Drifter could've brought him in on so many charges for that. As it was… As it was, when this asshole was one of the ones making and enforcing the laws, there was really only one thing to do.

Drifter leapt up onto Geier's back as she swooped back around, motioning to Shura with his paw. If birds were capable of grinning maliciously, Geier would have. Since she couldn't, what she did do was dive down and wedge the tip of the still-warm Heat Javelin between Shura's chest and Fuza's back, prying the not-quite-human rider off of his mount like she was opening an oyster shell. As she did so, her talons pressed some nigh-invisible button on the haft, sending flames shooting up from chinks in the metal. As his partner used her momentum to throw Shura back, Drifter took care to slap the man in the face with one of his signs.

You're fired.

He was rewarded with a somewhat high-pitched yelp as Shura tumbled away from Fuza. Normally, Drifter wasn't one to find the idea of someone falling several stories to the ground funny, but this… It was almost impossible not to laugh at that very un-manly scream.

"AaaaAAAAAuuugh!"

{{SHIT! SHURA!}} Singed and panicking, Fuza dove off to the side in pursuit of his falling rider. For a moment, Drifter considered going after him. But… The giant bird didn't look at all dangerous now, singed badly and with large patches of feathers missing. Targeting him now would be just sad. And they had Shura's weapon now…

Sighing, Drifter settled into his usual position on Geier's back. {{That was a waste of time…}}

Geier snorted, one eye focused on the Heat Javelin as she soared through the air. {{Speak for yourself. I just got me a new toy.}} She shot him a reproachful look. {{Plus, we avenged whatever they did at the Going Merry, which I doubt Ghin and Toma could do themselves right now.}}

{{Right, right.}} Drifter frowned. What exactly had the bird and his maniac done to their friends? The otter patted his partner's left wing. {{If Jones and Usopp are still alive, I'm sure they can look after themselves a while longer. We should go find Ghin and Toma, check on them. If those assholes did anything…}}

{{I don't think Sanji will appreciate you using a coffee cannister for that purpose,}} Geier told him as she wheeled away in the direction Shura and Fuza had come from. Drifter snorted.

{{If those two did anything to our friends, I won't need a coffee cannister. One of Sanji's old cigarette boxes will be more than big enough.}}

-V-

"GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Wyper strained against the chains binding him, but they'd somehow become stuck fast. That… That didn't make sense. How could chains lock themselves? It was hard enough to believe that so many of them had wrapped around him when the ball exploded, let alone that they could pin him to a tree with such force. He couldn't even raise his arm to fire his Burn Bazooka.

Dozens of cloud balls floated through the air nearby. Wyper tried to kick one in frustration, only to be reminded that his legs were bound as tight as the rest of him. How in blazes was he going to get out of this?!

One of the nearby cloud balls began to giggle. It slowly unfolded, revealing red hair, fluffy wings, and stocky limbs. Wyper growled.

"Potoni tlacatecolotl!"

"Now, now, now, that's just rude," Satori chided with a pout. The false priest actually looked… disappointed? "I was so hoping to catch one of those Blue Sea rats, too… But all I got was a rude little fly."

Bouncing closer, Satori actually dared to pat Wyper on the head. The war leader felt himself go red with rage; he tried to bite the false priest's hand, that being the only course of action truly available to him at the moment. Satori clicked his tongue and shook his head.

"Don't be rude, little fly. I can still spare a few minutes to play with you, while you're in my web." Satori cast around at his numerous floating balls, humming. "Let's see… What shall I do to you first? Shall I set you on fire? Wash out that filthy mouth of yours? Have you pecked to death by enraged turkeys?"

"I'M NO ONE'S PLAYTHING!" Wyper snarled, straining against his bonds. The chains shifted ever so slightly. Ah. So they weren't properly locked after all. "UNTIE ME AND FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN!"

Satori shook his head, reeling one of his floating balls in close and testing its… weight? Density? Something like that. "No, no, no, I'm afraid that just won't do. I'm something more than a man, you see; I'm one of Enel's chosen. While you are… less."

Then the false priest's face lit up. "Ah, yes! This one will work nicely!"

He lobbed the cloud ball he was holding towards Wyper. It detonated a bit prematurely, still several centimeters from his face; needles flew out in every direction, more than a hundred of them. And yet somehow only one struck its intended target, piercing through the lobe of Wyper's left ear. Satori pouted.

"Well, that was no fun. Let's find another one…"

"I… am not… your toy!" Wyper grunted between breaths as he strained harder against the chains binding him. "And this… is not… your land!"

The chains were shifting now, some more than others. They loosened fastest around his chest and shoulders, with the one at his neck barely moving at all. Wyper felt the heavy links digging into his windpipe, pinching at his skin. They made breathing difficult. But if he could just get his arm free to use his Burn Bazooka…

"No… No… Not that one either…" Satori, meanwhile, was continuing to examine and flip through his balls. Which made no sense- Wyper couldn't see how the false priest could possibly know what was in each one. They all looked exactly the same. It was probably just a power play to try and make him nervous. Well, he was too angry to be nervous.

Slick, sticky streams began to thread their way down Wyper's neck and chest from where the chains were digging into his skin. For a moment, he couldn't breathe at all. Black patches bloomed on the edges of his vision. Then all at once, the chains holding him snapped.

SKRRRRR-KUNG!

Gasping, Wyper rolled free. He fumbled with his Burn Bazooka as he came up in a kneeling position, not truly bothering to aim. A concerted effort at aiming would only make it more likely that Satori could use Mantra to dodge- that, and when your weapon is capable of striking a fairly large area, aiming is largely unnecessary.

FWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!

A cone of flame roared out of the barrel of the weapon, scorching everything within thirty meters in front of Wyper. This included about two dozen trees, a vast quantity of undergrowth, eighteen cloud balls, and one false priest. The cloud balls exploded in showers of multicoloured sparks; their wielder yelped and rolled across the ground to extinguish the flames on his clothing and hair.

"Owie, owie, owie!" Dancing around as he patted out the last few flames on his backside, Satori shot Wyper a venomous glare. "Alright, now I'm angry. Bikkuritama Tsuki!"

The false priest threw one of his cloud balls directly at Wyper's face, kicking a few others so that they bounced off of each other like a demented game of ullamaliztli. The first exploded as Wyper ducked out of the way, releasing a smell like rotten peppers. It made his eyes water. Two other balls got within striking distance; one of these burst into flames as it brushed by Wyper's arm, while the other sent more chains flying everywhere.

Thankfully, this time they didn't bind him to a tree. Leaping over the flying chains, Wyper found himself face to face with a suddenly rather pale Satori. He squeezed the trigger, firing his Burn Bazooka at point-blank range… Only to have a disappointingly small tongue of flame lick out with all the ferocity of a nervous kitten. This gave Satori ample time to scamper away.

"Dammit! What's wrong?" Wyper quickly turned his weapon over in his hands. Why would…? Oh. There were needles jammed into the regulator. He must've used up his entire charge in that initial blast. Shit.

"HAH!" Satori bounced out of reach before Wyper could grab him to deal with him hand-to-hand. The false priest swung up into a tree as the war leader tossed his broken Burn Bazooka aside. "As if a half-wit tribal like you could ever defeat me! Just accept your fate and die quietly. Tama Dragon!"

Several of the nearby cloud balls formed together into a chain, as if pulled by invisible strings. Leaping onto the construction's back, Satori applied the finishing touch in the form of a grinning serpent's head sculpted from the same type of cloud. The entire construct dove at Wyper with frightening speed, its creator laughing madly on its back. Rolling out of the way, the Shandian war leader ducked behind a tree…

Only to find that the cloudy dragon was still chasing him. One of the balls that made up its body clipped a branch as it soared around the tree, causing the whole thing to explode in Wyper's face. Satori was thrown off with a surprised grunt, although he seemed to be largely unharmed.

The same couldn't be said for Wyper. The blast knocked him off his feet, covering him with something sticky and leaving his face and chest red and raw. White spots danced across his vision from the blinding light. All around him, weapons and shards of shrapnel that had been contained in one of the cloud balls rained down on the forest floor. One of them, a decorated hunting spear, bit deeply into Wyper's shoulder.

"GRRRRSHT!"

Grabbing the haft of the spear, Wyper yanked it out of his shoulder as he rose to his feet. That action set another thin stream of blood flowing, this one down his arm, but he didn't particularly care. Channelling all of his rage into s single, focused glare, Wyper slowly advanced on Satori. He stepped carefully to avoid slicing his feet open on any of the fallen weapons. In a matter of moments he was behind the false priest, although Satori was too busy beating out the fires that had caught on his jumpsuit to pay Wyper much attention.

Fwump! Tong-Smack!

Kicking up a shield he found among the scattered weapons, Wyper caught it and settled it on his arm. That sound finally got Satori's attention; the false priest turned around to look at Wyper with dull, bored eyes.

"Why won't you just die already?"

"I was born during the tonalli of the ocelotl," Wyper growled. "And while I'm not sure what an ocelotl is, I know those born to it cannot be killed while they fight for their people."

"A silly superstition," Satori scoffed, gathering more of his cloud balls to himself. "Your backwoods traditions don't scare me, and they won't allow you to defeat my Mantra."

The false priest flung a series of cloud balls at Wyper in quick succession, using them as cover to back away. Each one exploded against the war leader's new shield as he crouched behind it, leaving him mostly unharmed. As he waited for the barrage to subside, Wyper focused on the only image he'd ever seen of an ocelotl. An elegant creature with giant claws and a spotted pelt… It was a predator built for speed. And while he didn't believe in the old superstitions the way some of his kinsmen did, he had no qualms with learning from jungle animals if it made you a better warrior.

"Will your Mantra still protect you if you're too slow to avoid me?"

"What?!"

"Hunter's Dance!"

Coiling like a spring, Wyper launched himself forwards as fast as he could. Satori managed to get partially out of the way, but the false priest wasn't quite fast enough. Wyper's shield caught Satori's leg against the side of a tree; the wooden rim dug into flesh to produce a yelp of pained surprise. From there, Wyper gave a mighty twist and heave, tossing his opponent back over his head.

There was a loud snap of bone as Satori's leg broke.

A quick spin and lunge allowed Wyper to strike Satori again as he came down, although the false priest avoided the worst of the damage by bouncing himself off one of his cloud spheres. Still, Wyper's spear left an obviously bleeding hole in the Birkan's wing.

"You- I- But I knew what you were- How?"

"Because if I am ocelotl, you are pochtecatl." Wyper wasn't entirely sure what the round, tusked creature the ocelotl had been hunting in the old engraving was, but Satori certainly resembled one. "You're very dangerous, yes, but you cannot outrun one who was made to hunt."

Satori grimaced, hauling himself to his feet despite his broken leg. Wyper nodded at that, a tiny spark of respect flickering in the corner of his mind. At least the false priest was able to face his fate as a man. There would be no more bouncing around. Although that didn't prevent Satori from making one last effort to defend himself.

"Tama Dragon! Bikkuritama Tsuki!"

This time, Satori didn't try to ride the dragon that he threw at Wyper. This apparently made it harder for him to steer, though- that, or his broken leg was throwing off his balance and aim. The dragon ploughed head-first into a tree, its body coiling around the wood before exploding in a shower of sparks and sharp rocks. When the smoke cleared, the tree was gone. A sphere that released a cloud of stinking gas hit Wyper in the face, setting his eyes watering, while another cloud exploded like an overcharged Impact Dial and tore a hole in another tree. Two more cloud spheres exploded upon striking each other, scattering candies and bars of soap across the battlefield.

Despite his watering eyes and stinging nose, Wyper advanced quickly on his target. He had more important things to deal with than a self-important false priest. A springing leap carried him into his target shield-first. This time, already hampered by a broken leg, Satori wasn't fast enough to get out of the way at all. Wyper slammed the false priest into a tree. There was a loud crack as Satori's head bounced off wood.

Pulling back his shield, Wyper let Satori slump to the ground. Just in case, the war leader gave his opponent a swift kick to the face. No response. Good.

Wyper strode back over to where he'd discarded his broken Burn Bazooka and retrieved the weapon, slinging it in its usual place across his back. He would fix it later, when he had more time; at worst, he could throw it at Enel and hope it acted as some sort of distraction. Until then… His shield and spear were okay, although he'd prefer to have a Reject Dial.

Unless… Satori had to have used Dials to make his exploding cloud balls. Maybe he had a Reject Dial. It was a long shot, but still…

Wyper bent down to rifle through Satori's jumpsuit pockets. There were a number of Dials, some of them types Wyper hadn't actually seen before. Those must be the ones that made the cloud spheres; they might come in handy, if he could figure out how to use them. Flame Dials, Axe Dials, Flavour Dials… The false priest had a rather nice pair of Impact Dial gloves that Wyper confiscated. No Reject Dials, though. Dammit.

Muttering curses under his breath, Wyper stalked off through the jungle. The Impact Dials would have to do when he found Enel. They weren't nearly as good, but maybe with them and his new spear… And if he could find the girl… She could act as a Reject Dial for him. Where the Hell had she ended up?

-V-

The strange man surged forward, his spikey dreadlocks trailing behind him. Johnny and Yosaku barely had time to swing their swords; there was certainly no time to flee. Blue-white sparks crackled along the blades as they swung.

"Electroblade!"

Most people, especially people who could move as fast as this stranger, would've at least tried to get out of the way. Not so here. The winged man charged right into their attacks. Electrified swords tore through purple fabric, then through flesh. But whatever pain the cuts caused didn't seem to bother this man at all.

"Jet Punch!"

Something on the winged man's elbows made a puffing noise; tiny jets of air tore holes in the sleeves of his violently violet suit. This resulted in Johnny and Yosaku each taking a heavy punch in the chest, too fast for them to get their swords around to block. The former bounty hunters skidded backwards a couple of metres, their boots digging furrows in the soft, cloudy soil. Only the fact that they were back to back, supporting each other, kept them from falling over.

Johnny's mouth tasted of copper. He spat out a few drops of blood, feeling the inside of his cheek swell where he must've bitten it. "Hey, Bro, this guy punches almost as hard as Big Bro Luffy."

Yosaku grinned. "Yep."

That was… disturbing. "I think you've been spending too much time with Big Bro Zoro and Big Sis Jones if you think that's something to be happy about. How do we defend against something like that?"

Yosaku's slightly disturbing grin broadened. "The same way they would. The best defense is a good offense, right?"

Johnny's heart plummeted to his shoes. Why? Why did they have to be the ones to do this? They weren't even originally here, according to Jones. Who was supposed to fight this guy? Couldn't they do it instead?

"Come on, Bro! The sooner we do this, the sooner we can get back to searching for the others!" Yosaku slid into a low fighting stance. Johnny followed a beat behind, sighing. Then both hunters sprang at their opponent, swords flying.

"ELECTROBLADE STORM!"

Every slash struck home. The winged man they were fighting seemed to have completely forgotten that dodging was a thing that existed. Actually, judging by the greyish tint to his face, he wasn't always remembering to breathe either. Weird. Johnny and Yosaku drove their opponent back towards a huge tree in an effort to trap him; for his part, he continued punching them as they pushed and slashed and zapped. Whatever it was on his elbows that made little puffing noises also sped up his punches and made them hurt a lot.

He sure was dedicated to the idea of killing them, Johnny had to give him that.

It was only when his back struck the tree- which was now decorated with a red smear- that the winged man seemed to realize that however fast his punches were, he just couldn't get enough of them through the coordinated storm of swords to gain the advantage. He may have been taller, but Johnny and Yosaku's weapons were enough to give them reach, and the electricity in their blades caused spasms that made their opponent's attacks fly wild.

"Swamp Cloud Burger!"

The winged man clicked a Dial that he appeared to be using as a cuff link. Dense, sticky cloud flew out, coalescing into something that looked like a blob of grey tar. He flung this mass forwards; it expanded as it flew. Johnny and Yosaku leapt sideways and back, hitting the dirt as the expanding goop flew over their heads. It stopped a short distance away, forming a boggy looking puddle on the ground.

Johnny wanted to poke it. His free hand automatically reached for a stick, since he was fairly certain just sticking his finger into the blob wouldn't be a good idea. "What's that?"

"MM'M MMMMM MMMMM! MMM MMMMM MMM MMM'MM MM MMMMM MMM MMMMM!"

Oh. Right. This guy didn't always use his words properly.

"We can figure that out later!" Yosaku admonished. "For now, just try not to step in it!"

That was easier said than done. The winged man was flinging more of those blobs now, apparently trying to hit the hunters in the head with them. Johnny and Yosaku were kept busy for a few minutes just jumping around and dodging, since both were pretty sure they didn't want whatever those blobs were made of touching their heads.

Soon, the blobs covered the ground completely. More hung from tree branches and clung to the sides of the tree trunks themselves, slowly oozing and dripping. A few even hovered in mid-air. It was impossible to get within sword-reach of the winged man- and he was still throwing blobs of tar-like cloud, making even assessing the situation difficult.

"How the fuck to we get rid of these things?" Johnny swore, clinging to a vine in the most dangerous game of The Floor is Lava that he'd ever played. Yosaku hissed thoughtfully, hanging upside down from a tree branch that hadn't yet been coated in goop.

"We might have to use up our charges… That should clean this up."

"What if he just makes more?"

Yosaku shot his partner a flat look. "We just have to beat him quickly, then."

Johnny wasn't sure he liked this plan, but they didn't really have any others. Sliding down the vine slightly to avoid another thrown Swamp Cloud Burger, the blue hunter spun the dial on his spray gun.

"Base Drops!"

"Acid Rain!"

Hissing and steaming, the corrosive droplets burned holes in the tar-like cloud, creating erratic patches where it was safe to stand. The spray also burned holes in the winged man's clothes and dissolved feathers and clumps of hair. Based on his previous stupidity regarding breathing, speaking, and dodging, Johnny was honestly surprised that their opponent thought to close his eyes in time to protect them.

The steam and smoke from the assault left the area filled with a strong chemical smell. It burned Johnny's nose and made visibility… not the greatest. The blue hunter pulled his shirt up over the bottom half of his face to block out the worst of it; nearby, Yosaku did as well. Their opponent didn't have the same presence of mind. Gasping and sputtering, the winged man actually paused to vomit as he rubbed at his nose, which had quickly grown red and dripping.

"YOU LITTLE-!"

Eyes glowing red, the winged man lunged to grab the nearest of the hunters- which happened to be Johnny. Unable to get away fast enough, the blue hunter found himself pinned to a tree, feet dangling a good half meter from the ground. Johnny tried to pry the fingers away from his throat, but it was like trying to make Big Bro Zoro let go of a sword. Impossible.

Trapped this close, Johnny could actually see a name tag on the stranger's purple suit. Gedatsu. Well, this idiot probably would forget his own name if it wasn't on him somewhere. And that information didn't really help anything. Whether he thought of the man strangling him as "the winged man" or "Gedatsu," Johnny was still slowly losing both his vision and the feeling in his limbs as he struggled to breathe.

"Jet Punch!"

A fist slammed into Johnny's stomach at incredible speeds, forcing him to give up what little air he'd managed to inhale. Had he been on the ground, he would've doubled over in pain; as it was, he curled up into a ball insofar as he could. In doing so, Johnny realized that his opponent was close enough to be kicked… Although he wasn't sure what good that would do, especially since he was no martial artist. Still, it was worth a shot.

"Haeh!"

"PUT HIM DOWN!"

Johnny's clumsy, two-footed kick struck Gedatsu in the chest at the same moment Yosaku rammed into the winged man's back. The resulting force flipped him over Yosaku's head, forcing Gedatsu to release and drop Johnny as he was thrown backwards. Bruised, bloody, and breathless, the winged man crashed to the ground on his back.

This apparently wasn't quite enough for Yosaku, though, as the green hunter went to town in a rather vicious show of rage. Kicking the winged man repeatedly, Yosaku eventually swung his sword around through a tree, felling it on top of Gedatsu. Ashen faced, the winged man didn't try to get up.

"I… really hate it when people hurt you," Yosaku panted. There were tears welling up at the corner of his eyes. "I can't be alone, Johnny, I just can't. Please…"

"Not planning on leaving you," Johnny assured his partner. The blue hunter rubbed his aching throat. "But… Next time, it's your turn to play damsel in distress, alright? I've done it two for two, and it's getting old."

"Trust me, Bro, I don't like it any more than you do." Yosaku wiped his eyes. "I promise, next time we fight someone we really shouldn't, I'll let them catch me so you can have a turn at being the hero."

"Rather nobody got caught at all," Johnny grumbled. Rolling to his feet, the blue hunter groaned. Great, just great. Being crushed into a tree like that had damaged his sprayer and tank. That would take days to fix.

"You okay, Bro?" Yosaku approached, worried. Johnny waved him off.

"I'm alright, long as we don't get into another fight. Nothing a drink and a little walk won't fix."

Of course, getting back to looking for Big Sis Jones and Big Bro Usopp was hardly a little walk. Johnny groaned as he looked at the jungle all around them. So many trees… So many vines and weeds… And what if there were more braindead morons waiting out there to try and kill them? They should try to meet up with one of the other groups- safety in numbers and all that.

Just as he thought that, Johnny saw smoke rising over some trees. Ah. There. That must be someone from their crew. As he set out to investigate, thought, Yosaku grabbed his hand.

"Hold it, Bro. Aren't we supposed to collect any of those weird shells we find?"

"Yeah… Why?"

Yosaku pointed at the unconscious form of Gedatsu. "He was using a bunch of them to make those sticky things and speed up his punches. We should collect them."

"Good plan." That way, if someone else attacked them, they'd have some sort of weapon besides just their swords. Not that either of the hunters knew how to use Dials, but Johnny was sure they could figure it out. The blue hunter crouched to loot their fallen opponent, his protective partner standing guard over him to make sure they weren't surprised.

-V-

"HAAAHRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Yama the destroyer of relics charged at them with a wild yell. Years of experience had Robin analyzing him as he approached. A large, powerful man; he would try to win by strength. He was rather fast for his size, so she couldn't rely on speed alone to beat him, but she'd seen faster. And there was a coarseness to his movements that made Robin think she could exploit his lack of training. She folded her arms in front of her chest.

"Would you like me to-?"

Robin glared at Sanji as the cook stepped nervously forward. The blond jumped back as if she'd burned him with her gaze. "I just wanted to help."

"I'm fine on my own, Gospodin Cook."

"Stomach Mountain!"

That brief moment of distraction as she turned to look at Sanji left Robin open as Yama slammed into her from the front. His great strength sent her tumbling head over heels; Robin closed her eyes as she spun through the air in order to avoid vomiting. She tucked her head in just before her back came down on the golden stairs, knocking the wind out of her. Robin could feel the bruises blooming on her spine as she took a second to catch her breath.

Above her, Yama turned to Sanji, a smug smirk on his face. "Now that that tramp is out of the way, let's see how long you last, little man."

Robin's brain lit up with red heat. Just because she preferred more revealing clothing did not make her a tramp. She rolled to her feet, crossing her arms as she stood, her eyes glowing red as she glared at Yama. Her movements apparently startled Sanji so much that the cook couldn't even jump to her defense in his slightly creepy way.

"Once Fleur: Slam!" Eleven hands rose up from the stairs and knocked Yama backwards. The towering man tried to find his balance; Robin didn't let him.

"Cuatro Manos: Shock!" A flurry of petals showered around Yama's head as Robin slammed four fists down with all her might. The blow sent the towering man crashing to the ground.

"You little-!" Yama surged back to his feet, lunging at Robin with a flying tackle. "Axe Mountain!"

"Tres Fleur!" Robin sprouted three more hands for another blow even as the Axe Dials strapped to Yama's chest exploded with slashing force. Cuts split open across her chest and shoulders as she slammed into a wall; her shirt tore in several places. Robin coughed, her throat burning as much as her brain.

"Mouton-!"

"No!" Robin glowered at Sanji, fiercely enough that both he and Yama froze. "Back down, Gospodin Cook! I can do this myself!"

If they hadn't spoken earlier, Sanji probably would have argued. As it was, the cook froze mid-kick, brow furrowed with confusion. If this went on too long, he probably wouldn't be able to help but get involved.

"Nueve Fleur: Twist!" Robin sprouted arms around Yama, immobilizing him. His great size prevented her from twisting hard enough to damage his spine and made containing him difficult when he started struggling.

"Punch- ergh- Punch Mountain!" Yama writhed and flailed. Robin held him tight, but couldn't keep him from getting one arm partially free. The edge of his hand clipped her cheek as Yama lurched past her.

"Just… Get… Down!" Sweat beading on her brow, Robin twisted harder, some of her arms snaking down to wrench one of Yama's legs around and to the side. There was a loud popping sound as his knee dislocated.

"Arrgh!"

Yama dropped like a rock, unable to balance on one foot in that position. His head cracked loudly against the golden stairs. Then there was silence. A thin trickle of blood emerged from under Yama's hair.

Pulling a handkerchief from her pocket, Robin began dabbing blood her own cuts. Luckily none of them seemed to be bleeding much. Her shirt was a bit of a more pressing matter- not that it had been expensive or a favourite, but climbing around the jungle with rags hanging off of her would be inconvenient. Quickly sprouting a series of fingers, Robin tied the frayed edges back together as best as she could. Hopefully it would hold until they got back to the ship.

When she looked up, Sanji was staring at her- and unusually for the cook, he looked disturbed rather than like he was trying to ogle her bosom through the tears in her clothes. An improvement. "Can I help you, Gospodin Cook?"

"I… I didn't think a Devil Fruit called the Flower-Flower Fruit could be that powerful… Or disturbing." Sanji shuddered. "That finger thing…"

His voice trailed off. Robin smiled. "I can be much more disturbing than that, if you like."

"I believe you!" Sanji's voice squeaked as he took a step back. Odd; Robin had been sure the cook was old enough that he was no longer going through puberty. The archaeologist sweetened her smile as she crouched to deal with the fragments of the broken burial vase.

"Is something wrong, Gospodin Cook?"

"No!"

Ash and shattered crockery… Nothing she hadn't seen before. But mere moments ago, this one had been whole, practically untouched for hundreds of years. Robin was disgusted. Centuries of history lost, and all because some Neanderthal wanted to pick a fight. But perhaps there was still something to be learned from it. Pulling a small bag from her pocket, Robin swept up the ashes and potshards with meticulous care. Perhaps she could recreate it well enough to record the patterns and read any text that had been painted or engraved on the surface.

Sanji approached nervously and crouched to help her pick up the potshards. "Robin De- Robin… Why didn't you want me to help you? There's no harm in crewmates having each other's backs…"

"Two reasons." Robin glanced at the cook through her bangs. "First of all, as you can clearly see, I did not need your help, Gospodin Cook. And second, unless you would have offered the same assistance to, for example, Gospodin Swordsman, this falls under the same subject we had words about earlier."

"Oh…" Sanji visibly deflated. Scooping the last bits of ash and pottery into her bag, Robin let a small, genuine smile slip through the ones she wore as a mask. He was learning.

-V-

Whenever Chopper had read about fencing and sword duels, it had always started with the combatants circling slowly, taking each other's measure. This was nothing like that. Zoro rushed in without hesitation, barely giving the reindeer time to scramble away and immediately proving Chopper's earlier hypothesis that the swordsman loved battle. Why else would he be so eager to go blade-to-blade with a man who had sounded so pleased at the idea of killing them?

Zoro led with an X-shaped strike from two swords, although it was intercepted by a mighty downswing of Ohm's cloudy blade. Neither strike hit home- at first. But an instant after cloud clashed against steel, Ohm's sword stretched and twisted and suddenly the tip was jabbing into the back of Zoro's shoulder. It was a shallow wound, not dangerous in and of itself. Zoro shook off the pain with a growl, stepping to the side and using his swords to knock his opponent's blade away as the Straw Hat swordsman made a series of rapid, testing jabs.

What that shallow strike meant was disturbing, though. Chopper had never heard of a sword that could literally bend to its wielder's will.

Chopper edged to the side, trying to move around the battle and see if there was any way he could help. Steel and cloud clashed rapidly, a ringing song. But in between the rings, Chopper could hear and see and smell the blood where Ohm's cloudy blade twisted around Zoro's guard to kiss the swordsman's skin.

Less than halfway through his circuit of the battlefield, Chopper's nose was assaulted by predator fear. He leapt backwards, having nearly walked into Holy without realizing it due to his focus on Zoro's battle. The little reindeer popped into Heavy Point and assumed a fighting stance, whimpering. But Holy didn't seem to be paying him any attention.

{{Go Ohm! Kick his ass!}} The giant dog's wagging tail thumped against the ground.

The hair stood up all over Chopper's body. Every instinct screamed wolf-smell-run-fast-now. But... He was a Straw Hat. He must not run. Even so, he was very, very confused.

"Aren't... Aren't you going to fight me?"

Holy's tongue lolled out of his mouth to one side. He turned towards Chopper only partially, keeping one eye on his human's duel. {{No. Why?}}

"We're... We're enemies..." Chopper shuddered, covering his nose with one hand in a futile attempt to block out the wolf smell. Holy blinked at him slowly.

{{No we're not. Ohm hasn't told me to kill you, so you can't be my enemy.}}

That... What? Chopper's brain froze for a moment, unable to compute. That... Holy was either the best-trained or the dumbest dog the reindeer had ever heard of. Possibly both. But hey, it worked in his favour...

Chopper sat down beside his apparently not-enemy, fighting hard to ignore his screaming instincts. "So... How long have you been with Ohm?"

{{Since I was a puppy!}} Holy announced proudly. {{My whole family lives with him! But I'm the biggest and the strongest, so I'm the only one who gets to come hunting.}}

Well, that was something to be grateful for, at least. There would be no pack of giant dogs leaping out of the bushes to interfere with the fight. Chopper wrinkled his nose. "Do you like hunting?"

{{Yep! But sometimes it can get boring when Ohm goes all swordy.}} Holy's wagging tail momentarily drooped before resuming at full power. {{But that's okay! I have sticks! Lots and lots of sticks!}}

So saying, the enormous dog uprooted a small tree and started chewing on it. Chopper sweatdropped and considered edging away. But that would be rude...

"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

Zoro's strikes were coming in like rain, pushing Ohm back. The green-haired swordsman had apparently given up trying to defend against the snaking blade of cloud and was fully on the offensive. Ohm was doing an incredible job of blocking and parrying, for the most part, his gaze turned inwards with intense concentration. But as Zoro's attacks came faster and faster, more and more of them were slipping past the priest's guard. Until...

"Eisen Back!"

Ohm's sword retracted and broadened, surrounding him in a spherical shield of cloud. The priest didn't laugh, but gloating amusement was clear in his voice.

"Give up, Blue Sea dweller. Iron cloud is as hard as steel and responds to my every whim."

CLANG! CLANG! CLA-CLANG!

Zoro's swords bounced off Ohm's defenses in quick succession. The swordsman scowled, muscles tensing.

"Hard as steel means nothing. I can still cut it. Oni Giri!"

FA-SCHWING! SHING!

Three blades sliced in a familiar motion, rending through the iron cloud shell with a deafening noise. The shield disintegrated when it was breached. Growling in annoyance, Ohm reformed his sword and stepped in to cut a massive slice across Zoro's legs as the Straw Hat swordsman stepped in with a sharp thrust. Only a quick leap backwards saved the limbs from needing to be sewn back on.

"You'll have to do better than that if you want to kill me." Zoro's stance changed; for a moment, Chopper imagined a crab standing behind the swordsman as he turned his blades. Then he struck with a blinding flash, swords coming together like a guillotine on Ohm's arm. "Gazami Dori!"

The sky priest tried to pull back, but he wasn't quite fast enough. Zoro's strike tore great gashes in Ohm's arm, removing chunks of skin; Chopper was pretty sure from the looks of it that that hand was broken.

It must've hurt something awful, but Ohm made no more sound than a faint hiss as he pulled back to regroup, kicking up some dirt to force Zoro back for a second, the green-haired swordsman covering his eyes. "Holy! Quit goofing off! We need to finish this guy quick if we want a chance at the others!"

{{Mmmmm... Sorry.}} Holy got to his feet. {{That's my cue. It was nice to meet you, little fuzzy man.}}

Chopper stood there, blinking, as Holly lunged forwards and bowled Zoro over, pinning the swordsman to the ground. What...? Dog-wolf-predator-fear-stink-fangs... He didn't know what to do. The little reindeer started shaking. He should help Zoro... But Holy wasn't a bad guy, for a predator- a bit dense, but well-trained and a decent fellow- and his instincts screamed to run...

"Gah!" Pinned under Holy's paws, Zoro was unable to fight back as the dog began... Licking him? Thick drips of saliva made the swordsman's hair stick up and his shirt cling to his body as he squirmed to get up. Ohm snarled in exasperation.

"Kill him, I meant! Not play with him!"

{{Yes Ohm!}} Holy barked an affirmative, his huge, sharp teeth suddenly in full view and aimed for Zoro's head.

Chopper panicked. Before he knew what he was doing, the little reindeer had popped into Heavy Point and extended his hockey stick. He couldn't run over to Zoro fast enough, but he could... "GET OFF OF HIM!"

The puck fired by Chopper's stick flew harmlessly over Holy's head- the doctor's hands were shaking too much to achieve any kind of accuracy. Despite this, though, the dog froze mid-bite and took a step back, releasing Zoro with a quiet snort.

Wasting no time, the Straw Hat swordsman leapt to his feet... only to immediately slip in a puddle of giant dog slobber and stumble sideways into a tree. This gave Ohm an opening...

"Eisen Whip!"

Clouds as hard as steel whipped around Zoro to leave a great gash on his back, oozing blood. The green-haired swordsman rolled forwards as the blow struck, saving himself from major damage, but that wound still needed to be patched before he lost too much blood...

"Holy, finish this little bastard off already!"

Teeth bared, Holy lunged in again. Still halfway panicked, Chopper yelled the first thing that popped into his head.

"SIT!"

Holy sat. He... The dog was so well-trained that he'd listen to anybody? Before Ohm could say anything, Chopper shouted more orders. "Close your eyes! Cover your ears! Don't listen to a word anyone says until I boop your nose!"

The enormous dog did as he was told. Ohm looked livid. Eyes flashing red, the sky priest turned his blade towards Chopper.

"You little-! Eisen Whip!"

"Body Check!" Chopper rushed Ohm, stick held across his chest, ears shaking with nerves. The sky priest dodged the attack easily; Chopper in turn shrank down into Brain Point so that the iron cloud blade glanced off his antler, soaring over his head.

Of course, just as it had with Zoro, the iron cloud twisted in the air, the point coming back towards its intended victim. Chopper raised his hockey stick, not sure if he could get out of the way in time... Not sure if he could even block in time as the blade raced towards his head.

"Gyuki: Yuzume!"

Zoro lunged forwards, two swords stabbing together like the horns of a bull. Sandai Kitetsu and Yubashiri struck the blade of the Eisen Whip from the side, piercing the iron cloud clean through. The strange sword's movement stopped; the blade shattered.

Ohm froze for a moment, stunned. The sky priest's mouth fell open.

"Surrender," Zoro said simply, turning side-on to the priest. Sandai Kitetsu pointed at Ohm's head.

"Not on your- ack!"

THUNK.

Chopper gave Ohm a good crack on the back of the head with his hockey stick before the sky priest could refuse. They needed to find Jones and Usopp; there wasn't time to be drawing this fight out any more.

The reindeer turned to Zoro apologetically, suddenly wondering if the swordsman would be upset with his interference. "Sorry... I just thought..."

Frowning, Zoro looked away, almost as if he was pouting. Chopper's ears drooped. "I shouldn't have interrupted your duel..."

"It's alright," Zoro said at last. "He broke the code of the duel first when he called his dog in."

Dog... Holy... Jumping, Chopper scrambled over to the giant dog and booped his nose. Holy opened his eyes and uncovered his ears, tongue lolling out as he rose. {{What're we doing next?}}

He didn't ask after Ohm, or after the result of the fight- he just wanted instructions. Chopper's heart sank. The little reindeer reached out and patted Holy's paw, ignoring the instinct that cried for him to run-hide-leap.

"Are you okay, Holy? Did Ohm hurt you?"

{{What?}} Holy tilted his head to the side, uncomprehending. Chopper clarified.

"To teach you to obey. Did Ohm ever hurt you, or scare you, or deprive you of food when he was training you?"

{{Eh? No! Why would he do something like that?}} Holy's tail thumped emphatically against the ground. {{Ohm is a good master. He brushes me every morning and feeds me lots of yummy treats and he built a huuuuuuge doghouse for me by his normal kennels so I can sleep near my family.}}

The great hound's head drooped, though his tail continued to wag. {{I like being near my family. And Ohm... I get scared when I'm alone. What if no one wants me? I know I'm freakishly huge... So since I'm ten times the size of all the other dogs, I have to be ten times as good a boy so Ohm will keep me.}}

Chopper's eyes went wide, his heart aching. Poor puppy... He knew exactly what it was like to fear whether people would want you because you were different. Fearful instincts forgotten, the little reindeer shifted into Heavy Point and wrapped his arms around one of Holy's legs.

"I'm so sorry you had to deal with that..."

Holy bent down and licked Chopper's forehead. {{It's alright. I'm a very good boy, so Ohm is good to me.}} The giant dog glanced at his unconscious master. {{He's gonna be okay, right?}}

"Yeah." Chopper was 99% sure that the sky priest would make a full recovery, although he might have a pretty bad concussion. "He might be mad at you, though. I don't think you listening to me counts as a good boy to him."

It broke Chopper's heart to have to remind Holy of that, but... It was true. And whether the dog said he was a good person or not, Chopper had no way of knowing how Ohm would react to their fight, whether he would punish the hound. He didn't know what kind of understanding the two of them had or what the sky priest's temper was like.

{{Oh...}} Holy's tail stopped wagging, suddenly drooping to hang between his legs. {{I hadn't thought of that. I just... wanted people to like me...}}

Tears welled up at the corners of Chopper's eyes. "I'm so, so sorry..."

"Hey..." Zoro cleared his throat as he removed the Eisen Dial from Ohm's sword, reminding Chopper of his presence. "Not everyone here speaks animal, you know. What's going on?"

"Ohm will be mad at Holy for listening to me." Chopper looked up at the swordsman with watery eyes. Zoro sighed.

"We don't have room on the ship for a dog that big."

"I know..." Chopper's ears drooped. "But... Can't we at least find him somewhere else to stay in case Ohm is angry? Someone else who'll feed him and brush him and tell him he's a good boy?"

Zoro looked from Chopper to Holy, then nodded. "Alright. I bet that angel girl we met- Conis- she'll probably know of someone looking for a dog."

"Yay!" Chopper danced a little jig. "Now we just need to go get Holy's family!"

That gave Zoro pause. "Family? How many dogs are we finding homes for?"

Good question... "Holy, how big's your family?"

{{I have fourteen sisters and seven brothers,}} the great hound announced proudly, {{And mom and dad and four uncles and five aunts and fifty-six cousins.}}

"Eighty-eight more," Chopper informed Zoro. The swordsman sweatdropped.

"That's a lot of dogs..."

-V-

"Chrrrrrrrr-up..."

Gan Fall patted Pierre's neck as they approached the Shandoran village. "I know, old friend. Trust me, if need were not so dire, this would not be my choice of place for a meeting either. But I must warn them; should those young pirates fail, they will be in as much danger as our own people."

"Hrrrrrrrrrrrr..." Pierre's wingbeats faltered; the horse-bird glanced fearfully at the flashing lights coming from Upper Yard.

"Don't worry; I don't expect you to stay with me and put yourself at risk." Gan Fall would never have asked that of his oldest friend. He ran his armoured fingers through soft, pink feathers. "I want you to leave, do you understand? When I go to talk with the Shandian chief, I want you to go back to Angel Beach and go out to sea with the rest of our people."

"YARK!?"

Pierre nearly stalled mid-wingbeat. His feathers fluffed up; he shook his head and whistled a negative. He didn't want to... But that wouldn't do at all. He had to be safe. Gan Fall tugged lightly on the horse-bird's mane.

"You listen to me, Pierre." The old knight felt tears welling up at the corners of his eyes. "You have to live, do you understand? Dropping in here could very well mean my death. I can't see any of my friends die. I am old, and much of the blame for this debacle with Enel rests on me, so to try and set it to rights is my duty, but you must not share my fate. Go back to our people; find a new rider and teach them to guide and protect Skypiea, whatever is left of it."

"Trrrrrrr-!" Pierre scowled, inasmuch as was possible for a creature with no eyebrows. Gan Fall tugged on his mane again.

"Please, old friend. Do it for me, so I'll know our people have someone looking out for them."

"...Grrbrrgrr..." The horse-bird nodded reluctantly, tail drooping. Gan Fall hugged him around the neck.

"Thank you, Pierre." The old knight held tight to his lance and slid sideways from his saddle. "You take care of yourself, now, and choose a rider who will do the same."

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAR!" Pierre circled above the village for a moment as Gan Fall started to plummet. For a moment, the knight thought his friend would attempt to rescue him; then, suddenly, Pierre wheeled around and made his way back towards Angel Beach as fast as his wings could carry him.

His heavy armour meant Gan Fall fell quickly, his cape flapping about him as if it intended to slow his descent. Though he'd had Pierre approach fairly high, it took a very short time- mere seconds- before the knight of the sky crashed into the cloudy ground of the Shandian village. The Impact Dials in the heels of his boots absorbed most of the shock, allowing him to land on his feet without destroying his aging legs. Gan Fall was quite pleased he'd thought to make such additions once he'd passed his 50th birthday- they were the reason he could continue fighting without ending up in the hospital every other day.

Clouds flew up around Gan Fall as he landed, momentarily obscuring his vision. He could still hear, though- the gasps and angry yells of the Shandians, the click and swish of weapons being drawn and readied. Just from the sound he could tell how many people surrounded him, roughly where they were...

Too many for an old man to fight, however good his armour. But that was fine; he hadn't come to do battle.

Gan Fall plunged his lance into the ground as the clouds cleared, bending to one knee and removing his helmet. He bowed to the chief, standing behind two young warriors armed with blades made from the fangs of a giant serpent.

"I know you have plenty of cause to hate me, but please- I come in peace. I come to warn you."

"Warn us of what?" The chief's voice crackled with distaste. "Why should we care about any news you bring?"

"Because Enel's anger has been roused like never before, and all that stands between our combined lands and utter destruction is a group of teenage rogues from the Blue Sea."

The Shandian chief scowled. "Wyper... What did you do?"

"I don't think it was him." Although to be fair, it could have been; Gan Fall didn't see the berserker among those who surrounded him, which meant Wyper was probably causing trouble for someone somewhere. "It appears that Enel is enraged by the presence of these Blue Sea dwellers, some of whom have powers as strange and formidable as his own. There's no telling what he may do if he overcomes them on the field..."

Gan Fall took a deep breath. "Especially since one of my own helped them infiltrate the depths of Upper Yard."

The chief's scowl deepened. "That warrior should be commended. But what good is your warning to my people? We've tried before, and we cannot fight Enel, nor will we allow you to use us as shields as your pale beach-dwellers flee."

"That's not what I want at all." Gan Fall looked up staring the chief in the eye. "I'm offering you a place on our ships. Come with us, and should these lands fall, we will find new ones together."

"As what? Your servants?" The chief shook his head. "Your people cannot be trusted to treat with us as equals. They wish only war with us."

"That's not true." Gan Fall slumped. "My people war with yours only because it is all they have ever known. Those living now, even myself, grew up with the threat of Shandian raids even as your children have grown up knowing only fear of Enel."

"Because of what your ancestors did!" The chief was furious now, his eyes glowing red. "It was your people that drove us from our ancestral lands and forced us to resort to raiding and hiding!"

"I know..." Gan Fall closed his eyes. What could he possibly say to make this right? They weren't his people, but at the same time, they still were. They shared an island and at least a partial history. Neither side would ever be able to go back to the way they lived before; they had to find a way to live together and move on. "But this generation is blameless for that crime. It happened long before any of us were born."

Dropping his helmet, Gan Fall knelt fully and bowed as low as he could, his head and hands touching the ground. "Please... If you must exact some penance, let it be I who has to pay- I who once called myself God over our two peoples. I'll gladly bear the burden of my ancestor's crime. Just, please... Let me make this right. Let me find a way that our peoples can live in peace."

That made the chief pause. "You would take all their crimes upon yourself?"

"Yes."

"Face any punishment my people saw fit to give you?"

"Yes."

The chief tapped his staff on the ground thoughtfully, stroking the tassels that hung down from his wolf's head helmet. "And you will see to it that your people respect the terms we intend to offer regarding living together in peace."

"As much as I am able." Gan Fall knew saying that was a gamble, but he had to be honest. As much as he wanted to guarantee everything, he was just one man. He could no more control the actions of every individual Skypiean than he could hold the wind in his hands.

"Good." The chief nodded and motioned with his staff, indicating Gan Fall should rise. He did so, his knees creaking. There was no alteration he could make to his armour that made kneeling and crawling any easier on his old bones.

Placing a hand on Gan Fall's shoulder, the chief looked him in the eyes. "We can speak more of terms later, with the gods to witness our pact. For now, let it suffice to say that our peoples must be equals and the ways of old Shandora must be respected- and that the borders of whatever nation we found together must remain open."

Gan Fall's mouth fell open. Wasn't there a danger in letting just anyone into their country? Before he could say anything, though, the chief was speaking, having apparently predicted his protest.

"There will always be a risk, but there is a greater risk in isolating ourselves. Enel subjugated and may yet destroy both our peoples because we knew nothing of his power over lightning, where it came from, or how to combat it. Something like this must never happen again."

Yes... That was very true. Gan Fall nodded his agreement. "I hadn't thought of that."

"I could tell." The chief's serious visage broke into a sardonic smirk. "I think that perhaps our peoples will be better off together, each able to think of things the other has not. Once we finalize terms, that is. Until then..."

The chief's voice rose, although there was little enough noise for him to need to shout over. None of the Shandians had been speaking, too focused on what Gan Fall and their leader were saying.

"Everyone, we must move! There is a risk that Enel in his madness will strike our village from the sky. Until we know if it is safe to return, we must take to the sea. Grab only what you absolutely need, then head for the canoes. We will meet with the Skypieans on the white-white waves and await news of the fate of our home."

"What of Wyper and the others who went to Upper Yard for the Trial of the Gods?" someone asked. "What of Aisa? She's gone missing."

The chief froze for a second, his face going dark. Then he bowed his head. "We cannot send anyone after them- there may not be time. We must pray that the gods will protect them, and that Aisa will sense our activities with her Mantra and know to follow."

"I'm so sorry..." Gan Fall offered. Perhaps he should have let Pierre stay after all; with the horse-bird's aid, he could have flown search and rescue easily. "I can search for them if you like."

"No." The chief's voice was steady, but his eyes were hiding tears. "Without you, there can be no negotiations with your people. You will remain with me."

"Very well." Picking up his helmet, Gan Fall bowed his head. "What would you have me do, then?"

"Pray with me. I will teach you of our gods, and you will help me pray for the safe return of my granddaughter."

-V-

Clang! Crunch!

The golden ship lurched into a cave wall as Nami fought to steer it down the tunnel. This caused a piece of railing to break off on the side opposite to Lisa. The little girl screamed.

"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"Sorry!" A chill ran down Nami's arms as she fought to correct their course, twisting her broken Clima-Tact between the golden spheres. That was way too close. The ship straightened out, although her new position wasn't quite right either- it caused the golden vessel to sink rapidly, scraping along the floor of the tunnel.

Luckily gold didn't bounce.

Sparks crackled from the places where Enel had melted Nami's weapon. She hoped Usopp could fix it. Taking care to keep her hands on the rubber grips, the sailing master shifted her weapon again, trying to guide the gilded ship around a kink in the tunnel. She was mostly successful, aside from knocking a small antenna against the stone hard enough to bend it.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Lisa groaned as their ride lurched through the air, sometimes scant millimeters from the ground.

All too soon, the door was in front of them- and approaching quickly. The golden ship must've been flying faster than Nami had thought. She shifted the remains of her Clima-Tact once more, trying to repeat what she'd done earlier. There were a few fizzles and sparks, but no bolt. And the door was getting closer and closer...

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAART!

Finally, when they were less than a dozen meters from the great stone door, a burst of lightning exploded from the bow of the ship. Nami's stomach jumped briefly into her mouth as the loss of power made the ship drop again. A great cloud of dust blew back over them, accompanied by small shards of blazing hot stone. The sailing master closed her eyes tight. Some of the stone shards struck her in the face and on the shoulders, adding tiny scars amidst her freckles.

SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

The sides of the ship scraped along stone, digging gouges in the soft gold. Nami's bolt of lightning had split the ancient door in two, but the opening wasn't quite large enough. The golden ship lost speed quickly. They were going to get stuck...

Not if Nami could help it.

"Thunder Tempo!"

Even though it was broken, twisting her Clima-Tact just right still yielded an extra burst of electricity- Nami just had to be careful not to let any stray sparks strike her hands. Throughout the golden ship, propellers and engines suddenly whirred like Zoro priming up a Tatsumaki. The lumbering vehicle shot forwards and upwards, the tight stone ripping deep gouges in the sides and tearing off some of the hatches.

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Lisa clung more tightly to the railing, her eyes shut tight. Nami could see tears on the little girl's cheeks. The sailing master wished she could comfort her crewmate, but if she tried to leave this bizarre helm, they would likely plummet to their deaths. The best she could do was shout reassurance as the golden ship lurched and twisted off course due to the force from the rocks.

"Don't worry Lisa! We're gonna be okay!"

"I'll believe it when I have two feet on the ground!"

That was... understandable. Nami wasn't sure she believed her own words herself. The golden ship was disgustingly unstable, and air didn't offer the same control as water. The thing should've had wings. But it didn't.

"Come on," Nami muttered, twisting her Clima-Tact once again, "Fly straight..."

The golden ship was reluctant to oblige. Her attempts at stabilizing it only caused it to roll to the other side, propellers humming loudly. And then there were the thermals rising up from the forest, erratic bursts of hot air that followed the flashes of light and fire below. Some of those were probably from their crewmates fighting the sky priests.

. . .

Hopefully Jones didn't get herself killed going after that lightning man. They should probably work on that blind rage of hers.

Feet slipping as the golden ship went over nearly on its side, Nami shook her head. There was no time to worry about that now. She had to find a way to land before she could think about what any of their friends were doing.

"Beanstalk!" Lisa screeched suddenly, her eyes still scrunched tight. Nami had to do a double take. Sure enough, there was an immense beanstalk rising out of the jungle, climbing around itself to pierce the clouds above. How had the little girl seen that with her eyes closed?

A sharp twist levelled them out- for a short while, at least- and sent the ship careening to the left of the beanstalk. They lost altitude from that, the hull of the ship skimming along the forest canopy. But even if Nami had been able to properly control it, she couldn't see anywhere open enough to land.

Then there was a tremendous flash of light from practically right underneath the bow. Nami found herself temporarily blinded, her vision covered with blotchy white and blue and green. She stumbled backwards, almost falling from her place between the great golden orbs that somehow steered the flying behemoth.

Somewhere in front of her- and above her, as the ship's bow was forced into the air- Lisa sobbed. Nami spread her feet wide, trying to keep her balance, and wedged her Clima-Tact in between the orbs as firmly as she could.

The ship spun into the sky, a child's top in reverse. Nami held on for dear life, twisting her weapon in an attempt to slow the spinning. It took longer than she would have wished, and the loss of speed was accompanied by another sudden loss of altitude. Sparks danced on the broken staff.

For a second or two, they were in free fall. Nami scowled. This was not how this was supposed to go. She'd been able to swim almost as well as a fishman since she was six; by the age of ten, she could sail vessels that usually required upwards of a dozen crew. She could master any vessel. She would master any vessel, and that included this lumbering sky hulk.

There had to be a way... Wait. What if she used her Clima-Tact as the horizon line? Raising one side and lowering the other should cause it to bank, just like a seabird. And if that worked, rolling her weapon forwards and back should raise and lower the bow... It was worth a shot. Letting her Clima-Tact rest lightly in her hands, the Straw Hat sailing master shifted one side up and one side down in a smooth, steady motion.

The ship turned.

Levelling out straight, Nami grinned. "That's more like it! Alright, Lisa, I think I've figured this thing out. I'm gonna try and find a place to set this thing down."

"The sooner, the better." Still clinging tightly to the railing, the little girl looked as green as her calming paints.

Nami brought the ship around in a wide arc, searching for an opening in the trees. It was hard. The jungle was dense, and what few gaps there were in the vegetation were filled with other obstacles. One was thick with smoke, the ground impossible to see; the next revealed towering pyramids and statuary built entirely of precious metals and stones. A third gap proved too small to land the ship through, although it did give Nami a glimpse of some of her crewmates. Zoro and Chopper were walking through the jungle...

Guided by a giant dog? She'd have to ask about that later.

The fourth time was the charm. Nami started their descent towards an open area that appeared to have been blasted with some tremendous force, the trees levelled flat and charred to a crisp. Red and gold atop a turquoise serpent the size of a building alerted her to Luffy's presence, which made the place all the better, and she saw something that might have been Jones and the lightning man facing each other across the charred field. And then came the shout.

"KITEN!"

"Kitten?"

There was a second massive burst of heat and light. This time Nami did fall backwards out of position as the ship was thrown up on its stern. The force of the lightning-fuelled explosion launched the vehicle backwards through the air. Breath-stealing wind pinned Nami to the deck, the only reason she didn't plummet to the jungle below.

CRANG! CLANG!

They hit something, stopping their flight dead. As the golden ship began to fall, Nami was able to rise to her feet and force her Clima-Tact back in between the steering orbs to regain control. Although navigating and steering were quite difficult with all the noise overhead making her want to cover her ears.

BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG! BONG!

A bell. The stern of the ship had crashed into a giant, golden bell. The bell continued to ring, loud enough to wake the dead. No, louder- loud enough to wake those who had been dead for a thousand years or more. It was eerie... Nami had never heard a bell that sounded quite like that before. She could almost see the ghosts of the past rising up out of the jungle.

Or maybe that was just the smoke and cloud.

Descending away from the bell as fast as she dared, Nami found her ears still numb. But her eyes were working fine, and they could see something huge and golden crashing through the trees below them, so she turned the ship in the opposite direction. Lower and lower and lower still she flew, trying to find a place to land. Her Clima-Tact was growing hotter in her hands; she could feel it even through the thick rubber grips.

Her trajectory brought her back to the edge of the golden ruins. Lower and slower than before, Nami was able to spot a place where there might be room to place the ship. Slower, slower... And tilt the bow up, like Jones had done when flying the Merry. The ship stalled a few meters off the ground, setting down with a jarring thud.

"Is it over?" Lisa groaned, slowly opening her eyes. Nami nodded, collapsing to the deck as her legs gave out. Now that they were safe, her adrenaline was draining away like bathwater.

"It's over..."

Lisa slowly unwound herself from the railing, making a quiet retching noise. As soon as she regained her feet, the little girl looked over the side of the ship, searching for a way down. It was as if she didn't trust the golden vessel to stay on the ground, even though Nami had removed its uncertain power source when she collapsed.

"How do we get dow-? Hey! Wasn't there a gold jaguar here before?"

"Don't be silly..." Nami gasped out, clinging to her Clima-Tact as it slowly cooled between her fingers. "There would've been a big crash when we landed if there was. You're thinking of some other part of the ruins."

"I don't think so..." Lisa pointed at something on the ground, her face going from green to white. Frowning, Nami rose to join her smaller crewmate at the rails.

Pawprints.

Lisa was pointing to a set of pawprints in the cloudy dirt, each almost as deep as the little girl was tall and as wide across as a table. Round, clawed pawprints like those of a giant cat.

The sailing master felt the blood drain from her face. "Well shit..."

-V-

Conis' feet slipped and skidded on the cloudy sand as she and Sandrah ran for the beach. Up ahead she could see several large, partially melted blocks of ice, the White Berets inside struggling as best they could. Some were frozen to the waist; on others, the ice went up to their chests or even necks. Many had at least one arm free, but some did not. The ice was melting, weeping... On any other day, it might've been funny to watch the soldiers struggling in it. Not today, though. Not when the need to flee was so desperate.

"About time someone showed up to get us out..." one of the White Beret's muttered. Conis didn't reply; she just started laying out heat and flame Dials around the frozen soldiers in a hex pattern. Sandrah followed suit. Each Dial was opened fully; the beach soon grew nigh-unbearably hot. Conis felt herself start sweating as the weeping of the ice blocks intensified.

Captain McKinley squinted at Conis as she laid out Dials around him. "It took you an awful long time to show up, despite being the one who called us here in the first place. Almost makes me believe you were planning something with those pirates."

"A lot's happened," Conis said quietly, not meeting the captain's eyes. "The pirates... They went into Upper Yard of their own free will, searching for some friends of theirs. Now they do battle with Enel, and I fear that he may destroy Angel Beach in his rage for our part in their arrival."

"Dammit!" Captain McKinley struggled, but it was useless. He was one of the soldiers still trapped to the neck. "We should've been better prepared- we need to go arrest them before they challenge God so he won't think we've been lax in our duties."

"It's too late for that, hoh hoh hooooo!"

The giggling voice from the treeline made Conis' blood run cold. Or perhaps it was two voices- there was a strange harmonic dissonance to the speech. She slowly turned to look, fingers clenching tight around the Dial she was holding.

Two men were standing at the edge of the beach. They were absolutely identical- overweight and dressed in white jumpsuits, with goat-like faces and yellow sunglasses. Each had a crimson ribbon dangling from his back and a couple of Dials strapped to his hands. Different Dials, Conis noted; despite being identical, each man fought differently.

The sky priests Hotori and Kotori.

"Lord Enel wants everyone dead," one of the newcomers announced- Conis couldn't tell which one was which. "He told us to go kill everyone. Except the one named Luffy; that one is his."

"It's got nothing to do with the invasion," the other priest added. "Lord Enel was always planning to destroy this place. He only wanted it for the resources, to create a ship that would get him and his chosen to Fairy Vearth. You people were only a means to an end."

Everyone had different reactions to that. Captain McKinley went pale; many of the other White Berets shouted curses or spat at the twin priests. Sandrah punched the nearest ice block, shaking the soldier inside. Conis felt herself go cold, her heart dropping into her stomach... But at the same time, she didn't feel any surprise. It was the sort of thing she had always sort of half expected from Enel, though she'd never dared speak or even think it.

Then Hotori and Kotori spoke in unison, clapping their hands together. "And now, you die!"

"Chain Ball!"

"Tone Ball!"

Two balls of milky cloud emerged from the sky priests' Dial gloves. They floated gently in the air, until their makers kicked them towards the angels on the beach, causing the balls to explode as the twin priests rushed forwards.

BWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIH!

A terribly loud whistling, ringing noise pierced the air. Conis dropped the Dial she was holding, clapping both hands over her ears, but it did no good. Her head spun; her ears felt muffled and useless, as if they were covered in pillows. All she could hear was a faint echo of the sound that had rendered her deaf. She saw Sandrah's lips moving, but couldn't hear what her friend was saying.

The chain ball was much less effective than the tone ball. It exploded too close to its users, tying Hotori and Kotori together at the ankles as one of the chains flew back towards them. The twin priests stumbled in their charge, forced to stop and untangle themselves.

One of the chains did fly far enough to be a threat; Conis ducked under its flight, scooping up a small Burn Bazooka that one of the White Berets had dropped when they were frozen. Dropping to one knee, she spun the controls on the side of the bazooka and launched a burst of flame at Hotori and Kotori.

"Light of the Dawn!"

The flames caught on their sashes and ribbons; Hotori and Kotori jumped back, rolling to put out the fire. They spun around each other, giggling- or at least Conis assumed so from her attempt to read their lips- as they got back to their feet, clearly trying to confuse her as to which was which. The joke was on them, though; Conis couldn't tell anyways, but she could identify the Dials strapped to their hands with a quick look. She hadn't grown up around her father's Dial engineering business for nothing.

"Hoh hoh hooooo! Bikkuri Dial Illus-Ow!"

As the brothers were partway through their spin, Su bounded away from Conis' side and raced around them, biting one in the buttocks and ripping a chunk out of the seat of his jumpsuit. The fox then darted between her victim's legs as he tried to grab her, racing back to Conis and triumphantly presenting her prize of white cloth and a scrap of spotted underwear.

As Su was biting the priest in the butt, Sandrah also raced towards them, smashing the brothers in the face with Heat Dials. Conis couldn't hear what her friend shouted as she struck, but she could see the looks of pain on Hotori and Kotori's faces as they stumbled back. Heat Dials may not have burned quite as badly as Flame Dials, but they still stung badly, and Sandrah had struck close to their eyes.

Conis kept her focus on Hotori and Kotori's faces, trying to read their lips to see what the brothers would do next. The custom of shouting out one's techniques was difficult to take advantage of when one couldn't hear, but she did her best.

"Fire Ball!"

"Tone Ball!"

Whether the second tone ball went off when its creator kicked it, Conis couldn't tell. Her ears were still non-functional. She dropped and rolled to the left, doing her best to avoid the fireball that soared towards her. She was a bit slow, though; her antennae were singed, as were the feathers of her right wing, leaving the limb stinging. Sandrah got hit too, due to her close proximity to the blast, but Su was left unharmed as she pressed close to the ground.

Having Sandrah engaged in melee made aiming difficult. Conis turned down the power on her borrowed Burn Bazooka, firing a small, blinding burst into the sky priests' faces. She closed her own eyes to prevent being blinded and losing another sense during battle.

"Sunlight on the Grass!"

While Hotori and Kotori blinked away spots from their eyes, Su rushed in again. The little fox dug her teeth deep into the arm of one of the priests, worrying at his wrists. He let out what looked like a yelp of pain, flailing his arm around until Su lost her grip and flew off, smacking into the base of Captain McKinley's ice block. Su whimpered as she got to her feet, favouring her left forepaw and shaking her head.

While that was going on, Sandrah grabbed the chain that had previously tripped the twin priests up and swung it into the front of their ankles, hard. Hotori and Kotori dropped forwards, landing on their hands and knees. Before they could rise, Conis' best friend wrapped the same chain around both their necks, tugging it relatively tight as she knelt on their backs.

There was a faint clink as she did so- Conis' hearing was coming back. It was still a bit muffled, but at least she could make out most sounds clearly.

"Did you really think we'd just give in and let you kill us?" Sandrah hissed. "Don't you know? Everyone living at Angel Beach has been trained from birth to react to Shandian raiders for generations."

Conis nodded. "We may be terrified of Enel's strange powers, but we know Dial Fighting better than you could imagine. And you're nowhere near as threatening as a Shandian raiding party led by the Berserker."

Not that their presence wasn't still frightening- at least at first, Conis had been sure Enel would strike from the skies against those who dared resist his priests. But the fight had passed and the lightning had grown no closer; it still flashed in the sky over Upper Yard. Enel hadn't heard them, or possibly he was occupied with something more important.

"You'll never get away with this," one of the priests said- Conis still couldn't tell if it was Hotori or Kotori. "Enel will take his vengeance upon you before we depart for Fairy Vearth!"

Sandrah pulled the chain tighter. Cocking her borrowed bazooka, Conis put on a brave face. She wasn't actually sure if what she needed to say next was true, but she had to make the brothers believe it.

"No, he won't. There will be no trip to Fairy Vearth... At least, not for you. Fairy Vearth is a paradise, a place of endless vearth and growing things. Murderers like you don't deserve a place like that." Conis forced a smile and looked at the flashing lights in the sky, praying that she looked hopeful. "Those pirates... I sent them there. I gave them directions so they could find their friends. They are the sort who deserve paradise. Enel will fall before them."

Hotori and Kotori struggled to protest, but the chain Sandrah had wound about their necks made that difficult. The brothers gagged for a minute, glaring at Conis. Eventually, though, the lack of oxygen became too much for them and they passed out, faces thudding into the sand.

Conis turned back to resume thawing the White Berets. Many of the blocks of ice had shrunken visibly; a few soldiers were nearly free. Turning her borrowed bazooka on a low, steady fire setting, Conis began flaming the ice to melt it faster. Sandrah picked up another fallen weapon and followed suit. Captain McKinley shot them an approving look, his arms breaking free of the ice encasing him.

"You are quite capable fighters. I'd never thought young girls would take on a couple of Enel's priests." Then the captain wilted. His face went pale. "I can't believe God would use us in such a way... That he would destroy our island for his own gain... That's not how a ruler should act. We need to evacuate everyone... We need to get everyone out in case those pirate friends of yours fail."

"The evacuation is already underway," Conis informed him. "But more help would always be appreciated, and we certainly couldn't leave you behind."

There was a loud schloop as Captain McKinley wrenched his feet free of weakening ice. The captain nodded his thanks. Signalling to his men, he saluted Conis and Sandrah; his squad formed ranks behind him.

"Thank you, Conis, Sandrah. Now, let us head to the marina; we are at your service for whatever is needed to facilitate the evacuation."

-V-

It took a long minute for anyone to move or say anything or do anything. For a moment Luffy's brain was full of nothing but the word WHAT? How could Jones have heard-? In the middle of a fight? She was supposed to be smart! That had to be the dumbest thing he'd ever seen.

Kiten didn't even sound like kitten!

"I should be more satisfied by this," Enel muttered, staring at Jones' unconscious form in disbelief.

"I should be more upset about this..." Luffy added, momentarily unable to cut through his confusion to actually punch the guy.

"I should be more surprised by this," Usopp said, facepalming.

"I should be more worried by this," said a little girl hiding in the shrubs near Usopp. Her eyes were shining brightly, large and glazed with awe.

"Zu'u los ni drey eldraag," Ruatha groaned, trying and failing to drag his somewhat charred form from the ground. The little dragon smelled like burned scales; his tail was still twitching out of control from all the electricity.

Luffy turned to stare at Ruatha. "How are you not surprised?!"

"Los monah," was the dragon's only response. Luffy just shook his head at that. He supposed Ruatha knew Jones better than anyone.

. . .

Hey, this was the first time he'd understood what Ruatha was saying. Cool!

Shaking free of the shock that afflicted them all, Enel turned to look at Luffy. "You... Your heartbeat was at the beach. What is your name?"

Huh? Wasn't this guy supposed to be able to read minds or something? Or maybe people had been excel- exam- saying his mystery power was bigger than it was. Luffy made sure his hat was secured on his head.

"I'm Monkey D Luffy, future king of the pirates. And kicker of your ass." He'd given Jones a chance, but this was clearly beyond what she could handle. A captain had to protect his crew...

Enel's eyes narrowed. "You... You're the one who claimed to be immune to my powers."

"What?" When had Luffy ever said that? Was this because Nami's lightning didn't hurt him?

The lightning man with funny ears began to laugh. "Yahahahaha! Even if I can't strike you down with lightning, you're a fool! No man can challenge a god!"

"You're not a god," Luffy replied, sliding down Nola's neck to land on the ground. "You just have one of those mystery element Devil Fruits, like Ace. He can make fire from everywhere like you make lightning."

That made Enel pause, but only for a brief moment. A mad grin grew across his face; yep, this guy was definitely one crazy potato. "Making lightning isn't all I do. That is what makes me a god. Can your Ace create life? Can he?"

A bolt of lightning arced away from Enel's hand, leaping over the trees and ruins to strike something elsewhere on the island. Lines of glowing light traced over his hand; the limb itself deformed into strange shape, hardly looking like a hand anymore at all. Luffy frowned. That didn't seem like it would be any good in a fight.

Oh well. Ass kicking time.

Luffy was three steps into charging Enel when the ground shook beneath his feet. The young captain paused. Nearby, Usopp hugged a tree tight while Ruatha staggered over to Jones and stood unsteadily over her, growling protectively. Enel continued to laugh.

"Yahahahahaha!"

The ground continued to shake, the tremors growing stronger. Off to one side, trees swayed like flowers when a dog charges through a garden. Something gold soon became visible... And then a great shadow soared briefly overhead, landing behind Enel with a resounding thud. It was a huge golden cat, its skin marked with strange scenes and grinning faces, its eyes carved from huge semiprecious stones. Its head was as big as the Merry's figurehead, its body the size of a fishing vessel.

And then it roared.

"HAURAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

The entire forest shook. Usopp squeaked behind his tree. "That would be so cool if it wasn't going to hurt us!"

Luffy reacted much more aggressively. If Enel was gonna call this thing- this incredibly awesome thing- to help fight him, then they'd fight. "GUM-GUM PISTOL!"

His fist glanced off the curved dome of the cat's carved head, deflecting into the air. The gold panther turned and focused on him, then lunged faster than Luffy could follow, growling as its mouth split wide. Golden fangs closed around the rubber boy's waist, scooping him up and biting down.

It didn't hurt that much- the teeth weren't sharp- but it was still very uncomfortable. With his organs squished about by the massive fangs, Luffy couldn't breathe very well, and he couldn't fight if he was trapped in a statue's mouth.

Below him, Enel continued laughing away. "Yahahahahaha!"

"Dammit! Quit fooling around! Gum-Gum Bazooka!"

The palms of his hands slammed into the gold panther's head, cracking its jaw. The great beast dropped him, raising a paw to bat him into a tree before he could hit the ground. Luffy bounced off rough bark; the tree snapped in half from the impact, the top falling to the earth with a loud crash.

Enel's deformed hand twitched. That must be how he was controlling the panther. But when Luffy lunged for him, the lightning man slipped aside with a crazed grin. "I know your every move as soon as you think of it, Luffy. My mantra sees your heart and mind."

Dammit. That sounded like that Haki stuff that Jones and Sabo talked about. He'd have to figure out a way around that. Until then, though, he had a giant panther to deal with. Luffy leapt into the air as the great cat tried to crush him with a paw. Flipping through the air, he struck downwards with both feet. His strike bent one of the great cat's ears.

"Gum-Gum Spear!"

The snapback from his attack cause Luffy to flip again, just in time to avoid being crushed between two paws as the panther reared. His feet came down on the statue's muzzle. Luffy shifted and struck again, feet slipping on the smooth gold.

"Gum-Gum Gatling!"

A semiprecious stone cracked beneath his fists, lines spiderwebbing its surface. Beneath him, Enel yelled in pain; Luffy couldn't look to see what was going on. The panther, too, roared in pain. A paw came up and swiped across, claws catching on Luffy's side and flinging him into yet another tree. Unlike the teeth, the claws actually seemed somewhat sharp- nothing special, since gold didn't hold an edge, but there were enough pointy bits to leave bloody pinpricks under Luffy's ribs.

The rubber boy growled. That hurt! His mind leapt unbidden to fighting the giant tiger with Ace and Sabo. Right... They'd used their pipes to block its claws, because claws hurt. Reaching over his shoulder, Luffy pulled his pipe from its place on his back and twisted his arm, racing back into the panther's face. Leaping high, he released his arm and let it spin as he lunged for the panther's lower jaw.

"Gum-Gum Buzzsaw!"

Ka-chink-krrrrrrrrrrrr!

Two paws snapped on either side of him, catching his pipe and arm in between. Luffy was left dangling for a moment. Then the gold statue tossed him in the air, rearing up and catching him in his mouth again as he came down. Arms flailing out to the side to keep them free, Luffy tried a retaliatory strike.

"Gum-Gum Bell!"

Sproing!

His head bounced off the gold panther's ear, the rounded, shining point digging into his temple in a way that would've drawn blood had it been any sharper. That sent an involuntary thrill of fear through Luffy. He shuddered. It had been way too close to scooping out his eye... Like a great golden spoon.

Time to try something new. Luffy inflated himself quickly, trying to force the panther's mouth open. "Gum-Gum Balloon!"

The panther resisted, trying to crush Luffy with its jaws. Huge teeth pinched around his waist, squishing his insides together as his lungs fought to expand. Luffy frowned, inhaling more... Then finally the golden jaws popped open, dropping him as he exhaled to rapidly deflate.

His mind was still on the giant tiger, though Ace and Sabo weren't there. He needed a bit of distance to make this work, though. Kicking out at the panther statue's side, Luffy drove himself away. "Gum-Gum Stamp!"

"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

The panther chased after him, pouncing and digging its claws into the ground where he had just been. Luffy rolled to the side a split second before it landed, flinging himself between two thick trees. They were just perfect. He wedged his pipe in between the trunks, hauling back as much as he could on his stretchy arms. And then...

"GUM-GUM ROCKET!"

He slammed into the panther's armpit as it was partway through turning. The impact was actually hard enough to make Luffy's head ache and his ears ring. It did a lot more to the panther, though. Gold was a soft metal- even Luffy knew that. The panther's body folded around his Rocket strike like a cheap suit, flying into the air and slamming hard into the ground. Its landing caused even more folds and crumpling. Luffy hauled himself out of the massive crater in its side, breathing heavily as he scanned his metallic opponent for any sign of movement.

"Moooooaaaaaaaaaaaaah..."

Twitching feebly, the deformed panther tried to rise. It couldn't get more than two paws under itself, though. The great golden head tried to twist towards Luffy, perhaps to grab him one more time, but its own bulging, twisted shoulder got in its way. With a final crackly, growling moan, the huge statue went still. The lightning went out of its eyes, leaving them dull and cracked as Enel's control of the statue fell away.

Luffy pressed a hand to his side. It came away with a spattering of blood, but not too bad. Nodding to himself, the rubber boy turned his attention back to the real threat...

-V-

Crap! This guy could create lightning and bring statues to life to kill them! Usopp whimpered, hunkering down behind his tree. What could he do? He was out of ammo, and even if he wasn't, nothing he had was meant for blowing up something that big! They'd need the ship's cannon!

He should get the Merry's cannon!

. . .

He didn't know where the Merry was!

Shit, he needed to get out of here, or find a shield, or something. Usopp glanced around for a piece of wood big enough to use as cover if he had to move. The sound of footsteps approaching distracted him; Enel was coming around the tree.

"Yahahahahahaha!"

The lightning man seemed unhurried, though he was moving quickly. His laughing face was terrifying, a bizarre grimace of wide eyes and too many teeth. Enel's skin crackled with electricity, his one hand glowing blue where he had deformed it to control the panther statue. Usopp was too frightened to tell whether that act of puppetry was causing the lightning man any level of distraction.

"You... I've seen dozens like you, long nose. A pathetic braggart who hides behind more powerful friends- but they won't save you here. You're hardly worth the effort of killing."

Usopp grimaced nervously, trying and failing to force a smile. "S-so you'll let m-me go, right? I-if I'm n-not worth th-the effort..."

"Oh, no. I'm not that kind of a god. The unworthy cannot be allowed to remain; the world must be cleansed. One Million Volt Vari!"

A single fist of glowing lightning slammed into Usopp several times. The gunner fell back, trying to cover his head. Each touch made his heart jump and his muscles go stiff as electricity tore through his body. His hair smoked; his skin reddened and blistered where Enel touched him. The flashing lights covered his vision in green and blue spots.

"AAAAAAAAAH!"

He had to get away. Usopp grabbed his mallet on instinct, flailing it about in front of him as he staggered back, trying to escape. One swing actually met its target, although he hadn't even really been trying for that; there was a loud snap as the rubber mallet crashed into the side of Enel's knee.

The lightning man's leg splayed out to the side at an angle at which legs were not meant to move. Enel went down on it, astonishment and pain crossing his face. Usopp was able to scramble back a bit while the false god pulled himself together, turning the limb to pure lightning in order to hold it together and control it.

Enel leered menacingly. "Well, well, well... So, the little insect has some bite after all. We'll soon snuff that out. Maybe a slightly higher-powered lamp will fry this little moth. One Hundred Million Volt Vari!"

"IIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Usopp fell to the ground and rolled to the side as the first lightning-enhanced punch swung towards him. Enel tracked his movements, but... Wasn't quite on target. His strikes brushed by millimeters above Usopp's head, crashed into the ground half a centimeter to the left of him. So... Manipulating the panther to fight Luffy did cut down on his concentration. Maybe even prevented his Haki from working right.

. . .

He was still fucking terrifying.

Scrambling along the ground, Usopp tried to race by Enel, hoping the lightning man would be blinded by his own flashing punches. He tried to crack his mallet hard on Enel's toe as he did so, although the lightning man skipped back just in time to avoid the strike.

"Sango!"

A wide blast of electricity spewed forth as Enel waved his hand. Usopp dove across the ground, trying to get out of the way. But whether he was too slow or the lightning wave was simply too large to avoid, he still got hit. The attack flung Usopp across the forest floor, sending him tumbling and rolling, every muscle in his body going stiff.

The taste of copper filled his mouth; he'd bitten his tongue. Usopp rolled stifling onto his hands and knees. Everything hurt... He had to get away. This guy was made of lightning! If he didn't get away, he was going to die!

"Monah... Fen praad..."

Ruatha's voice made Usopp freeze. The little dragon was nudging Jones with his nose, trying to make her wake up. His white scales were as singed and blistered as Usopp's skin. The Shandian girl Aisa was trying to help, tugging on Jones' arm while staring fearfully at Enel.

If he left, Usopp realized, Enel would immediately turn on them. And they couldn't escape.

Usopp dropped to the ground, pretending his arms had given out beneath him. It was an old trick, one bullies fell for every time. Enel was no exception. The lightning man came closer, his footsteps so light they barely disturbed the dead leaves on the ground.

Heart leaping into his mouth, Usopp did his best not to breathe visibly. His eyes were barely cracked open, watching his opponent through the haze of his eyelashes. Stay still, stay still... He needed Enel to think he was dead for as long as possible.

"Hmmmph..." Enel gave Usopp a rough nudge- almost a kick- with his foot. "Not quite as pathetic as I thought. Still, no match for a god. The likes of you must be cleansed before the way to Fairy Vearth will be opened."

He pulled his arm back, gathering electricity to attack. Shit! He'd seen through it! Usopp lunged to his feet without thinking, rubber mallet swinging in broad, barely controlled arcs.

"USOPP RUBBER HAMMER!"

Crunch! Crack!

"El Thor!"

A massive pillar of blue-white light shot down from the sky, homing in on Enel and Usopp. The gunner tried to leap out of the way, but he couldn't make it far enough. His muscles went stiff as lightning surged through them, flinging him into the air with the force of the contraction. Usopp landed heavily on his side when he came down, dizzy and disoriented, his lungs struggling to breathe against the pain in his... Well, his everything.

Biting back a whimper, Usopp dragged himself trembling back to his feet. His hand was clenched so tightly around the handle of his mallet so tightly that it hurt. He didn't think he could have let go if he'd tried.

"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Lurching forwards, Usopp flailed his stiff arm wildly. He didn't think too much about aiming or where he wanted to strike- if he did, Enel would simply dodge.

BZZZZZZZT!

Instead of dodging, Enel cast forth an electric charge from his hand. The mild crackle of lightning latched onto the trident he'd made from his staff. It drew the golden weapon to his grip as if pulled by a magnet- but gold wasn't magnetic. Enel swung the trident up just in time to block Usopp's mallet.

One fist, crackling with lightning, swung at Usopp's chest. The gunner fell back on his ass to get out of the way, mallet flailing up to strike the aggressing arm in the elbow.

CRACK!

"GAAAH! YOU INSOLENT LITTLE-!"

Enel's injured arm hung limp, his elbow at an odd angle- sprained or potentially broken. Dropping his trident, the lightning logia backhanded Usopp with his good hand, knocking the gunner flat on his back. A poorly thought out attempt at kicking his opponent in the shins as this happened left Usopp's feet tingling.

Then Enel froze for a moment. There was a mighty crash behind him, the sound of his golden panther crumpling in on itself after something Luffy had done. It was followed by a ragged gasp from Enel as the lightning logia doubled over, clutching the glowing hand of his disabled arm.

"Moooooaaaaaaaaaaaaah..."

Enel recovered- in a manner of speaking- before Usopp could properly take advantage of his pause. Lurching forwards, he aimed a heavy kick at Usopp's ribs, but his aim was off and he struck the hand that held his rubber mallet instead. The tool was sent spinning a short distance away; Usopp scrabbled after it through the undergrowth. When Enel tried to kick him again, Usopp gave the lightning logia a solid whack right on the toe.

"OW! Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Well, that didn't sound very godly. Just livid... and tired. Enel began to glow blue, his outlines warping and shimmering, waist thickening, hair bursting out from under his bandanna.

"Clearly I've underestimated you, little moth. No matter... You'll still perish before the might of a god. Max 200,000,000 Volt Amaru!"

His transformation completed, leaving Enel looking like the heavy, angry gods Usopp had once seen in a book about mythic Wano. Clapping his hands together, the lightning logia released an enormous burst of electricity. It was too big, to fast, too close to dodge... The bolt of lightning struck Usopp full in the stomach.

PAIN!

Usopp went incredibly stiff, then incredibly limp. His joints popped; his skin and muscles ached and stung and burned. Something smelled like it was on fire; he couldn't tell if it was him. Through it all, though, he refused to relinquish his hold on the one thing he had that could hurt this monster... The one thing he had that could protect his friends.

For a moment, even his chest seemed frozen from pain. Usopp couldn't tell if his heart had stopped briefly or if it was beating a million times a second. In that moment, Enel loomed over him, his glowing blue outline dominating the gunner's now foggy vision.

Enel nudged Usopp with his foot. "See, little moth? This is your place. Even a tengu such as yourself is no more than an insect before the might of a true god."

Thump. Thump. Thump. Blood rushed in Usopp's ears as his heart decided to start working again. No time to think, no time to feel... Simply go up as had and fast as you can, putting the full weight and power of your body into a leaping strike.

"USOPP HAMMER!"

"YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAW!"

Usopp drove his mallet up as hard as he could into the nearest convenient target- Enel's crotch. The lightning logia's eyes went white, rolling back in his head; his glowing blue transformation fell away. Enel collapsed, first to his knees, then flat on his face in the dirt, both hands cupping his abused groin. His breathing slowed to a quiet whine, then trailed off into silence.

Unconscious.

"I'm quite proud of my nose, I'll have you know," Usopp gasped, spitting out a gob of blood. "I got it from my mother."

He felt like he was going to die or be sick or pass out or something. Usopp swayed where he stood, trying to decide which of those options sounded best. He was exhausted... Everything hurt... He wanted to sleep for a week, but he wasn't sure if it was safe.

A familiar, slightly worried voice shook the gunner out of his stupor. "Hey Usopp, you okay?"

Who? Oh, right, Luffy. Usopp looked up just in time to see his captain sliding down the twisted remains of Enel's giant golden panther. Luffy's face was creased with a small frown. Pulling himself together as much as he was able, Usopp raised his free hand to shoot his captain a thumbs up.

"I- I did it Luffy! I protected everyone!"

"That's great!" Luffy bounced as he reached the ground, frown morphing into a wide smile. The captain bounded over to Enel's unconscious form and began tying him up- although the amount of good that would do if the unconscious logia regained his senses was questionable. But still, probably better than nothing.

"Mwahahah!" Usopp's adrenaline drained away like someone had unplugged a bathtub. His trembling legs gave out under him even as the gunner was consumed with shaky, unstoppable laughter. He had survived, dammit! Survived and won! He hardly felt it as he fell over onto his back, spread-eagled and staring up at the wide blue sky. Slowly, painfully, the fingers clenched around the handle of his mallet began to uncurl.