Rating: T, I guess.

Disclaimer: I don't own "Aggretsuko".

A/N: Well, I love this show. I swear Retsuko is my spirit animal. Here is my homage to their cuteness. This'll be a two part-er.

~ First Date ~

~ Chapter 1 ~

"She said yes, Fenneko!" Haida curled his fingers into the covers, so thrilled that he thought he might soar off into the atmosphere. Not too far though because he wanted to see that adorable yellow furry face, and those cute white ears, and gentle dark eyes…and that fluffy little tail. "She said yes!"

Fenneko sighed. "Okay, I hear you. You don't have to shout."

"This is…this is…incredible. Amazing. A dream come true." He sighed, relaxing back in bliss. His heart was a kite that flew on the wind with a myriad rainbow of streamers chasing after it. How could a simple "Sure, I'd love to" uplift him so much? Whatever he did, he could not screw this up.

"So, do you have an idea for your first date?"

Haida glanced out the window into Tokyo, a city with constant, roaring noise, with grime and glass and people everywhere. Oh, so many people. They crowded the train, pushed together in restaurants and bars and theaters. There was no privacy at all. He wanted an openness, green, fragrant. "I want to take her on a picnic in the park."

Taptaptaptaptap- -Fenneko had returned her attention to her phone. "Retsuko's not really an outdoorsy type."

"It's not like I'm taking her camping," he said, stung with Fenneko's implication. A picnic was a good idea, right? Romantic, relaxed, and he knew where he'd take her. Yeah, and even if she didn't love the picnic, wouldn't it be a good "couple" experience? They could joke about how the ants got in the dessert or how a grasshopper had hopped down his shirt or something.

"You're mooning again," Fenneko said, still texting like her life depended on it. "Nothing good comes from going out in nature. It'll be a disaster."

Haida bit the inside of his cheek, a dappled forest floor in front of his eyes. "Miss Negativity. Do you have to poo-poo everything?"

"I'm a realist. Expect the worst and you'll never be disappointed." Fenneko finished whatever message she'd been composing and glanced up at him. "Anyway, assuming you'll be discharged later, are you coming to work tomorrow or are you lazing around another day?"

"If the doctor clears it, I'll go in tomorrow. I can tell you're missing me," he replied.

Fenneko leveled an annoyed glare at him. "You'll miss your arms if you say that again. I'll see you tomorrow." And with that, she left.

Haida spent the rest of the early afternoon daydreaming about Retsuko. He and Retsuko could hop on a train and walk to the little clearing inside the cherry trees on the side of the river bank. He could make some spring egg rolls and some rice and dango, or he could pick up some bento boxes and drinks. He would ask her a million questions because he wanted to know everything about her- -but he realized how creepy that sounded, so he amended it to as many questions that weren't prying. If he could get her to laugh…that would be the pinnacle of the date.

Then the doctor whisked in with a businesslike air, interrupting the fantasy he'd built, and proceeded to outline Haida's discharge from the hospital. Within the hour, dressed, forms signed, he stood to the side of the wide entrance doors and pulled out his phone. Half a dozen missed voice messages and texts from his mom alone. Despite not feeling up to a barrage of conversation, he hit call.

She answered it before the second ring. "Haida, honey! Are you okay? What did the doctors say? Are you still in the hospital? Should your father and I come to see you? Do you need anything? Honey, are you there?"

Haida laughed and meandered down the paved walkway toward the train station. People streamed along the sidewalk, beside, in front of, and behind him. "Mom, I'm fine. I'm walking out of the hospital right now. Everything's good."

"Oh, that's wonderful, sweet-ums. Are you taking tomorrow off too?"

"Nah. The doctor cleared me to work. Besides, I'm not a construction worker or anything. I'll sit in my chair and take it easy. It's not too much strain to type on my keyboard."

"That's good to hear, honey. Oh, your father wants to speak to you. Let us know if you need anything. Love you!"

"Love you too, Mom. Thanks for the call." He waited a beat. "Dad, you there?"

"Hi, son." His father's gruff voice was soft with an undercurrent of concern. "It's good to hear your voice. You had your mother worried there for a bit."

"I wasn't dying!"

"We're your parents. We're going to worry. And your mom's been wondering when you'll find a nice girl, settle down, and have some grandbabies. You know, it was this time of year that I first laid eyes on your mother."

Well, that didn't take long at all, thought Haida as he framed a tactful response. "These sort of things take time. She's gotta be just right, Dad."

"Humpf. Don't dwaddle. This your prime time in life, son! Get your nose out of those books and get in the field!"

"I'm working on it, okay? I've asked a girl out. I should go…I'm getting on the train."

"We're glad you're feeling better, kiddo. Your mom and I love you. You should call more often!"

"I'll try. Love you too! Bye," he said.

The conversation had exhausted him, so he kept a low profile as he rode the train to his stop. Someone's elbow dug a hole in his lower back, and in his attempt to shift, the edge of a seat barked his shin. Geez! There was no space to breathe. He let people bump by him as he exited the car, thinking of Retsuko and what cute outfit she would choose to wear on their date. Those matching skirts and blouses were attractive. He wondered whether all her clothes matched and maybe what her definition of casual would be.

Before he realized it, he was facing the door of his apartment. Yep. Good ole 4C. The place had a gross staleness to it, and as he opened the window to let in fresh air, the quietude disturbed him. After the attention at the hospital- -between the doctor, the nurses, Fenneko, and Retsuko- -being alone felt…lonely. Without anything better to do, he opened the fridge. Leftovers, leftovers, leftovers, and he didn't feel like cooking anything new.

His phone rang, cutting through that silence. He brought it out his pocket and to his astonishment, Retsuko was calling. Wha…? "Retsuko?"

"Uh, hi, Haida. You at home yet?"

"Yes. I'm in the kitchen as we speak. Are you okay?" To be honest, he didn't expect to speak to her so soon and hearing her voice put him off kilter.

"Oh," she offered a weak laugh, "I'm fine. I was actually wondering…you haven't been home in awhile, and you probably don't want to do grocery shopping, so…what kind of take-out would you like?"

"Take-out…?"

"Yes. My treat! Anywhere and anything you like. How bout it?"

"Retsuko, you don't have do that," he heard himself saying. Fenneko's voice came at him from the back of his mind: No, you idiot, don't make her hang up. Be selfish and make her come over. "I mean, really, I don't want to put you out or anything."

"It's no trouble, no trouble at all. Now tell me what you'd like, please."

He was powerless when she asserted herself, so he made the best concession he could. "Have you had dinner yet?"

"Um…no, not yet, Haida."

"That's perfect! You pick your favorite take-out place and order double of everything. Bring it on over and we can have dinner together here, if…if that's okay?"

Silence. Utter and complete silence, so much that he thought the call dropped. It probably wasn't a long pause, but it was long enough that Haida could count his heartbeats until she replied.

"You want me to…eat with you?"

"Yeah, c'mon. It'll be fun," Haida said. Was he pathetic for cajoling her? Yeah, but he was all-in at this point. "It'll be like…a trial first date. And my apartment is clean"- -relatively so, in his opinion- -"so what do you say?"

"I, uh…" There was the slightest little tremble that marked her hesitation.

"Retsuko, of course you can say no if you want to," but I'll be devastated, which will cause my pneumonia to flare up, he wanted to add, and I'll be back in the hospital for another week. That or the heartbreak would kill him. "I mean it."

"No, no, I…actually, I think that sounds like fun. Okay. I'll be over in an hour."

"Keep me posted," he said. "See you soon."

The second he hung up, he tossed his fist in the air and whooped as loud as he could. Then, because no one was around, he did an embarrassing jig and butt-wiggle. "Retsuko's coming over! Retsuko's coming over! Yay, yay, yay! Let's go!" Of course, he had to sit and catch his breath a moment, having forgotten in the first place the reason Retsuko was visiting him.

Finally he got himself together and started a mad dash to tidy up the bachelor pad. Loose papers tucked into drawers, check. Trash tossed into the chute, check. Toilet paper on the roll and the lid down, check. Okay. What now? He was in the middle of shoving clean clothes into a bureau when a polite knock at his door interrupted him.

Retsuko was here. Holy crow, his palms had gone clammy. Don't be a nerd, Haida. He flung open the door. "Let me…uh…help with those?"

It was not Retsuko at the door. Instead, his neighbor, Mrs. Doi stood at his doorstep. She was a silver furred Shiba dog, face well worn with a prosperous and fruitful life. "Oh, I'm so glad to find you home, Haida. I haven't seen you for a few days. Has everything been okay?"

He blinked from his disappointment, but extended a hand to her elbow. "Please come inside, Mrs. Doi. Would you like some tea?" She seemed out of breath.

"No, thank you, Haida-dear. I can't stay long. I'm on my way to play mah-jong at the senior center. What about you? I was very worried! I stopped by a few times this week, but you weren't home."

"I was sick, and ended up staying at a friend's up to now." He was sorry for the white lie, but there was no point in worrying her.

"Tsk, tsk." Her hand went to his forehead with motherly concern. "I thought you looked flushed. Perhaps you're still running a fever?"

"No, no, nothing like that. I was…cleaning house for a guest."

"Oh, well. I won't keep you long. To come to the point…I was wondering, could I impose on you to take care of Fuiji for me this weekend?" Fuiji was Mrs. Doi's beloved goldfish. "I would like to visit an old friend who lives out of town. Would that be asking too much so soon after your illness?"

"This weekend," Haida repeated. Fuiji required at least three feedings per day. Maybe it would be okay. Their picnic would only be a few hours. "That should be fine. No problem."

"Thank you. You are a sweetheart." She clucked him under his chin and warmed him with a loving smile. She was his mom-away-from-mom. "I'll leave a little something for you on the countertop for your trouble."

"Oh, no, you don't have to. Really, it's no trouble."

Mrs. Doi laughed as she waved away his protest. "Get some rest, you poor thing. I'll be back Sunday evening, about dinner time."

Then from around the corner came Retsuko. Or rather, her ears poked from behind a large brown paper bag that she held in her arms- -and how was she walking without seeing anything? He stepped in to help her and when he lifted away the grease-spotted bag, his knees weakened with her grateful smile.

"Thanks, Haida. I wasn't sure I would make it without tripping," she said. Then to Mrs. Doi, who stood agape in the doorway, "Good evening, ma'am. I'm Retsuko. I work with Haida."

"Wonderful to meet you, Retsuko," Mrs. Doi replied. "I assume you are Haida's honored guest?"

"I guess…that would be me."

"Well, you two enjoy yourselves. This old lady should get on the road if she wants to get to the senior center on time. Good bye," Mrs. Doi said as she stepped around Haida. He caught a broad wink and a thumbs-up from her.

"Uh," Haida said. Boy, didn't he sound intellectual. Don't be a moron. Invite her in, thought-Fenneko commanded. He gestured to his apartment. "Shall we?"

"Thanks. I'm sorry it took so long. There was a line," Retsuko said. Her tail swished side-to-side as she walked. "I hope you like plain ole Chinese food. It's what I usually eat for dinner when I'm feeling sick."

Haida set the food on his table and started pulling out glasses and dishware from his cabinets. He heard the paper bag crackle open. "That sounds great. To be honest, I'd been hankering for Chinese food at the hospital. Something that's not so healthy, you know?" Good, good. Keep the conversation light. "I have some water or beer to drink. Nothing fancy."

"I better have water. My yoga instructor gets after us if we don't hydrate properly."

"Water it is." That's right. Fenneko said she was doing yoga now. "How's the yoga coming along?"

"Good. I don't think I mentioned it, but Gori and Washimi go there too."

Haida set aside the full water glasses. "The head of marketing and the president's secretary? That's some yoga class."

"We've actually become closer because of it. I was so sore at first, but they pushed me to keep coming back. Now it's much easier for me," she said. "You know, you should come try it sometime!"

"Try yoga," he said and grimaced at the wall before schooling his features. "I don't know if I'd be any good."

"No one's good their first class." Retsuko had arranged all the containers. His stomach rumbled- -he hadn't realized how long ago lunch had been. "The yoga instructor's a guy, and there are two other men in the class. You wouldn't be the only one."

"I'll think about it." And he would end up doing whatever would make her happy. He set down their glasses and handed Retsuko a pair of chopsticks. "Let's eat!"

"Let's!"

Their conversation was fluid and happy- -no dramatic or dark subjects for them- -and consumed a good three-quarters of the Chinese food she brought. He was enchanted with her yummy sounds as she ate a bite of everything around her plate, swirling the lo mein around a good chunk of sweet and sour chicken and munched. They had sat back in contentment when Haida deemed it a good time to introduce his initial thoughts on their first date.

"Say, Retsuko. I was wondering…about our official first date," he glanced from his plate to her face. She gazed at him with expectation. "I thought we could do a picnic in Shinjuku. Would that be…would that be okay with you?"

"A picnic would be lovely," she replied. "I don't have any plans this Saturday. I'm free the entire day."

"Saturday sounds great. How about lunch? And since you bought dinner tonight, I'll make our lunch arrangements," Haida said. Yes, yes, yes! "I don't want to you to worry about anything, okay?"

"Thank you."

They made some final arrangements and Haida decided to walk Retsuko to the station. Not that he would be able to stop a mugger or anything, but he would worry about her being by herself. Even though she repeated how fine she would be, he insisted. It was the polite thing to do, he told her.

When her train arrived, he told her goodbye and waved as her train left. Then, for the second time that day, he whooped as loud as he could and did his victory dance. He had a date with Retsuko, finally!

A/N: And so this concludes the first chapter. I'm only planning one more after this, so nothing long and drawn out. Until next time, dear readers.