In Season 4, Episode 1 "Natural Selection Part 1", Rita says three little (barely audible) words to Chris Lorenzo that should have changed everything. Sadly, both Chris and the Silk writers ignored what Rita said until Season 5… but we won't discuss Season 5. This story explorers what might have happened if Chris had listened and responded.

"Choices and Second Chances" by Chris Corso

The nightmares wouldn't leave Chris Lorenzo alone. The dark voices and visions continued their assault.

"I need you to love me, but you don't, do you? It's her, isn't it? It's RITA," Debra Bouchard screamed. Her insanity chilled Chris. The rage and hatred directed at his partner horrified him.

He wanted to scream YES! It IS Rita, and now, I'll never get a chance to tell her… Debra pointed her gun and fired, but the bullet never reached Chris; instead, he heard a man's evil laugh-the all too familiar laugh of an enemy Chris had thought long gone.

"Lorenzo! I can't wait for you to see what I'm going to do to your girlfriend… Are we having a good time now? You know, the last thing on her mind won't be you-it'll be me..."

"Lantman!" Chris shouted. Standing before him was serial rapist and murderer Charlie Lantman, aka "Good-time Charlie". "But I…"

Lantman cut him off.

"Thought you had killed me? Stopped me? Not this time, Lorenzo. Watch this…" Lantman suddenly had Rita and held a knife to her throat.

"Help me, Chris!" Rita begged, but her words were smothered as Lantman forcibly kissed her. Chris reached for his gun, but it wasn't there, and he sobbed helplessly as Lantman slit Rita's throat and she crumpled to the ground, dead. Chris' dream shifted forward in time.

"You're not supposed to be here, Lorenzo," Captain Harry Lipshitz told him sternly. Chris looked down at the body on the floor of Rita's apartment.

"I'm telling you —that's not Rita! Let me look at the body and I'll prove it…" Chris moved to pull back the yellow plastic sheet and steeled himself to the horrible reality of what the human body looked like after being hit with a 12 gage shotgun. He decisively pulled back the plastic. He gasped. It was Rita! Chris screamed. "No! No it can't be you, it wasn't you…"

Rita's eyes fluttered open. "Why didn't you save me, Chris? Why didn't you tell me? Don't you love me? Why didn't you save me?" she repeated.

Chris pulled back from her and from her accusations. He tried to explain. "I wanted to tell you— I wanted to tell you. I was scared; we were both so scared."

"But now you're dead, Chris. Now it's too late; it's too late," Rita screamed. "Why didn't you tell me? Why? Why? Why?"

"Dead? I'm dead?' Chris shook his head, trying to deny her words, but he began gasping for breath. As from a great distance other voices drowned out Rita's cries.

"What's his name?"

"Lorenzo, Christopher."

"Stay with me Chris, stay with me!"

"We're losing him! Cardiac arrest!"

"Charge the paddles! 200 joules. CLEAR! Again! CLEAR."

"Sinus Rhythm." Finally!

"Welcome back."

Chris gasped and slowly began to open his eyes. 'Where am I?" he thought. He feared he'd see Rita that way again-bloody, dead, accusing him. He finally realized he was in the hospital. He was alive. It been a dream, which meant he had another chance with Rita.

Rita! Chris knew she was near. He felt her, even during his nightmares—he'd felt her— felt her fear, her anguish, and her love. Chris looked toward his left and his heart skipped a beat. She was there, sleeping on a chair. She was so beautiful. An angel, he thought.

Chris tried to make his voice work to call to her. Finally, he managed to whisper. "Rita. Rita!" She looked toward him. "Good morning sunshine," he added softly.

Rita was instantly awake and the look in her eyes made his heart skip a beat again. His whole body tingled as he saw the love in her eyes. She sprang from the chair and practically jumped into his bed.

She grasped his hand and tenderly kissed his forehead. "Hi," she said, her voice charged with happiness.

Their eyes locked and they whispered together, "I love you…"

Rita saw how tired he looked, and she saw the pain in his eyes, but he'd said it, they finally said it, and she knew he meant it. She'd considered being more flippant with him, to chide him for scaring her so badly, to verbally keep running from him. But she couldn't. She wouldn't run from him again.

"I was so scared that I was going to lose you, Chris!" Tears filled Rita's eyes, but she was trying to be strong and only send positive emotions to her badly hurt partner. "Seeing you in that bed, all the blood—you weren't breathing…" Rita wiped her tears, and she knew she had to say it again. She had to be honest with him, and explain what happened.

"When the doctor came to tell me how you were doing she asked if I was your wife…" Rita paused but continued breathlessly, "I said no-I was your partner-but suddenly that wasn't enough! I don't know what changed inside me. I don't think I ever considered…" Rita stopped abruptly and closed her eyes, but after a second, she returned her gaze to Chris, and spoke, distinctly and slowly.

"It wasn't saying no that bothered me; it was the idea that I'd never get a chance to say... that I'd never get a chance to tell you..." Rita suddenly became embarrassed. "I'm sorry. You don't need this from me right now. Bad timing…"

"Sam," Chris began, "When Debra had that gun on me, it wasn't dying that scared me; it was the thought of leaving you behind, leaving you alone, and the thought that..." Chris stopped, mad at himself, ashamed. Finding his nerve, he pushed on, "that another man would capture your heart and take my place. It sounds selfish to say it. I just want you to be happy but… every woman I've ever been with has been jealous of you and they were right to be because... " Rita smiled faintly and it encouraged Chris.

Chris grinned at her. "Because I love you, Rita Lee Lance. I'm in love with you. I've loved you from the first moment I saw you. You're the most beautiful woman in the world, even after sleeping in a chair for... how long was I out, anyway?"

"Three days, and thanks, but I know I look pretty bad at the moment." Chris shook his head in disagreement. Rita's eyes shone, "Well, Christopher Lorenzo, I want to be very clear, too. I'm desperately, hopelessly, in love with you. I'm not afraid anymore, Chris. I was and that's why I pulled away from you during the Soul Search. No matter what, I'll love you forever, and I'll always stand by your side. I'll…."

A knock at Chris' door interrupted Rita. The door opened and in walked Doctor Jillian Dupree, Chris' surgeon. Rita studied Chris as the beautiful doctor stood in front of them wearing a very form fitting and stylish dress. Her eyes darted between Chris and Rita and she seemed nonplussed by Rita's presence, and her perch on Chris' bed.

"Are you in the wrong room?" Chris asked the doctor with a quizzical look and not the flirty look Rita was afraid she'd see. Chris squeezed her hand and looked at his partner, the love for her still evident in his eyes.

"She's your doctor," Rita answered, staring at Doctor Dupree with a mixture of gratitude for saving Chris' life and a strong dose of territoriality, one she'd never felt before. Chris was hers and she'd no longer share him.

"It's true. I was on ER duty the night you were brought in. I did your surgery. I'm Jillian Dupree. I hoped you'd be awake. I wanted to talk to you about your recovery…" Doctor Dupree looked at Rita.

"You can talk freely. I want Rita here," Chris told her firmly.

Doctor Dupree launched into a discussion of Chris' condition and his recovery. Rita felt Chris tense as he was told the timeline to get back to work, and Rita sensed that Chris was becoming overwhelmed. She needed to lift his spirits and pull him back to her. She needed to take charge.

"Doctor, could I have some time alone with Christopher, please? We need to talk," Rita explained confidently. Doctor Dupree nodded and withdrew.

"Snap out of it, Sam," Rita commanded. "We'll get through this! Together! You're strong, you're brave, and I adore you, Christopher! We've always been honest with each other. What are you thinking?"

Chris felt a lump in his throat as he looked at Rita. "I don't want to be a burden on you, or be away from you at work. Trust someone else to back you up, but…" Chris stopped as the fear from the nightmares returned.

"But?" Rita prompted softly as she stroked his hand and face, and smiled at him steadily.

"While I was unconscious I had nightmares that you died and that I wasn't able to save you. What if I can't cover you anymore, Rita?" Chris asked, his voice a whisper.

"You will. Give yourself some time, Sam, and some credit. You've never let me down and I know you never will." Rita squeezed his hand and willed him to believe in himself, as much as she believed in him.

Chris nodded, his fighting spirit returning. "You're right! I may need you to remind me, Sam. To shove me. The road may get bumpy. Where do we go from here?"

Rita knew that his last question wasn't about his recovery. It was about them, about the things they had finally said, about feelings that burst to life inside them.

"I don't know," Rita replied honestly. She smiled at Chris. "We'll figure it out. One day at a time. We're still the same people. Partners..."

Rita fell silent and trembled as Chris' left hand caressed her face and finally began to gently pull her toward him. Her heart fluttered and raced as their lips met in a kiss like no other before. As they broke the kiss, Rita carefully moved to place her head on Chris' shoulder. They had everything they needed. They had each other.

So where do Chris and Rita go from here? I'm not sure, but I may keep shaking the trees to see what falls out.