I OWN NOTHING

Time and time again, I will try to improve to be a better writer and make something enjoyable for me to read. If you guys happen to like that, that's a big bonus.

WARNING: I'll use the pilot version of Naruto and go nuts with the idea of a fox spirit forced to be a good guy in Nerima. Here, well, you'll see that escalate.

XXXXXX

Ranma Saotome was a determined, skilled martial artist. Trying to prove time and time again while facing crazy rivals and ridiculous scenarios just cemented that. Sadly, his luck wasn't the best. Any time he meets a quirky new face, misery and misfortune are sure to follow. Remarkably, he doesn't let it get to him. He'd face it all head on and fail as many times as needed to overcome the challenge.

And yet, he found a very odd challenge in the form of a boy in a squatting pose over a fence at the school, "Ah, what a pain. School's just boring."

Looking up, he saw a blond boy in the typical high school uniform for the place he had to attend to. Right off the bat, he stood out like a sore thumb with a pair of green goggles on his forehead. Deep cerulean eyes, bright blond hair which was cut short at the sides and combed in messy but manageable spikes, as well as his natural tan made it hard to think he was Japanese. However, he did possess some features typical of the people, if subtle. What stood out the most was the fact his cheeks had three marks on each that resembled whiskers.

"Is he new?" Akane asked, her shorter hair still caused trouble for some people to get used to it, though Ranma did like it that way.

Jumping down, the blond squatted before them. He had the black school jacket, but had it opened to reveal an orange shirt which was untucked, baggy black pants, and white sneakers. And the face he had said it all for Ranma, who knew and could smell chaos from a mile away: the newcomer was a troublemaker and he had found his next targets.

"A cute girl and some..." he tilted his head, staring at Ranma before taking a whiff, confusing the two, "Are you a boy or a girl?"

Seeing his scratch his head in confusion angered the pigtailed boy, "I've already met Ryoga after so long, I don't need this..." he grumbled to himself.

Akane, though, had to ask, "Why do you ask?"

"Eh, no reason, he has an odd scent." The blond stood up, revealing that he was slightly lanky but packed some muscle, "So, Cutie-chan, wanna go on a date?"

Frowning, Akane put her foot down literally and figuratively, "No. I don't even know you, and if you want to fight me-"

"Huh? Fight you?" rubbing the back of his head, the blond looked up, mildly annoyed, "Tch, I knew people could be weird, but fighting to get a date? What a pain..."

"How about you tell us who you are?" Ranma asked, finally losing his patience.

Grinning, the blond let out a low chuckle, "Wouldn't you like to know? Just let me ask you, are you strong?"

Nodding, Ranma stood firm and crossed his arms, a smile on his face, "What's on your mind?"

Smirking, the odd boy jumped... two stories into the air!

"W-What!?" Akane gaped at what she saw, not even Ranma could do that.

Perched atop a tree, the blond shouted, "I'm bored as Hell! So, let's have some fun! I've been putting traps all around this school to have a blast for once! If I'm going to be trapped here, I'd rather have someone fun to mess with!" turning around, the blond slapped his ass at them, "Catch me if you can!"

"That little..." Ranma gave a step forward... only for the ground to collapse under him, causing him to crash in a large hole.

"H-He really put traps!" Akane exclaimed, walking around the hole... only to trip a wire. Turning to her left, she saw a ball of living, squirming worms fly at her.

The shriek she let out echoed through the entire block and alerted an elder in a white robe with a balding head, and a very simian appearance for his short frame, "He's causing trouble again..." As the old man made his way away from the school, Akane shuddered after shaking off the worms and Ranma was shooting steam out of his ears from how mad he was.

"I'm going to make that guy eat his uniform." The pigtailed boy grumbled.

"Saotome-san?" yelled someone from the ground, a football player's head with no body to be seen.

"Ah, it's a ghost!" Akane yelped, jumping back while her fiancée froze from the shock.

"No, that crazy fox guy buried me here!" the disembodied head shouted, trying to wiggle out of the dirt, "I just felt a hand grip my ankle from the floor, and before I could blink I'm here like this! You gotta get him! A guy that dangerous doing something like this for boredom is worse than the principal!"

"The principal?" Ranma echoed due to not having met the madman yet, "What do you-"

"Just get me out, please!" the student begged, "And do be careful! Everything in this school has been turned into a sick prank for his amusement!"

"Do you even know his name?" Ranma asked while digging out the player.

"He says his name's-" and that was as far as he got before a hand popped out of the ground behind his head, gripped him, and pulled him down.

"W-What the-" Ranma exclaimed when a dirt cloud erupted, blinding him.

And when it finally dispersed, the blond from before was grinning cheekily at him while on a casual squatting pose, "Ah, don't ruin the fun. I can't let morons who got caught too easy get off easier."

Akane glared, "You're sick!"

"And bored." The fox boy shrugged, "But an old fart sent me to this place to torture me, so I may as well have a blast." He smirked at them, "Let's see if you can keep up."

Rather than think things through, Akane and Ranma tried to strike him with how close he was. Both surprised the blond, who was amazed at their speed surpassing that of normal humans. However, they didn't get to impress him enough. Leaping into the air, he hung upside down from a branch, using his feet to hook himself to the tree. Chuckling to himself, the fox boy crossed his arms, pleased at what he saw.

"He's fast." Ranma said, slightly worried.

"You're faster than me, but I think I'm a bit stronger..." the blond said, "At least I can react quickly. Anyway, you really did get my attention. Boy, I thought I'd get another monologuing weakling like that guy in blue. He just rambled of how great he was and couldn't do crap to get close to me."

"You mean Kuno?" Ranma asked, before grinning confidently, "Beating him doesn't say much, he can be somewhat strong, but Akane can beat him with her eyes closed."

"Huh..." the intrigued boy said, examining the girl before grabbing the branch with one hand and hanging from it singlehanded like a monkey, "She's kinda cute. But should anyone really fight her for a date?"

"W-What!?" the angry short-haired girl exclaimed, bright red and ready to strangle him.

He grabbed a leaf with his free hand and put it on his forehead, "Yeah, a girl I'd fight to date would have to be really kickass and look a bit like this." In that same moment, a cloud of smoke covered him.

Before a question could be made, a more voluptuous version of Akane swung from the tree branch with a single hand before leaping down. Every inch of Ranma and Akane's faces were bright red at the tight orange bikini the sexier double wore, which struggle to keep back a pair of melon-sized breasts and showed every curve of her hips. She even had longer, shapelier legs with a modestly plump but perky behind.

Suddenly, Akane's brain stopped working when she aimed a finger at her sensual copy, "M-Me!? You! I!" she sputtered, trying to make some sense.

The fake giggled coquettishly, "Surprised or jealous?" she said, and then Ranma noted a fox tail swishing behind her, "Too bad I still stuck at transformations, though." Copy-Akane said with the boy's voice.

Desperate for answers, Ranma rushed at him, which made the doppelganger shapeshift back into the troublemaking blond. Easily, the odd new student parried Ranma's punch with a hand. However, he had to grit his teeth to keep him back. Like he had said, he was physically stronger, but had he not reacted when he did, the red-clad martial artist's speed would've allowed him to land a direct hit on his face.

"H-He stopped Saotome's punch..." a student that was tied in a cocoon made of ropes gasped from the branch he was tied to, facing the ground.

"Grr, I said I'm stronger, but I don't want to get punched by you..." the blond said before pushing Ranma back, who quickly gave chase and threw three lightning fast punches that the blond barely blocked. By crossing his arms, he took the impact and winced due to not only the speed but the precision that stung.

"Eat this!" Akane growled, having pulled out her infamous mallet to smash his head with.

Quickly, the blond clasped his hands, yelping, "Dammit!" he said right before getting hit on the face.

"How's that!?" Akane asked... only to see the body become a log with a cloud of smoke, "Are you kidding me!?" she angrily exclaimed.

"Sucks for you!" he exclaimed atop the fence, grinning at them, "I'm going to be stuck in this school, but that doesn't mean I can't have a blast making fools out of real fools! But you two seem like you may get me to break a sweat!" he had a rather childish if still evil smirk, the kind of a boy about to piss over some idiot who fell on a hole the troublemaker dug up.

"Why're you even doing this!?" Ranma asked, "If you want a fight, just set the rules! I'll make sure to beat you at your own games, no matter what you throw my way!"

Suddenly, the boy went silent, his grin disappearing for half a second before it returned wider than before, "Huh? Now I'm looking forward to this." He sat on the fence, smirking, "Listen, the reason I have is that I'm bored. However, I also really dislike people like that samurai wannabe." He frowned, "Told me I was no match for him because he had a bloodline or something. It really pissed me off. That's why I'm going to make this school remember not to mess with me."

"Well, he's the kind who'd say that, but you could have just ignored him." Ranma said, trying to be understanding, "That guy's full of hot air and isn't even a challenge."

"Like I would, someone had to teach him to not talk the talk unless he can walk the walk." The blond kept frowning, worrying the two before him.

And with that said, he was gone with a whirl of leaves where he once stood. Both engaged teens looked at the school and sighed, Akane speaking first, "We can never get in without trouble."

"S-Saotome-kun, Tendo-san!" a voice exclaimed, a teacher who was crawling out of a hole with his students' help. "Be careful, there's a crazy boy that has been targeting even the teachers for not helping him when Kuno-kun mocked him! He's on a rampage!" a cloud of smoke later, and the blond appeared right beside him, feeling the man with dread "Oh no..."

"I thought teachers had to be nice to all their students, not act like one's above the rules." The blond told him with that frown from before.

Shivering in fear, the teacher tried to speak, "Y-You can't do this to us! We're your teachers! What gives you the right to treat us this way!?"

Crouching to be on his level, the fox boy put a hand on the man's head, "Like I said, aren't you supposed to be kind to all your students?"

"Y-You won't get away with this, you'll be suspended- Nay, expelled and-"

"I asked if you're supposed to be kind to all your students or just that pretty boy." The odd new student gripped the man's head, hard.

"Ow-ow-ow! Y-Yes, I am!" he gave in, crying as he told the boy, "But Kuno-kun's father is the principal, anything he says goes! Even worse, we have no choice but to do as those two maniacs say! Do you think we want to bow to that pompadour-wearing braindead kid!? You don't even want to know the other member of that family!"

Soon the fox boy's frown turned into a smile, "Hmm, sounds like fun."

"Huh?" the teacher asked, only to be amazed when the kid pulled him up singlehandedly from the pit.

Shrugging, the blond started to walk away, "You can go, teach. If it's the principal that no one can mess with, I'll ruin his day and make sure everyone knows not to mess with me."

"He'd expel you!" the teacher exclaimed.

"Eh, what's that matter?" the fox boy's question made Akane stop her attempts to sneak behind him and smash his head open with her mallet.

"What the Hell do you mean?" Ranma asked, having been close enough to almost throw a kick.

"You think I want to be in this prison?" the blond asked angrily, "My village's senile chief forced me to be here. So, I told him I'd find a way to either get out or make sure no one messes with me."

"This guy really doesn't have a care in the world." Akane whispered, before he appeared behind her with a whirl of leaves.

"However..." he placed his hands on her shoulders, making her stiffen, "Man, girls here are kinda cute. A bit plain, but nothing too bad."

Growling, Akane shut her eyes in anger, "Well, forgive me for being..." she turned around, throwing a punch, "...plain!" Ranma didn't know whether to feel sorry for the blond or not when Akane's hit connected. He never managed to avoid those, but mainly because he knew he couldn't hit her with their situation. Part of him pitied the strange fox boy. And then, he just saw his body turn once again into a log.

"I need to learn that..." he whispered to himself while Akane's fist punched through the wood.

"Heh, she's kinda strong too." The fox boy's voice drew their attention to the school entrance, a smirk on his face as he lied on his side there, "I may stay if only to mess with girls like you."

"You little..." she was nearly spitting fire as she split the log with a karate chop.

Propping his head up with an arm, the blond grinned widely, "View's nice, if still plain..."

"Huh?" Akane asked, just as a gale of wind blew on her skirt, and at the angle the blond was in he could see her plain white panties, "You're dead!"

Charging at him with her mallet in hand, the youngest Tendo sister tried to cave his face in with her weapon of choice. Rolling back and then flipping out of her way, the blond kept his distance yet again. Stubbornly, Akane gave chase and swung her mallet in a wide horizontal arc. Unsurprisingly, the fox boy managed to surprise her yet again by catching her weapon with a hand.

His face was one of smugness, "I'll enjoy my time here, then." He whispered while she tried and failed to recover her weapon.

"How about you drop the theatrics?" Ranma asked, making the two turn to him, "Far as I've seen, you're confident, but are you overconfident?"

Confused, the blond told him, "Explain."

"If you want to be the man, you gotta beat the man." Ranma told him, "So, let's bet. If you beat me in a fair fight without using your tricks, you can play around all you want. If I win, you set everyone free, leave her alone, and have to act like a role model student."

"Cocky, aren't you?" the prankster said after letting go of the mallet before casually dodging Akane's next swing by tilting his head to the side, grabbing her mallet and yanking it off her hands, "Deal."

Akane grew worried, but Ranma was smiling, he was looking forward to the fight. It started with the blond charging right off the bat. Ranma was quicker and thanked that when he barely dodged a punch to his face. Seeing the pigtailed martial artist evade his attack only made the fox boy grin wider. To retaliate before Ranma could land a hit, the new student let his body fall forward, placed his other hand on the floor to stand on it, and brought up both feet before swinging them down. Ranma was quick to block it with both arms, and felt that the trickster's words were true: he was physically stronger.

Biting back a yelp from the strike he just parried, the red-clad boy threw a kick. The blond got hit right in the gut, getting him to growl as he lost his balance and rolled back. Getting up with a jump, the once confident goggles-wearing boy groaned. Taking a crouched stance with his left fist forward and the right covering his right cheek showed he got serious. Ranma took a stance of his own, calmly bringing a palm up while keeping the other at his waist's level. It was a simple defensive stance, but effective when facing opponents who took an aggressive initiative or were full of dirty tricks.

Charging yet again, the blond threw two hard punches that Ranma swatted aside. Swiftly, the blond jumped up and swung a leg at the martial artist's head, trying to slam his ankle against his face. Once again, speed was the pigtail wearing boy's forte. In a flash, he dashed back and avoided the strike, before dashing forward once again to strike the falling blond. Gritting his teeth at the incoming attack, the fox boy cursed himself for promising not to play dirty. But just as he was about to get hit, a wooden sword stopped cut Ranma's path and nearly smacked him on the wrist.

Jumping back, the black-haired boy glared at a pompadour-wearing swordsman, "Kuno, now's not the- What's wrong with your hair!?" he had to ask that when seeing the kendo club captain with melted red candy stuck to his scalp, giving him a crimson cowlick.

"Saotome, our battle for Akane-san's hand can wait. I shall regain my honor and kill this mongrel!" he aimed his sword at the trickster, who just grinned widely.

"Had fun?" the blond asked cockily.

"Insolent fool!" Kuno growled, "I told you, this school has no need for troublemakers who like you and Saotome can't wear the uniform as it's instructed."

"And I asked what happened if I don't care about silly rules." The blond growled.

"Like I said, your family must have been informed and told you so." Kuno growled back, "If they can't do such a task, I pity whatever mother raised anyone like you."

Clenching his fists, the blond got into his stance, "Oi girly hair, our fight can wait!" he told Ranma, "I'm going to teach this guy another lesson!"

Kuno brought up his sword, "Here there's only justice so long as I, the Blue-" that was as far as he got before the trickster punched him so hard he crashed against a wall. Ranma and Akane were amazed at the sheer brute force the blond had, while a faucet Kuno smashed into broke. As the water shot out, washing off the candy on his hair and spraying everywhere, Naruto turned to his other opponent.

"Don't talk about shit you don't know about..." he growled before turning to Ranma, bringing up his fists, "Alright, girly hair, now it's time to- Where's he?"

Looking all around, he found no hair or hide of the boy, because he had turned into Ranko, the red-haired beauty. Currently, she was hiding on a tree to keep her secret from being revealed. Akane for her part tried to think of an excuse to tell the blond while the petite and more voluptuous redhead started to make her way to try to find some hot water. But there was a catch...

"Alright, I'll need an excuse so he doesn't think I just ran off. If I can just..." she then stared confused at the blond, "Is he... sniffing?"

Doing so like a beast, the blue-eyed teen turned from left to right, "There's that odd scent, but it smells like girly-hair is... girlier?" scratching his head, he kept following the scent before looking up, "Huh?"

"Dammit!" Ranko yelped, stepping on a branch too weak to hold her before falling down when it broke.

Staring at her in astonishment, the blond could only say, "Wait, are you a kitsune too?" he asked, pointing at himself.

"Kitsune?" Akane and Ranko asked.

"Ugh, this is gonna be a pain in the ass..." he growled while the girls just felt more confused. He noted Kuno trying to stir himself into consciousness, so he turned to the two, "Let's leave. You can explain everything later." Then he grinned, "We can finish our fight once all's said and done. Fight me however you want, I can't wait to see what else you can do."

And with yet another cloud of smoke, he left the two girls to try to figure what had just happened. Once the students managed to get out of the traps, classes were suspended. An annoyed Nabiki accompanied them home, disappointed that she missed some payments but keeping tabs on that to make the debtors squirm if they thought they could run. She hadn't been safe either, the pink spots on her clothes and body said so.

"You two didn't even get a name?" she asked the engaged duo.

"I wish I had landed a hit on him." Akane grunted.

"Whoever he was, he sure got the last laugh." Ranko pointed out, "He'll surely be kicked out of school for that, just like he wanted. And even if he kept going, he'd have us to mess with."

"For such a sneaky guy, he sure is easygoing." Nabiki commented, before humming, "Perhaps with the proper clothing and a little charm, he could join me..."

"What're you whispering?" A worried Akane asked.

"Oi, you're thinking of using the guy for your easy money scams, aren't you?" Ranko accused the brunette.

Casually shrugging, the broker replied with, "Who? Little me? Please, you should know you need proof before any baseless finger-pointing."

"You know, I wish you meet him and have all your plans blow right on your face." Ranko growled at her, having already dealt with the brunette's schemes.

"Oh come on, can't you take it easy?" the middle Tendo sister asked coyly, "After all, he could be trying to steal Akane from you if all he said about finding her plain self as cute gives any pointers."

"I'm not plain!" the blue-haired girl exclaimed irritated.

Nabiki smiled teasingly at her sister, "You may enjoy it, some guys like girls who are cute in a simple way like you."

"I'd enjoy that second round, honestly." Ranko said with her arms crossed, looking at some bruises, "All that talk about being a kitsune may be real if he packs this kind of punch."

"Who knows? But he's made things interesting." Nabiki commented, "Just rest and figure things out when you can."

"Yeah, I guess I should try to think of a way to fight around him..." Ranko slowly stopped when noticing some noise, "Is that our old men?"

The three raced to their home to hear some yelling coming from the living room, where their parents were talking with a balding man in white robes.

"Y-You can't be serious!" shouted Ranma's father, his glasses sliding down to the bridge of his nose.

The balding man shook his head, "I'm afraid you forgot our pact." He stared sternly at them, "You stole a scroll from that thief to summon me, to deal with him. After all his indecent crimes, I couldn't stand still. But you made a deal with me. Both of you had to, for trying to use the teachings in that scroll is punishable for the undeserving with death."

Akane and Nabiki's father chuckled sheepishly, "B-But we've trained really hard, and Genma's son is an extraordinary example of manliness. Surely, if you let him try to earn those teachings..."

"No." the white-robed man said bluntly.

Genma chortled nervously, "P-Please, Sarutobi-san! You should really see what my boy is capable of! None are more deserving of such teachings than him, I assure-"

"The old fart said no, gramps." All three girls recognized the voice and walked in to see, "Huh? Girly hair, Plain Panties, and... Who're you?" the blond aimed a finger at them before lowering it when getting to Nabiki who, to her credit, kept her cool despite having her clothes and hair ruined by his prank.

"You know each other!?" the parents and daughters asked.

"Naruto, what did you do?" the elder asked with a glare that made the blond flinch.

"Stupid chief, I told you I wasn't going to be in that place if someone acted like a jackass..." the boy grumbled and lied on his side, prompting his head up with an arm, "After a samurai wannabe mentioned things he had no idea about, I had to teach him a lesson."

Sighing deeply, the elder turned to the two martial arts teachers, "And this is why I need you two to look over Naruto as proper punishment for attempting to use that scroll's powers." He glared at the boy, getting him to freeze under his gaze, "He is an exceptional child, full of potential. While he remains here, he'll no doubt get into trouble, but it'll be for a good reason."

"We understand, but still, how can we even control such a being...?" the mustached man asked uneasily.

"Tch, it's not like I'd kill you." Naruto huffed, irked a bit, "All I'm here to do is kick ass..." he casually started to pick his ear, before blowing the wax off his pinky finger.

"Hey old man, explain, please." Ranko told her father, who looked away.

"It's a long story... But, as you may have heard, we owe Sarutobi-san for helping us seal away a great evil..." Genma started.

His friend continued, "Actually, we succumbed to temptation and tried to learn martial arts only allowed to those judged by beings like him."

"Anyone he'd deem worthy would have to be beyond exceptional, which is part of the reason I trained you, Ranma, to do what I couldn't..." Genma continued.

"But..." Soun didn't like where he was headed, but he had no option, "It seems that to make up for our sin, begging for our lives was not enough."

"You thought you could beg this old monkey for your life?" Naruto, as he was identified, asked with a snicker, "Hah, I've been trying to beat the sack of bones for ages and still can't scratch him! And you two aren't the kind of people I'd have trouble beating!"

"You little..." Genma growled, but Naruto sat up, smiling cockily.

"I said what I'm sure of, if we fought, me showing you what I can do would make it too easy." The blond then let his head fall back to look at the three girls upside down, "Though if the girls here are this cute, I may think about it..."

"That's it." Akane said as she grabbed the table, ready to smash him with it only for her father and future father-in-law to stop her.

"No, don't! He's our guest, and if he doesn't fulfill his mission, we're dead!" Soun cried.

Sarutobi sighed, "Soun, Genma, I am entrusting Naruto to you not to spoil him, but to guide him too." He stood up, "As you can see, his thoughts about humans is something he won't hide. But he had a mission, one he can't and won't refuse. That is why, despite how he'll act, he has no choice but to remain here."

"What's that mission, then?" Ranko asked, intrigued.

"Kicking evil spirits out of this town." Naruto replied with a smirk, "Maybe I should start with you. That odd scent of yours is unnatural."

She smirked back, "If you want that second round, say so."

"Enough!" Sarutobi shouted, getting the room to freeze, "Naruto, you will live here. I suggest you learn to get along with them, for no other place will take you in with your attitude."

Sadly, the man had a point, and the blond showed his understanding with an, "Urgh..."

"I'll be leaving. Make sure he doesn't get in too much trouble." Sarutobi said, waving off.

"Wait!" everyone else shouted, but he had already left in a cloud of smoke.

"So..." Naruto started, leaning against a wall, "What's up for lunch?"

XXXXXX

And that's my rap!

Needless to say, this is made to change things up in the Ranmaverse and focus more on fights than slapstick involving Akane or some equivalent punching Ranma. Real talk, I'm indifferent to Akane now. After seeing the anime's first episodes, I can see her potential. Of course, I dislike how she grew to abuse the tsundere trope.

But, like I said, I'm indifferent now to her. I actually find her cute. Granted, I think she'd be better put in her place by an alpha male. And I'm not ashamed to admit that, as the male I am, I have fantasized with having sexy girls hugging my legs as I sit on a throne. Not like I'd go to that extreme, but hey, Naruto's standing up to her.

Plot-wise, things will escalate and get more and more ridiculous when characters from the Narutoverse come as the spirits Naruto has to deal with. Pairing-wise, you know me. I'll pair Naruto with whoever I feel like putting him with from the Ranmaverse, perhaps pair Ranma with girls of the Narutoverse. We'll see.

I am inclined to pair Akane with Naruto - do NOT leave just yet, Akane-haters - so he can drive her mad. Yes, Naruto will be here to tease and prank her. Yes, Akane will be the target of his antics. Or maybe I could go a dark path like many of you smut-obsessed people want and make her loyal to his d- Nah, I'm not that messed up.

Or am I?

Swordslinger out!