Knock-knock-knock

Mama glared at the back door with a pursed lip and a fist on her hip. Just because the front door said 'Closed', that didn't mean anyone could get service at the back door of a restaurant. Who was bothering her at the crack of dawn, anyway?

Fine, whatever. Mama put down her rolling pin and opened the back door.

The young woman behind the door flinched, whereas Mama raised an eyebrow. Holy smokes, the early bird was well-dressed; she wore a black suit and a skirt that wouldn't look out of place in a board meeting. Her glasses topped off the academical air, although her blue eyes flickered up and down between Mama and the pavement. Her hair, long and bluish-silver, was as straight and smooth as someone coming out of the hairdresser's. That all said, Mama thought the white horn on the side of her head and the skulls on her belt and gauntlets were a tad unnerving.

Mama raised an eyebrow. What would an occultist businesswoman want with a cook? "Uh, can I help you?"

The woman gulped. "Um, I, uh, c-could I... use... your k-kitchen, please...?"

For a woman so well presented, she didn't have the speaking manner of a presenter. "Why?"

"I'm..." she took a breath, "I'm very... hungry..." another breath, "and I w-want to make something to eat, please..."

Mama had met with weirder. Even so, people who asked such things usually dress more shabbily. "Sorry but no. You can come in when we open, though—"

"Please!" the woman begged with newfound clarity, bowing and clasping her hands together. "I promise I'll clean up after! I'll be done before you need to open! I won't get in your way, just please..."

Mama sighed. "I appreciate your thoughtfulness," which was hardly unique with that request, "but I can't let just anyone use the kitchen willy-nilly. It gets—"

"GNGH!" The woman suddenly seized her stomach as she doubled over and her knees hit the pavement.

Okay, that was due cause to worry. "Hey, are you okay?!" asked Mama.

Grrr... went the woman's stomach.

Well that explained it all.

The woman kept her head down. Mama couldn't blame her. "... I'm sorry..."

"Here you go!" said Mama with cheer as she slid her guest a steaming plate of pancakes, topped generously with maple syrup, ice cream, and sliced banana.

Unsurprisingly, the silver/blue/whatever-haired woman salivated as the sweet vapour rose from the stack. "Oh thank you so much...!" Surprisingly, she didn't dig into it like a paper shredder; she cut out little bits at a time and ate them with grace and dignity. Such ladylike manners!

"Hey, c'mon, let loose a little." Mama sat down next to her. "What's your name, by the way?"

The woman covered her mouth with her hand as she swallowed and then spoke. "It's Rei. Rei Ryghts."

"And you have a family name! Now that's as rare as a Metal Slime!" Mama exclaimed. "So what brings a perfectly respectable woman like you to the back of 'Like Mama Made It'? You look like someone who could afford a meal."

"Ah, that. W-Well..." Rei lowered her cutlery. "I know I look well-off but the truth is... I'm homeless. Normally, I get by with scraps and garbage and leftovers but..." She curled her fingers against the table. "I built up my courage to ask if I could use your kitchen."

"Oh honey..." Mama placed a hand on Rei's shoulder. "That's no way to eat. And you're still so gorgeous!"

Rei's head zipped around, keeping Mama from looking at her face (probably blushing, no doubt). "W-W-W-W-Well... Y-Your food is delicious...! I'm so thankful...! I can't thank you enough, really..."

Mama snorted. "The least I can do for someone starving. Geez, how did someone like you end up on the streets?"

"I'd... rather not talk about it."

"Ah, a secret? Alright. We've all got those." She placed a hand on Rei's shoulder. "Well, keep this in mind; if you ever need a place to stay, or something to eat, then my door is wide open for you whenever you need it."

"O-Oh, I couldn't! You have paying customers and I couldn't impose—"

"Don't worry about it! I've always got supplies to spare." Mama got up again and walked to the kitchen. "You're not saying you're the sort to eat me into a decline, are you?"

"N-No, never!"

"Then we're good!" Mama flashed Rei a smile. "Perhaps I could take you on as a cook, if you're so confident in cooking for yourself. Up for it?"

"Uh-ah-eh..." Rei hung her head once more. "No, I... I have low standards... I'll eat anything..."

Mama sighed. "Sweetie, I've taken in wet puppies happier than you. Just sit tight and enjoy your breakfast, alright?"

Rei nodded. "Thank you."

"It's my pleasure, sweetie."

Rei cut off another slice of her pancake staff and ate it neatly. It was still the best thing she'd ever eaten in her life.

"Take care now!" said Mama as Rei left through the back door. Rei smiled and waved back.

With a sigh of contentment, Rei rubbed her stomach. She couldn't remember the last time she had such a complete and extravagant breakfast, let alone a breakfast cooked for her. Actually, this could very have been the first time someone cooked for her.

It didn't even end with the breakfast. Rei opened up the brown paper bag she carried and took out a thick sandwich covered in tin foil. Mama even gave her a roast chicken sandwich for lunch! There was also a juice box but that didn't have the same enticing aroma that filled Rei's mouth to dangerous levels of drool.

But this was her lunch. She had to resist the temptation to shred the foil for a few hours. Only then could she dig in like there was no tomorrow, and Rei knew how it felt to feel there was no tomorrow to be had.

"Hey! Whatcha got there?" asked a chipper voice over her shoulder.

"GYAH!" Rei spun around so quickly that she nearly tripped over.

Startled as she was, Rei immediately acted defensively towards her 'aggressor', who actually looked more casual than aggressive. The front of her long hair, coloured a lilac a bit lighter than her eyes, had a thick round white hairclip with a d-pad in it. Even though the morning was kind of chilly, she wore astoundingly short indigo shorts and her white and teal sweater left much of her shoulders bare, even if it was made of wool. Perhaps her plum leggings were warm enough for her?

No time to ponder that question; the passer-by caught the scent of her lunch. She was persistent in leaning forward to capture more of it, even as Rei shoved the wrapped meal back in its bag. "That smells scrumptious! Wanna share?"

"Wh—No!" Rei held the bag close to her chest. "I'm sorry but this is my lunch!"

"Lunch? But it's only like 7."

"I'm saving it!"

"You can get something else later!"

Rei's lip quivered, despite trying to restrain herself. "I can't..."

The joviality evaporated from the stranger's face. "Ohh..." With respect to Rei's boundaries (shown a bit later rather than sooner), she leaned back. "Sorry about that. Never mind."

Rei couldn't meet her face, although it was still too awkward for her to leave. She held the bag close to her chest.

The stranger cleared her throat before extending a hand to Rei. "We kind of got off on a rough start, didn't we? My name's Umbriel. What's yours?"

Rei's gaze flickered from the hand to Umbriel's eyes. She wasn't in the mood to take her hand. "Rei. Rei Ryghts—"

Hold on.

Umbriel?

The Umbriel?

"Y-Y-You're the Umbriel, g-goddess of P-Planeptune?!" Rei shrieked.

"Hey, keep it down!" urged Umbriel with a hushed whisper. "Just shush! I don't even like being called a goddess anyway, even if it's kinda true! Just 'CPU' is fine!"

"Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no ohhhhhh...!" The CPU of the nation was talking to her of all people! Her, a homeless street rat! Rei would've clasped her head if she wasn't holding her lunch bag (and she didn't entirely trust Umbriel to not take it).

Oh no! Would she be arrested for thinking poorly of the ruler? Who knows what cruelties a CPU was capable of? She didn't want to find out! Somebody save herrrrrrrr!

"C-Chill out already...!" Umbriel had to hold back a snigger. "Jeez, Histoire's more lax than you!"

"Huh?" Why was a CPU so friendly with her? W-Was this some kind of trick?

Umbriel placed her hands on her hips. "Hm. Tell you what, you look like you're about to fall over and shatter. What say you and I hang out for the day?"

Rei's eyes widened.

"And I just mean hang out!" Umbriel pressed, holding out her hands in a sorta cool-your-jets kinda way. "Just walk around Planeptune, talk about ourselves, take a load off and relax. Whaddya think?"

Despite the friendly demeanour, Rei was still tense. "Why me...?"

Umbriel smiled. "You make me laugh."

As she was the nervous sort, Rei would have made any excuse to not take Umbriel up on her offer. That is, if she had one. Someone to visit? No, Rei had no friends. Or family, for that matter. Something urgent to do? No, Rei was never involved in anything important. Nor did she have anything that needed her to look after it.

So Rei ended up trailing behind Umbriel as they walked around the city.

"Y'know," started the CPU, "sometimes I feel like this nation isn't my responsibility."

Rei lifted her head to the CPU. "I'm sorry?"

"Well, I mean..." Umbriel scratched the back of her head. "Everything just works here. It's self-sufficient, the citizens are great, and the systems we have... they just work. It all flows. If anything screws up, I feel more like I'm hitting a TV to fix it rather than acting like a guardian goddess. Y'know what I mean?"

No, Rei did not know what she meant. She didn't want to think about it, either; it hurt too much. "Is that why you're out here rather than in the Basilicom?"

"Yeah, nah, a bit of both. The Basilicom's in good hands so I like to come out every now and again. Meet the people I'm protecting, patrol for hooligans and dastardly villains, that sorta thing. The 'nah' was because I just like being out and about. Walking's fun."

"O-Oh... I guess it is..." Wasn't that a bit irresponsible? By Rei's opinion, a CPU's work was never done.

"Hey, what are you trailing so far behind for anyway? Come here, next to me."

Rei came to a stop, even as she knew this was the exact opposite of what she was asked to do. "A-Are you sure?"

"No, I specifically asked you so that you'd keep away. Of course I'm sure! C'mere!" Umbriel paced to Rei's side and pulled her in by her shoulder, afterwards giving it a few playful pats. "See? We fit together like puzzle pieces!"

"Aheheheheh..." Rei had to force out that chuckle. Even she couldn't believe how pathetically nervous it sounded.

Umbriel then leaned back. "Hold on, am I being too forward?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, I'm sorry; I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable or anything. If I'm intruding on your personal space, I'm really sorry. You're entitled to it! You should feel comfortable! I shouldn't be so pushy."

"Oh no no no no no!" Rei denied. "That's not it at all! I like company! It's just I... I'm not good with company. A-As you can see."

"Pfft! Now that's a load of baloney," said Umbriel. "So what if you're nervous and don't talk a lot? That's no reason to exclude you. If you like being talked to, that's fine. Again, whatever makes you comfortable is fine by me."

A small smile began to squirm its way onto Rei's face. "I'd be fine with that, thank you..."

"Atta girl." Umbriel patted her shoulder as they began walking again. "So do you have a story or would you rather not share?"

Rei bit her lip. "I-It's something I'd like to keep to myself..."

"Gotcha." Umbriel winked. "Keep it to yourself. Whatever makes ya comfy."

Rei felt a bit more comfortable for that.

A few hours went by as the 'Planeptour' (as Umbriel called it) took the pair to and fro across the city. Not the whole landmass, goodness no; there were monsters outside the city. As fun as the tour was, their legs had their limits. They agreed to have a break and some morning tea at a noodle/burger shop.

"I'll sit outside any day of the week," said Umbriel as she and Rei relaxed at one of the outside tables, under the shade of the umbrella sticking through the middle of it.

"I'm more of an indoor person," Rei responded. "It'd be much cooler in there."

"Getting hot in that suit of yours?"

"I just tend to get hot easily. But the walking around doesn't help."

"Not gonna argue with that," said Umbriel, tugging at her choker. "Much nicer day than I thought it'd be."

Rei smiled. "A perfect day for a walk, then."

"Darn tootin'. And a perfect day for Planeptune trivia, too." Umbriel leaned forward. "Seriously! Even my friends couldn't answer my awesome Planeptune Quiz half as well as you did!"

"I-I have a... lot of time on my hands. I've been around a lot of Planeptune."

"Alright, alright. So are you, like, a drifter or something?"

Rei bristled. "Um..."

"Not intending to pry, of course. If it helps, I think it's cool to be a drifter."

"R-Really...?"

"Yeah! Some peeps think it's dangerous and... well, it is. But think of the adventure! The thrill! And also all the places you go and people you meet! Better than being stuck in an office all day." Umbriel sighed. "I wish I could just go out and adventu—"

"I don't go to dungeons," Rei cut in. "I can't... fight. I haven't left the city in a while."

"So?"

Rei blinked. "What do you mean, 'so'?"

Umbriel stood up and cast her arm out, gesturing to the tall buildings and infrastructure that seemed to spread out over the horizon. "Look at this place! Isn't it massive? It's really big. There's always something to do! Something to see! Always something new! Isn't walking around this place an adventure on its own?"

"... Not really, no."

Umbriel's arm went limp. "Eh?"

Rei turned her head away. "Planeptune hasn't really advanced much. The people don't change. The culture's the same. As are the buildings. There's not... much... here. And I've seen it all. Several times."

Umbriel sat back down. She looked at Rei slightly differently now, like she was a game to be played. Something to be overcome. "Well, I have something to say about that," she started, holding up her index finger.

Rei froze a bit. Then she realised it was only 'a bit'. It wasn't even the abnormal sort of nervousness this time around from external circumstances; it was her timid nature and only that. Umbriel was someone she felt (nearly) comfortable around. She didn't expect the CPU to savage her but, rather, just talk to her like a regular person.

"... Actually, I don't." Umbriel started stroking her chin. "Now I can't help but think you have a point."

THUMP!

The two didn't react as both their chairs and their table jumped slightly in the air.

THUMP!

A colossal robot perhaps ten metres tall stood next to their table, blocking the sun with its tremendous torso. Its dark brown legs, wide at the bottom and narrowing as they went up, were the width of car doors. At its heels and on either side of its feet were spiked pistons, possibly meant to secure it in place when firing heavy weaponry. Its green and brown torso resembled a wingless fighter jet with a hollow nose. Its black head looked down at them with bright yellow eyes.

"Hᴇʀᴇ ᴀʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏʀᴅᴇʀs," it said as it placed two bowls of noodles on the table. Rei was given a rather small olive green bowl topped with small cuts of salmon. In front of Umbriel was a tremendous marble brown bowl with a thick sauce draping over the sides over a mountain of beef, chicken, fish, mushroom, and whatever else that couldn't be seen, including the noodles that one might have forgotten were there swimming at the bottom of the gargantuan dish. "Wɪʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴇʟsᴇ?"

Umbriel glanced at the robot's hands. "Uh, sorry but where are my dumplings?"

The robot's eyes suddenly glowed with a burning red. "I ᴋɴᴇᴡ ᴛʜᴇʏ ꜰᴏʀɢᴏᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ..." It stopped growling as its eyes turned yellow again. "I'ᴍ sᴏ sᴏʀʀʏ. I sʜᴀʟʟ ɢᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴜᴍᴘʟɪɴɢs ᴀᴛ ᴏɴᴄᴇ." It turned around and, with one THUMP after another, returned to inside the restaurant. "Bʏ ᴀɴʏ ᴍᴇᴀɴs ɴᴇᴄᴇssᴀʀʏ..."

Umbriel looked back at Rei and smiled. She slid her hands under her bowl and lifted it up. "A toast, then, to meeting and eating and all that jazz. To new buddies and fine dining."

Rei blinked. She looked at her own bowl. She then looked at Umbriel's. She then looked at Umbriel herself. "Wait, a toast with our bowls?"

"Do you have a glass with you?"

"No but—"

"Bowls it is, then! Chop chop!"

Rei tapped the side of her bowl with her finger. A moment passed before she smiled softly and lifted up her own bowl. "Cheers."

The two of them tapped their bowls together, which made the top quarter of Umbriel's meat mountain monstrosity avalanche down to Rei's modest bowl and splash onto her suit.

"Ah!" Rei gasped as she snapped back into her chair, dropping her bowl in the process. Fortunately, it landed rightly and nothing else of value was lost.

"Oh jeez I'm so sorry!" Umbriel apologised quickly as she snatched up a serviette, stood up, and walked over to Rei's side. "Lemme just..."

"No, no, d-don't worry!" Rei urged as she guarded herself from Umbriel's serviette. "I can clean myself." As if to demonstrate her point, Rei plucked a serviette of her own and wiped her clothes. Of course the stains wouldn't come out; the clothes would need a wash. That'd be a nice change of pace for them, at least.

Umbriel pursed her lips. "Well, if you say so." The CPU sat back down. "Do you have a washing machine or something?"

"No, I..." Rei found herself cut off by the sight of a woman striding towards them from behind Umbriel, whose back of her head bore the wrath of the woman's red-eyed glare. Her hair had two braids wrapping around the back of her head, which were kept in place with two black hairsticks. Along with a formal teal dress meant for business, she wore black tights and black boots that reached her knees. Actually, the boots quite resembled a knight's legwear in away. "N-No I don't..."

"Tch. Bummer." Umbriel picked up her fork and spun it in her hand. "I'm really sorry. And that's such a cool suit too—"

"Umbriel," the woman spoke.

Umbriel stopped immediately. Rei saw a lot of emotions flash through her eyes in that one moment; surprise, exasperation, fatigue, and irritation to start. Those were just the most obvious ones, too. She sighed quietly before she turned around in her seat with all the energy of a sloth. "Hey Sonya."

Sonya? The CPU of Lastation? Why was she here? And why did she look as scary and mean as Rei first thought Umbriel would be like?

Sonya crossed her arms in a way that made Rei want to hide behind Umbriel's bowl. "Why are you not at your Basilicom as you should be?"

Umbriel shrugged. "I wanted to go for a walk. You can't stay inside all day. Fresh air, exercise, and a change of scenery are good for mental health."

"I'd accept that excuse if you were getting your fresh air, exercise, and scenery from visiting sites of importance." Sonya's eyes narrowed. "But even then, you've forgotten our meeting. Which was half an hour ago."

"I didn't forget; you did. One of the Lowee ambassadors said they couldn't make it today so I rescheduled with Histoire. I sent a message to you. And your Oracle, just in case."

"I don't 'forget' like you do." The dark CPU's eyes narrowed. "The ambassador said it was their daughter's birthday."

"Yep."

"And you just rolled over for that?"

Umbriel tapped her finger on the table, looking back at her bowl with longing. "Of course. Family time is important. Children need regular contact and love from their parents. Vice versa, too. I know I'd go mad if I didn't get to play with Neptune—Oh!" Umbriel snapped her fingers and pointed at Rei. "Remind me to show you baby photos!"

Rei felt quite a bit too paralysed and put-on-the-spot to verbalise a 'yes' so she just nodded.

"Ahem," Sonya cleared her throat. "When I am told that there is a meeting I must attend and I am given a very clear time and place, I expect those to be set in stone, not changed on a whim."

Umbriel rolled her eyes. "I told you, it wasn't on a whim. Someone said they couldn't come so we had to change for when everyone was available. I sent you the message two days ago; you've had plenty of notice."

"We are CPUs, Umbriel. CPUs are steadfast. CPUs are the pillars that the lost turn to for direction. CPUs are not the sort to shuffle entire schedules because one person complains."

"Ugh..." Umbriel leaned her head back over the backrest of her chair to look at Sonya upside down. "Have you ever thought you might be taking this a bit too seriously? It's not like the world's going to end because the meeting is delayed by one day. You didn't have to come all this way just to make a point."

"I feel otherwise." Sonya lifted her hand up against the back of Umbriel's head and forced it upright. "All eyes focus on the CPUs, the goddesses of Gamindustri. If you make a mistake, then people will watch me because they think I too will make a mistake. That is not something I can tolerate."

Umbriel's finger drummed repeatedly against the table as she refused to look back at Sonya.

Rei gulped slightly. "E-Excuse me..."

"What good is an imperfect goddess? We are meant to be relied on in times of need. If the populace see us for our failures, how are they to trust us? Even the smallest error can jeopardise eons of rule. A goddess cannot be seen as weak, as a target. A goddess, therefore, cannot compromise or weaken herself for the sake of those that impede progress."

"Excuse me, Lady Son—"

"And a goddess must certainly not be the one to impede progress. It still baffles me that you shunt work onto your staff while you go out and play. It's a small wonder the rest of the world sees you as a child to shake a rattle in front of."

"Lady Sonya!"

Sonya finally stopped talking down to Umbriel. Her blood-red eyes shifted to the vagrant. "Is this important?"

Now that the CPU was looking at her, and with such a terrifying gaze at that, Rei felt her knees go weak. More than anything, she just wanted to sit back down and look away and pretend nothing ever happened. She took a calming breath through her nose... "You're wrong. Lady Umbriel is a-amazing. A-And we're trying to have lunch. Please don't ruin the mood. L-Like Umbriel said—"

Sonya held up a flat hand, of course telling her to 'stop'. Not that she waited long to start speaking herself. "I don't know who you are." Her signal was one she expected to be obeyed rather than one she waited for an answer to.

"I'm Rei. Rei Ryghts."

"I never asked for your name. You're unimportant. This is official CPU business. It doesn't concern you."

The cold callousness thrown her way made Rei want to cry. "B-But she's m-my friend and you're b-bothering—"

"I don't care," spat the CPU, "what you think. I order you to be quiet."

Rei bit her lip. She wanted to look away from those angry eyes. She wanted to say sorry, she wanted to give Sonya some kind of gift; she just wanted her to stop looking at her like that... But Rei, even as her eyes threatened to water and her voice began to crack, fought that urge. Placing her hands on the table, she stood up and forced herself to tearfully look Sonya in the eye and speak. "N-No... I w-won't... Y-You can leave... now..."

Sonya's eyes flared as she drew her sword. "I will not be ord—"

A clang! shot through the air as Sonya's sword was batted from her hand and sent flying across the street. Umbriel stood in front of Rei, up on her feet with her own sword in the blink of an eye.

Umbriel took a step closer to Sonya as she made her weapon disappear in a burst of blue pixels. "Sonya," she began, her voice low, "I have no qualms with how you run your nation. I will let slide any slights you make against me or my own nation. But, I will have you know, I am not forgiving of anyone who threatens my friends, my citizens, or anyone else."

Such remarks hardly calmed Sonya. "You raise a sword to a CPU. Do you not know the ramifications of this? Again you act blindly, without judgement or regard for how this will affect your Shares—"

"The people give their faith as they see fit," Umbriel cut in. "Their security and happiness are what matter to me, not what they give me for it. If they have faith in me, great. If they don't, it hardly matters. This is a thankless job. How weird, then, that my Shares are neck and neck with yours, since my approach is lax whereas yours is strict and iron-fisted."

"My public image is supreme," Sonya countered. "It's hardly my fault the sheep are drawn to your slothfulness."

"They are drawn to my care, Sonya, and driven away by your ruthlessness. Rather than barge into my nation just to insult me—which is an incredible waste of time for your busy schedule, by the way—you might want to consider easing your image to the public at large."

Sonya glared at Umbriel. Her brow furrowed and her nostrils flared in a show of strength, which looked impressive to a passer-by as Sonya was taller than the other. Yet Umbriel's face remained passive, unflinching, unchanging. They stared at each other for moments more until the CPU of Lastation closed her eyes and growled. "You're a failure of a CPU and your daughter will drive your nation into the ground." With a rough pivot on her heel, Sonya paced away.

Umbriel sat back down. "Ugh..." She propped an elbow onto the table and held her head with her hand, massaging her face with its fingers. "Psychopathic bitch…"

Rei held her tongue. That was rather heavy, after all; Umbriel wouldn't want more bothers until she had a chance to calm down.

But then the purple-haired CPU looked at Rei, smiling slightly. "You okay?"

"Huh? Uh, yes. I… wasn't expecting that." Wait, she was making this about herself. That's not cool. "Are you okay?"

"I have to deal with that all the time. Do you?"

Rei had to admit, with a shake of her head, that she didn't.

"Thought so. Thanks for worrying about me all the same but I'm more worried about you. I'll bet on that if it comes to it."

"I don't really have anything to bet…"

"Sure you do. You have a rocking suit and snappy glasses. Those gauntlet things, too."

"I-I'm not a gambling woman!" Rei hugged herself for safety. Those were her only clothes, after all. "A-And there's no need to make a bet! I believe you!"

"Heh. I always win." The CPU's gaze, aimed at Rei, got a bit softer. She lifted up her other elbow and supported her head with both hands. "You wanna know something?"

Rei looked hastily from side to side. "Uh… sh-should I?"

"I think you should." Umbriel's smile got a bit wider. "That was the first time anyone's stood up for me."

"O-Oh." Well, she got worried over nothing. "… Really?"

"Yeah. Looking out for yourself is just kind of a thing you're expected to do as a CPU. I don't believe that, personally; friends are important to everyone. It's alright to believe you're awesome. You just can't tell anyone that because they'll think you're an egotistical blowhard. Friends saying you're awesome are much more believable."

"Well... that does make sense, if you say so."

"Now let's eat up!" Umbriel snatched up her fork. "Morning tea's getting cold."

Oh yeah, that was a thing. As was Rei's stained suit…

"Nnnnnnngh…!" Umbriel stretched her arms so far that Rei got a bit worried for her. "Man, we were sitting there for ages."

"I'm just surprised you finished your bowl faster than I did," said Rei.

Umbriel turned and gave Rei a thumbs-up and a wide, sparkling smile. "Us Planeptune CPUs have black hole stomachs. Don't you forget it."

Rei smiled. "I don't think I will."

"Good meal, though, huh?"

"Yes, absolutely. I'd like to go back someday, if I can."

"Leave it to me. I'm up for another date with you anytime."

Rei bit her lip.

"But seriously…" Umbriel turned around to face Rei with an unusual expression, at least from what Rei knew of her. She was smiling, she looked good-natured and in a good mood as always, yet… Umbriel was like that before but something about this felt intrinsically different. Something personal for Rei alone rather than strangers Umbriel shares unconditional kindness with. "That was a great day. Thanks for joining me."

Rei felt her face nearly blush again, although not out of embarrassment this time. There was something about Umbriel's unabashed gratefulness that made her feel, of all things, guilty. "I… I should be the one thanking you. Nobody gives someone like me the time of day and yet… yet a CPU comes by at random and sweeps me off my feet and we have the best day out ever… It feels ill-deserved… E-Especially when Sonya—L-Lady Sonya—ruined the noodles…"

"She didn't ruin anything. Not for a lack of trying, mind you, but still. We had tonnes of fun. The noodles were great. Especially when you stepped to Sonya for me. That was the bravest thing I had ever seen."

"B-But I still needed you to save me…"

"Well it's brave when a dog charges a tank. Some things can't be helped." Umbriel placed a hand on Rei's shoulder. "Missy, listen to me; you were brave because you did something you had no faith would work in the end. Sonya talked down to me and she wasn't brave because she thinks the world owes her everything. But you? You think less of yourself than you should, she's scary as heck, and you still told her off. The Basilicom needs more people like you."

Rei wanted to protest. Somehow, there was something right in what Umbriel said but it shouldn't be said to her. Anyone else would do; just not Rei. But Umbriel looked at her with such warmth and the words evaporated.

"That said, I better be off. You should come by sometime. I reckon Histoire would love to meet you." Umbriel gave her a small wave. "See ya, Rei."

"O-Oh, b-bye…"

Still with that unfading smile, Umbriel turned and walked away. Of course she did; she was the CPU of one quarter of the world. Who knew what things she needed to do? Who knew who she needed to meet with? Meetings, projects, budgets, infrastructure… And yet, someone like that found her agreeable. Someone like that told her 'Hey, maybe you can come visit the most important building in the nation so we can chit chat with tea and biscuits'. Heck, Rei could go right now. She had nothing to do.

... Well, why not?

Why wasn't Rei following her right now? She had no other friends. She had no obligations, or investments, or assets to maintain. She literally had nothing better to do than follow Umbriel.

Rei couldn't suppress her smile. She had a friend! Someone who actually valued her and defended her! She actually (maybe) appreciated her! Maybe if Rei asked, she could help around the Basilicom. That'd be wonderful to be an appreciated asset of the CPU.

Rei could...!

Rei...

... Rei didn't deserve it. Any of it.

At the end of the day, Umbriel knew nothing of Rei. Rei knew little of Umbriel but what she saw made her put her faith in the CPU. If Umbriel knew Rei, that would never be reciprocated.

The bespectacled vagrant opened up her brown paper back. She took out the sandwich inside and peeled away the foil. Still as fresh and good-smelling as before. It was lunch time anyway; Rei sunk her teeth in it and pulled.

It tasted amazing. Not that it would help with everything. But it helped for just now. That was good enough.

So a while ago, Isaki/men-don't-scream gifted the world with his art, something he is rather apt to do. This while, however, was home to a certain someone: Umbriel, the OC mother of Neptune, who has a bloody lot of fanart for an Neptunia OC. That's actually not too surprising, given the artist in question, and it's by all accounts a good thing. Proud of ya, buddy.

This story was one that stuck in my head for a good while, so I wrote it up on my phone during my breaks at work. The idea of Rei and Umbriel meeting by random and being good friends in a rather tropey fashion eventually sunk its fangs into me. What can I say? I too have a soft spot for the bespectacled shrinking hypocrite.
But I wanted to try something a bit different with her; whereas folks like to focus on the pitiful villain side of her, I wanted to show her as an agent of change who uses the goodness in her for the better even though she's burdened with a past of terrible mistakes. Rather than circle the Rei Ryghts drain, I wanted to make a hero out of her.

Thanks to Xeniph for letting me use his picture as a cover. Incidentally, I agree with the picnic basket; that was a very good line of dialogue you wrote for her.