In the dangerous, but rewarding, science of Daemonology, one must bear in mind two rules, above all else. First; one must never leave their circle, for to do so is to break the fragile pact keeping the daemon contained. Second, and perhaps even more importantly, one must phrase every word of the contract with the utmost care, for daemons are wily, and a single mistake may allow them to cause untold evil in the world.

-An Introduction to Daemonology, Volume 1

Anna bites her lip, shifts from one foot to the other. The heavy tome falls from her numb, freckled, fingers. The cover glints gold in the light of cheap candles; "An Introduction to Daemonology." A smudge shows dark on the faux leather cover where Anna had dropped a slice of pizza.

Two eyes glint in the darkness as if glowing with inner light, but Anna knows it's just the reflected flames of the candles. She hopes it's just the light from the candles.

"God," she says. "This was a terrible idea."

The daemon winces. The runes Anna has painted on the pale wooden flooring flare unpleasantly. The cheap candles gutter and hiss. Oh god this was a terrible idea. Anna lets out a deflated squeak.

"What do you desire, mortal?" The daemon rasps. It looks almost human. Too human. Human, except for the curling black horns, and voluminous white feathery, wings.

"Um?" Anna says intelligibly. The books had warned her. The books had told her that daemons are tricksters. That they will assume whatever form they think most beneficial to themselves. Still though…

"Power?" The daemon raises one perfect brow. "Wealth? Immortality?"

"Um, nooooo," Anna says. "God no." The daemon flinches again. "I'm. Um. Shut up. I want to do this right."

"Of course," the daemon replies.

There are two rune-ringed circles, painted on the wooden floor. Aramaic, if Anna's books are to be believed. She stands in one, the daemon in the other. It's an arrangement as old as the science of Daemonology itself; no one in their right mind would treat with a daemon without protections. Anna wonders abruptly if it's entirely sane to summon one of those horrible creatures even with bindings and circles. Anna glances down, searching for her book. There! Just outside her circle. She sighs. The daemon smirks.

"Shame," it says dryly.

"Shut up," Anna blushes.

"Oh!" It purrs. "I must be mistaken. I'm not your first, am I?"

"I said shut up!" Anna snarls.

"The first daemon you've ever summoned and you go for… me?" The daemon crosses its arms. "I don't know whether to be flattered or insulted."

"I want to make a deal," Anna says quickly. "A deal which, um," she screws up her face in concentration, "will not be altered once we both agree to it. And, um, you will not do anything that we don't agree to like eating my soul or something? Damn. I'm sure I'm forgetting something. Am I forgetting anything? Wait, no, you're a daemon. Why am I asking you?"

"This will be fun," it replies with an unsettling grin. "What do you want then, and what are you offering me in return?"

"I…" Anna trails off, then steels herself. Looks up boldly. Who will judge her, after all? The daemon? "I want you to give me a girlfriend!"

"A girlfriend?" The daemon snorts. "You summoned me, a daemon baron, just to give you a girlfriend?" It pauses for a second, and a wicked gleam comes into its eyes. "Supposing we did this deal, what would you offer in return?"

"Um," Anna sniffs. She wipes at her eyes quickly, hopes the daemon doesn't notice. "I… Well, certainly not my soul."

The daemon smiles. "How about your innocence? I would take that as payment."

"My…" Anna blinks. "I'm not innocent!"

"Then this deal costs you nothing," the daemon replies. Something about its grin sends chills running down Anna's spine like drops from a melting ice cube.

"Sure," Anna says. "What the hell. Sure!" When she looks up again, the daemon is gone, the candles extinguished. The harsh, electric whine of the lights rings unpleasantly in her ears as the chandelier overhead flickers back on. She blinks, bends to pick up her book, thinks better of it at the last moment. Clever daemon, almost got me. Anna grins, proud of her caution, and straightens slowly.

She rummages through her many pockets- ahah! Unused incense! She throws it into the daemon's circle, but nothing unexpected happens. Just a loose cloud of incense, drifting slowly to the floor, as if it were a legion of paratroopers dropping over Normandy. Anna shakes herself. She did it!

Anna grins fiercely. Her freckles stand out sharply in the harsh, electric, light. She did it! She really should clean up though. Put away the candles, sweep up the incense, do… something… with the painted, rune-rimmed circles.

Her phone rings, and she sighs with relief.

"Yellow," she answers, grimaces theatrically, though no one can see her. "Ugh. Shoot me if I ever say anything like that again."

"Not a chance red," comes the gruff reply.

"Kristoff!" Anna exclaims gleefully. "Guess what? Guess what?"

"Don't know. Tell me later," he says. "We're going out clubbing. Join us?"

Anna looks dubiously at the mess. She shrugs. "Sure!"

AN: Whelp. So this happened. I think it might have been because someone "informed" me that lesbian love is heresy, and, well, then I got drunk, and this was the result. They also said that one of my other stories was "the most heretical thing they have ever read," soooooo... challenge accepted!

I would apologize, but quite frankly, I don't want to.