Originally planning on doing this as a one shot - depends on how I feel and the feedback it gets. Had this idea a few months ago, only short but hope you enjoy!

Alicia sighed and rolled on to her back, smacking a hand over her face in frustration. She was tired now but sleep wasn't coming, not to her or Ethan.

'I don't think I even breathe when we're not together,' Ethan exhaled quietly, picking up she was also awake and very much in turmoil over the situation. 'Which means that when I see you on Monday morning, it's been easily sixty hours since I've taken a breath. A proper one, anyway. That's probably why I snap at you - all I do when we're together is panic. Every second just feels so important, Alicia, and I'm so out of control I can't help myself. I'm not even mine anymore. I'm yours, and what if you decide you don't want me? How could you want me like I want you?' He sighed. She was quiet. She wanted everything he'd said to be the last thing she heard. She wanted to fall asleep with 'I want you' in her ears, as for the first time, it felt genuine, and not like any of the others. Not just someone to use, someone to fill the physical space for a bit. No more pretending, because this was Ethan. This was the truth and she couldn't run from it. She wanted to soak it all up and feel the feeling forever; of being wanted at long last. Overcome, a tear rolled down her cheek and she moved to hide it, but Ethan had glanced over at the wrong time. He sighed, his throat closing up at the sight of her tears.

He blinked as she made eye contact with him, and lay down, outstretching an arm. Without further thought, she nestled down between his arm and the pillow. She was pressed up to him so, if she paid attention, she could feel the rhythmic beating of his heart. It seemed to soothe her, and it was only a few minutes before Ethan felt her relax as her eyes fluttered closed. He was careful to exhale, a heavy yet dull ache in his chest. Not the ache of something unreciprocated, the ache for this beautiful woman, and for how he knew she felt.

After some time of prolonged thinking, he realised the material of his t-shirt was getting uncomfortably warm and sticky with damp. Alicia fidgeted a bit, picking up on his flinching. 'Shh.' He soothed gently, rubbing circles on her back the way you would an infant. It seemed to be having a similar effect, for she'd quietened a little bit enough for him to start humming softly. 'Ethan, what are you doing?' She looked up now.

'It's meant to calm you, not have the opposite effect. Though I figured it would either make you laugh or sleep, and either is better than crying.' He said, a hand still rested on her back. Her eyes crinkled as she laughed softly, and then laid her head back down. He'd stopped now, and it was silent for a few seconds.

'Come on, I want to hear the rest...' She joked, voice quietening.

'Well your wish is my command then.' He whispered, and continued quietly humming. To Ethan's surprise, as he hadn't really been keeping time, Alicia had long since fallen asleep, and was now breathing steadily and peacefully. He smiled softly, took off his glasses and switched off the lamp to his side, careful not to disturb her in the process. He had a sense that somehow things would be alright, and he wondered why he'd never realised before. Sleep weighed on his eyelids, a wave that washed over him. He relented and drifted off, Alicia still half on him and half on the empty side. He pushed all nagging thoughts of Cal out his head, just for once. She was fragile and he was doing something his brother had never yet - taking good care for reasons other than superficial lust. He was at peace with this thought, and finally switched off.