The Spirit Within

For the third night in a row, Leonardo found himself launching out of bed and running down the hall before he was fully awake. The screams had turned to sobs, wrenching and wretched, hiccupping in a childlike way. Leo was shaking as he yanked open the door to his baby brother's room, and then he was sitting on the bed, his arms wrapped around Mikey's trembling form, just as Leo's own brain shocked itself with the stabbing reminder of why Mikey had been screaming.

"Shhh, little brother, shhh," he murmured. "I'm here. You're safe. I promise."

Leo couldn't promise anything anymore, not really. It made his gut shiver heavily.

Mikey sniffled, his breath hitching, before he was able to drag in enough air to form words. "It…it…was…so…bad…Leo…I saw D-Daddy again. I s-s-saw…h-he w-was…f-falling, I w-watched… a-and…we w-were all screaming…and th-then he w-as on th-the ground and-"

Leo tightened his grip, one hand cupping the back of Mikey's head, Mikey's tears wetting his collarbone. "It's in the past, Mikey," he whispered thickly. "It's over. He…he's gone and we're mourning, okay? It's natural for you to dream about it. It hurts. But we're here for each other."

There was a long silence. "Are…are we?" And Mikey pulled back a little and sniffled, raising his head. Leo looked down and his heart cracked. Mikey's chin was resting on his plastron, making his round freckled cheeks even rounder, his huge crystal blue eyes even wider and brighter. He looked too young; Leo was flashing back to when they were very small and Mikey would crawl to him for safety when Raphael was throwing tantrums, and Mikey would prop his chin on Leo's plastron and silently plead to be kept safe.

Swallowing, Leo used his thumb to stroke Mikey's cheeks, smoothing away the huge tears like he did when they were young.

"Are we?" Mikey repeated, hoarse and sad in a way that should never be. "You spend your time in the dojo, Donnie's shut away in the lab, Raph's in the weight room, I'm in the kitchen. I make food but we're not hungry, are we? I don't feel hungry. I just feel empty."

Leo bit his lip, remembering how Donnie came to him, solemn and worried because Mikey had been too quiet, too still, too uninterested. Leo had assured him that they were all grieving Splinter's death, and had been ready to dismiss it until Don mentioned depression, as in the medical disease, and Leo let his fear really show, no more brave masks or stiff postures. And the two had gone to the kitchen to figure out which herbal tea remedies Splinter had left behind that could help. And they had realized they would have to special order the proper blends, and maybe they should ask April for help, and they couldn't just go get prescription drugs, and then Raphael had wandered in, caught some of the words, and demanded to be told. And that was how Raph had sworn to do whatever it took to keep Mikey happy and well, like a secret pact that wasn't really secret.

They still hadn't asked April, but Leo wanted to, and Donnie already had a list of questions.

Leo still hadn't mentioned the fact that Master Splinter was still appearing to him in visions, even in his dreams. He hadn't said anything about what Splinter had been saying, how he had been able to touch his father in his dreams. How Leo glowed blue when this happened.

He remembered that day when Splinter, still drunk and still the best of the best, had told them that Leonardo and Michelangelo had the strongest ability to sharpen their intuition. Mikey had preened, teasing Raph, and Leo had merely confirmed his own internal truth. But he had also confirmed his suspicions about his little brother. Mikey's intuition was already incredibly sharp. Leo never say it out loud, but he had always watched Mikey, watched his reactions, how his eyes narrowed and his arms tensed and his mouth tightened. Mikey was already the most intuitive and the most spiritual. He always had been, and maybe if he really honed his abilities he could be at April's level. Of course, April was aided by alien mutant DNA. But it almost didn't matter. They had all been hit by that mutagen. Michelangelo always had a powerful connection to Kraang technology and Dimension X. For all they knew, Mikey's brain had the same hidden talents, untapped and unknown. Leo smiled a little. His baby brother would be awestruck and also playful. Mikey probably already knew something. Leo would have to have a talk with him.

But right now, Leo nuzzled his little brother's head and murmured at him, rubbing his carapace and rocking him. Gradually, Mikey became quiet, breathing without shuddering. His head relaxed against Leo's shoulder.

"Hey," Leo said softly, "you falling asleep on me?"

"You're comfy," came the muffled response, and Mikey sounded very young and very vulnerable.

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Leo asked, feeling his heart expand.

Mikey grabbed him in a tighter hug, and a firm nod turned into a nuzzle against his shoulder. Grinning, Leo shifted them both until he could grasp the blanket, and kept Mikey in his arms as he lay down. Mikey didn't let go, not even when his breathing evened out and his body got a little heavier.

Leo's dreams were full of his father's smile, and of his baby brother glowing orange as he faced Leo in the dojo.

They were at it again. Mikey covered his ear slits and ran on silent feet into Donnie's lab, pressing against the door and breathing hard. Donnie glanced up from his chemistry work and frowned, eyes going wide. He set down his work and made his way over to his shaking brother, pulling him toward his new computer desk that April got him and sitting him down on one of the new plush chairs.

"They're fighting again," Mikey said morosely. His face was flushed, dark circles ringed his eyes.

"Oh, Mikey." Don took his hands. "They'll cool off. They always do."

Mikey shook his head. "I can feel them, Donnie. I can feel the anger and the fear and…and…and the…they don't know what they're doing, so…" His wrists and hands flapped in the air and Donnie realized he was struggling to find the right words. He hadn't realized how truly sensitive Mikey was. Could Mikey always sense his family's emotional states? Was that why he was always joking around, to cover it up? He thought back to the times when he was overly frustrated about a project and Mikey simply smiled at him, and Donnie felt suddenly calm and collected.

Receptive and projective empathy, Donnie thought. Did Mikey even realize what he was doing? Master Splinter had said he had the strongest ability to hone his intuition. But Mikey must have already known that. Right?

"Can I stay in here for a while?" Mikey's usual cheerful voice, with its scratchy, rounded-guttural tenor, was raspier and rougher than usual. He sounded exhausted. Donatello felt his breath hitch and he reached for the only bag of tea blend that Karai and April could find so far regarding depression: bacopa, ashwagandha, mucuna. As it steeped, Don pulled Mikey into his arms and squeezed him tight.

Mikey's voice broke. "I miss Papa…" And Don felt his heart rise in his throat, felt tears sting the corners of his eyes. And at the same time, he felt something sweep over him, warm and sweet like sunlight and a soft breeze, and when he looked at his brother, he was startled to see Mikey smiling, Mikey's eyes glittering with knowledge, Mikey winking.

The shouting beyond the lab doors stopped. Mikey pulled back and headed toward the door. "Wait," Donnie said, "I want you to drink this tea. It's got honey in it."

"Is it like that stuff you wanted to give me?"

"Yes. Consider this a trial run."

When Mikey drank the tea down in just a few gulps, Don sighed, closed his eyes, released a sharp breath, and then opened the lab door.

Leonardo and Raphael stood just outside, weapons pointing at each other, both sweating and panting. Their eyes slid almost guiltily to the sight of a taller brother glaring and a smaller brother pouting.

"Are you done?" Donatello asked flatly.

"Yeah," Leo said, sheathing his swords.

"Maybe," Raph muttered, holstering his sai.

"You made Mikey cry, you know."

The older boys shifted uncomfortably. "Sorry, Mikey. Sorry, Donnie."

"Grief and mourning is never a straight, easy process," Don continued, but if you really need to battle your feelings out, can you do it somewhere we can't hear? This affects all of us."

"Yes, Donnie."

"Sorry, Donnie."

Raphael finally looked up, his eyes a darker green. "Mikey, are you all right?"

Michelangelo nodded. "Donnie made me some of that depression tea."

In a few strides, Raph had gathered the baby brother in his arms. "I'm sorry, Mikey. I'm sorry. This sucks. I don't know what to do with myself. I'm hurting, and…and I'm afraid I'll hurt you too."

"I know, Raph, and it's okay." Gently, Mikey shifted and kissed his cheek. "Just breathe."

And then Raph blinked, and his expression went from confusion to contentment. "Mikey…was that…what…did you do somethin' to me?"

Mikey patted his shoulder. "I just helped you feel calm, okay? Now if you don't mind, I should make us lunch."

He skipped off to the kitchen, humming, as if nothing had happened. The older brothers stared at each other.

"Leo?" Don asked.

"I…" Leo bit his lip. "His aura looks okay. But there are these spots and flecks of darker colors. I'm not sure what that means. Like, around his head there are these gray and black splotches."

Raphael swallowed. "Can't you…um…you know…meditate and find Master Splinter? In the spirit world? Can you talk to him?"

Leo looked at the ground. "I…I don't know, Raph. I'm still figuring this all out."

Donnie looked at him. "But you've got a strong enough grip on your spiritual abilities. I'm sure he's come to you. I'm sure you can reach out for him."

Leo clenched his teeth. Was this even the time to tell them the truth? If he told them he already was seeing Father, would they push him into trying harder? And suddenly he felt guilty. How many times had he ordered Donnie to try harder?

"Mikey appears to have harnessed powerful psychic empathic abilities," Don said after a moment.

Raph blinked. "What, like that alien on Space Heroes?"

Donnie nodded, noticing how Leo perked up. "Exactly. Not only can he sense what we're feeling, he can transmit his emotional energy to us. He can manipulate…well, maybe that's not the best word."

"He can read and manipulate emotions so someone could calm down completely…or go into a rage," Leo murmured, the faraway look in his eyes placing him in the world of his favorite TV show. "Wait. Can he?"

Donnie shrugged. "He did it to me. He just did it to Raph."

Leo and Raph exchanged an alarmed glance.

"That sounds kinda dangerous," Raph said.

Donnie looked back at Leo. "And that's why you should try to find Sensei on the spiritual plane and ask for his advice. Or maybe Karai or April can help! April is a telepath."

Leonardo bit his lip, clenching his fists. "I…guys, I've already seen Master Splinter." He waited for the gasps of shock. There were none. "I dream about him. I have visions. I dunno if Mikey does too, but-"

Raph grabbed him by the shoulders. "Do it, then! Do it! What're you waiting for? Why didn't you say anything? Mikey needs this! We need this! Why aren't you already doing this?"

"Because I'm scared!" Leo yelled. "I…I'm afraid that it'll prove I'm weak as a leader and sensei, have to ask my dead father all these questions that I should be able to know myself! Because I…because I wasn't strong enough to protect him."

He found himself embraced by two brothers, being squeezed. "Don't you dare," Raph gasped. "There was nothing we could've done."

A throat cleared behind them. "Uh, food's ready," Mikey announced. "Y-you don't have to eat it now…"

They disentangled and managed to smile. "Come on," Don said, draping his arms around their shoulders. "We'll feel better once we've eaten."

Mikey's smile was like the sun.

He waited a few days before testing his unspoken theory; he didn't want to spook his brothers, But it was time now.

Leonardo settled himself before the dojo tree, calling up this new spiritual power like the flow of a river. He sensed Michelangelo, kneeling beside him, and that rush of spiritual power from his baby brother was like a burst of oxygen, blooming life and warmth and sunlight. He reminded himself to not feel envy or jealousy.

Mikey spoke in a whisper, but to Leo it was a shout. "It's like my whole brain just expanded and I feel everything."

Leo frowned. That wasn't quite his experience; his spiritual feelers were more refined and detailed, seeking out information. Mikey's seemed more like a solid mist spreading everywhere, eager and childlike in curiosity. How deeply could Mikey sense things? Has Sensei known all this time? Should Leo have known?

Sighing, Leo bit his lip, huffed, and concentrated again. His aura rose around him, streamlined and steady, taut and waiting, patient and quiet. It hummed comfortingly.

And then that flowing sunset orange mist nudged it, carefully wrapping around the edges of Leo's energy, prodding so gently, trying to find a way to ask politely. Leo reminded himself to relax completely. Mikey had an insatiably curious nature, naturally his spiritual energy would be the same. But Master Splinter had never mentioned auras being able to expand so rapidly outside their own boundaries.

"Mikey," he hissed. "Quit poking me."

"M'not," Mikey hissed back. "It's doing that by itself."

"What, you can't control it?" Leo jerked back in horror, his eyes snapped open, his head whipping to the side.

Michelangelo slowly opened his eyes and turned to smile at Leo. It was a kind, gentle smile, easy and delicate. Something in his eyes…his pupils were dilated and the strips of summer blue were glittering. "I never said that," and Mikey's voice was different, soft and sweet like a kitten's purr. Leo blinked, and sunset color surrounded Mikey, tapping and bouncing against his skin like waves. Around his head, the aura looked like a radiating star, like a solar eclipse with Mikey's head as the moon. Mikey opened his mouth in a grin, and the color was there too, puffing like vapor from his mouth.

"Leo," the colors said, "Don't worry. It's all good. Everything is awesome."

Leo watched as Mikey's aura only brightened and widened, spilling out into the dojo, colliding with the tree and lighting it up with colors he had only seen in outer space. He couldn't breathe. He pressed both hands to his chest. It was too much. As Leo felt himself slide sideways, he saw a white core of power, ringed in summer blue, the color of his brother's eyes.

"…eo? Leo, I'm sorry. You gotta wake up. Can you hear me? Please, big brother, we need you!"

It was Mikey's voice, but it was Mikey as a child, tormented by endless nightmares, scrabbling to cling to Leonardo's plastron in tears, and Leo would automatically embrace him tightly, so tightly, and murmur, "Shh, little brother. I'm here. I'll keep you safe. I'll always keep you safe."

"Guys, did you hear that? He said something!"

"Are you sure, Mikey? He hasn't even moved in six hours."

"Donnie, I swear, he said something! Leo, say it again? Leo! Leo, please! Wake up, wake up!"

"Mikey, don't shake him! Quit it, ya shellhead. What did you do again?"

"Stop it, Raph, I didn't do anything, I swear! No! Lemme go! Leo!"

"Ow! Mikey! Stop hitting me!"

"Raph, ease up. Maybe Mikey can connect with him. They were meditating with their new spiritual intuitions, after all."

"It's been six hours, Don. Ya think something would've, y'know, happened?"

"Maybe he's lost. In the colors."

"Mikey, you're making less sense than usual."

There was blackness, then whiteness, then a rush of colors like a rainbow erupting. His own dark gray-blue, Mikey's amber orange, Donnie's soft violet purple, Raph's deep crimson red. They danced around each other frenetically, and the orange fringed them all, mist flowing like water and air, curling in a strange attempt to calm them.

"Leo, I had a bad dream, there was a big monster with teeth and he hurt Papa and then he tried to hurt you, and I couldn't find Raphie or Donnie, and I was alone and no one could help…"

"Mikey, it wasn't real, you know that. Dreams aren't real. They're all in your mind. Your mind wants to scare you so you can learn to be brave."

Those lamp-like eyes shone at him. "You're already brave. I bet you don't have nightmares."

He smiled. "Of course I do Mikey. I have nightmares about losing all of you. But then I remember that I will wake up and you'll all be here."

The hug got tighter. "I'll always be here, Leo. Promise you will be too?"

"I promise, Mikey…promise…s'okay…it's okay…"

"LEO!" The shout was full of amber orange and he flinched. He felt something – someone – close to his head.

"Leo? Can you hear me?"

He groaned, his entire body feeling weighed down. "D-Don?"

"Oh, thank science. Can you open your eyes?"

"Nnngghh…" He pried his eyelids open and his vision was filled with russet eyes framed in purple. He decided to try breathing, and was grateful when oxygen filled his lungs. "Donnie. Mikey? What happened?"

"Leeoo!" And then Mikey's freckled face was all he could see as Donnie was shoved aside with a grunt. "Leo, what happened? What did you see? I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to do whatever I did. It just went everywhere. I couldn't figure out how to pull it back. I think I exploded you! I'm so so sor-"

"Mikey, Mikey…" As he struggled on his elbows, Leo realized he was lying on a mattress, still in the dojo, his head on a pillow. There was equipment lying around him. His head was pounding. He took several deep gulps of air and rolled his head, neck, shoulders. Everything seemed to be all right. He was just wrung out. Donnie was holding up a tablet-like device pointed at Leo.

"What is that, Don?"

"Hm? Oh, something Dr. Rockwell built for me. It scans the body and the brain like a CT scan. Neat, huh? Anyway, you're completely fine, except you went into a near coma for six hours, and your brain activity was wild."

"When did Rockwell build that?"

Don waved a hand. "I dunno, a week ago. I hadn't gotten a chance to use it on anyone but myself. It uses Kraang tech to pinpoint accuracy, so I can tell if there's internal damage, brain injury…plus, it helps keep track of April's psionic powers. I figured I could track these new abilities you and Mikey have been displaying."

"Don, can you look at me while you're talking?"

"Sorry." Donatello, glanced up from the screen, frowning. "Does anything hurt? Do you think you can stand up?"

Leo rubbed his head. "I'd love something for this migraine. Raph, help me up."

Standing was much better than he had expected. Raph held onto him like he expected Leo to fall, but Leo squared his shoulders, cracked his neck, and sighed. "That feels better. Now. Mikey…"

And when he looked next to Donnie, he realized that Mikey had taken a few steps back and was trembling, head down, hands twisting.

"Mikey, wait. Hey. It's okay. I'm fine." Leo spread his arms, spun easily on one foot, grinned widely. But his littlest brother stayed, and the shaking increased, until there were tears at the corners of his eyes and tiny whimpers in the back of his throat.

Raphael ran to his side, throwing an arm around him, green eyes wide and alarmed. "Mikey, what's the matter with you? Don't tell me you're gonna pass out too!"

But Mikey could only shake his head back and forth, and his breathing became harsh, and Raph was now embracing him completely, staring at Leo and Donnie in utter frustration and worry. "Donnie, use that thingy, quick! Make him stop!"

As Don scanned the freckled turtle, small beeps came from the tablet and Don jumped back, frowning. "Wait, I don't get…hang on…there's a massive energy fluctuation! Can you hold him still? I need to bring this closer to his head…"

Leo began to feel the rush of his spiritual energy flow and expand, and this time it felt insistent, impatient, searching. All he could do was hang on and watch as his aura moved toward Mikey's aura, which responded by widening and enfolding Leo's own. Leo gawped, watching the colors curl and wrap around each other. But then, dark spots began to appear in Mikey's orange, and Leo suddenly felt chilled. His blue appeared to be trying to cover the spots.

Donnie was tapping furiously on the screen. "It's like an electric storm. It looks like his neurons are rapidly misfiring."

"English, please!" Raph snarled.

"I think he's having some sort of seizure!" Don yelled. And then Mikey let out a strangled scream and slumped bonelessly in Raph's arms.

Leo's scream was just as strangled.

Sensei hadn't prepared him for this!

Leo trembled like a leaf, sitting with his legs folded under him against the wall of Mikey's bedroom. Mikey was sleeping like the dead. It had been thirteen hours. In desperation, they had called the Mutanimals; Doctor Rockwell and Slash came with medical equipment like IV fluids and muscle relaxants and painkillers. Leo struggled with meditation, his mind lurching toward his little brother without trying. Where did you go, Mikey? Where are you in your mind? Are you even in your mind? I have to find you.

He was alone, and he was afraid.

Air in front of him flickered, and his father's voice drifted clearly. "Leonardo."

Leo jolted, staring in the dimness. "Father…? Father, it's you!"

The rat stood tall and smiling, glancing at Mikey on the bed. "He will be all right, my son. But you must guide each other in your new spiritual abilities. It will be most difficult for Michelangelo to sort through the constant sound and force inside his mind."

"What do you mean?" Leo asked. "Like his ADHD?"

"Yes," Splinter said, "and no. His untapped potential yields a great amount of energy. He will need to learn how to channel it properly lest it turn against him."

Leo frowned. "Like…like headaches?"

"Or more," his master warned. "Take care of each other. Take care of your brothers."

He faded, and Leo couldn't help a whine burst from him. He reached out, his hand brushing against air. In desperation, he shuffled to the bed and grabbed Mikey's hand, squeezing it. "Time to wake up, Mikey. I need you. I can't do this on my own. I don't know what happened back there with your aura, but we need to figure this out together. So, you need to wake up. Please. Wake up."

There was a tickle inside his mind. It turned into a breeze, slight and gentle, and then suddenly he was hearing a thought. Not his thought. Not his voice.

Since…you asked…so nicely…hang on, bro…

Leonardo gasped out loud, a long hard inhale that sent a shiver all down his body. "Um. Mikey?"

There was nothing. But Mike's eyelids shifted and fluttered. And then, very, very slowly, they cracked open to reveal glazed bright blue irises staring right at Leo.

"…hi," he croaked.

"Mikey!" Leo yelled, forgetting himself. He nearly crushed his brother's hand between his own two, then leaned down to nuzzle his beak. "Oh, shell, are you okay?"

"Tired," Mikey whispered. "Th-thirsty."

"Shit, you need water…" Leo jumped to his feet, hardly aware of himself. "Is there water around here? Why isn't there water? DONNIE!"

And he found himself at the doorway, peeking behind his shoulder to make sure Mikey was still awake. "DONNIE! RAPH! BRING WATER! MIKEY NEEDS WATER!"

There was a massive commotion, and suddenly Leo found himself shoved back by two brothers, two humans, a mutant monkey, and a giant mutant box turtle.

"Mikey," Donnie was nearly crying, "I wasn't sure if you'd wake up. How do you feel, little brother?"

And Raph was breathing in quick, short breaths that Leo recognized as trying to hold back tears.

And April was just crying outright.

"Guys…?" Mikey's sore voice cut through. "'re you okay? Why's…ev'ryone…crying…? Did…did I screw up again? 'M sorry if I did…"

Leo tried to see everything, but Casey was blocking him. He could see Don and Rockwell crouched at the bed, doing…things. Mikey was making familiar whining sounds. He could make out Donnie and a bottle of water, holding it to Mikey's mouth. Leo narrowed his eyes and shoved at Casey's shoulder. Mikey had downed half the bottle already. He lay back against the propped pillows and breathed deeply.

"I'm cool, Dee," he murmured, blinking slowly like a cat.

"Not actually," Rockwell muttered. "You appear to be running a high fever, your brainwaves are constantly moving from one state to another, and I'm getting readings that you have been hallucinating."

Leo blinked. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught a transparent Splinter, eyeing him before vanishing. He held his tongue. Had Mikey seen Splinter's spirit before he had his seizure? Or during? How did Mikey talk in his mind like that? Did Splinter have a hand in it?

"…wanna talk to Leo." Mikey's voice startled him and he shook his head. His brothers and friends were now staring at him. They quietly began shuffling out of the room. Donnie and April stayed, hovering in the doorway. As Leo sat on the edge of the bed, he noticed Mikey and April sharing a long look.

"April too," Mikey said, and he sounded stronger.

As April joined Leo, kneeling at the bed, Don folded his arms.

"Donnie," April said softly, "If anything happens, we'll call for you." And she put her hand on Mike's cheek. Donnie nodded, and closed the door behind him.

Mikey gave them both the biggest, sunniest grin he could, weak as it was. "You guys, I saw Master Splinter! And Leo, I know you saw him too!"

April's jaw dropped and she stared back and forth. Leo felt his mouth quirk in a happy smile.

It was twenty minutes later, and the family, including Karai, was gathered in Mikey's room, seating facing his bed. Leo had climbed in, supporting an exhausted baby brother, with Donnie perched on the edge of the mattress, holding Mikey's wrist as though it were porcelain, despite Mikey's complaints.

"None of us have had a seizure and slept so hard for over half a day," Donnie snapped back.

Casey had brought several boxes of pizza.

"Now," Karai said firmly, "have you seen our father's spirit before this?"

Leo and Mikey glanced at each other. "Um," Leo began, "I did see him during my fight with Super Shredder, he encouraged me to keep going. Oh, and I saw him right after the funeral, after we buried him and everyone was gone…"

"Almost everyone," Mikey said, holding up a finger, "I was sitting on his grave crying my face off."

Leo paused and gaped at him, tears forming in his eyes.

"I left, though," Mikey said quickly. "It was cold. I just…I just wanted to give him a hug, y'know?"

Nobody moved or spoke. April and Raph each let out a shuddering breath.

"During the battle," Mikey supplied. "I didn't see him, but, like, felt him. I sensed him when I was attacking Super Shredder. Like, I felt his power, his strength. I swear my 'chucks were glowing. It was totally spiritual."

"Well," Donatello surmised, "Sensei did call you and Leo the most skilled in spiritual intuition. I'm probably the least, aside from Casey." Casey coughed in the background but was silent.

"And apparently I'm the most advanced," April said. "I guess it's because of my Kraang half? But wait, didn't you guys say that Mikey is the most talented in Dimension X, and with Kraang tech? Maybe he has…I dunno, hidden abilities."

"Oh, no…" Raph muttered under his breath just as Mikey sat up, excitement on his face.

"Oh, maan! If that's true I could totally be a superhero! Like pew pew pew from my brains, yo!"

Leo wrapped his arms around Mikey's shoulders to stop him squirming. "Concentrate on right now, Mikey. What about when you were unconscious?"

"Oh. Um." Mikey's brow furrowed. "Uh. Well, yeah, I saw him. We were talking. I was standing next to that pond near the farmhouse, okay? And, and Sensei was there. But I couldn't remember anything about how we got there. And I'm like 'Sensei, you've never been here before' and he's like 'I was here, when you buried me, and this was a safe haven for my children. This is where your mind sent you, and my spirit.' So that made sense. So I ask him what's up, and he says, 'I spoke with Leonardo. He is watching your body as you sleep. I told him of your great potential, your powers of intuition and spiritual enhancement. Out of all your brothers, you are naturally the most spiritually strongest, you have the most raw ability' and I'm like, 'What, you mean like unfocused ability or whatever?' and he nodded and said I should ask Leo and April for help, and he said he had hoped to get me more physically focused on training but he was satisfied with what I already knew, because my gaming skills were perfect and that meant I had, um, perfect whatsit, uh, fast-twitch muscle fibers, that my reflexes were among the best he'd ever seen, something something balance, more potential concentration and hyperfocus blah blah blah." By this point his arms were flailing, his expression wide open and animated. But he was panting and sweat was pouring down his face, and Casey had left and come back with a bowl of cool water and a washcloth, and Leo was wiping Mikey down from top of head to just above the plastron, and Mikey stopped babbling to let out a long sigh.

"Okay, Mikey," Donnie murmured, "stop talking for a while." He had a notepad and pen and was scribbling. "Well, hyperfocus is a huge part of ADHD, and we see it when you dance, listen to music, when you really fight hard, when you read your comics. If we can help you really channel that part of your mind, we can probably focus your spiritual talents like a laser."

"Neat," Mikey breathed, closing his eyes as Leo continued to wipe him down, turning gratefully into Leo's touch.

Leo told them what Splinter had said during his appearance in Mikey's room.

"Oh," Don bit his lip, "so we'd definitely need to keep an eye out for headaches."

April perked up. "I used to have headaches all the time. I could show him some of what I've learned. Wouldn't it be amazing if it turned out that his brain was really influenced by Dimension X and he really did have these hidden talents?"

Donnie blinked. "I'd certainly owe him a hundred apologies for yelling at him. He somehow plays with chemistry and makes it work even if it seems randomly and wildly haphazard. He just…knows things."

Raph narrowed his eyes, then shrugged. "Maybe he's not an idiot after all."

"Maybe…" Casey tapped his finger against his lower lip. "Maybe his brain is supposed to be alien, dudes! Maybe that's why he acts like an idiot, because our laws of physics don't apply to him."

Donnie gave him a withering look. "That makes no sense, Casey, and you're still an idiot."

Casey huffed and folded his arms. "Am not, and it makes total sense. Maybe you're just pissed because it's a better theory than what you might come up with, so-called brainiac."

Don snarled and began to move toward Casey, before Leo shushed him and nodded at their little brother. Mikey was fast asleep, making tiny whimpers, face flushed, fingers twitching.

Donnie leaned forward, watching carefully, making more notes in the journal.

"I don't want to alarm anyone," he said softly, "but this could be another seizure."

Casey stood up and peered over his shoulder. "Yeah, I've seen this enough with hockey players. Someone actually developed epilepsy cuz they got frequent concussions."

At Raphael's horrified face, he held up his hands. "Not that…not that Mikey will, but, you know…um…um…Don, help me out here?"

"Casey has a good point," Don muttered. "And we do smack Mikey on the head a lot. Plus, if his spiritual powers really are developing, this could cause a neuronal overload, neurons misfiring too quickly, potentially leading to something similar to seizure-induced neuronal necrosis…"

Raphael made a loud, choked noise somewhere between a shriek and a wheeze. "Uh. Necrosis means death."

Don blinked at him. "Yes. Brain cell death. And before you make that tired joke, I'm not talking about Mikey turning stupid, I'm talking about potential brain functions slowing slightly. Coordination, balance, behavior, emotional control."

Raph's mouth slammed shut so fast his teeth clicked.

"I can't…I…can't…do this…I…" He held his hands up. They were shaking. "I gotta go…"

And as he began to shove his way to the door, Leo said in his Leader Voice, "Raphael."

Raph froze, back straightening.

"Raph, turn around and look at me."

The command, fifteen years of obedience from their father, forced Raph to meet Leo's eyes. He was still shaking.

"We need you, Raph. Mikey needs you. Don't walk away from this. You can't. You can't punch the training bag and go for a run and beat up criminals and expect to come home and everything be fine. Master Splinter is dead. And Mikey is affected badly, and maybe I am too because I've been seeing Father everywhere. But our little brother might have a brain injury and we need everyone on the same page. You can direct your rage at the Foot, at Tiger Claw, at Xever and Rahzar. But not inward, not this time. Raph, we need you with us." Leo's hand tightened around the washcloth pressed to Mikey's face. Mikey's closed eyes had tears in them, as if he could hear everything.

Leo bumped their foreheads, murmuring. And then, Mikey burst into tears, in that honest space between sleep and wake. And he whispered, "Guys, don't go, please."

"Donnie, he's really burning up," Leo said.

"I promise I'll be g-good. I p-promise I won't prank you, I'll make r-real food not just weird pizza, I o-only like all that weird f-food cuz it's human food and we're not used to it and I just w-wanna try everything at once, I just wanna see if I can eat everything cuz it's so tasty, dudes, don't take it away from m-me…just don't go, just stay, p-please, if I'm the one screwing up I'll do better, I promise, just don't go away like Papa did…"

And they stared at each other in naked horror. Donatello and Rockwell rushed over, babbling in science, hands ghosting over Michelangelo's shivering, trembling body, and his panting became strained, caught in his throat, half cough.

"Seizure," Dr Rockwell muttered, and reached into his duffel bag. He pulled out a vial and a syringe. Donnie's eyes narrowed. "Diazepam. Valium?"

"It will assist his body's recovery," the ape insisted, filling the syringe, flicking the edge of the needle before grabbing Mikey's arm and tapping veins. Leo just kept holding him and holding him. Rockwell injected carefully, and in less than a minute, Mikey slumped against Leo, cracking his eyelids open, mouth open, saliva trailing. Leo gently wiped it away.

Leonardo sighed shakily and looked toward his other brother, who had remained rooted to the spot, eyes huge and shining.

Right next to him was Master Splinter.

Leo swallowed, struggling to keep himself neutral.

Splinter, his ears drooping, smiled. He nodded. And then he went through the motions of the Healing Hands mantra, something Leo hadn't seen for ages. A tiny thread of anger and frustrated desperation slid through him.

And without thinking, Leo thought at him, Why? Why now? What about when you were alive? Why didn't you teach all of us? What about Mikey, if you knew he was so spiritual? You didn't teach us everything, Sensei, we still need you!

Splinter's head bowed. I apologize, my son. I had my reasons, and unfortunately there was no time…

Something dark and heavy rose up inside him, and he gripped his baby brother tightly, closing his eyes and gritting his teeth. No time. No time to say anything to us. Except me. My burden. My brothers are my students now. You owe us. You owe me and Mikey. Your reasons must be shared, Master. Not now, but soon.

Splinter's spiritual hand brushed over his head. After Michelangelo has recovered and begun training with you, Leonardo. I can explain why I always knew he was destined to be so powerful—

The heavy dark thing slammed into him and it took every ounce of willpower not to yell. You knew. You always knew this would happen to him, and you knew it would happen after you died. I'm right, aren't I?

There was silence. He opened his eyes. Splinter was crying, hand outstretched. And he faded.

"Daddy," Mikey sobbed into Leo's neck, "don't go."

Leonardo gasped for air and forced himself to maintain control, as Donnie put a hand on his shoulder and asked, "Leo, are you okay?"

It took three days for Michelangelo to recover completely. The Mutanimals and Karai came in and out, monitoring as he stumbled and babbled through a scarily high fever and another seizure. On the fourth morning, Leo stumbled into the dojo to find his little brother performing a slow, difficult kata with his eyes closed, T-Pod in his belt, dancing into the moves. Leo folded his arms and watched, and as Mikey began to twirl both nunchaku to the beat of techno, he launched into an unexpected capoeira form that finished as a ballet move. Leo just shook his head.

As Mikey's eyes opened and he stood straight to bow at the tree, Leo approached him.

"I'm not teaching you that," Mikey said, not looking at him.

"I don't expect you to," Leo said.

"Gonna make breakfast now."

"I'll join you in the kitchen once I'm done."

"Scrambled eggs and toast?"

"Please."

Mikey spun on a heel and exited, and Leo shook his head and began the same kata the way it was supposed to be done.

Leo entered the kitchen to the smells of eggs and spices, bacon, perfectly brown toast, green tea, coffee, energy drinks. Mikey was humming as he worked the eggs with one hand and the toast with the other. Raph and Don slowly entered, and Mikey immediately spun and slid to Donnie with a full mug of coffee. Don took it with a smile. Half a second later, Mikey stuffed bacon into Raph's slowly opening mouth.

Leo grinned. He sat down with his plate of food and his tea, watching the others eat quietly and slowly. Mikey didn't sit until he had cleaned everything up, and when he began eating, he was too fast to see. Somehow, they all finished at the same time.

Donnie sat back and sighed into his second coffee. His little brother was so random. He wished he himself could be softer, a little more patient, less anxious about everything, but he supposed they all had their little brain issues. Mikey's obvious ADHD, Raph's temperamental emotional outbursts, Leo's bizarre perfectionist complex, Donnie's own obsessive anxieties. He really needed to stop yelling at Mikey so much in the lab, but Mikey's atypical brain read warning signs as challenges. He took another sip…and then it hit him.

"Caffeine!" he shouted at the mug. "Of course!"

He glanced up. His family was staring at him.

Don waved his arms. "Caffeine has similar effects to the chemicals in drugs commonly used to treat Attention Defecit Hyperactivity Disorder, Inattentive Type, which Mikey has. It's not like we can order a prescription for him. He needs to start drinking more caffeine, it might help balance out the neurotransmitters."

"Donnie," Raph said very slowly, "Are. You. INSANE? Wouldn't coffee and energy drinks make him more hyper?"

"No!" Don said triumphantly. "No, that's just it, with ADHD it has the exact opposite effect. Stimulants would keep the flow of the proper neurotransmitters in check. See, in ADHD, the neurotransmitter is prematurely reabsorbed back into the neuron. So, that portion of the neural network cannot relay messages in an adequate and timely way, thus contributing to the disordered working and wiring." His hands flew even faster, and he keenly noticed that the only brother keeping up was Mikey.

"So, okay, this means that the drug, say, caffeine, would hold the neurotransmitters, like dopamine and norepinephrine, longer in the synapse so it can affectively bind to the receptor, so messages in the brain are better received, which is how typical, regular brains work. Mikey's brain can't do that by itself. Joining the neurotransmitter to the receptor is fitting a key into a lock. Caffeine would just help facilitate the fitting of the key."

Leo and Raph had blank, glazed looks. But Mikey's face had lit up, his eyes sparkling. He had propped his cheeks in his hands, and the grin on his face was like a light bulb.

"I didn't understand a word you said, Dee. But I totally get what you're talkin' about."

That was good enough. Don quickly poured another cup, adding more sugar and cream. "If you want, I can add some chocolate syrup, cocoa cancels out the bitterness," he babbled.

Mikey just took the mug and smiled serenely. "You do you, Donnie," he said, and took a long gulp. Don watched his eyes close, his tongue run across his lips. There was silence for a moment.

"It's good," Mikey said. "I'ma add cinnamon and cocoa, though." And he was rummaging through the cupboards, and Don slapped his forehead, because of course Mikey would want to add to a food, he was a chef by nature.

Ten minutes later, Mikey was stirring his little blend into one of the many travel mugs that April had gifted Donnie with, humming. He drank the whole thing down in three swigs.

They stared at him.

He stared back, expressionless.

He broke out into a soft, tranquil smile. "Dude. It's quiet in here."

Donatello grinned and pumped his fist "SCIENCE!"

Mikey turned to him and started to giggle. He paused and craned his neck, looking over Don's shoulder. He lifted his hand and waved.

"Hey, Dad," he said softly. "Guess you figured something was up, that's why you trained me a little differently in private, huh?"

Donnie jumped and spun around, as did Raph. Nothing was there.

Leo and Mikey just looked at each other, smiled, and shrugged.

Leo stomped into the dojo and slammed his knees onto the mat with a huff; these fights with Raph were too repetitive and exhausting. He inhaled, focusing on the tree. Raph was in the pit punching training dummies. Donnie was in the lab. Mikey had gone out skateboarding through the sewers an hour ago, so Leo soothed himself with the knowledge that at least Mikey had been spared the yelling and shoving.

He slipped quickly into meditation, recalling the techniques he and Mikey had been practicing together every day. Splinter had been coming to them both more frequently and it had calmed him like nothing else.

Time began to melt away, and Leo lost himself in a vast world of color and sensation, his deep gray-blue, Raph's warm dark red, Donnie's cool vibrant purple, Mikey's golden orange.

The orange began to shiver, and suddenly he knew what it was like for a color to scream.

Leonardo!

His eyes snapped open "Sensei?"

Master Splinter was standing in front of the tree. "Michaelangelo is injured. You must go to him."

He scrambled to his feet. "Where? How?"

"Tunnel 37," Splinter said, suddenly seeming very solid. "His skateboard struck a buried pipe and cracked, causing him to lose balance. He fell badly and he cannot move. I have comforted him as best I could. He is bleeding and losing consciousness. His leg is broken."

Wordlessly, Leo sprinted out of the dojo, yelling for his remaining brothers.

"How do you know?" Donnie was already on his T-Phone to track Mikey's phone.

"Master Splinter told me." And that was it. They rushed out with Donnie hefting a duffel bag of medical supplies, taking two patrol buggies. Leo and Raph drove fitfully and almost recklessly toward Tunnel 37, but Donnie, sitting with Leo, didn't admonish them at all, and his knuckles were almost white against the strap of his bag.

It took fifteen minutes, and by that time Leo's head was pounding and fogged with dull amber orange weakly throbbing. Donatello held out his T-Phone and pointed, as they began walking into the tunnel. Leonardo's headache was becoming sharp and it was getting hard to take deep breaths. Raphael took his arm and he hardly noticed.

"Mikey!" Don called out, and ran forward. He crouched and immediately dropped the duffel bag, opening it and rummaging. Leo, with Raph's help, slowly made his way over, swallowing against the increasing pain.

"Oh, shit," Raph whispered.

Mikey was slumped against the brick wall, left leg buried under rubble, blood running down his face and both arms. Several feet away, a skateboard was snapped nearly in half, resting forlornly over a shape curving out from the ground. The hidden pipe, Leo realized. As he stared around, he noticed a nightmare of metal parts sticking up, jagged and pointed and gritty. Leo shivered, eternally grateful that Don and Splinter had worked hard to make sure their mutations proved them immune to tetanus.

Don was already applying treatments to multiple scrapes and cuts. There was an ugly gash in Mikey's left shoulder, several lacerations along his right arm, a deep cut above his right eye, and scrapes across his plastron. Raph was digging at the bricks and dirt to free his leg. Leo used his katana to help, and together they gently lifted Mikey's leg, which was already sliced up along the thigh. Right below the knee was a terrible bruised swelling and Leo knew the bone was snapped nearly in half.

Donatello was murmuring something like, "Head injuries always look worse because they bleed more…" But Leo was holding Mikey's leg like a precious thing and breathing slowly, repeating the Healing Hands mantra in his head, setting the leg on his thighs so he could free his hands, automatically working his fingers. Raph was calling to him. He could feel his blue aura searching out Mikey's orange. As it connected, he looked up at his green-eyed brother. "Raph, help me set the bone." Raph wordlessly complied. Luckily, Mikey didn't make a sound or struggle as the sickening sound of bone sliding against bone filled Leo's ears. The mantras swirled around the break site colorfully, out of Leo's control.

"What did you do?" he heard Donnie ask. "Was that Splinter's healing mantras?"

Leo nodded, suddenly tired. "I have no idea what it'll do, but maybe it'll encourage the bone to heal faster."

Donnie hissed something like "Would've been real useful so many times in the past…" and Leo didn't blame the anger he sensed there.

Donnie applied bandages to the cleaned-out wounds. The shoulder would need stitches, the leg splinted. They maneuvered Mikey into one of the buggies, which Raph drove very gently.

Rockwell and Leatherhead came to the lair and brought even more medical supplies, including an old hospital bed with fresh bedding, to set in a corner of the lab, along with an IV stand, oxygen machine, defibrillator, more supplies. April and Karai wrapped Mikey's lower leg in plaster and the upper leg in thick gauze while Raph swiftly stitched the long wound in his shoulder and Donnie wrapped the smaller cuts on his right arm. Raph stitched the forehead wound and helped Don bandage that as well, then stood back and growled incoherently. He sat resolutely in one of the chairs surrounding the medical bed with the most stubborn glare he could muster. Leo merely nodded in approval. He patted Donnie's shoulder. His brother smiled at him in exhaustion. Leo didn't smile back. He had a dead father to yell at.

Leo paced the dojo, hands behind his back, sending out his aura again, calling Splinter's name, but the rat's spirit never showed. Leo gradually began to do katas, which dissipated his anger somewhat, but every time his hands moved in a manner similar to the mantras, he snarled. He didn't even really know what the damn Healing Hands actually did, and he instinctively used them on a brother's broken bone! He knew the mantras weren't supposed to be a panacea, but Splinter hadn't exactly prepared the boys beyond mentioning the technique when they were younger before using it during Karai's venom application under Shredder's control.

By the time Raph called him to dinner, he was sweating and still upset, and Splinter still had not appeared. Leo felt ready to cry. How dare he. How dare he die and leave them like this, with Leo as Sensei, uncertain and afraid and devastated, the youngest already buried under health problems that should never have touched him.

So tired.

His stomach tightened and grumbled, so he went to the pit and ate the pizzas April had gotten, barely tasting anything. In the distance he could hear the computers monitoring Mikey's vitals, the heartbeat slow but strong. He tried not to think too hard.

Raphael leaned forward and rubbed Mikey's hand in both of his, watching the bruises finally start to fade. It had been three weeks. Leo still looked like a stormcloud, upset with the absent ghost of Master Splinter. Donnie looked tired and frazzled. Not even visits from April, Casey, and Karai were helping. Raph just wanted to stab things. It wasn't like Mikey had gotten hurt during patrol or during a mission. No, he had tripped over a damn pipe in the sewer tunnels and fell into a pile of metal. There was nobody to blame.

He sighed, long and loud and utterly disgusted.

"Whatever it is, I didn't do it," came Mikey's sleepy voice, and Raph shouted, leaping up and squeezing Mikey's hand hard. Mikey blinked up at him, frowning, and asked "How come my leg hurts?" And Raph burst out laughing.

One of the medical junkyard marvels the Mutanimals had scrounged up and repaired was an old wheelchair, freshly padded and reworked from where it had been found randomly on a corner. It proved profoundly useful as Mikey insisted on trying to limp with a crutch and kept falling over, constantly off-balance from the head wound and forcing Donnie to strap his entire left arm to his chest to keep the shoulder wound healing well. Mikey would beg his brothers to scratch various itches from various healing wounds, which they refused to fall for, even when the youngest would pout and whimper "But Splinter would do it!"

Leonardo finally encountered his sensei's spirit in his room late one night, and after berating him for half an hour, did several breathing exercises while Splinter's ghost watched, ears low, silent. At that point, Leo had somewhat forgiven Splinter for now, and their conversation had turned to better ways to help keep the team – the family – connected and functioning. Somewhere in the discussion, Mikey's aura and mental voice joined them, jovially complaining that they were keeping him awake and that he was a poor injured boy who needed his rest. Leo simply closed his eyes and felt both his father and brother embrace him, auras wrapped tightly against him, and he smiled, at last content and happy. Everything would be okay. They would be all right as long as they were together.