So now it was official. Irreversibly, undoubtedly, unmistakably official. They were now officially a couple, their status revealed and known to all and everybody around. Well, everybody in the group that was. Chandler didn't think Monica had had time to tell her parents yet and so far he had felt no particular urge to inform his, especially since he couldn't imagine they'd really be interested. So everybody that actually took interest in this particular matter. Which was already more than enough as far as he was concerned.

Because it still felt so strange, even five days after that fateful Valentine's Day. Unsettling and almost disturbing. While their relationship had still been secret he had never really made the effort to imagine what it would be like once they were revealed. He'd just assumed that once the shock of the revelation died down it wouldn't be such a big deal anymore. They would just be a couple, a normal couple spending their free time together and everyone would know that they were together and that would be that. It would never have occurred to him that to get there would take more than a day or two at most. But here they were, the week following their reveal almost done, one day after their five months anniversary for crying out loud, and it STILL seemed a big deal. Too big for his liking.

If only … If only their friends would stop staring and gawping each and every blessed time he and Monica kissed in front of them, or doing a double take and even frown if they just held hands. Or grin and nudge each other whenever one of them dared to look tired in the morning or, god forbid, yawn. At times it seemed to him as if none of the others would ever get over the surprise of seeing them together. It was especially enervating because he had constantly to remind himself that while he and Monica had been together now for five months last Thursday and this Friday already concluded their 22nd week together, and were thus feeling quite settled and comfortable in their relationship already, the fact that they were a couple seemed still brand hot news to everyone else in their lives, news they apparently were completely unable to wrap their heads around, let alone adjust to the sight of them cuddling and making out every now and then. He really couldn't understand it. Had it been quite that bad when Ross and Rachel had dated? Admittedly those two had handled things a little differently – okay, a lot differently – but that couldn't really be the reason Ross and Rachel had been regarded as an established couple barely 24 hours after they finally got together while he and Monica were still constantly oohed and aahed over sooo long after their coming out. Even by Ross. Or make that especially by Ross. It seemed really strange, considering his white-hot frothing-at-the-mouth anger on discovering them how ridiculously sappy and sentimental he would become now whenever he caught them making out or even just holding hands. The only thing that snapped him out of his moist-eyed emotionalism was any indication that they were going to have sex. Since it was a sure-fire thing to get him to beat a hasty retreat, it was fortunate that they never had to pretend their inclinations in that area whenever they did want to get rid of him.

Though in all fairness all that annoying fuss seemed a small price to pay for being able to be out in the open and not having to hide and sneak around anymore. He suspected that he would miss the excitement and the fun of going behind everyone's back and playing with fire a little, but it was all sooo worth it – to be with Monica whenever he wanted, hold her close, spend every night with her from evening to morning, go to sleep beside her knowing he wouldn't be roused again in the dead of night just to drag himself back to his own bed in time, to not having to plan for every stolen minute with the constant fear of being found out hanging over their heads, and most of all, to be able treat her like his girlfriend in front of the others instead of just a friend. It made all the difference in the world.

He'd just have to be a little more patient with his friends. Put up with their endless teasing, grin and bear their ceaseless ribbing every blessed time he and Monica took their leave of them to go to bed, ignore Ross' scowls and grimaces alternating with sentimental dog-eyes, and most of all try to rein in all the sarcastic retorts that kept trying to escape from his mouth. After all, it wasn't as if this would go on forever. He was quite sure that all the excitement was bound to die down soon. Maybe even after this weekend already. He just had to keep his cool and hope for the best. And enjoy the advantages that new level of their relationship offered. One of which – the major one as far as he was concerned – being the fact that they could now devote so much more time and energy to their sex life. Where during their secret period they had had to cram everything into a few stolen hours in the dead of the night most of the times which, though always thrilling and big fun had also been rather exhausting and stressful in the long run, they now had much more leisure to explore and satisfy each other's desires and appetites in much more comfort too. Like last night when they had celebrated their five month anniversary in his bedroom, long after the others had gone to sleep. He hadn't been able to stop thinking about it all the next day, and even now on late Friday afternoon when they were all joined together in their usual place in Central Perk to ring in the weekend, at least half of his mind was still taken up with those sweet memories.

"Do you remember our last anniversary? The four month one?"

"Was that the one where we did it under the Christmas tree?"

"No! The one after that. When we remembered what had happened last year this time."

"Ah yes. When Phoebe had the triplets implanted –"

"And we switched apartments."

"Right. So?"

Monica pulled a little closer to him, until she was lying halfway over him, her face so close to his own that he felt her breath on his cheeks every time she exhaled.

"You told me that when you were back in your room, you had … fantasies. About me."

"Oh yeah. Guilty as charged. What about them?"

She smiled widely. "I'd like to know more. You know, more … details." She brushed her mouth across his and he immediately tried to capture her lips and elongate the kiss.

"What … what details?"

"Well, you know, how it went down in them. What actually happened. I mean, maybe it would be fun, if we could sort of – reenact them?"

Chandler blinked up at her. "Seriously? My fantasies? We're talking about my wet dreams of last year?"

"Yeah!" She pulled away slightly, her eyes sparkling. "We're already in the right room, so – why not?"

"Oh god. Um. Okay, but … I'm not sure I remember them really. It's been so long … and my sex life's hasn't exactly been the same since either, you know … "

"Just give it a try. You said you'd been thinking of me being naked in this room …"

Chandler let his hands slide down her back, cupping her breasts while he grinned at her goofily.

"Oh that. Yeah ... I think it's coming back to me now … Let's see … My favorite version was the one where I imagined that you had gotten so used to sleeping here that you would come back here late at night as if this still was your room and never notice your mistake."

"And you would be there?"

"Yes. I'd be asleep, but I would wake up when you came in. And I would never get the chance to say anything because you were already taking your clothes off."

"Oooh, I like that! All my clothes?"

He let his hands travel down to the small of her back, cupping her buttocks and rubbing his thumbs over her hip bones. "Yes. Quickly, but not too fast. And I'd be still sleepy, wondering if it was a dream, and if it would freak you out too much if I said anything, or if I would just have to let it happen … And I would already be on this side of the bed or else scoot over a bit, just before you took up the covers and lay down beside me."

"Mmmh. Like this?" She lay on her back again, her arms demurely crossed over her breasts. Chandler got up on one elbow and drew the covers over both of them.

"Umm – I think you had your back turned to me at first."

"Ooooh! Like this? And then?"

"I'd come closer … and I'd notice you touching yourself –"

"Mmmh, nice!"

"And you would breathe hard, and kinda moan, and I would reach out for you and put my hand on your hip – like that, and kinda stroke you, very softly …" He let his hand slide down her thigh and up again over the smooth curve of her hip, cupping her pelvis bone while stretching his fingers towards her groin, his fingertips gently feeling for her labia where her own hand was already busy.

"Ah… um … go on …"

"I'd get sort of close, snuggle up behind you and bend over you – you still wouldn't notice me, not really, not until I did this –", which was trailing kisses down her neck and shoulders to her breasts where he gently sucked on her nipples, "- then you'd start a little, and try to turn around, but I wouldn't let you. I'd hold you tight-", his finger had found her clitoris now and pressed down on it gently. They were both breathing harder now and when he pushed his erect penis between her legs she withdrew her hand to allow him access and grabbed at it, squeezing it gently between her fingers.

"Ummm … ahh … oh god … oh god … side- sideways, or …?"

"Well, sometimes … but mostly you, you would … ah, oh god – you turn on your stomach, and – ah, ah, aaahh – I'd do you from behind –", but she was already rubbing her buttocks frantically against his abdomen while he was still trying to hold her down and enter her at the same time without crushing her. It took some more fumbling and shifting, until they adjusted to each other and found their rhythm. He pressed his face against her neck, kissing and gently biting down on her shoulder while she panted and moaned under him, pumping her hips against his and softly screaming every time he pushed into her –

"Earth to Chandler! Helloo-ouu! Anybody home?!"

He did his best not to appear too startled, smiling vaguely at Phoebe. "Yes? Have we met?"

She grinned at him. "I bet I could tell exactly what you were thinking of right now!"

He tried to adopt a shocked expression. "You do?!"

"Of course! It's written all over your face!"

"Really? Huh. But then I guess it really could become a real problem. All those computers crashing …"

It worked. At least Phoebe was taken aback for as long as three seconds or maybe four. But on the other hand Monica now frowned up at him.

"What?"

"Computers …?"

He tried to look innocent. "That Y2K problem? Wasn't that what you meant?"

"What's 'why too – what?"

"Y2K. Year 2000. That's when all those computers will crash if they don't get reprogrammed. It's a huge problem at my work. Didn't you hear about it?"

Now they all exchanged puzzled glances and shrugs, and he found it hard to maintain his innocent façade when he really would have liked nothing better than to gloat and bask over his victory. But there was Monica to consider – Monica, who now looked at him searchingly with an almost undetectable smile and then gently nudged him in the ribs with her elbow.

"Oh, yes, I think there was this computer geek coming in and doing something with my computer …," Rachel said vaguely. "That could have been it." She turned to Ross who had just come in. "Ross, do you know about this Waytookey –"

"Y2K!" he prompted.

"Well, not directly, since I'm on sabbatical –," everyone groaned and rolled their eyes "but I read about it, of course. Do you think they can fix it in time?"

"So a few computers crash, what's the big deal?"

"Joey …!"

Ross opened his mouth to put him right and then changed his mind and headed for the bar instead to get some coffee. Chandler turned his head again only to meet Phoebe's pensive stare.

"So, what you're telling us is that you haven't been thinking about Monica at all in the last ten minutes? I find that hard to believe."

"Who said I wasn't? Of course I was thinking about Monica."

"Oh? But you said –"

"I guess I lied." He pulled Monica closer to him to kiss her on her head while Phoebe spluttered and then sighed resignedly. And when Monica smiled at him and leaned in for a kiss, it set off everybody oohing and awing once more to the same old tune and dance.

"Oooh, you guys! You look so … so cute!"

Chandler leaned back against the backrest, sighing deeply. Nope, didn't look like there'd ever be an end to this. The way it looked, it was likely to go on until next New Year's Eve when all the computers were bound to crash. Maybe that would distract them – although he wasn't prepared to bet on it.

Now Ross returned with his coffee. "Hey, you know what I just realized? If you guys ever have kids …"

That jolted him out of his gloomy musings. "Whoa-whoa-whoa! We're having kids?!"

Kids? As in babies? Who had factored that into the equations now? What had got into everybody?

"I call Godfather!"

Ross stared at Joey indignantly. "You can't just call Godfather. Don't you think her brother should be Godfather?"

"Sure, if you cared enough to call it first ..." Joey said sulkily.

Now Monica cut in, bless her. He had been beginning to think everybody was conspiring against him. "Guys, you're a few steps ahead of us!"

"Yeah, big zero gravity moon steps!" Oh the relief. As long as Monica took no part in this madness, they could all indulge in their fantasies as much as they wanted. Although he had to draw the line at babies -

"Oh! Oh, I just thought of the greatest wedding gift to get you!"

And weddings. Good sweet lord, now they were already thinking about weddings too? What was it that had women constantly think of weddings?

"Ooh, I'll go in on that with you! I couldn't think of anything." Phoebe too? Oh please, something to distract them now, before Monica changed her mind and started to chime in, just anything – ah, thank god. There was Joey's date, Katie, a tiny and rather cute girl, and, as it turned out, with a rather outgoing temperament.

"Ohh, I love Chinese! How did you know I love Chinese?!" And while she enthused about Joey's choice of food she kept pummeling him in the chest with her tiny little fists before she left for the bathroom. As Joey sat down again looking a bit shaken, Chandler sensed a smidgen of hope.

"She is so cute! You could fit her right in your little pocket!"

"She could fit in that little pocket inside the pocket." Both Phoebe and Rachel seemed quite taken with the little whirlwind, but Joey was starting to look decidedly uncomfortable.

"I don't know. I mean I like her a lot, and she's really nice, but…"

"But what?" Monica asked curiously, but Chandler had already realized the problem. He knew how much Joey hated to be pummeled and hit.

"She … she keeps punching me." That made them all laugh.

"In that cute, little, sweet way she just did?"

"Hey, it's a lot harder than it looks! Okay?" Now Joey was actually squirming. "She's – she's hurting me."

Under different circumstances Chandler might have commiserated with his roommate, but he just couldn't resist the temptation of turning the attention away from him and Monica, and besides, Joey was due a bit of teasing. Overdue in fact. Monica seemed to think so as well.

"I know what you need, you need a bodyguard. Hey Ross, what is Ben doing after preschool?"

"Hey listen, come on, Joey is having a problem!" Now Chandler was actually enjoying himself. "A little girl is beating him up!"

"Aww, Joey, come here." Rachel tenderly took his hand. "Look honey, I know this must be really, really difficult for you and I - Oh, I'm sorry. Am I hurting you?"

Fortunately Katie came back just as Joey seemed ready to explode. As he got up Chandler saw him deftly dodging a hearty cuff aimed at his midriff and again almost felt bad for his friend. But not for long.

Babies. Weddings. What in the world would even make them think of such things in relation to Monica and him? As long as Rachel and Ross had been together, no one in the group had even considered that they could get married any time soon, let alone teased them about it. Except Ross of course, who'd only succeeded in freaking Rachel out as soon as he brought it up. So why were they all doing it to him and Monica now and so soon after they'd revealed themselves as a couple? A couple who was so obviously still in the trial stage, fumbling its way around all the hurdles and pitfalls of maintaining their relationship from day to day, week to week. Hell, they weren't even living together yet. Why was everybody in such a frigging rush?

"Earth to Chandler ..." Monica said softly and smiled widely when he started up, jolted out of his broodings. When he looked down at her, into her steady blue gaze, he suddenly felt vastly relieved. Of course it was all just teasing. Just a bit of revenge for all the secrecy and sneaking around in the last five months, nothing more. The usual idiocies of that close knit group of theirs to whom teasing and ribbing had become an essential part of their interaction. Because who in their right mind could really picture them as a married couple with kids already, and so soon?

Not he for sure.