Summary: Everything is alright in Ace's life. His little brother doesn't have a love life – or a sex life for that matter. His friends are really supportive. His ex-boyfriend is not an asshole who broke his heart. And this so called asshole isn't coming back in town next week. Ace is neither sad nor angry. All his brothers are alright and accounted for. His father isn't some kind of criminal who left him to some kind of a grand father figure because he died. Ace doesn't have some kind of disease and he is not in denial about this. Everything is quite alright in Ace's life.

Notes: Hello readers !
I noticed that this fandom lacked Marco/Ace stories and decided to write my own !
It's going to be pretty angtsy, I prefer to warn you, but fluffiness will make it up to you ( at some point ^^)
English is not my first language so feel free to point out any mistake ( because there will be some and I'm sorry)
I'm searching for a beta, anyone interested ?
Anyway, on to the story !

Edit [07.09.2018] Updated (and totally re-written) to be better and less cringe-worthy and a bit more coherent with what's next. So it starts more "heavily" than previously but well... I think it introduces the story better. I'll get around to fixing the next few chapters ! [+ 3000 words]

Chapter 1: Get back on your feet

Ace gritted his teeth, his knuckles turning white, anger radiating from his entire being. What the fuck was going on? What the actual fuck was this man doing to his precious little brother? How dare he? He probably didn't know what happened to people who dare to think about defiling Luffy. Oh no, he didn't but Ace would teach him with his fists. But first, he needed to get him the hell away from his brother. To get Luffy away from the dirty paws of this damn guy who had burst into their lives uninvited. Only after that would he punch him in the face till it was just a bloody pulp.

Luffy's distinctive laugh rung in the room, pulling Ace out of his musings and making him focus on his younger sibling. His sweet, naïve brother who didn't know what he was getting into with a man like that. This guy was the definition of Tall Dark and Handsome – not that Ace found him handsome of course. He looked ridiculous with his goatee and mussed up hair. Ace didn't even know how he had met Luffy but he knew how those kind of guys were. Heartless assholes who would only hurt other people in their selfishness. Not on his watch, thank you very much.

"Shishishi ! Hello Ace!" Luffy greeted him with a beaming smile, still wrapped up in the bedsheet covers.

Ace should have taught him – or more likely hammered in his thick skull – not to trust strangers. Luffy was like Little Red Ridding Hood in front of this bastard of a Big Bad Wolf.

The older brother, who had been standing on the threshold for awhile, unable to move from the shock, suddenly rushed into the room and decided to take action. He grabbed Luffy's arm and jerked him away from the beast he was sitting next to.

Naked.

Stark naked.

Not even boxers on.

Nothing. Just skin. And huge dark marks marring his skin. Mosquito bites. For his sanity, it definitely was mosquito bites.

Ace felt both faint and incredibly furious and his grip slackened enough for Luffy to free himself.

"It's cold!" Luffy whined, turning around and making his way back to the bed. The beast still hadn't moved but was looking at Ace with a disinterested look. Not wanting his little brother to approach him again, Ace pushed him aside and threw himself at the still lying man, screaming bloody murder.

"You bastard ! What do you think you are doing to my brother!" He aimed a punch at the beast's face but the man got up quickly avoiding the attack.

"Hello there Ace-ya." The man drawled lazily. Was that a smirk Ace was seeing on his face? He was going to be sorry in a minute. Not one to let himself be overpowered by some naked beast, he threw another punch, intending to hit his target this time but was stopped yet another time. Luffy was standing between them – still naked – Ace's fist in his own hand, pouting.

"Ace." He whined a little. "What are you doing to Torao?" His nose scrunched up as he looked at Ace uncertainly.

"I – I'm going to punch him for dishonoring you!" He shouted furiously. "Let go of my hand Lu!" He struggled and managed to free his hand but Luffy was still standing between the two of them and was it his imagination or was the beast closer to his brother than before?

"Dis – Dishon - ..." Luffy trailed off, confusion swirling in his dark eyes.

The beast seemed unconcerned by what was happening, rubbing his eyes to chase the last dregs of sleep and suddenly, in a gesture that was almost natural, he wrapped the cover he was still holding by his waist around Luffy's, flushing them together under the bedsheet.

"Having sex." Law explained bluntly, tone almost bored, Luffy snuggling closer to him and even rubbing his cheek against his – definitely un-handsome – stubble.

A lull in the conversation followed. Ace didn't know what to do faced with such a scene. Not only the beast had defiled his brother, he was also flaunting the fact right in Ace's face? Admittely Ace wouldn't have had to, had he not entered the room uninvited but … so not the point right now.

"He asked." Law added, staring straight in his eyes, his smirk firmly in place. "To have sex." He elaborated, probably for Luffy's sake, in case he didn't understand what he was refering to. Ace's little brother wasn't really the brightest crayon in the box but he made it up with sweetness and determination.

"I asked." Luffy nodded finally, seemingly incredibly proud of himself.

Ace's eyes widdened comically. Nearly as much as those characters from the cartoons he used to watch with his brothers when they were youngers. He was floored and felt definitely fainter than before. He was going to faint. Or have an aneurism. Was he going mad ? He must be. Or else he was dreaming. He pinched his arm as hard as he could because that was what people did when they weren't sure that they were awake, didn't they?

Ouch.

Definitely awake. And feeling stupid under Law's judgmental gaze.

Ace looked at Luffy, wrapped in a single bedsheets, flushed against a despicable man and naked. He should have protected him better.

"You asked?" He stuttered in a toneless voice that contradicted his mental state.

"Well yeah!" Luffy exclaimed good naturaly. "I mean, I wanted to know what it felt! So I asked Torao to help me figure out why people did it!"

Oh. So it was only an experiment and the Beast had probably planted this devious idea in his precious little brother's brain. He had manipulated him. Of course.

"To help you out, you say?" He muttered darkly, regaining his senses, his anger surging forth once again.

"Yeah!"

"You took advantage of him, you bastard!" He screamed, attempting to throw yet another punch at the bastard's smarmy face. Law ducked and strategically placed a very confused Luffy in front of himself to avoid any further attack. He was as sly as he was a coward.

"Come here coward! You think I'll stand by idly when you're playing my little brother?"

"Luffy." Law began, his voice neither angry nor intimidated in the least. He was just cool – or maybe cold would be a better word to describe him. How a man like that could manipulate Luffy like this? Luffy who was rainbow and sunshine and puppies altogether. "He misunderstood. You should explain it properly."

"What? Why? I wanted to have sex and you said yes." He replied pouting, as if both Ace and Law were the slow ones.

"No Luffy-ya. It sounds like you were in search of a quick fuck." He explained patiently, more patiently than Ace would have expected coming from such a detached kind of guy.

"What's a quick fuck? Can you fuck someone quickly?" Luffy asked a bit naively, turning his head to look at Law's face and smashing his cheek on Law's chin harshly.

"No... Hn..." Law went on, unbothered by Luffy's clumsiness or by the pain that was probably radiating from his face. His little brother wasn't really delicate and had a rather high pain tolerance. "Well you can fuck someone quickly. But here it means something like a one night stand. Just to know what sex feels like, nothing more."

This conversation didn't make sense. Ace was dreaming. Even if his arm-pinching hadn't worked, he must be dreaming, there wasn't any other solution. He was totally out of his depth, lost in a sea of incomprehension. Luffy, his little brother, who was supposed to find a sweet girl to marry and raise a nice family with. Or even a sweet guy, Ace didn't care. Yet, he did care about this man. What he had seen of him, on the rare occasion he had met him had been enough. Except from his appearance, his personality was atrocious. He was cold and aloof, the complete opposite of his younger brother. He would tarnish his light, smother it till there was nothing left and Ace couldn't let that happen.

"Well I wanted to have sex with you." Luffy said.

A word like sex in Luffy's mouth was unbelievable. It seemed so vulgar. So strange. To Ace, Luffy was still a kid. A kid he had raised along with Sabo. A kid he had had to protect against bullies because Luffy had been a crybaby. His baby brother. What on earth happened? Was he at that age already? He was only like twenty one. Wasn't it too soon? Had Sabo already given him the bird and the bees talk? Ace hadn't. He couldn't imagine himself giving it to his pure innocent brother. Everyone talked about sex but it had never come up with Luffy. He had never seemed interested. He had even rejected the prettiest and smartest girl of the highschool. What was her name again ? It had something to do with snake... Anaconda? No... Ah yeah, Boa! Boa Hancock! Every guy in the highschool wanted to go out with her but she hated men. Except Luffy. She had thrown herself at him and he couldn't have cared less.

So why was Luffy seemingly interested in a guy now? Not that Ace was homophobic or anything, it would be sligthly hypocritical of himself. The thing was – or the problem was – with the guy in question. This Trafalgar Law was creepy as hell and he definitely didn't deserve Luffy.

"I know Luffy." Law went on, unaware of what was going on in Ace's mind. "And I wanted to have sex with you too. But why did you want to?"

"Hum... I heard it felt good. And it did!" His beaming smile was painful to look at as Ace felt his heart shatter at hearing his brother speak like that.

"Yeah but why did you want to have sex with me of all people?" Again, Law was patient, trying to coax Luffy into saying what he truly felt and not gloss over the details like he always did.

"That's a stupid question Torao!" He laughed and wrapped his arms around the beast's torso, a sappy grin brightning his face. "Of course it's because I like you!"

"And then... And then ! I found him naked in bed with this sorry excuse of a human being... This filthy bastard of a..." the rest was lost as Ace began to mumble and drink at the same time.

Sitting on a bar stool was Ace, slumped on the high table in front of him, drowning his sorrow in non-alcoholic drinks. His dark hair was falling in front of his eyes and he blew them away, annoyed at everything and especially at Law. Ace had exited the room as if in a dream, his legs feeling like jelly and his heart wanting to escape his chest. He had then slumped on the sofa only to text his friend Izo that something was wrong and to meet him at a bar. Ace had ran away from this vision of hell in which his little brother had a sex life with a creepy surgeon. He would wait to kill the beast in its sleep.

Said friend was currently sitting next to him, a drink in his hand, bored out of his mind. He attracted a lot of attention claded in a purple kimono adorned with some kind of pinkish wild flowers – "If you stand out then do it well," he often said. His chin was resting on his palm as he sipped his drink, listening to Ace rant.

"Yes, I understand your point but..." Izo drawled not ending his sentence, leaving it hanging. He probably didn't agree with Ace but he wouldn't say it. They were both walking on eggshells with each other this days.

Ace didn't even look up and went on.

"Those filthy paws on my baby brother..." He bemoaned again, slumping even further on the table in front of him. Soon he would become one with the wood.

The bar he had chosen was dimly lit but not too crowded yet, it was only eight at night and party-goers hadn't arrived yet. It was a rather nice place, in earthy and brown colors, the music was pleasant and not so loud that you had to shout to be heard – which was a real plus when you wanted to talk about the drama in your life.

He had called Izo because out of everyone he knew, he was the one who dealt the best with feelings and those kind of things but it was a bit strange to actually be here with him. It had been a long time since their last "night out" and maybe Ace shouldn't have called him. He could have rung Kid but he had felt like calling Izo. In retrospect, he definitely shouldn't have.

"You know, you called because you said you had a problem... but I don't think it qualifies as one..." Izo said, trying but failing to be as diplomatic as possible.

Before Ace could reply, Izo had put his hand in front of his friend's mouth to prevent him from spouting any more nonsense.

"I'm not saying that to antagonize you. I'm just trying to find a solution... And whining is not a solution..." He ended, as tactfully as he could.

Ace stayed silent but glared at his friend before sighing loudly.

"I'm not whining..." He said, letting his head slam on the table in a melodramatic way.

"You're going to lose the few neurons you have slamming your head like a drama queen..." Izo teased him, tone carefully neutral, and it seemed so natural, so normal to be on the receiving end of some teasing that it hurt.

"I'm not a drama queen!" He said, falling back on forgotten habits.

Izo arched one of his perfectly trimmed eyebrow but didn't elaborate. They both stayed silent, too uncomfortable to go on this way, not knowing where they could take it, not knowing if they would go too far and upset the other.

"Hello beautiful!" A deep voice chipped in, breaking a silence that was slowly becoming suffocating. "You look delightful tonight!"

"Hey hello Thatch." Izo smiled, relief clear on his face, turning around to greet his lover. The man bent down to kiss Izo lightly before taking a sit.

Since knowing Thatch, Ace had never seen him with his hair down. He always wore it in a truly strange pompadour which suited him but was so out-of-date that it was a bit painful to look at.

"Hi Thatch." Ace greeted him neutrally.

"Hello Ace." He greeted back, his smile somewhat strained but trying not to let it show. "Well what it is about love? You sent me a text message that you had to cancel our date because Ace had a problem..."

He didn't sound particularly accusing but maybe he was, Ace wasn't sure.

Izo laughed probably to ease the tension.

"Sorry. It's just that Ace caught Luffy having sex with this Law guy he has been hanging out with for awhile."

"You say that as if it's nothing!" Ace cried out.

"It kinda is Ace..." Izo said.

"Well Luffy is big enough to know what he wants so it's great he has found himself someone!" Thatch replied easily, sidding with his lover.

"What ?" Ace screeched. "It's my baby brother you're talking about! He's not ready..." Ace frowned thinking back on the events that had led him to this place. He shuddered just remembering it.

Izo sighed again and shock his head laughing lightly. "We know it's about your brother, you've been going at it since I'm here." He made a gesture to rest his hand on Ace's shoulder before retracting his hand. "But he's big enough to make his own choices, don't you agree?"

Izo might be onto something but Ace didn't agree. It left a bitter taste on his tongue and he resorted to glare at Izo, feeling too exhausted to prove why exactly he was right to worry.

"And Law isn't that bad." Izo finally said even if he had barely met the guy while he had hung out around Luffy, still pretending to be "just friends" with his baby brother. "He's a surgeon, he has his own appartement, he pays his bills, he is really clever, he's down to earth. That's totally what Luffy needs."

"What?" Ace screeched. "No! He needs nothing! And especially not him!"

"Oh come on, that's not because you screwed up your love life that you have to screw your brother's too." Thatch said and maybe it was a comment in passing but it hurt because it rung true and because it seemed that he had said it purposefully.

"Why are you bringing up my love life? It has nothing to do with anything." He replied frostily, bitterly, because how dare Thatch bring this up right now?

"Yeah sure." Thatch replied and Izo was trying to make his lover stop talking by pinching his hand under the table but to no avail. "You wouldn't be like that had this whole mess with Marco not occurred."

And that was too much. What exactly was Thatch accusing him of? The same old thing. Of fucking course. He thought that Ace was responsible for Marco and for this whole situation but he was wrong.

"Shut up, Thatch." He growled, looking mad. "You don't know anything so don't talk about things you know nothing about."

And now it was Thatch's turn to look mad and he replied as frostily as Ace

"If you would just explain then I wouldn't have to doubt..."

"Okay that's enough you too." Izo said, having given up on making Thatch shut up in a diplomatic –if painful way.

"Doubts?" Ace laughed bitterly. "That's priceless..." Marco was the one who left. And Thatch was one of those who had dropped out of his life right after – along with all of Marco's siblings, including Izo. They had even refused to let him know how to contact him. So screw him. Screw them all, he thought bitterly.

"Ace, calm down." Izo tried. "Sit down with us and let's talk about Luffy..."
Ace simply glared at Izo, mustering all the anger he felt. "Don't even try to sugar coat me with talking about my brother. You're probably thinking the same thing so don't bother." He spat out angrily, even if Izo had been the only one who had really tried to understand what had gone wrong back then and had come back. It didn't erase the past though.

Thatch was looking a bit guilty, probably thinking that he had lacked tact. Ace didn't care. Couldn't care less about what Thatch thought. Ace knew the truth and that was enough and maybe he should have told them all but he wasn't the angry-ex type, wanting to slander their ex-lover. Not that Marco wouldn't deserve it. It just wasn't his personality so he hadn't told anything to anyone and Marco probably hadn't either, that coward.

Izo was glaring at murder at his lover while mouthing what were probably threats.

"You don't know anything, both of you. So stop. Or better yet, ask him what really went wrong."

Thatch opened his mouth but Izo slammed his foot on his lover's making him wince in pain. He was probably going to tell him the same thing Izo had been trying to make him believe anyway. That Marco was hurting just as much... that they should talk it out. Yeah. They hadn't heard his ex-lover the last time they had talked... But Ace wasn't naïve nor was he stupid. Marco had obviously lied. He couldn't tell his own brothers how much of a bastard he had been. Yet Ace hadn't corrected any misconception. He didn't need their pity.

"Ace, I'm sorry, really... please sit back down and let's talk about something else." Izo pleaded, placing a calming hand on his shoulder.

Ace hadn't even realised he had gotten up in his anger but he didn't feel like sitting back down. He just wanted to leave or he would punch Thatch for being an insensitive asshole.

He had been trying to forget and it was working as much as it could. What need did Thatch have to bring it all up again? Ace didn't care about the bastard anymore even if Izo wanted him to at least talk to him.

"He's coming back." Thatch dropped out suddenly, still rubbing the foot that Izo had so mercilessly squashed under his shoe.

"Thatch!" Izo cried out in dissaproval.

"Well, he has a right to know, doesn't he? I honestly don't know what to think about everything Ace. I can't reconcile what I know with Marco's and your behaviour. I went a bit overboard but you're not giving me much to go from there." It was as much an apology as he would get from Thatch and it was as nice as it sucked. Back then, back when he was still with Marco, they had shared things, had been friends, had pranked people together.

"There's a time for everything..." Izo muttered. "But yes Marco is coming back in town. Father decided to retire and hand him his business so he needs to come back here. He'll be there on Friday." Izo explained because now that the cat was out of the bag it would be stupid to hide anything. Either way, Ace didn't care because he had put Marco behind him. Definitely.

"What does that have to do with me exactly ?" He yelled. "What huh ? I don't give a fuck about it!"

Anger was fine, anger was great to deal with unwanted emotion. So the bastard was back? What of it? It didn't have anything to do with him anymore. He had forsaken everything so screw him. Ace shrugged Izo's hand off his arm and stormed out, pushing people out of his way in his haste to get away, fists clenched and fuming.

"Congratulations, Thatch..." Izo sighed as Ace trudged through the crowd to get away from them. It was no use to go after him in this situation. He would cool off on his own. "Did you need to bring Marco up like that?"

"I didn't mean it to turn out like that. It just... got out of hand." Thatch replied sheepishly.

"Understatement of the century..."

"It's just that I don't understand anything about their situation and Marco's coming back so I just... I don't hate Ace or anything but I can't help but be wary. Marco left and..." He went on a bit guiltyly, running a hand through his hair, messing with his pompadour in his nervousness.

"So you just dropped the bomb in the most untactful way you could think of... I know that Marco left and I know that Haruta told us it wasn't pretty afterwards but look at Ace... Something went really wrong and the both of them won't talk about it..."

"Well I was trying to get him to talk..."

"You just made him mad. I can't even get mad at you..." Izo continued, shaking his head. He couldn't get mad at Thatch. His lover's bluntness was just part of him that he had accepted long ago.

"I just want Marco to be happy. And Ace too because he's a friend even if I was kind of a dick with him."

"You were." Izo agreed.

"Don't sweeten the blow, love..." Thatch muttered.

"We don't even know what exactly happened between them, just that they stopped dating and ended up miserable and hating each other... It's driving me crazy..." Said Izo, misery clear in his voice. "Both are hurting so much... I wish I knew what happened."

"So do I." Thatch agreed whole heartedhly.

"Getting Marco to talk is like pulling teeth and Ace is even worse." Izo complained, stirring his cocktail with his straw, looking in the depth of his drink as if it held the solution.

"I know..."

"I don't really know what to do but I'll think of something. I can't let this situation go on. Give me some time and I'll get Marco to spill everything. With him back in town it will be easier than with Skype."

"Yeah, this way he can't hang up on you..." Thatch snickered.

"Hush. I tried. If it doesn't work, I'll just get him drunk."

"I trust you with that then." Thatch nodded and then went on a bit uncertainly. "Do you... do you think I should go and see Ace to apologize?"

"I don't think he's in the right state of mind for that. You antagonized him pretty harshly. You could have been kinder. I told you that it had been hard on him too."

"I know..."

"Let's hope everything will turn out alright." Izo said, finally taking a huge gulp of his drink, letting the taste of alcohol fill his mouth.

Izo would go see his friend the next day to assess the damage Thatch had done. When Marco and Ace had broken up, Izo hadn't been the friend he should have been, thinking that Ace had broken his brother's heart. Yet, it had seemed strange especially when he had seen Ace again, seen how miserable he had been. Since then Izo had been trying his best to be friend with him again, but the past was hanging over both of their heads rather heavily.

Anyway, going after him now was begging for a huge argument so he would bid his time.

The cold air could have helped him cool down but Ace so furious that it did absolutely nothing. Winter was drawing near but hadn't settled in yet and the weather was still fine for the month of October. The young man was fuming. It was a wonder that his mood could drop from one extreme to another so quickly. Depressed and then suddenly angry.

That stupid Thatch. Bringing his "love life" up as if it was nothing. As if all of it was his fault. As if he was to blame for his own fucking break up. Just thinking about it made him want to go back and punch Thatch across the face. Why was he butting in? It didn't concern him. He should just back off.

In his haste he almost trampled over a small child that had let go of his father's hand. He apologized profusely before stomping on. He hadn't been raised in a barn, he knew how to be polite even when he wanted to scream his anger at the world. He really needed to calm down. Or to punch something. Yet he wasn't the kind of cliché guy who would hit a tree just to vent. He had some dignity left.

A gust of wind ruffled his hair, making some fallen leaves flutters aloft. Ace felt a tear gather at the corner of his eye but he closed it quickly. Damn wind. He had sensitive eyes, nothing wrong with it. It wasn't a real tear. He had shed enough tears anyway, he wouldn't shed another single one for this. He wasn't some whimp. Everything was in the past, he had moved on, he didn't care.

He didn't know where his feet where taking him but he needed to walk around. He had always liked walking to clear his mind, it kept his body occupied as his thoughts were swirling in his mind like crazy. It wasn't late yet and he wasn't in a shady neighborhood so it was fine. If he got too far, he could always take the bus to go back home.

Marco, huh. That bastard. That fucking bastard. His name was like a curse on Ace's tongue and in his mind. It hurt just to think about him. It was suffocating. Why was he unable to stop thinking about it? Taking a shaky breath he tried to think about something else. Anything. He began to count his steps, looking at the ground to see where it was uneven, looked at the trees and listened to the wind but it was no use. His thoughts inevitably went back to the problem at hand. To Marco. Even if it was over and had been for years. He wanted to just forget. Yet it seemed impossible.

No it's not, he admonished himself, slapping his cheeks to wake the fuck up. There was no need to dwell on the past. He had moved on. Definitely. He had to let it go. To think about something else. Something more important: the murder of one Traflagar D. Water Law. Such a stupid name. Did his parents had that bad of a sense of humor?

Ace couldn't fathom what his brother saw in this kind of man. They had known each other for awhile but they hadn't been a couple last time Ace had checked. Law always seemed bothered by Luffy who usually clinged to him like a koala on a tree. When had their relationship evolved into this? Ace didn't have a single clue. But back to the problem, why had that changed? What did Luffy see in this guy? Sure the guy worked. Sure he was clever, being a surgeon at twenty six and all. Sure he had his own appartement. Either way, he sure was creepy as hell. Had you looked at the shadows under his eyes? For all Ace knew this Law could be a vampire! And he had the complexion to go with the I-am-a-vampire-package. Yeah Ace was sure of it. This Traflagar was after his sweet little brother blood.

A wry smile stretched his lips. What was he thinking ? Vampire didn't exist. He shook his head. He definitely shouldn't hold such a grudge against Trafalgar but he couldn't help it. What if Luffy got hurt because of this man? Love hurts. He knew what he was talking about...

Oh stop right there, he admonished himself again and this time it wasn't his voice in his head but Sabo's. His brother had always been the cleverer of the two after all... Think about Luffy. Don't think about anything else. Don't let your thoughts stray to other topics. Luffy, his sweet little brother...

They weren't related by blood but by some really strange circumstances they had been raised together. Luffy's grandfather, Garp, was the city's police chief. Had been for quite a while. Ace's own father – as much as he despised even thinking about that man as his father – had been a criminal. An important one. The Al Capone of his time. The king of them all. He had been caught by Garp as he was dying because of some trap he had fallen into. He had pleaded the police chief to take care of his only son as his wife had given birth just a few days ago and had died. And Garp, being as chivalarous as he was and despite all his shortcomings, had accepted and Ace and Luffy were raised as brothers.

And the rest was history.

Well it had started badly as Ace was really a brat at that time but little by little they had grown close to each other. Thanks to Sabo... His second brother... A huge wave of sadness suddenly overwhelmed him and he had to fight back his tears. Real ones this time and he wasn't ashamed of them. His heart was squeezing painfuly in his chest.

Ace needed someone to talk to talk to, someone who could understand, who would help him. The ache in his heart was always there but right now, right now it was just incredibly painful. He needed Sabo. Yet, Sabo wasn't here. He hadn't been for more than two years.

Ace looked at the dark sky and closed his eyes. To fight back his tears or to keep reality at bay – maybe both at once. It was hard. Life was hard, harsh and sometimes cruel. Yet he had to live on, hoping that someday things would look up, that he would feel happiness and maybe that someone would love him, truly. He had to hang on this hope, that he was alive for a reason, that he was worth something despite being the son of a criminal.

Luffy told him so but Luffy was a naive kid. Not meant to love someone like him. Ace didn't even know what he had done to deserve such a perfect little brother. Despite his clumsiness, Ace loved him from the bottom of his heart. He would go to hell and back for him. Fight grizzly if need be. Protect him from everything that could harm him. Including this Trafalgar Law. He knew that he had overreacted but he couldn't help it. Thatch had implied that it was because of his own experience. It might be true. Or maybe he just couldn't imagine Luffy leaving the nest and leaving him behind. Would it mean that he wouldn't be Luffy's number one? That Luffy wouldn't be Ace's number one anymore. Yet Luffy always would be. He was his ball of sunshine. His family. Family doesn't leave you and no one could take it away. No one but Death itself, he thought bitterly.

He looked at his watch and noticed it was close to ten now. He had walked around for a long while but he still recognized the neighborhood. He probably had walked in circle.

Now that he had stopped he felt tiredness settle in his bones. He was exhausted, he needed to crash somewhere and sleep. He needed to give his brain a break. But where could he go? He didn't want to go back to his flat, didn't want to stumble upon another scene not meant for his eyes. He had seen enough. So where to then? He couldn't go back to Izo's, he lived with Thatch and anyway Ace didn't want to see them right now. He might say hurtful things and he might hear worse. They were Marco's brothers before being his friends. Anyway, he could go and sleep at his tattoo parlor but it would raise questions from his employees. Question that he didn't want to answer. Where then ?

He resumed his wandering, walking slower than before, drifting aimlessly in the city. He didn't know. He would let his feet lead the way. It was dark and it was getting chilly but it wasn't cold yet so it was fine. The street lights were so bright it hurt his eyes and the noises of the cars on the road hurt his ears. He needed to go to some place quiet.

How pitiful was he? Wallowing in self pity? He didn't have it that bad. His life wasn't that bad. He had a loving little brother, a job as a tattoo artist that he loved, a few friends that he enjoyed spending time with. He was young, had his life before him. Yet he was burdened by too many things.

First, by his name, Gol D Ace. A cursed name. He had taken his mother surname, Portgas. He didn't want to be related to his shitty dad. Such a failure at life. He hated him so much. People had despised him because he was the son of a monster. They thought he was a monster too. Maybe they weren't wrong. He was also burdened by his own feelings, and he felt weak for that. This overwhelming sadness that clouded his mind made him weak and pathetic. How easier would it be to just live without feeling anything? After two years, two whole years, his heart still clenched just thinking about that man. Just thinking about what they had. About what they could have right now. But no. It was just a useless dream. Something not meant to be. Marco had told him so. That it was over. That he never loved him. Yeah. He never had, had he? But Ace had given him his heart. And never got it back. How pathetic could he be now? You can't give your heart to someone except if you are dead. Cause you need a heart to stay alive. Was that why his world was so grey? Because he wasn't alive anymore?

You're pathetic, he scolded himself and this time it was his own voice. He was his best critic after all. You shouldn't dwell on the past. It's not you. You're strong. Stronger than this, aren't you? But he felt broken, shattered beyond repair and he didn't know how he could mend it. Sabo would have known but Sabo wasn't here. Anger overtook him. Sabo had left him too. He had left him to deal with this life. Alone. But he didn't leave because he wanted to, he argued with himself. It was an accident! He would never have left you otherwise. He still had though.

It was now close to ten thirty and here he was, standing before this huge, grey building he knew so well. It appeared eerie in the half-light cast by the street lamps. The sliding doors let out a ray of artificial light on the pavement, strangely looking like the open mouth of a starved monster.

So that was where his foot had taken him. Unbelievable. A strange laugh escaped his throat, more of a small whimper than a real laugh. The hospital. He was at the hospital.

He entered through the ER, it was always open even at this time of the night. A tired looking nurse was sitting behind the desk. He was going through some files, bitting on the end of a pencil that was probably leaking as he had blue ink on his lips. He rose his head as he heard Ace getting closer and smiled at him. They knew each other after all, Ace came here quite a lot. Normally, people weren't allowed to roam inside the hospital at night but he was the grand child of Garp, the police chief. It had its perks. Namely being able to come here whenever he wanted to because apparently Garp was friend with the director of this place or whatever. Ace couldn't care less.

He made a small hand motion toward the nurse – Hector if he remembered well but he wasn't sure – and went past him, directly heading for the corridor on the left which would lead him to the elevators. He didn't want to chitchat.

He soon was on the right floor and he made his way as quietly as possible to where he wanted to go. Patients were probably already sleeping and he didn't want to stumble upon anyone, especially Trafalgar. The man worked here after all. The floor was squeaking slightly under his shoes and he tried to lighten his steps as much as possible. Wandering in a hospital at night was really strange if not disturbing. There wasn't any light on except those little sticks at the bottom of the walls which cast yellowish halos on the ground.

Finally he arrived in front of room 431. A room he knew all too well. He didn't even have to open the door to know what was behind it. A small bed with white sheets, white walls, a table stuck in a corner, a greyish plastic chair, two armchairs near the small window on the left and a door leading to a bathroom the patient never used. And flowers on the bedside table. They were the only touch of color in this otherwise depressing room. They were the color of the sky. Forget-Me-Not. They were Ace's favorite because the name was poetic and encompassed what he felt for the man lying in the bed. It was both a plea not to be forgotten and a vow never to forget about him.

His hand shook slighlty as he gripped the handle but he pushed through and opened it. Crossing the room in four strides he sat on the chair next to the bed and took the motionless hand of his friend and brother in his own.

"Hello Sabo" He whispered. "How are you? I know it's late. I know but... I needed to see you."

Ace let his eyes drop to his knees, not looking at his brother anymore. He felt so overwhelmed by everything that was happening around him all of a sudden. It was suffocating. Only because they had talked about that man. A man he was trying his hardest to forget about but was too damn weak to actually do so.

"Well..." His voice broke and a sob escaped him, at last. He had fought back against his tears all night along not willing to be any weaker and more pathetic than he already was. But here he was, alone with his brother and he could let himself go, let his feelings show. Yet he also needed to be strong. He owed it to Sabo.

"Luffy has a boyfriend now." He started, a fake smile stretching his lips. Nevermind that, his brother's eyes were closed. Had been closed for more than two years, he needed to smile. Needed to pretend that everything was fine, was going to be fine. "He's a surgeon. Trafalgar Law. You don't know him. He is creepy as hell..." A croaky laugh escaped his lips. "I stumbled upon them in Luffy's bed and they were both naked. Can you imagine it? Someone is crazy enough to date our Luffy. I almost killed him on the spot. The surgeon. Not Luffy. I hope he's someone nice enough. We'll see. If he hurts Luffy, I'll kill him, don't worry."

He squeezed his brother's hand reveling in the feeling it gave him to hold this warm palm in his own. This warmth meant the world to Ace. He let silence envelop the room and took in his resting brother. He was so thin and his skin was so pale, it would soon become see-through at this point... The beeping sound of the heart monitor was maddening in the silence but it was the difference between life and death so Ace couldn't complain. "And I'll punch Thatch too. Because he is a jerk." A wry smile stretched his lips. "Ah I should tell you the whole story before insulting people. You would have scolded me but Thatch was a dick so maybe you'd have punched him too. People always things you're calmer but well, I know better... Anyway Marco's coming back. Yeah Marco. I already told you what happened back then. When you were still ali.." Ace's voice broke. "I mean, awake. Awake, yeah." He took a few shuddering breath, squeezing Sabo's hand as if it was his lifeline. "Anyway... Marco's back and... My feelings are a mess... I hate him. I truly do. And yet it hurts so much... so much and I can't make it hurt less. It's as if there's still this gapping wound in my chest. It hasn't healed in two fucking years and I'm sick and tired of it..."

A mirthless laugh escaped him.

"It ever stopped hurting but it had dulled. At least a bit and now... hearing his name and knowing that I might run into him... it's the worst thing I've ever felt. What should I do? I dont wanna run away... I – I'm not the one in the wrong but I don't what I'd do if I see him. I don't. I want the hurt to stop, you know? I'm done with this..." He choked and took a shaky breath, crushing Sabo's hand in his own, not that his brother could feel it.. "How I wish you were here to give me some advice... Sabo..."

Silence encompassed the room again and this time it was broken by Ace's sporadic intake of breath. Silent tears were freely streaming down his face now. He couldn't contain them anymore.

"Fuck it." He cursed, wipping his eyes angrily, rubbing his cheek to dry them. "Why can't I be strong like I used to be? I'm pathetic! So damn pathetic. Running to my brother for help because I can't fucking move on!" Ace stood up and made his way to the window to calm down.

There was no one oustide the hospital. It was now close to eleven or maybe even later, Ace's sense of time was a bit screwed up. People were probably asleep, watching Tv or maybe they were up to no good, who knows. Sometimes the headlights of a car would break through the thick darkness cast by the night, illuminating the otherwise black sky. There was no stars. Maybe they were hidden by the clouds or maybe you couldn't see them because you were in the city. Either way, the landscape from this window looked incredibly grim and it was jarring, this contrast between the darkness outside and the pure white of this room. Everything outside was black or grey and massive. Rows of buildings upon buildings obstructing the view. Some trees here and there would bring a touch of green in daylight but took a far scarier edge at night, moving their branches as if possessed. Two tiny sidewalks framed the large road. It felt like a ghost city as if it was devoided of any human beings.

Sighing, Ace sat back next to his brother and let his head fall back, staring at the white ceiling. Everything was so messed up. Soon his eyes shut and he fell into a restless sleep.

Notes: I hope you liked it ! Tell me if I should continue or if my english is awful ... ^^

Update will be - I hope - once a week or every other week

See you next chapter !