Summary:

No one but Zuko and Katara knows what really happened in the crystal cave or why his betrayal hit her so hard. Unable to sit through one more lecture about how she ought to forgive Zuko, Katara strikes off on her own for a time. When she returns to the group with a fresh perspective, Katara begins to see the Fire Nation prince with new eyes. Zuko is determined to make up for the past with maybe a little assistance from fate and Toph. S03, starting the day Zuko and Sokka leave for Boiling Rock. [AU]. Zutara, Sukka, and others.

Disclaimer: I do not own Avatar: the Last Airbender or any of the characters thereof.

Chapter: Learning To Be Selfish

"Of all the sanctimonious, unsympathetic, ungrateful, biased…" Katara angrily muttered to herself as she marched over to the fountain where piles of laundry waited for her. She was so frustrated and preoccupied, she completely missed the earthbender leaning against the fountain basin.

"Sweetness! Watch where you're stomping," Toph interrupted Katara's irate muttering. "You nearly trampled me. Why don't you sit down? I need to talk to you."

Only feeling slightly guilty for practically stepping on her friend, Katara blew her breath out between her teeth in irritation. "I am in no mood to be lectured by someone else about how I 'need to be more forgiving'! Aang has already made his feelings on the subject abundantly clear."

"Come on now. Would I lecture you? Particularly, after Twinkletoes has just wound you up?" Toph said coaxingly.

Katara had been a bundle of nerves since the arrival of the Fire Nation Prince. Toph, who had certainly been on the receiving end of Katara's short temper, had never seen the girl so worked up for such a sustained period of time.

Deflating suddenly, Katara apologized, "I'm sorry, Toph… I just feel so angry all of the time, these days."

"That's what I want you to talk about. Vent, woman!" Toph interjected.

After a long pause, Katara burst forth, "I am going out of my mind! I'm not sleeping. I'm moody and withdrawn. I am becoming someone I can't stand! I can't believe I am letting myself become this for that jerk!"

Taking a breath, Katara continued defeatedly, "I feel like I'm just hurting the group and impeding the mission. I know I'm a terror to be around at the moment. Aang knows his waterbending well enough now. It is not like I am necessary anymore. Maybe I should take some time to figure myself out and keep out of his way."

Toph, who was a big believer in practical selfishness, sighed with relief. Finally, the older girl wasn't just mechanically looking after everyone. In the most serious tone, Katara had ever heard her use, Toph replied, "Katara, I know you think Sparky is trouble. I also know nothing I can say will change your mind. I think you should get away. Not just from Sparky, but from all of us! You can't take care of yourself if you are too busy taking care of the rest of us."

Katara looked up at her sharply, hurt in her eyes. "Not that I don't appreciate it!" Toph assured her. "You are the only one who can cook anything edible. But maybe it is time we learned to struggle a bit without you."

"So you don't want me around anymore either?" Katara asked, feeling her heart plummet. She really had driven away her friends.

"Of course I do! I would actually miss you quite a lot. You are my first female friend." Katara looked up again from dejectedly staring at her lap. She felt a wave of warmth and affection for the shorter girl.

Hugging Toph hard, Katara said, "I would miss you too. Am I just being selfish?"

Toph was actually quite pleased by the return of Katara's demonstrative affectionate nature. "In my opinion, you could use a bit more selfishness, Sugar Queen. Listen, Snoozles and Sparky are gone hunting for a bit, why not leave while they are away? That way your brother isn't pestering you with a million questions. I'll look after Twinkletoes.

"Maybe you could find some new people on this island and talk to them about your problems?" As you won't tell any of us what the real deal is with you and Princey, Toph added silently.

"I told you about how having tea with that old guy in the woods sorted me out when I was having troubles. Maybe you will find another stranger like Pops who can give you some nice sound advice?"

Getting excited, Katara replied, "I think I will! I should do this. I will leave tonight while the moon is waxing towards full!"

"Wait, wait, hold your ostrich horses. How will you find us if we need to move on while you're gone? I think we may need to think this through a bit more." Toph was glad that Katara was willing to take her suggestion but leaving that night was a bit hasty.

"Don't worry. I will always be able to find you… call it waterbender's intuition," Katara tried to mollify her friend, a slight smile playing about her lips.

Still looking unconvinced, Toph replied, "Alright... You seem pretty confident. How long do you think you will be gone? Or is this a permanent excursion?"

Thinking rapidly, Katara did a little math, "Hmm… Given our location… I will be back before the third full moon, so about 9 weeks. Tell Sokka that I went walkabout. He will understand."

Toph shook her head. "Walkabout? Water Tribe. You all are so literal."

Katara shrugged. "What can I say? We like to call a thing what it is."

"Where are you planning to go? Into the woods?"

"No, into the sea."

A/N:

In my head canon, the series plays out over three and a half years to give all the characters more time to move from place to place and grow up. I start everyone out a year younger to avoid them being too old by the arrival of Sozin's Comet. Ba Sing Se takes place at the end of year two allowing for an 18-month spread for the final season. This allows me to insert more plot where I want without completely destroying the overall plot structure of the show.

I should also mention that Katara and Zuko were imprisoned in the crystal cavern for a week in this story. I will narrate their time there as a flashback later on. I will also allude to it throughout. I have prewritten that section to ensure plotline consistency.

I am making some non-canon choices about the different nations' cultures which will become apparent as the story progresses.

The story will change perspectives as needed. It will follow both Zuko and Katara closely, but I can't resist Toph, Suki, or Sokka.

To fans of Mai, I apologize in advance. I don't hate her, my soul just belongs to good ship Zutara.