A/N: Alright another challenge fic by Tempestt. Here is the challenge and the summary for my fic basically:

When Buffy dies at the end of The Gift she doesn't go to heaven or hell. Instead her ghostly ass gets chained to Spike. He can't see or hear her, but she witnesses everything he does. She sees his near suicidal misery and Dawn's concern for him. She sees him slowly pull himself together, but only because Dawn needs him. Through Spike's interaction with the Scoobies, Buffy sees how Tara becomes a maternal figure for Dawn while the others are lost in their grief. Spike becomes a surrogate big brother who teaches Dawn things that Buffy feels are completely inappropriate such as cheating at poker, picking locks, hotwiring a car, pool hustling, how to threaten a handsy boy with a switchblade. As the summer progresses she realizes that in his own twisted way, Spike is trying to teach Dawn to survive.

When Buffy is resurrected she isn't apathetic or angry because she wasn't in heaven, but she does see Spike in a new light. After spending 147 days entirely in his company, she finds herself craving his presence and a relationship grows between them. The scoobies react terribly and it comes to a head when she admits to being a ghost and seeing how much Dawn was pushed off onto Spike and how he cared for her.

I'd like to see Dawn being 'adopted' by a small part of the demon community, IE Spike's poker buddies.

An interlude just before Buffy gets resurrected where Spike tries to be intimate with a female demon but ends up breaking down entirely. The woman, knowing Spike was in love with the slayer (I can only imagine something like that would be huge gossip in Sunnydale) is sympathetic. A slightly jealous, but repressing Buffy who is witnessing the entire event finally comes to the conclusion that demons really can love, because the depth of his despair wouldn't be possible otherwise.

Story Warnings: Swearing, Drinking, Violence, Scoobie Hating, Sexual Situations, one small vague rape scene and Flashbacks of Torture.

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Chapter 1

Day 1

Buffy stood there looking around at her friends. She couldn't figure out what the hell their problem was. Everyone was alive, they all made it, they won. Yet everyone had these long and sad faces on them. She didn't get it.

"Guys, what the hell? We won. It's happy celebration time at the Bronze." Buffy said, but she was ignored.

They were all standing there looking down at something on some pile of rocks. Buffy was annoyed by the way her friends were acting so she went over to see what the hell everyone's problem was. She instantly frozen when she saw herself laying down on the pile of rocks. Buffy stood there in shock at seeing herself. She didn't understand what was happening, but that wasn't her. She wasn't dead. She was standing here alive. Something was wrong. Some kind of spell or something, because she wasn't dead. She couldn't be dead.

"That's not me. Guys that's not me." Buffy said, but once again she was ignored.

Buffy went over to Dawn and grabbed her only for her hands to go right through Dawn.

"What?" Buffy said confused.

"I can't believe she's really gone." Willow said softly with tears going down her face.

"I'm not gone Will. Come on you gotta be able to feel me here. You're a witch for crying out loud." Buffy said frustrated that no one seemed to be able to feel her around.

"She died for me. She wouldn't let me jump." Dawn said with tears going down her cheeks.

"It's my job to protect the world Dawnie, not yours. I would do it again, every time." Buffy said sadly at the sight of Dawn standing there all on her own.

That's when Buffy noticed that someone was missing. She didn't see Spike anywhere. She didn't know what happened to him during the fight, but she didn't think he would die. Buffy turned and scanned the area and she saw Spike barely walking towards the group. His face was covered in blood and his right leg looked shattered. He couldn't even stand on it. Buffy couldn't help, but go over to him as he collapsed on the ground. His eyes were still locked on her body there on the pile of rocks.

"Spike, what happened to you? How did you get this injured? Everyone else barely has a scratch on them. You're the best fighter besides me. How the hell did you get this hurt?" Buffy asked shocked at the level of injury Spike had from a fight against a group of followers.

Buffy didn't get an answer as even Spike couldn't hear her. She was shocked all over again when he broke down in tears at her death. Buffy was shocked silent. She had never seen a man break down like this ever in her life, much less a soulless vampire. She didn't know what to say to him, even if he could hear her. Buffy found herself reaching out to touch him, but remembering part way that her hand would just go straight through him. Buffy stayed there bent down in front of Spike just watching as he cried his heart out all over her death. She looked back at the others and saw that they were only shedding a few tears. Dawn was crying the most and no one was even holding her. She stood there crying all on her own, just like Spike was.

"Why aren't they hugging her? Why aren't they coming over here to make sure Spike is okay?" Buffy said to herself as she was the only one that could hear her voice.

After a few moments Giles cleared his voice and spoke.

"We need to get out of this area before anyone shows up."

"Ya" Xander said with a distant voice.

He slowly went over to Buffy's body and picked her up bridal style. Tara and Willow walked holding onto each other. Giles and Anya walked closer to each other with Dawn off to the side of Tara and Willow. Xander walked a little ahead of them.

"Wait, someone has to help Spike." Buffy said after the group. She chased after them, but once she got so far she hit an invisible wall. "What the hell?" Buffy said as she tried to keep walking, but she just couldn't no matter what she did. "Great so what I'm stuck here? I get to haunt the place that I died in forever?" Buffy asked confused and annoyed.

Buffy couldn't do anything, but stand there watching as her friends and her body got further and further away. Once she couldn't see them anymore she turned around to look at Spike. She didn't know how injured he was, but she did know that with his leg broken he wouldn't be able to go that far on his own. He was still crying and Buffy didn't know what to do. She went over and placed her hands on her hips.

"Come on Spike stop it. You need to get up and get your ass to your crypt. You have blood there, blood will make it better. You need to get up. You promised me you would protect her until the end of the world. Well guess what the end of the world didn't happen tonight so get up. You always keep your promises now get up." Buffy ordered, but of course had no effect on Spike.

Buffy let out an annoyed huff before she sat down on a rock.

"Great I can't touch anyone or even have them hear me, but yet somehow I can sit down on things. That makes no sense. Do you hear me world? That makes no sense!" Buffy yelled beyond frustrated.

Buffy crossed her arms and sat there with nothing else to do, but to listen to Spike's heart wrenching sobs for the next hour. When Spike finally pulled himself together he let out a shaky breath. Buffy watched as Spike slowly pushed himself up into a standing position, but he didn't last long. His body collapsed back down. Buffy let out a sympathetic moan at the level of pain Spike must have been in. She watched again as Spike stood half way up and stumble a few steps before falling down again. Buffy got up and walked over to Spike as he got back up. She knew she couldn't touch him or even walk with him. She would be at the end of her leash here in a minute, but she felt like she owed it to him to at least walk beside him. Even if she couldn't help him, she owed him that much. Spike stumbled into a building and he used that to hold himself up as he worked his way down. Buffy followed right beside him and was shocked that she was able to walk further than she had when her friends left. For the next forty minutes she walked beside Spike and was amazed at how many times his body collapsed, but he just got right back up. The problem was he had only managed to go five blocks in the forty minutes. At this rate he wasn't going to be able to make it back to his crypt in time for sunrise that was thirty minutes away and ticking.

Spike collapsed again and this time to Buffy's horror he threw up blood on the ground. Buffy didn't even know that vampires could throw up. Spike sat back and with a shaky hand moved his shirt up and Buffy couldn't believe the level of damage done to his stomach and chest. His whole torso was black and blue. She could see six different ribs poking through his skin and more broken inward. Buffy bent down with hurt all over her face. This level of damage was almost as bad as when Glory beat the hell out of him. Buffy's mind was racing trying to think of when Glory could have gotten to Spike, but she didn't. They were the ones fighting the whole time.

"How did this happen Spike?" Buffy asked softly.

"Bloody fall off that tower nearly killed me. I wish it had." Spike said softly.

"You can hear me?" Buffy asked with hopefulness in her voice.

"Got four organs completely destroyed gonna take months to grow back on the swine I'm drinkin'. Months of constant pain. What I deserve after failing her." Spike said with a great pain in his voice and Buffy knew that he hadn't actually heard her, but was just talking to himself.

"Spike I don't know what happened, but you didn't fail me. You fell off the tower getting to Dawn that's how you got so injured. Somehow you got thrown off, because you tried to get to Dawn. That guy that was up there with Dawn, you must have fought him and got thrown off." Buffy said as she realised how Spike was injured.

Spike took a shaky breath before he pushed himself to stand up and slowly make his way down the street once again. Buffy could see that he was getting weaker and weaker as he went on. Buffy watched as Spike finally made it to a payphone as the sun was rising in the sky. He collapsed onto it as he picked up the receiver and put two quarters in and dialed. Buffy waited to see who he was calling.

"Clem, I need you to pick me up. Eight and Main, I'll be in the building. Bring a blanket." Spike hung up the phone before he spoke to himself. "Hopefully he gets that soon. No clouds today."

Spike went over to one of the abandoned buildings that were on the corner. He broke the handle and stumbled inside. Buffy went with him inside and saw that there was windows all around the room except for this small corner in the room. It looked like it was just used as storage when this place was even open. It wasn't much bigger than the size of her living room. Spike went over to the corner where there was no windows and collapsed down to the ground. He was shaking and breathing heavy. He removed his jacket and covered himself up to his chest with it. He sat back and closed his eyes to try and get the pain under control.

"Why did they leave you?" Buffy asked as she sat down on an old wooden crate. "I mean I know they were in shock and not thinking clearly, but you came with us. How could they not look for you? If I hadn't died though, would I have looked for you? I'd like to think I would, but maybe I wouldn't have. Maybe it wouldn't have crossed my mind like it didn't theirs. You're pretty much just an annoyance to me. The vampire I can't kill because it would be like killing a rabid dog with no teeth. No point and not worth the effort. So maybe I wouldn't have checked to see if you were with us either."

Buffy sat there and watched Spike. He looked like he was sleeping and she was hoping that his friend would be here soon. It wouldn't be long before the sun was coming into the windows and eventually it would hit Spike. Buffy wanted to go and see her friends and Dawn and see how they were doing, but she didn't want to leave until she knew that Spike was fine. Once she knew that Spike was being taken care of she could go and check in on the others. She sat there for two hours watching the sun moving closer on the floor to Spike when finally the door opened and two men walked in. The one was clearly a demon. His skin was loose and hanging off of him and he had floppy ears. The other looked completely human and was carrying a blanket.

"Damn Spike." Clem said as he went over to Spike.

The other man did as well and he removed Spike's jacket and looked him over.

"He's seriously injured. We need to get him back to his crypt and get blood into him." The man said.

He took the blanket and wrapped Spike up in it before he picked Spike up bridal style and they both left the room. Buffy followed and saw the man place Spike into the back of a cargo van that had no side windows. She watched as he folded Spike's coat and placed it under his head as he spoke.

"You drive I need to see about his injuries." The man said to Clem.

Clem gave a nod and went over to the driver's side door and got in.

"Well he'll be fine. I now need to see Dawn and the others." Buffy said as the van took off.

The van didn't even get ten feet before Buffy found herself appearing in the van with Spike.

"Ok what the hell was that?" Buffy asked to no one.

The man continued to look Spike over and Buffy could see that the bruising got even worse since she saw it last time.

"Why isn't he waking up? He's a light sleeper he should be waking up." Clem said with worry.

"He's lost too much blood. His body is in a deep sleep, like a coma. He won't wake up until we get blood into him. Good part is that he won't be awake when I set his bones. Do you know what blood he has?"

"Pig most likely. He doesn't get human. Blood bank won't give out human blood to vamps unless the Slayer allows it. She doesn't though you know that." Clem said.

"Damian should know better though. The Slayer will l never allow it. Spike should be that exception with being a Master and on the side of good." The man said.

"I know. He's saved that guys life over a hundred times in the last couple of years, but unless the Slayer gives the okay he can't get any." Clem said.

"He needs human blood to heal. Animal blood will only keep him alive. It weakens his strength and makes him more tired. The Slayer wants to use him as her personal weapon than maybe she should make sure her weapon is in top condition. Seven packages of human blood a week is all he needs to be in perfect shape. This could have been avoided." The man said with annoyance in his voice as he pushed Spike's ribs back inside his chest.

"Well how would I know that? He's not my weapon either he's just useful every now and then. Besides he's fine on animal blood. The blood in the blood banks are for humans that need it to survive. Not for hungry vampires." Buffy said annoyed and defensive.

"She won't though. Slayers haven't been kind to demons in sixty years. It's why we all have to hide and live underground. So many of us good ones have been killed it makes a demon nervous." Clem said.

"Being around that Slayer and these humans will get him killed. Why he constantly involves himself with humans I'll never understand. He does it too often." The man said.

"He's done it before." Clem said.

"It always happens. He comes across a human and something in him connects to that human. He goes out of his way to protect them only to be destroyed when they die. He raised a human child for three years while her mother was in a coma and recovering. When they were both killed by a pack of vampires he lost it. Slaughtered them all before shutting himself down to everyone. He was depressed for a year, he wouldn't even leave his house. These humans he's around will get him killed." The man said with frustration and sadness in his voice.

"He was probably getting something out of taking care of that kid. Why else would a soulless and dangerous vampire do that?" Buffy said trying to rationalize Spike's actions instead of facing the facts.

"Is it true what they say about him? He never talks about it." Clem asked.

"That would depend on what they say" The man said.

"That he was made wrong. I got family that was in the Initiative the same time as Spike. Spike was there for a week and they tortured him more, called it experiments, but it was torture. My cousin overheard that lady doctor, the one in charge, talking to a few others in lab coats and that boyfriend of the Slayer. She said that Spike's body reacted differently than other demons or vampires. His body reacted like he was a human. That the emotional half of his brain still functioned normally. My cousin thought it was sad, because it made them torture him more, especially that boyfriend of the Slayer. He was brutal to Spike. My Cousin said that it was sad though because if Spike wasn't made right that meant he didn't really belong anywhere. Too human for the vampires and too dead for the humans. It's sad when you think about it. I've never noticed before, but it does make sense with who he is. You've known him longer than me thought maybe you asked or he said something." Clem explained.

"Really? How is that even possible? How can a vampire be made wrong?" Buffy said confused and really wishing someone could have answered her.

"He doesn't talk about it and I've never asked. That boyfriend of the Slayer was a real piece of work though. Did ya know he came by afterwards when Spike caught him in a bite house, he staked Spike right in the middle of his heart with a plastic wood grain stake. Blamed Spike for his own mistakes. It took everything in me not to go find him and beat the hell out of him. It's good he's gone, caused too much trouble." The man said with anger in his voice.

"What? No he must have lied, Riley would never do something like that. That can't be true." Buffy said with denial in her voice.

"I didn't know that, but Spike doesn't always tell me everything. He keeps a lot to himself. He's gotten more guarded over the years, been hurt and betrayed too many times. I get it." Clem said with a shrug as he pulled up behind Spike's crypt.

Once the van stopped the man covered up Spike once again while Clem came around to open the doors before leaving to open the front door to Spike's crypt. The man picked Spike up and walked quickly around to the front. Buffy followed figuring it was better than sitting in the van by herself. Plus she was hearing some serious gossip about Spike. Once inside they took Spike down to the lower level and placed him down on the bed. The man then removed the blanket as he spoke.

"I need to get some blood for him at the hospital. Stay here in case someone comes by. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"I'll clean up some of the blood off him and see if he has any up in the fridge that I can get him started on." Clem said.

"I'll bring an infusion kit just in case he can't stomach it with his state." The man said.

"He'll hate that."

"We might not have a choice until his body is more healed. A few bags of human blood right into his veins will heal him quicker. Then he should be able to drink it. He's so deep into the sleep state he won't even notice." The man reassured Clem.

Clem gave an unsure nod and the man headed out of the basement with Clem behind him.

"Well you are clearly going to be okay so I'm leaving now." Buffy said hoping that it would work this time.

Buffy turned and headed for the ladder, but once she reached it she found herself hitting an invisible wall once again. She let out a frustrated yell before she look up and spoke.

"Seriously? Why? Why? Why is Spike the only one I seem to be able to be around? What kind of sick and twisted Hell is this? I get to be a spook and haunt Spike for the rest of his unlife? He could live for centuries if he's lucky. Come on I want to see my friends, my family, the people I love. I don't want to stand around looking at Spike!"

Buffy went to punch the dirt wall, but found her fist went right through.

"Ya sure that makes perfect sense. I can lean or sit on things, but I can't hit anything. What is this Bizzarro World?"

Buffy turned around as Clem was making his way back down the ladder with a blood package. She went over and leaned against Spike's dresser and looked around.

"It's not that bad down here. Didn't really notice last time." Buffy said as she took everything in.

Clem went over to the bed as he spoke.

"Okay Spike Buddy you gotta drink this otherwise Der is going to put a needle in your arm and you are going to hate it. So drink up for me, all you gotta do is swallow so we know you can."

Clem put the package of blood to Spike's mouth and opened his mouth a little. He had cut the corner out of the package so the blood would come out slowly. He didn't want to make Spike choke or anything. He let a little bit out, but Spike didn't react to it at all.

"Come on Spike, swallow the blood Buddy." Clem pleaded as he rubbed Spike's neck to try and get the muscles awake and working.

"You've done this before for him. I wonder when? Spike doesn't seem like the type of vampire to get injured that badly often. Sure he gets injured, but not so badly that he can't drink his blood himself. I wonder how long you've been friends." Buffy said as she observed the two of them.

Clem let out a disappointed sigh and took the blood back and placed it down on the bedside table as Spike wasn't drinking it.

"Well Buddy, I'm sorry for Der and me putting in a needle. I know you'll hate it, but it has to be done. We can't just let you die. He'll be back soon and after a few pints of good human blood you'll be able to drink it on your own. I'll pick you up some whiskey and some hot wings and we can hang out watching some movies. You'll feel all better in no time. You can tell me what happened and everything will be alright. You'll be back out there fighting in no time." Clem said trying to sound hopeful, but Buffy could hear the pain and sadness in his voice.

"Wow you really care about him. But you're a demon, you shouldn't be able to care. But Spike shouldn't have cried like that either earlier. He was more broken up over my death than my own friends were. But demons and vampires can't feel, they can't care. Everyone knows that, Giles knows that he taught me that. He wouldn't have if it wasn't true. Yet, you clearly care about him." Buffy rubbed her hands over her face before she continued. "Ahh, too much thinking. I'm dead I shouldn't have to think. Isn't that a rule somewhere? You die you don't have to think or figure things out when they don't matter anymore. I'm dead nothing I learn here will be helpful to me or to anyone as I am dead. I should be in Heaven right now with my mom, not sitting here with Spike. God this sucks." Buffy crossed her arms and was clearly pouting. But she had died to save the world she deserved to pout for a few good minutes about her current situation. Like how she only seemed to be able to go where Spike is. It was the worst punishment ever.

Buffy sat there while they waited for the other guy, Der, to come back from the hospital. Buffy was getting the feeling that Der wasn't as human as she thought he was. She didn't know what type of demon he was as she had never seen a demon that could look human before. She could have asked Giles if it wasn't for the fact she was currently dead. It was an hour when Der came back down the ladder. He went over to Spike and got the infusion ready. Buffy wanted to ask why a vampire would have a problem with an infusion, but again no one could hear her.

"How long will he need that?" Clem asked with worry.

"A day at most. We just need to get enough blood into him to get his body interested in drinking the blood. There's more blood in his fridge for later. One of us will need to stay with him at all times to make sure he's getting enough blood in him until he's awake and able to do it."

"I'll stay with him. I just need to change the blood package when it's empty right?"

"That's it." Der said as he inserted the needle into Spike's arm and placed the bag up on a nail coming through the dirt. "His bones are all set, now he just needs blood. I have to get home to my very pregnant wife. Let me know if you need any more blood."

"Thanks Der."

"I'll come by tomorrow to check in. I might know more about what happened to him."

"Ok I'll see you tomorrow."

Der gave Clem a pat on the back before he turned and headed out of the basement and up the ladder. Buffy sat there and watched as Clem put a blanket over Spike's body as he spoke.

"I know you hate being cold. You normally live in a place with a fireplace. Never understood how you even felt cold, but you always do."

"Vampires don't get cold, they don't feel the temperature. But they also don't cry when someone dies. They also don't react the same way to pain that humans do, but Professor Walsh said Spike does. Maybe he was made wrong, but how would that even happen? Great, more questions that will never be answered." Buffy said.

Clem went over and grabbed one of the chairs that was in the room and moved it over to be closer to Spike. He sat down and waited for when he could do something for Spike. Buffy had no choice, but to sit and wait with him as for some reason she seemed to be linked to Spike.

Day 7

"Seriously? It's been seven days. How can he still be asleep after seven days of getting human blood? He looks healed to me, so why isn't he waking up? And why hasn't anyone come here to check on him? I mean okay I get it I died, but still they should have come by the next day to check in on him and make sure he was alive. I would have, even if it was to thank him for helping out. He didn't exactly have to. God just wake up already Spike so you can walk out of here and go see my friends, because then I can go and see my friends." Buffy said as she paced around with her hands on her hips.

She was beyond bored and frustrated. In the past week all she had been able to do is be stuck down here in what Spike had setup as his bedroom. She couldn't even go up the freaking ladder. Every time she tried she hit an invisible wall. It was frustrating because she just wanted to check in on Dawn and her friends. She wanted to make sure they were alright. The problem was all week the only people who came to see Spike was Clem or Der. One of them always stayed right by his bed feeding him. After that first day they were able to get Spike to drink the blood, but he wouldn't wake up. She could tell they were getting worried at how long Spike was taking to wake up. Buffy was brought out of her rant when Der walked down the ladder and over to Clem.

"Nothing yet?" Der asked.

"No. Why isn't he waking up?" Clem asked with worry.

"I went by the Butchers on a hunch. He's been on animal blood for over a year now. He hasn't had any human blood or anything stronger than pig's blood. The Butcher can only issue so many animal blood packages out a week to the public and there are a lot of humans that buy it because of rituals or spells. He can't hold any back unless the Slayer states he can for a specific vampire and as we know the Slayer doesn't do that or didn't do that I should say. He's only been getting enough for three packages a day." Der answered.

"No wonder he's been so tired and weaker. His body doesn't have enough to keep going on just three a day. With animal blood he needs double that at least. It's nowhere near as strong as human blood. That's why he's still out." Clem said with understanding in his voice.

"His body was pushed too far and now it is trying to recover from the damage the animal blood did to him. It pisses me off. He's been helping the Slayer for over a year now. She's been using him just like some weapon in her trunk and when she doesn't find him useful she tosses him aside. She should have been looking out for him if she was going to be using him like this. Seven packages of human blood a week, one a day, would be enough to keep him at full health and strength. He would have stood a chance against this Hell God. He could have beaten her if the Slayer had gotten off her high horse and done something about it." Der said with anger.

"Hey I didn't know here. It's not my fault. He didn't exactly open his mouth and mention any of this to me. I… ok I wouldn't have believed him, but still you can't blame me for this. I'm dead here." Buffy said.

"The Slayer didn't know about any of this." Clem said.

"Thank-you. Finally someone who understands." Buffy said exasperated.

"She didn't care to either. She just blindly followed the orders of her Watcher and friends. Being human was more important to her than doing what was right by everyone. Her world was so perfectly black and white. She had no idea just what her purpose was truly about. She had a powerful and valuable warrior right there beside her and she did everything to keep him weak and feeling like nothing more than dirt there for her to step on and kick whenever the mood called for it."

"He tried to kill me multiple times. He tried to kill my friends multiple times. And you want me to what? Be friends with him because the Government made it so he couldn't hurt anyone. I don't like him. I don't like people who try and kill me and my friends. He wouldn't leave town though so what else was I supposed to do, besides use him when the need called for it. That doesn't make me a bad person." Buffy said offended at Der's words.

"He's use to abuse you know that. He's been abused by somebody his whole life and unlife. That's just normal to him. If someone treats him with kindness he doesn't understand. It doesn't matter how many times I'm there for him he doesn't understand why. All this cocky arrogance is just a front you know that. Something to help keep the pain pushed down." Clem said sadly.

"You know that and I know that, but others don't. Angelus was the worst. The amount of torture and rape he put Spike through for two decades. If I was a violent demon I would have killed him for the continuous torture he still puts Spike through." Der said with venom dripping from his voice.

"Angel would never torture anyone. He has a soul now. Whatever happened in the past when he didn't doesn't matter, because that's not who he is anymore." Buffy automatically said in Angel's defense.

"He still has all of Spike's money and accounts in his name. I keep telling Spike to go and demand him to sign it back over to him. It's his money, his family's money. And there Angel is holding it hostage from him. It's why he's living here and getting furniture from the dump. He won't go and see him. Too many painful memories whenever he sees him, especially since the chip. He's back to feeling vulnerable and defenseless. He won't go see Angel unless he has no other choice. I mean we're talking millions of dollars sitting in accounts that Angel is keeping from him. Forced him through endless torture until he signed the papers almost a century ago. People really have no idea just what he went through, what he deals with." Clem said sadly.

"Angel wouldn't do that. He wouldn't do that." Buffy said as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"The vampire that doesn't belong." Der said sadly.

Spike let out a groan and everyone's attention snapped right to him. Spike slowly opened his eyes and Buffy was so thankful that he was finally awake. She was hoping that meant that he would get up and go out and see the others. She had been going insane all week not knowing how they were doing, not being able to see them.

"Hey Spike, how ya feeling?" Clem asked with a warm smile.

"Tired. How long?" Spike asked with a gravelly voice.

"You've been out cold for a week now. We've been giving you human blood. I had to give you an infusion for the first day of it. You weren't responding to blood at all." Der answered.

Spike gave a groan at hearing he had to have an infusion. He hated those, all vampires did. Unless you had some eating disorder that got carried over to the afterlife.

"I know I'm sorry, but we didn't have a choice." Der said apologetically.

"It's okay mate. Only you two been by?" Spike asked and everyone could tell he was still very much weak right now.

"Just us. It's been crazy out there. Word got around that the Slayer is dead. How is unclear though. You got hurt in the fight?" Clem asked gently.

"Ya. Fell 'bout ten stories off a tower. Hell God was going to go back home by openin' a portal to her Hell dimension, bringin' Hell on Earth. I lost a fight and Buffy died cause of it." Spike said with hurt in his voice.

"It's not your fault Spike. You haven't been a hundred percent in a long time. It's not your fault you lost that fight. It's not your fault that this Hell God decided she was going to try and destroy the world. It's not your fault the Slayer died." Der said gently trying to get Spike to understand.

"The others, the Bit, is she okay? Do you know?" Spike asked and it was clear he wasn't going to be listening to them about whose fault it was.

"We haven't seen her. Word is that only the Slayer died that night and the Hell God and her minions have disappeared. Safe to say she is dead and most of her minions are as well. I set your breaks and they have pretty much healed. Your leg will be sore still and you won't be able to hold all of your weight on it just yet. Your ribs are almost healed as well. There is also more blood in your fridge." Der answered.

"Baby yet?" Spike asked as he fought to keep his eyes open.

"Not yet. And if she doesn't have it soon I am going to lose my mind." Der said with a warm smile.

"Take her on a fast trip on a bumpy road." Spike said.

"I might have to try that." Der agreed.

"You should go home, both of you. I'm fine now." Spike said and they could tell he wasn't in the mood for company.

"If you need anything you know where we will be." Der said.

"I'll come by to check in on you tomorrow. Feel better buddy." Clem said as he patted Spike's right forearm.

"Best thing for you is rest and blood." Der said.

"I know. Thanks." Spike said to the both of them.

"See you tomorrow." Clem said with a warm smile.

They both turned and headed out of the basement and out of the crypt. Buffy went over and sat down on the edge of the bed facing Spike.

"I know you're tired, but if you could find the strength to just get up and check in on Dawnie and the others that would be great." Buffy said with a sweet smile.

Unfortunately for Buffy Spike couldn't keep his eyes open anymore and he was once again pushed under the darkness. Buffy let out a sigh as Spike was back to being asleep. She knew he was injured, but she really wanted to know how Dawn and her friends were doing and the only way to do that was for Spike to do it. She didn't want to wait any longer. Buffy got up off the bed and began to pace around with her arms crossed over her chest.

"Is it too much to ask to be sent to Heaven? I mean really how many times have I saved the world from ending? How many people have I saved from being killed by a vamp or a demon? Is it too much to ask that I could have been granted my eternal peace after everything I have done for this world? No I get to be a ghost and stuck to Spike of all people. Not even Dawn, my sister. No Spike the biggest pain in my ass I have ever come across."

Buffy hated this, she hated every second she had to spend stuck here while Spike slept. She hated that for God knows how long she would be trapped with Spike and be stuck watching his sick and evil ways. This was the last place Buffy wanted to be and she was stuck here no matter how badly she wanted to leave. Buffy went to kick a bottle that was on the ground only to have her foot go right through it. Buffy rolled her eyes at not being able to properly let out her frustration. She was in another form of Hell.

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It wasn't until a few hours later after sunset did Buffy hear the crypt's door opening and being slammed shut. Buffy was hoping that it would be one of her friends and not one of Spike's. She wanted to see her friends and Dawn so badly that it hurt. She was shocked when she saw Angel drop down the hole in the floor. Buffy couldn't help, but smile at the sight of him. She wanted so badly to go over there and hug him, but she forced herself to stay still, knowing that she would just go right through him.

"Angel." Buffy said with a dreamy smile at seeing the man she would always love.

Angel obviously didn't hear her and he went over to the bed with pure anger radiating off from him. Buffy watched in shock at Angel as he went and grabbed Spike by the biceps and threw him out of his bed and into the wall. Spike woke up just before his body crashed into the wall on the other side of the room.

"Angel, what the hell are you doing?" Buffy asked with anger as she stood up.

Spike coughed up blood as he looked over and saw Angel stalking towards him as he spoke.

"It's your fault. She's dead because of you." Angel growled out before he kicked Spike right in the ribs with all his strength.

Spike groan from the pain, but Angel didn't care. He grabbed Spike and threw him into the other wall. Before going over there to Spike and punching him across the face.

"Stop it! It's not his fault!" Buffy yelled shocked that Angel was doing this and blaming Spike.

Angel couldn't hear her though so he continued to punch and kick Spike with everything that he had. Spike didn't even have the strength to fight back, all he could do was take it.

"It's your fault the woman I love is dead." Angel growled out.

Spike coughed up more blood before he spoke with a weak and raspy voice.

"You should have been there than. You shouldn't have ran away like a coward."

"Coward?" Angel said as he kicked Spike right in the stomach. "I did what was right. I did what she deserved. She deserved to have a normal life. To be in the sunlight and you took that from her."

Angel grabbed Spike's broken leg and pulled him away from the wall. Spike groan as the pain shot up his leg from it being jostled around. Angel got down on his knees so he could punch Spike across the face a few times. Spike laid there on the ground unable to move or even defend himself. His mind was swimming from the pain that his still injured body was in.

"You're a disgrace to the family, you've always been. A freak in the demon world. Not evil enough to be a proper vampire, but not good enough to be human. Not alive enough. I should have killed you the second Drusilla brought you home. You took the woman I love from me. You got her killed and now you have to pay for it." Angel took out a stake from his coat pocket and stabbed Spike with it right in his right shoulder. It went right through and almost into the ground. Spike let out a small scream at the pain.

"Angel stop this please. He didn't do anything wrong." Buffy said even though Angel couldn't hear her. She didn't know why he was acting like this. It wasn't Spike's fault for what happened to her.

Angel went and grabbed Spike's jeans and pulled hard enough that they ripped right off. Buffy went still at seeing it.

"What are you doing?" Buffy asked with fear in her voice.

"You need to pay for what you did to her. For killing her. Killing the woman I love." Angel said as he undid his own pants and to Buffy's horror he was already stone hard.

"You're enjoying this. Enjoying hurting him." Buffy said with a shaky voice.

"Stop." Spike said weakly with a heavy breath.

"Shut up and take your punishment." Angel said as he pushed Spike so he was on his stomach pushing the stake even further in his shoulder.

"Don't do this." Buffy said shaking slightly at the sight in front of her.

Angel shoved right inside of Spike causing Spike to let out a scream from the pain radiating throughout his body. Buffy put his hand over her mouth in shock and disgust at what Angel, the man that she loves, was doing to Spike. Spike didn't even have the strength to fight back against him. Spike had almost died to try and save Dawn, it wasn't his fault for what happened. Buffy didn't blame him. She knew that there was a good chance that she could die fighting Glory. She accepted that every time she went out the door at night. Accepted that any night she walked out the front door she might not come back home. She knew that and she accepted that a long time ago. She didn't blame anyone for what happened, especially Spike. He tried his best. She knew that he would have done his best because it was Dawn's life on the line. He didn't deserve this, no one did.

"You know what I've always enjoyed about you Willie? How your body can react to pain just like a human. The smell of that sweet fear that comes off from you. I forgot how much fun it is with you." Angel growled out as he continued to violently thrust into Spike.

"This isn't happening." Buffy said as she turned and tried to walk away, but there really wasn't anywhere she could go. She was trapped down here, because Spike was. "You wouldn't do this. You're supposed to be good, to have a soul. How can you do this to him? This isn't happening." Buffy was shaking all over now at the realisation that Angel, the man that she loves, was not the man she thought he was. He was supposed to be good. He wasn't supposed to be like this anymore. It was like Angelus was here all over again, only he wasn't. Angel was here, Angel who had a soul. Angel that had beaten a weak Spike and was now raping him. He was enjoying it, he was getting off on the pain and fear of it. Like a monster.

Buffy turned and saw Angel vamp out and tore into Spike's neck. Spike yelled as Angel savagely tore into Spike's neck while his thrusts got even more erratic and faster. After a few moments he grunted and his hips stopped. Angel let go of Spike's neck and Spike was barely conscious. His neck was bleeding heavily and it looked like he was attacked by a lion or some other huge wild animal. Angel pulled out of Spike and Buffy felt sick at the sight of the amount of blood that was pouring out of Spike. Angel got up and did his pants back up as he licked his lips.

"You'll always be worthless Willie. Always be nothing. I'll always be better than you. Next time I'm in town, you better be so far underground that not even the rats can find you. Because if I find you, I'm not going to stop until you beg me to kill you." Angel said with a deadly tone.

"You're a monster." Buffy said with disgust and hatred in her voice as she looked at Angel with tears in her eyes.

Angel turned and headed up the ladder and out of the crypt. Buffy saw that Spike was fighting to keep his eyes open. He was loosing blood, a lot of it, and Spike didn't have much extra to lose. He had just woken up from being in a coma basically for a week. His body couldn't take this pain to go with it. Buffy went over to Spike and bent down so she was closer to him. She went to touch him, but stopped herself. She couldn't even touch him, she couldn't even help him. The man that she loves, or thought she loved, just beat the hell out of him and raped him, and she couldn't even comfort or help him. She couldn't tell him that it wasn't his fault. She couldn't help him get cleaned up. She couldn't get him blood. She couldn't touch him. She couldn't do a single thing. Buffy had never felt so helpless before in her whole life as she did in this moment.

"It's okay Spike. I'm so sorry." Buffy said as a few tears went down her cheeks.

Spike was shaking in pain and he had a few tears going down his face. Spike felt like his whole body was on fire. He knew he needed to get the bleeding to stop or he was going to be in serious danger. He had to get into the shower and get the cold water going so it would slow down and stop the bleeding. Spike very slowly forced his body to move. He couldn't stand though with his leg so he slowly crawled over to the bathroom with his legs dragging behind him. Buffy walked with him and felt horrible at seeing Spike trying to get to the washroom, something Buffy didn't even know he had until she came down here a week ago. Once in the bathroom Spike reached up and turned the cold water on all the way for the shower. Spike dragged himself into the shower that was just cement walls on three sides. He leaned back against the one wall where the water would hit him. He tensed and let out a hiss as the cold water hit his bruised and bloody body. Spike hated the cold, he always had. This was just more torture on him. Buffy bent down so she was closer to Spike. Spike moved his left hand and grabbed the stake and pulled it out as quickly as he could, unfortunately, it was not as fast as he would have liked. Buffy moved her hands to help once again going on instinct and not remembering that she couldn't help. Once the stake was out Spike tossed it aside slightly, not having the energy or strength to do much else.

"My fault." Spike said weakly as his eyes closed and a few tears came down his bruised cheeks.

"No it's not Spike. I wish I could tell you that; make you understand that you did nothing wrong." Buffy said sadly as she had her own tears going down her cheeks.

Buffy wanted to help Spike, but she couldn't do anything. So she did the only thing she could think of. She sat down there on the floor and stayed with Spike while he passed out in the shower with the cold water slowly turning from red to light pink to clear once again.

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It was six hours later when Spike gained consciousness once again. He was shivering and his lips had a slight blue tint to them. The cold water was still coming out and he groaned at the pain that registered in his mind. The cold water had made him stiff and the pain even worse. He was no longer bleeding, but he was also extremely weak from the blood loss. Spike was trying his best to keep his eyes open, but it was becoming harder and harder to do so. Spike forced his eyes to stay open. He knew he had to move if he wanted to live. The problem was he didn't really want to live right now. He wanted to just die. The only reason he wasn't giving in was because of his stubbornness of granting Angel the satisfaction of killing him. Spike dragged himself out of the bathroom and back to his bed. He pulled himself into bed and reached over to the nightstand and opened the drawer. He picked up the whiskey bottle from it and he unscrewed the cap and took a very long pull from the bottle. After taking a long drink Spike put the bottle down on the nightstand and laid down. His whole body was shaking from the pain and cold and he just let the darkness come down on him. Buffy sat down on the bed beside Spike and just sat there watching over him. She couldn't do anything to help or protect him, but it made her feel better to be there with him. Maybe he wouldn't feel so alone.

It wasn't until the next night did Buffy hear the door upstairs opening. Spike had been awake a few times throughout the day, but that was only to drink the whiskey and not go up and get some blood. Buffy figured that with his injuries he wouldn't be able to actually get up the ladder and get some blood. Buffy heard some movement around upstairs and she figured that it was one of Spike's friends here and not someone else. Buffy was still hoping that someone would come by and see Spike, but so far none of her friends had. After a few minutes someone came down the ladder and Buffy saw that it was Clem and Der once again. Clem had a mug in his hand with blood Buffy assumed. They both walked over to Spike and immediately noticed the new injuries on Spike and the now empty whiskey bottle on the nightstand.

"What the hell happened?" Der asked with anger as he went to the bed to look Spike over. "Spike, Spike wake up." Der said.

Spike groaned at being woken up and he opened his eyes slightly and saw Der standing there.

"Der." Spike said with a weak voice.

"Spike what happened?" Der asked with worry.

"Angelus." Spike answered weakly as he forced himself to keep his eyes open.

"You need to drink this blood. You're too weak." Der said as he took the mug of blood away from Clem.

Der wasn't even gonna give Spike a chance to argue. He placed his hand under Spike's head and brought the mug to Spike's mouth. Slowly Spike drank the blood and once the mug was empty Der lowered Spike's head and he placed the mug down on the nightstand.

"You need to be drinking more blood Spike." Der said.

Spike hummed as his eyes were already closed and Der knew that he wasn't going to be awake for any longer. Der let out a sigh as he looked over at Clem.

"Can you stay here for a few days and make sure he's drinking enough?"

"Ya totally." Clem easily agreed.

"He needs to be drinking a mug every two hours, even if he doesn't want to. It's the only way he's going to heal." Der said.

"I'll make sure he does. Don't worry, just focus on your wife." Clem said with an easy smile.

"Who is going to pop any day now. Ok I need to get some more ice cream and head home. Be safe." Der said as he looked back at Spike clearly concerned for his safety as well.

"We will. Go home to your wife. He wouldn't want you to be away from her, not when she is so very pregnant." Clem said.

"I know. I just hate this. Alright I'll come by and check in and bring more blood."

"We'll be fine, go." Clem said.

"Thanks." Der said before he left and headed up the ladder and out of the crypt.

Clem went and sat down in the chair next to the bed.

"Here we are again." Buffy said to Clem even though he couldn't hear her.

Buffy didn't know how long it would take for Spike to heal, but she was hoping that soon he would be able to leave and go see her friends or Dawn. Buffy was also hoping that one of them would come by at some point to check in on Spike. She wanted so badly to see them and make sure they were okay, because Spike clearly wasn't. The problem was all Buffy could do now was just wait and see how Spike would heal. Waiting, not something Buffy was very good at, but she didn't have a choice. All she could do was wait.