Warning: A minor spoiler from a recent chapter. That's all xD
This is set in an AU (if you wish to call it that) where all the Strawhat pirates departed together from Zou.
Disclaimer: ... nah, don't own it.
"After months of research, I've finally constructed our plan of action!" Nami's palm slammed on the open surface of the table as the navigator took in the people seated at the table in front of her.
The rest of the Strawhats looked partly uncomfortable, partly doubtful of the situation they just found themselves in. Luffy was only hungry, though.
"I'm not even going to address that time span, but tell us again." Usopp grimaced, like a rather painful memory had just played inside his mind. "What are we doing infiltrating a Marine Base again?"
The sniper gulped at the positively feral expression the woman at the head of the table was displaying.
"There was a rumor back when we left Zou, backed up by an article in the newspaper," the orange head added, seeing Robin's mouth open in protest, "World Economics, to be specific, that a Marine Base a few days' distance now from our last stop had just received from the Headquarters an acceptable sum of money that, I concluded, must enter in our possession immediately."
"And this sum is?" Zoro asked gruffly, clearly not on board with Nami's stupid plans caused by incurable greed.
"One billion Berri."
The three words reverberated through the galley and her friends' jaws – save Robin's – hung open at the revelation.
"Yosh! We're going to steal all the money and meat!" Luffy declared, jumping on his seat and grinning to each of them happily.
Nami smirked, glad that her captain was as predictable as always. It had almost been too simple.
"And how are we going to infiltrate this base?" Her fellow female's voice was skeptical and, for once, Nami felt partly betrayed, partly irritated at her senior. She could be at least a little encouraging if nothing else.
Clearing her throat, the navigator addressed her friends and their expectant expressions.
"I've been digging for information on every island we have docked on until now and I've found everything we need." She reached in her jeans' pockets and produced several photos.
"These people are the highest ranked in G-20."
Eight pairs of eyes took in the strange people in the photos, all varying in shot angles that made it hard to see them clearly.
"They were taken by pirates or bounty hunters, so of course they are not so good." Nami explained sarcastically. "But they are enough to give us an idea on how to approach this. From what I gathered, there have been numerous conflicts between the Commodore in charge of the base and its recruits, though they weren't very serious."
"You really did plan everything, didn't you?" Usopp squeaked, knowing full well that they were done for. If Luffy and Nami were in on it, they would be whether they wanted to or not.
The navigator nodded decisively and continued her explanation.
"Even if they weren't serious, it still made the general mood of the base not so positive. I've taken advantage of it and sent a forged letter to the Commodore that was supposed to be from Marine Headquarters in which the guy was to be promoted. And he was expected to arrive at HQ in a week's time to receive it and be transferred elsewhere. Then I got some random pirates to wait for him and sink his ship."
A booming silence made its way between the usual happy crew. Only Franky's occasional slurps of his Cola disrupted it rather comically.
"So you killed the guy." Zoro concluded. Chopper whimpered from his seat and threw her an accusing glare along with Usopp and the swordsman himself.
Nami only shrugged, unconcerned with her deeds. "I've only told them to take care of him. My fault only extends so much. Besides, I have other things to deal with right now."
"Nami." Luffy's serious voice signaled that she had gone a little too far for his questionable moral lines. Though his eyes were shadowed by his straw hat, Nami could feel his penetrating gaze. "Are you sure doing it was worth the money?"
The navigator knew very well that she should choose her words carefully since if one word ticked her captain wrong, all her efforts would go to waste. Unfortunately, he will soon find out that he had no other choice in the matter.
"Yes since we're all out of money at the moment." She admitted and her crewmates looked at her with wide, accusing stares. Luffy and Sanji's were the most horrified out of them all. "I've paid our last money to those pirates."
"She bet everything on this." Zoro exhaled in irritation.
Robin gave him an amused glance.
"I believe her reasons might be more than just the price this time."
"Doubt it." Usopp and Chopper said at the same time, slumping on the table.
"Yohoho! It gives me the chills to know we're on our way to a Marine Base." Brook commented as he sipped his tea calmly. "Though I have no skin and flesh!"
"Yow! I'm sure our navigator will take care of everything." Franky grinned, opening another bottle of his favorite drink.
"You actually look willing." The resident sniper sniffed indignantly from his spot of misery. "Why?"
"Well, I've been expecting something like this to happen." The cyborg said in all seriousness. "After all, we've been in no danger for the past few weeks."
"And since Luffy didn't have the occasion to do anything to jeopardize the peace, one of us had to." Sanji finished, placing a plate full of pastries in front of Robin and Nami's empty seat. His eyes expectedly transformed into hearts. "I'm just happy to be of help to Nami-swan!"
"You'd just do anything she'd ask of you, stupid cook." The swordsman grunted, sinking in his seat. "We are not idiots like you."
"Shut up, marimo! This is your fault entirely! My wonderful Nami-swan wouldn't have needed to steal money from marines if you idiots wouldn't eat and drink like idiots." The blonde said, munching on the butt of his cigarette angrily and slapping Usopp's hand away from the act of stealing.
"We haven't been eating more than usual-" Chopper's words were cut off by a scorching look from their cook.
"We've been having feasts everyday in the last week!"
A grim silence settled over the room at said revelation when the door was thrown open and their navigator entered, huffing at the tirade Luffy was pulling in the hopes he'd get to call the shots.
"No you won't!" The young woman twirled around to glare at the rubber man. "Now go sit in your place and let me explain the plan to you!" She pointed to his former seat.
Luffy pouted, but seeing as there was no reasoning with her, trudged towards his chair in relative silence save for the continuous mumbling over his much better and fun plan.
"Alright." Nami declared, dropping a stack of papers on the table.
"Are these the plans, Nami?" Chopper asked curiously.
The navigator hummed positively. "I've been studying everything closely based on those photos and, luckily, we'll be able to actually pull this off if you'll do what I will tell you to do." She paused, eyeing the people most probable to destroy her plan. Which was the whole crew, now that she thought about it. Sighing in frustration, she picked one of the files and sent it towards Usopp.
"You can easily pass as the Commodore's son, so you'll be playing the part. The story is that the Marines have appointed you as the new head of the base when your father sadly died a heroic death on his way to Headquarters."
"What! I have to handle a whole marine base?!" The sniper positively screeched.
"Yes and you will do a damn good job of it!" Nami slammed her fist on the table threateningly, making the long nosed man gulp and nod rapidly.
"Robin will be your creepy assistant."
The archaeologist raised an eyebrow.
"Usopp's father-"
"He's not my father!" Said man growled with surprising ferocity and Nami paused to reconsider her words carefully.
"Usopp's fake father," the orange head scrunched up her nose at the still glowering look on her friend's face, "had her working under him. We'll just tell them that you've been appointed to attend to his son."
Robin nodded, albeit hesitantly, and accepted the files her friend handed her.
"Next is the secretary... which will be me." She placed another miniature stack in front of her. "Now comes the hard part. I have seven idiots that need to be given jobs."
Zoro rolled his eye while Franky and Brook only chuckled.
"Fake father had a special squad of assassins that were entirely under his command. Fake son will have inherited it as well. Zoro, Brook and Sanji." She pointed to each man with her index finger. "You're up."
"You've gotta be kidding me!" The green haired man sank even further in his seat. "I'm not doing any of that ninja stuff."
Nami smirked. "You won't need to. The squad specialized in swords."
Zoro's interest was certainly piqued, but there was still someone that found the need to protest.
"But Nami-san... I don't have a sword nor do I know how to fight with one!" Sanji said, his temple twitching at Zoro's inferno of jarring taunts.
"Ah, don't worry about that. Zoro can share." Nami's words successfully shut the green haired man up and Luffy burst out laughing instead, quickly followed by Usopp.
"Hell no, witch!" The swordsman growled menacingly, a hand atop his swords in a protective gesture.
The orange head rolled her eyes. "You have three. The assassins use only one sword normally. Besides, you'd stick out like a sore thumb skipping around with three swords at your waist when they knew you to possess only one. Every idiot with half a mind would know it is Roronoa Zoro!"
"How comes that?" Zoro asked stubbornly.
"You're the most famous and probably only user of Santōryū." The navigator said blandly, her raised eyebrows clearly conveying the obvious message: 'You either do what you're told, or I'll make sure you will'. "Sanji-kun and Brook will each get one of yours."
"But Nami-san," it was the musician's turn to protest, "I have my own sword-"
"In a cane. We have to be inconspicuous people!" Nami exclaimed, throwing her hands up in exasperation. She knew it would be hard, but not this hard.
"So my swords are?"
"Yes, they are because your face is on the bounty poster, not your swords!"
"Why do I even have to carry around the idiot swordsman's sword?" Sanji sighed, lighting up another cigarette.
"What will I be, Nami?" Chopper waved his hoof in the air excitedly.
Nami gave him an unnervingly blank look before droning a response. "Usopp's reindeer pet."
"WHAT!" Both sniper and doctor exclaimed, one chocking and one angry.
"Usopp's fake father had a tiger pet! He was an atrocious man with bad tastes, so his son must be as well!"
"Hey! I re-"
"Yes, yes, I got it Usopp, he's not your father!" Nami ruffled her hair tiredly. "Franky will be your robot. You make up a lie believable enough to get this point across."
Usopp paused mid-rant and blinked at the greedy woman. "Me?"
"Of course, you dolt! Everything revolves around how good you can lie and fool them all until I steal all that beautiful money from the safe!" Nami declared, jumping to her feet. "And you people will have to play along with whatever Usopp makes up, got it?"
The sniper puffed his chest proudly. "Don't worry, I will make sure you kids will be covered. Master Usopp will take care of everything!"
"Nami!" Luffy's drawled, already half-bored and lost by the ongoing discussion. "What am I gonna be?"
The navigator shrugged. "A new recruit."
G-20 MARINE BASE
"You sure Franky's wooden planks will keep up the appearance?" Usopp asked nervously, pulling at his too tight shirt collar that was part of his Marine uniform. Which was more of a suit covered by a stolen 'Justice' coat and a rather fashionable brown hat that was somehow able to tame his curly locks. "Couldn't we just have taken that Navy ship we busted and drag the Sunny after us?"
"Too late for that." Nami said absently, checking her now blond hair in the mirror. "Besides, we used the same technique in G-8 and that time we only had your deplorable skills and it worked for a while. Franky's look a thousand times more believable."
Usopp twitched, but abstained from saying anything else. Instead, he surveyed the deck again and basked in the peculiar sight illuminated by the moon's rays and a few scattered lanterns they dared light on the ship.
Next to him, Nami was the most normal looking one, with a black skirt, pale pink shirt that was open at the neck and black heels. Only her blond hair was a major change that most of the Strawhats were still laughing about – though mostly silently after the major beating they received the first time around.
Luffy was jumping around in a standard Marine uniform, enjoying his last minutes with his precious straw hat as he will soon be trading it for a cap with the word 'Marine'. His scar has been covered over by Nami with a patch from Chopper's stash which he was threatened to keep on under all circumstances. The sniper concluded that his captain looked completely out of place in those pieces of clothing and would be really glad to not have to see him in them again. Chopper on the other hand, had already forgone his hat and was waiting for Nami's signal to transform into Walk Point and become a relatively normal looking reindeer.
Robin was dressed in a long black gown over which stood a 'Justice' coat. The attire looked eerily creepy in the silent night and her long, disheveled black strands covered almost all of her face save for a small opening for one of her eyes. A chill ran down Usopp's spine and he was sure it wasn't from the coldness of the night. Robin's visible eye was too amused to be innocent. He sincerely pitied their new subordinates as they would be the first victims of her morbid pranks.
The next group was a sight to behold. Besides the continuous wave of swears coming off from two of them, they looked laughably the same yet very different. The trio wore white coat-like robes and round-top tall rimmed hats over which a piece of paper with random scribbles, courtesy of Usopp, was attached so their faces were mostly obscured. Each of them carried swords – which a certain someone had almost resorted to gluing the hilts to the scabbards to keep the blades safe – at their waists. The weird image was uncannily that of Chinese undead soldiers and the sniper gulped back unconsciously, though that was the only thing worth getting scared over. As it was, Zoro's green hair still stuck out like a sore thumb – something which Nami still made sure to remind them of periodically along with her idea of dyeing said marimo locks. Unfortunately, she was not yet successful – Sanji's continuous smoking was burning more papers per hour than the long nosed man could produce and Brook's afro was living up to its untameable status. But it covered all the skeleton parts the high collar couldn't so it was a win-win situation in the end.
"Yow! Everybody looks good!" Franky exclaimed, looking around the deck in amusement. The shipwright was only wearing a black cloak to cover his massive form since Usopp still hasn't come up with a good lie to cover his appearance.
"You still haven't found one?" Nami asked incredulously, fighting to keep her strands still so she could attempt a braid.
Usopp grimaced. "Not yet." The woman rewarded him with a raised eyebrow. "What! I work better under pressure!"
"Then you're in luck, 'cause we're here." Zoro drawled, walking over to the railing.
His hand brushed the remaining hilt at his side – Wado Ichimonji's. Brook and Sanji joined him as well, having made it an amusing game of imitating him.
"To learn how to behave like a marimo, you must become one first.", the cook had said sagely, prompting the 'algae' in question to start attacking him.
Sanji grinned at the uncomfortable vibes Zoro emanated as he followed the swordsman, though with a noticeable misstep in his walk caused by Sandai Kitetsu strapped at his hip. Brook was handed Shuusui and the skeleton had made it his mission to make sure that nothing happened to the first mate's precious katana. He knew how damaging one's sword felt like and he'd rather not be careless. The musician attempted a faceless smile as he felt the warm and reassuring hum of his Soul Solid that he had been forced to jam inside his chest. It was either this or leaving it on the Sunny – something that did not quite sit comfortably with him.
"Alright, you remember the plan Franky." Nami said as she watched the towering form of the base take contour. "We'll be leaving the hiding of the Sunny to you."
The cyborg nodded, his grin never once ceasing.
Not more than half an hour later, they had already disembarked and were greeted with quite the big crowd of officers. Usopp watched the many faces full of resentment and squashed the urge to gulp again. Instead, he let the familiar feeling of getting into character overtake him and his imagination was already running miles per hour when he opened his mouth.
"Greetings!"
Beside him, Nami jumped slightly, taken by surprise at his booming voice.
"I am Commodore Marinaro from Marine Headquarters! I've been assigned here due to my father's promotion and sudden death. You can call me Marino. Let's make this base worth the billion Berri it had just received as funding, boys!"
Half hearted cries in agreement swiped through the crowd.
"Luffy, calm down!" Sanji's harsh whisper carried over to the sniper's ears and he sighed.
Couldn't escape forever.
"I forgot to introduce our newest recruit!" He said with fake enthusiasm. The Strawhats parted to allow their obnoxious captain through.
"This is Lucy and he's happy to meet you all! Now shoo." Usopp's efforts to move his captain proved useless. The rubber man stood staring at the crowd and they just stared right back at him with confused looks in their eyes.
"Shi-" A hand slapped the back of his head discreetly. "Nice to meet ya!"
The large grin made most blink.
"Marino-san." One of the officers in the front line addressed the rapidly sweating 'Commodore'. They should have known Luffy will be recognized at the first grin! Every marine would have already seen his bounty poster more than once. "Is he-"
"Ah no!" Usopp's shout echoed in the dark night and the man whished that Franky would return with the Sunny so they could get out of there. Sadly, a thing like that was impossible now and he'd lose his head if he did something to screw up the mission anyway, so the sniper only sighed in defeat. Outwardly, the long nosed man – whose nose had been bandaged because of reasons and he was wearing a pair of sunglasses in the dark for those same reasons – held out a halting hand and declared proudly.
"This is not who you think it is! Rather," he paused for dramatic effect and Luffy blinked up at him, clearly lost while Nami was trying to make him shut up through unobtrusive means, "this man you see in front of you is his one and only twin brother!"
Most of the marines' jaws hung open. Already used to absurd lies, Nami had luckily gotten a hold of herself in time to not appear more shocked than needed. On the other hand, the rest of the Strawhats' only saving blessings were the things covering their faces. Unfortunately, Chopper was the only one who had been taken by surprise and seen, but the shocked marine pointing at him had fainted at the 'shhh' the supposed pet had whispered to him.
"Y-You mean that is..." One began, looking at the teen in awe.
"Strawhat Luffy's twin brother?" A bulky man intoned, tears springing at the corners of his eyes.
"Indeed!" Usopp crossed his arms, a cocky smirk spreading on his lips. "Grown by the leaders of the world itself, the Celestial Dragons, he has been training in secret until now! I've been tasked with his supervision and safety by the Fleet Admiral himself! That is why," the sniper's eyes narrowed behind the glasses, which he promptly took off to add more effect, "I will be tasking you with the most important mission. You must keep this a secret and accept him as one of you!"
The soldiers cheered loudly and waved the raven head closer, hoping for a handshake and some words with this new sudden celebrity.
"At least try to not destroy the story I made up for you, okay?" Usopp whispered rapidly and pushed his captain towards his crazy fans.
"Is he going to be alright?" Brook wondered, watching the mob gathered around the raven head. "I should have seen this coming, though. Yohoho~"
"Well, he won't be amazingly recognizable now that his 'identity' is out in the open, even without his cap." Nami pinched the bridge of her nose. "I've made sure to pin his hair in place so he'll hopefully look unlike his wanted poster."
Usopp nodded in relief, though it was short-lived as he once again found himself pinned under the woman's glare.
"Twins?" Her growl was low enough to be covered by the crowd. "That was the best you could do?!"
Fortunately, Usopp was saved by Franky's impromptu arrival. The cyborg offered them thumbs up and grinned.
"What is that?!" A random marine found himself in need to point towards the cloaked figure.
"This is a new model for the Pacifista!" By now, the sniper's lies were flowing out smoothly like he had been rehearsing them for days. "Doctor Vegapunk himself entrusted this dangerous and powerful weapon to me to test it. Beware those of you who have a bounty poster!"
The entirety of G-20 laughed before throwing their arms up in the air and applauded their new leader.
The rest of the way between the docks and their new quarters passed by in a blur for the newly promoted pirate. They were shown most of the facilities in the base, such as the canteen – in which Luffy promptly sat down and ordered everything available – the doctor's office – by which time Chopper was pulling at his 'leash' ecstatically – the archives, in which Robin had silently vanished, the training rooms – where Zoro, and by default, Sanji and Brook stepped away from the group – and lastly, his office.
The room was amazingly bright and spacious with a large office desk placed near the balcony behind which stood a map of the New World region they were in and a couple of leftover bounty posters. Rows and rows of bookshelves filled with documents and other assorted paperwork rounded almost the whole room, save for the double glass doors to the outside and another, smaller, doorway through which his sleeping quarters resided.
Usopp had been awestruck at the notion that he wouldn't need to share with anyone – after all this time at sea, and even before, sharing had been ingrained into his being – and he never thought that he would live to see the day when he would be told that he got all that space for his own use and free access to the bathroom whenever he damn felt like it.
Swallowing down the urge to throw himself on the rather big and soft looking king-sized bed, the sniper faced his remaining crewmates that were not gone to mess up the base. Nami, Franky and Chopper stood silently, waiting for him to speak. He only half heard the goodnights the officers shouted or the doors swinging shut.
"I think I'll need to make you a costume like Kuma's." Usopp finally said to Franky.
The man nodded and offered another thumbs up before crossing his arms over his chest.
"I guess I'll be making my headquarters down at the docks." The shipwright considered.
"You should be careful, Franky. They might find the Sunny." Chopper said, speaking for the first time since stepping on Marine soil.
The cyborg nodded and offered a reassuring smile to their doctor. "Don't worry, bro. I'm more interested in researching Navy ships now that the opportunity had presented itself."
Nami's huff was the clear sign of impending doom.
"Those were some good lies right there. I'm impressed."
Usopp wasn't sure if he was more shocked that he hadn't received a blow to the head or that Nami had just complimented him.
"I still don't like it, though..." The doctor's lip jutted out in a cute way.
"I'm sorry, Chopper, but this is the only way you can pass as a normal part of the squad." The navigator patted his head softly.
"Don't you get it, Chopper?" Words burst from Usopp's mouth before he could stop them. "You are an integral part of the operation! Everything is depending on whether or not we'll be discovered, but when we will be..." Defying the laws of physics, one of his eyes blinked in mischief, "They will be too awed by the sight of the bravest warrior of the sea ridding on the back of his trusted friend into the sunset to do anything!"
His dramatic explanation made Nami roll her eyes and Franky chuckle, but left Chopper with mouth agape and eyes full of stars.
Nodding fervently, he smiled at his friend. "I got it! Leave it to me!"
"We'll see you tomorrow, Usopp." Nami said before departing along with the others.
Sighing tiredly, the sniper had eyes only for his bed. Barely managing to take off his coat and undo a couple of buttons, he threw himself on the bed and fell asleep before his head hit the pillow.
"Uso-"
SLAP
Rushed whispers.
"Marino-san! Wake up!"
Usopp stirred and groaned in his sleep, cracking an eye long enough to glance at the conveniently placed clock on his nightstand before going back to sleep. It took his tired brain a couple more seconds before he realized how late the time was.
With a mighty yelp, the sniper effectively jumped out of the bed and sped to the bathroom before proceeding to dart about the room like a sheep without head.
"What the hell are you doing?" A female voice stopped his random running and he looked up to see a blonde version of his crewmate along with his disguised captain.
The shock came when he realized that Luffy was still dressed as a Marine and no alarm was on.
"I know, I was surprised, too. It seems like our captain can understand things like being inconspicuous." The navigator grinned cheekily at the pout on the rubber man's face.
"Those guys in my room are no fun! I wanna share with Usopp!" The raven head whined. "He has enough room."
"Well-" Usopp scratched his head, truly wanting to say yes, but Nami was not on the same thought wave.
"No." The woman said firmly. "You are a new recruit, you can't receive special treatment. Especially since Usopp himself had told them that they should treat you like every other new guy coming here."
Luffy threw the sniper a weak glare that was met with a shrug.
"Now come on, you will miss what is left of breakfast and you can't work on an empty stomach!"
Ironically, Usopp's stomach dropped at her words.
THREE DAYS LATER
Giant fish, tornadoes, islands that spit fire and ice, killing gas and too many madmen to count and I will ultimately meet my demise by paperwork, Usopp thought disdainfully, watching the white skyscraper swish mockingly in the light breeze coming from the outside. It didn't help that the weather was basically heavenly and very rare to see in the New World. Perfect for a full day of navigating, but no. They had to infiltrate this stupid base so Nami wouldn't kill them and whine about it for years afterwards. And of course, Usopp had to be stuck here, his job easily the most scarring given his dynamic nature. He hated the orange haired woman for this and he hated Luffy for giving in so easily.
And he hated this base and the stupid paperwork.
Not for the first time, he was glad that he had chosen the life of a pirate. Marines had to deal with too much shit and even less action in his opinion. Sighing in exasperation, the man picked his discarded pen back up and started scribbling his new fake signature on the papers left in front of him. Those illiterate scrawls would surely raise many questions when the documents will arrive at Headquarters, but he could care less in that moment. He didn't intend to send them in yet and he was sure as hell that by the time those idiots realized something was amiss, they will be well gone from here. Surely the Marine organization couldn't keep track of everyone within it.
"Usopp, I'm bored..." Chopper drawled from his spot on the ground next to his quarters' doorway. The reindeer was strewn across a blanket on the ground, looking relaxed and content with the world.
Usopp knew this wasn't the case. His friend was suffering from the same thing he did – sea withdrawal. It was truly taking a toll on them all. His eyes fell on his hand – still in the middle of scribbling another signature – and back to his friend and he grinned.
Throwing the pen away to the other side of the room, the sniper stood up and walked over to his bored friend and crouched down with a grin.
"How about we take a walk then?"
Chopper's face broke into a happy smile and the reindeer nodded and jumped to his feet. Usopp had only time to catch the end of his leash before he was dragged out of the room by the excited doctor.
"Where should we go first?" Chopper asked a few minutes later as they patrolled the halls. By now they had learned most of the important places.
Usopp almost had a heart attack, but sighed in relief when he saw that no one was in sight.
"Calm down, I learned to always make sure before speaking." His friend said, obviously having repeated the same thing a couple more times.
"How about the cafeteria? I'm a little hungry." Usopp admitted, patting his growling stomach pointedly. "Then we can take a look outside."
Chopper nodded and maneuvered through a couple more corridors before they arrived at another set of double doors. Usopp pushed them open and what greeted them was, summed in one word, anarchy. And in the centre of it all was, again, unsurprisingly, their captain.
"Commodore Marino!" One of the bulky ones from the Bulk squad – as dubbed by Chopper – appeared on his right, looking more or less horrified and full of former edible things.
"What is this?" The sniper appealed to his most dangerous tone.
"S-Sir!" The bigger man stuttered, leaving Usopp baffled in his wake. "Lucy-sama is eating everything again!"
Again, huh.
"Wait, 'Lucy-sama'?" The man raised an eyebrow, clearly asking the guy what the hell was that all about.
"That's how everyone calls him. He is our hidden weapon against that Strawhat after all. I'm sure no one, not even the Fleet Admiral, had held such precious information in his hands until recently. When he will be ready, the Strawhat Pirates would certainly be annihilated!"
The casual way he was speaking did not reassure Usopp in the least and actually forced him to reconsider some of his lies. Now he knew that most of them were complete bullshit through and through, but there were times when they ultimately proved to become true. The sniper shuddered involuntarily and he sent a mental prayer to any deity free enough to pay attention to it that it wouldn't end up with his captain having to confront his marine twin under the protection of the Nobles. That would be the mess of the century, especially since Luffy would be very conflicted about it.
"... I mean, how does he even fit that all in his stomach?" Bulky was saying, though he only managed to catch the last part of his question.
The man pointed to the balloon caricature seated at one of the long tables, gorging down all the food in sight.
"Marino-san!" A man exited what could only be the kitchen. "Please say something to Lucy-sama. We have just restocked two days ago, but if this continues we will have to restock again by tomorrow!"
Usopp sighed and massaged his temples.
"Chopper, you go ahead and eat without me. I will come in a few minutes."
Bulky and the cook blinked when the reindeer seemed to nod and walk off in the direction its master ordered it to, but they shrugged it off as one of their new Commodore's skills of training his pets. Unlike his stupid father, who let his tiger loose on the new recruits. That had been part of the reason they received that large sum of money in the first place. Too many men fell at the paws of that beast. Even pirates usually dealt a lot less damage.
"Lucy!" Usopp called as he slid in the seat opposite his captain's. The raven head stopped in his mad dash to wait for him to continue. The sniper grimaced. He didn't like to keep his friend from gorging everything down – hell, he couldn't care less! – but their mission rang clearly in his head. And worse, it was in Nami's voice.
"Please stop eating everything. These guys will get suspicious." He hoped his whisper carried over to the other side of the table.
Luffy blinked but nodded slowly. "Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to get you in trouble."
"That's not the problem." Usopp shook his head, watching his friend search for a glass of water to wash down all that grime from his meals. "But Nami still hasn't managed to breach that thing. She and Franky have been trying every day and even I went there once, but the lock is a little too complicated. And of course she wouldn't call off the mission!"
A rubber hand stretched to unnatural lengths towards a stray glass at the edge of the table.
"Say what, I will let you eat everything you want before we leave here if you behave in front of these idiots."
Luffy mirrored his sniper's grin and he nodded again, hopping off the bench. "Yosh, I'm going to train!" The rubber man threw his hands up in the air, but Bulky speaking behind them stopped his exit.
"What was that?"
"What was what?" Usopp snapped, not in the mood to deal with morons.
"He just stretched his hand to the end of the table." The man made a sweeping motion with his index finger in demonstration. "And then it snapped back like a rubber band."
The sniper abstained from slamming his forehead hard on the table. Instead, he let a devilish grin split his face and stood up.
"Gentlemen," he paused dramatically, dragging his finger on the surface of the table as he walked along it, "you have just discovered another amazing anomaly of this world we live in called the Greater Powers or the Wills of the Ages."
Most officers looked confused, but Usopp plowed on without fear.
"It has been discovered and demonstrated by our very own Lucy that Devil Fruits can affect both twins." Several gasps echoed through the room. "You see, because twins usually have an innate ability of telepathy, the Devil Fruits simply transmit their powers through that. So please excuse our dear Lucy here for his sudden demonstration, but indeed, you have just witnessed the legendary 'Gomu Gomu no Mi' and its powers!"
A short-lived silence settled before it was broken by a brave soul.
"But sir, I have a twin and I've eaten a Devil Fruit, but he doesn't have my powers!"
Usopp mentally kicked himself. Time for Plan B.
"Are you fraternal or identical twins?"
The officer blinked. "Fraternal, sir."
His superior allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief at the information. They still had a way out.
"Well, it's obvious it won't work! This only works on identical twins because they have stronger mental bonds!"
His bluffing paid off when one after the other, the marines all nodded and resumed their business. Usopp gave Luffy a nod and a smile which the pirate captain reciprocated.
The sound of the doors closing guided Usopp to Chopper's table. Well, the table next to where Chopper was eating. From a bowl on the ground. Needless to say, there have been enough shouting matches about this before the doctor had been mellowed down somewhat at the notion that his sacrifice will pay off in the near future.
"I don't have to be a doctor to know that what you said is simply impossible." The reindeer whispered and Usopp stifled a snort.
"Cut me some slack. How was I supposed to explain it to them? That idiot can't stay inconspicuous to save his life!" He complained, playing with his food. This stew didn't look so amazing, but he could easily see that Sanji had a hand in making the sauce. It was the only and best part of the food.
Chopper masked his laughter by taking another bite from his meal. Usopp had made it clear that the reindeer was to be served whatever the recruits ate, saving him from the dooming fate of having to eat whatever disgusting animal food these people kept here.
They ate in silence for a few minutes before Usopp had wiped the bowl clean of sauce and took a few more bites from the meat before deciding he had had enough and sat up. By then Chopper had finished with his meal and was waiting for him patiently, very unlike his normal self who would be jumping around full of energy.
"How about the training rooms now?" The sniper asked and his friend nodded, guiding him easily to their destination.
It was no surprise to see Zoro in the middle of lifting up huge weights in his arms.
"Oh, you guys are here." Sanji's voice coming from their left distracted the two long enough to glance away from the suddenly stumbling form of the green haired man.
"Goddamn, can't you knock?!" Zoro grunted, picking himself up from the floor.
"Why is he so shocked?" Chopper asked innocently.
The blond cook snorted and took another drag from his cigarette before answering.
"He's always on edge since he discarded his disguise."
Now that Usopp was looking again, it was true. Brook and Sanji had taken their hats off as well, but only Zoro was the most exposed, being in the centre of the room and in only his pants.
"You guys have been here for three days?" The fake Commodore asked incredulously.
"Not at all. We've been travelling to and fro from the kitchen to the training rooms and sometimes we take refreshing walks outside. I always feel more energized after inhaling the fresh air... though I don't have any lungs. Yohoho!" Brook's joke was a little anti-climatic, but the two pirates were already used to them.
"By the way, Usopp." Sanji calling his name turned his attention away from scolding Zoro about his clothes. "Did you know that there's a town on the other side of the mountain?"
The sniper blinked and shook his head. "No. I'm surprised Nami didn't tell us."
"Probably didn't know. Stupid witch, marching in unprepared." The swordsman mumbled around the new weight in his mouth.
"Don't you call Nami-swan that, you stupid algae brain!" Sanji was immediately on his feet and glaring.
Zoro glared right back and Brook sighed audibly through his nonexistent lungs.
Usopp shook his head and glanced at Chopper.
"I think we're done here."
The reindeer laughed audibly and followed his friend out of the room.
"Oh, Usopp, Chopper!"
The two jumped in surprise and shrieked loudly when a dark form suddenly loomed over them threateningly. Usopp had his cross out in a flash and was whispering chants to banish evil spirits while Chopper stood trembling behind him when the figure spoke again.
"What are you two doing on the ground?"
As fast as it came, the image cleared and they were standing once again in the hallway. Robin stared down at the two in confusion and Usopp felt his face flare.
"Sorry, it was an exercise in case bad spirits would appear." The sniper jumped to his feet and cleared his throat awkwardly. "What are you doing around here?"
The archaeologist smiled and beckoned them towards a door farther down from the training room. It was at the end of the hallway and looked unused to say the least. Spider webs hung from the bookshelves and the floor was so dusted that their footsteps left prints with each step.
"What's in here, Robin?" Usopp asked, a note of fear entering his voice.
"These are the Archives." The black haired woman informed them, closing the door and tucking her hair away from her face and behind her ear. "One of the rooms, actually. From what I gathered, this is the third oldest one."
"There are more rooms for Archives?" Chopper perched up at the information.
"Yes, it seems that this base was one of the first ones to be created by the Marine organization." Robin explained, moving along the shelves to the other side of the room. "I've been reading the logs and everything of interest that I could find stacked in here."
"Did you find something?" Usopp questioned as he and Chopper followed her.
"Not yet." Her voice was soft, almost mingling with the dust in the air. "But I have a feeling this base isn't just a useless piece of junk in the middle of the New World." Robin's words stopped as abruptly as her steps.
"Robin?" The doctor looked up at his crewmate worriedly.
"Actually, I did find something." She conceded in the end with a small sigh. "But I will need you two to keep this quiet."
"The chances of it actually happening are very low anyway."
Usopp sighed as he dragged himself down the stairs behind Chopper, walking deeper into the base.
"I don't know if I want it to happen or not..." The sniper whined.
"Don't worry. Robin said that it probably won't." Chopper tried to reassure his friend, but somehow managed to make the sniper's mood degrade even further.
"State your name and business here." A robotic voice cut their conversation short.
"Franky, it's us!" The reindeer cried excitedly, galloping towards the blue haired cyborg.
Franky's metallic shoulders sagged in relief and he gave them a weak smile.
"Yo!"
"How's it going?" Usopp asked, brushing off his earlier depression.
By the looks of it, the thieving wasn't going so well. The corridor was full of scattered pieces of metal and other instruments that might have been tools to get it to open, but was now only junk. In front of the thick door of the safe itself, the floor was even more a mess than the rest of the space. Even open books were thrown here and there, making it a veritable obstacle ride.
"Not good." There was clear irritation in the shipwright's voice. "You should try tonight again, too."
The sniper nodded and scratched his head, carefully maneuvering around the junk on the floor in order to get closer to the current thing causing them headaches.
"I don't get how it can be this unbreachable!"
Chopper nodded fervently from behind. "You guys broke into G-8's safe that was supposed to be a fortress!"
"Yeah... and it was even more complicated than this one." Usopp whispered, his eyes searching for any hint that they might have overlooked.
"Where's Nami?" The pirate doctor asked after a few moments of silence.
"She went back to Usopp's office to search inside the documents. Maybe there's something written in there." Franky explained, sitting down on the tiled floor. "By the way, bro. You should place me here fulltime from now on. Maybe I will be able to find something if I go wild. Might get Nami out of here for a change, too."
"She's been here the whole time?" Chopper intoned incredulously, concern written all over his face.
The cyborg's only answer was a pointed thumb in the direction of a door they hadn't noticed until then. It was only slightly open, but the reindeer could clearly make out its true purpose. A broom closet. Nami has been sleeping in a broom closet for three days.
"That woman's crazy, I'm telling you." Usopp shook his head, turning his back towards the damned source of all their problems in defeat. "Let's get out of here, Chopper. I will make sure to announce them, Franky! You just make sure we get this open before we really become Marines."
Franky chuckled and nodded as he watched them climb up the stairs.
The duo was almost at the exit of the base when a small crowd down the hall attracted their attention. Three soldiers were fighting a losing battle, and in the middle of it all, was Nami. Her blonde hair was disheveled and she had one fist dangerously close to a man's face and a fiery scowl on her face.
"What's happening here?" Using his most authoritative voice, Usopp approached the small commotion. "What has my poor secretary done to you people?"
One of the freer officers turned around and saluted. "Sir! We found her looking through the documents inside your office and generally making a mess out of the room."
The sniper's eyebrow twitched, but he offered a reassuring smile, surprising the soldiers.
"Ah, she was acting on my orders. I granted her permission, though I don't believe the mess was part of them." He glared at the navigator and the woman huffed and returned the favor.
"Are you sure, sir?" Another random soul that he had never seen asked uncertainly.
Usopp nodded and patted one of the closest one's back. "Yes, don't worry about it. Also, please inform everyone that the safe hall is off-limits from now on. I ordered the Pacifista to guard it as a form of test. If you don't wish to be obliterated, I suggest you and everyone else stay away from that sector."
The three looked shocked, but nodded nonetheless and made their way back into the base.
"You could be at least a little inconspicuous. And you're telling Luffy he's not..." The pirate said, watching Nami with a puzzled look. "You look awful." He added as an afterthought.
"Are you okay, Nami?" Seeing the coast was clear, Chopper spoke quietly.
The blonde woman sighed and all but slumped to the floor. Her crewmates were alarmed by the behavior and crouched down to help her.
"It's no use. I can't find anything there either!" Nami's voice quivered and not for the first time Usopp saw how much effort she was putting into this thieving.
"Are you sure you searched everywhere?" The sniper asked as he guided her outside under the sun and sat her down on a nearby bench.
"Not really everywhere, but I've searched enough places where it might have been and found nothing."
"You can't give up, Nami!" Usopp cried quietly, eyeing the patrolling recruits and the training groups wearily. "We're all here with you. I'll take a look again tonight and Franky's staying there from now on. We'll get that billion even if we have to attack together and destroy it!"
As if to accentuate his words, Luffy's shout was heard from the background and they turned to see the rubber man bounce up and down to the amusement of the other recruits. Usopp was by now convinced that these people were too trusting and stupid or else he couldn't figure out how their plan had worked so well for three days.
The blonde looked up with wide eyes and a smile slowly bloomed on her face. With renewed hope and vigor, she stood up abruptly from the bench.
"Yeah, I can do it! Thanks for the help, guys." Throwing one last grin at the two and her distracted captain, Nami made her way back into the base and out of sight.
"Commodore Marino!" One of the patrolling guards approached and Usopp immediately slipped into role.
"Yes?"
"Sir!" The man saluted once again, stopping a few paces from his seat. "The townspeople are insisting to meet and welcome you to the base. They will be preparing a feast tomorrow and requested that you join them."
Usopp considered it for a moment. It shouldn't be bad and he'd be able to give everyone a little break from the continuous tension they've been living in. Being in a Marine base was taking its toll on them all. Even Zoro was being jumpy and Luffy was actually listening to orders.
"Alright! We'll make sure to be there."
NEXT DAY
"And it's a good chance to patrol the town, too!" The fake Commodore was saying as he led the Strawhats down the mountain path.
In front and behind them, four marine officers were keeping an eye out for any danger, though they only proved to be nuances to the disguised pirates.
Nami puffed her cheeks but said nothing. After yesterday's boost of confidence, she was itching to do some more digging inside his office. Needless to say, Usoppp didn't think he would ever get around to tidying that utter mess up.
"One of the best ideas you could come up with, Usopp-san. It will be a great way to enjoy ourselves! Yohoho!" Brook spoke quietly from between Zoro and Sanji. The musician had made it his personal mission to keep these two from starting an argument and destroying their covers.
"Whohoo! I can't wait for the feast!" Luffy predictably cried out, surprising the four marines. The pirate kept jumping up and down with his hands in the air and Usopp counted the seconds until he'd trip and roll down the hill.
He felt Chopper nudge his hand and he looked down to see the doctor offer a small smile and he grinned back.
"Indeed. It's going to be interesting." Robin spoke from the back of the group and the sniper saw the officers shudder quite violently.
Seems like Robin's been occupied, the long nosed man snickered, though he could somehow sympathize with them, seeing as even he'd be having nightmares for a while. Robin with her hair over her face and a black coat was not a good idea. The only thing missing thing from the horrifying image was a butcher's knife full of blood.
Fortunately for the men keeping up the rear, Franky was acting like a barrier, his steady steps being more loud and forceful in order to imitate the Pacifista.
Luffy cheered as the small town came into view. It wasn't bigger than his own village, Usopp thought, suddenly nostalgic, though being incased in the gulf surely made it seem bigger and more compact. The rows of houses built in the rocky mountain surface had each a little garden of its own where trees and flowers grew. The constructions themselves were simplistic, but they had a cozy air about them that made the sniper feel welcomed and at ease. The village itself stopped at the beginning of the small stretch of white sand and beyond the beach, the ocean's waters lingered calm in the high sun bathing the wooden docks. The small town divided exactly at its middle in a square where a fountain was visible, encircled by shops and stalls.
"Pirate ship detected." Franky's drawled announcement destroyed the positive mood hanging over them.
The marines stiffened and readied their guns.
"Sir! Should we return to the base and take reinforcements?" One of them asked, eyes dancing between the skull and bones flag to his superior.
Usopp gulped. He wasn't sure if they would be able to deal with them without fighting, but maybe they had a chance of scaring them away.
"Anyone important?" He asked the general audience.
"Don't think so..." Nami whispered.
"I've never seen their flag, but they must be pretty powerful to be able to survive the New World." Robin stepped closer to the sniper, her visible eye alight with curiosity.
Usopp resisted the urge to pinch the bridge of his nose.
"We might be able to deal with them so let's just go. While we take reinforcements the pirates could very well leave. Plus, we can't be late for the feast."
The four marines blinked at their superior's relaxed attitude. They were doubtful of his positive overlook of the situation, especially since he was new to his post.
"Sir, are you sure?" One of them asked, clearly doubtful. "The pirates travelling these parts are quite powerful."
The men blinked again when the Commodore stumbled over thin air, but any amusement was wiped from their minds when they heard the foreboding giggle of the 'Lady in Black', as dubbed between the lower ranks, and they resisted the urge to shiver and make a run for it. Ever since she came back, that strange woman had been even more sadistic in her prank choices, not to mention that all of them dreaded the night shift. Walking through the corridors at midnight and meeting with that was enough to give anyone nightmares. Especially when several bonus limbs sprouted from her form as she talked.
"Yes, yes, don't worry!" Usopp said quickly, cursing his inattentiveness inside his mind. With newfound determination, he moved to the front of the group and started the descent towards the first row of houses. Luffy ran to catch up with his friend, eyes alight with newfound interest.
"Lucy." Pinned raven bangs moved as their owner regarded him curiously. Usopp took the time to place his sunglasses back in place. "If it looks to be going bad, use Conqueror's to knock them out."
Luffy nodded, grinning.
"And put your cap back on, please."
"Eh? What did'ya bastard say ta meh?"
Usopp's eye pulsed dangerously at the utter show of idiocy and he quickly concluded that this was one of those pirate crews that got off easy in the New World because the greater forces had taken pity on them and decided that the world was still in need of idiots to walk its lands. Else he couldn't explain how someone could answer like that to his simple request. He had mustered up all the manners he had ever learned to appear polite and unthreatening – a little too unthreatening, now that he thought about it – to the relatively medium-sized pirate crew. Their ship was barely bigger than the Sunny and their captain hardly older than them, yet he was an idiot no matter how you put it. And not an idiot like Luffy – no, he was leagues off in that aspect – but a through and through idiot that couldn't distinguish people being friendly from enemies. It didn't help that he gave off the air of someone only thinking about saving his own skin.
Two thugs stepped forward with their utterly horrible smells and Usopp felt compelled to take a step back. His nostrils didn't deserve the torment.
Wait, since when did I begin to be so picky? Am I beginning to be too in character?! Or is it that the smell can easily compete with one of corpses in decay? Do these guys not have showers or what?
Seeing as even Luffy, who was the closest to them besides him, was scrunching up his nose in disgust, he sighed in relief. So he wasn't the only one.
"Now you see? This is why I don't like Marines!" The captain said, ruffling his disheveled brown hair with his dirtied hand. "They think they're better than everyone, but all pirates know they are just pushovers that can't do any damage. Let me tell you something!"
The man declared, opening his arms wide and facing the crowds of villagers gathered in a wide circle around them. All of their faces were white as sheets and scared, especially since the pirates had been close to setting fire to their homes when the group stepped in.
"Those who join the Marines are weak! They are those too scared and weak to pursue the life of a pirate! To live a man's one true way to greatness: becoming the conqueror of all seas!" The man looked at the fake marines pointedly. "The New World doesn't scare me, I was born here! And if I can control it, then I can do the same to Paradise and the Blues!" Grey eyes glinted in the fiery sunrays. "And the one who controls them will ultimately become the Pirate King! We already have a lead to Raftel. With my navigational skills, I can make Pirate King in a week!" His head fell back in a sudden burst of laughter which was echoed all around by his crewmates.
The crowds shifted restlessly, all faces horrified.
Luffy's eyes were shadowed by his cap and it looked as intimidating as always, though the Strawhats collectively decided that the yellow straw hat would have added more effect.
"You're playing a dangerous game." The rubber man's words tumbled throughout the suddenly silent square.
The brown haired man cocked an eyebrow, surprised that anyone would have the gall to argue with him.
"Don't forget that you aren't the only ones sailing on this ocean. Every pirate setting out for the Grand Line wants to become Pirate King, but it would be a stupid quest if it would be so easy. Useless thugs assaulting towns and destroying peoples' lives don't have the right to call themselves kings of the ocean! Not while I'm around!" A powerful force-like wave erupted from the pirate captain as he locked gazes with the shocked man. In a split of second, every man on his crew was down on the ground, foaming at the mouth.
"What..." For the first time, the man was sweating bullets and looking at Luffy in fear.
"You should do well to remember those words." Usopp found himself saying before the man's eyes rolled to the back of his head and his body hit the ground hard. "Good job, Lucy." The sniper winked and his captain grinned back.
Cheers erupted after a few choking seconds of the remaining silence and the villagers swarmed around them, offering thanks and a million greetings per second. Usopp found himself a little overwhelmed, but things quickly settled into a party rhythm and he found himself not long after sundown sitting on a log near the large campfire, gazing at it deep in thought.
"Sir!" One of the officers that were with them earlier today approached, standing rigidly in front of him.
Usopp nodded his head reflexively.
"We've been thinking about Lucy-sama's words."
This piece of information did not sit quite right with Usopp. In a split second, his earlier melancholy melted into fear. Did they read too much into it? Had Luffy really said too much?
"And we believe he was right."
Usopp exhaled in relief.
"Being Strawhat Luffy's twin brother and growing up with the Celestial Dragons was sure to make him very powerful, but he has surprised us today. He simply had to glare at them and those pirates dropped down like flies. His words inspired us and we'll follow you and him forever!" Suddenly, the other three marines were behind the first one. The quartet bowed as one with noticeable teary eyes and said.
"We will inform everyone at the base of our superiors' feat!"
The sniper blinked and nodded slowly, not quite sure what had happened. One thing he was sure of, though: now they had to add a marine base to their growing list of followers.
Looking back at Luffy's partying form, he couldn't help but smile. He was really the only one who could really enjoy the feast as it was. Zoro was content drinking beer while leaning on a nearby log. Brook had conspicuously gotten a violin from somewhere and was contributing to the music, but the sniper could feel Sanji's glower and his restlessness. The cook had really wanted to study this village's recipes, but his companions sadly didn't. Though Usopp knew that at some point he had been wandering around alone. Franky had disappeared at some point, presumably to steal whatever he could from the defeated pirates and haul their asses back on their ship before lifting the anchor and letting them be taken by the currents to somewhere. If they were lucky, none of them would die before they woke up. Usopp knew that Luffy's blast had been a touch more powerful than truly needed, but the sniper could sympathize with him.
Nami was in the middle of a drinking contest, while Robin had opted to join Zoro and Brook on the log. The archaeologist was patting Chopper's head pityingly while the reindeer quietly sniveled about the unfairness of the world. Usopp tried to form a reassuring smile, but found his lips sealed tightly instead. He was really starting to regret taking part in this mission. All things considered, it was a matter of time before something big would happen. And Usopp wasn't sure if he was prepared for that.
A/N: Yo!
So this is my tribute to the awesome filler arc of G-8 xD If you hadn't seen it, you should give it a shot. Lots of fun moments!
Obviously this won't be as good as the arc in itself, but I will try and hope! Though it will certainly be very different! So don't place it under the copied-from-the-episodes category, 'cause it's not (if there is one of those...)
Anyway, this is me hurrying to post all my finished fics before school comes to punch me in the face D;
I hope you enjoyed the first chapter! Don't forget to leave a review with your thoughts!
Until next time~