Hello everyone :) This is my first attempt at writing an English fan fiction. Please feel free to bring any grammar mistake/wrong choice of words/typing errors etc. you find to my attention as English is my third language and I'd like to improve my language skills. Many thanks in advance and have fun reading this little story.
What keeps us apart
The fourth ninja world war was officially over. No more fighting, no more killing. There were no enemies surrounding us in this hospital room, no one was waiting for an opportunity to ambush us. Nevertheless I wanted to appear strong – for Sakura. But looking at you Sasuke ... I simply couldn't.
Sasuke's face was covered by a white cloth but I could still see him before my inner eye: a proud Uchiha, strong-willed and brave, a young man who walked his path to the bitter end. An unconditional avenger who didn't let anybody keep him from reaching his lifetime goal. A member of Team 7. My best friend.
Our friendship was deeper and more complex than anything I had ever experienced. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't put my feelings towards Sasuke into words. Our relationship was more complicated than all these boring theories Kakashi-sensei had taught me throughout the years. You had to feel it for yourself in order to understand it. No jutsu in this world, no theory and no finger signs could help me describe it.
"Sakura-chan?", I said in a low voice. "Did Tsunade-baa-chan tell you when Sasuke will be buried?"
Sakura didn't respond. Not even a sigh left her mouth. She just stood there, looking out of the window as if she hadn't heard me. The red light of the setting sun was falling on her face, painting a redish shadow over her skin. She almost looked like the pre-war Sakura: full of life and without this ghostly lividity. But I knew that this was just a disceiving picture drawn by the fraudulent sun who would soon be leaving us in the dark and confront us with the cruel reality. Sakura would never be the same again. War changes people – and it had not only changed Sakura but all of us.
"He, Sakura-chan", I tried again but she didn't even pay attention to me. Instead, she all of the sudden buried her face in her hands and started crying, cutting the dead silence and reminding me of the fact that it was my fault ... If I had been strong enough, Sasuke would still be alive and Sakura wouldn't be crying her eyes out in this very moment.
I'm so sorry, Sakura ...
"Sasuke ...", she cried. She was trembling like Konoha's leaves in stormy nights.
"Sakura-chan?"
"Naruto ... I'm so sorry", she addressed me and wiped the tears from her cheeks even though she couldn't stop crying.
"It's not your fault, Sakura-chan, believe it! I am the one who should be apologizing. I promised you to bring Sasuke home but I failed ..." I bowed my head, feeling ashamed of my weakness that had lead to the death of my best friend.
"If I could only turn back the hands of time!", she said and put her fingers on the pane of glass. "I wish I had never asked you for that promise back then, Naruto. Things would have turned out differently, I'm sure. It's all my fault."
"That's not true and you know it! You didn't do anything wrong, believe it!"
The sun vanished behind the silver stripe of the horizon and darkness began to spread over Konoha. It was dead silent in Sasuke's hospital room with neither one of us speaking. Sakura was still looking out of the window with those green teary eyes which no longer reminded me of the forest – as it did before the war – but of broken leaves. The more signs of sadness and grief I discovered on her, the more I hated myself. But hating myself wouldn't bring Sasuke back to life or make Sakura happy again. All I could do now was to be there for her until the day I died. I wouldn't allow anybody to hurt her.
I walked over to her and leaned against the wall, observing the trees in the garden of the hospital which were vibrating like the silver strings of a harp. Seeing Sakura's face from up close, made a shiver run through me. Her tears had dried but there was something in her mimic that worried me. I didn't know how to call it. It was more than the indifference I knew from Kakashi-sensei and more than the coldness Sasuke had shown so often. Even though she was standing right beside me, it felt like as if she wasn't present ... It was weird, believe it.
"Sakura-chan? Stupid question but are you okay?"
As expected, she didn't react in any way. What was wrong with her? Was this what people call emotional state of shock?
"Do you want a glass of water?", I asked her. But – nothing. She ignored me and just kept staring into the dusk with that frozen mien.
Maybe it was a good idea to leave her alone for a while. If she was in an emotional state of shock, she would recover herself. Definitely. Otherwise I would call Tsunade-baa-chan for help. I didn't want Sakura to get sick although I could understand her pain so goddamn well; ever since I had seen so many of our friends lose their live on the battle field of the Fourth World War, every one of my breaths hurt.
It was pitch-dark by now; you could hardly recognize anything more than silhouettes of people passing by the hospital walls like ghosts. Or the outlines of houses and fences. Nevertheless Sakura's eyes were still fixated on outside.
"Sakura-chan", I said in a soft tone of voice, "are you coming? The others need our help."
Her head tilted forwards and she heaved a deep sigh while her hands were sliding down the window pane.
"Why?", she asked. She had sounded so depressed and heartbroken that I couldn't speak for a moment; the words got stuck in my throat like stones. Besides, she appeared to be in deep thoughts. That's why I even considered the possibility that she hadn't actually talked to me but to someone only she could hear. Maybe she was even having a conversation with someone in her head.
Possibly with Sasuke ...
"Well, because there are still dozens of ninjas who still need treatment, believe it!", I nevertheless replied in my typical tone of voice. I wanted to convey a feeling of normalcy because our world was falling into pieces. And I wanted to give her the hope that we could go back to how things were before – without the shadow of deaths over our lives.
Obviously I failed at giving her that hope as she just sighed and went to the bathroom. I could hear her open the water tap and splash the water into her face or clean her hands. When she came out, I noticed that she had rolled up her sleeves and brushed her hair. She looked less exhausted and sad now.
"Do you feel any better?", I asked.
She tied her hitae-ate around her forehand and murmured: "That water put some life into myself, I should have done that hours ago."
"Okay, now let's go to Shizune and Tsunade-baa-chan to help", I pushed her before I added more calmly: "Trust me, we will have an entire life to mourn Sasuke. But for now, we need to pull ourselves together."
Even though I was pushing her to go and help all the wounded shinobi, I really just wanted her to go home and have some rest. But I knew that she wouldn't do it even if I begged her.
"Here we go!", she said and softly clapped her cheeks a couple of times before giving Sasuke a casual glance.
"That's the spirit, Sakura-chan!"
Before we made one step towards the door, someone knocked on it, and before we had any chance to say come in, that someone opened it.
"Kakashi-sensei?", I said, wrinkling my forehead. I was surprised to see him walking around with that damaged knee. He didn't only limp but he also had both of his hands bandaged and a big patch on his forehead. He looked pretty battered.
Before even saying one word to us, he glanced over to Sasuke. He closely looked him over, showing a carelessness in his eyes that would have irritated me had I not known the fact that Kakashi-sensei was just brilliant at disguising his true feelings. I knew that he, in fact, did care about Sasuke and that he was just as sad as Sakura and I about his death. After all, we were Team 7. The four of us together.
However, I felt like as if Kakashi-sensei was thinking about a separate issue while eyeing Sasuke's dead body. His face – or rather the part of it that you could actually see – didn't have that soft expression it usually had when he was not on the battle field fighting. It seemed like as if he was strongly focused on something. I didn't know what to make of his behavior. What confused me even more was when he began to examine the room with a wrinkled forehead.
I followed his glance through the room but couldn't find anything unusual; it was a boringly normal hospital room. (Not that I could see much as we hadn't switched on the lights and the sun had already set.)
"Anything wrong, sensei?", I finally asked.
He looked in my direction but he was focused on something that was behind me. When I turned around, I could find nothing but a landscape art hanging on the wall.
"What's wrong?", I asked again.
"I am sensing energy fluctuations", he said in a deep and low voice, still highly concentrated.
"Energy flucutations?", I repeated in disbelieve. I closed my eyes and used my sensor skills to check if Kakashi-sensei was right. If an enemy was lying in ambush even though the war was over, I would find out.
"I'm not sensing anything unusual", I said after a couple of seconds and opened my eyes. "You must be wrong."
Kakashi-sensei darted a last wary glance in my direction before he turned away and smiled in embarassment. "I guess my chakra tricked me. Seems like I am still a little confused from all the things that happened in the past days."
"I'm not surprised", Sakura said and walked over to him. I followed her, stopping one step before Kakashi-sensei. Seeing him from up close, I noticed that he really didn't look great. The war had definitely taken its toll on him albeit not as heavy as it had on Sakura. Thinking of Obito, I could only imagine how deep Kakashi-senseis pain was. But as usual, he didn't show how much he suffered. Kakashi-sensei was different from Sakura and me: he hid his pain away from others.
"Sakura, do you think you are in the condition to help the other medic nins to take care of all the wounded warriors?", Kakashi-sensei asked.
"We were just about to go, right, Sakura-chan?", I said before she could give a reply. I was hoping to change her mind in case she planned on denying Kakashi-sensei's request. I wanted her to be too busy to think of Sasuke as I could no longer endure seeing her extremely sad face.
"Yes ... of course", she answered. "Is somebody going to take care of the casualties? They have to be brought to the funeral parlor as soon as possible."
I was just about to say something when Kakashi-sensei gave an answer.
"Yes, some volunteers have already begun to do that. But it's still gonna take a while before they show up here." He put a hand on Sakura's shoulder and squeezed it softly. "It's time to say goodbye."
A painful smile appeared on her lips and inevitably I wished she would have cried. I would have known what to do then but this painful smile ... just left me with an unbearable feeling of helplessness. This time, I couldn't make any promise to her to make her feel better.
I sighed. "We have to come to terms with Sasuke's death first before we can let him go."
Sakura nodded. "I know. For the past hours, I've tried to say farewell but I am now realizing that I'm not ready yet. That's why I want to support the others now and do my best to help the wounded. Let's go. They are all probably waiting for assistance."
Kakashi-sensei smiled at her.
And then he said something that hit me harder than any blow I had ever taken in my life:
"Naruto would be proud of you."