Off Autopilot

AN: To start, I am not caught up on what fics are out there for the Damerey shippers or the Reylo shippers. I anticipate there will be some similarities between my story and other people's stories, and this is purely coincidental. No disrespect or idea-stealing intended! I have just been thinking that though Poe and Rey don't meet in the film, it would be fun to explore how it would go down when they did. I have not gotten around to reading the novelization of the film, because Grown Up Responsibilities™ get in the way sometimes, so if there are irregularities, please forgive that. This is definitely a long-haul story. If you're into the prequel era stuff, I've got another fic going right now, which I fully intend to tie to this bad boy here. They can be read alone or together though. Cheers!

Chapter One

His hand was warm in hers. Warm, but unmoving. She had squeezed it, hoping to feel some kind of reflex. For hours she'd sat like that. Stoically, Rey sat her vigil by Finn's side. When the sun had set, either from exhaustion or from sorrow, Rey finally shed a few tears, her forehead pressed to Finn's shoulder.

Others had been in the medical ward the whole evening. Fighter pilots had their wounds tended to. Chewie had been in to monitor his healing. Save for the doctors tending to Finn, everyone stayed well enough away from Rey. She was a relative unknown entity amongst the Resistance. Within hours, rumors about her had sprung up like wildfire amidst their celebrating. No one quite got the full story. Bits were correct, here and there, but for the most part, no one but Rey and Finn knew what had happened in that forest. Rey had hoped that most of the fighters would be too high off their enormous battle victory that she wouldn't be asked any questions.

Rey didn't know how, but she suspected that General Organa knew something of what had happened there. She was, after all, connected to her in some way. Through the Force, Rey assumed. And still, the Force was such a big thing, with such strong implications, that she found herself pushing it to the back of her mind, and focusing on Finn, ignoring the sideways glances and the whispers of Resistance fighters. They meant well—they were only curious. But still, it made the pit in her stomach grow.

Jolted from her thoughts, she heard a voice behind her.

"He's going to be fine." It was a woman speaking.

Rey sat up quickly, and tried to brush her tears away inconspicuously. She turned to face the tall woman with short brown hair. Her face was kind, and told Rey that she believed she was right.

"But he's…" Rey looked back at Finn. Unconscious. Heavily medicated.

"Yes, he will be out for a time, but we are a bit limited without a bacta tank."

Bacta tanks could speed healing exponentially, but were heavy. Not exactly easy equipment to transport from base to base, as the Resistance had need to do.

"Can he be brought to one?" Rey sounded hopeful.

"We will see how he does. When he wakes up, we may be able to, but I won't sign off on him being moved any time soon." The woman smiled. She admired the girl's devotion to her friend. "You should rest. Fatigue is one of a Resistance fighter's worst enemies."

Fighter. Rey had not thought of herself as such ever in her life. She felt more like a survivor. She had to be one, as a scavenger. She had fought Kylo Ren, sure, and others before, but did this mean she was a part of the Resistance now? She shook the thought from her mind.

"I want to be here when he wakes up," she could practically hear the exhaustion in her voice, if she was completely honest with herself.

"He won't be up before you, if that's what your concern is. If he does wake up before dawn, I will personally tell you first. But you need to eat. And sleep. There are empty cots in one of the far hangars. Go. He'll be fine in my care."

Reluctantly, Rey stood. She let go of Finn's hand, and leaned down to kiss Finn's forehead. Unbeknownst to her, from across the med wing, the Resistance's best pilot watched her with intense curiosity.

Rey sat alone at a small table, eating the food that had been prepared for the droves of Resistance fighters. Mechanics, pilots, technicians—everyone had a purpose in the Resistance. If you had no special skills of which to speak, you still pulled your weight in some way. Pushing a broom, carrying spare parts. So, sitting there with food in front of her, she felt that she hadn't earned the right to be there. She felt like an interloper.

Still, hot food was hot food. Eagerly she settled into her meal. It couldn't have been the best food in the world by the standards of many, but to Rey, it was. Compared to the rations on Jakku, which provided only the basic nutrients a human body needs to function, the modest stew and bread was heaven. Taking a break from her food, Rey reached for the steaming cup of black liquid that the cook had given to her with her meal. Bringing it to her nose she inhaled its aroma, unsure of whether or not she'd like it. Dark, earthy. She'd never had anything like this on Jakku.

Pushing aside her apprehension, Rey took a slow sip, taking stock of what she thought of the drink.

"I wouldn't drink that this late if I were you," a voice came from beside her. When she turned, she saw a moderately tall man with shaggy brown hair staring at her, standing only a few feet away.

Rey looked back at the cup.

"Caf," he said. "Coffee. It will keep you up half the night. The cook makes it with every meal, for those of us who pull nightly duties. So if you're hoping to sleep, I wouldn't go in for it."

Rey considered this, setting the cup down after she decided she had no desire to stay awake any longer than she had to.

"Thanks," she said simply. She cleared her throat, and took to staring at her stew, which she stirred mindlessly with her spoon.

"I'm Poe," the pilot said, still clad in his orange flight suit. He sat down next to Rey, uninvited. Rey looked up, surprised. This was the Poe Dameron that Finn had helped.

"Poe Dameron? The X-wing fighter? But you were lost in the sinking fields on Jakku. Finn said you were gone," Rey's eyes bore into Poe's in confusion.

"Yeah, I got thrown from the TIE fighter. Woke up in the dark. Managed to get back to the base though."

Rey was silent. She had no idea what to say to this man.

"Thank you," Poe said, his voice full of sincerity. "For sticking with BB-8. For helping get him to the Resistance."

"Oh, it… anyone would have done it."

"No," Poe added with a chuckle. "They wouldn't have. But you and Finn, who had no obligation to help. You did anyway."

Rey thought of what she'd done. How she'd surprised herself the past few days. Everything seemed to have clicked into place, like she knew she was doing the right thing. Like she was meant to help. But still, she felt that she had not done enough. Finn was wounded. And Han Solo. She failed him too.

Rey again felt eyes on her. She noticed that pilots and mechanics, all eating their food in their tight clusters at separate tables, had bowed their heads intermittently in quiet discussion. When she turned to them, they reverted to their friendly banter. With a sigh, Rey returned to eating her stew. Noticing this, Poe paused for a moment, and stood without a word.

Coming back with a bowl of his own stew, Poe sat down in front of Rey, which spurred more hushed talk.

"I don't think anyone here likes me very much," Rey rested her hand on her cheek, which she felt grow hot.

"They just don't know what to think of you, is all."

"I'm sure that's not all," Rey said.

"Well what they think doesn't matter. You helped us destroy Starkiller Base. We couldn't have done it without you, Finn and… General Solo."

"General…" Rey mulled over this word. "I keep forgetting that he was a part of the Rebellion. He's got… he had more of a reputation on Jakku as the galaxy's best smuggler." She felt a pull at her heart as she thought of Han, the gruff but caring scoundrel.

She sighed. "That's why they're looking at me like that," she said, suddenly realizing that they probably had such high respect for Han. They probably blamed her for his death.

Poe stopped eating. "They're a rough bunch. We all respected the General. But I don't think they really blame you."

"They'd be wrong to," Rey felt her voice raise an octave. "I'm not the one who ran a lightsaber through him. It was that monster." Rey stood abruptly, no longer able to finish the food in front of her, and marched towards the hangar with the sleeping cots. She couldn't bring back Han. She couldn't fix Finn. But she could maybe sleep, and at least forget it all for a few hours.

The cot that Rey had settled on was in a far corner of the hangar, away from any other occupied cots. She had slipped off her boots, but was still clad in her sandy and grimy clothes. She didn't care. The hangar was dark enough that she could sleep, but light enough that she could make out those around her. Turning to face a wall, Rey closed her eyes and listened to the distant sounds of the Resistance base. Voices and the sound of machinery. In a strange way, it calmed her and she was able to doze for a few much-needed hours.

In her dreams that night she saw the ocean. The island that Kylo Ren had taunted her with. The image that came to her so often in her sleep was a cherished thought, almost like a memory. She'd felt violated by the intrusion. She dreamed too about Luke's lightsaber. The fight in the forest. She had felt something flowing through her. It had ignited a feeling in her that hadn't gone away. That feeling had been growing since she had been interrogated by Kylo.

And she heard the voices again. Two of them, at the very least. Its energy surrounds us… and binds us. Someone was calling her name. Rey… Someone's hand was on her shoulder, gently shaking her.

… these are your first steps.

Her eyes were open now. She jolted up, ready to fight. She felt the cold sheen of sweat on the back of her neck as she looked up at the woman with the short brown hair. Finn's doctor.

"Is Finn alright?" Rey was standing now, holding onto the doctor's arm looking for comfort.

"Yes, yes," she said, her voice still hushed, not wanting to wake those around them. "He's awake. He wants to see you."

Without waiting for instruction, Rey raced off toward the med wing, not even noticing that she hadn't bothered to put her shoes back on.

Finn was laid completely prone, on his stomach, on the hospital bed. Monitors around him showed his vitals. A nurse was busy applying what looked like a poultice to his opened, but cauterized, wound.

When Finn saw Rey in the entrance of the wing, he tried pushing himself up, but the strong-armed nurse pushed him back down. "Stay where you are," he had said gruffly.

Rey rushed to his side and knelt so her face was level with his. She pressed her forehead to his, and intermittently kissed his forehead and the back of his hand.

"How do you feel?"

He groaned, his eyes glassy from the medication they were giving him. "Hurts, but I can't say that I care too much right now."

Rey looked at the poultice. It was being applied the full length of his back. He would bear an ugly scar the rest of his life. "What is that?"

"Bacta," the nurse said, shaking his head. "It's not a tank, but it's the best we can do. Doctor Kalonia says that this will cut down healing time significantly. He'll still be bedridden for at least a week. Doctor Kalonia will explain all this…"

Just as the nurse finished up, Doctor Kalonia put her hand on Rey's shoulder. "Finn, now that Dermot has applied your bacta poultice, you should start healing enough that you can sit upright in a week. I have every confidence that we can get you back to your fit state, but I'll need you to get plenty of rest."

"Whatever it takes," Rey said, speaking for Finn. He was going to rest and recover, if she had anything to say about it.

"I'll come back in an hour to check on you. Rey, General Organa would like to speak with you."

Rey looked at Finn, searching his eyes for permission. He nodded. She hated to leave him so soon after he had woken up, but for risk of overstaying her welcome, Rey wished to keep at least the General happy with her. "I'll be back, ok? Don't go anywhere without me."

"Wouldn't dream of it," Finn added in his sardonic and medicated tone. Rey squeezed his hand, and followed Doctor Kalonia out.