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ஜ Chapter 15: Auf Wiedersehen ஜ
-Shizuo´s point of view-
"He was... not easy to get along with, that´s for sure."
…
It was Shinra who was speaking the words, his voice shaking despite him trying to sound as usual.
Bright.
The sun was shining, not a cloud in sight. Birds were chirping, usually annoying the hell out of Shizuo and yet now he just couldn´t find the energy to get mad at anything.
Speechless.
It was what Shizuo felt like.
He couldn't put this feeling into words. He just couldn't.
He didn't know what he was supposed to do, he didn't know what he was supposed to say, heck he didn't even know what he was supposed to feel.
Empty.
That was all he felt.
And a picture of that stupid smirking flea in his mind.
A flea... that he had hated, that had always ran away from him.
That teased him, drove him mad. He hadn't trusted Shizuo, not even in that horrifying room.
A flea… that he had made up with.
He that promised he was going to get chased by him again.
A flea…. That was now resting in a black coffin.
Roses red and white had been put on top of that damned black box. As if trying to hide what was going on with their beauty. It was just so sick.
Shinra was standing there in black clothes, the laboratory coat having been ditched.
Trying to soothe him, Celty was next to him, hugging him close all the while as he continued his speech.
"Not everyone liked him, to put it nicely," his voice was creaking. Tears were glittering in his eyes even though none dared to drip down his cheek yet.
"And he was an asshole most of the time to be honest." A chuckle, so bitter it made Shizuo cringe, left the brunette´s lips.
"It´s odd to put it into words because there just isn´t much to say, there is no way to explain or describe how our friendship even worked. "
Friendship… huh…?
Somehow Shizuo´s throat felt constricted at the words.
"But still, he was my friend. I would go as far as to say that he was the best friend I ever had..." It was all he managed to say before his voice just faded out into a sob.
And no more words left his lips after that.
Izaya's secretary went up, saying some more words, but Shizuo didn't even pay attention to them. He couldn´t care less about the people surrounding him. Some people he knew, some people he had never seen.
His sight was fixated on but one thing…
The coffin in front of him.
Black, and smooth. The sun was reflecting on it, making it seem more beautiful than the occasion would suggest. As if someone had suddenly blown out a candle the blond shivered when the light stopped touching the surface of the coffin.
Slowly, but steadily it got lowered into a deep dark hole.
And Shizuo couldn´t help but think-
Izaya was in there.
Shovel after shovel the coffin disappeared beneath dirt and Shizuo couldn´t help but feel an urge to jump down there, and get the flea out-
Because...
Because-
He was actually there.
Izaya.
Just a few steps away and yet… he had never felt so far.
Slowly but surely people started to leave. Izaya's siblings went first. Namie was dragging then away together with some guy he didn't know.
Simon was touching his shoulder saying something to him, but he didn't pay attention. Somehow everything was a blur.
Shinra was last to leave the scene. He didn´t say anything to Shizuo. Just a glance was thrown in his direction, speaking so much more than any words could before he walked away.
Only few knew what actually happened.
That woman had been crazy. So crazy… she blamed Izaya for something he didn't even do nor cause.
They investigated her. Shinra found out about her. Apparently she was the child of some guy in a gang. The gang got scattered and her dad just left the family without a word. People came looking for the man and ended up murdering her mum in front of her eyes.
... it was a cruel scene to imagine and yet- Izaya has had nothing to do with it for once.
And Shizuo...
Shizuo had been on autopilot ever since they took Izaya away,
He just couldn't believe it.
He could still see it.
He still felt that stupid fur in his hands, the light body of the flea when he was still breathing. And the warmth he emitted before he grew cold.
He was there.
In his arms.
Izaya was in his arms.
And then... he just stopped.
Breathing.
And all of a sudden Shizuo himself felt as if he were choking.
Staring at the grave.
He was the only one left.
Earth had been piled on top of the beautiful roses, closing the pit.
And now there was nothing but that gravestone.
Orihara Izaya.
And it was as if suddenly he had realized he would never see anything different again.
His knees giving out he let himself kneel on the ground. Dirt was clinging to his pants but he didn't even notice- tightening his hands into a fist he felt something akin to the usual rage overcome his senses-
Gritting his teeth he rose his fist, aiming at the stupid stone in front of him-
And yet-
He just let it slump down into the dirt.
Destroying the grave... it wouldn´t bring Izaya back.
Destroying it... wouldn´t lessen the pain he felt... wouldn´t make his memories go away.
This feeling of regret.
He hated Izaya, he always had. He threatened to kill him.
Shizu-chan~
He seriously despised him.
You… weren´t supposed to die like that.
So why?
Why did it have to hurt so much to know that the flea was gone!
That he wouldn´t see him again that he wouldn't chase him anymore? Just why was his heart clenching so painfully and his throat constricting at the mere thought and memories of the past days he had spent with the raven?
Why did he have to remember how he had held Izaya when he was cold. Why did he have to feel like he wanted to protect the flea at that time-
And why...
Just why, why did he have to die?
Why…
The flea was here. He was so near and yet.
With a soft thud the blond´s head leaned onto the cold stone.
There he was the flea.
Finally gone from his life, never causing him trouble again...
He had never felt this devastated before...
-Two weeks later. Shinra´s point of view.-
"I don´t get how this works!" Shinra groaned, finally deciding to leave his laboratory for a while as he got up from his desk.
(Are you okay?) Celty was standing next to him sooner than he realized, holding out her PDA. The man sighed, rubbing his forehead, glancing over to the computer and the logo glowing on it.
Okay, huh?
He wondered. Letting his sight trail back to all the cables and brain tissues Namie-san had brought over he wondered why he was even doing this.
Did he really want to know how this "game" worked? Sure, the scientific aspect of it was fascinating- but when he thought about how Izaya had to die for this...
It had a bitter taste to it.
"I´m fine," he mumbled, answering Celty´s question with a sigh.
Someone had to analyze this after all so something like this wouldn´t happen again...
"Kishitani-san, I can finish this on my own as well," the mentioned secretary threw in, still sitting on the desk. The two had been working on this, figuring that both their knowledge together would be able to understand this kind of work.
The brunette shook his head, sitting down again.
A sudden knock, however, made him raise his head once more, looking towards the entrance.
"Ah-" He had pretty much expected anyone, just not the person that was standing in his doorframe smoking on a cigarette.
"Shizuo..." the blond had stopped, looking into the room and at all the stuff laying around on the desk and floor. It looked pretty messy in here with all these technical instruments.
"... you... are still analyzing this game, right?" the blond mumbled rather slow, but still stepping inside the apartment.
Shinra got up from his desk once more, it had been ages since Shizuo came to his place, he had been fairly worried considering he used to turn up almost every day because of injuries.
"Yeah. But I could use a break anyway, so-" quickly he shuffled over to the blond, but the blond quickly rose his hand though.
"No, no, don´t let me interrupt you. I´m just here because Kadota said he got whatever cable thing you needed," he voice, reaching for his pants pocket to pull out a weird shaped cable.
"Ah, we were waiting for this, thank you Heiwajima-san," Namie said, spotting the thing and stalked over on her high heels, clacking along the floor.
Shinra watched her, putting it into one of the computers while changing another one as she cursed because there were no plugs left. Eyes trailing back to Shizuo a worried frown appeared on his face.
"It´s been a while since I saw you, beat up some assholes again?" he asked, knowing full well from Celty that he did in fact beat not a single person up since Izaya died.
Not even one.
"Nah. They don´t annoy me as much anymore," Shizuo shrugged, watching the secretary as she started unplugging some other devices in order to get a free spot.
... somehow Shinra didn´t know how to approach the blond.
He was so calm, not angry anymore, it felt as though someone had used some sort of tranquilizer on the blond.
It broke his heart to see his old friend like this.
"This is strange. There seems to be some leftover data- Was there a saving option or was it modified?" the woman suddenly spoke having finally managed to plug the damn thing in again.
"What?" Shinra blinked, turning around.
"The game, it seems it has been changed," Namie repeated, pointing at the screen while the bespectacled moved over.
Shizuo craned his neck to see what the woman was staring at, but there were just some weird numbers and letters that didn´t make sense on the screen.
"I thought we got the guy?" Shinra mumbled a frown appearing on his face as he tapped along some keys of the keyboard.
"Data?" Shizuo voiced aloud, making the woman look over.
"Yeah of the game, somehow it seems to be different. Only the first level though. It´s an online game so maybe someone hacked it."
A frown appeared on the blond´s face.
Hacked, huh? Somehow that thought annoyed him more than anything else in the past two weeks. Standing up from the couch he moved over, grabbing something that looked like some sort of helmet.
"With this I can go into it right? I will see what´s up," he stated, already putting the thing on his head. Whoever fucking changed anything there he was going to bust into pieces.
"Ah Shizuo... you don´t have to," Shinra said quickly, not liking the idea of Shizuo going into this game once more at all. He already had no clue anymore what was going on with his friend, if he went in there, who knows what kind of effect it would have on him?
"Only Izaya and I know what it looked like before, if there were changes made then I will see." Shizuo made clear, his voice having a tune to it that made Shinra realize there was no point in trying to convince him otherwise anymore.
"… I don´t think that´s a good idea." Namie frowned, not getting at all what this was even about and just quirked an eyebrow at the doctor.
"Why not? I removed the monsters and whatever. He will just check out the landscape."
"But-" The words died on his tongue as he decided to stop speaking. No he couldn´t say it.
What was he even supposed to tell Shizuo? No don´t go in there? It might remind you of Izaya? He couldn´t do that.
Walking over to the computer he started up the program.
"I will give you thirty minutes." And so he switched a switch.
The blond flinched slightly when a headache assaulted him- The darkness that overcame him then was all too familiar.
His ears rang and he felt as though he couldn´t feel anything at all anymore, and then it was suddenly over.
...
He could feel something, a gush of air, brushing along his cheeks. Opening his eyes he faced not the nightly stars he had awaited, no, this time it was actually just a clear blue sky. The sun burning down from above with no cloud in sight.
Turning his head softly he felt the familiar weird fabric on his skin which were the clothes they had been wearing when they first entered the game.
A sad smile crossed his expression when he remembered Izaya´s face when they came here. ... the flea thought he was going to go onto a rampage. That he wouldn´t do as the creep said and let them die on purpose.
...
Pushing himself up from the ground he looked around. He could see some of the weird rabbit creatures running around. The ones that were supposed to do them harm. Now they just seemed like decorations, jumping around without a care.
... everything...
Everything was just like it was back then.
It was just like when he entered it with Izaya.
Actually quite beautiful.
Without this threat...
Flowers were growing everywhere. The grass moving softly in the wind and the tree´s leafes creating a soothing rustling sound.
... it was unfair.
The blond felt a lump in his throat as he looked around.
Shinra said something had to be different, right? The problem was, the only thing that really was different was that the flea wasn´t there anymore.
The only thing missing was Izaya´s annoying rambling- his insults, his plans, his "Shizu-chan"s-
Wearily walking through the meadow he glanced around, somehow, for some reason he was almost expecting the raven to pop up somewhere.
Wave at him and say something like, "hey it was a joke, of course I´m not dead~"
When he had come here with the flea he hadn´t had enough time to actually look at their surroundings, but now like this without the monster-
How could something so beautiful be abused for something so bad?
He still remembered the way Izaya had looked at him when that monster almost got him. It hit him once and for a second Shizuo had really thought it was going to get him.
That it was going to...
...
Kill him.
... that idiot.
Being all scared because he didn´t want to die. Looking at him that way. And then-
Before he knew it his fist had implanted itself into one of the trees around him. It shook, pieces of wood and leafes thumbled down, falling to the ground only to disappear once the touched the grass.
If just, if that woman had shot him instead, he would have fucking survived it!
Shizuo was a god damn monster, of course he would have survived it! He survived so many people trying to beat him up or kill him, hell even shoot him-
So why-
Once twice, his fist imbedded itself into that tree, shaking, knocking it over until it finally broke I half.
The blond was heaving, frowning, seeming as though he was going to punch yet another tree.
Only one question tuck in his mind.
... why did it have to be Izaya...
"I thought I told you, you weren't supposed to die... you stupid flea..." he mumbled aloud, his voice sounding even more alone as it resounded in the disturbing silence.
The fist dropped down next to his body, unclenching, letting go of the rage that had filled his heart, only to be filed with sorrow instead.
Izaya... wasn´t supposed to die...
Not him.
Not like that-
Not at all...
He had seen the coffin, he had been at the burial...
It was over...
It was...
"Come back you stupid louse….", no matter how loud he said it, who he told it-
The flea wasn´t there to hear it anymore.
Because…
Izaya...
Izaya was…
"You want me back, Shizu-chan?"
What-
All of a sudden.
Time stood still.
A loud rushing nose filled the blond´s ear and he twisted his head.
An immediate fear of him now actually having gone mad filled his mind for a split second- until he saw him.
Him.
There.
Right in front, coming up from between two trees.
Wearing the same shit he was.
Looking at him with a frown that seemed so sad he felt it matched his own.
There was no way-
How-
"Izaya-"
... it...
It was him.
Right?
The raven hair, the crimson eyes, that smirk he tried to plaster on his lips, that voice-
That voice calling him Shizu-chan.
Too shocked to move the blond could only stand there, look at the raven who was but a few steps away from him.
"This is awkward, isn´t it? Meeting again like this, honestly speaking I didn´t think I would see you of all people again, but hey, I can´t complain," the Izaya in front of him suddenly started rambling, while Shizuo could do nothing but stare.
"How-" it was pretty much the only word he could think of at that moment.
Because-
He had to be dreaming right? Shinra messed something up and now he was asleep instead of being inside the game, right?
"Seems I somehow got saved online like a virus, a bug of the internet you could say," the raven continued, answering his question as if it was the most normal thing in the world- "It´s sort of lonely in here though, no one really drops by- and that thing was pretty damn scary, the boss I mean," Izaya paused, feeling just the slightest lump form in his throat as he looked at the blond in front of him.
He looked... surprised. Like he didn´t believe what he was seeing- Izaya couldn´t blame him, he wouldn't react any different to a situation like this.
And yet- feeling hot tears suddenly stain his cheeks, he was just so fucking glad.
Glad that someone came, that it was Shizu-chan who came.
He had been in here.
For two weeks, and nothing happened. For two weeks he had been running from that monster, he had been scared for dear life, always running, hiding, not knowing if he would ever get out of here, if he would ever get to see something else again apart from this landscape-
Not knowing if someone might delete this game-
A chuckle forced itself from his throat when he recalled the moments before he ... he died didn´t he?
"I found out how to defeat the boss you know. Remember the sugar in the bags? If you feed the bunnies they attack the beast for you," he laughed. There were things he wanted to know, things he wanted Shizuo to tell Shinra, he wanted to know if he could get out of here again somehow, if he rally died or maybe was just in some sort of coma. And yet somehow he couldn´t bring himself to.
"Honestly though, for a second I thought I might just lose this game and-" the air was forced out of his lungs. Not having expected the action Izaya was left to blink and cut his words midsentence as a pair of arms wrapped around him so tight he might as well die from being hugged too hard.
"You are real right? I´m not going insane, right?" the blond questioned, the grip on the raven tightening even more, and yet Izaya didn´t even feel the need to tell him to let go.
Feeling his own voice starting to crack he let his forehead rest against the blond´s shoulder.
"I can´t say you aren´t crazy for hugging your worst enemy", he chuckled, his own hands finding hold in the blond´s weird shirt. "I´m also not exactly real, since it seems only the electric waves from my brain were saved, so you can´t really say I´m really-"
"You are really Izaya alright, rambling way too much shit," Shizuo interrupted with a laugh so relieved, it left Izaya wondering just what had happened in the past two weeks.
Or rather... it only verified one suspicion he had had.
"I... died didn´t I." Swallowing hard the blond nodded into the raven´s shoulder.
"You fucking asshole you jumped into that bullet on purpose-" he said, the frown on his face only growing deeper.
"Ah, yeah that was stupid of me wasn't it," the raven sighed, yet- he couldn´t really bring himself to regret it.
Pushing the flea away just the slightest bit Shizuo looked at the raven´s face.
"Why did you do that?!" And yet the raven just shrugged.
"Monsters aren't supposed to die by simple bullets so-"
"She wouldn´t have gotten me!" She wouldn´t-
Shizuo was pretty damn sure he could have survived it. He survived so many injuries in his life and yet-
"She aimed for your head though." The blond blinked. Izaya had averted his gaze. "As much of a monster you are, a bullet to the head would kill even you..." A soft smile spread over the raven´s lips. "And you know, I couldn´t have that happen."
Shizuo understood.
He understood so well.
"You idiot-" Izaya felt the same. Just like Shizuo, he couldn´t just watch the other die. That... idiot-
"… did anyone come? To my funeral?" blinking the blond took in Izaya´s expression.
"If I had one that is," he continued speaking, fairly bitter, "maybe people just tossed me in the sea, hating me and all."
"They all came." Shizuo got the reason Izaya thought they all wished for this death, and yet-
"Really?"
"Yeah." No one wanted him to actually die- not even him, because-
"You sound so sure, did you come too?" the raven chuckled, wearing his trademark smirk as though everything was back to normal, ",and there I was pretty sure you would dance on my grave-"
No.
"Shut up, Izaya-" he didn´t even know what it was that made him execute such an action and yet there he was-
Cupping the flea´s face with both his hands-
He was kissing the raven.
It was weird, awkward, he didn´t even know what Izaya was thinking about it, but he just had to.
It was quick, just a peck on the lips, enough to cause the raven´s eyes to grow wide as saucers. And yet it couldn´t have felt any more right as he hugged the flea tightly once more, burying his nose in the creak of his neck.
"Shinra will get you out of here again." Perplexed the raven blinked, still rather flashed by what the blond did.
"Into my real body? I doubt that," he managed to chuckle, knowing that even Shinra wouldn´t be able to do that sort of thing.
"I´m sure that freak can do it together with that secretary of yours," Shizuo insisted. He had to. Shinra did all sorts of weird shit, so this shouldn´t be much of a problem either! If the weird guy that developed the game could do it, then Shinra could too.
Everything would end well.
"Kay, but-" feeling a soft pressure on his chest the blond let go of the raven how pushed him away.
"Yeah?"
"It´s been really damn boring in here, so, before you leave again-" the raven took a step back, sheepishly grinning at him. "Chase me~?"
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THE END C:
Awww my lovely readers, wipe those tears, Izaya is "alive" xD haha I bet you thought I would kill him off like in that other story I wrote C': But nope xD Actually this end was what I had in mind since the beginning C': now if anyone is gonna complain about how the kiss is OOC, meh fuck it x'DD I hated this story since like 5 chapters ago I didn´t know what else to put in here x'DD And hey, after all this time, I should at least give you a kiss, no? xD
Guest 2: haha See? I let izaya live after all xDD daw mairu and kururi will be so happy hearing that C': Actually i do feel a bit sorry for saya xD i planned on killing her since the beginning and yet somehow I feel bad for murdering her in the end after all x'DD Well I dunno what to say to this chapter, the kiss was probably the tip of OOCness in this story but meh xD I hope you still liked it C': and that the ending didn´t drive you mad xDDD
Melobski4: oioioioo calm down xDDD he is alive xDDDD -serves cookies-
Random reader: shhhh no screaming, you will interrupt the other readers! xD It´s oki izzy isn´t dead after all xDDD
Guest: le gasp- nope he is alive C: C: C: xDDDDDD
Well then, now that this story is over I will be starting a new one on February the 13th~! xD it will be called Shingeki no Shizuo- ohohohooh yes xD A Shingeki no kyojin crossover xDDD
Just one little spoiler ahead- Izaya will take Levi´s position and Shizuo, well C': You can guess I think xDDDDD The original characters from Shingeki no kyojin won´t be there, except for maybe some unimportant guys that I can kill off later lol xD
Everyone important will be replaced by the DRRR staff xD Shinra being the crazy doc he is I BET you know whose place he is gonna take xDDDD
Well then, I hope you liked this story xD Even though I turned to hate it x'D
And on a little side note, I made a tumblr account recently x'DD I have no idea what to do with it yet, but I will probably post my pictures there and spoiler the shit out of everyone C: Maybe add some parts from future chapters and tease ya all, but hey xD You know I´m a little shit already x'DDDD Also gonna make updates on how far I´m with the chapters, so-
If anyone wants to drop by, just search for ShirohimesShizayastories xD
Well then, bye bye~! See you my lovely cookies~! C: 3
PS.: READ "A matter of life and death" by the Snipster, on taptastic! *0*0*0*
THIS is the BEST yaoi comic I ever came across! AND she updates regularly! Usually two pages a week, sometimes even 3!
AND THE ART IS GORGEOUS
THE PLOT IS GORGEOUS
I LOVE IT
xDDDD
Go my dear readers, GO AND SPREAD YOUR LOVE! xD
PPS.: Auf Wiedersehen is german and could mean two things, either, (usually) Good bye, or quite literally speaking, See you again C: