A.N. I am so sorry for the long wait in this last update. It was a hard story to write and so many emotions go into it, especially this chapter, that I found it difficult to finish. But here is the final chapter, let me know what you think.
Part 3
Bella POV
Everyone was wrought with pain following Billy's death. Some more then others, but the pain was felt everywhere. The chief of the Quileute tribe had died, and there was not a single soul in La Push that didn't know about it.
By the following morning queue's had formed around the house, and for at least a mile back. It was manic. Jacob was inconsolable, and would not part with his fathers body. He had been draped across the bed since Billy passed. It was hard to watch.
Not long after he passed, the pack came back. They all filtered in one by one to pay their respects, as dad, Sue and I watched from the living room.
Sue decided to take control of the masses, once the pack had paid their respects. She gathered those closest to the house and explained that Jacob wasn't ready to let visitors in yet, and that Billy's body would be moved to the church early tomorrow for viewing.
Murmurs of discontent broke out and the pack stepped in. Anyone who wasn't directly connected was turned away. The elders came, and said prayers in their beautiful native language. I could only watch in awe.
"Are you OK?" my dad asked as he stood beside me.
"I am worried about Jake," I said, and he nodded his head in understanding, "he's only just turned seventeen, what is going to happen to him?"
"Billy will have something in place," Dad said confidently. I nodded in agreement, but his reassurance done nothing to ease my anxiety.
I waited until everyone had paid their respects before heading back into the room. Jacob was sitting back upright, still staring at Billy's body.
"They'll be here at nine tomorrow morning to take Billy to the church," I said. He didn't reply, but I didn't need him to. I made my way over to Billy and picked up his brush that sat on his night stand, I set myself beside him and brushed out his long hair. Before framing it around his face much the way he used to do.
"Is there anything special you want him to wear?" I asked. He shifted his glassy gaze to me, and my heart broke further.
"The suit he wore when he married mum is hanging up in the closet," he rasped, his voice croaky from disuse. I handed him a glass of water and retrieved the suit from the closet. I hung it on the door and smoothed out any wrinkles.
"Can I stay with you and Charlie?" he asked.
"Of course you can," I replied. He nodded in acknowledgement and stood from the chair, he bent over Billy and placed a soft kiss on his head.
"I love you, dad," he murmured, he stood back up and swiftly left the room, choking back the tears as he did so.
I breathed out a breath that I didn't know I was holding in and finally let the tears fall. I didn't want to cry in front of Jacob, because he needed me to be strong, I would cry when I was alone. I finished smoothing out the suit and combed his hair again. I was fiddling – putting off the final moment of goodbye. I would see him tomorrow, but I wouldn't get another privet moment like this one.
But I had stalled to much, I heard Jacob ask Charlie if they could go, he needed breathing space. So I turned to Billy's lifeless form and kissed his head.
"Goodbye Billy," I choked out. "I am sorry I didn't listen to you before. You showed me so much love, and kindness, and did so much for me, especially when I was younger, and I took it for granted," I tried to swallow my tears so that I could continue on, "I promise that things will change with Charlie, I won't go on treating him the same way that I have. Life is too short for that. I love you, Billy." I kissed him again and rushed out of the room. I took a moment to dry my tears and calm my breathing before following the rest outside.
I breathed in the fresh air and looked for my dad and Jacob, they stood off to the side talking with Sue. Jacob's eyes immediately found mine and he made his way over to me.
He made to hug me but I held up my hand to stop him, his eyes burned with pain and his eyebrow arched in question.
"It's my turn to comfort you, Jake," I said softly. He smiled ever so slightly, and pulled me into a tight hug. He dropped his head onto my shoulder, and sighed.
"You have been comforting me, Bella, I don't know what I would've done without you," he whispered in my ear. I smiled into his shoulder, and let my tears soak his t-shirt.
He pulled away after a few minutes, and let out a shaky breath. He wiped my tears and placed a kiss on my forehead, then grabbed my hand and entwined our fingers. I smiled at him briefly before heading over to my dad. He smiled at us, before hopping into his cruiser. Jake and I hopped into my truck, and we made our way home.
It was only eight pm, but neither of us had slept properly for more than forty-eight hours, so as soon as we got in, we had a small bite to eat, then headed to bed.
Jake and I bickered about me giving up my bed for him, but I won by stating that he was far too big to fit on the couch. He huffed but gave in. He sat on my bed as he watched me mill about my room. I set his sweats that he slept in on the bed, before grabbing my own pj's.
"Right that's me," I said grabbing my wash bag, "see you in the morning?" I said. He nodded his head, still keeping his eyes trained on me. I reached for the door handle but he stopped me.
"Bella?"he asked grabbing my hand.
"Yeah?" I turned to face him and was slightly surprised to see him a little nervous.
"Will you stay with me?" he asked. He looked so vulnerable in that moment that I couldn't do anything but agree. He needed me more now then ever before.
"Of course I will," I replied. "Just let me wash and change?" he nodded his head and I made my way to the bathroom.
Five minutes later I was back in my room, and I made myself comfortable in bed as Jake washed up in the bathroom. He came back in a few minutes later and climbed in beside me.
"Fair warning, you'll need to shower and change your sheets in the morning," he chuckled.
"Noted," I laughed.
I turned to my side to face him, and gently traced his frown lines. He lay watching me, his eyes showing slight amusement.
"Are you OK?" I asked.
"I will be, eventually," he replied sadly. I nodded my head. We lay in silence and I stroked his hair and watched him fall asleep. When I knew he was in a sound sleep, I reached over and gently kissed his head.
"I am so sorry Jacob," I said as I settled myself down to sleep. "I wish I could take away some of this pain for you," I sighed. I closed my eyes and sleep claimed me within minutes.
XXX
The funeral was one of the hardest things to endure, ever. It was emotional and a lot of people were hit with the realisation that they'd never see Billy again, it was daunting.
Jacob suffered the worst, not only was he burying his last surviving parent, whom he had a very strong bond with, but he had also to contend with his two bratty sisters. The will had been read the previous night, and the house had been left to Jacob, much to the dismay of his two sisters, who were left with, few, but sentimental possessions.
Jacob never let go of my hand the whole day, he clung tightly, even during the argument with his sisters. I was his only anchor left in the world, and he was drowning.
I gave a small speech, apologising for all the things I had done wrong, for not showing him how much I loved him, and for not heeding his warnings. I took him for granted, but I promised to make it up to him by being a better daughter to Charlie. The whole time Jacob stared at me with loving eyes.
After shaking many a patrons hand, we finally made our way home. Not wanting to part ways with us yet, Jacob followed us home. Sue had been granted full custody until he turned eighteen. My dad was a little miffed at the fact that he wasn't given custody of Jake, but no one could tell him the real reason. Jake needed to stay in La Push because of the pack, and he managed to please dad by insisting he'd much rather stay with us. So dad arranged it so that Jacob could legally stay with us until he felt up to moving back to La Push, and then spend the remainder of the time in Sue's.
I had drifted off into a day dream as we journeyed home, but was pulled from my musings when Jacob suddenly gripped my hand hard.
I looked up to question him, but was cut of by my dad. "Here's trouble," he muttered statistically. I looked up questioningly, but was soon answered as a gleaming silver Volvo came into view, and standing in front of it with a scowl plastered on his face was Edward.
My dad shut off the engine and turned to me. "Did you invite him here?" he barked.
"No I didn't," I snapped back, "I did say I would talk to him after, but I didn't mean straight away."
Dad nodded once and exited the car first. Jake reluctantly let go of my hand and got out, I slid out after, stumbling a bit, Jake steadied me then linked his hand with mine once again. Edward's scowl deepened.
We walked up to the door and I stopped, Jake looked at me, pained.
"Sorry," I said, immediately feeling guilty. 'Why don't you go in with dad, and order the pizza?" I said. He nodded.
"Any particular one?" he asked.
"You choose, I chose last time," I replied. He nodded again and followed my dad inside, but seconds later he was back out.
"Forgot my bag," he said. I smiled in reply and watched him as his lifted his stuff out of the car. Shutting the boot he locked it then went back inside. I finally turned to Edward.
"So he's living with you now?" His normally calm façade had dropped and his voice was laced with malice. I was immediately defensive.
"Yes, his last surviving parent has just died, he needs to be with family."
"He has a whole stinking pack he can live with," he sneered.
"He wants to stay with us, so he is. It's too painful for him to be in La Push right now." I snapped back. I was so angry at his lack of caring and sympathy, that my whole body shook. He quickly became alarmed at my reaction, so he changed his demeanour, and the subject, to try to pacify me.
"Well no matter my love, Alice thinks that she can get everything back on track and the wedding can go ahead as originally planned." he smiled sweetly, I blanched. Was he serious?
"Are you serious?" I asked. He mistook the meaning of my question, and became rather excited.
"Yes, she has been secretly continuing on in planning the wedding, in the hopes that you wouldn't be gone too long."
"I told you the wedding was off," I snapped.
"I know, my love, but you were understandably upset and-" I cut him off, becoming angrier by the second.
"I didn't call the wedding off because I was upset. It was because I noticed a huge, gaping difference between us. You have spent so long being a vampire that you no longer possess the human emotions that come with someone dying!
"You attribute Billy dying to a loss that Jacob and my dad are baring, and despite me constantly telling you how much I loved Billy, and what he meant to me, you still haven't asked me how I am feeling about loosing my second father!
"I didn't come here just for them, I came here to fix the broken relationship between myself and Billy, that I had created, before I lost him forever. I lost Billy too, and I am not going to be planning no damn wedding hours after we buried him!"
I was breathing heavily at the end of my little speech, and I could feel the burning heat radiating off my face.
"I am so sorry, my love, I didn't know you felt that way," he whimpered his apology, hurt by my angry outburst.
"Because you don't listen to me," I sighed I felt completely deflated, and moments from breaking down as the emotions of the last few days bared it's weight in my heart. I could sense Jacob's presence, I looked up to see him standing at my bedroom window watching our whole fight. I had to regain my emotions, he needed me to be the strong one, I couldn't crumble.
"I am sorry my love," he apologised again. I nodded in acknowledgement. "The wedding will be put off until your earliest convenience," he tried.
"No. I meant what I said before, the wedding is off indefinitely. I am needed here, Jacob and my dad both need me, and I intend to fix my broken relationships with both of them, before I head off to college."
"As you wish, my love," his voice cracked with emotion, and I almost changed my mind. "I will wait for you, for however long you need."
"Edward, I no longer wish to become a vampire, seeing Billy die, long before we ever thought he would, has taught me the fragility of life, and I am no longer willing to throw that away." My emotions finally got the better of me, and the tears swept freely down my face.
"That doesn't matter to me," he said tenderly, he went to wipe away my tears but I avoided his touch. I couldn't succumb to my need to be with him, I had to be strong, it no longer felt right.
"It does to me. Edward, I will always love you in some way, but, we aren't compatible in life. Not any more. Vampires are meant to be with other vampires, not weak, fragile humans. I have no place in your world."
"Bella, you can't do this, you're the one I am supposed to be with." His voice broke with emotion, telling of the tears that he couldn't shed.
"But I am no longer willing to give up my human life for you, and if I can't do that then we won't work." My own tears increased causing my breath to come out in short, sharp bursts.
"So that's it then?" he asked with slight anger in his voice. I nodded, too upset to speak. "So you choose this, you choose him?"
"No. I choose life." I replied with some anger in my voice. After everything he still needed to blame Jacob, even when the fault lay with us.
I had no more to say, so instead I turned and walked back into my house. He stopped me at the door with his final words.
"I will always wait for you," he said. I didn't reply. I didn't know what I could say that I hadn't already said. So, I closed the door, knowing in my heart that that was the last chapter in that part of my life. I had barely made it in two steps when Jacob scooped me up in a bug hug.
"You got to stop doing that. I am supposed to be comforting you," I said he sighed and set me down.
"You're grieving too, you're allowed to be upset," he said in a somewhat stern voice.
"But you lost your father, I just lost my—"
"Second father?" he answered for me. I hung my head in shame. "I am fully aware that other people are grieving for my dad."
"But, I don't deserve comfort, not after the way I treated you both," I snapped.
"Bella, all of that was forgiven the moment you dropped everything to be by his side. You were there when he needed you the most, that's all that matters, so stop punishing yourself and allow yourself to grieve," his tone was angry, so I pulled him into a hug.
"I'm sorry, Jake," I whimpered into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me tightly, and stroked my hair as I finally gave into the grief.
"It's OK, the pain never goes away, but it gets easier to live with, and there's no reason we can't comfort each other as we learn to cope."
"I don't deserve you Jacob," I sighed.
"Everyone deserves a best friend. You and Charlie are the only stable things left in my life, and I am not going anywhere."
"I wouldn't let you even if you tried." We both laughed then fell into a comfortable silence.
We stood hugging each other for a while as we both grieved for our loss. I never knew loosing someone so prominent in my life would be so hard. But, I had my dad, and Jacob, and I would forge a better relationship with my mum, and in time, we would all learn to be OK again.
The end.