Hey Ladies and Gentlefolk, I'm back once again with another chapter.
So, like I've said before, I'm mostly done with Homestuck, and I doubt I'll actually read through the epilogues, as I just can't bring myself to care anymore. As far as I'm concerned, it's a happy ending, period full stop.
Regardless, I'm going to finish this story, and it's going to be a long haul yet. Though, the updates will be slow and random. Perhaps once a month or so, but don't quote me on it.
Anyway, happy late 4/13, and I hope you enjoy the chapter. We've got Chester and Jade back for the first time in forever, we've also got Chris, and Dave and Evan and Rose. And some cunning Dersites up to no good.
As always, I own nothing save the ever expanding list of OCs, the Winniebago, and a spaceship.
Please review, and I appreciate all your support and love. I sincerely hope you all enjoy.
XXXXX
Upon a desolate chequered Battlefield, nestled in the ruins of some devastated citadel, two young figures sat awkwardly on a chunk of debris.
Christopher Baxter; battered, bruised and cut, yet healed enough by his time in "the other place" to move without too much pain, sat beside a shell-shocked John.
He wished he knew what to say to his new friend to make him feel better, but, well. John had just died. Just like that. He seemed to be taking it better than Chester, or even himself, but John still clearly needed a few minutes to come to terms with, well. Everything.
Leaning against his silly fluorescent war-hammer, John stood, muttering "well, i guess rose needs me on dave's planet now..."
Chris quickly stood as well, sharp pangs in his still very much broken arm making him cough suddenly. Through his wheezing, he managed to get out something resembling emotional support.
"Don'tworryJohn, imean, everythingsgonna beokaynow, right? RoseandChester aresmart, they'llfigure it allout."
John nodded slowly, giving him a weak smile.
"yeah, i just wish there was more i could do to help, you know. it doesn't sit right that the other guys and girls are doing more than i am."
Chris agreed, shrugging, "I'vefound thatit justgoesbetter whenI listentoChester andEvan. Backwhen weplayed WarslammerSimulator, they'd throwmodels at my avatar ifIdidn't followorders."
After slowly deducing that Chris was probably joking, John hesitantly laughed. A quiet calm settled on the pair, with neither feeling as particularly worn down. Chester would have perhaps made some comparison to laughter and medicine and all that, but Chris is not that imaginative.
Eventually, John sighed and turned to face the sky. "i should probably head out."
The boy in the knightly armour nodded, "Iuh... probablyshouldget goingtoo. Youknow,lotsof deliveryhero stufftodo andallthat,right. .Uhuh."
With that, the two kids blasted into the sky in differing directions. The fight wasn't lost yet. Not if they could do anything about it, at least...
XXXXX
Upon a Land of Heat and Clockwork, a trenchcoated figure clad in a gas-mask tore through the sky, his objective finally in sight.
Falling from the heavens like an atomic bomb, ready to smite some Japanese communists of the face of god's good earth, and in a way that was almost under control, Evan hit the ground.
After the truly impressive plume of dust and pulverized rock cleared, Evan cursed in exasperation. He was knee-deep in the ground. What a bother.
Finally, he pulled himself out of yet another mess, took a few strides to Dave's red quest bed, emblazoned with a symbol of a gear, and laid his... friend's body down respectfully. Evan then took several paces back, and settled down to wait, idly toying with his sword.
He wasn't forced to wait long.
Soon enough, yet longer than he would have liked, Dave's body began to ever so slowly rise into the air, as a subtle red glow filled the air. Evan mildly grunted when his movements began to slow, and his breathing stiffened.
XXXXX
Meanwhile, upon a Violet moon, within a palatial bed chamber, a sleeping blonde figure that still wore shades began to glow.
Elsewhere, Rose Lalonde was interrupted in her attempts to dislodge the great mooring pins of the other moon by a sudden glow. Casting her gaze to Dave's moon, and seeing an all too familiar glow, Rose shivered.
What was happening out there?
XXXXX
Fortunately, the odd time breaking stuff quickly finished as Dave reached the apex of his climb, and began to glow a blinding red. Evan still couldn't look past the connection to communism that entailed.
In the instant the glow faded a now familiar ghostly voice sent a sentence through his mind, and through the mind of every living creature upon the planet.
"ARISE, KNIGHT OF TIME"
Knight of Time? Evan thought, why couldn't he have gotten a title that cool? Although, Prince of Rage was pretty badass as well. Still, being a knight was probably better. Though, did that mean Dave was going to get a horse and some armor? He'd better. War movies always drew his ire when knights weren't shown as the cool and deadly horsemen they were supposed to be.
His musings were cut short by Dave, now clad in... less awful looking red pyjamas, complete with a knightly tabard and hood, rising from the slab with slow, shaky, movements.
Evan kept a respectful distance, but was keeping an eye on Dave to intercept him if he fell over suddenly or something.
"So, I see you got off your lazy arse. Are you ready to get some work done and kick in some faces?" Evan greeted enthusiastically.
Dave glanced up at him, expression blank beneath his cool-kid's shades. He waited for a long moment, before shrugging, and replying with a hoarse voice.
"darn right i am. let's get all return of the space warrior monks up in here. that dog won't know what hit him when we go in for round two, doom star boogaloo. there'll be surprise confessions of paternity, laser swords, and one of us pushing him down a bottomless pit. and man eating teddy bears, cant forget those lovable little abominations."
Once again, Evan saw fit to simply stand in silence, before muttering, "I still don't know what you're talking about..."
Dave shrugged theatrically, though perhaps a little too enthusiastically. Like a smile that was just too wide. Or a suspected communist agent that proclaimed his innocence a little too much.
"i don't even know anymore man. My word smithin's just not up to par right now. please forward all complaints to the republic of dave complaints office, telephone ladies are standing by now."
Evan was quiet for a little longer, before grunting, "Whatever. It's... good to see you around again."
Dave gave an almost authentic smile. "it's whatever good to be around again. lets try to not get turned into chew toys again, okay."
Evan nodded, hate filling his veins at the recollection of that damn fight.
Dave continued, paler than usual. (In Evan's opinion all his pasty unathletic friends should go outside more often. Humans weren't meant to be as pale as paper or snow.)
"so, do you know what happened between the here and now. You know, can you give me the all inclusive spoilers version of what happened while you were having a "weekend at dave's" with my body"
"It hasn't been a weekend yet." Evan retorted, "...I think. Time is stupid here. But still, it was like an hour, maybe less."
Dave mimed wiping sweat from his brow, and actually said "Phew", "for a second i was worried i woke up in the future or something, and you were evan's grandson or something."
Evan tried not to feel uncomfortable at the thought of kids and girls, and all that... "It's been an hour." He snapped, trying to change the subject.
"Look, that bastard Jack killed everybody, then as of now everybody's back. Got it?"
Dave sighed in visible relief. "so everyone's okay?"
Evan nodded, his tone softer. "Yeah. Everyone's okay."
Dave kicked a pebble, hands in his pockets (much to Evan's jealousy. Why didn't his crappy Pjs have pockets. That's why he had to put his regular clothes on.)
"so, what's the plan now?" the coolkid muttered at the sky.
In that instant, both their computers buzzed.
XXXXX
Upon a Violet moon, having pilfered a PDA from a particularly bored communications officer, Rose Lalonde lounged in the shadow of a great chain, co-coordinating the efforts of her fellow players in the session. The soft glow of the slate grey device filled the small cubbyhole she was nestled in as she typed.
-tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering EnragedExtremist [EE]-
TT: Greetings, Mr. ...Evan?
TT: Hold on...
EE: Who the hell are you supposed to be?
-turntechGodhead [tG]- Has Joined the Chat
tG: oh, hey rose
tG: how's it hangin
tG: over here it's hanging like a monkey with no arms from a tree with no branches
tG: so, not well
TT: Dave. To the point as ever.
tG: i like to think i take the scenic route
EE: What are you people even talking about. What route?
EE: Also, I guess you're that Rose broad Chris mentioned.
EE: Just so we're clear, I've got my eye on you. You... something.
tG: yeah rose, evan's like, not about to fall for your feminine wiles or something
EE: I don't think she can make me fall over. She's a girl for crying out loud.
tG: ahh, i'm sure there's a women's suffrage joke to be made here, but im just blanking on it
TT: Yes. Thank you for your meaningful contribution to the discussion Dave.
TT: Regardless. We three have work to do.
EE: Stop talking about it then, let's go. Let's get er done.
TT: The task requires further explanation than that, I fear.
EE: I doubt it.
tG: i know you can't see it, but he's motioning to me to double check if you're really you.
tG: you know, cuz alien bodysnatching communists or something
EE: I am doing no such thing.
tG: he just kicked me while muttering "stop it"
tG: this is the greatest conversation in my life
EE: Whatever. What do you want.
EE: "Rose".
tG: he actually muttered your name out loud while growling
tG: i couldn't make this up if i tried
tG: i actually feel kinda inadequate that i can't make this up
TT: Are you both fully appraised of the situation as it currently stands?
EE: No.
tG: i was dead for a while, so much like the dear Mr. Scott of everyone's favourite paper distributor, "NO! GOD! NO GOD PLEASE NO! NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOO~"
TT: I see.
TT: In any case, defeating Jack remains our ultimate goal.
TT: To accomplish this there are two primary targets.
TT: First, someone must reset reality within the session by preforming an event known as "The Scratch". This does not concern you, it is taken care of.
TT: Secondly, we need take an explosive object known as "The Tumor" deep into the ephemeral gloom of the furthest ring, seek out the Green Sun, and destroy it using "The Tumor".
TT: In the process, the Sovereign Slayer will lose both his source of power, and his life, in short order.
EE: That sounds... workable.
tG: yeah, all in all it's not too shabby
tG: unlike these shitty jammies
tG: this is seriously wall-mart level quality right here
tG: what's next, a homeless man urinating in the toys aisle
tG: stoners making a toilet paper fort
tG: actually nevermind, that sounds awesome
EE: So what do you want from us?
TT: Your directness is actually rather refreshing.
TT: So, brass tacks, as it were.
TT: I need the two of you big strong boys to do some heavy lifting.
tG: * laughs in irony *
tG: * realizes rose isn't being ironic *
tG: * laughs harder *
EE: Lifting? Lifting what?
TT: It's a figure of speech, tailored to your... Victorian ideas of gender norms.
TT: Anyway. I need the two of you to come to Derse, specifically to the base of my moon's docking shackle clamps, to help me free it.
TT: From there, we will standby to await Chris's delivery of "The Tumor", then we four will deliver it into the furthest ring, using the severed moon as a delivery vehicle.
EE: That... actually makes sense.
EE: I don't really want to say this, but I'm up for this.
tG: yeah, we'll be there, don't worry a hair on your dark witch's head rose.
TT: God tiers can travel through the midnight of space without issue, so your trip should be without hazard or delay.
EE: Yeah.
EE: I'll be there.
-EnragedExtremist [EE]- Has Left the Chat-
TT: So, Dave.
TT: Would you terribly mind if I inquired as-to your condition.
TT: I couldn't help but notice the god tier transformation go off in your tower.
tG: look, i appreciate your attempt, but im doing good enough right now
tG: lets keep our eyes on the ball
tG: or else we'll fall off
tG: and then coach Wilbur will look at us in that way that just screams "what's even wrong with you, you disappointment"
tG: and then the whole class will laugh
tG: and then we'll go home, and eat peanut butter sandwiches, and be sad
tG: so lets not go there, okay
TT: I have noticed, though made a point of not acknowledging, the way that you retreat deeper into your deflection tactics when you are distressed, Dave.
TT: It's certainly okay to talk about it.
tG: how about yourself, ms. "clinical like a clinic", you always get more detached and objective when you're messed up
tG: things are shit, but we don't have time to talk about our feelings or any of that
TT: Look, I'm sorry. Is that what you want to hear?
tG: rose, we'll talk later, okay
tG: look at me, being the biggest man here with this olive branch
TT: To be fair, I do believe this Evan character is taller than you.
tG: Okay, you know what, that was below the belt.
tG time out
tG: time out right now, the referee's blowing his referee blowing thing
TT: I do happen to believe that the locals call it a... "Whistle".
TT: The pronunciation is a tad bit byzantine and arcane, bear with me please.
tG: you're not english you know, you're a yank just like me
tG: stop with this sassy "im more cultured than you" stuff
tG: you have as much english culture as Bane Johns, super-spy extraordinaire,
tG: which is to say none, by the way
TT: I do believe you meant to say British, but go ahead and continue to try and defeat me.
TT: Your failures only make me more powerful.
XXXXX
Meanwhile, upon a Land of Frost and Frogs, within the parlour of a damaged white spire, rising from the slush and trees like a sword thrust into the earth, two kids awkwardly stared at the floor.
Chester was distinctly uncomfortable about a great deal of things.
Not that he would actually admit it of course. That was just right out. Trying to avoid eye-contact with Jade, who was energetically attempting to do the same, Chester focused on the one thing he actually could focus on without feeling further awkwardness.
In his hands, stuffed unceremoniously into whatever was on hand at the moment, specifically a hollow majjyk 8-ball of all things, was a shimmering baby frog. Tadpole. Thanks, super-brain.
Chester wasn't a biologist by trade. He supposed that not knowing the infant stage of some stupid smelly reptile didn't reflect too badly on his intelligence.
Anyway, this was apparently supposed to be Billious Slick, the great majjyk frog thing that would be used to breed a new universe. It had taken a frustratingly long time of mucking around with the frog equipment to finally turn the genetic slurry into a living creature, but it was finally done.
And all they had to show for it was this stupid little creature the size of an eraser, swimming contentedly in it's crappy fish-tank. This was not the first time Chester wanted a refund from SBURB.
On a whim, he shook the ball a bit, watching the vivid colours in the tadpole's unnatural skin shift and change. With the bulk of his attention distracting itself in the repetitive action of swirling the water inside the ball around, a more traitorous part of him tried to drift towards subjects he definitely did not want to think about.
Shivering, he tried to redirect his attention elsewhere. Before his brain caught up to his actions, he'd stood, catalogued the swirling ball of colours, and initiated conversation with his equally awkward partner.
"Uh. Is there anything else we can do to help?" He shyly choked out, becoming aware of just how loud his voice seemed in the quiet of the dim room halfway through, leading to all sorts of embarrassing vocal contortions towards the end as his brain tried to decide if it was more awful to stop in the middle of a sentence, or see it through to it's terrible conclusion.
Mercifully, Jade pretended that nothing strange happened, and replied with a flicker of the enthusiasm she'd had before... before a bunch of stuff that shall not be dwelt upon happened.
"you know what?" She said, standing as well, smoothing her colourful eyesore of a skirt, "just because we're done with frog stuff doesn't mean that we can't do anything else to help. rose is counting on us, you know"
His embarrassment momentarily forgotten, Chester replied, pondering over the dilemma of what there even was for them to do now, "What else is there to do that needs doing?"
Jade paused for a moment, lost in thought.
"i know!" She answered with a flash of motivated energy.
"we should upgrade our gear! it wasn't very helpful when... ah... you know happened."
Towards the end, her glimmer of cheer faded, as her thoughts visibly turned back to that muddy field.
Chester too felt a pang of... something when she made him think of that damn disaster again, but he definitely could agree that his god-tier costume and weapons were pretty useless in that fight. Spending some time getting improvements made was certainly a good idea.
"That sounds like an intelligent idea." He agreed.
Eyes steely behind her glasses, Jade nodded sternly. "come on, we've got work to do."
XXXXX
After an unpleasant and awkwardly silent trudge through mud and slush, Chester finally followed Jade into the gloomy depths of the detached and mangled laboratory ball, still sitting at the base of the tower, mangled trees showing the path of it's fall.
Inside, the two set to work.
At first, the air seemed rather tense to Chester, or so his rather ineffective means of social observation suggested. But, as the two sank into their work, and began to slowly collaborated, a pleasant silence began to settle over the lab, occasionally broken by productive mutterings.
Trying to upgrade his (potentially) bullet-proof jacket's damage resistance, Chester felt like he'd finally hit a breakthrough. Or, rather, his super-brain did it for him.
Still, the gel layer it was giving him schematics for, well. If he was interpreting the raw data correctly, and he was, the kinetic resistance of this gel was frankly insane. As he drew his modus, fumbling with whatever inane questions the Pop-Quiz modus threw at him this time, he was already putting together plans on how to actually alchemize the compound.
A few feet away, behind the controls of the Punch Designix, Jade Harley was working on building a better gun. Specifically, she was fusing the Green Sun Streetsweeper with one of Chester's extra Plasma Guns. There was some other stuff thrown into the mix as well, but as far as she was concerned, the result would be an energy weapon with a ridiculous damage output.
A little bit more work rewarded her with a flash of light, and the deposition of something very warm into her hands.
Looking her creation over, Jade noted that it closely resembled the Streetsweeper, except that it was recoloured to black, and what seemed to be a miniature sun was contained within a glass ball in the weapon's middle, flickering and spinning serenely.
She smirked. This was just what she needed.
"Hey, Harley. Look at this." Chester suddenly called over, grabbing her attention,
She quickly popped over, leaning over his shoulder to see what he was working on.
"what's that?" she asked, glancing at the captchalogue card he was staring at like it held the secrets of the universe. Although, knowing SBURB, that was a possibility.
"As far as I can tell." He began, "It's for a type of armour supplementing gel. That minimizes kinetic impacts."
She knew he wouldn't have called her over for something that simple, so she elbowed him slightly, "aaaaannnndd?" Jade prompted, clicking her tongue
Chester shook the thing again like he was strangling it, then stuffed a scribble covered yellowed notepad into her arms. "See for yourself. The numbers on this thing are ridiculous. This shouldn't be possible."
Jade glanced over the formulas and hasty calculations, recognizing most of them at a glance, but the numbers involved... "a suit of this stuff could brush off tank rounds... assuming they didn't penetrate. what on earth is this stuff? you said gel of some sort? let me see!"
She rather aggressively forced herself between Chester and the table, snatching the card out of his hands, and stared over it, muttering.
"Well. My stupid Mage powers gave me the formulas and blueprints for the stuff, really. As for what it is. I'm not sure. It seems to incorporate at least three elements that science has no names for." Chester replied, backing away from her as she continued to mutter.
Seemingly satisfied, she handed it back to him, commenting. "yeah, that seems like the real deal. if you can get everybody an outfit incorporating that, we'll be set for life."
Chester nodded, "My thoughts exactly."
Wandering over to the Alchemiter, and inserting the card, Chester added, "Although it is still quite vulnerable to penetration damage. We'd need some kind of armour plates to cover that weakness. And ideally get the best of both worlds."
Leaning against the workbench, legs swinging idly, Jade suggested, "aluminum? or maybe titanium?"
Chester shrugged, typing away at the console, "It might work. Although the power to weight ratios are rather rubbish. Enough to wear comfortably is almost worthless against anything stronger than a low calibre rifle."
Jade kept brainstorming ideas, but it was only when Chester started producing packets of the gel, which was rather thick and soupy and blue, while commenting on the wonder of Alchemy, being able to produce almost any amount of any compound for a fixed grist price, that the idea hit her.
"carbon!" She shouted, lost in the grip of an exciting problem to solve.
Chester paused for a moment, before exclaiming, equally excited, "Carbon nanotubes! You're a genius! Scientists back home are limited by production cost. But we can produce entire armour plates of layered nanotubes for cheap!"
Seemingly realizing that he was actually talking out loud, his shoulders hunched inwards, and Chester shrank back to work.
Jade frowned, her good mood disappearing, but made no comment.
They worked for a while longer like that, the silence only broken when Chester commented on her new gun, and she informed him that it was apparently called the Sunset Typewriter, much like the old mafia drum guns of the thirties.
Chester appreciated the historical reference, at least, before making a snide remark about Americans and gun crime that earned him a sharp elbow.
It was at that moment, that a knocking sound at the gash in the wall caught their attention. Standing there, rapping an armoured fist against the wall was a small child clad in knightly plate.
Seeing Chester, the intruder exclaimed, "HICHESTER!", before leaping across the room to smother his hissing and protesting friend in a hug.
Jade couldn't help but giggle.
XXXXX
Elsewhere upon a Land of Frost and Frogs, a pair of Dersite agents buzzed low across the tree canopy in a custom built swoop ship.
The Courtyard Droll was giddy with excitement, he was actually doing a super cool secret agent mission, just like the dashing Rugged Performer. He wasn't quite sure what their target had done to make the Dignitary and Jack mad, and he was even less sure about how he was actually going to "eliminate" them, but the Dignitary had said that all that would be up to his pilot, the very sullen and quiet Concealed Murderer.
Said Mr. Murderer was currently eyeing the data screen in the alcove between them, tapping out a series of arcane commands who's purpose was beyond the Droll.
A white dot lit up on the screen, the arrow pointing at a location very far away from them. With something approaching a change of facial expression, the cowled pilot moved the craft on a slight turn that sent the Droll back into the cheap fabric seat.
A soft whine accompanied the craft's energy boosters putting out more power, as the ship accelerated towards it's unsuspecting target.