Monday morning, Alex has to wake me. I tell him that I slept through my alarm. I didn't. I cut it off twice – I don't want to fucking go today.

Everyone has to have heard of my dad by now. That he's in the hospital. I don't know how many people will think that I spent the holidays there with him. It's gonna tear at me if I have to say that I was. I don't want to lie but… they won't understand.

I bury myself further under the covers as Alex calls my name again. He's made breakfast for me and though the bacon and eggs smell amazing, I don't want to get up. If I leave the couch, I have to go to school. Why can't I skip the first day?

Most of my friends saw me at Dale's party on New Year's Eve. They already know that Dad's done his worst to me again. But everyone else… this is the first time they'll see the damage. I don't think I used to care this much about what other people thought. But I don't want them to see me like this. I don't know what they'll think of the bruises.

"Dash, come on," Alex calls again.

I wish this day hadn't come. All weekend, I hoped that a blizzard would come through our town. That we'd be buried for weeks and I wouldn't have to go to school until the bruises faded.

But wishes are for kids.

The scent of coffee is strong in the air when Alex makes himself a cup. That's the only thing that drags me up from the couch.

I shuffle into the kitchen and Alex looks up from his coffee. He nods toward the table where a cup is already waiting by my plate.

"Thanks," I mumble, crossing over to the table instead. He's placed the sugar and creamer by my plate so I busy myself with that.

He crosses over to the table and sits down across from me. Neither one of us talk as he makes his own cup of coffee and that silence weighs heavily on me. I don't know how to do this. Neither of my parents were ever around on my first day back at school. I don't think I needed someone to be until now.

"I can come by around lunch if you want me to," Alex says. He shrugs when I look up at him. "We'll go out for a burger or something."

I don't know that it'll help. I have the feeling that if I let him take me away from school, I won't go back after. I wish I didn't need him dropping me off and picking me up. But my car's still in the shop and he wouldn't let me drive even if it wasn't.

"That's okay. I don't know what my schedule's gonna be so… I should probably stay at school until I figure it out." I drop my gaze to my coffee, picking it up from the table. I take in several mouthfuls before I look up at Alex again. "Are you working today?"

He shakes his head. "No, Kendra and I have to figure out some of this stuff with the house. We have a meeting with the real estate agent at nine so… we'll know a little more after that."

I swallow more coffee. "When are you guys supposed to hear about the offer you made?"

"Hopefully tomorrow," he lets out a breath. "That's the last day, so if we don't hear anything then… we can assume they passed on our offer."

I didn't know house hunting could be this stressful or that so much could be up in the air. I can see the tension it's put on Alex, in the way he carries himself lately. I wish I could do more.

"And you're sure there's nothing I can do to help?"

He shakes his head again. "No, it's a waiting game right now." He lifts his own coffee mug and makes a face. "You know Anastasia drinks hers black now?"

"Gross," I respond, setting my mug down. My stomach's still twisted up in knots but I at least eat a piece of bacon. I don't want all of Alex's cooking to go to waste.

We settle into eating and I wish I wasn't so damn nervous again. But I've gotten too used to slow mornings with nowhere to go and nothing to do. Being around Alex and his family has smoothed the rough edges I came to them with, but… I think I need them back today. If I'm rough around the edges again, no one will try to touch me.

The doorbell rings when I've gotten down all that my stomach can handle today. I still think I might puke if I'm not careful. But I down mouthfuls of scalding coffee to settle my nerves.

Alex leaves the table, silently moving to the foyer and I focus on stilling the tremor in my hands. It doesn't help. I'm starting to think nothing ever will.

"Dash?" Alex calls as he comes back to the table. "Someone's here for you."

I look up when he steps aside. Danny's standing just behind him, smiling when he sees me. "Hey," his voice is soft on the one word but it sets my heart racing all the same.

"Hey," I say, but I can barely drag enough oxygen in for anything else. He smiles anyway, crossing the distance between us.

I ache for him to pull me into a kiss but he doesn't. He smooths my hair down instead, sinking into the chair next to me.

"You ready to go?" he asks, looking down at the rest of me with a faint smile. "Nice pj's."

My face flushes and I scoff. "I didn't know you were coming. I would have gotten dressed first."

He grins, shaking his head. "I'm glad you didn't. These are cute. He tugs at the sleeve of my Baby, It's Cold Outside pajamas Tatiana gifted me for Christmas. "And it really is cold out. You should dress warm, okay?"

His concern makes my face flush but I nod anyway.

"Do you want some coffee to take with you?" Alex asks, looking between the two of us.

Danny glances my way before he shrugs. "I was planning to take you to Starbucks as soon as we leave here. Either way's good with me though."

I like the coffee Alex makes. But I never pass up an opportunity for overpriced coffee.

"Starbucks is fine," I mumble, pushing my plate away. I catch the frown on Alex's face at how little I've eaten. "I'll get dressed and I'm ready to go."

I'm the farthest thing from ready and I think Danny can tell. I wonder if it's because he knows me as well as he does. Or if it's merely written on my skin for everyone to see.

"Kendra's awake, but she's still in bed," Alex says, lifting his mug from the table when I stand. "You can go to the bathroom to get dressed though. She won't mind."

I nod before I reluctantly leave. I gather my clothes from the living room where I laid them out last night and leave for the bedroom.

Alex is talking with Danny but I don't catch what he's saying, his voice too soft. I have the urge to stand in the hallway and eavesdrop on their conversation. Like I did with Alex and Anastasia the morning after that car almost fell on me. God, that seems so long ago.

I'm not that person anymore. And even though curiosity picks at me, I don't wait around. I go into the bedroom instead.

Kendra's sitting up in bed, her computer on her lap. She looks up when I step into the room and offers a smile. "Hey. How you feeling?"

I think if a truck ran over me right now, I'd welcome it. I'd relive that day I spent in the hospital before Christmas over this.

"Peachy," I say, blowing out a breath. "Fine, I guess."

She gives me a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry. It'll get easier. But hey – if you want me to fake an emergency, I can come down there and get you out of class. At least for a little while."

The sincerity in her tone makes me snort. Not only would Alex discourage it, I'd rely on it too much if she did.

"I'll be okay," I respond, shrugging. "It's just one day, right?"

She nods and we both ignore the fact that it's more than a day. It's every day until these bruises heal. And every day after that until everyone forgets about them. Or about the things they've heard about my dad on the news.

I go into the bathroom then and numbly pull my clothes off. Despite Danny showing up, and the promise of Starbucks, I still imagine locking myself in the bathroom and never coming out again. I could get my GED instead. I don't think it really matters if I'm any good in school – the colleges that want me are only interested if I can throw a ball.

It's cold as I get dressed. My fingers shake and I can't tell if it's shivers or the trembling again. Either way, I brush my teeth and leave the bathroom.

Kendra gives me a small wave as I leave. My stomach's twisted around itself like I might vomit but I don't. I take in deep breaths to try and calm the feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't know how everyone expects me to do this without shattering into a million pieces. I'm already cracking in a hundred different places.

Danny turns to look at me when I come down the hall. "Hey," he says, getting up from his chair. "Ready to go?"

I nod, moving to foyer. He and Alex follow me, the three of us silent as I put my shoes and jacket on. I've just picked up my backpack when

"Hang on a second." He steps past me – leaning forward to snag something from the coat rack. He moves in front of me again, holding a scarf. "Here, I don't want you to get cold."

"I'll be fine," I try but he loops the scarf around my neck anyway. "Are you seriously going to make me wear this?"

He rolls his eyes. "You sound like Ana – please just wear it. For me?"

"You sound like your mom," I mumble and he laughs. I sigh and tuck the scarf closer around my neck. "Fine. If it means that much to you…"

Danny senses the hesitation in both of us. "I'll wait outside for you, okay?" He touches me on the arm before he leaves the foyer and slips outside.

I watch him go and when the door closes behind him, Alex puts his hands on my shoulder. He's smiling when I look back at him.

"You got this, okay?" He whispers the words, but it still makes my throat tighten. "If you need me at any point during the day, call me. Or text me, that's fine too. I'll show up, okay?"

I swallow hard past the lump in my throat. "Okay."

He pulls me into a hug. "I'm proud of you. Remember that."

It's hard to some days. All the shame I've felt my whole life pounds into me sometimes. And it never breaks or lets up. It doesn't leave much room for his or anyone else's pride. And most of the time, my heart can't take their pride anyway. It's hard to tell if I even deserve it.

"I'm here if you need me," he says again. His hold on me is strong. And for a moment, I let myself give in to it.

I lean forward, resting my chin on his shoulder. I let out a breath that's been trapped in my lungs for longer than it should have been. But this is hard. I don't know how to do this and I sure as hell don't know how to do it right.

Alex doesn't say anything more. Just holds me tighter. And somehow, that's better than all the words in this messed up universe we're living in.

Danny's sitting on the steps outside the apartment when I leave it. He looks up from his phone and smiles. "You good?"

I don't think he's asking if I'm good to leave. It's a general good. And I can only give a shrug in response.

"Come on, you promised me Starbucks." I hold my hand out to him to help up from the stairs.

He takes my hand with a grin. "Hey – I'll deliver. If I say I'm gonna do something, I always come through. Ask anyone."

I let him lead me down the stairs and I only let go of his hand when we reach his car. He seems reluctant to let me go. I don't want to lose his touch either. But we part and I get in the passenger seat of his Equus.

I buckle my own seatbelt as he backs out of the parking lot. His brow is furrowed as he drives and I think I fall in love with the concentration in his features. He's so fucking beautiful in every way. It's not just that he's cute or hot – of course he is. It's all the little things about him too. The way he sinks his teeth into his bottom lip or the slight quirk of his brow as he merges in traffic. God, he's fucking beautiful.

"Just a regular coffee for you?" he asks, pulling into the parking lot of Starbucks. He turns to look at me with the question, catching whatever expression is on my face. "Something wrong?"

I think I blush. It's hard to tell between the heat in his car and this fucking fire I feel for him. "No, I'm fine," I breathe out, nodding to the building. "You want to go in or go through the drive-thru?"

He chews on his lip, turning back to look at the café. "I don't know. Maybe we should go in cause you're kind of particular about how you like your coffee. So… are you good to go in?"

I think my heart jumps with the look he gives me. He knows me so much better than he did before. And every day that I see him – every day that we do shit like this, he'll get to know me more. It's terrifying and so fucking exhilarating at the same time.

"Yeah, that's fine," I say past the feelings lodged in my throat.

There's only a few people in front of us, and when we order our coffee, we step out of line. My drink comes up first and together, we move to the condiment station. He waits with me while I make my coffee. Even opens a few of the sugar packets for me. I think he's doing it to make me smile. It works.

"Thank you for this," I say when I've poured the last sugar packet into my coffee.

He leans against the side of the counter, swiping a coffee stirrer. "For what?"

I catch him chewing on the stirrer and I'm pretty fucking ashamed of how much I like watching him. His tongue swirls around the stirrer, sliding it in place for his teeth to chew on again and again and agai- fuck.

"F-For all of this," I stammer out, feeling the blush heat my face. "Picking me up today, the coffee…"

He shrugs, touching me on the arm. "I didn't want you doing this all alone." He pauses there and a smile brightens his expression. "Plus, I wanted to see you before school. So… it's a little selfish of me."

I don't care how selfish he wants to be. He can always have as much of me as he wants.

"Th-That's okay," I stammer, letting out a breath. "I want to be selfish with you too."

Danny grins and I lean forward to kiss him. But the barista calls his name so I pull back.

He turns to get his drink and the flash of disappointment across his face sends a rush through me. I don't know if I'll ever get used to this. He wants to kiss me. He's disappointed that he's not currently kissing me. Fuck me, what'd I ever do to deserve him?

I let him take my hand as we leave. His fingers fit perfectly between mine. It's strange to think that I ever thought someone else's did instead.

Danny doesn't let go of me until we reach his car. And even then, he goes to the passenger side first and opens the door for me. He's too fucking much, I swear.

When we're both settled in his car again, he turns the radio on. Pop music flows from the speakers and he nods along to it. Despite the coffee and the decent company, the tension starts building in my gut again. I wasn't built to withstand storms like this. I don't have the strength in my bones.

Danny slows down the closer we get to school but it doesn't matter. We still have to go there. And even though I'm still nauseated as fuck and genuinely might puke, I force myself to speak.

"Do you know your class schedule yet?"

My voice is soft and I think he picks up on it. He turns toward me, but he keeps his eyes on the road. "Yeah, I do. My dad got it for me last week." He nudges the heat dial a little higher. "Why? Do you have yours?"

"No. I figure… it gives me an easy excuse to slip away from everyone," I say. It's probably a stupid reason to wait to the last minute. But it's the only one I could come up with. I'm not worried about what my friends are gonna say. I know they care. I'm just terrified of cracking underneath all their stares and questions.

Danny nods. "Okay. Do you want me to go with you? To the admin office?"

I think I'd shatter if he didn't. "If you don't mind…"

"I'm cool with that." He pauses, turning to me with a grin. "Besides – this way, we can check our schedules. I'm hoping we have a free period together again."

Damn, I forgot about that. New semester… we might not get the same break together anymore. I don't know that I took enough of an advantage of that break last semester. Then again… a lot of fucking shit happened last semester.

"I hope we do too," I say, turning my gaze out the window.

He doesn't say anything as he pulls into the school parking lot. He turns the radio down a little lower as he eases into a parking space near the edge of the lot. I can see my friends hanging around Jeff's truck. They're all bundled up in winter coats and scarves and-

I choke. From the cold or the sight of my friends or the weight of Alex's scarf around my throat. I don't know what, but… something reaches out and chokes me.

Danny keeps quiet but I know he can tell. I know he sees me spiraling. But he just unbuckles his seat-belt and leans back in his seat.

I'm trying to breathe again and he's sipping from his coffee. I don't want to be here. I can do this shit online. I don't have to walk through those doors and face whatever the fuck is waiting for me.

"You know most of them have already seen you, right?" Danny says softly. He waits a second before continuing. "At the New Year's Eve party? They've seen the bruises already."

That's not it. I wish this was just about the bruises. Or fuck, maybe I wish it was my friends that I'm worried about. But I've got a whole building full of people that have heard about my dad. They'll all see my face and wonder what happened. And I won't have an answer for them cause I fucking choke just thinking about it.

"I'm gonna walk in with you," he says, keeping his voice soft on every word. "I won't leave you to do this all on your own."

Fuck, he should be able to. I should have the strength to walk through the fucking doors on my own. It's just my friends. And a thousand other people inside those walls. Fuck me.

"I don't want to do this," I confess, my voice shaky. It's the truth. I'd rather be anywhere than here.

Danny lets out a breath, shifting in his seat. "I know."

I think he already knows the racing thoughts running circles in my head but I need to say them anyway. To get them out of my head and off my chest. To speak and have someone actually listen.

"I don't want to memorize a new class schedule or sit through another math lesson. I don't want to play basketball this year. I don't… want to do any of this," I'm rambling on now but he doesn't stop me. Just keeps his gaze fixed out the windshield, waiting for me to finish.

Danny sips from his coffee again, nodding to everything I've said. I feel like I have more in me. Like more than this day is scratching at me. But I'm out of words to speak and I'm too fucking shaky to keep going anyway. I don't know how I'm supposed to do this. I don't know how anyone expects me to do this. I'm barely keeping it together and we're in the fucking parking lot.

"It'll get easier," Danny says softly, still not looking at me. "You'll get through today and the first week and then the month will be gone and… it'll get easier. I promise."

He speaks like he's had to tell himself that before. And I can picture him coming back in his junior year after everything went down with Blake and Paulina. It fucks me up to know that two years ago, Danny was going through hell and I didn't even know. He got through his shit in one piece and I've only ever shattered.

"I'm sorry," I whisper and I don't even know what I'm saying it for. It's too late for my shitty apologies to cure him now. The shit he went through broke him, but he's put himself back together. He doesn't need my apologies now.

Danny frowns, turning to look at me. "What are you sorry for?"

For the hell he's been through. For keeping him out in the parking lot while I try to sort through the panic racing through my head. I'm sorry for everything. For nothing. I don't fucking know anymore. I'm just sorry.

I swallow hard but don't say anything. I turn away from him, staring at where my friends are still gathered. I search my soul for the strength that should still be there. I've always gotten through everything on my own. I've never had anyone to lean on before and maybe that's the problem. I've gotten used to having someone near me. And I really fucking shouldn't be. This is my problem.

"You can… stay with them or whatever you want, okay? I can get my schedule on my own," I say, reaching for the door handle.

He stops me before I can pull it. "What are you talking about? I want to go with you."

I don't want him to. Fuck, I do. I want him by my side, ready to hold my hand and breathe calm back into me. But I shouldn't need him this way. It's not his responsibility to hold me softly or put me back together. He's just a boy. He doesn't deserve all my shit.

"You've got your own stuff to do," I try to argue but he won't hear it.

He tightens his hold on me when I reach for the door again. "No, I don't. Stop, okay? I want to be here with you. Even if we miss the first two periods because you need to stay in the car until then. I don't care. I just want to be with you."

God, he's too fucking selfless for his own good. I'm bound to take advantage of him the more he does shit like this. He shouldn't offer me up this much of himself. I've never done anything to deserve his kindness.

"Danny-"

"I don't want to hear it," he interrupts me with. "Whatever you need, I'm here for you."

He's got his own shit to do today. He doesn't need me trailing after him like some kind of shadow. I can do this on my own. I have before.

"You want to go get your class schedule before we go to your friends?" he asks. "I can park closer to the admin side of the building so we can slip inside."

I'm gonna feel pathetic either way. It makes no difference if I face my friends now or later. I'm still fucking weak.

"I don't care." I go for honesty but Danny doesn't take it that way. He calls my name softly, asking for the truth. But that's the only truth I have to give. I've spent my whole life building walls and putting on masks so no one knows if something's fucking with me. I don't know how to confess that this is tearing at me when I've always worked so hard to make myself numb to it.

Danny slides his hand down from my arm, interlacing our fingers together. "I'll take us closer to the admin entry, okay?"

"No." I let out a breath, turning to him with a shrug. "I'm gonna see them anyway. Might as well get it over with."

He nods but it's with a frown. I don't know if he wanted to move his car or not. I'm tired of trying to figure everything out.

I get out of the car and he's quick to follow me. I take my coffee with me and set it on the hood of his Equus while I shrug my backpack on. Danny does the same and then we're walking up to the front doors of Casper High.

My gut is twisting like I'm gonna vomit but I don't break my stride. My friends are only a few hundred yards in front of me now. I can get through this without breaking. I always have before.

"Wait." Danny catches me by the arm and stops me from walking. The sudden movement causes coffee to splash up out of my cup. "Sorry, I just… can you hang on a second?"

I'm still buzzing and vibrating with the electricity thrumming through my veins, but Danny pulls me behind a Ford truck. He blocks the two of us from view long enough to pull me into a kiss.

His mouth molds to mine and some of that tension coiled in my gut melts away. His mouth is warm and when his tongue presses against my lips, I let him in. He's holding on to me, dragging me closer to him with every passing second.

When we finally part, he's out of breath. The space between us disappears almost instantly when I press my lips to his again. Maybe I did this by myself every other semester but… Danny's here now.

"I don't know… if you want them to know about this," he whispers when we part again. He's still breathless and it leaks into his tone.

I don't know what I want anymore. My friends won't care that I'm with him. I can think of a couple that'll tell us it's about fucking time. I don't want to hide him away like I'm ashamed of him. I'm not. But… maybe I want to be selfish and keep this thing to myself for a little while longer.

"Dale and Mitch already know," I confess, ducking down to press a quick kiss to his lips again. "Jeff and Kwan too."

Danny groans softly at the kisses I'm pressing to his jaw now. "O-Okay so… wh-what then? You want to tell the others?"

I shake my head, kissing his neck now too. "No. I just want to get through today with you. Is that… okay?"

He sighs but from the shakiness in the breath, I know it's from what I'm doing to him. "Y-Yeah, that's fine. Just… ah, cut it out."

I grin when he squirms away from me. He scoffs, shoving me gently by the shoulder. "Go, okay? Let's do this."

He follows after me to where our friends are gathered. The nerves are still flooding my veins but I don't feel as controlled by them anymore. If Danny's with me, I think I can get through this.

Jeff notices us first. He's leaning back on the hood of his car, looking up at Dale, who's explaining something in great detail. But Jeff's gaze drifts and he sees us when we're a couple of feet away.

"Hey, losers!" he greets us, waving widely. "Showing up late with Starbucks, huh? Classy."

My gut clenches and for a second, my footsteps falter. I get the urge to turn around and run. But that would only get me out of today. And Danny would come find me wherever I run anyway.

"We're not late," I come back with, speaking past the tension in my chest. "Besides, you're just jealous."

Jeff rolls his eyes, collapsing back on his hood. "Whatever, man. The least you could have done was texted to see what I wanted."

"You could have stopped on your way here, too," Danny argues, grinning when Jeff lifts his head to look at him. "Don't blame us for not leaving early enough."

An engine revs behind me and I jerk my head around at the noise.

"Shit," I mumble, my heart pounding in my chest. Danny's hand brushes against mine and he offers up a small smile when I look at him. A quick glance around the group assures me that nobody else saw. Damn, what the hell is wrong with me?

I look over my shoulder again and find the source of the noise. Someone in a leather jacket is climbing off a motorcycle, parked a row away from my friends. They take their helmet off and when they shake their hair free, I realize who it is.

Nik gives me a wave as he stows his helmet on his motorcycle. He swings his backpack onto his shoulders and moves across the lot toward me.

"Yo," he greets, holding out his fist for a bump. He's wearing fingerless, black gloves that are cold to the touch when I press my knuckles to his.

"Nice ride," I say, nodding toward his bike.

His eyes light up, his grin widening. "Right? Dude, I fucking love it. I'm so glad I talked my dad into letting me get this instead of a car."

He lets out a breath, glancing over his shoulder at his bike before focusing on me again. "So how've you been?"

"Fine," I shrug, taking a pull from my coffee cup. "How about you?" I ask, feeling a couple of people staring our way but when I glance toward my friends, no one's looking at us. Danny's talking to Paulina and Star – I catch the smile in his tone, even though his back is to me.

Nik shrugs when I look back at him, running his hand through his hair. "Oh, you know… hanging in there. Hey, how's Alex? My dad was asking about him the other night."

"He's fine," I say, frowning when he does. "Why? Was he-"

I don't get a chance to finish my question before someone comes bounding across the parking lot, calling out for Nik.

Nik turns to look just before he's pounced on by a wiry guy. He lets out a quiet, 'oof' as the blonde guy jumps on his back.

"Hey, man," Nik says, laughing as he staggers under the other guy's weight.

The guy's hair flops in his eyes but he's quick to push it back. As soon as I catch the grin on his face, I recognize him.

"Hey, Derek," I say.

His grin widens. "Hey." He glances toward Danny with a nod. "Danny, yo." He flashes a peace sign toward Danny before looking at me again. "So what's up?"

"Just… final semester and all," I say, gesturing toward the school building.

Derek makes a face, adjusting his position on Nik's back. "I feel that. I still have to get my schedule from inside."

"Same," Nik says, just as Danny softly clears his throat. He's apparently no longer talking with the girls, and looking between me and Nik.

Heat floods my face. "Sorry, um… you know Derek. This is Nik," I say, gesturing toward him before I actually look at him. "Nik, this is Danny."

Nik offers up a grin, swaying as Derek wraps himself around Nik in a piggyback style hold.

"Hey, how you doing?" Nik asks, holding his hand out toward Danny. He offers up a handshake instead of a fist bump.

Danny smiles as he clasps his gloved hand, giving him a shake. "I'm doing great, thanks. Sorry, but you said you're Alex's…"

"Cousin," he says, almost losing his hold on Derek. He quickly pulls his hand back and grabs the back of Derek's thighs to hold him better. "Shit, man. Calm down." He looks back toward Danny with a grin. "Sorry, that's second cousin. But what does it really matter, you know?"

Danny laughs softly, and Nik nods toward the admin building. "Well, I've gotta grab my schedule. And apparently my parasite's coming along for the ride, so we'll see you guys later."

"Later," Derek says, grinning as Nik sets off for the building, successfully carrying him on his back.

I watch him go for a second or two before I turn back to Danny. He gives me a soft smile, his fingers brushing against mine.

Star calls Danny's name and he looks toward her. She beckons him closer and with a last glance at me, he moves across the parking lot toward her.

Kwan slides off the hood of his own car, parked next to Jeff's. He tries to be subtle about coming over to me, but I feel like everyone's watching him now.

"You doing okay?" he asks softly and I can only shrug.

I lift my coffee to my mouth and down scalding coffee until I can think again. Until I can breathe in without this cold air shattering me. "How's your mom doing?"

Kwan frowns. "Dash-"

"I don't want to talk, okay?" I basically whisper the words but I don't feel like it's enough. Even though only Jeff is looking at us and Danny's talking to the girls again. I still feel like they're all watching me.

He sighs heavily. "Okay."

I shouldn't be cracking at the seams from my best friend's concern. But… maybe that's who I am.

"I gotta get my class schedule anyway. I'll see you later, okay?"

Kwan nods, watching me carefully as I move away from him. Danny catches the movement and I hear him quietly tell Star that he can talk more about it over lunch. I don't know what they were talking about and I feel guilty for pulling him away in the middle of it. But I can't stand there until the bell rings. I'll splinter and break into a thousand pieces if I have to make conversation.

Danny follows me into the school and we squeeze past people gathered in the hallway. I get a few looks but I try not to make eye contact with any of the people we're passing. I try not to care that they're looking.

"When are you guys moving again?" Danny asks, looking down at his phone when I glance his way.

I move past a group of girls. "I don't know yet. Alex and Kendra are supposed to find out this week if their offer was accepted."

Danny nods. "Okay. My parents are going away soon – some kind of class reunion." He looks up from his phone. "I want to make sure I can be there when you start the moving in process."

"You don't have to come, you know." It sounds harsh even to my own ears and I don't mean it that way. Guilt gnaws at my insides, making my stomach turn.

He doesn't say anything and I feel shittier the longer I keep quiet.

"I didn't mean it that way," I say softly, looking to him as we turn down another hallway. "I meant… I don't know. I don't want you to feel like you have to come. I know you have other things to do."

Danny lets out a breath. "I know I don't have to. But I want to be there for you. As long as you'll have me, I'd love to help out."

God, he's way too good for me.

I don't know how to tell him the shit that's running through my head so I just nod instead. He probably chalks my silence up to nerves because he doesn't ask. He just follows along behind me silently and as soon as we're a few paces away from the admin offices, I feel a little bit of calm breathe back into my bones.

Nik's coming out of the office, schedule in hand. He's frowning as he nods to what Derek's telling him, but he flashes a smile at us when we pass.

Danny opens the door to the admin office and I follow him inside.

It's a guy working today and he looks up when we stop in front of him. "Need your class schedule?" he guesses, looking to his computer again. "Names?"

I guess a lot of people had the same idea as me. Wait until the last moment. Prolong the inevitable.

"Dash Baxter," I say.

He nods, typing it into his computer. It doesn't take him more than a minute to pull the information up. He starts it printing before he looks up again. "Okay, and you?" he looks past me, at Danny.

Danny shakes his head. "Already got mine. Thanks, anyway."

The guy nods and grabs my paper from the printer. "Here you are. Good luck getting through the halls – it's pretty insane already."

Danny laughs and I think I give a pretty decent smile before I turn away. My stomach's still tied in knots and I wish it'd fucking stop. Everything's fine. I'm fine. But I feel like I'm gonna vomit just from a stranger's smile.

I leave the admin office with Danny at my side. He's carrying my coffee now and I don't even remember passing it off to him. I'm pouring over my schedule, trying to make sense of it, when I almost run headfirst into someone.

The other person grabs my shoulders to stop us both from falling. "Whoa."

Sorry leaves my mouth before I see who it is. But a head of familiar black hair catches my attention and I instantly know who it is.

"It's cool," Blake says, smiling softly before he lets go of my shoulders. His bottom lip is split – a thin, jagged line that extends just under the curve of his lip. And there's a badly concealed bruise over his left eye. What the hell?

His stare lingers on the bruises on my own face and I can see the sympathy in his eyes just before he steps past me. "I'll get out of your way."

I turn to watch him go but Danny nudges my shoulder with his. "Come on, show me your schedule. Do we have English together again?"

I drag in a deep breath and turn back to my schedule. "Uhh… English, sixth period?"

Danny pumps one of the coffee cups in the air. "Yesss! We still got English. Okay, what's first period for you? I'm stuck with History." He makes a face before drinking from his cup.

"I have… social studies," I say, scanning the rest of the list. "Ugh, math is almost the last period."

Danny swallows down a mouthful of coffee. "Okay but if you have any free periods during the day, I might still be able to help you during the day. At least lunch hour, right? Tell me we have lunch hour together."

"I've got mine at twelve-thirty," I say.

He grins. "Sweet, same as me."

Knowing that Danny's with me at least twice during the day starts to chip away at the uneasiness that's been sitting in my gut all damn day. At least I won't be away from him all day. I think I'd go insane if I was.

"I have two free periods on Monday's," Danny says, sipping from his coffee again. "One after lunch and one during fifth period, too."

I scan my list. "Fuck yes, I've got fifth period free."

Danny laughs. "Damn, we lucked out, then." He's grinning when I look at him. "Good thing too. Maybe we can sneak away for the hour and make out in my car."

I feel my face heat up and when he laughs again, I gently shove my shoulder into his. "Shut up. And tell me where your History class is, I want to walk you to it."

"Nooo, I wanted to walk you to your class," he whines, pouting when I look at him again. "Pleeeease?"

Why the fuck is he doing this to me? His pout is fucking adorable. He's slowly killing me and I think he knows it.

"Stop, no. I'm walking you to yours," I respond, poking him in the rib with my finger. "And don't fight me on it, I'm not budging."

He rolls his eyes and sticks his tongue out. I fold my schedule, tuck it into my back pocket, and take my coffee from him. We walk to his History classroom together, drinking our coffee and generally avoiding everybody packed in the halls.

"I guess I'll see you at lunch then?" he says when we stop at the right classroom. "Unless we have a class together before then."

"Sounds like a plan." I hesitate for a second before I lean forward, pressing a kiss to his cheek. "Have a good class."

He blushes and scoffs. "Thanks for making my face red." He places his hand on my chest, letting out a breath. "You have a good class too."

I want to follow him into the class and sit through it with him. I wish we had every class together. But I just give him a smile and leave him behind.

Finding my own classroom is a little more difficult. I've been here four years now – how the fuck do I not know where room D724 is?

I retrace my steps multiple times but I can't find where it is. My social studies class was supposed to be on the other side of the hallway – opposite the English classroom on the second floor, but there's nothing here. It's just an empty passage leading to a janitor's closet. What the fuck?

"You lost too?" someone asks from behind me.

Blake's behind me, his own schedule in his hand. He has to move past a couple of guys lingering in the hallway before he can get to me.

"I've literally been down this way four times but there's no classroom here," he says, showing me his own schedule. "Do you think it's some kind of a misprint or something?"

I don't want to be an ass to him on our first day back. And I'd really rather go down to admin on my own but… it can't hurt to have him come along too. He's just as lost as I am.

"Maybe." I fold my schedule again. "Do you want to go down to the office with me?"

He lets out a breath, tugging at a strand of hair near the front of his head. "Ahh… I guess we have to, huh?" He looks up, slinging his backpack off his shoulder. He crams his schedule down into the top before zipping it closed again. "Yeah, I'll go there with you."

We leave the hall together and start for admin on the other side of the building. I'm subtle as I can as we walk but I watch him from the corner of my eye. I catch sight of a couple marks on his skin near the base of his neck. The majority of them are thin and extend down beneath the neck of his hoodie. They don't look like handprints, more like… lashes.

I come to a stop in the hall, heart constricting. I hate Blake for everything he's done to Danny. But he doesn't… no one deserves that.

"What?" Blake asks, stopping when I do.

My stomach clenches. This doesn't change what he did. But fuck, why is his dad doing this to him?

"Nothing. I thought I saw the room," I mumble, starting forward again. Blake hesitates for a second where I did before he catches up to me again.

When he adjusts his backpack, it tugs one side of his hoodie down and I see it again. I think the marks go all the way down his chest. I wonder how old they are. How recent his dad did that to him.

"Here we are," Blake says, stopping in front of the office. "I've been in here three times already today."

I shift my own backpack, letting out a breath. "Schedule stuff?"

"No, the new guy they hired is hot," he whispers, grinning as we step into the office together.

The guy looks up from his computer when we stop in front of the desk. He sees me first but smiles when he sees Blake. "Mr. Weston. Back again already?"

Blake smiles and there's something almost flirty about the look he's giving the guy. "Fancy meeting you here again, Ethan." He closes the distance between us and the counter, leaning against it with a sigh. "We can't find room D724? It's supposed to be our social studies class but it's not in the right hall."

Ethan frowns, glancing back to his computer. "It should be by the English classroom."

"Checked there already," I offer, joining them at the counter.

Blake drops his chin into his hand with another sigh when the bell rings. "We might be counted as tardy… I really don't want a mark first thing this semester…"

Ethan looks up from his computer, offering a small smile. "Don't worry, I'll walk you to the classroom and explain what happened."

"Oh, I don't want to get in your way," Blake says, darting his gaze away for a moment before he's looking at Ethan again. I'm a little embarrassed just standing next to him. Anything with eyes can see they're fucking flirting.

He laughs softly. "It's no trouble, honestly." He stands, nodding toward the exit. "Here, let me show you where it is."

I follow after the two of them, feeling like the most awkward third wheel in fucking history. But Ethan finds where the room is so I can't complain. He points out the 724 sign we clearly passed, saying the letter must have fallen off.

Ethan opens the door for us and I get a glimpse at the nearly full classroom. Our social studies teacher – Mr. Reynolds, according to our schedule – stops in the middle of his sentence. He turns toward us, raising an eyebrow. "Late on the first day?"

"It's alright, Mr. Reynolds," Ethan says, placing his hand on Blake's shoulder. "These two couldn't find the classroom. Apparently, you don't have the D anymore."

The class breaks out in hushed snickers and our teacher's face turns red. Ethan realizes what he said and quickly tries to backtrack – explain about the sign in the hall – but it's too late.

"Thank you for the insight, Mr. Chambers. Why don't you boys take your seats?" our teacher asks, turning to give us both a look. I have a feeling he's going to mark us late anyway.

Blake and I take the last two seats available, second row from the front. Blake's snickering at the look on our teacher's face and I bite the inside of my lip to keep from smiling too. As it is, Ethan's face is red.

"If you'll excuse me, Mr. Chambers… I do have a class to teach," Mr. Reynolds says, looking pointedly at Ethan, who's quick to take his exit.

Behind us, one of the guys I used to be on the basketball team with leans forward to tap Blake on the shoulder. "Since that guy wants the D so bad maybe you should volunteer, huh?"

I see the expression on Blake's face shift. It sends a shock through my system, knowing that it could be me. If people knew that I'm with Danny, they might say the same things about me. And even though Blake's been a shitty person in the past, he doesn't deserve this.

"Shut the fuck up, Zane," I spit, turning around to look at him. "The only action you get is when your step-mom kisses you goodnight."

His face turns red. "Yeah? At least I have a mom. Didn't yours run off with some guy?"

"He already told you to shut the fuck up," Blake snaps, turning around too.

Mr. Reynolds puts his hand down on Blake's desk. "How about all of you be quiet before I send you to the office?"

Zane scoffs. "Don't punish the rest of us. The fag started it."

I fucking see red. It's such a stupid, shitty word. And Zane's a fucking asshole for using it. I see the look on Blake's face – that mixture of anger and hurt. I know that feeling. Fuck, I lived it every day for years with Dad.

"You're an asshole," I say and Zane's gaze drifts to me. "Fuck off."

"Mr. Baxter," Mr. Reynolds calls sharply, shaking his head when I look to him. "One more outburst and I'll send you to the office. Is that clear?"

I let out a breath through my nose before I nod. "Yes."

Blake keeps silent, so I do too. Even though I want to turn around and clock Zane in his stupid face.

Mr. Reynoldswaits in front of us for another few seconds before he goes back to his own desk. Blake gets a notebook from his backpack and his social studies book, and I follow suit. Even though my mind's miles from here.

Anger's running through my veins like my own blood. I didn't think I could ever be angry for Blake. But I'm so goddamn furious.

I find a scrap of paper in my backpack five minutes into the teacher's lecture. It takes me a long fucking time to figure out what I want to say. But I scribble a few words down and subtly toss it onto Blake's desk.

It's not you. Zane's an asshole.

I try not to watch Blake read it, but I can't stop myself. I see him run his finger across the letters over and over again. Like he's committing them to memory. God, I wonder if anyone's ever said it to him. If he's ever heard that it's not his fault.

When he tosses the note back on my desk, I cover it with my hand. Mr. Reynolds is looking my way and I can tell that he thinks he saw something. The last thing Blake needs is this shit broadcast even more.

I wait until he's looked away from me before I open the note.

I know. Thanks for sticking up for me.

God, it makes my heart ache that I even had to. Zane's an ass. And Blake might be one too sometimes, but even he doesn't deserve that.

When's your lunch hour? Mine's 12:30.

Blake keeps the note for a long time. He opens and closes it multiple times. Even picks up his pencil once or twice. But he doesn't write anything. Not until halfway through the lesson.

You sure Danny wants me sitting with you?

Fuck. For a few minutes, I didn't even think about how Danny would feel about it. But… he told me he wants to fix things with Blake. I think if he were here, he'd ask him to lunch too.

He's fine with it. Do we have the same lunch hour?

I chew on the inside of my lip as he writes. He runs out of room on the back of the paper, so he tears off a the corner of a page from his own notebook. After a minute or two, he finishes his message and folds the two papers together.

Mr. Reynolds is going on about how some historian interpreted something,but he's looking our way again. We both pretend to be paying attention to what he's teaching and eventually, he looks away from us.

Blake tosses the papers onto my desk. He's watching me as I open the first one. But when I look toward him, he turns away. He trains his stare out the window, exhaling heavily.

I appreciate what you're trying to do but you don't have to. I know we're not friends anymore. Guys like Zane are everywhere. It's not that big of a deal. I don't want to mess up anything with you and Danny. I saw you kiss him in the parking lot. It's nice to see him happy again. I don't want to do something that wrecks that. Sit with him at lunch. I'll be fine.

He still won't look at me when I finish reading the note. I don't know what to say to him. I don't know how to explain that Danny's okay with Blake. That he wants to work things out so they can be friends. It's not my place to tell him that.

In the end, I can't think of the words I need to say. I can't come up with the right way to tell him that I don't hate him. Not entirely. Part of me still does. But… life is so much bigger and confusing than hating my boyfriend's ex. He did some fucked up things. I don't know if that means he's not worth saving but… fuck, a part of me really wants to save him.

When the bell rings, Blake's slow in getting up from his seat. Zane's one of the first ones out the door, shoving past the both of us to get to it. Blake gathers his things and I wait for him. Something about sending him out into the hall on his own doesn't sit right in my stomach.

"I'm in chem lab next," I say when Blake's finished gathering his stuff. "What's your next class?"

He shrugs his backpack on. "Same." He lets out a breath, looking up at me. "Weird, huh?"

If this was last semester, I'd probably have killed him by the end of one class together. But I don't know if I'm the same person anymore. I don't know if Blake is either.

"At least we won't be in with a bunch of strangers," I say, shrugging one shoulder. "I suck at chemistry though so… you might not want me as your partner."

Blake smiles at that, the skin crinkling across the bridge of his nose. "I'm pretty good in chemistry. It's one of my best subjects, actually."

"I think I'm a mess in everything, honestly. Academics… not really my strong point," I say, falling in step with him as we leave the classroom.

"Not true. I read one of your English papers," he says, craning his neck to look further down the hall. "Chem labs is dead ahead."

"You read one of my papers?" I ask, letting out a breath when he shrugs. "Which one?"

Blake chews on his lip, stepping out of the way as a group of girls come down the hall. "The last one. The final?"

Fuck. I wrote that after I found Danny alone in the woods. When I was strung out and scared. The paper was supposed to be about a day I'd relive differently. I wrote all the days I would have relived – starting with that night on the beach. When I should have kissed Danny. And then it was every day after that, every moment that I had a shred of a chance to tell him how I felt. I didn't use his name. But from the expression on Blake's face, I didn't need to.

"It was good. Kind of got lost in it, if I'm honest," Blake says, letting out a breath as he glances at me. "Anyway. If I had to guess… I think English is your best subject. Either way, we both know it's not math."

I'm still back on the paper. That he read it.

"How'd you get a hold of it?" I ask, my voice quiet to my own ears. "I only gave one copy to Mr. Lancer…"

Blake hesitates. "Sometimes… he leaves things lying out. I saw your name and got curious." He looks to me with a shrug. "Sorry."

Any other paper, I don't think that I would care. Or even remember it exactly. But that paper… that was one I put a little more of myself into than I usually do. I didn't go with the first thing that popped in my head or even take the easy way out. I actually wrote the paper the way Mr. Lancer probably wanted me to. I wrote it honestly.

"It really was good, though," Blake says softly as he slows to a stop in front of the labs. He looks away from me, running one hand through his hair. "I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass. You write well."

I don't know if that's true. I think it just comes easier to me than speaking does most days. If I write, it comes out better. If I speak, somehow I always fuck it up.

"Thanks," I mumble, following him into the classroom. We're two of the last students to show up. One look at the rest of the class forces words out of me that I'm not entirely sure I mean. "If we're allowed to pick partners… will you pick me?"

He sets his backpack down on the floor by one of the last empty lab desks. He doesn't say anything at first and he won't look at me. And I hate the waiting.

"I'm god-awful at chemistry. I could use your help," I say.

Blake exhales heavily, looking at me again. "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

He frowns. "Talking to me like nothing happened last semester. It's not like anything changed over winter break. I'm still me and you're still you." He hesitates for a second, letting out another breath. "You almost seem like you don't hate me anymore."

I think part of me does. Maybe I always will. But something's changed. He might have put his hands on Danny but his parents put their hands on him. It doesn't change what he did. Doesn't take it back. But… I can't ignore this feeling blooming in my chest.

"I don't think I hate you, Blake," I say, going for a half-truth.

He scoffs. "How can you not? I know you know about all the shit I did."

"Yeah… I do know," I say, holding his gaze when he meets mine. "There's no denying that… you did some fucked up things. But maybe that's not who you are. Maybe it's just what you did."

He lets out a breath, shaking his head. He turns away from me, settling down at the lab desk. After a few seconds of silence pass, I join him.

We don't talk until the teacher comes in. Ms. Hallis one of the youngest teachers here, but I get the feeling that she's not up for taking any of our shit. She does let us pick our own lab partners though, which I count as a win. Even though I can tell he's hesitant, Blake turns to me.

He props his elbow up on the desk, resting his chin in his palm. "So. How much am I gonna have to carry you this semester?"

"Probably the whole time," I say, smiling when he rolls his eyes. "I can help with your English papers if you need it."

He smiles then too, pushing away from the desk before rising from his chair. "We'll see. For now – let's get our experiment going. I'll get the supplies."

I'm not sure that the tension between us disappears that quickly. But when he's settled at the desk again and we start working together, I think some of it chips away. I don't know that I'm doing this for Danny anymore. Either way – I think Blake could use someone in his life. And maybe I could be that someone for once.

It's hard to pay attention in my next two classes. History has never been my favorite subject and I'm not that invested in learning French. I have the urge to switch it to Spanish since I didn't take it in my junior year like everyone else did. But I don't want it to seem like I'm trying too hard with the Moreno's. I don't have to speak their language just because they do.

By the time I hit the final class before lunch, I'm ready to cut early. I just want to see Danny again. And I hope to catch him before Blake does. I need to give him a heads up that I invited Blake to sit with us. Even though I could just text him… I feel like I should say it to his face.

Jeff's in world politics with me and he's quick to claim the empty desk next to me.

"You look better than you did this morning. Got your caffeine fix in you, huh?" he asks with a grin.

I roll my eyes but I smile too. "Please. At least I'm not like you. You have to get your daily fix of Star or you're in a terrible mood."

"Hey! That's not true."

He leans over to flick me on the arm but stops just short of it. His hand falls limply between us. I watch his gaze rake over the bruises again and I can't hold his stare.

"I know I'm not supposed to ask but…" he trails off, leaving it open for me to tell him.

I don't know what he wants me to say or even what the question really is. I guess he's asking how I am. Or if it still hurts or how things are going or… I don't know. I've never been any good at guessing.

"Ask what?" I prompt, keeping my gaze on my desk in the silence.

He hesitates and though he starts twice, he can't get the question fully out. It's like he's afraid to ask me.

"Just spit it out," I say, looking up at him now. I try to give him a halfway decent smile and I can see the tension it lifts from him.

"I've just been wondering how things are," he says softly. "Have you seen your dad again?"

That sends a shot straight through me. I forgot I told him that…. Forgot I saw Jeff the day after I snuck away to visit my dad.

"No, I haven't."

The words feel strangled coming out of me. Like someone else is saying them. Jeff doesn't ask for anything more, just nods. And I look away from him again, dragging in a breath to stay calm.

When our teacher comes in, I check out a little. I stare out the window, watching birds on the roof of the admin building. Until my phone lights up on the desk with Jeff's name on it.

From: Jeff

Sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable

And there was more I was gonna say about that but I didn't get the chance

I don't care that he asked. It doesn't matter. It's just weird to know that someone else knows about this. That it's not just between me and Alex anymore.

To: Jeff

It's fine

Ms. Thomasstarts calling on random people and I shrink down in my chair, hoping she doesn't call on me.

From: Jeff

But… things are good though, right? You're doing okay?

I've always thought okay was a relative word. If someone asked if I was okay, I had to define the question in my head. Was it in relation to school? Every day things? My mom skipping town? My dad and all his angry hits? What were they really asking me?

I don't think it's a relative word anymore. I think that people just want to know if I'm okay. And I think that some people appreciate a little honesty.

To: Jeff

Yes and no to be honest

There's a lot of shit going on right now and I'm trying to figure it out

I think I will be okay. It's just hard right now

Jeff makes a face as he reads my texts. For a split-second, I think I've handed honesty to the wrong person. But… how could I? It's Jeff.

"Dash Baxter?" the teacher calls on me.

I snap my gaze to the front of the classroom, heart lodged in my throat now. A few students in front of me have turned around to look. And I feel like they're all staring at the bruises. Not that I can fucking blame them, I look like a train-wreck.

"Yes?" I manage to ask.

"What's your experience with it?" she prompts, raising an eyebrow. She probably saw me watching Jeff. She knows I wasn't paying attention – she's just trying to make me look like an idiot.

I swallow hard. My heartbeat's pounding in my ears and it's difficult to breathe. I don't know why teachers do this.

"I… didn't catch the question," I say, slowly letting out a breath. "Can… can you repeat it?"

She gives me a look like I should have been paying attention and I wilt a little inside. "I asked how world politics have been affected by the changes in capitalism."

Heat crawls over me and my mouth's dry when I speak. "Um… I'm not sure. I haven't… really done any extensive research on it, so…"

I think Ms. Thomas wants to keep the attention on me – maybe ask me to take my best shot at an answer. But someone at the front asks a question. So, her gaze shifts from me and I breathe a quiet sigh.

My phone lights up just seconds later.

From: Jeff

Yeah, I totally get you. Shit's heavy when you're going through it. You'll make it out though. You're tough as nails

Hit me up if you ever want to get away for a while though. I'm always down to do whatever

Also RIP you, I hope she doesn't call on me

I stifle my snort and when the teacher looks my way again, I pretend I'm taking notes. She looks away again but I can tell she's watching from the corner of her eye. So I put my phone down on the desk again. Guess I'll have to wait until class is over.

"Is anyone throwing a party this weekend?" I ask as soon as the bell rings.

Jeff looks up from his phone. "I don't think so… the winter formal is in a couple weeks, though."

"Fuck, is it really?"

He gets up from his chair with a nod. "Yup. Star's really excited for it. Been helping decorate since early December. So… safe to say we're going." He looks at me with a grin. "You gonna ask you-know-who?"

I scoff, standing too now. "Maybe. But shut up."

We leave the classroom together, squeezing by people grouped in the halls. I don't know why but it feels like more people are here than there's ever been.

"Dude, I'm starving. I hope they're serving something good today," Jeff says, groaning loudly. "I bet it's gonna be meatloaf again."

Oh, right… lunch.

"Hey, listen," I say, catching Jeff by the arm to stop him. "Hang on, I need to tell you something."

He lets out a breath. "You can't tell me on the way to lunch? I'm starving!"

"Jeff," I call softly and he sobers up.

He gives me a nod. "I'm all ears. What's up?"

The words don't want to come to me at first. I don't know how to say what happened in social studies this morning. I almost feel like I'm betraying Blake in a way. But… Jeff's close to him. I think if the situation was reversed a little… if it was Danny who was catching this shit, I'd want to know. It's not the same – Jeff's not dating Blake. But he does care.

"I was in class this morning… with Blake," I start with.

Jeff lets out a breath slowly and I see the shift in him. "If he did something… can you just ignore it for now? I'm not saying excuse him or anything. I can talk to him later."

"No, he didn't… that's not it," I say in a rush, sinking my teeth into my bottom lip. I'm still not sure how to say it. But something is better than nothing. "One of the guys from the basketball team was picking at him. Saying… really shitty things. I know Blake was upset but he wouldn't admit it."

Jeff clenches his jaw, shifting his gaze from me down the hall. "Who was it?"

I look where he is, watching Zane with the other basketball players. I can't believe I was ever on a team with him. I guess shit like this really shows who your friends are.

"No one. Just one of the guys," I say, giving Jeff a look when he meets my gaze again. "I'm not going to tell you just so you can kick his ass."

"Blake doesn't deserve that shit," Jeff spits but his words lose heat as he says them. He practically fades out toward the end, letting out a breath. "I know that the shit he did to Danny was completely fucked up but-"

"But that doesn't mean he deserves this," I finish for him. He looks at me like I've grown a second head but I mean it. "It's the truth. I don't think anyone deserves this."

He nods slowly, glancing past me again.

"I told Blake to sit with me at lunch. I didn't know if you had the same lunch hour or not," I say slowly, watching the surprise on his face. "I don't know. I just didn't want him alone in there."

Jeff meets my gaze again, gently clapping me on the shoulder. "You're a good person, Dash. I don't know if you hear that enough or not but… damn. Thanks for looking out for him."

I just did what any decent human would do. And it wasn't entirely for Blake either. It was for me – and for all the shit I might get if I ever come out. It's for Danny and the hell he's been through. For Mitch and Dale. Kwan. Anastasia. Keith. For everyone in this town that isn't straight. Everyone that's ever had to pretend like the insults don't hurt.

In that classroom, I may have been standing up for Blake. But I think if I could… I'd be standing up for all of them. All of us.

Danny's not in the cafeteria when Jeff and I get there. I tell Jeff to go ahead and I wait out in the hall. I can't pretend that I'm not nervous. Danny said he wanted to be friends with Blake again. I just… I don't know how he'll feel about this.

My heart jumps when I see Danny coming down the hall. He's got his head down, looking as exhausted as I feel. But when he sees me, his expression brightens and he smiles. God, his smile is everything.

"Hey," he calls out, coming to a stop in front of me. He hesitates for a second but pulls me into a hug. "I missed you. How's your day been?"

I think my heart stops. He's just asking how my day's been. Saying that he's missed me. I don't know why it's making my heart flip around inside my chest. It's just Danny. My boyfriend.

"Missed you too," I say, dropping my chin onto his shoulder. He holds me close and I let out a breath slowly. "My day's been… interesting. How's yours been?"

He pulls away to look at me. There's something questioning in his gaze but he won't voice it. I know his concern is for me and I should really wait a little longer but…

"I asked Blake to sit with us at lunch." I blurt it out in a rush and I see the surprise on his face. "I'm sorry. I… should have asked if you'd be okay with it first."

Danny lets out a breath, shaking his head. "No, it's okay. I just… what happened? Why'd you do that?"

I don't know if I want to tell him the whole story. I didn't even tell Jeff all of it and I still feel like I've said too much. It's not like it happened to me. Blake should have the choice to tell someone or not.

"Some guy was being an asshole in our social studies class. I just… got the feeling that Blake could use friends around him for now."

Danny raises his eyebrows. "Friends, huh? I didn't know you still thought of him that way."

I don't know how I think of him exactly. I don't hate him. At least… not like I did. But I think we could be friends again. I think I can figure out how to navigate this with him.

I chew my bottom lip until Danny stops me. His touch on my skin sparks electricity where his fingers are.

"I… I don't think he should have to go it alone in his final semester. None of us should," I admit, shrugging when Danny gives me a look. "I'm not just doing this because you want to be friends with him again. I think he needs people."

"Wow." He drops his hand from me with a smile. "That's a really mature thing to do. Kinda proud of you, honestly."

I think I blush – I know my face heats up. But I can't help it. Danny makes my face red and he makes my heart beat harder than it ever has before. I want to kiss him right here but I don't want the other people in the hall to see. I don't want to give someone that kind of ammunition against me. Him. They already have enough.

"You ready to go in then?" he asks, sliding his hand into mine. He interlaces our fingers together and starts leading me down the hall. But I'm not ready yet.

"Hang on a sec," I say, tugging on his hand.

He stops, turning around to look at me. "Yeah?"

I know my face is flushed. I don't need the rising heat to tell me that. But I can't help it – how can I not blush as I ask him this?

"I have a question for you. And… I don't know. I didn't want to assume, I wanted to actually ask you, I just…" I trail off, dropping my stare from his when he frowns.

A few people are going into the cafeteria, and though the urge hits me, I don't pull my hand from Danny's.

He waits a few seconds in silence before he squeezes my hand in his. "Ask me what?"

I meet his gaze. "Do you… want to go to the winter formal with me?"

The heat on my face must be nothing compared to what his feels like. His whole face turns red – all the way up to his hairline and across his ears.

"Shit, Dash," he says, half-turning from me with a quiet laugh. "Why'd you ask me that now? I have to go be in front of people with my face like this."

I can't help the grin pulling at my mouth. "So that's a yes, then?"

Danny looks back toward me with a smile. "Yes. Of course it's a yes, how could I say no to you?"

He glances past me, scanning the hall, before he leans forward to press a kiss to my cheek. And it's my turn to blush darker.

"Come on. I'm ready for some food," he says, squeezing my hand once more before he leads me over to the cafeteria doors.

We step inside together and he pulls his hand from mine. I don't know if it's an unconscious thing or not but after this morning… I can't blame him.

"Hey guys," Danny calls out for the both of us.

Dale gives a wave as we approach, and Mitch turns around to look at us. I shift my stare past him. Jeff is sitting close with Blake, talking quietly. Blake's stare is trained off into the distance, his gaze empty, as Jeff rambles on beside him. I've done that withdrawn thing. Kwan always tried to pull me out of it but it didn't always work. Sometimes I just wanted him to leave me the fuck alone.

"Is he boring you like he did to me in our world politics class?" I ask, sinking down in the chair across from Blake.

He shifts his gaze from the rest of the cafeteria to me. Jeff falls silent next to him and one corner of Blake's mouth tucks upward. "That class is boring enough without Jeff's constant talking."

"Hey! It wasn't constant," Jeff responds but when he meets my gaze, I think he knows what I'm trying to do. "It's not like you were bringing anything interesting to the conversation."

I give an exaggerated eye-roll. "I'm a way better conversationalist. Ask anyone."

"What are we asking people?" Paulina asks as she joins us at the table. She slides her lunch tray next to Danny, sitting down with him. She looks between us. "What, you two aren't getting food?"

Danny puts his hand on my shoulder when I start to get up. "I'll get ours. What do you want?"

"Whatever's fine with me. Not that meatloaf though. I'll get chips or something from the vending machines if that's all that's over there," I say and he nods before starting away from me.

I watch him go for a few seconds before I look away again. And everyone at the table is fucking staring at me.

"What?" I ask, even though I think I know what they're looking at me for. And my face heats up again at just the thought of this conversation.

Paulina's grinning, delicately licking yogurt off the back of a plastic spoon. "You two are so adorable together."

"I've been thinking the same thing," Jeff says, laughing when I flip him off. "What? We're not gonna say anything. But I think it's gonna be pretty obvious to the rest of our friends too."

Great. Just what I need – more people to potentially tease the hell out of me about this. I already get it enough between Alex, Anastasia, and Kwan. I don't need a whole team of people ready with teasing remarks.

"You guys should have seen them in the parking lot together," Blake says, smiling when I look his way. "Seriously. I don't know what the hell took them so long."

The old me would have chucked an insult back. Blamed him for the distance and time it took us. But it's not Blake's fault. It was ours. We took our time and maybe that's not a horrible thing.

"So how'd it happen? How'd you ask him out or… however you did it?" Paulina asks.

They're all staring at me again and I really don't want to tell this story. It's not like a movie worthy story. It was hard. I didn't tell him anything – I just kissed him. I'd been through hell and Danny was there and I was so fucking sad. I just wanted to stop hurting. I wanted to stop waiting for the right moment to kiss him.

"It's… kind of a long story," I say.

Jeff whines. "Oh come on, holding out on the details? We need to hear this, you know. It'll be the story I can bring up in my best man speech at your wedding."

I choke at that. Some strangled noise leaves me and even though Jeff laughs, my face still colors. Fuck him, we just started dating. He's bringing up a wedding already?

"Fuck off. That's why Kwan will be my best man." I practically spit the words at him but he's grinning just the same. "Like you and Star aren't destined for an early wedding."

Jeff shrugs. "True but… that's an easy dig to make for me. We probably will end up married."

"Honestly, we should just start taking bets on when you're gonna ask her," Dale says, smirking when I glance his way. "I give him three months into college."

"Definitely before then," I say, grinning when Jeff rolls his eyes. I look to Blake, who's staring off into the distance again. "What do you think, Blake? You think he could last three months into college?"

Blake lifts his shoulder but doesn't offer a response. Damn… Zane really got to him.

"I think he could probably wait a little longer than that," Mitch says, shrugging when Dale and I look at him. "I don't know, I feel like Jeff's the type of person to really plan out something like a proposal, you know?"

Jeff smiles softly, sparing Blake another glance before he looks at the rest of us. "So you're all technically wrong, but… yeah I am the type to plan a proposal. It's just not gonna take me that long to ask her."

Paulina looks up from her tray, raising her eyebrows. "Are you serious? You're gonna ask her before you guys go to college?"

"No, more like… before we even graduate."

"Wait, hang on… you're serious? You're actually going to ask her?" Paulina asks, glancing at the rest of us. "Is he pulling my leg or something?"

Jeff shrugs. "Star's always said that she'd want to get married in the spring so… I figure we have time to plan something small before then."

"But you guys are so young!" Paulina says, shaking her head when Jeff shrugs again. "No, seriously. What's with the rush?"

He doesn't answer immediately, the noise of the cafeteria loud in the sudden silence. And for just a second, he meets my gaze.

Just as quick as the moment happened, it's gone. He looks back to Paulina with a soft smile. "I don't know, I've been thinking about it. I know we're meant to be together, so why wait?"

Paulina lets out a breath. "Fine, okay. But please tell me when you're going to ask her. I need to make sure that she has her nails done and looks good for pictures. She'll kill me if I don't."

Jeff smiles and I think he meant it. I think he's actually going to propose to Star this year. They don't have to get married just because she's pregnant. But they're both so obviously in love… it makes sense. Why wait?

"Who's gonna be your best man?" Dale asks, puffing out his chest with a grin. "Say me and I'll fund your honeymoon courtesy of my parents credit cards."

Jeff laughs, shaking his head as Danny joins us at the table again.

"I got you a Dr. Pepper," he says, passing it over to me. He only got one tray but there's enough food loaded on here for both of us. He pushes the tray in between us, unwrapping a plastic fork before he hands it over to me. "So, what are we talking about?"

He stabs a piece of watermelon and pops it into his mouth before looking up. His face colors when he realizes everyone else is staring at him. "Wh-What?"

Paulina's grinning. "Oh, nothing. We just think you two are so cute together."

"I didn't tell them," I say when he looks at me. "You know how they are."

Jeff makes a noise. "I'm offended by whatever you mean with that."

Danny lets out a breath slowly, looking back at the others. "Okay, well… you have to keep this quiet, okay? We don't want the whole school to know yet."

"Not a problem. My lips are sealed," Jeff promises, doing the stupid cross my heart and hope to die thing.

Paulina's quick to agree but it's Blake who gets Danny's attention.

"Being out in this town is like wearing a giant 'kick me' sign all the time," he says it quietly, like he's afraid of attracting attention. "Swear to you, I won't tell a soul."

His words cause a visceral reaction in Danny. His breath catches when he inhales – and color rises in his cheeks as his eyes widen. They've both come so far. I don't think this is the Blake he dated in freshman year. This is a new person sitting across from us now.

Danny nods slowly, dropping his gaze back to the tray. I take a few blueberries for myself and watch him chew a bite of the croissant before he looks up again. "So… what were you guys talking about?"

"Jeff's gonna propose to Star this year," Mitch says.

Danny's mouth opens and he looks to Jeff. "Wait, seriously?"

"Yeah and he won't tell us who's gonna be the best man at the wedding," I say, grinning when Jeff rolls his eyes.

"Relax, everybody. It's still a little ways off. I still need to talk to my parents about… everything. It's not like I'm popping the question tonight," he says but he still smiles with the words. "Eventually I'll need to choose a best man. But not any time soon."

"You're weak, Jeff. Natural selection is coming for you," Blake says, lobbing a fry his way. "Where is Star anyway?"

He looks up at the clock. "History class right now. Her lunch hour is the one after this." He shrugs when he looks back at us. "I have a free period after this so… I'll just spend it with her anyway."

"Oh, how romantic," Paulina says, batting her eyes at him.

Danny looks between us again. "Are we the only ones with the same lunch hour?"

"I thought Kwan had our lunch hour," Jeff says, craning his neck to look out into the cafeteria. "Keith too… maybe they don't?"

Danny snorts quietly. "That's why then. They're probably together somewhere."

I nudge him with my elbow and he blanches, looking up at me. He mouths 'shit' but it's too late. Jeff asks what he means by it. I think Jeff already knows that Kwan's gay but I don't know about Keith.

"Kwan got Keith hooked on this word game over the holidays," I say, looking back at Jeff with a shrug. "Keith's apparently determined to beat Kwan's score."

Jeff gives me a look like he doesn't believe me. And I can tell from the look on Blake's face that he definitely doesn't believe me. But it's not me or Danny's right to talk about.

"Yo, Dash," someone says and I turn at the sound. Nik claps me on the shoulder, giving me a grin. "How's it going?"

"Hey," I say, glancing at my friends. "Do you want to join us?"

Nik shakes his head, walking backwards now as he moves away from the table. "Nah, I gotta meet Derek and the gang for lunch. I'll see you around, yeah?"

"Yeah, see you," I call after him, watching as he turns around and moves further into the cafeteria.

"Dude – slumming with freshman?" Dale asks, giving a low whistle that Mitch rolls his eyes at.

"Actually, I think he's a junior," Danny says.

Dale makes a noise, turning around to watch Nik's retreating back. "Naaah, I call bullshit. He's way too young."

"He's a sophomore," I say, earning Dale's attention again.

"Well, either way, he seemed nice," Paulina says, smiling when I look at her.

I nod. "Yeah, he is. He's one of Alex's cousins, he's pretty cool."

Danny slides the tray a little closer to me, pressing a plastic fork into my hand. "Eat."

I grin, stabbing a piece of fruit and popping it into my mouth. He rolls his eyes and I look at the rest of the table.

"So this winter formal thing," I start, glancing between everyone. "Are you all going?"

"You know I am," Jeff says, looking at Paulina. "Star said that the rest of you girls are going in a group, right?"

Paulina nods, taking a bite out of her own granola bar. "Yup. Except we uninvited Roxane because… fuck that." She tries to be casual about it but she slowly looks toward Blake. All of us do.

He lets out a breath, dropping his stare down to his fries. "I'm not going anyway. I don't care if she does."

"Why aren't you going?" I ask but the look on Jeff's face tells me he already knows. Going by the marks I can still see the edges of on his collarbones… I think Blake's parents probably have something to do with it.

Blake shrugs like it doesn't matter. "Dances have never been my thing." He hesitates a second before he looks up. I guess he's going for a little honesty. "Hard to dance with someone when you're still in the closet."

Danny groans softly, reaching across the table. He puts his hand on top of Blake's and I can tell it surprises Blake. "You should come anyway. We'll go together in a group."

"It's fine. I don't really care about going. It's not like it's prom," he says with a shrug. "Don't worry about it. You guys go. Just spike the punch in my honor."

Jeff laughs, clapping Blake on the back. "You got it."

We're all finished before the bell's even rung. Dale and Mitch disappear to the library – most likely to make out in between the stacks somewhere. But the five of us linger in the hall together, talking about our weekend plans. And even though I'm not entirely sure that I want to tell them yet, words spill from me.

"I moved out of my dad's home," I say softly, the words barely out of my mouth before I regret them. They change the mood instantly and I can see the hesitation it creates.

Blake's the first to recover from it. "Good. You should get as far away as you can." He pauses there, hesitation leaking into his tone now. "You… are happy about it, right?"

I can only nod but at least I manage to do that. It takes Danny sliding his hand into mine just to breathe right again.

"I'm sorry, Dash," Paulina says, surging forward to take my other hand. "You shouldn't have to deal with this."

Her words make it hard to swallow. Alex is always telling me that I don't deserve the shit my parents have put me through. Danny says it too. Kwan's said it my whole life. But still… every time I hear it, I find it hard to believe. Both my parents have put me through hell. I'm the common denominator here. How could it not be my fault?

"It's okay," I say, squeezing her hand. "I'm fine."

"Where'd you go?" Jeff asks, his arms folded over his chest when I look at him. "You moved out of your dad's place but like… where'd you move into?"

I chew on my bottom lip, aching for just a little bit of calm to flood my veins again. "With Alex. I-I moved in with him and his girlfriend. We're… actually looking for a house right now. They've been talking about… not having enough space in the apartment."

Jeff smiles then. "Damn, dude. That's incredible. I'm really happy for you."

Relief floods my veins now. I don't know why I ever thought they wouldn't be happy for me. It's not like I'm talking to Mom. These people actually care about me. They always have.

There's so much I want to say to him – to all of them – but I don't get the chance.

"Dash Baxter to the administrative office. Dash Baxter to the administrative office."

My heart nearly stops for a second. The last time I was called over the intercom, my dad was waiting for me. Just thinking about it now causes this ugly feeling to twist in my gut.

Danny notices the shift in me. He holds my hand tighter. I think he's remembering that day too.

"Want me to blow offclass and go with you?" he asks softly.

I shake my head. He can't always come with me and hold my hand. I can do shit like this on my own. And even if I can't… I have to stand on my own again sometime.

"No, it's okay. It's nothing," I say, looking to Danny. I have to force the smile a little and I think he can tell. "It's probably just Alex stopping by to check up on me. You know how he is."

Danny gives a small nod but I can tell he's not convinced. I pull my hand from his and nod down the hall. "I'll just… go there now. When's your break again?"

"Fifth period," he says softly, giving me a smile. "Meet me in the library then?"

I give him a thumbs up and I almost turn to leave but… it's just my friends in the hall now. Everyone else is either in the cafeteria or in classrooms. No one's gonna see us. So I close the distance between us and press my lips to his.

He tastes like the fruit we shared. Like the coffee he had this morning. It's a sweet taste. One that I've already gotten used to.

Jeff's grinning when I pull away but I don't pay him any attention. I've got my gaze fixed on Danny. On the way he's shyly biting his bottom lip. On the beautiful flush that's coloring his cheeks. I hope I'm always this captivated by him.

"I'll text you, okay?" I say and he relaxes then.

He nods once before leaning up to kiss me again. He molds his lips to mine but it's just a quick kiss. It's not the passionate, heady kisses we traded in Alex's bedroom over winter break. It's not the needy, frantic ones he pressed all over me in his car the night his parents were fighting. It's just a soft kiss. An innocent, gentle kiss. But I love it just the same.

I pull away from him again and this time, he lets me go. I still feel his kiss on my lips even as I start away from him.

I make it all the way to the admin office before the nerves hit me. I can picture Dad waiting behind one of those doors for me. Waiting to tell me that he's seen my empty bedroom. Demanding that I come home.

My breath sticks in my throat but I step into the office. And I drag up words that shake on the way out.

"Someone… called for me?"

The guy behind the desk – Ethan – looks up from his computer. He frowns just a little, like he's trying to place me, before he nods. "Oh, right. Coach Brimfield wanted to see you." He uses a pen to point in the right direction. "He's in there."

Oh. It's just Coach looking for me. I can handle a conversation with him.

I open the door slowly. He's sitting on a couch, staring down at some sheets of paper, but he looks up when I come in.

"Hey," he greets me with, getting up from the couch. "I heard you really impressed the guys down at Amridge. They called me as soon as you left, talking you up."

That makes me smile. I thought I might have screwed that up but… I guess not.

"And I heard from DALV,too. They want to fly you out to their campus next month. Have you look around and meet some of the players," he says with a grin. "We'll talk specifics when I know more, but there's more. Over winter break, I heard from six additional schools interested. I've already sent them your highlight reel. We'll see what we hear from there."

I can't help but grin. He's still sending out my highlight tape. He still thinks I could have more opportunities. I didn't know that Coach believed in me this much.

"Thank you," I say, and though my voice sounds small to my own ears, I think he knows I mean it. How could I not? He's done so much for me all these years.

He reaches out to me, placing his hand on my shoulder. "You're welcome. But… this college stuff isn't the only reason I called you in here today." He lets out a breath, shaking me just a little. "I think you know what's coming here, son."

I try to read the expression on his face but… there's not much to get from a frown. I shake my head. "What's up?"

He frowns deeper, his gaze roaming over my face now. "These bruises of yours… and a few of your teachers mentioned seeing welts on your back?"

Fuck. How has any seen those? It's not like I've been streaking through the halls. How could anyone have seen those marks?

"I know who your father is. I know the… position he's in," Coach continues, oblivious to how short my breaths are coming now. "But this is… I mean, what am I supposed to assume here, kid?"

I don't know what to tell him. If it were me in his place, would I react any differently? He's just trying to help. And a few months ago, I would have bullshitted my way through this – told him I didn't need any help. But it's true this time. I have Alex and the rest of the Moreno family looking out for me now.

"That I can handle it," I say softly.

Coach scoffs. "You're covered in bruises. How is this handling it?"

I lift one shoulder but there's no strength with the action. I can handle it. Or… I was handling it. I've got Alex now.

"For the record… I am living with someone else now," my voice is practically a whisper now and it doesn't escape Coach's notice.

He squeezes my shoulder again, letting out a breath. "Yeah? Who is this someone else?"

"His name's Alex," I say, blowing out a breath before I look up at him. "Alex Moreno. He owns the auto-garage a couple miles from here."

Coach's brow furrows and he looks like he's trying to place the name. "Right, I think I know who you're talking about." He makes a soft, considering noise in the back of his throat. "Okay, have him meet me here sometime this week."

"Are you serious?"

He shrugs. "It's better that I know who you're living with rather than have to make a few phone calls, right?"

It's not like anyone in this town would do anything even if he did. My dad's the chief of police. What could anyone do to him?

"Fine," I mumble, shrugging his hand off me. "I'll tell him when I get home."

Coach pats me on the shoulder before stepping back. "Attaboy. Here, give this to him." He hands over a card with his name and phone number on it. "Tell him to give me a call to let me know which day he'll stop by. I'll clear some time for him."

Great. Just what I need. The two of them meeting is high on the list of shit-that-shouldn't-happen. Alex will tell him anything he asks about. I don't need him knowing about the condition my rib is in right now. It'll heal. But if Coach is worried about me at all, I can kiss any spring charity games goodbye.

I leave the office, clutching an excuse note Coach wrote up for me. I pull my phone from my pocket when I'm halfway down the hall.

To: Danny

Everything's fine. Coach just wanted to talk to me about college stuff

I don't know if he's left his volume on or not, but I kinda hope he's willing to text during class. Fuck, I miss him already.

I head down the hall to my Literature class even though all I want to do is find Danny and kiss him until neither of us can think anymore.

My phone vibrates twice just before I reach the classroom. So I slow my pace and read his words over and over again.

From: Danny

Oh, that's good! How'd it go?

I'm so proud of you! :)

I smile down at his message, reading his words over twice before I close out of his messages. I tuck my phone into my back pocket and drag a breath in as I push open the classroom door.

Ms. Clark – the new teacher –looks over from where she's writing on the whiteboard. Her eyebrows raise when her gaze flits over the bruises. "May I help you?"

"This is… I'm supposed to be in this class," I stammer out. I close the few feet of distance between us and hand over the note Coach wrote for me. "Sorry I'm late."

She reads over the note, nodding once. "Alright. Take a seat." She points to the front row with her marker but my insides shrivel at the thought of sitting there. I spy Dale at the back, an empty chair next to him so I go there instead.

"Hey, do you think this new teacher's hot?" Dale asks before I've even sat down.

I drop my backpack between us and slide into the chair. "Are you joking?" I whisper back.

He shakes his head. "No, I heard some guys talking about her in the hallway. I don't think she is, but I'm gay so my opinion is apparently worthless," he says, rolling his eyes. "What do you think?"

I glance to the front of the class, shrugging one shoulder. "She's okay."

"That's what I thought." Dale collapses back in his chair with a sigh. "People are so fucking stupid lately."

I think I get what he's not saying. It's not just people. It's the assholes like Zane in this place. I don't know why they feel like they have to comment about shit like this. No one's asking them to date guys – why the fuck do they care?

"You know Zane from the basketball team?" I ask and Dale nods, slouching down further in his chair. "He was being an asshole in my social studies class this morning."

Dale sighs. "Yeah, he's kind of always been that way." He looks toward me. "What was he saying?"

I don't think it needs to be repeated. Everything he said was just stupid. And it wasn't even directed at me so it's not really my shit to talk about.

"It's… he was talking to Blake," I say.

Dale groans. "Well, assholes tend to stick together."

"No, I mean… Zane was being an ass to Blake," I say, hesitating a second before I continue. "I get the feeling that maybe he's said things to Blake before. Cause… Blake seemed used to it."

He shrugs. "Does it matter?"

"Dale," I call his name softly and he sighs. "Come on, he's still… he's like us too."

"Please." He turns to look at me a little more. "He's nothing like us. He'd have to have a soul to be anything close to us."

I don't think Blake's as far gone as Dale seems to think. I don't know. I can't ignore the things that Blake has done but… I think he's got some good left in him. I think he could change. And in a couple of ways… I think he already has.

I slouch in my own chair, turning my attention to the front of the classroom again. Literature is one of those subjects I've never really had trouble paying attention to. But the longer Ms. Clark goes on about the symbolism of The Cather in The Rye, the more I feel myself quietly slipping toward a coma.

When my last class ends, Danny texts me – telling me to meet him in the gym. I give a fist bump to Mitch before I head down the hall. Music spills from the gym as soon as I push one of the doors open.

People are moving around in the gym, decorating for the winter formal. Guessing by the state of things so far, I think the theme has something to do with the color blue.

Danny's on a ladder near the back of the gym, laughing as Paulina tosses up a streamer roll to him. He just barely catches it, the ladder wobbling precariously as he leans forward to grab it. Star steadies the ladder, mouthing something up at him that he just laughs at.

I cross the gym, my backpack weighing heavily against my still healing back. Danny's taping the streamer in place when I stop at the bottom of the ladder.

"Need some help?" I ask, smiling when he turns to look.

His face lights up as he grins. "Just a sec. One more piece here and then we're gonna move the ladder."

Danny turns back to the wall, taping the final piece in place before he starts climbing down the ladder. Paulina and Star steady the ladder as he climbs and there's this distinct, blooming feeling in my chest. Like spring's arriving – with black hair and a paint-stained t-shirt.

"When did you change?" I ask when he's down the ladder.

He grins, closing the distance between us. He presses a kiss to my lips – stealing my breath with the small action.

"My last period is free, remember? I've been decorating for like an hour now," he says, grinning when I pull on the hem of his t-shirt. "I borrowed this from one of the guys that's helping decorate. We were painting set pieces earlier."

"Set pieces?" I ask.

Danny grins, sliding his hand into mine before he turns back to the girls. "Hey, give me a minute. I'm gonna walk around and show him what we've done."

"Kay. I'll text Jeff and make him come help," Star says, giving a small wave before she pulls her phone from her back pocket.

I give her and Paulina a final, fleeting glance before Danny's pulling me behind him. His hand is warm in my own and just the thought of it makes me sweat. There's barely anyone here and… they're probably not paying attention. But what if someone sees?

"Hang on," I say, tugging my hand from his. "I'm just gonna… text Alex. Let him know I'm not headed home right away."

Danny nods, that glowing smile never leaving his expression. "Okay. But first, look over there. See those lights coming down from the rafters? I helped put those up!"

His voice takes on a note of confidence as he turns to point out white balloons he helped twist into large snowflake shapes. I can't help but watch his face – still so lit up – as he talks about the things he's helped out with here.

"I didn't know you were this into school functions," I say.

Danny shrugs, looking at me for a split second before he's gazing out into the gym again. "Eh. I like helping out."

To: Alex

Helping Danny with an after school thing. I'll be home later

I look up from my phone when the text sends. At the angle his face is turned, I can see a spot of light blue paint dotted on the underside of his chin.

"So, you said you were painting set pieces?" I ask, reaching out for him when he turns back to me. I run my thumb over the paint dot, smiling at the blush forming on his face.

He lets out a strangled noise, nodding slowly before he catches my hand, pulling it away from his face. "You're making it hard to think."

I can't help but grin. "Me? How?"

Danny rolls his eyes, letting go of my hand. "Yes… set pieces. I worked on these huge double doors we're gonna have set up near the back of the gym," he turns to point, spreading his hands wide like he's picturing. "They'll be decorated with snowflakes and we're gonna have lights cascading down them – they're gonna be perfect for photos, I can't wait."

"Yeah? Where are they now?" I ask, turning to look behind me.

"They're still drying right now. I don't want to go in there and disturb the people still working, but I'll show them to you tomorrow," he says, smiling when I turn to look at him.

I shrug my backpack off, relief flooding through me at the lack of weight against my back. Danny frowns at the movement, but I don't give him long to dwell on it.

"Tomorrow, huh? You planning on seeing this all the way through?" I ask.

His gaze slowly leaves my backpack. "I am. At least until-"

Danny stops, cocking his head to one side. Before I can ask, his face lights up in a grin. "Oh my god, I love this song."

I look up at the ceiling, the subtle thrum of music flowing from the speakers overhead. "Yeah? What is it?"

He scoffs when I drop my gaze to him. "You know what this is."

"Do I?"

He feigns shock, gently swatting me on the arm. "Shut up! This is the greatest boy band to ever exist!"

I frown, glancing toward the ceiling again. "This doesn't sound like N'SYNC…"

"Oh my god, not them. It's One Direction."

I drop my stare back to him, raising my eyebrows. "Seriously? You think those guys are better than N'SYNC?"

"Uhh… hello? Five hot guys in one band?" Danny fans himself with his hand and I catch the subtle pink blooming across his face. He tries to play it off, scoffing lightly. "I mean… I thought they were when I was younger."

I can't help but grin. "Tell me this… did younger you ever go to one of their concerts?"

His face turns from pink to red and he quickly averts his gaze. Damn, the things that blush makes me wanna do…

I feel heat across my own face but Danny looks up at me, leaning forward to tug my backpack from my hand. He sets it down on the floor, nudging it behind him with his foot.

"Dance with me," he says, taking my hands in his.

I blink, that heat fully washing over me now. "What?"

He slides one of my hands onto his waist, smiling as he puts one of his hands on my shoulder. He takes my other hand in his, holding tightly despite the shakiness in my own hand. "I said… dance with me. It's good practice."

I can't meet his stare as I try to lead us in a clumsy version of the waltz. I've never done much dancing – I think Paulina got me on the dance floor all of once. In freshman year.

"Sorry, I'm not… I've never been good at dancing," I mumble, after stepping on his toes for the third time.

Danny laughs. "You're not bad. Your movements are just a little stiff."

The heat spreads down my neck, but I manage a nod. He readjusts his hold on my shoulder, standing on his tiptoes to press a kiss to my lips.

My heart skips a beat in my chest – I think he'll always have that effect on me.

When he pulls away from the kiss, he slides his hands from my shoulder. "Until you get the hang of it… I can lead."

Danny repositions my hands so I've got one on his shoulder and he has one of his on my waist – our other hands clasped together. He gives me a smile as he drops his gaze to our feet.

"Pay attention to your movements here, okay? Just follow me."

My palm is sweaty in his when I readjust my grip, but he only smiles and holds my waist tighter. He repeats the same four numbers in sequence – one, two, three, four – gently nudging me backward when I forget where the hell my feet are supposed to be. After six or so repeats, I'm starting to get the hang of it.

"Yo, Twinkletoes!" someone calls from across the gym.

I let go of Danny, a chill running through me as I turn to look at the voice. Jeff's standing by the back wall with Star, waving. Relief spreads through me when I realize who it is.

"You two losers aren't gonna practice your curtsy over there while I'm busting my ass," he calls.

I laugh, anxiety clear in the noise. I turn to look at Danny with a smile. "You, uh… ready to go help again?"

Danny shrugs, grabbing my backpack before he slides his hand into mine again. I lead the way over to our friends, only letting go of his hand when we come to a stop in front of Star and Paulina.

They're quick to give the two of us instructions, and we get into a good rhythm of working together. Between putting up streamers and inflating the last of the balloons, I almost forget how nervous I was today.

"You want to get dinner together?" I ask when we're done in the gym, heading down the hall together.

He shakes his head, pushing open the front door. "I wish I could. My parents are having a guest over for dinner so… I need to be there."

Ugh. It feels like they always want him home lately. When is it my turn to want him around for hours? Why can't he just come home with me for a little while?

"Oh… that's okay. Maybe next time," I say.

Danny shrugs, giving me a smile as we cross the parking lot. I don't speak again until we come to a stop by his car and he opens the passenger door for me.

"Do you have to go straight home?" I ask.

He snorts. "I never go anywhere straight." He leans forward to tousle my hair, grinning widely when I squawk at him to stop. "Hang on, we'll talk in the car."

I wait while he closes my door and crosses over to the driver's seat. But as soon as he's seated and the door's closed again, I'm all over him.

A surprised noise squeaks out of him but he melts under my touch, kissing me back just as fiercely. I've missed him. We've only been apart for a few hours today but god, I've missed him. His kiss and his touch is something I'll never get used to.

"I missed you," I say between kisses.

He moans in response but it says enough. It says everything. His nails scrape along my scalp and though there's some lingering pain, it's exhilarating feeling his nails against my skin.

"C-Can we… park somewhere and make out?" I ask and he groans softly, sliding his tongue in my mouth when I part my lips for him.

He drags me closer to him even though there's no space left between us. I'm basically straddling him at this point and it's like a shock to my system. Everything is coming alive in me right now. I've never been one to get a hard-on in the school parking lot but… I never planned on Danny.

"God, you're so… fuck," he whispers when he breaks away for air. He's panting and his hands are trembling just a little as he places them on my face. "I've gotta… go home. R-Remember?"

"Right away?" I ask, knowing I'm pushing for too much. He doesn't have to give in to anything I want. But I'd love it if he could spare a little more time to make out with me. And if we go somewhere else… if we get the chance, maybe we could do a little more than make out.

Danny groans again, dragging me back to press another kiss to my lips. I don't think he knows what his noises are doing to me. Or how the kisses he's pressing to my skin makes every one of those butterflies in my stomach take flight.

He pulls away from me a little more, turning his head to kiss my neck now. He pulls a groan from me this time, but his words are quick to do far more than that.

"I can… take a little detour on the way home."

Danny takes us to the outlook. He parks his car and unbuckles his seatbelt but he leaves the radio playing softly in the background. I don't know what station he's put on – it doesn't matter.

My hands are clammy, and I feel like he can tell when I reach for him. I don't know if he's as nervous as I am but… I think I want this. We've shared so much with each other at the outlook – why not this too?

Danny kisses me. He's gentle at first but it quickly turns rough again. Passionate. I fall apart with his every touch but he always brings me back. And soon he's tugging his shirt over his head and I'm touching his warm skin with my fingertips. God, it feels good to touch him.

We move to the backseat slowly – still connected at the lips – and when he lays back, I straddle him. My tongue's in his mouth, his hands are in my hair and it's like a breath of heaven. Like Danny's all I'll ever need.

I've got my hands all over him and he tugs at my clothes, aching to tear them off, too. I don't want him to see the burns on my back. They're covered in gauze but still. I know he'll ask how they are and I don't have anything to tell him.

"Are you… sure you want to do this?" Danny asks, his breath hot against my skin. He ducks down to kiss my collarbones, tugging the collar of my hoodie out of his way. I love feeling his lips against my skin. It's like he's breathing life back into my bones.

I don't think I've ever wanted him more than I do in this moment. And my body's reacting to him – his chest warm against my own. And though the movement and the friction between us makes my bruises hurt worse, this is worth a little pain. He'll always be worth my pain.

"Y-Yeah," I stammer back, pressing a kiss just behind his ear. "I want you."

He groans again, driving me wild with his noises. "I want you too. God, so much."

I close what little distance is between us, driving him further down on the backseat. He scratches at my scalp again, shifting on the seat until he's under me. I'm on my knees over him and when he arches up from the seat, his pelvis hits mine.

I see stars. Billions of constellations swirling in the air between us when his body touches mine. All those nights I dreamt of waking up in his arms or kissing him goodnight flood through me. I lean down to kiss him, letting more of my weight press down on him.

Danny says my name – a half-garbled version of my name but he says it. Whispers it in my ear as he drags me closer to him. I'm so focused on hearing my name spoken in that strung out way that it barely registers when he shifts underneath me again. But there's a sudden, blinding pain in my rib that takes my breath instantly.

"What's wrong?" he asks when I pull back from him.

My breath comes out in a short gasp and I ache from the pain. I screw my eyes closed, breathing shallowly as I wait for the feeling to subside.

"Dash, hey… what's wrong?" Danny asks, shifting under me again. His knee brushes that same area and I quickly grab his leg.

"Stop… stop moving. Give me a… second," I say, screwing my eyes closed as the pain rolls through me again and again.

When I manage to blink an eye open, his are blown wide as he stares at me. Guilt washes over me at the thought that I scared him. I don't want to admit what's hurting, but he'll worry more if I pretend it's nothing. More than that… he'll definitely call bullshit.

"Sorry, it's just… my rib. I'm okay."

"What's wrong with it?" Danny asks, his voice quiet. "Did I hurt you?"

Oh god, he could never hurt me. It was an accident – he's always been so careful when I'm bruised.

"It's okay, I'll be fine," I say, letting out a breath before I find his hand with my own. I bring his hand up to my mouth, kissing his knuckles as I focus on breathing past the pain. "Where, uh… where were we?"

He gives me a look and his gaze darts down to my chest. "Seriously? After that – no. You're hurting."

"But I'm fine."

"I don't believe you." He pulls his hand from mine. "Can I see it? Your side."

"No." I practically spit the answer. "It's fine, I just… th-there are other marks too."

His expression softens a little at my confession. "I know. I saw some of them the night you got them."

Fuck, I almost forgot about that. I didn't show him the fucked up state of my back that night, but he probably caught a look at something while he was with me.

"So… you just gonna take me home then?" I ask.

Danny shrugs but it's obvious we're not doing this anymore. Damn it, I wanted to. This didn't feel like it did at Dale's during his New Year's Eve party. We were like any other horny couple at a party that night – eager to rut against the bedsheets like anyone else. But this – it felt different.

The outlook is our place. Something about this just felt right.

I want to ask him to just start over again but the moment's gone. The energy between us has shifted and even though my body's still adjusting to the space between us, I don't think my heart's going to. All I want to do is kiss him and hold him in my arms. I can't do that if he won't even let me touch him.

Danny lets out a breath and pushes away from me. "We should get going."

He climbs over the center console. I wait until he's settled before I get in the passenger seat. He turns the heat up in the car and buckles his seatbelt in place. He waits until I do the same before he puts his car into park and starts backing out.

I feel like I somehow screwed this thing up. Maybe I should have kept all my broken noises inside my chest. Maybe I'm the only one who will ever be able to handle them.

It's a long, slow drive back to Alex's apartment. I feel every ounce of that tension between us. It settles like thick dust over everything in his car. I almost want to cough it out of my lungs but I don't make a sound. I wish I could undo our time at the outlook. I didn't mean to ruin where we were headed.

Danny turns into the apartment complex's parking lot and coasts to a stop in front of the stairs. I want to invite him up but I know he's supposed to be with his parents soon. And I'm not sure that we have that much to talk about right now.

"Call me later, okay?" he asks, finally breaking the silence between us. He turns to give me a smile, reaching out to push my hair back from my forehead.

I unbuckle my seatbelt. "Yeah, sure. You… have a good dinner with your parents."

He shrugs. "Yeah, that's likely." He gives me a smile with the words and leans forward to kiss me goodbye.

I meet his kiss, fitting my hand on his waist. He smiles against my lips, making me smile, too. I actually groan a little when he pulls away and he smirks at the noise.

"Enjoying that a little too much, huh?" he asks, grinning when I duck my head. He nods toward the apartment. "Go, I'll watch until you're inside."

I get out of his car and go up to Alex's apartment. When I'm at the top of the stairs, I turn back to give him a wave goodbye. He returns the wave and eases his car forward, maneuvering around the parked cars in the lot.

I watch his car until it's gone. Until he's halfway down the road and out of my sight. I wish he didn't have to go. I wish we could have finished what we started at the outlook. But … it's not like we have to rush this.

The sun is already dipping below the clouds now. So I kick the snow from in front of the apartment and open the door.

I can smell dinner cooking as soon as I step inside. Someone's turned the heat up and there's soft music playing from somewhere. This warm feeling of home hits me square in the chest and it's almost impossible to breathe around. I've missed this. Having somewhere to go at the end of the night. Knowing someone's gonna be waiting up on me.

Kendra comes around the corner as I'm kicking my shoes off.

"Hey," I greet, nudging my shoes in line with hers. "Is Alex working tonight?"

She shakes her head, smiling brightly when I look up at her. "Nope. He's been with me all day." She hesitates for a second, glancing back toward the kitchen. "Alex, he's home."

I look where she is but he doesn't make an appearance. She waves me on to follow her and starts out of the foyer. I drop my backpack by my shoes and get my phone from it before I'm following behind her.

Alex is adding seasonings to something on a pan when I step into the kitchen – it looks like potatoes from where I'm standing. He glances over his shoulder at me. "Hey, your coach called me earlier."

My face flushes and I duck my head, nodding once. "Oh… yeah, he's… insisting on meeting you."

"I gathered that much from our conversation," he says, twisting the cap back on one of the seasonings before he turns to face me fully. "What's going on?"

"Nothing, he's just… concerned, I guess. Wants to make sure that I'm…" I don't know how to put it into words, so I go with a shrug.

Alex studies me in silence for a few seconds. He must get something from my expression though, because he nods without pressing for more.

"Okay. I told him I can stop by Friday – I'll be picking you up anyway," he says, continuing when I merely blink at him. "Your therapy appointment, remember?"

Shit… how could I forget?

"Oh, right."

He glances toward Kendra before pushing away from the counter. He turns back to the stove, opening the oven door.

Alex slides the pan into the oven and sets the timer sitting on the counter before he turns to look at me again. He's grinning now - he and Kendra both. They're practically bursting with smiles as they look at each other.

"We've got good news," he says, turning toward me again. "We got the house."

It takes me a split-second to understand what he's saying. But when it hits me, I'm grinning before I even finish the question. "Seriously? They took the underbid?"

He's practically beaming as he nods. "Yup. There's still a few steps left to do but if the inspector doesn't find anything too serious… then we'll be homeowners by the end of the month." He turns to Kendra with those words and they a share a look that has so much history in it.

She smiles, leaning over to kiss him on the cheek. He smiles, sliding his arm around her shoulders. He kisses the top of her head before he turns to look at me. "Hey, come here."

I step closer to him and he slides his arm around my shoulders too. He squeezes us both tightly, the two of us just under his chin as he holds us close.

"You two are the most important thing to me," he says, his voice hushed on the words. He turns a little to kiss my head before he's back to holding us close. "And I can't wait for us all to move into our home. I can't wait to make it ours and build our life there and… god, I love you both so much."

He sniffles on the last few words, turning to kiss Kendra's forehead. He breathes out slowly and I lean my head against his shoulder. He holds me tighter, mumbling words in Spanish that I don't understand.

I don't know what I ever did to deserve Alex in my life. I'm not sure that I'll ever do anything to deserve him. But I think he's the kind of person that doesn't need me to.

I think that no matter what happens, from here on out… he'll always love me. I'll always be a part of his life. Part of his family. And for the first time in a long time, that doesn't scare the hell out of me.

A/N:

Yooooo!

So… life's kind of crazy right now, huh? I hope you're all doing well and keeping as healthy as you can. This whole thing has felt really surreal to me. I hope it's okay, but I actually don't want to talk about it too much here. I want this fic to be a fun break from reality for all of you, so with that said, I'm gonna jump into a few rambly thoughts I have about this.

It's been like 3-ish months since I updated and honestly, I feel a little out of practice. I really do want to get back to monthly updates, but sadly, the writing mojo has not been strong with this one as of late. Who knows, maybe I'll kick my ass into high gear and whack out the ending in 2 days (lmao vague pipe dream if I ever heard one)

ANYWAY, moving on. Can we talk about how our boy, the soft, bruised quarterback, fiNALLY HAS A FOREVER HOME!? I'm dying, he deserves it. After all the shit I've put him through, I had to give it to him

What'd you think of the almost-scene at the outlook? If you thought waiting for them to kiss was torture, hooo boy just you wait (I'm mostly kidding. It's not another 60+ chapters for this – I wouldn't do that to you no matter how much I love slow burn lol)

I warred over how to handle the Blake stuff in this chapter. Dash's reactions to him in this chapter felt too much too fast and I've been going back and forth with myself on it. Honestly, I'm not 100% happy with the way I went with it, but I literally can't spend another second going over this chapter. I've taken things out and put them back and rewrote scenes entirely and I'm just so ready to be done with this one for now

I know that some of you were waiting for Dash to just postal and kick the shit out of Blake. But I don't see that ever happening – even if Dash's reactions were harsher in this chapter, I can't see him ever going after Blake without Blake instigating it. So… I'm sorry if you were expecting something more dramatic to happen with him, but this is what I originally planned and… I have to trust the outline I've been working from for years now

The title of this chapter comes from A World Alone by Lorde. I felt like it really fit, especially the scene when the boys were dancing!

So... you guys know me. I believe in being transparent with people. Which means I've gotta tell you all something and I don't want any of you thinking that I'm abandoning this story or anything like that. I'll always have a special place in my heart for this fic - however... I am working on a book that I'm really excited about, and that's taking up a good chunk of my writing time. The book is a fantasy/paranormal-ish book. And to put it as plainly as I can, it's basically Dash and Danny in a world that has werewolves and vampires and all that fun stuff. I think anyone that knows my work will be able to tell right off the bat that my main characters are based off Dash and Danny lol

Anyway, I said all that because basically = I don't know when the next update for this fic will happen. I've only written up to 83 for Stay so I need to buckle down and get some chapters done before I can start editing 81. Just know that future updates ARE coming, I just can't give a definitive answer as to WHEN they'll go up

That being said... I hope you've enjoyed this chapter and found it a nice break from whatever's going on in your life. Please drop me a comment below letting me know any of your thoughts about this chapter – I know a lot of people say this, but comments really do help during the writing process. So many of your comments, I look back on when I'm stuck in a scene or when I really want to find that motivation to starting writing on it again. Knowing that someone else is entertained by your work is really motivating during those long stretches where you feel like none of your writing makes any sense

Thanks for all of the comments you've left so far and you've stuck around to the end of this author's note, I hope you have a great day!

Next chapter you can expect more school shenanigans, a healthy dose of angst, and more of Kendra and Alex being the protective mama/papa bear duo that you all love lol

See you next update!