Beavis and Butt-head stood angrily on the sidewalk in front of the Maxi-Mart.

"I'm tired of never scoring," said Butt-head.

"Yeah, it's like we try everything and nothing ever works," said Beavis. "And frankly I'm sick of it!"

A man with greasy black hair, an oversized chin, and a red Hawaiian shirt walked by. "Hey there, boys, if you're having trouble scoring, I'm the man who can help you!"

"I think he's a homeowner, Beavis," said Butt-head.

"No, I mean I can help you score with chicks!" said the man. "The name's Quagmire. Glenn Quagmire. I've been on vacation in Highland for two days and I've already banged 500 chicks here! All right!"

"Whoa!" said Butt-head. "I don't even think I've spanked the monkey that many times since then."

"Well, then come aboard my Wanna-Bango! Oh!" said Quagmire, and the two boys walked into his Winnebago.

"So, you boys in high school?" asked Quagmire. "I'm not allowed near high schools anymore, but I got plenty of tail there for years."

"The chicks at Highland High suck," said Beavis.

"They're not into us because they're, like, thespians," said Butt-head.

"Sounds like you boys are looking for love in all the wrong places," said Quagmire. "Let's try this joint." He pulled up in front of Highland Gentlemen's Club and the boys got out.

"Whoa," said Butt-head, peering into the club where he could almost make out strippers on poles. "This place rules!"

"Yeah, it rules, it rules!" said Beavis.

An obese redneck in a cowboy hat blocked their view. "Welcome to Highland Gentlemen's Club, you boys 18?"

"Uh, no," said Butt-head.

"Yeah, we're 15," said Beavis.

"He said they're 18," said Quagmire, walking in front of Beavis and Butt-head.

"Well, why didn't you say so?" asked the redneck, and calmly stepped aside.