Death Rides a Dragon

Chapter 7

Big Trouble in Little Packages

Astrid was not sure why she was holding two fence posts steady for Hiccup, but she knew that look on his face very well; it was the look of invention. As soon as the young man had tied the tops of the post together in an A-frame, he made a second one exactly the same and then connected them with a thicker log. With his creation now able to stand on its own, Hiccup took the old saddle he had brought and placed it on the contraption, making it look like a headless horse.

"Where'd you get the saddle Babe?" Astrid asked.

"It was from Thornado, my dad's old Thunderdrum" Hiccup replied as he tapped a pointed leather punch on the stirrup strap.

Into the tiny hole he had made, Hiccup fitted the gem stud he had commandeered from Astrid earlier.

"There; it's all set" he said with pride.

"So what do we do now?" Astrid wondered.

"We go into the dragon stable behind us, and sit in the dark for a while" Hiccup replied.

"Err... Babe, you may think that's kind of romantic but I think it's rather kinky" Astrid admitted "I'm not saying I'm unwilling to try something new and different, but..."

"We need to watch the saddle while remaining unobserved" Hiccup corrected her.

"Oh... yes... sure... I was just... never mind."

Having secreted themselves away for their stakeout, there was nothing left to do but wait.

"Um... Astrid?" Hiccup whispered.

"Yes?"

"Just for the record... I too wouldn't mind trying something a little kinky someday" he admitted, unaware he had caused Astrid to turn bright red.

Later that afternoon, things were not going well at all for Hiccup. Astrid had dozed off about an hour ago and he was beginning to think his theory may have been completely wrong, when a small figure made its way towards the old Thunderdrum saddle.

"Astrid... Astrid wake up" Hiccup whispered as he shook her lightly.

"Hmm... wha?" she stirred.

"Shhh, look."

"What the... well I never would have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes" Astrid gasped "You know what this means, don't you?"

"Yes" Hiccup grinned "It means I can legitimately shut down SnotCo's latest venture, and simultaneously put Thorston and Thorston out of business."

"Well yeah, but it also means you owe me three coins" Astrid added.

"Oh... yes... I suppose it does."

'

'

As the sun set off the coast of Berk, the Vikings all gathered in the Great Hall for the evening feast. Almost everyone was there, even Snotlout who had been brought over face down on his stretcher, and was now trying to work out the most comfortable way for someone in his position to eat. Over in a dark corner, sitting all by themselves, Ruffnut and Tuffnut were going over their case notes while continuing to study the faces of the people around them.

"Nobody seems to be looking at Snotlout with murderous intent" Ruffnut noted.

"Maybe we should be looking for the person who looks the most innocent" Tuffnut pondered "The killer may be trying to trick us."

"Can you really call them a killer if they haven't killed anyone yet?" Ruffnut put forward.

"Attempted killer just doesn't sound the same" Tuffnut countered.

"Attempted murderer?" Ruffnut offered.

"Have you ever heard Gary's father say the word murder? He says it like murdah" Tuffnut chuckled to himself.

"There's gotta be a better way to find out who the culprit is" Ruffnut thought.

"Murrrda..." Tuffnut repeated to himself "Merduh... merdahhhh."

"LaVerne ; concentrate!" Ruffnut barked.

"I know what I'll do; I'll tell everyone here that I know who the killer is, and then we just have to see who suddenly gets excessively nervous" Tuffnut thumped the table with his fist.

"And what do we do if they try to kill you to shut you up?" Ruffnut pointed out.

"Ah... good point" Tuffnut agreed "I've got a better idea."

Picking up his metal plate and a fork, Tuffnut stood up on the table and banged them together.

"CAN I HAVE EVERYONES ATTENTION PLEASE?"

Each and every Viking stopped eating and all eyes turned towards Tuffnut.

"I just wanted everyone to know... that my Sister knows the identity of the person who tried to kill Snotlout" he said before sitting down again.

"Thanks a lot LaVerne, now they'll try to kill me" Ruffnut sighed.

Fortunately for the female twin, before any attempted homicide could be made against her, Hiccup entered from the other side of the room. He walked to the centre and just like Tuffnut had before, he called a halt to one of Berks favourite pastimes.

"Um... if everyone can stop eating for a moment..."

"Here we go again" Gobber sighed.

"I was wondering if anyone here could tell me if they have had any unexpected damage appear lately on their dragon equipment" Hiccup asked.

Unlike the last interruption, Hiccups enquiry cause the room to fall silent before most of the hands in the hall shot up.

"Good grief Eugene, it's a case of attempted mass murder of the Dragon Riders!" Tuffnut gasped "I never thought of that."

"Okay now keep your hand up if you have decorated your gear with Snotlouts gem studs" Hiccup continued.

It was hard to tell for sure, but it looked like nobody put their hand down.

"Ah... I can't say I'm surprised" Hiccup nodded "Well I think Astrid and I have found out why this has been happening."

Upon hearing her cue, Astrid came in behind Hiccup with something small and cute in her arms; and it wasn't a porcupine.

"Hey... is that... Smidvarg?" Ruffnut said as she shot to her feet.

"It seems that the bright gem studs have attracted the attention of the islands Night Terror community, particularly the males who take them and use them to decorate their nests in the hope of catching the eye of a female Night Terror. Of course these little guys don't have the dexterity to be able to unclip the studs, so they just bite halfway through the leather straps and then pick up the stud when it falls to the ground" Hiccup told the crowd.

"So you're telling me that the reason I've had to replace my dragon's stirrup straps twice in the last month is because of the gem studs I put on them?" Ivar called out.

A general murmur of annoyance spread out through the room as each Viking realised the reason for the extra work they have all had to do recently.

"Wait just a minute" Snotlout protested "How can you be sure it was a SnotCo product that was to blame, when you don't have any proof?"

"But we do have proof" Astrid grinned "We ourselves witnessed a Night Terror taking a gem stud from a dragon saddle, leaving an identical half cut to the ones on Snotlouts saddle straps. Later we checked on Olvor's dragon Boomer, and we found the same thing."

"Also when we followed the particular dragon that had stolen the item in question, we found the Night Terror nesting grounds to be a treasure trove of gem studs" Hiccup added.

"Why didn't you think to check any other saddles Eugene" Tuffnut asked his sister.

"I thought you were the great detective LaVerne" Ruffnut shot back.

Before Snotlout knew what was happening, he found himself surrounded by some very annoyed Berkians with only one thing on their minds; due compensation for losses incurred.

"Hold on everyone, SnotCo Inc has a definite no refunds policy" Snotlout insisted "And besides, I'm still badly injured if you hadn't noticed."

"Oh we've noticed Snotlout" Gobber smiled and nodded and if you don't want to risk even more injury, I suggest you come and work off your debt down at the forge when you're back on your feet."

"And in my fields" Ivar agreed.

Several other Vikings added to the previous suggestions and before Snotlout could protest any more, he found himself with future appointments on fishing boats, at logging camps, in stone quarries, and numerous other places of work; enough to keep him busy from now till Snoggletog.

"Thanks for your help Smidvarg" Astrid said as she gave the small dragon a large piece of roast boar she'd pilfered from an unattended plate.

After placing him outside, the happy Night Terror flew off back home, content in the knowledge that as usual helping the Dragon Riders had unexpected benefits. While back inside, Stoick the Vast had a few kind words for his son.

"Will you look at that; you've managed to take care of two problems at once" the Chief beamed "Now I'll get no more complaints about Snotlout's high prices, and no more complaints about the twins accusing people of attempted murder."

"Glad you happy Dad, but you know it's only a matter of time till the whole thing starts up again" Hiccup noted "Snotlout's bound to get another idea for getting rich quick, and the twins will always find some small mystery and blow it out of all proportions."

"Yes son I know, but tonight everything is looking up and I have you and Astrid to thank; I'm very proud of the both of you.

"Thanks Chief" Astrid came in from outside and slapped Stoick's back so hard, the huge man almost fell over forward.

"My goodness Lass, I swear you're getting stronger every day" Stoick said as he righted himself.

"I train hard" she nodded "Come on Hiccup, it's time for us to go back to my place."

"Uh... okay but why?" he asked with trepidation.

Looking about to check nobody could hear her, Astrid leant over and whispered seductively in Hiccups ear.

"Two reasons; a length of soft silk rope and a small tub of fresh yak butter."

"Lead on!" Hiccup agreed.

'

'

I'll leave the rest up to your imaginations ;D

I know I said earlier that this wasn't a good story for Snoggletog, but while writing I did come up with a Thorston and Thorston Christmas Special idea, so I guess that means they will be back.

Hope you enjoyed this story and I'll say farewell for now;
with love to all, from Marty.