"Harry!"

Harry Potter turned to see a red head hastily running towards him. "Wait up!" Lily Evans called. Of course, Harry had heard what happened. The whole school had heard what happened; apparently when the topic wasn't the Dark Lord's growing threat on the wizarding world, Hogwarts students still heavily relied on plain gossip. 'How vulgar' some James Potter fans deemed; 'He's a twat though' Lily supporters claimed; 'So he was a bad child, he's a good man now' Harry heard from a nearby conversation that morning; 'Just leave it between them' Alice and Frank insisted and refused to feed the gossip to everyone who dared to ask.

Harry considered himself lucky. He had heard the incident directly from his father's mouth yesterday, during their group chat by the fire. Although James had left the reason surrounding the argument rather vague, Harry could guess why. He chose not to dote on it too much. It was frankly an uncomfortable and awkward family situation. He remembered his brave moment of asking James about his crush, he felt he needed to clear himself in his father's eyes somehow, and was pleasantly surprised when James had smiled before answering. He didn't think he'd be glad about Frank's annoying pestering about his love life despite how much he enjoyed talking about Ginny. But he was. Apparently the word had already traveled to James' ears. The awkward family situation was handled.

"Hello Lily," He greeted her calmly. He decided not to ask about it unless she said something. Although he was dying to know. He was never a gossip really he hated it, it was just that this particular situation concerned his future birth. He didn't want to be the "Boy Who Sabotaged His Own Existence".

"Let's walk to Charms together," Lily grabbed his arm and pulled him forward before taking a quick hasty glance back. She seemed to be trying to escape from a group of girls behind them, most probably from their curious questions.

"How are you today?" He asked her. Lily gave a sarcastic laugh.

"Oh, great." He took a look at her. She seemed as red as her hair. Not a shy or flustered shade of red but the kind you get when you are just really suffocating. Her hair usually smooth hair had become almost Hermione-like fluffy which probably showed she was stressed out. Harry could see the group behind weren't the first group of people Lily had tried to avoid today.

"You know," she started angrily, "people just love to gossip. I mean, it's unhealthy. With all the things that are happening who cares if I—" She paused and gave him a side glance.

"Yes?"

"I slapped James Potter."

"I know."

"How?!"

"I don't know, everybody just knows."

"Everybody?"

"No, I mean—I guess, kind of, I don't know."

Lily gave a defeated sigh and pulled him aside. Specifically, away from the girls that were still following them. 'Is that James Potter though?' Harry heard one of the girls ask her friends as they passed by disappointedly. 'No it's just that copy of his.' Another responded.

"How rude." Lily clicked her tongue behind them. "Nevermind them" Harry replied hiding his smile. It wasn't much of a compliment but he'd enjoyed hearing it.

"Look" Lily spoke quietly, while checking their surroundings. "I feel terrible. I swear. I know it's awful, okay? But I can't just apologize,"

"Why not?"

"Because—" She paused for a second. "Because I kind of feel ashamed." She admitted finally. "Not just kind of, actually, I just feel ashamed."

"It's okay." Harry assured her. He wasn't much of an advice giver. Although he asked himself repeatedly 'What would Hermione say?' he still kind of failed in forming long sentences.

"No Harry look, I always try to do the right thing. In every situation. It's just how I feel comfortable. I have never and I mean ever intentionally done something I knew was wrong before. I don't know how to deal with this, really I don't."

Harry smiled. He had found that his mother had this beautiful innocence that him feel so much at the same time. He was so proud of her heart and so angry at her fate. He saw how much of a child she was. How much she still had to learn and how little of it she would actually get to learn. It made him want to run away, scream at the top of his lungs, break stuff and cry. He had thought being with his parents could be interesting. But lately all he could be interested in was how much it multiplied his pain.

"Just apologize," He told her shortly. He felt it was a summary of what Hermione would say, "It's okay; it's impossible to always do the right thing. Trust me," he told her, "I know this."

She seemed unsure. "And apologizing will make it okay?"

"Well, it's probably going to make it better than not apologizing." He replied, and then he added, "Also if you feel like you also deserve an apology—"

"I know I do." Lily said fiercely.

"Good. Then ask for it as well." Harry smiled at her. Maybe he was kind of getting good at giving advices.

"Right," Lily said once, looking away. She seemed to be in deep thought. She finally turned to look at him. "Right. I'll do both. Great. Thanks Harry," she smiled at him sweetly and grabbed his arm once again. "Let's go to class then."

And just as they continued to walk she said something else Harry would never forget.

"You know, you have such a sad smile."

Sirius Black did not like Harry Granger.

The black-haired young boy sat alone by the lake, fuming with anger in a very handsome manner. Was he secretly aware of the group of girls nearby, playing with the water loudly to attract his attention? Yes, he was. Was he going to give them some time from his day? No, maybe another day. He wasn't in the mood right now. He was busy feeling angry.

It had been hard to ditch Wormtail today; even after seven years that boy was still managing to get clingier by day. Sirius loved his friend, for sure but his lack of confidence bored him lately. He managed to leave him with Moony in the library and head out alone. Remus had a way of understanding when he needed time on his own.

His partner in crime on the other hand, was rather daft.

"You are too quick to judge people." James had told him today. Anger rose in his chest once more. He skipped a rock on the lake. The girls nearby giggled. He didn't look their way.

He spent one fucking evening in detention, and all at once the Marauders liked Granger? That arrogant weird little boy, who hadn't even appreciated their help the other day?

It wasn't because of his lack of appreciation that made Sirius dislike him though. That just made him annoyed. He disliked Granger because that boy was just too damn suspicious. Who would appear in Hogwarts, in his seventh year, with a half assed explanation? Plus, he woke up every morning pretending to sleep, making no noise. Was he trying to eavesdrop on their conversation or was he just being creepy? Sirius often caught him during the day, looking at the Marauders with a weird expression on his face. And not just looking but watching. Mostly watching James. But Prongs had decided, suddenly, that Granger was "not so bad".

"He's not into Lily." He had said happily. Of course, for James everything began and finished with that fiery red-head.

"Who cares about Lily?!" He had exclaimed desperately, to which James had been thoroughly offended.

"I do."

And no matter how much Sirius had tried to explain he didn't mean anything bad, James had shut him off.

"Look you need to calm down about Granger, Padfoot." He'd said before excusing some Head Boy duties to leave.

"Sirius!" One of the girls by the lake finally called impatiently, "Come play with us," she said with a naughty tinge in her voice. Sirius sighed. Apparently since he'd been caught with Claire, he seemed easier to approach for ladies.

"Not today, love." He replied to the girl and turned to leave. The girls giggled even harder. He gloomily walked back inside.

He just couldn't believe he'd argued with his best friend because of that odd boy.

It was a boring circle of conversation.

Boring people making small plans… Regulus couldn't believe most of these people were to be Death Eaters in nearly shorter than a year. Rookwood, for example, was simpler than a piece of wood. At least a wood was good to nature, somehow.

His dark mark already burned brightly on his wrist.

Sirius had left that night. They never had a blind hope that he would eventually return. They knew he would somehow make it alone. His mother didn't wait a night to blast Sirius off the family tree. She was betrayed. They were betrayed. They always knew they would be betrayed eventually. So what was the point of feeling betrayed if he always knew the inevitableness of his abandonment? Because Sirius was his brother? Because blood wasn't supposed to work that way? But that wasn't true. Regulus had seen with his own eyes that night that his mother's view on blood was a handicapped view.

But she hadn't seen it.

The morning after Sirius left, her cold eyes had turned to him. Her younger son. Her little baby. Her Regulus would never ever disappoint her.

"Honor our family."

And he had wanted to. He had been eager to do so. He had tried his best to impress young Lucius Malfoy, a rising Death Eater, the Dark Lord's newest star. If Lucius Malfoy liked him, his mother assured that he would be such an honorable member of the Dark Lord's followers and such a pride to their family. His father had just nodded. A passive man, blindly in love with his wife and her devotion to his last name. Walburga Black's words were laws in Grimmauld Place.

But that was before. Not that long ago maybe but before. His mind had blurred tremendously since he received his mission from the Dark Lord. How weird it was that confusion and clarity could be the same thing, at times.

Suddenly the change of topic sparked his interest.

"That new odd boy," Rookwood spat, "we need more information on him."

"What for?" Snaped wheezed, "Just a worthless mudblood it seems."

"Are you a fool? He is constantly in Dumbledore's office!"

A few other Slytherins in their circle agreed. Regulus knew how eager they were to receive a mission from the older boy. And later he would put in a good word to the Dark Lord and they too would become a part of the winning side. Regulus spoke quickly.

"I'll watch him."

Rookwood looked at him, arrogantly. Snape looked at him, thoughtful. Snape was intelligent. He often undersold himself around Rookwood but Regulus knew that wasn't because of any lack of confidence. It was just strategy. Regulus was aware that Snape was observant of him. And he was more aware of some changes than Rookwood was.

"Ah, Little Regululs wants a mission." Rookwood seemed at least a little bit pleased that Regulus, who had already been approached by the Dark Lord, was still asking his permissions for missions in Hogwarts. He could see that it gave Rookwood a sense of greatness. That's how simple he really was.

"Yes, I do." He made sure to sound young and eager. "Come on, Rookwood, give me a chance."

It wasn't because he needed to prove himself to daft Rookwood. But Harry Granger was weird. And Regulus needed a way out. If Harry Granger's odd, sudden arrival, his undeniable closeness to Dumbledore, led to something that could provide him a safe exit, then Regulus needed to be the first one aware of this. It was risky, and possibly led to nothing but he had to at least try.

Rookwood smirked. He wanted to taunt him but didn't want to let the others know that the Dark Lord had already contacted Regulus.

"You will report to me every evening."

"Yes."

Snape raised his eyebrow. Rookwoods smirk widened.

"Very well, keep an eye on Granger."

How to live in a place where hope is dimmed, with every passing day? How to live in a place where after a night filled with death, the streets were filled with celebrations? A good outcome does not devalue the lives that were lost. But so many can't see that. How to live in a place where being an "intellectual" is used as an insult? Being educated is seen as being elite? If I walk out the streets tomorrow, will I know that the man standing next to me is not willing to kill me just because I am not religious?

How to live in a place where you have no voice anymore? How to make plans for the future while you fear life? I have defended my rights, and I have defended the rights of those who have a different life style than me, yet I see now that half of the population would be so glad to have me gone, even dead.

How to hope for unity when you just don't understand?

Sorry about this little rant. But time is passing by and world is not getting lighter. I am so sad. So dear reader, I sincerely hope wherever you are in the world, you are having a light, happy day. Because the world is lost if those days are completely gone.

Lots of Love to all,

Necesisstas