I've had a rough and chaotic week. My aunts mother died on 7/15, and on that exact same day my 5S got crushed on a highway…and I'm moving…and I feel very shitty. Because of those two accidents, I haven't been feeling up to writing.

Not to mention, I keep looking into so many story ideas of mine that it's ridiculous. I have exactly 37 other Naruto story ideas, excluding the originals and other fanfictions that aren't Naruto. I'm only paying attention to like, 10 other fanfics, 2 or 3 being successful.

Anyways, this is basically the sequel to The Adversary; I deleted it along with ODS: Inane for a very good reason. It saddened me to get rid of my most popular story, but I've lost it.

WARNINGS: Violence, blood, character death, language, yaoi (KakaObiKaka), fluffy moments, angst moments, TT, AU, dark!demon!anti-hero!powerful!poison-master!medic!fūinjutsu!Naruto, and half-demon!Kakashi.

Tsunade took Naruto in as an apprentice, Sakura going to Jiraiya for taijutsu and ninjutsu training and Sasuke going to Orochimaru. Still. Naruto is a demon from hell, but he is still Naruto; he was still born from Minato and Kushina (who are human). Only the fact that he came into direct contact with the Shinigami made him into a demon.

Older!Kakashi alias: "Katashi" (meaning: firmness)

Older!Obito alias: "Izo" (meaning: ice; iron)

Demon!Naruto alias: "Akki" (meaning: demon)

Original title: Noxious & Innocuous

Rated: M (for language, violence/blood & sexual references)

Original summary: "Noxious"…it explained him so well, but then "innocuous" would explain him just as much. (He had blonde hair, once upon a time. But then it turned black and red from all of his mistakes, ranging from killing his own mother to starting the Fourth War—never again, and that was final.)

Four main genres: Adventure/Action, Hurt/Comfort, Supernatural & Drama

Characters (that show up the most, it's more than four): Naruto U., Obito U., Kakashi H., Sasuke U., Sakura H., Minato N., Kushina U. Sarada U., (two) OCs & Rin.

Pairings: KakaObiKaka, SasuSaku, & MinaKushi

Recommended songs: Little Lion Man & Lovers' Eyes by Mumford & Sons

Overall original chapter word count: 5.6k~ (that beat my record by 900 words :D)

Enjoy :p

My immortal: Fears, tears and regrets—a bloody knife.

It's his fault.

Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Haruno Sakura, Hatake Uchiha Obito and Hatake Uchiha Kakashi weren't sure how or what happened; they went about their normal routine, and at the end of the day, they went to bed. The day was quiet—normal and not in any way eligible to be disturbed.

And then the village alarm rang.

All four woke up in an instant, both on opposing ends of the village as they quickly hurried to get dressed and ready for the sudden invasion. They easily found themselves at the Rokudaime's disposal—Hyūga Hinata. After Uzumaki Naruto left and was declared a missing-nin (for unknown reasons; the action was extremely surprising), she became more resolute.

Gai lost his arms in the war, so he couldn't be a ninja—let alone Hokage—and Kakashi declined the position when it was offered; he was "too old", and simply didn't fit the job. Obito (surprisingly enough) didn't take it either, and kept his reasons to himself.

Hinata nodded to all of the ninja. "All civilians are being evacuated," she announced, "and the intruder is unknown. They have been located in the eastern part of Konoha. Everybody is to be on the defensive side, and everybody will drive him out. Everyone but Sakura, Sasuke, Kakashi and Obito are dismissed!"

Said shinobi stayed, and the rest took their leave. Hinata slowly walked up to them, sighing heavily. Sakura frowned, "What's wrong?"

"I went to go and see who it was at first," Hinata said. "He specifically wanted you four to go see him. He's in the southern district."

"Why'd you lie, then?" Obito asked.

Her eyes narrowed. "He's a demon from Hell, like Naruto," she replied, the name rolling off her tongue like dirt. "He is not to be taken lightly. I don't know the art of demon slaying, only Kakashi does. Nobody does nowadays. Which is why I'm trusting you guys. Besides, he put a Kage Bushin in the east, so my bluff is backed up."

Sasuke spoke up for the first time since he arrived. He tipped his head. "Why all four of us?"

Hinata shook her head. "Beats me," she stated. Her expression hardened. "This is an S-ranked mission I am assigning to you four as your Hokage. Obito, you are team captain. Kakashi, you are to subdue and capture this self-proclaimed demon of Hell. Sasuke, Sakura, you two will protect Konoha and Kakashi—make sure you don't fail. Am I understood?"

"Yes ma'am!" they said in unison.

"You are dismissed. Good luck."

The four, then, took their leave, eagerly jumping onto the roofs. Obito looked at the four of them. "Use the academy's standard triangle formation," he ordered. "Kakashi will be in the middle. Sakura to the far back left, and Sasuke in the front. Make sure Kakashi gets to charge up his energy to capture the demon. Defensive jutsu only, until I give my word."

"Right," Sakura said. "Usual protocol?"

The eldest Uchiha shook his head. "No," he replied. "We're dealing with an actual demon of Hell. They don't joke around, remember that. This one most likely has a tail like usual. If we ever go on the offensive, target the tail. If they use their voodoo art or whatever, keep a safe distance. Kakashi, that includes you. I don't care if you know the bullshit of slaying, you are still human."

The silver haired jōnin looked like he was going to pout, but his face snapped into a face of seriousness as he spotted a cloaked man. "There he is," he said.

The four quickly shifted into position, landing in a main street a few feet away from their opponent. Kakashi kneeled down, putting his hands out in front of his chest and started preparing a chain spell that would injure and incapacitate any demon, regardless of size. It took up a lot of concentration and will power, as well as physical and mental energy, but it was always well worth it in the end.

He heard the clang of metal and chakra as the trio fought the self-proclaimed demon charged them. But he ignored it, feeling slightly nostalgic. The last time he used the chain spell was when Naruto attacked and nearly killed Obito when the former was on the verge of defecting. Barely even three days later did that event happen.

But in the time span before, NAruto became distant and depressed. Kakashi had went to another demon of Hell, and asked what was happening. Her answer was kind of distant, vague even, but he got the answer. It was simply out of self-blame and self-hate.

Since demons are practically the terrible devil of the human side, they'll easily plummet into depressing conditions, and as such, will become either suicidal and self-harm, or drown in self-hate while avoiding everyone (which leads to suicide); sometimes both.

Kakashi drew in a shaky breath, turning his gaze towards the cloaked demon. His movements were swift and graceful, and all of his attention was turned towards Obito. The silver haired Hatake pursued his lips before shouting. "Scatter!"

Without hesitation, the trio jumped up onto the rooftops. Kakashi didn't waste any time. He barely waited. The moment their feet lifted off the ground, he slapped his hands on the ground, the ball of light he was developing getting shoved into the ground and creating a crack in the ground. Barely a second later, a chain with a very sharp end shot up from the ground by the demons left foot, slashing diagonally from his left thigh to the right crook of his neck. Blood sprayed from the wound, dripping on the ground and easily making a pool of crimson.

The demon coughed up blood, said liquid falling out from underneath the eternal shadow his hood was casting. He put his arm over the wound, the dark cloth already soaked.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes, and pulsed energy. Ten separate chains shot out on the ground, four wrapping around his limbs, one around his torso and another around his neck. The other six wrapped around his knees, wrists and elbow joints, yanking him down on his stomach, pinning him and making the wound on his person hurt and worsen even further. He stood up, stumbling a little, but Obito caught him before he could actually fall.

The four made their way towards the intruder, whose breathing was wet and ragged. Blood was quickly forming a pool underneath him.

Sakura looked at Kakashi with a disgusted look. "Don't you think you went a little extreme?" she asked.

Kakashi shook his head. "No…you have to remember that demons, no matter how human they look or act, are not ones to hesitate and screw around. If I went any easier, he would've jumped to kill any of you three," he pointed out. He narrowed his eyes. "Besides, he's already heal…" His voice trailed off when he felt something rise in his throat. He put his free hand over his mouth, falling to his knees and coughing nonstop.

The trapped demon looked at him, and Kakashi caught sight of his face. He had a green rhombus on his forehead, dark bruised circles under his eyes, and blood was falling from his mouth. He had fair skin, blue eyes, black hair with red streaks and tips, and whisker marks scarred—

He froze, his eyes widening in pure dismay. He knew that face. It was the face of Uzumaki Namikaze Naruto. His student, Obito's savior, Sasuke's retriever, Sakura's motivation, Hinata's secret pride, Sarada's godfather, the former heir to the Uzumaki Clan, the older brother to his siblings (Minato and Kushina had gotten rather busy before Kushina died), Minato and Kushina's eldest son, the Kyūbi's former jinchūriki, and the cause of the Fourth War.

"Kakashi!"

Obito's desperate and loud shout in his ear made him flinch and snap back to reality. The eternal shadow was back over Naruto's face, and the Uzumaki was panting in a struggle for breath, though he stopped bleeding.

"What the hell was that?" Sasuke snapped.

The silver haired jōnin shook his head, rubbing his eyes as a headache rose.

Obito turned his glare towards Naruto. "What did you do to him?"

He laughed weakly and darkly, his voice strained and cracking with exhaustion and pain from the wound. "I…I did n-no-thing…" he choked out, the words barely escaping due to the chains around his neck tightening. "He-he's l-likely…dying…"

"What do you mean 'he's dying'?!" the elder Uchiha shouted.

"D-demon…sl-slaying will…d-do that…" he murmured. He coughed, grunting as he ripped his arm from the chains, shattering them and making Kakashi scream.

Obito's eyes widened as realization dawned on his face. "Don't—"

Sakura raised her fist and Sasuke palmed a kunai, but the three were thrown away by the cloaked Uzumaki's demon spell, pressing them against the wall and blinding as well as deafening them temporarily. Kakashi was left on his knees, sweat falling down his temple and face. Naruto raised a fingerless gloved hand that was soaked in blood. He put his thumb to Kakashi's right temple, drawing his thumb across the mans face and eyelids all the way to his left temple, his hand dropping limply when he finished.

Realization made Kakashi's eyes widen, not caring if the blood on his eyelids got into his eyes. "Y-you're dying. You're not naturally healing, are you?" he asked fearfully.

"Not—not…fa-st e-enough…" he croaked out, not making eye contact. He kept his cheek on the ground, his breath still ragged and wet. "I've just performed a seal—" He coughed harshly, "…on you…it'll activate in three days time. Do not tell dad…or anybody, for that matter…"

The Hatake stared, before he fell forward, knocking out. The blood soaked into his skin, and disappeared with a faint red glow. A bright red streak was in his hair a moment later.

Naruto smiled bitterly, raising his arm and weakly closing up his wound with Shōsen Jutsu (it'll barely scab over, but it's better than bleeding out and dying). And while his wound was no longer life threatening, he was still exhausted—he was suffering from blood loss, and was starting to feel extremely dizzy and had a hard time breathing. He was only basing off what he saw, but he predicted that he lost at least two fifths—forty percent—of his blood, possibly more.

He finally let go of Sasuke, Sakura and Obito, letting them drop and gain their senses back. Obito only took a second to recover, though; he sprinted to Kakashi's side, only some tension leaving when he felt his spouses pulse. He glared at Naruto. "'The hell did you do?"

"He…j-just knocked out," the Uzumaki croaked, wheezing and coughing.

Sasuke stepped up by his head, kneeling down and pulling his hood off. Everybody was quick to stare in shock, though Sasuke would've ranked first place if it was a competition. His eyes were wide, he was frozen and his jaw slacked.

"Why so surprised…?" Naruto asked weakly. He chuckled darkly, closing his eyes with a weak toothy grin that looked more like he was clenching his teeth.

Sasuke sputtered before regaining his posture. He looked grim. "I still see the thirteen year old rival I had when I look at you," he murmured. The chains suddenly crumpled into rust as if what Sasuke said was its cue to leave, disappearing into smoke and letting the Uzumaki's body become more relaxed.

Naruto chuckled weakly again and promptly blacked out, the Uchiha's words being the last thing he heard.

"…bind a demon?"

Kakashi flinched, his eyes snapping open as he shot up. He was alarmed, staring at the elderly Minato like he was going to dye his hair bright magenta at a whim (Minato doesn't particularly like the magenta). Chaining a demon down is a terrible idea! You'll die very easily. Why do you think all of the capturing spells injure or incapacitate the targeted demon before binding them?!

The blonde blinked. His hand shot out, pushing Kakashi back onto the hospital bed. "Well, you're awake. Welcome back to the world of the living," the forty-six year old shinobi said flatly. "I know this may be on a short note, but do you know chain down a demon?"

Kakashi looked at his sensei from his elevated hospital bed like he was too stupid to die. "Sensei, there's a reason as to why all of the demon slaying capturing spells injure the demon before actually binding them," he pointed out. "Incapacitation is vital when pinning them down. But if you give them enough space and bribe them with something, then interrogating them will become like a conversation."

The Namikaze nodded. "Thanks…we're trying to get answers out of Naruto."

"What for?"

"You fell into a small and short, but unpredictable forty-two hour coma," Minato explained. "You've been having strange symptoms—high brain activity, trouble breathing, and so forth. You aren't sick, or have anything even medically wrong with you. So we're suspecting it has something to do with your half-demon status."

Kakashi simply nodded slowly.

"Anyways, I'm off. Got a demon son to beat some sense into…" he grumbled, getting out of his chair and walking out of the hospital room. He teleported away, landing right next to Ayame (she became Hinata's secretary a few months before Naruto defected, Teuchi and his grandson continuing the ramen business).

She squeaked, dropping her pen and nearly falling out of her chair. "Minato-sama!" she said chidingly. "Don't do that! I'm gonna die from a heart attack a century too early!"

The blonde smiled in amusement. "I'm sorry. Is Hinata-dono in?" he asked.

"Yes," she responded, straightening up. "She just called in Ibiki and that kid who wants to be his student…uh, what was her name…?"

"Was Sarutobi Mirai?" he tried. "Red eyes, short black curly hair?"

"Yes! Her. Yeah. She and him are in there right now," Ayame said. She waved her hand on a 'scoot away now' manner. "You may go."

Minato nodded his farewell, and stepped into the hallway towards office door. He arrived, opening the door with a smile of greeting. He glanced at Ibiki and Mirai—who was only six. He waved. "Hello. Kakashi told me a strategy."

Hinata blinked, craning her neck to look at him. She glanced down at Mirai, and smiled her motherly smile. "You need to get going, Mirai-chan. Your mother must be expecting you pretty soon."

The child pouted, but bowed respectfully. She said goodbye to the two, waving and racing past Minato out the door.

The Namikaze joined Ibiki's side, nodding his hello. He glanced at Hinata. "We need to move Naruto to the Hokage's cell. It's extremely roomy in there, and we'll likely need ramen. So prepare your wallet."

She frowned. "Why would we give him the freedom of movement?"

"Kakashi said that trapping and chaining down a demon without being incapacitated isn't a very good idea," Minato explained. "So we have to give him a place where he can move freely, but can't escape, and we'll likely need to bribe him. And once again, Kakashi is the demon professional here. It's best if we listen. Or at least try."

The Hyūga sighed. "Fine. Ibiki, can you please discharge Naruto? Tell the head doctors that they are direct orders from me, and then take him to the Hokage's cell."

The interrogator nodded, turning and walking away.

"…Minato," she said wearily. "Do you think he's the cause of Kakashi's…condition?"

Her only response was a shrug, but the hope that it wasn't his fault was evident in his bright blue eyes that seemed to dull with distress and worry over the years.

Naruto abruptly shot up when water was dumped on his face. He wiped his face clean, shaking his hands through his hair and making it wilder than usual. He glared up at Ibiki (it's not a very good idea to wake him up as such), a childish pout appearing on his face when he realized who was with him—Hinata, Minato and Ibiki. "What was that for?" he whined. His tail flicked underneath his cloak.

"For not waking up," Ibiki shot back. He crossed his arms, trying to look intimidating. "Now, we have questions. Lots of questions. And you will answer them all."

"Hmm." He absently sat up and brushed himself free of dust, looking around. He was in a relatively dark, tall room with thick smoothed over stone pillars. He blinked. "Why am I in the Hokage's cell?"

"Because if we put you anywhere else, you'd very likely be grumping instead of answering," Minato spoke up, obviously irked. "What are you willing to answer?"

"Depends. What kind of questions will you be asking?"

"We want to know of Kakashi's condition," Hinata stated with authority. "It's a complete mystery to us, so we were wondering if you knew anything."

"…And what will I get in turn?"

"Fifteen bowls of miso ramen," she said. "And with an additional, reasonable request."

"Fine," Naruto agreed easily. "How long were we out?"

"We?" Ibiki asked skeptically.

"Kakashi and I," the dark haired demon replied simply.

"A little over a day and a half," Minato informed, tossing eight bags of ramen towards his son, all easily caught. Naruto crouched down, putting the bags down. He pulled out a bowl, and started eating the ramen. "He's been having odd, unfitting symptoms. Like troubles breathing, high brain activity…and I haven't told him this, but his heart is failing."

"Hmm…anything else?" Naruto asked absently as he unsurprisingly moved onto his second bowl of ramen.

"Not really. Do you know what it is?"

"Odd unfitting symptoms…hm, do they involve coughing up blood, high fever, difficult breathing to the point of where he needs a tube stuck down his throat and random muscle spasms?" Naruto asked.

"Everything but the severity of respiratory," the oldest Namikaze answered. "Is it bad?"

"No," he said, pulling out a fifth bowl of ramen. "Fatal."

Minato's eyes widened. "What? What's causing it?"

Naruto sighed, closing his eyes. He swallowed the remaining ramen in the bowl, and put said empty bowl down. He stood, cracking his neck and knuckles. His tail poked out from underneath his cloak, flicking irritably. He sighed again, opening his eyes and pointing a finger a Minato. "Moron," he simply said.

The Namikaze blinked dumbly.

"Don't give me that look," he snapped. "Moron."

"What makes him a moron?" Ibiki questioned.

"Demon slaying is nothing fuck around with. You can't get away from it," Naruto explained, keeping his gaze locked with Minato. "To put it simply, using the art of demon slaying and or magic is fatal. You won't die the first time you use it, but you'll sure as hell die in your later years with those symptoms. Have you ever heard of a demon dying of old age—or a disease, possibly? Rarely. Life expectancy for us demons is twenty to thirty-five years. Kakashi is lucky to live up to thirty-nine because he doesn't use it as often, but still, he's dying close to the expectancy."

"So…you're dying…?" Hinata asked, her voice cracking slightly. She silently berated herself for sounding so weak.

"Yes," Naruto replied bluntly and stoically. The three flinched at how flat and apathetic he sounded towards the concept of him dying. "I am. Fainted from lack of oxygen about a week ago, so I honestly don't expect to live much longer. Another four or so years, maybe a little bit more. Just depends on how much of the arts' spells I use."

Minato's eyes widened. "Is there seriously no cure?"

"Cure?" He laughed bitterly, crouching back down and continuing onto his next bowl of ramen, speaking around the noodles and soup he practically breathed in. "If there was a fucking cure, more than half of the world would be swarming with a bunch of goddamned demons and half-demons. Scum and all, dattebayo. You, dad, would probably be killed by a demon by now, and so would Hinata, Obito, Sakura, probably Sasuke…Kakashi would survive through the whole ordeal, and a little under a fifth of Konoha will have pure humans."

Silence dawned on the group, each of the three individuals soaking in what Naruto had said while the latter breathed in the other eight bowls. He sighed a third time, putting his left hand on his knee and started drawing on the dirt ground.

"When a demon is born, he or she carries the risk of dying from the sheer power of our energy," Naruto murmured. "So what I said is an exaggeration, dattebayo. Morons."

Some tension left.

"But! Even if it happens," he continued, getting rid of the doodle and absentmindedly starting over again, "demons will drop dead left and right. Whole forests would become graveyards and whatnot…lots of grieving. Y'know? Anyways, there is a fūinjutsu that can stall it for another few decades, but there is a consequence…hmm…well, I guess you could call it a consequence…oh. I almost forgot. Did I mention that the seal is already on Kakashi? It's supposed to active in about a day."

"Is it bad?" Hinata asked calmly, though the flinch gave away her uneasiness. "Will it kill him?"

"I have no reason to kill anybody," Naruto stated, scanning the fūinjutsu kanji he drew to represent to the trio. He blinked when he realized another thing. "Ohhh…"

"What?" Ibiki snapped, cracking his knuckles. "Did'ja fuck something up?"

"Miscalculation on the timing," Naruto said sheepishly. "Supposed to be three days, but I made it two. Huh. Goes off in exactly six hours."

Minato's eyes scanned the seal before widening dramatically. He looked at his son with a sharp and questioning gaze. "What the hell are you trying? Half of this I don't even recognize," he snapped.

"It's fūinjutsu fused with demonic arts," Naruto pointed out with a small devilish smile. "Of course you wouldn't recognize it. 'Sides, it's encrypted. Has to be."

"We're done here," Hinata said abruptly and suddenly. Ibiki nodded, picked up the bowls of ramen and bags, and trailed after the Rokudaime as she walked away

"Are you okay with me staying behind?" Minato asked, not following. "I want to talk to him for a bit longer."

"I'm perfectly fine with that. Just escort him to Kakashi when you're finished, and make sure he makes no trouble," Hinata replied. She turned her steely gaze to the back of his head. "But do not fight. I am dead serious."

The Namikaze simply nodded, ignoring the click of the iron and fūinjutsu covered door as the other two left. Minato lost his posture quickly, suddenly looking older than what his age actually was. Naruto's shoulders sagged as well. He rested his chin on his knees and hands, staring down at the scribbled seal. His saggy bangs covered his face, shadowing his eyes greatly. He was chewing his thumbnail, a habit he developed when he was frustrated or feeling greatly conflicted.

But it was a habit long abandoned; the Uzumaki got rid of it when he was ten.

Minato sighed, crouching down to his sons level. He craned his neck to look under Naruto's red and black bangs, his face softening. He smiled. "And what's gotten you so frustrated and conflicted?"

He stopped chewing on his thumbnail, but he didn't make eye contact. Nor did he speak. Not for quite a few moments. But Minato still kept his smile, never faltering, and his son gave in with a heavy sigh. "I'm having second thoughts," he whispered hoarsely. "The seal…erases everything but the people who have it. But I've been planning this ever since mom died…"

Minato's smile finally fell, feeling relief wash over him. Naruto was still Naruto—his Naruto, the son he raised and the son he and Kushina knew. Not the demonic Naruto; not the one who killed and hurt people, and drowned in self hate and blame. He put his hand on his hair, fingers gently and soothingly brushing through the locks.

He kissed Naruto's crown, rest his chin there and pulling the twenty-two year old into a hug. "And why would you want to erase everything?" he asked. "Your brothers and sister, all the friends you've made—all the people and demons you've changed…the memories of your milestones and accomplishments…why would you want to get rid of it all? Is it that painful?"

Naruto gripped his fathers haori, his jaw clenching as tears started streaming down his face, his shoulder shaking as he let go of his position, hunching over while he was in Minato's arms, face buried in his chest. Minato shifted, sitting on his knees as well.

"Y-yes…" Naruto responded, the sadness and tears evident in his shaking voice.

Minato frowned, his arms tightening along with Naruto's death grip. "I'm sorry…I didn't know…" he murmured. He started stroking the back of his sons neck, hoping to at least soothe him.

"Everywhere I look…" he sobbed, starting a rant, "everywhere…I-I see my mistakes. I'm the reason why everything has happened…I practically killed mom…and I'm the reason why Fubuki is dead! The war…the Akatsuki killing Ero-Sennin and baa-chan…all of it, 'ttebayo! I'm the reason why Kakashi is dying for getting him into demonic arts…it's my fault Obito is still in pain…all of it! My fault…"

For once in a long time, the former Hokage felt dumbfounded. He hadn't realized how much pain Naruto had been in, how much he blamed himself for all the deaths. Fubuki was his younger sister—his baby sister, born when he was six. She died in the Suna-Oto attack, because Orochimaru had used her as a scape goat to get away from a pissed off demonized Uzumaki Naruto, threatening to decapitate her. He ended up killing her anyways (sliced her throat; she was only seven, too).

And then Jiraiya and Tsunade went out to kill Pain. They were successful, but Kuro Zetsu just so happened to be there. He attached himself to Jiraiya, killed Tsunade and then made Jiraiya kill himself.

The Fourth War…was something. Naruto had went out to search for the remaining members of Akatsuki ("Uchiha Madara", Zetsu, Team Taka, and Kisame), and in the process, made Kirigakure hostile. Kiri went to Iwa, and the two gained up on Konoha. Suna went to help out Konoha, and Kumo stayed neutral. It ended with an obliterated Kiri, and Iwa was forced to relocate their village.

Even now they were still flimsy, short of citizens and shinobi and low on money.

Team Taka left, Kisame died fighting Minato and Zetsu disappeared. Obito got stuck in a cave with Naruto for six weeks, the latter nearly dying from starvation and dehydration (his status as a demon saved him) and the former nearly killing him. When they were found, Obito returned to Konoha because Naruto had said something to him that completely changed the bastard, and said bastard redeemed himself in ANBU for a year, doing a streak of S-ranked missions until he was discharged.

Naruto being the cause of Kushina's death rattled Minato to the core—and his core was covered in platinum.

Nobody still had no idea what happened, but Kushina had been impaled in the heart once after birthing the nine year old Uzumaki-Namikaze Twins, Kazuhiko and Kazuhito.

"My fault…" Naruto's whisper ended Minato's muse.

"It's not your fault," he assured, petting Naruto's hair, "because if it was, then you'd be in jail for life for treason." He kissed Naruto's crown again, smiling, even though the darker haired Uzumaki couldn't see it, "You're so gentle and selfless, that it makes you cruel and selfish. You're being selfish by blaming yourself, dying and not letting us help you; hogging all the pain, giving yourself sorrow. You're being cruel by blaming yourself—hating yourself, because of something that you didn't do. It hurts me to hear you so broken, y'know…hurts a lot.

"I'm your father, and fathers are meant to be there for there sons and daughters. We're meant to be your help…and if we fail and you crumble, we'll be there for you, to listen to your troubles, and to try and become the shoulder you can cry on again."

Naruto nuzzled his face further into Minato's chest, sobbing even harder for many long minutes as he soaked in the former Yondaime's words, having the breakdown he needed since he became a genin.

"…Are you still going to use that seal?" Minato asked quietly, breaking the calming silence when Naruto finished crying.

The younger Namikaze nodded. "Y-yes…" he murmured, rubbing his damp eyes and face. "I am. But I'm bringing four extra passengers."

"And who will they be?"

"You, Sarada, Kazuhiko and Kazuhito."

Naruto's blood was smeared onto the two nine year olds eyes and temples, making them cringe and whine complaints. "Don't touch it," Naruto ordered sternly, taking his hands off of them quickly like they were a thin ice sculpture. "I know it's annoying, but it's only temporary."

Kazuhiko—the mini Minato (with a boisterous attitude, light blue eyes and ridiculously messy red hair)—opened his eyes, crossing his arms and pouting up at his elder brother. "Why?" he whined. "It feels sticky and annoying! Ew!"

Kazuhito—the mini Kushina (but he was really quiet and smart; straight, long haired red head with bright blue eyes and fair skin)—smiled in amusement, giggling. He opened his eyes as well, looking up at Naruto curiously. "Onii-chan, why're we doing this?" he asked.

"Hmm, it's a surprise," he replied simply, turning to Sakura, Sarada and Sasuke. He smeared the blood onto Sasuke's eyes first, going for Sakura and then Sarada, Obito following and Minato was final. Naruto didn't include Kakashi (who was sitting up in his hospital bed) because the Hatake was already included, as was the Uzumaki himself.

"What does the seal do?" Minato questioned with narrowed eyes. Despite them allowing him to put and perform the seal on them, they were still suspicious and tense. The Uzumaki twins were clueless along with the three year old Uchiha Sarada, while Sakura and Obito looked like they were about ready to pulverize the Uzumaki at any suspicious movement they thought he made.

"Jeez, put some faith in me dattebayo," he grumbled as he turned around pushed everything to the side—tables, stray blankets, pillows and chairs—and against the wall.

He practically dipped his entire hand into a small pot of blood (that was originally for ink only), and started drawing a large, perfect circle on the ground, pushing Kazuhiko back into Kazuhito and making Kazuhiko snap at his younger twin out of boredom. Naruto rolled his eyes, dipping his fingers into the bowl again and making ten lines of mini fūinjutsu kanji that went towards the middle, leaving the middle open. The fūinjutsu kanji were things that one would recognize as "scribbles" at first glance.

The Uzumaki proceeded to write down two perfect repeating kanji (時間—Jikan, it read) around the outside of the circle before finally finishing, sighing in relief. "M'kay…done…kids go first."

"What? Why?" Sasuke asked.

"It'll be safer," Naruto explained. "If they stay, they'll get caught up in the…uh, building…collapse."

"What the fu—"

"Obito, there are children here," Kakashi chided.

"What the h-heck are you talking about?" Obito snapped, stumbling to use appropriate language.

"It's not like the world is going to end," Naruto replied, lying smoothly through his teeth. "It's just risky. One of the adults can go along."

"I'll go," Minato said. "Kazuhiko and Kazuhito are the only ones who'll listen to me."

Sakura looked a little bit doubtful, but sighed and handed Sarada off to him. "You be good, listen to Mina-oji-san, okay?" she said. Sarada hugged Minato's neck, blinking furiously and nodding her understanding. Sakura smiled, and kissed her daughters forehead.

"Walk to the middle," Naruto ordered. "Don't mess with the fūinjutsu."

Kazuhiko frowned. "The what?"

"The scribbles," his twin cleared up.

"Oh."

"Hurry up," the oldest Uzumaki said. The four headed into the middle, all three of them looking uneasy (well, except for Kazuhiko, he was asking a bunch of questions).

Naruto rolled his eyes, putting up his index and middle finger. A pulse of demonic energy and chakra mixed together later, they were gone. "Sasuke, Sakura and Obito next," he said.

"Where did they go?" Sasuke asked skeptically.

Naruto craned his neck, smiling a smile only a devil would smile. "To the place where you're going," he shot back. "Now hurry up. Everything's gonna disappear at this rate."

The three shot glances at him, Obito nervously waving his goodbye at Kakashi before stepping into the middle of the circle. Naruto sent a half-assed waved of his own, smiling weakly before sending them away as well. He covered his mouth, coughing and wheezing. Kakashi got out of the hospital bed, eyeing his hand. He spotted the blood and sighed. "You're cutting off so many years right now…"

"I know," Naruto snapped. "It'll be undone, and the same goes for you. Get in the circle before I collapse."

The Hatake shot him a weary look, but obeyed, stepping in the circle. "Will you follow?"

"Of course," Naruto replied. "I'll be way ahead of you." He frowned. "Or maybe behind. I don't know, you'll know of me eventually."

Kakashi blinked, but slowly nodded. Then, he too disappeared, leaving Naruto all alone. He laughed bitterly, stepping into the circle. He could feel the chakra signatures surrounding him disappearing, fading into nothingness. The natural chakra signatures were disappearing, too…everything was leaving so peacefully.

…He wouldn't know peace for a long time.

Naruto put his index and middle finger, pulsing chakra and demonic energy once more. The hospital room was engulfed in darkness very quickly, disappearing into nothing.

But the Uzumaki was already long gone.

"Fubuki": "Snowstorm": "Blizzard"; "Snow Blizzard"

"Kazuhiko": "Harmonious Prince"

"Kazuhito": "Harmonious Widespread"

"Shōsen Jutsu": "Majestic Palm Technique"

"Jikan": "time"

New style. It's working out for me, I like it. The banner above will prolly show up every chapter. Maybe, maybe not.

Sigh.

Peace! :3