Chapter 2:
Welcome to the House of Black
Harry and Hermione were going to arrive any minute.
Sirius paced the floor of the front parlour, an untouched glass of firewhiskey in one hand and his restless thoughts on the other.
His eyes kept drifting to the clock on the mantlepiece as he counted down the seconds to their arrival.
With the Order, everything was timed and precise, so that you knew if anything went wrong.
Mad-Eye, Remus, Tonks, Kingsley and several other aurors had gone to escort Harry and Hermione from their respective homes to Grimmauld Place, so no Death Eaters tailed them. Sirius wanted to go but, of course, he was not allowed.
'Sorry Sirius, you could come along as a dog,' Mad-Eye had grunted, 'but it would be an extra liability, 'sides which it would appear odd to have a dog tagging along.'
Sirius told him he understood but as soon as they left, he threw a fit and smashed a few things that were left lying around.
He couldn't stand being locked in this house all the time. Though lately it seemed that was all everyone told him, 'stay behind',and he began to doubt the wisdom of his plan when he gave Grimmauld Place as headquarters for the Order.
At the time, it seemed like the perfect way to keep part of the Order and to have a place where Harry could visit him. It had not been easy staying in a cave so that he could be near Harry at Hogwarts, yet he never would have returned to Grimmauld Place unless it were for the Order. The Order was the only real chance he had of keeping track of Voldemort and Pettigrew.
Though he sometimes suspected Dumbledore of deliberately hiding things from him to hinder his progress. Damn meddling bastard.
He clenched his fist but then breathed heavily out to calm himself. For the thousandth time today, he tried to focus on the present and stay in the right frame of mind. Harry is safe for now. Harry will be arriving soon and it's best he doesn't find his godfather a brooding miserable asshole. Even if that's probably how he'd been most of the time the Weasleys were here. Yet he had to put in an effort now that Harry was arriving. Merlin's sake, he'd even put an effort into dressing himself today. Though a part of him wanted to rip off the elegant wizard robes as soon as he saw himself in the mirror and realized he looked exactly like his father. That pompous prick. But it was too late to change now.
He heard the front door creak open and muffled voices began to trail in. Everyone had to be quiet when they entered the house so they wouldn't wake his mother's portrait, that charming harpy from his childhood.
But a loud clang broke the silence followed by Tonk's swearing. As if on cue, his mother's portrait began to screech her head off and the usual filthy words came out of her mouth.
Sirius rushed towards the entrance hall to the source of the commotion. The last thing he wanted was his godson to be greeted by that harpy's insults.
"Filth! Scum! By-products of dirt and vileness. Half-breeds, mutants, freaks, begone from this place! How dare you befoul the house of my fathers-"
"Shut up, you horrible old hag, shut UP!" he yelled at the portrait.
His mother's wrinkled eyes bulged at the sight of her forsaken son. "Youuuu! You blood traitor, abomination, shame of my flesh!" her screeches grew louder.
"I said -shut - UP!" he screamed over her as he forcibly closed the curtains over the wretched painting. He flicked his wand at the gaslights in the hall so that they burned brighter and he could see the faces of his new arrivals.
"Harry, you made it!"
Harry looked so much like his father now that without thinking of what he was doing, Sirius clasped him into a hug. Because it was like seeing James again.
"How was your trip here?"
"A bit unnerving but good," Harry spoke quickly and out of breathe in his excitement, "No death eaters. And we got to broomstick ride through London."
"That's brilliant," Sirius said and tried to smile though it pained him that he couldn't be there to taste the fresh air.
"Yeah, it was. Hey, did you hear about my ministry Hearing?"
"Yes, it's absolute rubbish! The Ministry should be congratulating you for fending off the Dementors by yourself, not trying to expel you for it," he paused, "Though it'd be asking rather a lot from a group too thick to even notice Voldemort's back!"
Harry's happy smile faltered and Sirius realized his godson was suffering more than he let on. "That's what I don't understand Sirius, why haven't any of the papers or Ministry accepted Voldemort's back?"
"Didn't Dumbledore inform you?" Sirius demanded angrily though he already knew the answer. Dumbledore never told anyone anything unless he absolutely had to...and even then it was struggle to get answers out of him.
"No!" Harry said, "Hermione told me that she and Ron were warned not to tell me anything important in their letters in case the owls were intercepted."
Hermione.
Sirius immediately turned around and realized she was standing there awkwardly with a small suitcase in her hand.
"Hermione!" he said quickly, embarrassed that he forgot to greet her, "Good to see you. How are things?"
He extended a hand to shake hers and noticed that except for being taller, she looked about the same as he remembered, give and take a few details. She had the same bushy brown hair, brown eyes, and the awkward way she had of speaking while moving her eyebrows around a lot and frowning too much for someone of her age.
"Good, I mean it's good to see you again Sirius," she said in a small voice and squirmed under his gaze, "Thank you for letting me stay here."
He was surprised by how uncomfortable she seemed. He didn't remember Hermione being shy.
"Well, we couldn't have Ron and Harry here without you, could we?" He smiled to put her at ease and turned to Harry so that he could agree with him. "Wouldn't be much of a Golden Trio without her, would it Harry?"
He expected Hermione to beam with pride at being reminded that she was part of something greater than herself, a golden trio that could accomplish much more together than they ever could apart as individuals...just as he had been proud to be part of the Marauders...but she looked as if he'd just insulted her.
He was about to ask her if she is alright when Harry interrupted him.
"Sirius! I have to know what Voldemort's been up to. No one's told me anything and I can't stand it any longer, I've been waiting the whole summer!"
There was an urgency in Harry's voice that said he would explode if he heard 'no' one more time. Sirius put a hand on Harry's shoulder to calm him, "Of course I will, but we'll need to talk to the other Order members first. The meeting finished before you arrived and there won't be another meeting for another few days but between Arthur, Lupin and me we can lift the ban-"
"What ban?"
"The secrecy ban is a protective spell so no one single member can betray the Order of the Pheonix's secrets to non-members. But we only need three Order members to lift the ban so you can hear everything I'm going to tell you."
He led him towards the dining room.
He expected Hermione to follow them and demand to be made an honourary member too. But she slipped off without a word. He felt surprised again. Whatever happened to the crazy girl who helped rescue him and Buckbeak in her third year? He thought Hermione would be the first to demand to know the Order's secrets. Instead she just disappeared out of the room like a flighty bird. It was rather odd. He reminded himself to ask Harry later if everything was alright with his friend.
~/~
Sirius had never gotten along well with Molly Weasley, not the first time around in the Order and certainly not now that the she'd had a gaggle of kids and thought she could be Dumbledore's mouthpiece in his absence. Her imperious attitude had only worsened with age.
Lupin and Arthur Weasley had barely spoken a word either for or against the argument and had let Molly steamroll over him. Bloody cowards. They had no trouble facing death eaters but when it came to the Weasley matriarch, the two men would rather keep their mouths shut. The kids also watched intently from the side as if they are watching an intense football match between their mother and Sirius. Everyone was there except Hermione.
"Harry needs and wants to know what's been going on, and that's the end of it," Sirius said as he slammed down his hand on the table.
Molly's bloated red face stared at him venomously. "That's not up for you to decide, Sirius! Dumbledore clearly said we were not to tell Harry more than he needs to know."
"I'm perfectly aware of what Dumbledore said, Molly, thanks." Sirius rolled his eyes. "I don't plan on telling Harry more than he needs to know."
"If you actually respected what Dumbledore said," Molly's voice grew irritatingly loud and he could see spittle fly out of her mouth, "You would wait until we got his approval before attempting to lift the ban!"
He was beginning to lose my patience for this insufferable woman but he said as patiently as possible "The whole point of the secrecy ban is that we only need three people to lift it, so we don't have to wait for Dumbledore."
"You are not in charge here, Sirius," Molly yelled, "This may be your house but it is not up to you to decide what's best for Harry-"
"I'm his godfather! It's my duty to look after him!" His voice raised. Nothing could stop him from protecting the boy and trying to do what's best for him.
"Yes," a horrible smile stretched Molly's face, "that's true, Sirius, only you couldn't look after him very well while in Azkaban, could you?"
He felt sick to his stomach. If Molly wanted to hurt him, she just did. She might as well have stuck a dagger to his heart.
"Molly, that isn't fair and you know it," Lupin said quickly, knowing that his friend's temper was about to burst, "Sirius suffered a great deal in Azkaban and you shouldn't fault him for it."
"My apologies," Molly simpered without an ounce of remorse in her voice, "I just don't take it lightly that Sirius thinks he can waltz into Harry's life now and know what's best for Harry. Harry's only a boy afterall and needs responsible guidance."
"I'm not a child!" Harry yelled, "I need to know what's been going on!"
Molly looked taken aback by the level of Harry's anger.
"The Order doesn't accept members below the age of majority," Remus said quietly, "and you're only 16, Harry, so technically you are still a child."
"This is complete bollocks, Harry's seen much more than many adults," Sirius growled.
"That doesn't change the fact that he's still not an adult!" Molly shouted again, "No matter what Harry's seen, he's a child and needs to be protected. At least I realize that, whereas I think you confuse Harry with James!"
"Molly, cut it out," Arthur finally said but it was too late. The words had already been spoken.
Sirius stared at Molly as if he'd never seen anything so vile.
Vile, vile, vile.
Only a vile mind could use his love for James and his time in Azkaban as rebukes against him. To reduce 12 years spent wrongfully convicted in prison as a cheap excuse to insult him and his forced absence from Harry's life. As if he had any choice to not be there. Then again, Sirius thought, he should have expected dirty tactics from the same woman who got pregnant to trap Arthur Weasley into a loveless marriage. Something he never stooped so low as to repeat to anyone. Molly's sort of tactics were beneath him.
He stood up from his chair. "I AM TRYING TO PROTECT HARRY AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF I'M GOING TO LET HIM REMAIN IGNORANT OF WHAT VOLDEMORT IS UP TO WHILE HIS LIFE IS ON THE LINE! IN CASE YOU HAVE TROUBLE REMEMBERING, MOLLY, HARRY WAS THE ONE WHO SAW VOLDEMORT COME BACK FROM THE DEAD AND TRY TO KILL HIM, SO I WOULD SAY HE HAS A RIGHT TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON RIGHT NOW, NOT TOMORROW, NOT THE DAY AFTER, NOT WHEN DUMBLEDORE COMES BACK BUT RIGHT NOW!"
"Sirius, would you please lower your voice," Lupin tugged at the sleeve of his robes, "and sit down."
Sirius grey eyes softened as he looked back down at his friend pulling at his sleeve. When they both were at Hogwarts, Remus often tried to stop Sirius when he was getting ahead of himself and getting himself in more trouble. Despite the passage of years, Remus was still the same damnably calm presence, it was almost irritating.
Sirius sat back down.
Remus turned back to Molly who's face was red and more blotchy than ever. His voice was controlled and even, "Sirius does have a point Molly. Harry has been through a lot since the Tournament, he shouldn't have to wait any longer for answers. It's wrong to leave him ignorant and we can easily lift the Ban."
"We can tell him the bare necessities, dear," Arthur Weasley said while patting his wife's chubby hand, "Dumbledore can't disagree with that."
"Fine," Molly hissed while staring daggers at Sirius, "I see my and Albus' opinion is not going to be respected. Well on your own heads be it, but I'm not going to disobey Albus and help you lift the secrecy ban."
She turned to leave and Sirius sighed in relief. Finally.
"C'mon kids," Molly ordered sharply, "Ginny, Ron, Fred, George, you're leaving right now. Off to bed."
All hell broke loose as Ginny, Ron and the twins protested that they wanted to stay and listen too.
"Fred and I are 17 we're old enough to be in the Order!" the twins hollered, followed by Ron and Ginny's loud complaints.
"Mum, this isn't fair!"
"Harry's my best mate, I have to stay!"
Despite a huge amount of opposition, Molly managed to eventually take her brats out of the room with her. So finally it was just Harry, Lupin, Arthur and Sirius around the table. For Harry's sake, Sirius tried to pretend that the past half hour of Molly insulting him didn't just happen.
~/~
For the next hour, they told Harry everything they could tell him without compromising either his or the Order's safety.
They told him how Voldemort was hiding his presence, keeping a low profile while his followers lurked in the shadows in increasing numbers to do his bidding in Britain and abroad. They informed Harry about the deliberate media blackout of any mention of Voldemort meanwhile the papers regularly published lies about Harry and Dumbledore to discredit them. They gave Harry hints about Voldemort's secret weapon without giving too much away. They told Harry as much as they could about Voldemort's infiltration of the media and ministry without naming names or who's who that might give Harry the wrong idea and try to get vigilante justice.
"But what does Voldemort want?!" Harry finally said in frustration, "Why hasn't he come back to kill me?"
"Harry, don't you see?" Sirius said almost impatiently, "This isn't about just you this time, Voldemort wants to wage a full war. Against the ministry, against the muggle world and the wizarding world. That's why he's taking his time, he wants to take down everything."
Harry was shocked into silenced.
"He's assembling a whole army, Harry. It's no longer going to be just him and a few Death Eaters this time around."
"What about the Order?" Harry asked, "Can't you stop him?"
"I'm afraid we don't have numbers anywhere near those of Voldemort's," Lupin said and shook his head sadly, "With the way the Ministry is behaving, I'm afraid it's just us against Voldemort for now."
"This is complete bollocks! We have to put a stop to Voldemort before he gets any stronger!" Harry shouted at them.
"I know." Sirius felt numb as he said the words, as if he were admitting defeat. Yet he would be lying to both himself and Harry if he tried to sound more optimistic.
And he knew that Harry needed to hear the truth because he knew exactly what Harry was feeling. It was the same feeling he woke with everyday, knowing that Voldemort went from strength to strength, meanwhile the Order tried to scurry after him and he could do fuck all to help them.
"Harry, you cannot repeat anything we've told you here," Arthur said, breaking the tension in the room.
"...I won't," Harry said with hesistation and Sirius knew at once that his godson was lieing. Of course, Harry would want to tell each detail to Ron, and Hermione.
They would be counting on him, as his best friends.
"Don't worry, Harry, you won't be able to even if you try," Sirius said with an apologetic smile.
"What d'you mean?"
"Should I tell him?" Arthur asked meekly.
"Not just yet, Arthur. Let him figure it out on his own. It'll be worth a laugh," Sirius said grimly. Though he felt far past laughter.
~/~
The excitement Sirius felt of welcoming Harry to Grimmauld Place and letting him in on the Order's secrets had worn thin. No small thanks to Molly Weasley's attempts to humiliate him in front of everyone and depict him as a raving madman. Everyone was there to witness her humiliating insults, except Hermione. Though it looked like Ginny was filling her in right now. He tried to ignore them though it is obvious that they were speaking of him. Ginny kept glancing over at him and laughing loudly. The damn red-headed chit was a junior version of her mother. Hermione looked more solemn but she still drank in every poisoned word Ginny must be saying to her. Harry sat at his side. The boy was still going on about what we told him about the Order and Voldemort.
Sirius was beginning to wonder if it was such a good idea to tell him as much as they did.
Now that Harry knew a bit, it had only fed his curiosity to know everything. The boy kept going over each detail they told him and asking more questions to try to trick him into revealing things he shouldn't. But when Harry began to ask about the Order's secret weapon, Sirius drew the line.
"Harry, would you quit trying to trip me up! I've already told you more than enough."
"I don't get it," Harry said accusingly, "I thought you wanted me to be better prepared for Voldemort, I thought you understood."
"Harry," he said heavily and looked squarely into his eyes which are so much like Lily's though the rest of his face was a splitting image of James, "I may not like how Dumbledore conducts himself, I may even hate him sometimes, but I can't completely disregard everything he says. He's still the leader of the Order of the Phoenix, for better or for worse. So I can't give you what you're asking for."
Harry didn't understand. "So now you're backing up on your word, is that it? You agree with Molly Weasley now?"
He wanted to tell Harry to behave himself but that would be condescending and he wasn't his father. So he took a breath and tried to regain his patience
"Harry I never said I could tell you everything, only some things."
"Yes, but what does it matter now? I can't repeat anything can I? I already tried to tell Ron something and my tongue got tied in a knot. The Secrecy Ban isn't exactly subtle!"
The Tongue-Tying spell wasn't the only component of the Secrecy ban, but Harry would discover that himself if he tried to say anything more about the Order to Ron or Hermione.
"Sorry Harry. I don't always listen to Dumbledore but I'm not going to outright defy him on this."
"Why, is there some spell that will tie your balls in a knot?!" Harry shouted.
He didn't think he'd laugh again that day, but somehow Sirius found himself laughing so loudly the sound of his laughter filled the room. Even though the joke was childish and stupid.
Harry started laughing too.
Everybody at the table stared at them, including Hermione. Her eyes stared angrily at his.
He didn't understand why Hermione was staring at him so hatefully but he shrugged it off. Female behaviour often exceeded his understanding.
When their laughter died down, he turned back to his godson and looked him squarely in the eyes to try to make him understand.
"The truth is, Harry, I could not tell you what the secret weapon is even if I wanted to."
"Why?" Harry said in disappointment.
"Only Dumbledore, Kingsley and I are aware of it, and we don't even fully understand it. Or maybe Dumbledore does but he doesn't let on that he does."
Harry hesitated for a moment as he mulled over this. "Does it involve me?"
Sirius shook his head.
"No, actually, it involves me." But he didn't answer anymore of Harry's questions. Though he loves Harry more than anything, there were some things Sirius could never tell him. Despite what Molly said, he was not irresponsible. He wouldn't endanger Harry's well-being by telling him what the secret weapon was. If Harry knew, it might compromise everything.
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A/N: Ooh. What do you think the Order of the Phoenix's secret weapon could be? Will it change the course of events? I'm trying to keep as true to the characters as possible, which is why I paraphrased some lines from the Order of the Phoenix when Molly insults Sirius...but I also added in things that were not in the book. Like the Secrecy Ban and the secret weapon that involves Sirius rather than Harry. Expect surprises.
Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed the story so far!