A/N: Well, I suppose you've all been gnawing your fingernails waiting for
this. ^_^;;; I've been rather busy lately, and trying to think of the
right angle to approach this from. So, without further ado, here's the
next chapter in my Introspection fic.
Introspection
Kagome
***
Ah, the well.
Such an old well, and a dry one. Grandfather always called it the bone- eater's well, but I never knew quite why. Grandfather was always telling so many stories about the history of our shrine, of the well and the trees and the very stones.... We never really listened to him, because he always told such stories, no matter what about. He even told them about our dinners.
Maybe I should've listened more.
Then maybe I might have been somewhat prepared when that old, dry well--and the demon in it--took me back to feudal Japan. When it took me back to where I met my new friends.
Where I met him.
Pinned to the old Goshinboku, the sacred tree that has always stood within our shrine for as long as I've known. The tree where Father proposed to Mother. The tree that's been with my brother and myself through every triumph, every defeat, every small and seemingly insignificant memory.
The tree that now means more to me than ever before.
Because Goshinboku was where I met him, that boy who at first irritated me to no end. Who tried to take the sacred jewel which had been in my body. Who even tried to kill me to get at the jewel.
The boy who now breaks my heart with his indecision.
He still loves her, the girl who looks like me. The old priestess says I am the girl's reincarnation, but all we seem to have in common is looks. She hates him. She hates me. She seems to hate everything around her. How can I be her?
I know he wants me to be her. I can see it in his eyes when he looks at me that way, when he thinks no one notices. He looks at me and sees her, and wants me to be her. Because she would never go back through the well to her own world, because this world is hers. Because she has greater power than me. Because he loved her first, and loves her still.
Nevermind that she and I are supposed to be the same person. He still wants her more than me.
I can tell.
All I am to him is someone who can sense the shards of the jewel. Maybe a friend now, a traveling companion, but nothing more. He doesn't even let me go back to my world to see my family and my friends and to take my tests so I can get into a good high school. He always tries to stop me, except for once or twice when he's actually tried to force me to stay there. He puzzles me sometimes.
But I'm too much like my mother. I stay strong during hard times, no matter how alone I may be. Even if that puzzling boy does go to her, the woman who hates him, I'll still have my other friends here. I'll survive. I have to.
And maybe, just maybe, he'll finally notice me.
Introspection
Kagome
***
Ah, the well.
Such an old well, and a dry one. Grandfather always called it the bone- eater's well, but I never knew quite why. Grandfather was always telling so many stories about the history of our shrine, of the well and the trees and the very stones.... We never really listened to him, because he always told such stories, no matter what about. He even told them about our dinners.
Maybe I should've listened more.
Then maybe I might have been somewhat prepared when that old, dry well--and the demon in it--took me back to feudal Japan. When it took me back to where I met my new friends.
Where I met him.
Pinned to the old Goshinboku, the sacred tree that has always stood within our shrine for as long as I've known. The tree where Father proposed to Mother. The tree that's been with my brother and myself through every triumph, every defeat, every small and seemingly insignificant memory.
The tree that now means more to me than ever before.
Because Goshinboku was where I met him, that boy who at first irritated me to no end. Who tried to take the sacred jewel which had been in my body. Who even tried to kill me to get at the jewel.
The boy who now breaks my heart with his indecision.
He still loves her, the girl who looks like me. The old priestess says I am the girl's reincarnation, but all we seem to have in common is looks. She hates him. She hates me. She seems to hate everything around her. How can I be her?
I know he wants me to be her. I can see it in his eyes when he looks at me that way, when he thinks no one notices. He looks at me and sees her, and wants me to be her. Because she would never go back through the well to her own world, because this world is hers. Because she has greater power than me. Because he loved her first, and loves her still.
Nevermind that she and I are supposed to be the same person. He still wants her more than me.
I can tell.
All I am to him is someone who can sense the shards of the jewel. Maybe a friend now, a traveling companion, but nothing more. He doesn't even let me go back to my world to see my family and my friends and to take my tests so I can get into a good high school. He always tries to stop me, except for once or twice when he's actually tried to force me to stay there. He puzzles me sometimes.
But I'm too much like my mother. I stay strong during hard times, no matter how alone I may be. Even if that puzzling boy does go to her, the woman who hates him, I'll still have my other friends here. I'll survive. I have to.
And maybe, just maybe, he'll finally notice me.