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CHAPTER FIFTEEN

"In love, one starts by deceiving oneself… and ends by deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance."

- Oscar Wilde -

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Naruto hasn't been back to Suna since the chunin exams, but it's exactly as he remembers it: a circular village sitting in the hollow of a great canyon, eight segments divided by perfectly straight roads, like pieces of a pie. All of it brown and gold, so unlike Konoha with its riot of colors. This is where he'll find his father and the other rebels—well, the remaining rebels. He hopes more than anything that Sakura, Jiraiya, and Kakashi made it. They must have. They're too strong to fall.

A dozen Suna shinobi meet them at the gate, a stark reminder of how things have changed. For the chunin exams, their party of forty-odd was only met by two nin.

"State your name and business here," says a blonde man with the authoritative air of a captain.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto, the Yellow Flash's son. I'm here to join my father and the rest of the shinobi from Konoha."

A kunoichi steps forward, frowning. Her face is painted scarlet and white in a manner that recalls a fox. She says, "The resistance, you mean."

"He's a monster," another man spits. "You remember those missing-nin who got slaughtered between here and Konoha? His work."

Naruto flinches, because the shinobi isn't wrong.

"And she must be that Hyuuga girl," the painted kunoichi says. "The one who started all this trouble."

Hinata shifts closer to him. Not behind him, but near enough that Naruto hopes she feels safe.

He stands straighter. "You're gonna let us in. One way or another."

The captain and the kunoichi (probably his second) exchange glances. Wordlessly deciding whether they're willing to risk their lives over letting him and Hinata into the village.

Naruto isn't surprised when the captain says, "I'll take you to your father."

The Konoha shinobi are set up in a camp on the southern edge of the village. There are at least a hundred tents, which means more of the rebels escaped than not, but Naruto doesn't breathe easier. Not yet, not until he makes sure his teachers and his best friend are here.

It's Jiraiya who meets him first. He doesn't smile, and that worries Naruto more than anything, but mostly he's relieved that Jiraiya is alive and free.

"You're okay!"

Jaiya holds up his hands, like he wants to ward off a hug or anything else affectionate, and says, "Been wondering when you'd show up. Took your time."

Naruto forces himself not to scratch the back of his head. It makes him look nervous, Sakura once told him.

"Is Sakura here? And Kakashi?"

"Yeah, your lazy sensei made it," Jiraiya says.

In the heavy pause that follows, Naruto's blood runs cold. Hinata takes his hand in hers and squeezes gently. That, and only that, gives him the strength to say, "Sakura. What about her?"

Jiraiya grasps his shoulder. "She's alive, but she's not here. Our sources say Sasuke didn't kill our people, just imprisoned them." His mouth twitches, then he says, "Apparently Orochimaru developed some kind of shackles that suck out your chakra, so they can't fight."

Naruto swallows heavily. "She can't escape then. None of them can."

"She'll be all right," Jiraiya says, so firmly that Naruto almost believes him.

"C'mon. Your dad will be glad to see you." He looks at Hinata apologetically and says, "Probably best if you stay here."

Naruto jerks away from Jiraiya. "Hey! You can't just order her to stay like a dog—"

"Naruto."

Hinata says his name quietly, but there's steel beneath the softness, and it startles him.

"It's fine," she says. "Go see your father. I'll get a tent and supplies for us, okay?"

Jiraiya chuckles. "For us is it? You two have been busy. Guess that's why it took you three weeks to—"

Naruto growls, and his sensei laughs. Which at least gets him to shut up.

He follows Jiraiya deeper into the camp, weaving through tents and fire pits and bedrolls. As they go, Jiraiya catches him up on who escaped: Kakashi, Obito, Rin, Tsunade, Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji, Lee, Asuma, Kurenai. As well as who didn't: Iruka, Dan, Gai, Tenten. And Sakura, of course. There are many others, but none of the names of the dead are ones he knows well.

Dad's tent is at the heart of the camp. It's larger than anyone else's, and when Naruto follows Jiraiya inside, he sees why. A large table takes up most of the space, and a map is spread out across it. This must be where the resistance's captains meet to discuss strategy.

For the moment, Naruto only cares about his father, who looks utterly unsurprised to see him. There's something else in his expression that Naruto can't quite identify, an odd flatness.

Dad strides forward and pulls him into a hug. "I'm glad you made it in one piece. And Hinata?"

"She's, uh… she's good," Naruto says.

When Dad lets him go, Jiraiya chuckles. "Seems like the two of you are more than good. Looked downright cozy to me."

Naruto opens his mouth to argue, but Dad holds up a hand and both of them fall silent.

There it is again, the strange blank cast to his eyes. Naruto finally realizes what it is when his father turns to him: anger.

"Because of your actions, the rebellion is in shambles. Many of our people died, and even more were captured, all because you couldn't be patient."

Naruto clenches his fists. "I had no way to know that helping Hinata would—"

"You should have," his father says sharply. "You should have known, and because of your recklessness we're in a full on war. We were planning a coup in a month, with the help of a contingent from Mist. Instead—" He gestures at the tent's flap. "Instead we're camped out in the Kazekage's backyard."

All of this settles over Naruto like a lead blanket, weighing him down with guilt. But not regret. "I won't apologize. Hiashi could have killed Hinata. I couldn't let that happen, and you'd have done exactly what I did if it was Mom."

His father looks away. "Don't insult your mother by making an example of her. She died for our cause, and you crippled it."

Naruto stumbles backward, as breathless as if Dad had socked him in the gut. He may as well have.

Jiraiya steps forward. "Minato."

He says nothing more than Dad's name, but something in his father seems to soften anyway.

"I'm glad that you're well, Naruto. I didn't doubt you would be, as strong as you are, but still. It's good to see."

Naruto nods tightly. "Can I go?"

His father turns to the map on the table. His voice sounds distant when he says, "Yes. Leave."

Outside his father's tent, darkness is beginning to fall on Suna, the western sun burning the same deep red as maple leaves in autumn. When it sets beyond the horizon, the world will turn cold. Naruto remembers that from the chunin exams, how the desert heat disappears with the sun.

The resistance is stuck here in this foreign, contradictory place because of him—and those are the lucky ones. Naruto thinks of Sakura sitting in a cell with shackles on her wrists, and he swallows against a clutching pain in his throat. Sakura, his teammate. The girl he wanted who never wanted him back. That seems such a waste now, his foolish longing for Sakura when Hinata was right under his nose. If he paid attention at all, he would have understood his real feelings sooner. But it was never his crush on Sakura that made him care about her. It's her strength and courage, her mettle and the depth of her loyalty to the cause, that he admires. And it's the kindness beneath her hot temper that taught him friendship. That, and his rivalry with Sasuke.

Naruto can't afford to think of Sasuke. Not now, when his world his falling apart.

He takes a deep breath, steadies himself, and sets out to find Hinata.

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Sasuke is on the third hour of the council meeting when a messenger interrupts them with a letter from Neji. Which the genin—a Hyuuga girl of twelve or thirteen—delivers straight to Hiashi. That's troubling, how she doesn't hesitate to give the letter to the head of her clan rather than to her Hokage, but Sasuke chooses not to draw attention to it. Better to file that information away, along with so much else, for future use.

Hiashi looks over the letter quickly, then gives it to Sasuke. When he finishes reading, it takes all of his willpower not to crumple the paper in his fist.

"Naruto," he says. "He's finally joined the rebels in Suna. I'm surprised it took him so long."

Hiashi turns to Sasuke, his voice hard when he says, "And my daughter is with him. I demand that they return her."

That's almost funny enough to make Sasuke laugh. "I'm sure Minato will hand her over if we ask nicely."

Hiashi's mouth tightens, the only outward sign that he's mad. But Sasuke is beginning to understand all the men and women on his council well enough to know that a Hyuuga's anger is a cold, implacable thing. If the Uchiha are fire, then their cousin clan is ice.

"Hinata is not just any runaway girl," Hiashi says, slowly and forcefully. "She's the property of the Hyuuga, and she carries the byakugan. She's too valuable to leave in enemy hands, unless you want the Kazekage to gain the power of our doujutsu. Do you want to imagine a jinchuriki with the byakugan?"

No, he does not, but Sasuke says, "Isn't that what your cursed seal is for? To keep your eyes out of enemies' hands."

Hiashi's jaw works. "Yes, and as far as I know it's never failed. But Suna is home to Chiyo. She sealed Shukaku inside of Gaara, and rumor has it she's mastered forbidden arts that are against natural laws. If anyone could break through our juinjutsu, it's her."

"She's a tired old woman whose poisons Tsunade outsmarted a dozen times during the last war," Sasuke says. "Besides, Minato won't let any harm come to Hinata. She's too important to Naruto. Or did the fact that he stole her out from under you not give that away?"

Hiashi's cheeks flush, and Sasuke takes that as a victory. A petty one, but still. Hinata might not be the favored daughter, but she's Hiashi's child nonetheless, and no doubt the thought of her in bed with Naruto is burning him up. Sasuke wonders which part of it bothers him more: that Hinata would taint Hyuuga blood with a monster, or that the monster could take him in a fight.

"Now, now," Orochimaru says, his voice dripping venom and honey. "Be kind, Sasuke. The man has lost his daughter. And it seems the Kazekage may keep his nephew. It's been almost a month since you sent Neji to Suna, and Gaara still hasn't given him an answer. Or let him leave. The Sand's hospitality is beginning to look more like captivity for our poor messenger."

His cousin Juri is new to the council, but when she speaks the room listens. "I met Gaara on an allied mission with him and his siblings a few years ago. He was just a boy, but I watched him kill seven Rain shinobi without breaking a sweat—and he enjoyed it. To be frank, he's terrifying, so if he meant Neji any harm he'd be dead already."

Hyuuga Hana laughs, full and loud. "You've clearly never seen Neji fight. He'd wipe the floor with anyone short of our esteemed Hokage, Naruto, or the Yellow Flash—or Lord Hiashi, of course."

Juri blushes and Hiashi scowls, no doubt because his underling added him as an afterthought. That alone would make Sasuke like Hana, but he doesn't need any more reasons. She's running the hospital almost as well as Tsunade did, even though she prefers combat to the work of a medic-nin, and her competency is one of the few things making his job easier.

"I'm not concerned about Neji," Sasuke says. "Gaara will keep him there until he makes a choice, and then he'll send him home with a decision. Now that Hinata is in Suna, he may get some useful information out of her. That he's been held for so long could work in our favor."

Kabuto leans forward, smiling. "I do wonder why it took them so long to join up with the resistance. Must have found something to keep themselves… occupied, while they were laying low."

Sasuke cuts in before Kabuto can get struck by a gentle fist. "Forget Hinata and Naruto. I want to know where we're at with the Mizukage."

"Nowhere," says his cousin Kai, who returned from Kiri just this morning. "She's in bed with Minato, no doubt. She all but kicked me out of the village and refused our offer."

"You mean our bribe," Hana says under her breath.

Sasuke doesn't scold her for her irreverence; she's not wrong.

The rest of the meeting is both dull and frustrating. Dull because politics are tedious, and frustrating because his council is fractious, snide, and prone to straying from the topics at hand. It's like herding cats.

Hana lingers after the others have departed, watching him with a strangely intent expression, like she's measuring him.

"You wanna get a drink?" she asks. "You look like you need it."

Sasuke raises an eyebrow. "That's not a very respectful thing to say to your Hokage."

She shrugs. "I'm as disrespectful as I can get away with when I'm not at home."

Home. The Hyuuga compound. Sasuke can't imagine that much disrespect is allowed to flourish behind those walls.

"I think it would best not to drink with you," Sasuke says pointedly.

Hana looks very close to laughing. "I'm not hitting on you, Lord Hokage. Not that you're not worth it, but I… have someone. Sort of. Enough that I don't want anyone else." She flaps her hand, like she's trying to wave off her confusion, then says, "I just need sake, and I think you do too."

The last month has taught Sasuke a great deal about solitude, and although he's always been comfortable with his own company, this is different. He's discovering that being alone by choice and being alone because of loss feel very, very different. His parents are dead, his brother and his best friend are traitors, and Sakura—

It hurts to think of Sakura. Which means he hurts damn near all the time. He wishes he could forget her. Stop halfway hating her, because that resentment is eating him alive; stop needing her, because he can't quit imagining what it would be like to hold her again. Not even make love to her or kiss her. Just cradle her in his arms and forget for a few moments that he's in love with a lie.

So, yes, Hana's offer of sake and perhaps even friendship is tempting, but he only says, "Some other time."

That may even be true, but for now, for tonight, he'll remain alone.

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The years since the chunin exams have changed Gaara. Or maybe it was the exams that did the changing, and Naruto simply wasn't around to see the results. He's quieter now, and that menacing air he once carried—the promise of violence always thick around him—has all but disappeared. In its place is an understated strength, no less powerful for its subtlety.

Something almost like a smile flickers at the corner of his mouth when he sees Naruto.

"Thank you for coming," he says, as he claims the chair at the head of the table. "Sit. Please."

Naruto glances at his father, who hasn't been invited to sit down too. Dad nods so quickly and minutely that if he blinked he would have missed it.

Naruto sits to Gaara's right and asks, "Why aren't you allied with us already? Too chickenshit?"

It's not tactful—it's not even nice—but Gaara seems unbothered. Apparently it's hard to ruffle him these days.

"Will you step outside?"

Gaara says it like a question, even though it's not, and Naruto's stomach twists when he realizes that this order is directed at his father.

Dad gives a shallow bow and says, "I'll wait in the hall while the two of you catch up."

Strangely, Naruto feels more at ease without his father in the room. Gaara isn't a friend, exactly, but their fight at the chunin exams taught him to better understand his own loneliness. He thinks it may have done the same for Gaara, and that's a lesson not easily overlooked.

"The Hokage is offering a very generous reward in exchange for turning your people away," Gaara says baldly. "More than we make in a year from all of our contracts and incomes. Sasuke doesn't even expect us to fight you on his behalf. All I have to do is kick you out of my village."

Sasuke was always so damn clever, and not above playing dirty. It makes Naruto want to grind his teeth.

"So why haven't you done it yet?"

Gaara's expression is so impassive that it's impossible to read his thoughts. He doesn't answer for long enough that the silence between them grows uncomfortable, and Naruto tries to sit still. He's not very good at it.

Finally, Gaara says, "I've been waiting for you. My father had a deal with your father, so it's only fitting that the sons negotiate. Don't you think?"

Naruto doesn't agree, but even he knows that would be stupid to say out loud.

"I'm not much for negotiation," he says instead. "I'm more of an action kind of guy, yanno?"

"I disagree. You may not be diplomatic, but you're honest, and you understand people. You even understood me, when no one else could. My father, my brother, my sister—they never managed it, but you did. I haven't forgotten that, and it's why I want to talk to you and not your father."

Naruto gapes, then snaps his mouth shut. For a moment, he remembers his mother warning him not to leave his mouth open like that, or he'll catch flies in it. The memory passes quickly, and he clears his throat in a way that he hopes sounds decisive rather than nervous. Because he's definitely nervous, not decisive.

"Okay. So you wanna talk to me. I'm listening."

"Good," Gaara says, "because I want you to understand that I'm not allying with your rebellion. I'm allying with you, Naruto. Your father's machinations with mine aren't my concern. Minato has made his plans very clear, and while I appreciate that he's a clever man who understands the ways of war, I don't trust him. I trust you. So if the resistance wants Suna's help, I expect a place at the table alongside you. And I want your father to share the reins with the two of us. Equally. The people of the Sand are my responsibility, and if I'm risking their welfare in your fight, there are certain conditions that must be met."

There's too much happening for Naruto to keep up with, too many moving pieces, but one thing is astoundingly clear: he just got promoted from wayward rebel to general.

Gaara's conditions are reasonable. Monetary reward once the war is over, which shouldn't be a problem, considering the depth of Konoha's purse. A generous trade agreement with the Leaf, ensuring that Suna's people will eat well on the Fire Country's food. And most importantly, the promise that once Konoha is in rebel hands, they'll field shinobi on the Sand's behalf in any battles with Iwa or Ame. Both villages have grown hostile towards Suna over the years, and a time may come when Gaara's people need their help as much as they need his now.

"Done," Naruto says. It feels odd, making a decision of such importance without Dad's input. But that's part of the deal, that he assumes responsibility equal to his father's.

Naruto isn't ready for it, but that's too bad. He's discovering quickly that war doesn't care what you're ready for.

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After the incident with Masami, Sasuke moved Sakura to a new house. A cabin hidden deep in the forest, and she imagines that only six people know of her location now: the Hokage and the five shinobi who take turns guarding her, always three on shift together, day in and day out. The woods are even lonelier than the house she left behind, so far removed from the hustle and bustle of the village. At least she has more space now, as she's allowed to roam the cabin. There's even a small library, stocked with dry nonfiction, elegant poetry, and surprisingly entertaining novels. It makes Sakura wonder who this place belonged to last, and why it was abandoned.

The guards bring her groceries so that she can cook for herself. She cooks for them too, which they're wary of at first, but after she feeds them three meals in a row without poisoning them they begin to relax. And when they relax they finally start talking. First compliments about her food, then sharing pieces of their own lives, then questions after her comfort. It seems that the captain has come to see her as something of a pet. A disobedient cat which cannot be left alone, even with its claws pulled, but adorable nonetheless. It's patronizing beyond belief, but Sakura will take patronizing fondness over mistrust and cruelty any day. Fondness she can work with.

On the thirty-third night of her captivity (which she keeps up with on paper now), Sakura lies awake, planning. If she can win the captain's trust, she might be able to convince him to let her out of the cabin unsupervised. She'll play up her weakness and loneliness, so that he dismisses her potential as a threat. If she can get him to pity her enough, he might prove useful.

And there's another thing. She hasn't missed the way he looks at her. His glances grow more heated by the day, and as much as she hates to admit it, her feminine wiles might be her greatest strength at the moment.

This was never Sakura's specialty. All kunoichi are given lessons on seduction, how to use their bodies to lure information out of the unwary. Men usually, but not always. Kurenai taught her class when they were fourteen. Ino, with her beauty and brash confidence, took to those lessons like a fish to water. Which shocked exactly no one. Masami did well too, but in a different way. Under Kurenai's instruction, her natural talent for making everyone like her gave way to a decidedly more alluring charisma. Not that it mattered; they all knew that the future Hokage's wife would never be sent on one of these missions. Hinata failed at everything so spectacularly that Kurenai took pity on her and excused her after the third lesson. Sakura did well enough not to get kicked out of class like Hinata, but the work of seduction never came naturally to her.

Thanks to Sasuke. She couldn't flirt worth a damn with anyone besides him, probably because he owned every square inch of her heart.

He still does.

Sakura gives up on sleep. She pulls a robe on over her nightdress and goes to the library, where she curls up with a romance novel. Actual romance, not porny crap like what Jiraiya writes. It's a story about a daimyo's daughter and her handmaiden, raised together from birth. The handmaiden serves her mistress faithfully, and beneath her expected loyalty there's a softness. Dedication borne from passion more than duty.

Sakura has just reached the first love scene when she hears a door open, then footsteps. Why one of her guards is entering the house in the middle of the night she can't imagine. After dusk they always take up posts outside, two at the front door and one at the back. Keeping threats out as much as keeping her in.

Before she works up the wherewithal to go find out why they're bothering her at one o'clock in the morning, the library door opens.

It isn't a guard. It's Sasuke.

The book slips from her numb fingers and hits the floor with a heavy thump.

"What are you doing here?" Sakura asks.

Her voice sounds warbling and painfully thin. Pathetic.

Sasuke strides over to her. When she starts to stand up, he puts his hands on her shoulders and pushes her back down into her seat on the couch. Not so roughly it hurts, but with enough vehemence that she takes his point without a word.

This is not a meeting between equals. This is a captor visiting his captive, and she'll sit just like this, with him looming over her for however long he likes.

Sasuke doesn't move his hands from her shoulders, and Sakura feels frozen in place despite the heat that washes over her. As if his will alone has turned her as still as a statue.

"What do you think of your new house?" he asks.

It's an oddly sincere question, she can tell, despite how flat Sasuke's tone is. He genuinely wants to know if she likes it here.

"It's a lot nicer than the last place," Sakura says. "I like being able to cook for myself, to read, listen to music. And the tub is really big."

Sasuke narrows his eyes, as if he suspects her of foul play. All she did was mention the bathroom's accommodations.

If he pictured her naked, that's his fault.

Sasuke's grasp on her shoulders tightens, and Sakura looks away from him, her cheeks blazing.

"Are you being treated well?" Sasuke asks. "I told your guards not to hurt you unless you fought."

"No fighting from this corner," Sakura says dryly. "Did you order them not to talk to me too? Because I think they've spoken maybe five words to me. And I mean altogether, not each."

That's a big fat lie, and she told it to see if Sasuke would catch her.

Here we go again, she thinks. More lies.

But it's not as though she has enough freedom to afford the truth.

"Good," Sasuke says. "They're your guards, not your playmates."

It doesn't take much effort to look affronted.

"What are you doing, Sasuke? Did you come here just to taunt me?"

He grabs her chin, and Sakura stiffens, too surprised to even breathe. Because he touched her. It's the first time he's done that since the night of the battle.

"If I have, what are you going to do about it?" he asks.

Nothing. She can do absolutely nothing as long as she wears these pretty little bracelets on her wrists.

Sakura doesn't look away from him. His gaze is so intent on her that she can feel the heat of it everywhere. Anger. Maybe hatred. But maybe desire too.

There's only one way to find out.

She shrugs out of her robe, and Sasuke's fingers tremble on her chin. Her nightdress isn't modest, and for the first time Sakura wonders if that's on purpose. Who picked out these clothes? she wondered, when she first found them in the dresser. She assumed some lackey of Sasuke's had been given the inglorious job of buying a traitor new nightgowns, among other things.

Had he always planned to come here? To see her in her gauzy nightgown, so thin that her nipples show through it.

Sasuke swallows, and she watches his throat work. That heat she felt only grows warmer and there's no mistaking it now, the lust beneath his fury.

Sakura finally answers him. "I guess I have no choice but to do whatever you want."

He closes his eyes, his jaw tight, saying nothing.

Again, she remembers Kurenai's classes. Seduction can be either subtle or overt, but the true trick of it is in your earnestness. You have to look like you mean it. You have to sell the promise of sex with as much sincerity as you can. And depending on the assignment, it may be a promise you have to keep. Sakura never took one of the scarlet scroll missions, but it seems she's in the middle of one now.

At least she won't have to work hard to look eager, because she is eager. It's pitiful how much she still wants him, this man who has locked her in a cage. Any self respecting kunoichi would resent him for it, but Sakura lost respect for herself a long time ago, and she's beginning to think that nothing will ever douse her desire for Sasuke.

She touches his knee and slowly runs her fingers up his thigh.

He opens his eyes then, and she knows without a word that she's won.

Sasuke unbuckles his belt and unzips his pants. Sakura squeezes her legs together, trying to ease the ache between them, and she's sure he notices. Sasuke never misses anything, least of all about her. He strokes his cock, already half hard and getting harder by the moment.

"Take off your nightgown," he says.

So Sakura does. She'll do whatever he wants, and she has no idea how much of that is strategy and how much is plain, raw need. Lies and truths so hopelessly entwined together that she'll never untangle them.

"Panties too," he orders, his voice harsh. "I want you naked."

Sakura obeys, even though she knows he isn't going to touch her any more than necessary. Her nakedness isn't in preparation for anything he might do to please her; it's simply for him to enjoy the sight of. She should hate that, and him, and the fact that what they're about to do will corrupt the love he held for her not long ago. Love she still holds for him, and that's why she can't hate any of this, no matter how it's going to ruin them.

It doesn't matter. They're already broken beyond repair.

Sakura expects him to be rough with her, but he's as tender as ever, and that makes it far better and far worse at once. He threads his fingers through her hair while she sucks him, silent except for his increasingly ragged breathing. He doesn't pull her hair or fuck her mouth, only holds onto her gently as she takes him deep, then teases the tip of him, then takes him deep again. She missed this. His taste, salty and masculine on her tongue, and the way his whole body goes rigid as he gets close, taut then trembling.

When he comes, Sasuke's hold on her hair finally turns brutal, and he rocks forward, spilling down her throat.

"Sakura."

Her name is a curse and a prayer the way he says it. When she pulls back, his taste is still thick on her tongue, and she doubts anything will wash it away for days. Sasuke won't look at her as he tucks himself away and fixes his clothes.

Sakura has hated herself for a very long time, but this is different, a special low. She knows she chose this, even needed it. It's not something he made her do, but it hurts to parse the details of her motivation. Part hope that base pleasure might make him care for her again. Part lust, part fear, part love, part grief. How much of each pushed her to this, she has no idea.

Once he's decent, Sasuke grasps her hair and tilts her head back. "You wanted that," he says, like it's a command.

If she didn't know him so well she wouldn't see it for what it actually is: a question.

Sakura nods shakily. Her voice is no steadier when she says, "I'll always want you."

Sasuke lets go of her and takes a careful step backward. He looks over her, his gaze assessing and almost cold now.

"You can get dressed. I'm done with you."

She understands, and she isn't offended. The only way Sasuke can allow himself to have her is if he's using her. Anything more vulnerable would shame him. Kindness and reciprocation might give her the impression that she's forgiven, and she's certain he'd die before granting her an ounce of absolution.

She doesn't want to be absolved anyway.

Sakura picks up her discarded nightgown and pulls it on. Her panties stay on the floor, green lace so fragile against the hardwood. Sasuke's hands curl into fists at his sides, then relax, then clench again. He looks furious as he bends down, snatches up her underwear, and tosses them to her. She catches the scrap of fabric, certain she must be blushing from head to toe, and unsure of why this is what embarrasses her after everything they just did.

Sakura can see the tension in his body, how he's on the verge of leaving, like a bird poised to take flight.

"Will you come back?" she asks.

Sasuke runs a hand through his hair, a frazzled, helpless gesture that doesn't suit him at all.

Then he says, "Yes."

There's resentment in his voice, so poisonous that she can't begin to guess how much of it is directed at himself and how much is for her.

He turns then, and Sakura stares at the floor, because she can't bear to watch him leave.

She stays in that exact spot for a long while, thinking about all the love they once made together. Knowing that this thing they did tonight was far from it. The pleasure she'd given him was all about power. Both of them trying to regain their own, and to steal some from the other.

Sasuke meant to put her in her place, and it worked, because she feels thoroughly shamed. And she aimed to soften him toward her, to use her body to earn back some of his affection.

Sakura wonders if her ploy worked as well as his did.

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AN: I wrote this entire chapter two days ago in almost one straight shot, all 5700 words (making it the longest chapter in the story so far), then couldn't find the focus to edit it. I spent forever trying to figure out why my brain was all over the place before I realized I hadn't taken my meds. So to all my fellow fic writers out there who struggle with mental illness, don't forget your meds!

Many thanks to everyone who's following and reviewing this story. I can't tell you how much it means to me every time I get an email notification from FFN telling me someone commented. And speaking of which, I'm absolutely thrilled to see this fic hit 1000 reviews! I'm not embarrassed to admit that I watched that number like a hawk until it hit 1k lol. Anyway, thank you guys so much! And if you have a moment to comment, let me know what you thought of this update. :)

The term "scarlet scroll mission" is a reference to SilverShine's fabulous (and tragically unfinished) KakaSaku fic Scarlet Scroll. If you check it out, please keep in mind that it was written eight years when content warnings weren't so much in vogue, and as it's a dark story it's chock full of potentially triggering material that isn't warned for.