TITLE: She would know.
Description: As news arrives of Olivers death. Felicity holds on to the hope that he's alive….Because if he was dead. Show would know…right?
DISCLAIMER: I do not own arrow, simply writing this for entertainment. Think the powers that be write a great show.
A/N: Not sure if I am 100% happy with this but I knew if I didn't post it I never would. First Arrow fic - My version of the aftermath of 309 - Please review if you think I should continue, and any thoughts you have of where this should go. I have two ideas in my head and sort of torn about how they all come together. Hope you enjoy
"Felicity" Oliver smiles at her with one of his seldom seen grins, his hand cupping her cheek and she leans into it, bringing her own hands up to press against his chest, her thumbs rubbing the material of his shirt. "I love you" he whispers as his lips ghost over hers and she closes her eyes humming happily. The moment feels perfect but a deep unease seems to rise inside her and she can feel his body tensing beneath her fingers
"Felicity…." She frowns at the ragged and pained tone in his voice, her chest aching for him and she opens her eyes to see heartbreak reflected in his. There's something wet and sticky on her palm and she lifts her hand to her face narrowing her eyes at the sight before her.
Blood.
Oliver's blood. It covers her hands and she can feel her heart racing as a sob leaves her throat. He's still calling to her and she tries to focus on his face, the pain in his eyes. "How could you let me go?" She shakes her head against his words, her hands gripping his shirt to desperately keep a hold of him. "Why didn't you tell me?" Her eyes blur with unshed tears, unable to speak again the worsening ache in her heart. His hands reach out to her as he starts to fade from her view, her name still on his lips.
"Oliver!" The scream rips from her throat as Felicity sits up in bed panting, the last dregs of the nightmare leaving her. She grabs at her chest and tries to get her self back under control, swallowing against the lump in her throat. It was just a dream and she closes her eyes but she can't shake the cold that creeps up her spine nor the ache of her empty heart. She throws herself back against the damp sheets and fails to hold back the tears that fall.
Its been five days.
Five days since she had last seen his face.
Five days since he had left to fight Ra's Al Ghul.
Five days since he had pressed his lips to her forehead and told her he loved her. And she had said nothing. She had stood there in silence. Again. Letting him go without ever knowing what she felt. But he had promised he would do what she asked. He would kill Ra'Al Ghul to save his sister. And then when he came back….She'd tell him.
He'd be back.
And so she went on. She got up, went to work, went to bed though she barely slept and then she repeated it all over again. She had yet to go back to foundry, telling Diggle and Roy that the office was really busy though she could help them out from there if they needed anything. But now it was the weekend and she wasn't sure she could come up with a reason not to show up tonight and she doubted Diggle was buying it.
So Felicity made her way to the back entrance of the club feeling a little more at ease than she had in a while. Punching in the code,she opens the door and makes her way down the metal stairs to the foundry. Her footsteps seem to echo off the walls, and as she leaves the final step she takes a deep shuddering breath and shakes her head realising that a part of her had expected to find him there, training, planning….waiting for her. But the room is empty with no sign of Diggle or Roy either.
She quickly steps back into the old pattern as she boots up her computers and usual programs. Her searches haven't really pulled up anything new and she can see Diggle has been using her computer. She rolls her eyes as she put things back to way she likes them. How many times did she have to show him this way was much more efficient. They would have to have another one of their talks.
She tries her best not to let her eyes drift upwards to the salmon ladder, but she can't help herself and as she stares at the hard metal, her mind is invaded with images of Oliver, the sound of his voice, the way he looks at her when she's in the middle of one of her rambles. She remembers her last words to him and the ones she should have said. She tries to keep her mind from the nightmares and dwells only on his rare smile and those deep blue eyes. Imagining him moving along the space of the ladder, knowing she was watching him as she knows he always did.
A hand on her shoulder breaks her from her reverie and for a single moment she imagines that when she turns it will be Oliver smiling down at her. The moment is quickly dispelled as she spins to find Diggle looking at her with concern and something else she doesn't want to think about right now.
"Hey, We didn't't expect you to come in" She notices Roy hovering in the background and briefly wonders how long they've been there. Oliver would not be happy with her attention span right now.
"Things got a bit quiet in the office, so thought it might be better if I helped you guys out from here. "
He nods his acceptance. "Roy and I were just going to do a little training-"
"What the Hell are you doing here?!" Felicity and Diggle both jump at Roy's anger, and turn to see Malcolm Merlyn making his way down the steps to their very secret lair. How did these guys always know where they were? Felicity rises from her seat and follows Diggle as he moves forward, Gun raised.
"You have about 30 seconds before I put a bullet in your head.." Malcolm raises his hands, his face seems almost pained.
"I have a message.." His eyes drifting to each of them. "There have been whispers….. From the League."
They all stand in silence, awaiting the inevitable news and Felicity feels as if she can't breath, her eyes stinging as the heavy words reach her ears. "Oliver Queen is dead."
She's not sure how long they stand there before she turns back to her computer screens, unsure what to do, what to say. It wasn't true. It couldn't be. She would know. She takes a shuddering breath allowing it to fill her lungs but unable to push the pressure off her chest.
"Why should we believe you?" it's a half hearted demand from Diggle, his voice wavering slightly.
"I don't really gain anything by telling you. I thought you should know….I…I don't know how to tell Thea."
"That you sent her brother to die for her to save your own skin" The anger seeps into Roy's words, his hands making fists, desperate to take this guy down.
"I've been keeping her safe"
"She'd be safer when your dead" There's another tense silence the words still rolling of the walls.
"Where's the body…" it's barely above a whisper and they all turn to look at Felicity. Roy feels himself deflate and move to place a hand at her back. He can only imagine what she's going through. Malcolm clears his throat, shaking his head. "I'm sorry, I don't think it was recovered"
Recovered? Her mind races… what does that mean? How could they not recover it? Because he's not dead her body screams. She can feel her emotions, anger rising against the pain in her heart. She would know. If he was really dead… she would know. "Get out." It's just a mumble at first. Malcolm's still speaking but his words just seem to be jumbled. Fought hard. Honourable…
"Get out!" She whips round, throwing off Roy's hand and glaring at Malcolm.
"You heard her." Diggle raises his gun once again as Malcolm nods and leaves the way he came.
"We should have killed him." Roy looks from Diggle to Felicity trying to control his haggard breaths, bringing his anger under control. "Digg?"
Diggle turns to the metal table before him, dropping his gun and resting his hands on the cold surface, his head slumped in defeat. He shakes his head, his chin trembling. "God Oliver…"
Felicity takes a shuddering breath and slips back into her chair staring unseeing at the screens before her.
Malcolm's words seem to echo once again off the walls. "Oliver Queen is dead"
It seems a long while before any of them speak again and its Diggle who breaks the silence. "I….I don't know what we do now"
"What do you mean?" Roy looks up at his mentor and friend, his eyes stinging as he holds back any further tears for their fallen friend.
Diggle seems hesitant and lost, waving a hand in the air. "I…. all of this…without Oliver."
"We carry on." Both men look up in surprise at the calm and confident way she speaks, her back ram rod straight, her head held high and just like that she starts typing. "We do what we always have. Take care of the city. Continue his crusade"
"Felicity…." Diggle glances at Roy sharing a concerned look.
"There's still crime…..still work to do. Oliver will be pissed when he comes back and we've let the city fall back to bad habits." She nods to herself.
Diggle sighs as he pulls himself up to stand behind her, dropping a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Felicity."
"He's not dead." She counters to the unspoken words. "He'll be back…He's survived the island…..Hong Kong….Slade….The count….and so much more than we don't even know."
"Felicity…" Her computers bleeps as some alerts are pulled through and she pulls up a couple of police reports.
"Look likes there's been some home invasions…Maybe you guys should patrol …see what's going on. I'll see what I can find out."
Diggle lets out a hard breath and nods. He knows she just needs some time. He can give that to her. He squeezes her shoulder and inclines his head to Roy, as they both move to change.
"John…." Felicity turns to her friend, her voice a little more hesitant than before. More unsure. She glances at the glass casing. "Maybe you should wear the hood tonight?"
Diggle moves in front of the case, staring at the leather outfit. Feeling an ache run though his chest.
"It's a symbol…..People need to see it. Until he comes back" She nods to herself again in assurance and turns back to the screens, lost furiously in her research. Diggle takes another steadying breath and readies himself for the night ahead.
AN: Please let me know if you want me to continue and any ideas you'd like incorporated. I plan to bring in Laurel and Thea...not sure about the whole atom thing yet.