The office was quiet and dark, even though it was only early afternoon. Most of the lights were turned off, and the sky outside was so overcast that very little sunlight made it through the windows. The few others who had work to do on Christmas Eve had disappeared shortly before noon. Alistair knew he should be leaving, too. He needed to be on call in case of an emergency, but Aedan wouldn't expect him to hang around till nightfall.

Yet, he was reluctant to leave. On a day like this, the office felt more like home than his own apartment. At least here he had a Christmas tree, a small potted one that Aedan had put up at the beginning of December and Leliana had decorated. At least here he would know what to do with himself, while everyone else was celebrating with their friends and family. Whereas at home…

He swallowed hard. If he closed his eyes, he could still hear Zevran's voice, cold and distant. I was a fool to let this go on as long as I did. Yes. And he had been a fool to imagine that Zevran could really be interested in him. What did Alistair have to offer that could tempt him into settling down? A guy like Zevran could have anyone he wanted. He was probably out there right now, in some bar, flirting and laughing, enjoying the admiring looks. There was no reason for him to hook up with a needy, boring- Enough.

Sighing deeply, he returned his attention to the screen before him. Morrigan had called him two days ago about a complicated problem with her accounting software, and he still hadn't figured out how to fix it. He'd consulted several online forums about it, but so far, to no avail. Ah, well. At least it was a challenge. Reaching for his mug of tea, he took a deep draught, trying to concentrate. Damn it, why was this so hard? It wasn't as if there was anybody here to distract him…

A sudden noise behind him made him swivel around in his chair. "Who's there?" His voice sounded hollow and squeaky, and he cleared his throat in an attempt to sound more gruff and manly.

"Hey." Zevran hadn't taken off his coat, and his hair was covered in fine snow crystals. He looked pale, and lonely, and dejected.

"Zevran." Alistair wasn't quite sure what to say. "I didn't expect-"

To his surprise, Zevran seemed nervous, too. "Look, I… Brasca, this is harder than I thought. I've come to apologize."

"You don't have to-" Alistair's reply was automatic, but Zevran interrupted him with an impatient huff.

"Yes, I do. I've been an idiot." He stepped forward, closing the distance between them. "I am so sorry, Alistair. I was… scared and panicked and I said stupid things. I thought I had to end this for your sake, and I ended up hurting you even more. I…"

"Please, Zevran." Alistair felt hot and uncomfortable. "You don't need to explain." Lord knows, I understand panic.

"But, I do!" Zevran closed his eyes for a moment, looking pained. "Look, you're not the only one who's afraid of messing up. I made some bad calls a few years ago, and people got hurt. I will tell you all about it, if you wish. Not now, but maybe- Still, that's no excuse. I shouldn't have-" He took a deep breath. "I don't know if you can forgive me, but if you can, I'd like to go back to where we started." Shrugging off his coat, he glanced up at Alistair with a hopeful look in his eyes.

Alistair nearly gulped in surprise. Zevran had- He couldn't believe his eyes.

Zevran had put on the Sexy Santa costume again. A rather more restrained version, with long, tight leggings instead of hot pants, and without the elf ears, but he still looked hot as hell. A familiar heat spread in his groin. Yup, his body was definitely on board with this idea. He wasn't going to listen to his body, though. Even Alistair knew enough to realize that this was a bad idea. Getting back together, just because he wanted Zevran so badly he could barely see straight; that kind of reasoning could only end in more pain.

Still, there was something more to this, and seeing the costume again tonight touched something else, deep inside him. This wasn't just Zevran doing his best to seduce a willing victim. There had been genuine regret in his voice, and Alistair didn't doubt that he was sincere about wanting to start over. But, would that be enough?

"It's not about forgiving. I'm not mad at you, not anymore." Alistair was struggling to find the right words, but this was important. "It's…"

Zevran didn't answer, didn't push him, just gestured for him to go on, and he did his best to speak calmly. "I… I do want to be with you, Zevran, I really do. But, we're so different. You're… You're amazing and hot and confident. You blow my mind. I am shy and I say stupid things, and I blush a lot. And I…" God, this was hard. "I really don't know what I'm doing in bed, and you're used to all kinds of exciting and wild stuff. You probably want a lot more than we've done so far, and I don't know if I can ever-" He broke off. "See? Here I am, blushing like a school boy. I'm just not sure I can ever be what you want."

A moment of stunned silence followed his monologue. So, that's it. Now you've ruined your last chance. Yet, when he dared look at Zevran again, there was no trace of anger in the other man's face, just an odd, focussed expression that he couldn't place.

"What I want…" Zevran sounded almost thoughtful. "No, querido, you can't be what I want."

Alistair stared at the floor, too dejected for words. This has to be the worst Christmas ever! Not that he could recall many good ones. He was trying to fight back the tears rising to his eyes, when he felt a cool finger on his cheek, tracing his jaw and lifting his chin, so he had to look Zevran in the eye again.

"You can't be," Zevran repeated, and he was really close now, leaning over Alistair, almost straddling him. "Because I want far too much." His voice was burning with intensity. "I want your smile. I want your stupid jokes, and your hang-ups and your fears and worries. I want your body, too, because you're too gorgeous for words."

Zevran laughed, a rough, throaty laugh that did interesting things to Alistair's insides. "God, Alistair. You're right that I want more. I enjoy sex, querido, and I want to show you everything I enjoy. I want to make love to you. I want your hands and lips and tongue on every part of me."

Alistair was blushing again, though how this could be, when all of his blood was gathering elsewhere, was anybody's guess.

But, Zevran wasn't finished, far from it. "The things I've dreamed of… I want you so deep inside me I can taste you. I want to hear your voice screaming my name, whimpering as I make you come over and over." He sounded almost feverish now. "I want all kinds of crazy things. I want you here, in the office, bent over a desk. I want you in my bed, on the floor, in my car, on the roof, everywhere. I want to tie you down and have my way with you for hours, until you're hoarse from begging. I want to watch you fuck Isabela, and I want to take you, with her looking on. I want things you can't even imagine."

A long, low whine escaped Alistair's lips at those words. Listening to Zevran had made him hard as a rock, dizzy with desire, but at the same time, he was beginning to be scared again. He couldn't see how-

Zevran laughed softly, brushing the lightest of kisses against his lips. "I want all of this, Alistair, but I'm a big boy. I know we can't always get what we want." And now he actually was in Alistair's lap, grinding slowly against him, because of course he was hard, too, and he felt so good. "I know I can't expect these things from you, at least not right away, and maybe never. So, I'll just be happy to get what I want most, no? And that's you." Another kiss, soft and almost teasing. "You, and whatever you're ready to give. And I'll promise to do all in my power to make you just as happy in return."

"Zev…" Alistair didn't know what to reply. He was trembling all over.

"Shhh." Zevran placed a gentle finger on his lips. "No more talking." A grin spread over his face as he pulled Alistair's hand gently down to the waistband of his pants. "Time to unwrap your present now." His tone was teasing, but his eyes were dark and serious. "I am yours."

Their lips met in another kiss, deep and hungry this time. Alistair's head was suddenly buzzing with happiness. Not such a bad Christmas after all.

They kept kissing and touching, and he was rapidly losing all ability to think coherently, what with Zevran's hot lips nipping at his, Zevran's scent driving him mad, Zevran's smooth, silky skin everywhere. Eagerly, he worked his hand under the thin red satin, impatient to get the silly costume out of the way.

It was at this moment that he remembered a line from an old story someone had told him years ago, and he almost laughed out loud, because it seemed so very fitting and yet so naughty, given the circumstances.

Yes, Alistair, there is a Santa Claus.

* The end *

And that's it, folks. :) I had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope you enjoyed reading it just as much. Many, many thanks to my wonderful beta suilven, and to all of you who kept reading and reviewing. Oh, and there'll be a sequel (of sorts) soon. :)