Why, hello there! How simply spiffing to meet you! This is Lady Darkshine, if you haven't realized it yet, and I'm here to tell you a bit of a story. No, it's not gonna be some lame "once upon a time" story with fortunate endings that make your eyes sparkle. It's not even something that I'd write for my readers. Those of you who thought that's what they'd get for accessing this page, just for a second, get real. This… is an interview. "Interview: A meeting to which two or more persons face each other for the purpose of obtaining information as to aptitude, skills, etc. When one may be interviewed, one may mumble, shrug, murmur or gurgle (see Jean Chrétien.)"

            I got my shinning moment to interview the characters from the wildly popular Harry Potter Series in the Great Hall of the Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Yes, folks… this will go down in history. I traveled overseas… way overseas… to meet these fascinating individuals, and speak with them on an utmost personal level. You may access information that is highly dangerous, exciting or even… dare I say it… humiliating.

            So sit back in your seats, my readers… because you're in for a bumpy ride.

…~'*'~…

Me- "Here I am, overseas at England with one of my newly obtained friends, Albus Dumbledore. *shuffles stack of papers* Now tell me, Albus… what is your opinion of the Harry Potter series. What's your thoughts of the whole idea?"

Albus Dumbledore- "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."

Me- *looking confused* "Pardon me?"

Albus Dumbledore- *chuckling* "I do apologize, Miss… Darkshine, is it? I've watched the most hilarious Muggle movie recently, Gone with the Wind. Fascinating, that Clarke Gable is, don't you agree?"

Me- *raising eyebrows* "Er… yes."

Albus Dumbledore- "I think the idea of a woman writing such a series is brilliant. It gives insight for Harry Potter, and he could use that at the moment, with all the accusations made."

Me- "I agree completely. And that brings me to another question… about the book burnings-"

Albus Dumbeldore- *jumps to his feet* "Why, those nasty scoundrels… you'll pay! You have no right to perform witch burnings, you POMPUS COWARDS!"

Me- *looking utterly frightened* "Book burnings, sir. Not witch burnings. *now ignoring the fact that Albus Dumbledore is acting like Leslie Neilson, more than anyone* "So to the point… how do you like the way Joanne Rowling created your character? Did she get inside your head at all?"

Albus Dumbledore- *stares at Lady Darkshine for a long moment* "Do you honestly think this white mane of mine is natural? And these aging wrinkles happen to be fake *folds his arms and looks away*"

Me- "No, sir… your area and character. Did she capture that at all?"

Albus Dumbledore- "Well, apparently not. I'm quite bright minded, as-a-matter-of-fact. I haven't as many mind-drifting-off sequences as my character has… and I have a longer attention span *spots table in front of him. Looks intrigued. Runs a finger over its surface* Simply fascinating. Pure mahogany."

Me- "Professor Dumbledore. Sir? Please, I'm not quite finished my interview."

Albus Dumbledore- *thumps fist on table, looking outraged* "Come on out, you dirty rat!" *stares at table expectantly*

Me- *Looks at camera* "This interview is over."

…~'*'~…

Yep. It didn't take me long to realize that I caught Albus on a bad day. Apparently, a certain notch in the table we were sitting at had done something naughty. My camera crew and I left as soon as we could afterwards, and caught up with a real acquaintance of Hogwarts Academy, the oafish-seeming giant Rubeus Hagrid. He invited me inside his cabin for an interview after a little convincing and brought me a cup of tea. I began to think that an interview with him would be completely ordinary and composed… boy was I wrong.