chapter thirty-seven: time

"Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me." - New Moon, Stephenie Meyer

"Mother!" shouts Zuko's desperate voice and Ursa nearly drops her granddaughter. She quickly catches Izumi in her arms and tries to focus on the task of protecting the crown princess.

"Shut up, Zuko!" screams Azula in an urgent tone Ursa has never heard in her voice.

The city burns as her children are tumbling down the hall at her. Zuko is half dragging Azula by the arm, their wives in front of them, Mai with blades drawn and Ty Lee fists clenched. Ursa's heart starts to speed up as she sees Azula's facial expression and realizes this will be the most untimely birth in Fire Nation history. It has to be.

"Mai told me to watch─" Ursa begins but Zuko interrupts.

"Azula's having her─" Zuko shouts.

"It's not coming out unless I say it's coming─" Azula snarls but Zuko shouts again.

"Azula, stop talking and─" Zuko exclaims.

"Azula's having her baby?" Ursa interrupts and the siblings are silenced as if they are children again. Azula has one eyebrow nearly touching her bangs as her expression seems both pained and challenging. Zuko's eyes are wide and lips parted, his heart beating nearly through his chest.

An explosion goes off within the city, rattling the walls of the palace. Azula chokes on her own saliva. This is not a good day in the slightest. She feels a surge of panic coursing through her as her mother sets down Izumi and takes Azula by the arm.

"Unhand me─" Azula begins, but Ursa pushes her onto her back on the bed. Azula inhales sharply and angrily; her mother has no right. But Ursa is simply trying to save her daughter and her second grandchild, regardless of Azula's anger.

"Tell me how far apart your contractions are," Ursa says and Azula grits her teeth. Her eyes keep flickering towards the door and Zuko is already recalling how terrifying Izumi's birth was.

A crash echoes down the hall and Mai grabs Zuko.

"We have to go."

"You can't just leave me with my mother!" Azula shrieks and Ursa swallows her words.

"We'll come back for you as soon as the Avatar gets here. Zuko, Ty Lee, let's go," Mai says and she and Zuko head into the hall.

Ty Lee pauses, her lips pursed. "I have to make sure they don't die, Azula. I'll be back as soon as I can."

And before Azula can protest, Ty Lee follows the others. Ursa and Azula are left alone together, Azula in seven kinds of pain and confused by what is happening to her body despite what doulas have been explaining to her. Ty Lee truly should have mothered this child, and as Azula digs her sharp fingernails into her own mother's skin, she thinks that Ty Lee fucking Zuko is preferable to this.

"Azula that hur..." Ursa doesn't finish the words because her daughter's eyes bulge not in anger but in fear.

"I am... kind of nervous, mother," Azula says very slowly, nails going deeper in her mother's skin. Ursa breathes in sharply through her teeth. "You've done this twice, what am I supposed to do?"

There is a painful silence.

"I'm not going to leave you, Azula." Ursa feels like she should have said something better, or more helpful, or more significant, but it seems to work.

"You better not." Azula tries to overcompensate. "Not again."

Ursa does not argue.

"I'm never leaving you again," Ursa says and Azula digs her nails deeper.

It takes two hours for Aang to show up with Appa and Katara. They rush through the motions of making it to the palace, where they find Zuko, Ty Lee and Mai in the middle of a fight. Mai is wielding Zuko's swords, hacking and slashing. Ty Lee is crying between punches, and Zuko is dripping sweat from the heat of his own flames.

"Took you two long enough," Mai snaps as she slashes open the neck of an assailant. Blood splatters out like a smashed orange.

"How many people did you piss off?" Katara demands bitterly as she freezes a man in ice. Only Zuko could conjure the Fire Nation into a complete revolution of anger and explosions.

"Take over for Ty Lee, Katara," Mai says, not dignifying that question with a response. "She probably should be with Azula."

"Yeah, where's Princess Trustworthy now, huh?" Katara snarls and Aang is surprised at her anger. Katara is simply grateful that greatly exaggerated news of the waterbender's lesbian promiscuity did not reach her husband.

"Having a baby," Mai replies sharply. Katara is silenced with one look.

"I want to meet the baby," Aang says blithely as Ty Lee starts running down the hall. "I mean, after I save the Fire Nation, of course."

"What kind of baby is it?" Ty Lee exclaims frantically as she hears crying.

"A... human?" comes Azula's shaking voice.

Ursa laughs. Azula cannot remember the last time she heard her mother laugh. Has she ever heard her mother laugh?

"It's a girl," Ursa says, gesturing to the baby in her arms. Azula is sitting on a chair, in a robe, looking half traumatized. Ty Lee is not sure who she should go to first, but she is saved by Mai walking in and sitting beside Azula. Ty Lee walks to her child and picks her up and instantly loves her.

An explosion rattles the walls, but it is met by a gust of wind. The Avatar is at work and everyone feels strangely at ease for having their nation upturned in an all out revolt.

"So... Azusami, I guess?" Ty Lee says with a shrug. The newborn sticks its tongue out at her and she gets more excited than she should be. Or maybe just the right amount of excited. This is thrilling.

"Your baby was born while the Fire Nation burned," Mai remarks laughingly as Ty Lee is babbling to her baby. "As Nationalists tried to murder Zuko, your baby was born. I hope you feel good knowing that, Azula."

Azula does not respond. But she smirks faintly.

As the riots die down with the work of Avatar Aang, a family is made.

And the room is swiftly stifled by an airbender, a Fire Lord and a sullen looking waterbender.

[X]

Time after Azusami's birth goes by infinitely slowly. Every second that passes burns like a fresh wound. But it does not feel like the rapid blasts of an Agni Kai; it feels like Azula is slowly being cooked from the inside out. She feels like a terrible person, like the worst of both of her parents.

"I love you. I do. I really do," Azula tells the baby who cannot understand her words. She is trying to reassure herself more than the baby that constantly tugs at her mother's hair and claws to be held like an animal.

She holds one year old Azusami in her arms and tries to think of the reasons why she loves her child. But each time, she comes up short. The days and nights go on like this; politics and parenting. Dealing with issues on the home front while Zuko cavorts about in Republic City. They act as if the revolution that attempted to occur as Azusami was born was nothing. It was a great loss for The Resistance. But they live and Azula is their icon.

The Resistance is messy. She supposes she will just have to keep abeting concerns and rooting out liars, cheats and nationalists in ways that go against the fabric of her being until Zuko dies or she dies. Or maybe the Fire Nation will collapse on itself.

But as she works and works to try to keep her Nation from devouring itself, she constantly surrenders herself to the baby with the gold eyes and thick black hair.

Is this my life? Is this the life of the girl who conquered Ba Sing Se? The girl who dreamed to burn down the sky? Who could if she wanted, do anything she imagined?

Yes. Yes, Princess Azula, yes it is.

Isolation ticks by. What Azusami needs she takes. Isolation ticks by.

Ty Lee gives Azusami a bath. Azula walks away, shivering at the thought of it. It repulses her. That night, Ty Lee shouts at her for being a distant parent.

"You hate your mother! Azusami is going to hate you just like that!" Ty Lee exclaims, probably waking the entire palace. Azula does not know what to say. "You're never there for her. Only when I force you. She barely knows you, Azula."

Azula stands mute for a moment. She knows what she is doing to her child, and she does not want to be doing it, but she still does. She walks to Ty Lee and grabs her by the arm. Her hot fingers singe skin as she does not give her wife a chance to get in a single motion to stop her.

She throws her on the bed and takes her. And then spends the entire night crying hysterically as Ty Lee packs and leaves to stay with her grandparents. Azula does not fall asleep, but drags herself out of bed in the morning. She cannot face Zuko and Mai; they will know that Ty Lee ran away.

Out in the courtyard, she conjures lightning on her fingertips. As the electricity reverberates through her slender body, it does little to soothe her and she tries to remember when and how she lost her way.

Ty Lee comes back and Azula apologizes incessantly. She has bandages on her arm from the burn and Azula tries not to look at it. Ty Lee was burnt by Azula, and it felt like a kiss. But what happened afterwards was enough to consider just giving up on the slowly sinking Princess Azula.

"I'm sorry. Please," Azula whispers frantically and Ty Lee kisses her hesitantly, gently. And Princess Azula can sense her fear.

"You don't have to apologize. It's fine," Ty Lee lies and Azula pretends to believe her.

Azula blames Azusami for what happened. It's the child's fault that her relationship with her wife is crumbling. It's because of Azusami that Azula burnt and raped Ty Lee. Azula detaches herself entirely from the one year old, missing first words.

Princess Azula sits in the living room, Azusami clutching the coffee table beside her. Azula is working through reports on the resistance in the country, possibly gathering for another attack of the caliber of the one that punctuated Azula's screams of childbirth with explosions and screams of death. She is, of course, ignoring her daughter.

"I think she wants to walk," Zuko says, lying on the sofa and skimming what Azula intently read and annotated.

"Well, she better start practicing," Azula replies scathingly and Zuko cringes. He wishes she did not say such things about her own baby.

"Teach her to walk. Come on. Do it," Zuko insists. He pauses, thinking of words to exploit his sister. And then they come to him, "Or are you too scared to?"

"I'm not scared of an infant," Azula snaps, seizing Azusami by the hands. She holds her as she slowly walks by her side. Azusami clings to her mother's leg as they walk in circles.

Azula slowly breaks away and Azusami crumbles slightly. Fuck. But Azusami pushes herself up with her small hands and tries to make it to Azula.

"Come on," Azula says as kindly as she can. Azusami struggles, and it goes on like this for an hour before Azusami has taken seven steps.

And so Azula teaches her daughter how to walk.

Isolation ticks by. What Azusami needs she takes. Isolation ticks by.

As Azusami turns two, Azula sits on her throne and gives advice to those who work for the rebels. She burns the death threats after tracing the words with her fingers a thousand times. She was once such a glistening icon of power and fear; people still see her as that. But her child owns her like a slave.

Isolation ticks by. What Azusami needs she takes. Isolation ticks by.

Azusami has nightmares tonight. She is two and regularly her brain subjects her to night terrors about burning, everything burning. Azula had them too. Almost the same ones. She struggles to find words of comfort as the child curls up in her arms.

"Can I sleep in your bed tonight?" Azusami inquires softly, petting Azula's hair, and Azula wants to slap her. But she does not. She knows better than to do that.

"Of course not. That's unnatural," Azula says, leaning against the wall of Azusami's bedroom. It is beautiful and gilded, like what Azula once lived in. Except there is a plethora of toys. They spill everywhere, a path of destruction everywhere Azusami goes. Azula does not know how to keep up; she surrenders her daughter to nannies and Ty Lee.

"Izumi sleeps with Uncle and Aunt," Azusami protests and Azula struggles to think of a good lie. Her mind is addled from insomniac nights and endless days.

"That's not how our family works," is all Azula offers. Azusami does not protest, and she falls asleep in Azula's arms, after a long time. Azula puts the child in her bed and walks towards her own room.

Isolation ticks by. What Azusami needs she takes. Isolation ticks by.

Things get better. Things get worse.

Azula hates everything. Hates her isolation. Hates her daughter. Hates herself.

The higher the pedestal, the harder the fall.

Every second she spends in the presence of her daughter feels like the cold and wet fourteen hours she spent chained to a grate at fourteen. Every kiss she shares with her wife feels like the betrayal at the Broiling Rock that sent her reeling to failure. And every day feels like the four years she spent in prison.

Isolation ticks by. What Azusami needs she takes. Isolation ticks by.

[X]

Azusami is almost two. Azula holds her in her arms and gazes at her intently. She thinks of when she was a baby, when she was a child and when Lu Ten was going to be Fire Lord. Her life was so much easier. She was brash and bold because she could be, and no one would stop her. But now she is a ghost of herself.

This palace is a graveyard. Azula haunts it.

"Azula," says mother, as if her opinion matters. "I want to talk to you."

Azula is watching Azusami practice walking. She feels a dryness in her mouth and an overwhelming sense of defeat. But still, her daughter's little motions bring a smile to her lips. Her relationship with her daughter is complicated and hard to understand.

"No one is stopping you, mother," Azula says haughtily. She attempts a regal sigh and fails, simply exhaling a little too loudly.

"It's my fault that you struggle with her," Ursa says, frowning. "For that, I'm sorry."

"I don't need your apologies." Azula does not say it abrasively and Ursa is amazed. "I don't. You did what you could and I shouldn't hate you for it."

"I..." Ursa can only blink.

"We're never going to get along mother. You and father are the reason I'm so screwy. But I'm done dwelling. I have a child. I can't keep... doing this. I simply can't."

"Oh, well, I..." Ursa is left speechless.

"Maybe someday we can work out all our issues over tea and shopping. Right now just... don't bother me with it. I guess I forgive you or something." Azula shrugs and catches Azusami as she starts to fall. The baby babbles an apology, and Azula smiles warmly at her. Ursa sees something in her daughter that she has never seen before.

"Maybe someday," Ursa repeats softly.

[X]

"I have no restraint, Ty Lee, I'm sorry," Azula says, glaring at the sunset as if it has personally angered her. They have been fighting again, mostly about their two year old. Things have been on the rocks for a long time and Ty Lee supposes she should have expected that when she married Azula.

"It's okay, Azula. We're going to work it out." She sits beside her, knees touching her chin. They are outside in the courtyard in the slight winter chill, permeating their skin with goosebumps.

"Your optimism is sickening," Azula says with a small smirk. Ty Lee presses her lips against her wife's and it feels as electric as it has for over a decade. Each kiss sends a course of lightning through her body, shocking her senseless, warm and arousing. Each touch is as significant as the first. Each date bringing butterflies. So maybe they fight and maybe Azula is terrible and Ty Lee is sometimes worse but their relationship was never going to be perfect.

They love each other. And it does not need to be spoken aloud.

"Do you want to be with me, Azula." The question escapes Ty Lee's lips fairly often.

"I don't do anything I don't want to do," Azula murmurs and Ty Lee can feel her dipping her into the waters of Ember Island on their wedding night, of frantic and tender sex in a shady inn as they tried to evade the Avatar. They have a colorful past and Ty Lee is more than pleased to be a part of it. Good times and bad.

"Well good thing you want to be with me," Ty Lee offers, shrugging.

"Happy anniversary," Azula says and Ty Lee's eyes widen and sparkle.

"I thought you forgot." She clasps her hands excitedly, eyes rotund as the moon gradually rising. Every time Azula looks at the moon she thinks of the fact that Ty Lee is under the impression that Azula slept with a waterbender. It was all a lie. And Azula swore she would never lie again. At least, not to Ty Lee.

"I haven't ruined it?" Azula asks, picking at her fingernails. Their fight probably was heard in the South Pole.

"We can still make the best of what's left."

Still, they love each other. As impossible as it is. As impossible as they are.

"A few hours?" Azula glances at the sun rapidly sinking in the vermillion sky. Sunrise is her favorite sight; sunset her least favorite.

"I can think of what we can do for a few hours..." Ty Lee giggles.

[X]

Almost three years have passed since the riots died down and the rebellion was weeded out, all as Azula watched and felt helpless. She feels better most days. Worse other days. And all days she is surrounded by Azusami, who desperately wants to be Azula, but has no idea how sick of an idol Azula is.

Sometimes, in the morning, Azusami breaks free of Ty Lee or nannies or the watchful grasps of her elder cousin Izumi and she watches her mother train. Azula moves through motions, conjuring lightning. Azusami finds it incredibly impressive, and she could watch for hours.

"How do you do that?" Azusami asks in preternaturally coherent sentences. She is an astute child, and clever, with Azula's eyes and pointed features, with thick black hair that falls down past her shoulders and is often in her face. Beautiful, clever and with a wicked streak. Azula looks at her with an odd sort of envy, and a twisted sense of pride, and her emotions are so confused by Azusami that she often shuts her out altogether.

"It takes years to master," Azula says, stopping. She pauses. Everything in her desires to continue training, but Azusami looks expectant. "I could show you, I guess. You can't bend or ─ can't bend yet. But I'll show you the motions."

It is Azusami's third birthday tomorrow. Ty Lee has planned an elaborate party, with the same guests that attended her wedding. It seems needlessly lavish for a child's party, which Azula would prefer to spend amongst only the family, but it is going to happen and she will have to deal with it. At least Katara and the Avatar and even Sokka have grown more bearable over the past few years. Katara forgave her for the vicious lies, which Azula finds strange but does not protest. She still feels isolated.

Azula walks Azusami through the most basic firebending forms. Technically, if Azusami could bend, she would be showing her still poses and teaching her how to breathe sunlight, but this is all for show. They move through the elaborate dance, Azusami surprisingly keeping up with sloppy motions.

"Speed is less important than doing the motion right," Azula says, feeling like her father. She fights the urge to shudder. But Azusami listens and learns. Not that it matters; you can't even produce flame. "You know, if you want to actually practice firebending, it isn't about the pretty poses. It's all about breathing."

Azula sits down on a rock. Azusami focuses intently on her mother for the thousandth time, but this time, Azula feels mild connection.

"Do you feel the sun?" Azula asks and Azusami looks at her like she is crazy. Azula hates that look. "When you breathe in, imagine you're breathing in the sun. Slow, controlled breaths. And don't think about anything else but your breathing."

Azusami crosses her legs and closes her eyes. Obediently, she begins to breathe. It is pathetic at first, and she sneezes a couple of times ─ and after sneezing insists on rubbing her nose on Azula's sleeve ─ and complains for a few minutes. Eventually, Azula gets up and leaves. She cuts her training session short and lets Azusami's nannies deal with her meditation.

The night before her party, Azusami lies in her small bed. Her bedroom was once Zuko's, but all of the decorations have been redone a thousand times to fit with her daughter's phases. Despite the rocky relationship with Azula, Azusami has all she asks for instantaneously. Maybe that makes her even more like her mother.

"Tell me a story. A real story," Azusami begs, tugging at Azula when she finishes tucking her daughter in the blankets. She hates doing this, but she and Ty Lee have been taking turns, and Azula only has so many excuses before Ty Lee responds, Even you aren't that good of a liar, Azula. Now put our daughter to sleep.

Azula hesitates and then sits down at the foot of the bed.

"I've never really told a story before," Azula says. It true, save for the lies and melodramatic speeches.

"It's not hard. Just start with once upon a time there was..." Azusami's eyes widen and sparkle as she begs like an animal. Azula sighs.

"Once upon a time there was a princess, like you," Azula begins, loathing this already.

"Uh-huh." Azusami looks needlessly excited. This is going to be a very boring story.

"And all she ever wanted was to be perfect. She lived in an imperfect empire of isolation, and she grew up alone without anyone except the man who held her hostage."

"Ooo, trapped princess, this is good. She gets rescued by true love, doesn't she?"

"You'll find out if you stop interrupting," Azula snaps. Azusami bites her lip.

"Sorry," she squeaks.

"This princess pursued her dream relentlessly, but she could never quite get it. And then, one day, she was allowed to live the palace she was held captive in. The man who held her prisoner told her she would have her dream of perfection if she was able to reclaim his lost possession─"

"Magic sword!"

"Okay, okay, his magic sword. And the overweight man who stole the magic sword."

"Why overweight?"

"I'm trying to be descriptive," Azula snarls and Azusami squeaks. She tugs at Azula.

"Sorry. Keep going!"

"So, the princess set off to reclaim the magic sword, for the first time exposed to the real world. She found help from two lost friends she once knew─"

"I thought she grew up alone." Azusami furrows her brow and Azula rolls her eyes.

"Are you going to let me tell the story or would you like to tell it?" Azula says and Azusami clamps her hand over her mouth pointedly. "Anyway, she went on an adventure with her two friends, to get the magic sword or whatever."

"What kind of adventures?" Azusami asks and Azula sighs.

"They went to an ancient city and had to fight the forces of an evil waterbender, her pathetic imbecile brother, and they had another magical artifact─"

"Necklace! Ruby necklace!"

"Okay, okay, shh. Ruby necklace." Azula snickers about something Azusami does not understand. "So, the princess had once heard that this ruby necklace could grant perfection if she was able to capture or destroy it. So, she abandoned the quest of her captor, and decided to get the ruby necklace so she could become perfect."

"It didn't work out, did it?" Azusami frowns.

"No. Things never were that easy for the princess. Somewhere along the way, the princess fell in love. With a charming runaway noble who the princess's captor forbade her to see. And with the girl she loved and some other incidental helpmate, the princess conquered a city and destroyed the ruby necklace.'

"Did it make her perfect?"

"No. No it didn't." Azula starts to stand up.

"The story can't end like that!" Azusami undoes herself from the blankets that Azula carefully wrapped. She grabs her mother's arm and refuses to let go. "Make up more."

"Fine." Azula sits back down and wonders if she will be here all night. "The princess returned to her home with her true love and also the magic sword which she got when she destroyed the ruby necklace. All seemed well for the princess, even though her dream was not achieved. But then the unthinkable happened, the magic sword was stolen again, by the evil waterbender from earlier. And she had also repaired the ruby necklace."

"She sounds terrible."

"You don't know the half of it. Anyway, the princess was forced by her captor to reclaim the magic sword, and so she went to find it. She almost had him, but then her true love betrayed her."

"You called the sword a him," Azusami protests.

"Slip of the tongue," Azula replies bitterly. "Her true love betrayed her. She returned to the palace and was held captive again. And her captor gave her one more chance to be granted perfection. But when the time came, she fought the waterbender who wielded the magic sword, and she was defeated."

"Is that... is that the end?" Azusami asks sadly. She looks completely dejected.

"Ugh. Okay, I'll continue." This is going to take all night. "The princess thought this was the end, but she was destined to be held hostage again."

"By the same man."

"Sure, if that makes it simpler. Then the unexpected happened and the princess's true love undid her betrayal and rescued the princess from her prison. They got married and had a baby. And then the princess died. The end. There's really no more after that."

"She died? She didn't become perfect? They should have lived happily ever after. That was a terrible story," Azusami complains, frowning fiercely. Azula shrugs.

"You asked for a real story. There are no real happy endings," Azula says, picking at her fingernails. "Will you go to sleep now?"

"One question."

"Go ahead," Azula replies with a regal sigh. I don't have time for this.

"Why did the princess want to be perfect?"

"Because she didn't know it would only end with misery and death. Happy now?"

"Not really." Azusami slides under her blankets. "Goodnight, mother."

Azula kisses her daughter on the forehead, although it makes her queasy to do so, and walks to her own bedroom. That was an exercise in frustration.

Once she arrives, she finds Ty Lee undoing her hair. Azula's lip trembles slightly and her nose tingles, but she controls herself before she slips up too evidently.

"Will you sleep with me?" Azula asks, and she is not ordering. Ty Lee notices that and feels a moment of concern.

"What's wrong?" Ty Lee asks, walking to her wife. She touches her wrist and leads her to the bed, but before they initiate anything she demands, "Please tell me. Did something happen with Azusami?"

"It's nothing. I was just thinking about life," Azula says and Ty Lee knows she means her life before Sozin's Comet. She has a particularly wistful tone when she discusses what she could have had, but just could not get it.

Her desires consist of I wish I could, but just couldn't. And Ty Lee has thought to fix it, but she can only be drawn closer and tighter. If they dive; they dive together. And if they subsequently drown, they will share a watery grave entwined.

Azula kisses Ty Lee's lips, enjoying the taste. They touch slowly, hesitantly. Ty Lee is treating Azula as if she is fragile, and in response Azula slowly bites down on her wife's lower lip. The acrobat leans into it, removing her clothes with ease and grace. She wraps her legs around Azula and they find themselves interlocked, kissing, hitting and missing, fondling and trying to reach some kind of paradise that does not exist.

Nails dig into Ty Lee's spine and she moans. They fall into each other, Azula's tongue running along her wife's clavicle, down towards her breast. Ty Lee wraps her fingers in Azula's hair. Burning kisses like fire across her body.

Dipping lower. Reciprocation. They lie there together silently.

Azula is distant and detached, as she has been of late. Rarely is she present anymore, and Ty Lee no longer tries. Slowly, Azula's hand moves to hers, and Ty Lee holds on. They fall asleep with blankets half off due to the abysmal heat.

"I love you," Azula says before they pass out, but Ty Lee does not hear, or so she believes.

She misses the small smile of her wife.

The next morning, Azula tries to avoid the party preparations. Guests are streaming in from all corners of the world, and Ty Lee is ordering servants to put up decorations. She is making it nearly impossible for them, nitpicking every detail.

Finally, the party begins. People flow in, bringing their children with them, as disgusting as that is. Hakoda, Suki and Sokka's daughter, immediately latches onto Azusami. They are the only kids who are the same age, and they start playing together eagerly. Azusami is far better with other children than her mother was; then again, she picks up far more on Ty Lee's behaviors than Azula's.

Almost instantly, Azula and Mai find themselves sitting in the corner with cups of tea, standing on the sidelines and watching.

"This party is so boring," Mai sighs and Azula smirks.

"It's not terrible," Azula suggests, shrugging. And it's Mai's turn to smirk.

Ty Lee bounds over to check on them, trying to keep up with all sixty of the guests. Azusami is looking overwhelmed with her own well-wishers. Izumi keeps getting patted on the head, much to her dismay, and Azula looks at her pissed off face, which is very similar to her father's.

"Look at 'sami playing with Hakoda. Oh! Can you imagine if they get married someday!" Ty Lee can be heard a mile away as she approaches Azula and Mai. Azula is already looking at Azusami playing with the four year old boy garbed in blue, and Azula does not like it one bit.

"It wounds me to see my child playing with a water peasant." Azula looks at the bottom of her empty teacup. "They are forbidden to marry. I'm saying that right now."

Ty Lee grins as Mai rolls her eyes. Azula continues to look incredibly sullen.

Meanwhile, Aang feels on the outskirts. He is used to being incessantly approached, being the Avatar. But at this party, everyone seems distracted by the two young cousins, children of the notorious royal siblings. He does not mind the peace and quiet, accented by the gentle music and his cinnamon Fire Nation cake, which he likes. The cake reminds him of Kuzon; it was his favorite.

"You're the Avatar, right?" comes a small voice significantly below him. He slinks to a kneeling position to face Azusami. She looks frighteningly like her mother, but also cute. It is a weird sensation to see a little Azula.

"I am. Happy birthday," he says, smiling at her. She smiles back, and she most certainly did not inherit her mother's wicked smirk.

"Watch this," Azusami says, holding up one hand and staring at it. She furrows her brow in concentration, and her palm lights up in ruby. Aang is taken aback by the sight.

"Did your mother teach you that?" Aang asks as her fire fizzles out. She frowns.

"No. It just happened today," Azusami says, trying to summon fire again and failing. Aang smiles to himself as he looks at Princess Azula sitting unhappily in the corner with the equally unhappy Fire Lady Mai.

"I'm going to give you some fire to hold. Be very careful or somebody might get hurt," Aang says, already pleased with himself. He lights Azusami's palm and she bounces excitedly. "Go show your mother." Aang taps her back and she runs off, hand on fire. It does not go out of control, as Aang worried.

Azula looks at the lovefest of the Four Nations in the palace ballroom. Ty Lee has ran off again to greet guests, and Azula has lost sight of Azusami.

"Azula, your kid is firebending," Mai says out of nowhere.

"Stop being such a bitch," Azula snarls viciously and Mai can only sigh.

"No, really, look." Mai grabs Azula's arm and Azula sees Azusami coming at her, one hand on fire. The partygoers are already starting to stare.

Azula steps down from her chair and walks to her daughter.

"Mother! Mother, look!" Azusami shrieks, drawing even more attention to herself. She holds out her palm of fire, beaming. Azula feels a weird melting feeling inside of her chest that is unfamiliar to her.

"That's earlier than me," Azula murmurs. Azusami holds up her other hand over the fire and starts contorting it and passing between her hands.

"Look! Look!" Azusami shrieks. She keeps jumping and Azula uses one finger to calm the fire before the overexcited child burns down the palace.

"Are you crying, Azula?" Mai is hovering over her shoulder like a looming purple shadow.

"No. My eyes are broken," Azula retorts icily, grabbing Azusami's hand to put out the flames and hugging her tightly. "Stop gawking, peasants!"

"This is so beautiful, I'm going to die." Ty Lee hugs Azula tightly, squeezing her half to death, and the entire family is wrapped around each other. Azusami wriggles out, kicking, and leaves her parents staring at her.

Aang nudges Katara. "Helping people, all in a day's work for the Avatar."

She smiles, shaking her head slowly.

[X]

"You haven't said something snarky in an hour. In fact, you haven't said anything in an hour," Zuko says, watching Azula stare at Azusami. Azusami is playing with dolls, completely ignorant of her mother's fixed gaze and thousand yard stare. The dolls are locked in a fairly intense battle.

"I don't..." Azula trails off, silver tongue feeling like actual metal. "My daughter is a firebender."

"That's predictable," Zuko replies snidely, sitting down beside her. "Were you expecting a waterbender or something?"

Azula shoves him and he wobbles slightly. Her heart was less in that assault than the bolt of lightning that nearly nabbed her the throne four years ago.

"I feel really... happy," she says hesitantly, the words slow and drawn out as if she is picking them out from her lips one by one. The head of one of Azusami's dolls pops off. "She's so young. And she seems to have real potential."

"She is your kid," Zuko remarks, as if it is something grim. "Now, please don't do anything crazy when you start training her."

"I promise," Azula says earnestly, golden eyes glittering with mild amusement. "Turning children into human weapons can sometimes traumatize them."

"Sometimes," Zuko repeats with a small snort.

"I feel... bad, too." This is like pulling teeth to Zuko, but he bears it for the good of the Fire Nation, and the good of his sister. "Because I stopped hating her as soon as I saw her carrying fire."

Zuko does not know what to say to that. Finally, he decides on, "It's just how you were raised. You didn't have the insufferably annoying undoing of all of father's influence by Uncle."

"It was annoying?" Azula is startled; Zuko has so much love for General Iroh.

"Have you met Uncle, Azula?" He tries to be playful about it. She simply shrugs, though he conjured a small smile on her rosy lips. "He embodies annoying. You're not as bad at this as you think you are. Never thought I'd say that to you of all people."

Azula pauses, scrutinizing Zuko for any sign of a lie. "You really think that?"

"Yeah, yeah I do," Zuko says earnestly and they momentarily sit together in silence.

Slowly, hesitantly, Azula walks to Azusami and touches her back. It feels strange for a moment, but she allows herself to do it. And then Azusami thrusts a doll into her hand.

They play together, and Zuko laughs at how terrible Azula is at playing dolls.

"It's not like you would do any better!" Azula snaps at her brother. He tries his best not to smile as she punches him.

Maybe things will work out.

Just maybe.

The End

but

continued in the sequel Aphelion, now posted